https://soundcloud.com/catullusrp/keepsnappin

What happened to dancing?
And I mean grooving
Moving to the beat of the music
not that
back to front, raunchy, distasteful, vertical *** on the dancefloor foolishness
I don't want any of that unclassy bending over
***** pressed up against a stranger, up in my face,
I mean up in my behind business type of dancing.
None of that too-close for comfort, get-a-room type of grind
I want some of that smooth jazzy, hold my hand and spin me around moving, and
I want some of that 80's finger-snappin', and some of those Breakfast Club hip-shaking, arm-gyrating
What I don't get is why
The moves from ***** Dancing seem cleaner than today's so-called dancing.
I want to be able to go to a club
And have enough space for myself and you to be dancing like we're dancing at home,
with the privacy of our rooms
I want to be able to dance, and let us return
and have a much-needed cultural dance revolution where it doesn't have to be something your mama won't be ashamed of.
I want some of that jiving, and more of that 70's finger-pointing, and fast-feet moving
Man, I just want all of us to dance without it suggesting anything more than smooching.

It ain’t too bad to be from there
Just ask my family and friends
But it’s too flat, ain’t no way out
The roads are all dead ends.
Sometime soon I’ll find a place
Where the music I’ll enjoy
But for now I keep on tryin’
To escape from Illinois!

There’s a river on the border west
That moves a lot of dirt
Mighty Muddy Mississipp
Drowns the pain and covers hurt
Yeah, I’m movin’ south to New Orleans
Maybe I can find employ
In a blues bar down on Bourbon Street
Escape from Illinois!

Well I stopped a week along the way
When I saw the Gateway Arch.
But the folks out by the airport
Were stagin’ up a march.
Seems a white cop fired a shot that killed
An unarmed teenage boy
Oh yeah, the teenage boy was black,
Escape from Illinois.

Kept walkin’ to the Landing
(Named for Pierre Laclede)
It has most every thing you want
But nothing that you need
Some travelin’ folk told me some news
That made me jump for joy
Memphis maybe had some work
Escape from Illinois!

Found the haunted house called Graceland
And the grave where Elvis lay
Where half a million go each year
(Fifteen thousand every day)
They all want to pay respects
To the rockin’ – rollin’ boy
Put their finger in the bullet holes
Escape from Illinois.

Went downtown, knocked on some doors
Once or twice I went inside
But Beale Street was broken
The travelin’ folks had lied.
‘Cuz there ain’t no jobs in Memphis,
Or maybe I’m too coy
So I hitched a ride to Nashville
Escape from Illinois.

Nashville’s a big old meltin’ ***
Lots of great ones started here
But most end up as tourists
Getting’ ****** and drinkin’ beer
So money’s at a premium
And fame’s a fake decoy
End up workin’ in a record store
Escape from Illinois?

From Asheville to Atlanta
From Austin to LA
From Biloxi back to Baton Rouge
Need a place where I can play
I’ll follow all the buskers,
Form a musical convoy
Livin’ day by day and town by town
Escape from Illinois!

I’m a minstrel, like a rubber band
I keep on snappin’ back
I’m gonna make it somewhere
Singing somewhere, that’s a fact
Got my guitar and my music
Gotta do what I enjoy
Find a place to sing my songs for you,
Hell, it may be Illinois!
Phil Lindsey  6/4/15

We're off to Never never land - Paracetamol, cucumber sandwiches and the lost rent boy

Gav called me up.
Him and Tolly were going out to Never Never Land in Blackburn
3 lost boys off on a curious adventure

Mi mum dropped me off at Gavs 'ouse ont' Shad estate
Gav got us a coke before we caught t' buz in
But 'e sprinkled in some white pewder
"What's this? Pixie dust?"
"It's summat to gi' you Speed" said Tolly
"just drink it!" Said Gav
So I did

"2nd Star t' t' reet and straight on t' t' moornin'!"

