"retrain" poems
The light pollution
from the lives of little people
in the big city
reflects off the lowriding clouds,
the same way my knees reflect
in the little puddles
from the big rains.
It hurts my eyes to look up
without sunglasses,
hurts my lips to think of tasting
the subway oil that
drip
drip
drips
I speculate at the transformers,
part automatic, part people
in their pre-ripped jeans,
learning to get their Ns
to drive themselves away,
yarn trailing from their sweaters
like parade float streamers.
Citizens run so fast
to catch the early train home,
freefalling down the stairs
breathing in the exhales
of the other racer’s exhaust.
Marking their triumphs
with participation ribbons.
The pacific pants at toes,
a puppy that only occasionally misbehaves.
Impatient for attention,
waves wagging back and forth,
up the imitation river,
past the downtown.
Kicking the sea wall with it's gravity boots.
The geese are on hiatus
until they can take back the city.
Making the drains overflow,
creating their own habitat,
they’ll strut their haughty markings,
distinguished from orcas,
away from any saline nonsense.
Were we to retrain the population
to turn blind eyes,
we’d be much more efficient,
stop wasting time contending
to society’s obsession
with documenting itself.
But then, what would we do all day?
Creating light pollution
must give immediate gratification.
Once all the lights are turned off,
the influence won’t continue,
creating a lack of permanence,
making our need to be remembered
seem trivial indeed.
Nov 11, 2013
Nov 11, 2013 at 1:57 AM UTC
When I sleep dreams please take head
I’m not accustomed to this speed
spliced with music art and ****
this rhyme a warning and a plead:
Many men look back at me
their eyes memorize silently
I trade in who I used to be
degenerating empathy.
Friends no more are there as well
waving constantly farewell
who they are now I can’t tell
heavy water stains still dwell.
Though no longer what you were
your name a prayer spoken unsure
Instills the fact there is no cure
clear direction- violent blur;
I am a man and I’m a boy
both utensil and a toy
immoral morals, high decoy
let flirt with death, young cold and coy..
So please I beg you, dreams of pain
let sleep consume me, peace sustain
let night air fill my broken brain
through the wind myself retrain
Let me wade in water deep,
let my faith forwardly leap
worry sow and disdaine reap
Troubled Poppies for Endless Sleep.
Apr 21, 2017
Apr 21, 2017 at 4:32 PM UTC
Those words were painful to hear
I don't know if you know it
Because I certainly don't show it
And won't bring it up in conversation
Only via written representation
Can I say it without hesitation
So here goes it...
You know you lied.
(To yourself mainly)
A total fabrication
One that destroyed my vision of someone sacred
Altered love to blind hatred without persuasion
From which I'm now trying to retrain
Because I've missed out on important days
That should've been filled with celebration
Why not just give me an honest and open statement?
Like what you asked of me from an early age.
Was it to minimise the ache?
To save face from something failed?
To create distance from the ways in which you assumed everyone would frame it?
Anyway,
That's me saying it as plainly as I can say it
About the way that you behaved then
And maybe
Just maybe
What I've said here
Will aid you in
Bringing closure to anything remaining
So that each and every day
You can pave more of your way
In coming to terms with all the hating
That you seem to linger in after waking
Apr 15, 2024
Apr 15, 2024 at 4:18 PM UTC
Hey Yalie, Diurnal Rituals Yield the Best Poetry
A Yalie jogs before dawn, her senses being exercised,
semi-aware there’s layered poetry out there and it must
be retrieved, for the eyes observe the diurnal arousing of the day,
and this too, must be recorded, part of the ordered duties of living, as the skin cells shed sweat droplets and
words of living, parcels of breathing, a diary of notations,
to educate the brain in ways and things that
professors cannot teach…
every sense operative, interactive, sound off neurotic synapses,
are acrackling, as you lay out the day ahead, calendar and
assignment checks, but the senses don’t care
about that
trivial minutiae of living
nope
the words are now coming fast and you hope your best that
you will retain, retrain the memory to savor save, those
combos of images encapsulated in new word combinations,
that are yours alone, unique, proving to no one but
yourself, that education, science et. al. is a seeded embryo &
you the valedictorian of birth commencement ceremony
so put them trainers on,
and by dawning daylight you are awondering,
now becoming a pondering, and the
question never spoke aloud but oft posed,
is this, this is,
this is why I exist,
and
my identity?
