Standing in the wind
wishing I could start agian,
but yet
I relize I can't.
I try to get up, or move, or walk,
but yet
I relize I can't.
Now they come to
terrorize me agian.
They grab me by the arm
and take me away once more.
But yet,
I dont undersand why.
They take me underground
to see their high master.
So they can decide my fate once more.
He took one look,
and smiled his evil smile,
and told the gaurds
to do the extreme to me.
I cry,scream, and try to tear my way out,
but only in my mind.
Because i relize
if I did it outloud,
I would surely die.
But yet,
something still came out
of my mouth once more.
Now the king
told them to do the extreme
plus more.
Now I've done it.
I've killed myself today.
I will not be able
to breath or live for another day.
They take me away
to where they will **** me today.
So now I wait
for my fate to come,
and start to pray.
They start to beat me,
and throw me agianst the rocks.
But I relize,
I do not feel any pain.
I feel strength growing
in my arms
and start to think
I can live another day.
But before they hit me agian,
a light shines.
It takes away
every drop of darkness
in the world.
A person comes down,
tells me to stand back,
and starts to fight
agianst them.
They flee in fright,
because of what is in their sight.
I really dont know why they ran,
but yet
I relize I didn't see the face of the man.
He turned around
and I instantly relized
this wasn't any ordinary man.
This was the lord, my savior,
the ruler of the light.
I could not beleive my sight.
He takes my hand,
and asks me to walk with him.
Then he takes me
out of here
to never go back agian.
He lifts me free,
and I am forever faithfull to him.
He takes me to his kingdom
where I am forever free.
To walk
and talk
and live worry free.
I can finally be in a greatfull peace.
I reize now,
I can finally start agian once more.

My chest pushes up and down
With the beat of every breath I take
But I'm already dead

To you I'm alive
To you I still survive
But to me I'm already dead

People tell me I'm going to hell
Only to relize I'm already there
Because I'm already dead


I'm locked up in chains
I'm push to far
Now the hole I already fall
Only to hit the bottom and relize
I'm already dead

You can't save me now you never could, only thing you can do is burry my under ur foot


6 feet under I lie
My body cold and lifeless just so you can relize
Your already dead

with every smile you do not relize what it takes out of me,
                                                       with every wod something is taken away without my concent,
with every waking up in the morning you do not relize the war it induces throughout my thriving viens, throughout my skull,
                                                         with every word you say, every word i hear from you, i crumble to pieces, yet to the eye, im perfectly fine,
                                                      with every "Are you ok?"
i crumble.
                                                          yYou do not relize how much i have screamed for you,
that now my throat is raw,
                                                      that now i cannot function as i use to or could i simply never function.


Was it all just one big delusion?

Acceptance-
It's somethng every soul craves
Though most never see it
Within our fragile days

But the few who are so lucky
Don't relize how great it is
They dont live the lives-
Lives as deadly as this

"Ohana means family and family means nobody gets left behind, but if you wanna leave, you can, ill remember you tho. I remember everyone that leaves."  -lilo and stitch

When your little you think its just a movie but then your grow up and you watch it again and you relize its has so much more meaning behind it than you thought.  I mean its real lilo and stitch is about to sisters who lost thier parents and are just trying to get by when they adopt a 'dog' and everything goes wrong and lilo almost gets taken away.. thats deep.

I can't fly without  feathers
So why are you putting me in tethers
I can't swim without fins
And still your sticking in the pins
And pulling off that little dolls limbs
Like right out of the fairytale grimms'

Your vicious as hell with that voodoo doll of twine
You made in my image so it would be mine
I constantly feel the shivers run down my spine

I don't understand why you keep me here entrapped
And leave all of our potential so untapped
Instead you think I must be kidnapped

It's trust that you're so desperately lacking
Wish you would just relize it's not me that's been slacking

The walking dead in the land of the living
Soulless eyes and hearts unforgiving
They seek to destroy
******* out your joy
Shatter your skull
Make your mind dull
Rip out your heart
That's just the start
Dead set eyes
You'll never relize
Till it's to late
Your heart they ate
Breathing remains
Nothing else the same
Now hollow of feeling
Soul was sent reeling
Some don't know
Out of them life flowed
We're all missing parts
Mostly the heart
Also gray matter
Out of mouths spatter
Growing in number
Pillage and plunder
All must be feed
Living in the land of the dead..

I can't fly without  feathers
So why are you putting me in tethers
I can't swim without fins
And still your sticking in the pins
And pulling off that little dolls limbs
Like right out of the fairytale grimms'

Your vicious as hell with that voodoo doll of twine
You made in my image so it would be mine
I constantly feel the shivers run down my spine

I don't understand why you keep me here entrapped
And leave all of our potential so untapped
Instead you think I must be kidnapped

It's trust that you're so desperately lacking
Wish you would just relize it's not me that's been slacking

Why is it in our darkest
Of times
We ask why?

Yet in the light we don't?

Is it enlightenment
Or ignorance

In the light we smile
Enjoy the moment
Embrace the happiness
And relize in the moment its the light that matters
Therefore are enlightened that that light is why

Or is it that we choose to be happy
Enjoy the moment
And Embrace the happiness while its alive
And ignoring the dark
Therefore having ignorance towards the idea of why.


