In the Midst of Wilderness.

I Thought I had It all figured.
My life was what it meant to be,
I didn’t know the worst,
Was yet at rest.
In the Midst of Wilderness.

Today my back aches,
The aches of success I was promised.
They said “a degree will be your triumph.”
But it seems like my triumph is poverty I face,
In the Midst of Wilderness.

I was born a happy child, full of dreams
And happiness.
But all I feel is sadness and shuttered dreams.
Was what I did wasn’t enough? Today I ask questions
That no-one can answer.

ALAS! Lord can you hear my cries,
In the Midst of Wilderness?
Am I punished for using the roots of the earth?
Nor you leave me hanging on the cross like your Son?
In the Midst of Wilderness.

Thou I vow, if my success is not promised…
I shall lie in this deathbed.
Through it, I shall be Abraham of contemporary.
I shall rule against all contraries.
Even In The Midst of Wilderness.

Soul mate
I’m sorry for over loving you.
I’m sorry for my bipolar disorder and
Episodic moments.
I’m sorry for not being good enough for
Your companions and family.
I’m sorry for my loyalty.
But I warned you that the world leaves,
So will you.
I don’t blame you,
You only wanted the world.

Fears of the Unknown
I do not fear what I know I am capable of doing,
I fear what I don’t know I can possibly do.
Fears of the unknown are greater than the fears of,
What is known?
To begin with the intentions of strangers,
Not to mention the mysteries of world.
Nor the undiscovered facts of universe.
We perverse and converse on tirelessly
On findings with no hard facts with no intents.
Deeds and words that could leave you *******.
In heart, physically and spiritually crippled.
It’s just Fears of the Unknown.

Lord I ask you to guide me,
Though I have fears,
My heart in tears of what I have left.
Help me!
Help me triumph against all odds.
Give me strength and audacity,
To believe that all is possible.
Even in these dry, cold nights,
Swallow my fears
And wipe my tears.
Lord please guide me.

I needed you.
He wanted you.
I valued you.
He admired you.

You asked me to leave.
I chose to stay effortlessly.
My love for you turned evil.
My character changed suddenly.

You left with rage and malice.
I chose to forgive and release.
Lost my identity for you.
Lost myself in you.

Past, although we bury you
In the depth of our backs,
You never seize to fly and catch up
With our future.

I gaze back to the day I plucked
In your garden.
You endured,
The pains of love you felt.

Not that I gape in dark days,
I know rainbows and sunny days
Were there too.
I have sinned you.

But the amount of my sins cannot
Amount and surpass the love I had for you.
We were stuck in the stardom,
Now we are trapped in our own misery.

Greatest dread I had, was to lose you.
I suffered in dismay daily.
Was it a spell that was over me?
How can I have sweetest of my joys while
You are lingering in my mind?

Past seize the dead thoughts,
Free me from my sins of cries.
****** my demise,
So I will bury these bygones.