But we'd bin sold crushed paracetamol

So we just acted like we were ****** and lied to each other about ow buzzin wi were
But we weren't buzzin
Then we caught buz in
Waitin' for t' affects o' t' artificial amphetamine t' kick in
'N' we got t' Neverland
No mermaids 'ere
No pretty ***** girls
There were a few blokes wi dodgy eyes n limps
But no no, no-n-no no, no-n-no no no no there's no pirates!
Just ****** plastic Palm trees
'N' townies in fluorescent nylon shirts
No peacock feathered hats ere
Just steps n curtains n aggressive faces
'N' me wi' a bowl cut and trepidation
Tryin' t' think happy thoughts

Surrounded bi freebooters, piccaroons, Buccaneers, filibusters and Rovers
Wi' their left foot, right foot dancing
And an eye on t' maidens
Sneering in our direction
Lost boys
That 'aven't grown up

I sort o' skirted round edges feelin' scared
Then went to sit at sides on an empty table 'n' hid

On t' next table were a nice lookin' couple o' blokes.
They must o' bin good mates!
They were cuddlin' 'n' touchin' each other a lot.
Anyhow, thi got talking t' mi
Told 'em I'd not bin out before
"Ow old are you lad? 14/15?"
"I'm 18"
Thi sort o' laughed, dunno why
Then one of 'em offered me a cucumber sandwich
I thought t' mi sel'
"I dunno much about nightclubs but I dunt think folk normally bring cucumber sandwiches!"
But I were 'ungry so I ate it
Then I think 'e thought we were mates coz 'e were touchin mi leg
I 'ad to crow for Gav an' Tolly
They came in like Peter Pan and rescued mi and I set off for 'ome

I went to t' phone box n' called mi mum
Didn't know town reet well
So I waited for 'er outside o' mi old school
There were some scary lookin people on one side o't' road snappin at each other like crocodiles
So I stood under t' lamppost so I were int' leet an' t' cars passin could see mi
Felt safer like that
Time passed
Tick tock tick tock
T' crocodiles were lurkin
Each time a car passed I stepped out a bit
To look for mi mum
Drivers kept lookin at mi nervously n drivin off
Maybe thi thought I were a crocodile too
N they kept smirking at mi
Then some officers pulled up like privateers in their blue and white flashin galleon
Made us stand again t' wall as I asked for parle
'N' thi searched mi for treasure
Asked us if I pulled into port for rentin
"Rentin' what? I'm Waitin for mi mum."
"Aye cap'n! Hahaha! I'm sure you are! Dressed in tight little hot pants!"
"These aren't 'ot pants, they're chinos?!"
Then mi mum turned up an said "oh aye! This streets t' red light district!"
"Well ****** me!"

Never, never again... Until uni happened

Long ago day on a country porch… cuz
It was too dern hot in the kitchen…
Three generations of women
Surrounded by trees and fields of greens
Snappin a whole heap’a beans…
Swattin at flyin buzzin things…
Laughin big laughs… and
Tellin small lies…
Wavin one hand as the car goin by
Stirs red dirt into the sultry air
Comin from “down yonder”…and
Headin “up ‘ere”…
Touchin giggle tears
With apron hems
Forward thirty years… and
I still see them… although
I’m the only one left…  

All the bean snappin porch ladies
Have gone the way
Of the natural progression of things… but
I can still hear that old screen door slam
I can still hear the old ladies sing…and
I now sing alone,
The hymn they usta bring
“… it’s anotha day’s journey, and I'm so glad, so glad about it… feels so good to be here”

Gav called me up.
Him and Tolly were going out to Never Never Land in Blackburn
3 lost boys off on a curious adventure

All I wanted to do were stay in and play Championship manager and drink Ribena.
I were a slow starter int' drinkin' scene
Mi mum and dad had bought us a tiny bot'le o' mead once on 'oliday
Took mi about 2/3 years to drink it
Another time I had 2 or 3 cans at Gavs
Blacked out
Set off t' t' taxi wi'out mi shoes on
"2nd Star t' t' reet and straight on t' t' moornin'!"
Then puked out o' t' taxi windo'

But I went
Mi mum dropped me off at Gavs 'ouse ont' Shad estate
Gav got us a coke before we caught t' bus in
But 'e sprinkled in some white pewder
"What's this? Pixie dust?"
"It's something to give you Speed" said Tolly
"just drink it!" Said Gav

(At this point in this poem, it's starting to sound like I were on the verge of some cool, coming of age experience. But Gav were only a naive little lad and it turned out he'd been sold crushed paracetamol)

So we caught bus
Waitin' for t' affects o' t' artificial amphetamine
'N' we got t' Neverland
No mermaids 'ere
No pretty ***** girls
There were a few blokes wi dodgy eyes
But no no, no-n-no no, no-n-no no no no there's no pirates!
Just ****** plastic Palm trees
'N' townies in fluorescent nylon shirts
No peacock feathered hats ere
There hair were all steps or curtains
(I was sporting a rather fetching home cut hair style wi no gel and my neatly ironed school shirt with the top button fastened)