***I am an institution in my own right,
in my own write.***
Saturday Nov 4
8:01am
nyc
Nov 4, 2023
Nov 4, 2023 at 8:12 AM UTC
I dislike referring to it as my accident,
'Cause of so many reasons and losses,
I just can't stop resenting the accident.
I lost my memory & I'm still fighting,
'Cause I first had to relearn speaking,
I retrain my legs – train for balancing.
The brain injuries even made me forget how to swim,
I miss swimming elegantly for long time stretches,
It's not something anyone would usually forget.
May 26, 2019
May 26, 2019 at 7:45 AM UTC
~for SPT~
whose poems transform with lovingness
~~
*distinguishing, extinguishing,
the knowledges to retain,
reuse daily, mightily,
pleasures insights beloved,
honored with the stripes of daily use
then there are,
the knowledges to retrain,
non-removable, rising up from your
edges
of the very fine line
tween
pain and experience
they must Main Street remain,
be thankful for that,
for love regained,
needs the benchmark
of having lived love,
the loss of loss when recalled,
when new gets a turn, reinstalled,
is now twice sweeter*
Nov 1, 2015
Nov 1, 2015 at 8:19 AM UTC
Its been too long.
Too long since I've felt this...
This feeling in my chest.
In my heart no doubt.
A desire. A crave.
To be with her again.
It was only a day.
It was only a day!
This feeling now bleeds
and burns within me.
The silence is years of torture.
My fingers ache to communicate...
But I must retrain myself....
Am I insane?
Am I sick?
Perhaps...
But thing that is certain.
I want to see her again.
I want to hear her laugh.
Her smile, her presence.
Its been too long...
Feb 20, 2015
Feb 20, 2015 at 10:31 AM UTC
Be silent, retrain yourself,
Never usher out a word,
Perhaps it would be best if you were mute?
You do not want a violet reaction.
Don't need to be vibrant,
So let's just be silent, as quiet as can be.
You don't need to be as loud as a lions roar,
Its best to stay silent and hide in the back.
I am trying to keeping everything shut,
I have no talent to show,
So I shall be silent.
Not shy, but not wishing to be rude,
But is having trouble speaking up and not clamming up.
Smile and never spit out any bile,
Everything must be kept hush, hush.
No one needs to hear pointless chatter.
Its for the best,
To be the best at being silent.
Apr 4, 2017
Apr 4, 2017 at 9:14 PM UTC
I SAID I will guard my ways, lest I Sin with My Tongue* I will Retrain My Month with A Muzzle, while thy wicked are before Me* I was Mute with Silence, I Held My Peace even from Good* and My Sorrow was Stirred Up* My Heart was Hot within Me, while I was Musing, thy Fire Burned, then I Spoke with My Tongue* LORD Make Me to know my End, and what is the Measure of My Days that I may know how Frail I Am* Indeed, Thou have Made My Days as Hand-Breadths, and My ages is as Nothing before Thee* Certainly every Man at His Best State is but VaporSelah Surely every Man walks about like a Shadow, Surely they busy Themselves in Vain, thou Heaps-Up Riches, and does not know who will gather them* And now, LORD, what do I wait for.? My Hope Is In You.* Deliver Me from All My transgressions* Do not make Me thy Reproach of the Foolish* I was Mute, I did not Open My Mouth, because it was You who did it* Remove Your Plague from Me, I am Consumed by the Blow of thy Hand* When with Rebukes, You Correct Man for Iniquity, Thou make His Beauty melt away like A Moth* Surely every Man is VaporSelah Hear My Prayer O LORD* and give Ear unto My Cry, do not be Silent at My Tears* for I Am A Stranger with You* A Sojourner* as all my Fathers were* Remove Your Gaze from Me, that I may Regain Strength, before I go away and an no more IJMN*
Goodness n Mercy Shall Follow Ours All the Day Of Our Life IJM
GOD Is Our Strength
GOD Is Love
GOD With Us
GOD Bless
Blessed
Aug 7, 2015
Aug 7, 2015 at 8:14 AM UTC
Wherever I sit I die in exile From the life I never had The life of the body
Effects less than obvious And decidedly wrong Imaginary worlds breathe and stand And take a life of their own
A culture of I wish I was And an inner life to match My mind is set on the goal Though my feet stray from the path But I must retrain And find new shoes And walk away from this hell Of self-loathing doubt
Feb 11, 2011
Feb 11, 2011 at 7:06 AM UTC
The pressures are rising but also falling on my chest
I can’t get out from under the tide, I need a rest
