i prefer to have them watch me
its better than them not to notice
now do you understand
the short shirts and ***** shorts
see through tops show bras with no underwire
eyebrows filled in and lips filled with lip liner
ive become unaware of my volume
speaking loud enough to show my power
why should i hide
wanting to make a hero i made a monster at the same time
the names labeling me are more than likely true
i don't fear the looks they give
they almost fuel me to stand taller and show a bit more
say what you must
your words will feed my lust

left cup runneth over/

right cup half empty/

if I add my left cup size to my right cup size what will I get/ DD + D = DDD/I've never been great at math/but this is no/miscalculation/

I am 36 DD confined to a 36 D bra/

(D)Disgorges over the underwire/

D--you flaccid beach ball/I wish I could reinflate you/part my mouth around your ******/and/
breathe/

no one can tell/unless I wear a tight bodice/then/you are/obnoxiously evident/

I am afraid of introducing you to my future boyfriend/will he still want to undress me/will he still want to make love to me/

will he still want to touch you/

you/

sea urch/in/the palm of my hand/

even I am hesitant to hold you close to me/

you/

strangulated bagpipe/

moulting pompom/ B-O-O-B/
what's that spell/
what's that spel/
what's that spe/
what's that sp/
what's that s/
what's that/

what is that/

what/

who are you/

you/

waning gibbous/

my metaphors wane, also/it turns out there are only so many euphemisms that can be assigned to an/ill-proportioned breast/

itsy bitsy titsy/

you make me/

sad/

you/

teardrop defying the laws of gravity/

or/
is it the laws of gravity that defy the teardrop/so that it never falls into/
place/

I've noticed only/beautiful/things/
fall/

shooting stars/

autumn/

my left *****

This antique mirror boosts no confidence. Concave

reveals its magic tricks with an incurvate

red surface. Some human hair



blending braids are there to fancify your boxers, your removable

metallic silver suspenders underwear and

her red bra underwire slips. It is a new style.



I feel anguish, when I touch the pull locks. Her picture

of the antique statue is hidden between all those things. She



enters the mirror to kiss you every time you look at it. Like jelly candies



are her lipsticks on that silver, but

they have different taste. For me,

they look like isoquants, or indifference curves. I want

to leave you. What do you think?



The water that drips from the mirror, when I wash it, is like crimsonblood. Scary



optical illusions split the reality into two variants through my woe,

and create a much looser and less direct relationship

between us than ever. You live for

your comfort and versatility. You cannot change it.

On the first day, I'll look to you
And see the light of the Earth
Alive in everything you do.
And on the second day,
I'll create my own world of seclusion
Away from all of your ignorance.
But they can't all be ballads
Because where would suffering
Finally find its home?

On the third day, I'll discover
Folk music and rhyme.
I'll waste my time
Seeing what isn't there,
The ideals I've made my shelter.
On the forth day
I'll hold you in my arms,
Kiss you deeper than I ever have.
Force you into things you don't understand.
Because you're like a thirty-something year old ******,
Thinking a metal underwire is a pack of smokes.
But they can't all be ballads,
They can't all be the same.
If they were,
None of us would be in possession of our names.

On the fifth day,
I'll leave you after finding discontentment
Over how you find upset in unfamiliar places
And make minnows into whales.
On the sixth day, I'll regret it
But have nothing left to say...

They can't all be ballads anyway.

I.
With strappy, **** cutouts at the back, this is tempting at every angle.
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∙ Front and back bows
∙ Low rise
∙ Minimal back coverage
∙ Imported polyester/spandex

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∙ Back closure
∙ Double row of hook and eye closures; Sizes 36DD & 38D-38DD have triple row of 

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∙ 4 settings to ensure a perfect fit

Details & Fabric
∙ U-shaped ballet back prevents band from riding up and offers more coverage
∙ Supersoft, double-lined sides for the smoothest shape
∙ Keyhole and bow at center front
∙ Imported nylon/spandex

Lift these sagging *****
With an underwire bra
Lift my bad mood
like a shining star
Lift the mean of the world
like my shampoo
Lifts the dandruff
Out of my scalp too
Lift my sad eyes
With a broad smile
Lift all my defenses
With compassion
Lift these mistakes
With forgiveness
That’s all it takes
Lift my spirit
Like a helium balloon
Put a song in my heart
Float me away
Not a moment too soon
Lift love
Like it was leaven
In bread
We don't need hate
The world needs a face-lift
And fast
It's not too late
Don't let time pass!

Eck Ramsay, a retired underwire manufacturer,
bought a boil in the bag cod slice at his local Spar shop.
Upon removal of its cardboard outer garments
he was surprised to find it contained a small book.
The book titled the Plaice of Cod
(a philosophical treatise on theology)
contained many essays on the ancient rites of summer,
several of which were wildly inaccurate
and a few that were accurately wild.
In the appendix there were twenty-three songs
attributed to a medieval troubadour,
who led a travelling medicine show called the Rollwrong Stones.
  
William Lancaster Blake built himself a chocolate castle
on a hollow hill and sold it to his mate Bill,
a scribbler of worthy words who wrote of the hills and lakes
and how long it takes for the ghosts of soldiers to cross the fells especially when led by centaurs.
  