Didn't kno' what to do about this weird scenario
T' girls and t' boys weren't stood on opposite sides at this party
They were all in t' t' middle
****** loads on 'em
And they were doing some sort o' side stepping thing that I found later were called dancin'
I sort o' skirted round edges feelin' scared
Then went to sit at sides on an empty table 'n' hid

On t' next table were a nice lookin' couple o' blokes.
They must o' bin good mates!
They were cuddlin' 'n' touchin' each other a lot.
Anyhow, thi got talking t' mi
Told 'em I'd not bin out before
"Ow old are you lad? 14/15?"
"I'm 18"
Thi sort o' laughed, dunno why
Then one of 'em offered me a cucumber sandwich
I thought t' mi sel'
"I dunno much about nightclubs but I dunt think folk normally bring cucumber sandwiches!"
But I were 'ungry so I ate it
Then I think 'e thought we were mates coz 'e were touchin mi leg
I 'ad to crow for me mates
Then Gav came in like Peter Pan and rescued mi and we set off for 'ome

I went to t' phone box n' called mi mum
Didn't know town reet well
So I waited for 'er outside o' mi school
There were some scary looking people on one side o't' road snappin at each other like crocodiles
So I stood under t' lamppost so I were int' light an' t' cars passin could see mi
Felt safer like that
Tick tock tick tock
The crocodiles were lurkin
Each time a car passed I stepped out a bit
To look for mi mum
Drivers kept lookin at mi nervously and drivin off
Maybe thi thought I were a crocodile too
But they also kept smirking at mi
Then some cops pulled up
Made us stand again t' wall
'N' searched mi
Asked us if I were rentin
"Rentin' what? I'm Waitin for mi mum."
"Aye cap'n Hahaha I'm sure you are! Dressed in your tight little hot pants!"
"These aren't 'ot pants, they're chinos?!"
Then mi mum turned up an said "oh aye! This streets t' red light district!"
"Well ****** me!"

Never, never again... Until uni happened

i like prada(wht u like)
got ***** in mi hand(wht u got)
and all yall ******* be like
yadda yadda yadda yadda
got dame i dont think u even ******* understand come close,
you dont even know who i am
snappin at mi a$$ like a ******* PARANA
you an under ******* achiever
gona
snap ya like a twig...overdosed
nirvana
when im up on the block
all the men faint their gurls hating cuz i am who they aint
im always open so call me for a date
leave your girl behind
she'll never know wht hit her
up though the grass hissing like a snake
she'll never know wht bit her

If you want to make a change

Stray a little from the norm

Be the first to rearrange

And be the one who fuels the storm

Never like the status quo

Go as far as life allows

Always try or....you'll never know

don't wait till then...just do it now

The world is waiting for your input

It's spinning round for all to see

To take a step you move just one foot

That single step will set you free

Take a stand and be aggressive

Don't sit back and wait and hide

The world takes note of who's progressive

Not just who sit on the side

Start a movement, force the action

set the bar and set it high

Make the move, not a reaction

Tee the ball and let it fly

If you wait for things to happen

You'll be always in the back

Tap your toes and fingers snappin'

Positive...you must attack

If you want to make things better

Be the one who's in the front

Swing real hard right at the letters

Make it so and lead the hunt

You have to be a bit abnormal

To take the lead and be the one

Be slightly mad and more informal

Pull the trigger on that gun

The world is great 'cause you are in it

Leave your mark before you die

You never know if you will win it

But, you'll never know...if you don't try!!

Such is the sound–
These hearts are a'breakin'.

Snap.

Only I know that crink in my neck–
that sprainin' a'joints grinding 'gainst disks.
I know how the cold creeks do get in October,
sheets and slabs, it's wet in October.
Listen to those frost-ridden reams underfoot!

Snap.

Cold conversing, I said, "A'hush off. . . Now, now. . . smirk'd, yea-sayin' open an ear–"
Listen to that shard, to them shimmerin' sheets of ice underfoot: Snap.
You'd think them finger-snappin's was some jazz! Jam! Jubilate! Just do it again.
I want an iced, ambient encore; chilled to the bone-core, I grab that glarin' a'glistenin' glass.
The median is near the middle, give that shard a shove, I want to hear it again–

Snap.

That's my kick, my wake-me-not whistle borne of creekwater:
That single soundin' o'shatterin' of sharded sheets,
two halves of a once-whole gripped,
glistenin' a glass singin' as it snaps:

I, ice, do hiss!
Listen: it's in the hiss, man!
And my snaps sound ballistic
when I break, balletic, in two!