Mistrust, miscommunications, misconstrued words send me over the top
The anger continues to build inside of me until it feels like my heads going to pop
Working it out through weights, sometimes that can help
I am losing control of everything, how do I deal with something I never felt
Money issues, past actions, future homecomings, it’s all a part of this course
Lost at sea, feeling like I am drowning, I am struggling back and forth
Can I keep my head afloat until help has arrived?
Can I retrain myself and my brain? How am I to survive?
I used to be so happy, the joker in all cases
Now there is nothing to smile about, all I see are ******* arab faces
I can’t stand these people and we are put here and cannot do anything about it
They can bomb us on the road or shoot mortars to our chu’s and we can’t do ****
I’d rather be judged by 12 then carried by 6 is something I think of everyday
But all the red tape ******** we go through, these terrorists lead the way
If you are going to send me to war, let me do my job
Come out into the sunlight and get away from the fog
You tell me to give another year of my life away to you and wear the uniform proud
I can’t even look you in the face, you’re a fake and ******** is all you allow
You send me out on missions every day and you sit there comfortable behind your desk
You come with us when there is a photo op so that you can get medals pinned on your chest
You won’t tell us when we are going home; it’s this big secret you like to hide
Think about the well being of the soldier and family, take a look down deep inside
Maybe you will find some integrity, some actions that match what you say
Maybe you can remember what it’s like to live the code of a soldier, now get out my ******* way.
Jun 12, 2010
Jun 12, 2010 at 12:45 PM UTC
James Dean died that year and Mother was in the loony bin as Father termed it but he wouldn’t take you or Joey to see her because he said There’s no point kids she sits staring at walls and talking to herself or gets abusive and comes out with the most choicest of words which I wouldn’t want you to hear and besides it’s too far for you to go on a weekend and you’d only get upset especially you Lizzie you’d be in tears before they shut the **** door of the ward and all those other drooling fools there and that was it you didn’t get to see her not a peek just what he said she did or said or didn’t say or do but you wanted so much to see her and have her touch your cheek and be home again and tuck you up in bed and tell you the stories that she used to do all sat up on the end of the bed reading from some book she had or making up stories right out of her head and you remember the time she sneaked you and Joey up some supper when Father said no you’d been bad and that you had to go to bed without any supper and be careful Christ didn’t send you to Hell and damnation but Mother brought the supper anyway and listened out in case Father came up but he never did he was too busy drinking or playing cards with the Smiths from across the fields who stank of ***** and sweat and laughed too loud and swore and smoke cheap cigarettes and so Mother’d sit on the end of the bed watching you eat and having that bright eyed look about her and that small smile she had when she thought you were happy but then she became odd and out of it and talked to people who weren’t there or went for long walks and got lost and the cops had to bring her back again and again and once she sat in the bath fully clothed saying she didn’t want Christ seeing her in **** or James Dean to touch her up with his ghostly fingers and so Father took her to see some quack who examined her and talked to her as best he could until she tried to gouge out his eyes with his pen and Father had to retrain her and hold her down on the floor until some auxiliaries from down the hospital hall came bounding in and suited her up in a jacket that tied at the back and you never saw her again after that morning with her getting into Father’s car with her dark eyes staring and two of her fingers giving an up you sign to the passing neighbours who stood open mouthed and tut-tutted and you and Joey watching the car go off and over the horizon like a crazy ship going out to sea with one lone captain and a wild eyed woman as his only crew and she looking back waving her two finger in the air at Joey and you.
