i don't need god, i tell god.
i need a surgeon and money.

god are you there? please talk to me

god?

please

there is teeth, that i have, and there is marrow, which i do not,
because when we slaughter this year's chickens in preparation for a feast we will eat all of it,
just like you have taken my bones and emptied them,
you do not have teeth, resigned to suckle ,
i wish i was free of taint, there is teeth, that i have, and i wished i had ,had the nerve to bite back,
because there is only the remnants of a proboscis eating my marrow,

(sexting) i thought of holding your hand for hours today

and i would lay down the world at your feet
but there is nothing that is worth anything
close to you. lay down with me on rain soaked
concrete, let us dream of distant sunrises
press your tongue to the pavement and let
the world dissolve like an oversized pill
as though it would cure the ache of matters
relating to the heart.
i heard a song that sounded like it was through
an old record player. and it said that it was
worth giving your whole heart away
than to keep it forever cold and sheltered
i thought of you then, how precarious your grip,
blood soaked hands clutching at an ending not
meant for us.
arteries that dilate as pupils do
due to proximity, due to epidermal ridges
pressed against each other so tightly,
together in lockstep, forever and ever
as though you would fall if i let you go.

i may have you chained in my orbit
and i'll never let you go
but i know you'll still miss the sun
485,000,000 miles away
inverse cube law reducing
the light to nothing
yet still warmer than anything
you'll find here on europa.
and who knows if there's life
or it's just ice
all the way down
for kilometers
and she's so cruel
but still so kind; in comparison
negentropy, a spark of light
better than anything you'll find
in this frozen wasteland of my mind
better than minus 210 degrees fahrenheit
desolate ocean, planet's end
and i know you'd rather feel the warmth
of a distant sun; always better
than anything
you'd find
on europa