'Twas a hiss indeed.
that ice does as electricity:

O' it does cry when it cracks,
it does fizzle as it fragments,
it does spark as it splits,
it does bend light between bubbles,
it does melt in my midst,
things do get wet in October.
O' it was by the creek that I told her:

"Such is the sound of two hearts a'breakin'–
'Tis only ice underfoot."

mm...! you generate an action potential in me

seriously, you got me doin' some
crazy ion exchanges through my axon

you got me spewwin' neurotransmitters
into the space of our synaptic gap
pew pew!

we don't have to touch to be
ELECTRIFIED
oh myyy
my dendrites are standin on enddd!

oh myyy oh myy my myelin sheath is very well developed ;)

this electrochemical transfer is snappin' like whiplash

FIRE IN THE BRAIN!!!

Only when I dream am I safe,I ****** hate the place I'm at,
I ****** hate the pace I'm at forced to slow down to a crawl,
******* all I hate the four walls I'm constantly starin' at,
trapped in an evil habitat,as twitchy as an alley cat,
I'm feelin close to snappin necks,
leavin wrecks of bodies in the walls like my name is west,
my best years are flying past
while I'm constantly harassed by "so called" loved ones,
you're lucky I don't own a gun
-cause seriously don't push me cause I'm at my boiling point another joint?
maybe it'll help me chill,I'm so stressed its makin' me ill

and my friends can't help me,they've got their own probs man
plus I don't like to admit how suicidal Mr Sandman the tough guy is really feeling,
Astral project and punch the ******* ceiling
out of this glass house that's constantly throwin' rocks,
your self obsessed attitudes is seriously a load of ****,
so I try and get my sleep on,
no more time with the leash on,cause the Sandman controls you there,
remember all the nightmares? you've been having recently...
its ME messing with your nocturnal life is payback for my days of strife,
and I can keep it up for years,investing in your deepest fears,
lets see how YOU like holding back the tears,damming up like a blocked weir,you won't be spreading fake cheer,
with the Sandman in full control,
your life your dreams,body and soul,
like Alice falling down the hole,
my goodness!,oh my gracious me,
you really shouldn't stress me,
I'll fill your mind with TNT,
mix it with some ***,
you'll blow your mind like LSD,
and maybe then remember me!(to be continued)

Sand, sand, sand,
Runnin' through my hands...
I've held a million hearts,
Kept my lovers livin'
Breakin', breathin', beatin',
Sand, sand, sand,
Anouther life in my hands
They can't understand,
A billion lifes a goin'
A zillion minds a snappin'
All they see,
All they see is me.

i just left work and i'm still in my uniform
all my best friends are here snappin' fingers like,
hey waitress get me a beer
but i'm not movin' for anyone
finally safe for the night
finally looking into familiar eyes
finally happy
it's ninety degrees and our thighs are stuck to blue leather
it's ninety degrees and our knees are melting into each other
he laughs a little & with a voice half buried in a smile he says,
"first come, first serve *******"
prime real estate
he always gets it
the tan couch resting in a sea of dark blue
soft
worn in
with cloth for skin
later in the night this tiny room is at its max capacity
and here i am, passin the bottle on down to the friends
who are now sitting at my feet,
reading new lyrics off their cellphone's tiny screen
he's got a coffee mug balancing between his knees
half full and definitely cold
rustic black with red flowers growing up the side to meet the handle
the dark liquid swooshes around violently as he bangs the strings
on the guitar he's got propped up slightly in his lap
he's staring at me and then he starts to laugh,
all i have to say is
"you can walk home"
but we both know i can't sleep if i don't see him
stumble safely through his front door
i'll probably be slurring my words behind the steering wheel,
"i am so in love with all of my ******* friends,
the thought of leaving you all in the fall
makes my stomach hurt"
and he'll kiss me on the forehead & tell me to
... get some sleep
but he knows i won't
and he'll worry
until tomorrow
when we'll do it all again

I do a little ditty, a little ditty-doo,
A finger-snappin'-somethin'
That I dittied just for you.
It may not be an anthem,
A ballad for the times,
It may not be the bestest words
Or have the slickest rhymes.
It won't make sense or flow so well
Or tell a lovely tale,
And if you seek inspiration-
Sad to say, it's sure to fail.
But still I did the little ditty,
Little ditty I did do,
And typed it up for giggles
And put it here for you...
And if you find my ditty
poorly made or lacking class,
Rest assured, this poetic ****
Was pulled straight out of my...