Sep 29, 2013
Sep 29, 2013 at 2:41 PM UTC
Retrain the knife.
The mind it sweeps,
The velveteen,
With focals deep.
So sweet, the lay,
The houred beats.
So cut the day,
Without retreats.
Now chase your bliss,
With lust for life.
With hit and miss:
Retrain the knife.
Aug 29, 2010
Aug 29, 2010 at 7:33 PM UTC
so i ask you, sage,
in all sincerity
***sage - one who has made mistakes, and would share
the fragrance of his lesson plan, his historic failures and the knowing that fear can never be defeated but it can be
deferred and differed until lessened***
and asks,
how to put aside
a ridiculous pride...a palpable fear
***this I know -
and you yourself have answered:
when necessary, I have made my self an object of
Ridiculous -
and endured the ridicule
and loved
the laughter of the fools,
and harmonized both
for this trite
is the best they have,
know that sages have
bested fear, but never can it be defeated***
to let fly
the asking?
***start with a looking glass,
perforce speaks the truth,
and the answering machine image, undeniably,
is you.***
easy?
no.
i have found no easy thing worth doing
or loving.
i don't want ease
i want l o v e
***love - the rush of trust, the release of the unconditional sharing Can never happen till you
trust yourself to say,
I am afraid***
that i would burn bridges for
a struggle of understanding
that will keep me alive and whole
a sickening rush
worth every sacrifice.
paralyzing terror
because nothing is due me...
nothing should be expected
so nothing can be misplaced
misguided
***EVERYTHING IS DUE YOU,
ROAR WITH ANGERED FRUSTRATION,
AT YOUR FRUSTRATED REFUSAL
TO BE ANGRY AT YOURSELF.
BEAUTY INSIDE OUT AND OUTSIDE IN,
EVERYTHING IS EXPECTED, AND GIVEN
THERE IS NO HIDEY HOLE FOR YOU TO BE MISPLACED ~
BURN BRIDGES THOSE BRIDGES OF REFRAIN AND RESTRAINT!
COME OUT COME OUT WHEREVER YOU ARE!***
restraint,
restraint!!!
yes?!
yes.
that must be the answer.
for if not restraint,
then earth shaking love.
and if the earth shakes
people might get hurt.
and i might be one of them.
***restraint, restraint,
this is your refrain?
retrain, retrain,
I believe, can you not too?
believe in you,
can you not too?
hard knocks endured, loveless years, disgrace
and more to come, yes love soothes and coos
but who can love but those brave enough to
love themselves first?
but my refrain will never be restrain,
only
unbowed undefeated asking for
the more
you deserve
I drop the BASS on you in your own words:***
cast out fear and man up.
or at the very least
pretend to do those things.
then you might
have something to talk about.
