"repeate" poems
Wake up.
Think of you.
Remember you've changed.
Video games.
Avoid texting you.
Video games.
Spend money.
Feel terrible.
Video games.
Spend more money.
Text you.
Video games.
Forget to eat.
Video games.
Ponder suicide.
Day dream about death.
Video games.
Feel ******
You don't help.
Check fridge.
Drink.
Video games.
Think of you.
Drink.
Video games.
Drink.
Find my knife.
Drink.
Consider.
Drink.
Text you.
**** you.
**** me.
Drink.
Just one cut.
Think of you.
Drink.
Drink.
Drink.
Wake up.
Think of you.
Ouch.
"Just one cut."
Woops.
Text you.
You still don't care.
Drink.
Nap.
Rinse.
Repeate.
Jul 31, 2015
Jul 31, 2015 at 2:09 AM UTC
You were just standing around
waiting for me to forget my own tricks.
It's not like I was in the best state of mind
to be remembering them anyway.
I was holding my hands and bending my knees.
Swaying from side to side.
Watching a broken television from 1999.
(Wishing something good was on).
I know **** is artifical
but I still like to repeate it when you call.
I'm comfortable enough to *** infront of you,
but I'll never tell you those kinds of secrets.
My face is numb with fat
and whenever I try to talk,
my jaw breaks.
I can smell your gum with my eyes,
and it's delicious.
I'm screaming about religion
and telling you I'm gay.
Nothing is accepted,
and insults are just words without real meaning.
Sincerety isn't in the tone,
it's in the meaning.
I want my ideas to stand out
but I hate reading in italics.
Things are changing
and old feelings are fading.
Dying quietly in the corner
so as not to make a scene.
It happens to everyone
if you know what I mean.
I forgot how to write,
I forgot how to think,
I'm surprised I'm alive,
I forgot how to breathe.
May 6, 2010
May 6, 2010 at 9:55 PM UTC
another one!
another one!
another one?
YES!
these are the days that remind me of you
look where we are! standing right in front of each other
wondering if it'll ever be enough, I want it to be.
pink background that turns my eyes black, shows my skin
how to shrink close to my bones, shows my insides how to
expand and layer and peel, repeate old habits, accept all.
Say, Yes! yes always to all ways because the barriers of love
are insecurities easily torn down in the moments before sleep
and release.
I'll let you go, watch you sink
ring myself out, bring my concentration out in a wet handful of your saliva
stick my tongue out for you to catch, flap it around in a white line of purity
based around my neck: inhalations!
destruction of self-pity
here we go again!
here we go for the first time: together.
bunches of banana colored lace
you're tangled
so cute
it's stupid.
cracking my knuckles in anticipation
I want to make love in the streets
make love to myself, and make love
to people I don't know.
silence and reading
and testing and cheating
my vocabulary is reaching out across the dinner table
looking for something your laughter will reply to.
all my portals are open in your innocence
and removing age, removing space
some one who feels horrible for ignorance: silence
I'll fill those holes, create my own
so you're not alone.
problemsproblemsprob
lemsproblemspro
blemsproblem
s. blemishes,
redish and sore
soarsoresoar
so
our
truths
revealed
with the lights off
and the moon brighter than the sun
and not at all blinding, I'm howling and
you're glowing and what I would give to
have that tug kiss jump pull run and hide.
Jan 16, 2012
Jan 16, 2012 at 2:03 AM UTC
They know about my problems,
Say that it doesn't matter.
Say that they love me an will never think otherwise.
They get close.
Closer and closer.
Then they say it,
Those ******* words.
"I love you."
Those words that can tame a barbarian.
The words that can calm the storming seas.
Words of trust, acceptance, care...
"The scars don't matter. They make you beautiful"
"I'll never hurt you."
Minutes, hours, days, weeks, months.
It doesn't take long to get sick of me.
That promise. Turns into a lie.
That love turns into hate.
Then I end up alone.
Then I take the cold blade to the skin.
The next day a nice person notices.
We start to talk.
I tell them my problems.
They help me through them.
They know all my problems.
rinse, repeat.
Apr 3, 2013
Apr 3, 2013 at 5:51 PM UTC
Don't you worry, my love!
Cause I believe we'll meet!
Yes, we'll meet,
Beyond this night, beyond this sky,
We,
The two love birds'll fly...
Don't you shed these pious diamonds, my sweet!
Cause we'll again meet,
We'll meet when the moon'll be kissed by the sea,
& when the sun will go to take rest,
On his beloved, night's breast...
Don't you be gloomy, my heart!
Cause we'll meet,
In the deadly silence, & midnight's dark,
So bright will the two spirits spark...
Don't you look back again, at this separation, my dearest!
Cause this is our last separation,
& a step to make us the closest!
We'll meet when our souls will be free from all these humanly binds,
When this body & all these relations will be left behind,
When we won't have any fear,
& in land of love,
We'll be welcomed with flying colour...
Then these songs of melancholy we won't have to repeate,
& I know we'll definitely meet....
Dec 2, 2018
Dec 2, 2018 at 10:10 AM UTC
My heart is just paper mache, silver strings and georgia clay
A mass that drips and sings sad sad songs
You plucked the strings now out of tune
You said said goodbye we're done its through
So I left it on the tracks and walked away
It gave me wings and clipped them too
the feathers fall and fly to you
Jealous of the bits that float away
And the birdies say hey
gonna peck out your brains
You stupid mother ****** whatd you think
The crows they ate and now they know, my heart lies hidden and over grown
Maybe theyll take flight and eat that too
My gut it has some words for you but misery will follow suit
Something wicked always comes this way
It hit me like artillery from far away my ears still ring cant find escape in sleep its my dreams
And the birdies say hey gonna peck out your brains, you stupid mother ****** whatd you think
I break down put it on repeate cross the country break my feet always walking walking walking pain
While the sky was blue I thought of you
Sky turns red and the sun is dead
Skys now black and the moon it laughs
im just wax and Ice alive, candles melt but i survive
**** man,is all I do
But i am strong, or so im told
Not strong enough to face the feelings that i hold
I hold inside
Please hold my hand
I think i need help
Lettin go of the ******
My heart is just paper mache, silver strings and georgia clay
Lost it on the tracks
Not sure its ever comin back.
And the birdies say hey, gonna peck out your brains, you stupid mother ****** what you think?
Jan 21, 2018
Jan 21, 2018 at 11:26 AM UTC