"I apologize, baby brother, for my voice waking you;
- but it seems, to me, there are laws to be breaking to-
- night. We need no sleep under the blue moon's rays!
My brother, do you understand what it is that I say?
                                   --
Get up, Giddy! There are copper coins for the taking
- and, simple, fragile windows to be breaking:
- in order to get in, and off, with what we deserve.
Are you in, baby brethren; have you heard-
- my plea for a partner? I know a home on Third - avenue that would be an easy target for me and you.
Within its windows, abundant rubies: I have view-
- ed those precious red gems with my own two-
- eyes. I think it would be, rather, quite wise
- to break into that house while all the lights-
- are out. The home owner can come back and pout
- but you and I will already be over the mount-
- ain range- with those jewels in our hands!
Don't you understand? I have a fool proof plan!
Aegidius, my brother, won't you be the man-
- to come give me a hand? I will not demand;
- I just hoped I could count on you.
- Your worried face has me quite blue!"

"But- Phillip! What if the tenants are still up;
- what if they possess muskets and gunpowder?
I cannot come; I guess I just sup-
- pose I fear that they could devour
- us before we make it through
- that window on Third avenue."

"Oh- Giddy! That's what's so pretty
- about my scheme; I already have,
- the last few nights, scouted out the scene!
It does appear to me- that they leave
- every night at nine thirty-three
- and their carriage leaves the city!"

"I am not sure, Phil; if anything goes wrong:
- our lives are a pretty hefty bill- to pay..
All because we wanted to get away:
- out over that vast mountain range
- with bright, shiny red jewels in hand!
Don't you understand? Even if we gauge-
- the scenario right and escape, how long-
- will we end up on the run from men with guns?
I cannot join you, Phillip- dear brother o' mine.
I hope you think twice before making up your mind;
- for: it would hurt me to see something happen
- to you. Should you go: I pray not to hear snappin'
- of muskets firing fatal shots on Third avenue.
Do what you have to, but, I can't join you."

"Aegidius, how has it come to this?
Shall I give you, now, one last kiss?
For: after this evening, I may not ever return;
- the devil may grab me and I may burn- away.
Down there with Lucifer, I'll be forced to stay!
It's okay! Don't cry, Giddy; if I have any success:
I'll hide you a few rubies
- under that ole' tree on the mountain out west-
- of Eldorado."

With that: Phillip threw on a dark cloak and turned.
Aegidius left out a plea of his own, "Don't go, Phil."
Phillip looked back, grinned, and left- still.
You see? Phil needed to acquire his thrills;
- after that night, though,
- he never again smashed in any windowsills.

got wabs from a lad
the scabs said its spot on
nice fat bags
with a little green leaf on em
scallys and their vanity
taggin themselves for taxin
easy backtrackin
you can almost hear the fingers snappin

and we grow yet older...
love of my life...
    knees snappin
         joints poppin
              just percussion
                        dear one
                             accompaniment to a life much lived
background music  to match
             my heartbeat matchin your heartbeat

as we grow yet older...
           and gently kiss each others pains away
here
       here
              and there
                         and here
                                   and again right there...
this could be fun...

lay hands on me baby...
                           let me love you...

pretty girls snappin' away
straight ******* pretending they're gay

outside, older men catcall
in my room, i silently bawl

funny girls tweeting for fun
300 retweets make them stun

8 year old boys know what moaning is
thinks it's funny, making their girls his

school playground's bully is big
peer pressures nerd in taking a swig

movies in Hollywood are less dramatic than my life
when will the end come to this strife

I SAW THE BEST MINDS OF MY GENERALIZATION
wearing halos of fog,
opening their eyes with a burst of surreal an' shattering
the beacon of light
with a splatter of the gray matter... afterwards it all became
so fug'n trite.

I'm phrasing perfect with a hint of propulsive barb'd barkin'
—Man, I am aching to blather,
**** man, it's more than ****-cheek chatter—
it BBBBBBBBBButt bubbles with a puhcussive tootin';
a howl absurd!

I raise a cup & say cheers t' Allen Ginsberg

"O BLOATED BLUES an' DECIBELS DANCE
t'BALLYHOO'd BE-BOP FLUNG
An' BOMBS BUSTIN OPEN with Gear's CLAWING
t'BE AIRBORNE",
Yes, he SITs IN a SPACE SHARE'd with us;
finger snappin' & poetry clappin' from
a heavenly ladder's rung...

A MAD HATTER's CHINA TEACUP is filled
with continuous soft crackling liveliness of effervescence...
and buoyed by the holy soul jelly roll that moves
through here now.
So let us praise and bestow upon him,
a heartfelt bow before we etch on the walls
of my primitive pome cave
our beatnik chorale reverberation of "AND HOW!"

By "ooznozz"