Feb 13, 2014
Feb 13, 2014 at 6:56 PM UTC
Sabbath 7:31am Jan 11, 2025
<•>
For later, forecast proclaims:
snow showers for much of the day,
but in our temperate clime, rarely
do we get inches or feats of accumulation,
but it will be chill enough to turn my
heavy duty “Icer” navy coat to its
whiteout version, where the flakes
individually attach themselves to
to fat fabric for self-preservation,
displaying their distinct DNA patterns of intricate crystallization artwork on a
gallery of me…
assuredly, some will attach to eyelashes
and extruded tongue, perhaps inhaled,
in nostril and open mouth, as I employ
all my senses to retain, retrain, my brain,
to walk alongside a saltwater estuary that
welcomes every flake as a long lost son and
daughter, who has returned from its prodigal global journey around the world, to melt back into a mother’s currents embrace, returning
home to my patch of briefly occupied spatial, white palatial existence
I anticipate the taste of snow to be a
multi~flavored cone, souvenirs, accrued
while globe trotting, with hints ofAsian
spices, on a riverbed of Italian red
peppery tomato sauce, the crusty
spicy fabric of the fried chickpeas of the Middle East, the cilantro stinging of Latin continents,and pretend that my nature
wetted cheeks are so because I cry & walk alone, sadness flavored, wishing I could partake of this snowy journey repast, with you by my side, for how much better would this global travelled whirlpool repast of white ice and scented airs, tastes if it could be joyfully shared
but I am by myself,
sensibly refused companionship
by others, and my
voyaged meditation now,
well ended,
well recall,
Whitman’s Song of Myself (1) conclusion:
“**You shall not look through my eyes either, nor take things from me,
You shall listen to all sides and filter them from your self**”
join me?
Jan 11, 2025
Jan 11, 2025 at 10:57 AM UTC
Mao Tse
Sorry you misunderstood
me, I didn't mean
to mislead
Mao Tse
you can be a world leader
by setting an example
Mao Tse
how 'bout cleaning
a ***** planet
Mao Tse
I hear your plea
but, you are heading
in the wrong direction
Mao Tse
over here
we have cars
that run on water
Mao Tse
they even cost less
then pollution makers
Mao Tse
popular mechanics magazine
gave us the plan [schematic]
more than a decade ago
Mao Tse
thank you for working
overtime to save the world
Mao Tse
we love your solar panels
Mao Tse
not enough time
to retrain thinking?
Mao Tse
oil men of greed
have destroyed us again
Mao Tse
oil and water don't mix
Mao Tse
you can not die
from spilling
the power of the wind
Mao Tse
did all of your pollution maker manufacturers er,
gas guzzling ISIS supporters
really bounce back
after less than one year
Really? Mao Tse
Really?
I'm sorry you had closed
your ears
Aug 11, 2015
Aug 11, 2015 at 7:56 PM UTC
What If?
Brian never thought he would work in a call centre
When he lived in Germany he was unemployed
And while looking for a job he was forced to go
Work in a call centre and refused creating a fuss
I’m not selling insurance or loft insulation!
Put me on fork lift truck training it’s my job
Not some **** call centre 2 towns away
The stupid ***** running the training place
Offered to buy Brian a bicycle and he laughed!
You silly ******* cow retrain me on fork lifts
I need to renew my outdated licence
Not work taking calls like a fool robot
Half a decade passed and Brian
Ate his words working in a call centre!
Aug 20, 2024
Aug 20, 2024 at 10:57 PM UTC
I'm happy, I swear,
pretend to care,
Because I do,
It's what I pursue.
Life is ****** it's true,
But still it's life I pursue.
Wanting to start anew,
But you can't stop boiling a brew.
Twist my mind,
Make me kind,
Make me mean.
Let me go lean.
Treating life like a show,
Mind buried under 10ft of snow.
Because I'm expected to entertain,
Even when pain i retrain.
I'm happy I swear,
Life is never fair,
Can be drab without flair,
Will bore until you pair.
Jul 31, 2014
Jul 31, 2014 at 7:38 PM UTC
New born babies apparently spend most
Of their time doing nothing ,just being
Their parents on the other hand are likely
To be in a mad whirlwind of non-stop doing
Most of us only go into Being mode on holiday
It usually takes a few days for us to wind down
We hardly ever have the time to just be ourselves
Mindfulness is a way of redressing the imbalance
You can gently retrain your mind to accept just Being
Your mind needs to rest as well as work ,try just being
May 28, 2016
May 28, 2016 at 1:31 PM UTC
retrain your brain to really know what love is
its not about whats under your shorts but the feeeling you get
when you see them
and your stomach drops
and your world stops
and its not that theyre youre everything
but a hell of alot
*** is a yes
but gender does not matter
in my opinion, not your religion
love does not discriminate
despite that cliche
love is to anyone youd die to see happy
youd sacrifice something just to make them smile
because that makes you smile
its worthwhile
love is overwhelming and you feel wonderful and natural and free
and you feel like youre a cup being filled with soda thats about to spill over
but i dont care because thats what you mean to me
Jul 21, 2013
Jul 21, 2013 at 10:07 AM UTC
Recall the past
Refill the glass
Relive his lust
Regret his touch
Return to life
Remember strife
Regain your loss
Retrain your thoughts
Release all stress
Redeem all left
Reveal the fear...