Self-proclaimed king, My Other Pen drags on,
took to haranguing passers-by with tales of dancing seals
and Jewish fiddlers who wouldn’t play marriages on the Sabbath, and how the wedding guests always got ******.

Stan Tony and Drew made up the crew
which some say numbered sixty-nine
or seventy-two, but no-one could swear
how many were there especially
on the Whispering Nights……… when nothing seemed right
and the cattle lowed on their knees.
And the slightest breeze on a pewter plate
would vanish the seed that couldn’t be seen,
and dreamers would dream
of jumping through flames
that carried the names
of those who were soon to be dead.

Goats head soup
with yarrow root
was served to the guests …..whose favourite request
was Wort of Sacred Johnny,
they'd dance all night …..till the Isis light
sent the Oak root bones …..scurrying home
to the place where the days are shorter.
When the dew on the grass  …..comes to pass
and the herbs have been nailed to the doorway,
when the heron's been kissed…and all are well dressed
and the False ones only moved slightly
the cuckoos will sing. "a new day I bring"
and the treetops will shake with the dancers
the day is but done and the Knights just begun
to get a little bit longer.
   But stranger than this was the wish of the dish that had it away with the spoon. "hey.. kat play that fiddle"
And riddle me no riddle
I need to get high as the moon….
"which moon?" enquired the hare "Kieth or the very Reverent moon?"
"Oh either will do…. Their just different shoes
to the ones I'm currently wearing"
and with no more ado…… Stan Tony and Drew
the Stones roadie crew
withdrew
for the next seven years
their horses drank tears
and everyone's fears
were fried up for breakfast
with marmalade toast
two sausage
mushrooms
and beans
eggs over easy
rashers done crispy
a fried slice or two
and a teapot of glue
to ensure it stuck to the belly.

The mushrooms of course enjoyed these proceedings to such an extent that they were inspired to compose poems praising the nights adventures, these were subsequently published in the society pages of the Lost and Found trade journal.

The bacteria within my clogged nasal passage fight to see the light
My sandpaper throat takes up arms to be heard over the deafening din
Come into the light, she says; embrace what you are, how you look...
Who you seem to be;
But I can't, I don't want to, I shan't.

I turn around, take a step away
Two steps now, my black socks getting dirtier every second,
Every minuscule moment of this pathetically dull existence
Words, spinning within my metaphorical brain
Hurtling around: subsonic, then super
Uncatchable first, incomprehensible now
Raw, wild, honey & dates
Thaw, mild, funny fates.
Intertwined, intersecting
Neutral, calm, unaffecting.

Lo, and behold
The minty phosphorescence of a happy soul
The harsh contrast of a cerulean one, serene and calm
Bells in the distance, tolling
Strolling along a cherry blossom-lined pathway to nowhere.

Light cutting shapes through the dusty fawn net
Reflecting off the velveteen cushion, scarlet
Dancing now, on the sequined gold but torn
gold, but torn
Torn table cloth, snagged by the claw of a domesticated feline.

Tail wagging, agitatedly
Fast now, then slower
Claws exit the sheath
The fire within causing the ringing of multiple high pitched alarms
No smoke to do the detecting
Old bloke, what are you protecting?

Of that old but weary
Old
Weary
Leatherette case, rexine perhaps?
Yes, rexine. You are the rexine of the universe
cheap, spoilt and ugly
peeling off
looking in the mirror at myself
yes, she says, I am rexine.

But no, I am the dancing celestial light of 3 AM,
I am the beginning of a cat's purr.
I am the lost dusty books of an auctioned abbey
I am the last drop of water.

The sky on a bad day,
Clouds gathering
Soap lathering, (Made in France (c))
It says.

I am the 2% navy-dark-ink-pale blue of an underappreciated sunset
Viewed from a filthy beach.
I am the cracked glass in the cupboard that someone has forgot to dispose of

I am the unregistered number plate
the first dry petal of a once fresh marigold
Offered out of sheer boredom, playfulness

I am the sticky key of an old 1989 keyboard
I am the grease stain on your favorite shirt.

I am the betraying exposed underwire of your favorite bra
I am the lost button.

The maybe, the perhaps, the never
The maybe the perhaps, the ever

The gestation period of a tiger, she says
Is 113 days.//

In twilight lonely lackluster receipt of this
viscous silent cycle centering around
apocalyptic promises I wait fearfully for~
the whole world out there in its tiny little
self-centered orbit just like me,
one disappearing non energetic electron
spinning off into an apathetic position that doesn’t
seem to jell toward anything of cohesive consequence
I keep looking up from the tarmac praying my
habitual convict on the lamb might remember
your radiator hands around this underwire waist
but all my memories have been tossed aside as
moody as mercury and judged by a sky
of saints that trickle down truth in controversy
I can feel nothing the way I use to~
just paper play date dementia and perdition's probability
where in a few more years I'll barely recall my own name