Recall the past
Refill the glass
Remember life
Regret all strife
Regain your drink
Realize; rethink...
Recall the past
Spill out the glass
Think of his lust
Hold back his touch
Make most of life
Be rid of strife
Though full of loss
Think happy thoughts
Always battle the stress
But have some hope left
And no longer hold fear
Nov 24, 2017
Nov 24, 2017 at 7:49 AM UTC
STABILITY
What has become of you? Your missing from our homes, our families and our relationships. People are forced to work multiple jobs just to get by never mind keeping up with the Joneses. juggling the responsibilities of home and work. who is affected most by this but our children and who they become.
THANKFULNESS
Something we must remind ourselves on a daily basis that we live in a country that is free. Although there are cracks and flaws, we are blessed. We are all guilty of taking for granted all that we have and dare I say above and beyond our needs. Which seems to have become an epidemic of sorts. So lets not forget the word thankfulness and what it means.
OPEN
our hearts to those in need, not just as individuals but as a country. It could be used to describe transparency for our government. Open to new ideas and not close-minded, free of walls and obstructions and not just in the physical sense. It could mean so much more than just a sign hanging in a store front window.
POSITIVE
There's something to be said about the power of positive thinking. Sometimes it seems every word out of our mouths oozes negativity. Its a far to easy habit to fall into. We need to retrain our thought process and pay more attention to the words that we speak. I'm reminded of that old misguided saying "sticks and stones..." Words can wound or words can heal, the choice is ours.
©
Sep 24, 2019
Sep 24, 2019 at 8:57 AM UTC
In the train
on my way
to another day
Another place
But now it's time
To get to a different space
If I can do it
Here below the Montana skies
Between you and I
But sometimes I am feeling
A little lost
A little unable
To make the connection
Or maybe even the desire
Or maybe my heart has grown cold
Cold like the snow
still clinging to the grassy horizons
Maybe I need you to warm me again
Woo me again
But wondering if my heart will receive it.
Sometimes I can step in a space
And sing of your grace
But it seems like when I lost everybody
I also lost you.
#chandredewet
#journeythoughts
#amtrakempirebuilder
#6March2017
Apr 14, 2017
Apr 14, 2017 at 11:08 AM UTC
a convulsive shaking of the head
a tremble ;
it's no trouble
and i've slipped this disarray
shrugged off the character ;
an avatar i've maintained
for a dedicated period
a return to The Cunning
quake the sleeper agent
and unburden the actor
a return to Cunning
the weight is clipped
and the pouch rises to the surface
geesing the code
the dog program :
click the assignment
into a bleedable port
quake the sleeper
and unburden the act
charge up joy for the task ahead
start cleaning the toys of the trade
re load the literature
retrain your physical form ;
blessed with muscular memory
and a breathing plan
the domestic ailments of the house
are striped and packed into the guest bedroom
the body hair is shaved to minimum
the workplace is given a sick call
then all the tech is despoiled
and the signal singed out
no more Mr. civilian
snuffed
the soldier
with unmarred purpose
is gratefully reattached to physical function
and mental manner
the soldier makes channels of the streets
tags favoured places
****** in relished corners
puts out an advertisement
a secretion
seeking to rejoin his staff
of instigation
Nov 16, 2019
Nov 16, 2019 at 1:21 PM UTC