Written by Sara Fielder © June 2015

A pretty girl got seven stitches and watched while the
Needle wove through her arm
A pretty boy broke her heart and she forgot to be angry
A pretty father and a pretty mother in a big, beautiful house
Sobbed in the night and clung to each other like soggy paper mache
The girl wore hospital socks and turned over the underwire in her bra
Staring at the green curtain clanking against the metal track above her
Praying for an ambulance man that would never come
And a god that would never save her
She stopped praying
And got the stitches removed seven days later.

i became the only boy
that i wanted to take
my shirt off for
step out of my pants
without falling over
and pull my socks off
one by one

i don’t really know
how this whole thing works
but it seems like dinner
would happen first
maybe i’d bring flowers
say how handsome i look outloud
and mean it

if i still had to wear a bra
i would buy a nice one first
splurge on something more
substantial than a sports bra
maybe something with
an underwire and little ribbons
show that part of me some love

and i would be slow about it
run my hands over this body
that dysphoria has always kept
me from exploring
with my own flesh against flesh

take the time to learn
all the curves and edges
of this vessel that has never
really felt like home
always too tight around
certain parts and too loose
in others

but that wouldn’t matter
because i would be a gentleman
and do this with the lights on
pull my shirt off
in a way that wasn’t rushed
and begging to be put back on
right after it would hit the floor
at my feet

and my knees wouldn’t shake
mapping out the parts of myself
i always wanted to cut off
and my breath wouldn’t falter
but go out easier than it had
in years

because i am the only boy
i ever wanted to take
my shirt off for
and i deserve to feel beautiful
and handsome
and fragile in some parts
because i am still here

******
i am still here

thick, slapping it with
metallic cherry lipstick. Flashing
the ivory as elephant’s tusks. But not
letting them strip you down, removing
the husks.

You plaster it on
the corset and silk underwire
bra. You stand as a donkey braying
“hee-haw”

You plaster it on
sugary, the tone and the pitch. But you’re
wicked as the wicked witch of
the west. Inside each breast is patch of
black lying dormant from every whack.

You plaster it on
the perfumed spray, so the dyed honey-
suckle hair looks like a float in the Macy’s
Thanksgiving Day parade.

You plaster it on
the charm, dying a little every time,
drowning in a glass of ***** and
lime. Smashed as a walked-on banana –
Sick of this Pollyanna

Hello, I'm Sandra

of your garter, that hold up
your stocking, but not your
vertebra. Barter for wanton
lure. The men, translucent
and elastic hook on in a snap
as the nylon, without the strap.

They strip you
of your cover. Your armor is
strapped on and wrapped in lace
and underwire, and shall expire
in a couple of years. You've rusty
gears.

They strip you
of your prestige, label you
a tease. You revolt with crimson
lipstick and black widow mascara. You,
a Mata Hari hiding in your sherry. Pain
ripe as berries swallow down your grief
through clenching teeth.

in the wee hours of the morning
sits a middle-age woman
at her computer in nothing more
than an underwire bra and trim *****

singing as she’s typing, line after line
exposing her flesh and her soul for all
to graze upon, like the cattle in the fields
she yields her sweet milk for them

to drink, unpasteurized of course. Her
voice hoarse and the words integrating.
Isn’t it exhilarating! The whole world views
the artist on display

her red lace, push-up, underwire
bra. Remembering the days
she didn’t wear a pretty contraption
that's useless beyond a confining attraction.

She slipped on
her spiral silver hoops. The holes
in her head match that of
her bed. She fills them in with
trinkets she picked up at the five-and-
dime, when she's not penning rhyme.

She slipped on
her stained apron to do
the cooking. None are booking her
for poetry readings. Her poems are
as her leftovers -
stale and cold.

She slipped on
the water that sloshed
from the cat's bowl
onto the floor. Fell on her *** -
sat and relaxed.

She slipped on
by his house without
a visit. She paid him many
in 2005. Now all she does
is hang outside.

She Used

false eyelashes to make her eyes
appear wider, just as she used her underwire
push-up bra to make her ******* look more like watermelons

than tiny plums. She used her looks to get attention,
so people would listen. But they were too busy
ogling her to hear a word.  She used her mouth to please

men ******, so that they may lover her unconditionally. But
that never worked, even though she perfected the art
from watching pornographic movies and looking

through girlie magazines. She used alcohol to drown it all,
so that she could bury the shame. But when it wore off
she had to face herself every morning

in the mirror. The wrinkles on her face told her
that she was too old to be playing this game. That's when
she decided to use the sleeping pills in the refilled bottle on her night-stand. That’s the end.

of chestnut-honey locks
a contradiction of non-fiction in 34 B underwire
so, they see her as this 5.2 115 lb. outlandish freak
who streaks for everyone in the comfort of
her basement walls
as she grinds out lines and hollers
as they pull the plug
because
its too much for them
to take in

your red satin underwire bra
with his socks
to make
your B ******* look like
double D’s
to make a guys *****
sneeze.


You stuff
your memory
with insults
the man said.
You have it
locked inside your head.

You stuff
your face
with ice cream and cake
and a chocolate martini
to wash it down.
You cringe at his lifeless body
lying beside you in bed
that can’t perform.
This is your new norm.