But whats in the dark that makes us ask why?

Maybe enlightenment
Maybe ignorance

We relize there might be a bigger idea or meaning
Strive for knowledge
And are enlightened by the thought of why

Or maybe we ignore the happy moments
Relize its only temporary
That in the moment only matters in the moment and after its useless
Therefore choose ignorance.

Day by day
she seems happy and strong
see her by night
you'll relize youre wrong

Strong on outside
But weak within
Trying to look happy
With her small weak grin


She's goes in her room
And locks the door
She sinks down upon
Her bedroom floor


There she weeps
Trying to resist
Though streams of tears
Clenching scarred up wrists


She cant take the pressure

and so she goes

To relese bottled up pressure,

in the only way she knows


She cuts herself
But never too deep
Not enough to die
Just releasing the scream


Now looking down

she sees the blood

Feeling sick to know

whats done is done

She hates herself now
The way she feels
Now waiting for
her cuts to heal

She's hurting so bad inside
But nobody can see
No ones realized
She is me.

It was on the 182nd floor
When I first saw you and my heart
began to soar.
It wasn't long after that day
I begain to relize I would have to pay,
For the love you never deserved in the first place.
Days went by as I became broke
Looking at you I had started to sulk.
Realizing you'd never love me
like I'd loved you
All those day spent thinking of you?
And you never gave a single ****.
You watched me follow you like a dog
But i'd never envisioned you thought of me like a hog.
You're a ******* I hope you know
And I should of never went to that show,
On the 182nd floor
Where I had no idea my heart
had accually started to sore,
And I've had a realization now you're accually
a ******* *****.

When will you relize the beat of my heart silently in your hand
You hold it you own it
You can try to break try to hurt it but at this time of life I'm fully alive


I'm fully alive to sit here with you to hold your hand

I'm fully alive to show you the right way to push toward the road to success


When will you relize I don't criticize you I hurt you only to show I'm fully alive for you

It was in the summer we crashed  in a wreck of  awkward bodies.
Two drifters lost,
Togather found  a demented teenage passion.

Two junkies clean in a *****  thought.
A outcast a ***** far from labels in a rejects refuge.
Runaways stumbling in a confussed state.

We fixed only to share a sweet addiction her lips
still tatse a bitter sweet strawberry in my thoughts
erased I wonder did she ever know?

Broken wings tattred  love isnt always true.
Many can have the flesh few a womans soul.
The rain did keep a steady rythm in that abandoned car.

Tracks the needle  kisses of exceptance thirst we all
shall in time.
But that is but a watercolor  cast eternal
within the vault of my mind.

Held for moment I wonder did you fade cold.
As the epitapth  draws blood  from thought.
I can only ******* past  as you speak gentle in the harshness
of what was then a nightmare of  a love i relize now.

Sometimes  such treasure's are cast aside.
Lost souls embers of emptyness from this city.
And the backseat from which we did confide.

And if the lines did ever connect and i found you again.
fragments would recall togther it wouldnt  know
the truth of my minds lie.

I hold you in thoughts as once i did in arms.
  

I wonder  if only for a moment if you ever knew.
In the ****** up  backdrop you were the
one that knew me best.
A jokers thought addicts  in  nights gentle
dream.

Goodbye honey maybe now you can finally
the peace you so do desserve.

My past is seeking me out again
The stupidity of my past ignorance and sin

We'd stay up all night and speak of places we would roam
He moved me far away from home


He moved me away from family and friends
I didn't relize my future was growing dim

I was in love, he kept his demons well hid
If I'd just known some of the things he had did


I soon was pregnant, unable to defend
That's when the beatings begin

I would of ran but there was no where to go
So far from home with a young one in tow


My illusional happy family dissolved
A happy future from me is STILL getting robed

This drunken alcoholic fool
Was particularly cruel

Daily beatings a must
Hands around my throat in disgust

Have him arrested, out the next day
"Boy, ***** will you pay"


Years go by and three children latter
Things are much worse the punishment greater

Can't leave him now, know for a fact he will **** me
He'd bury my body deep, he'd never set me free

Then he would be raising my kids, a terrifying thought
And all of my suffering would of been for naught


One drunken and now cracked up night
He told me to go and I took flight

Raised four kinds on my own
Over 17 year and every 2 or 3 years always making his presence known

He can fill my heart with fear
I seen him today he's in my town..........his near

As my love for you seeps away,
As I lie here with nothing to say,
And all this time,it fly's by,
My heart grows smaller,and starts to die,
The vision of you,it starts to loose its touch,
My heart is big for you,
now not so much,I'm loosing love,gaining nothing,
I thought mylove for you,was acually something,
Feeling sorrow, but I cant admit it,
Here in solitude,thinking about it,
I'm not absorbing hate,
But I'm starting to believe somthing called fate.
Even though I just said all this stuff,
Im going to still love you,
but just not as such.
Bad things can happen to great friends,
for a moment their I felt as if my soul had to decend.
Now I'm feeling the letting off of sympathy,
and my soul coming to harmony,
but I still dont know why you were starting to feel,far from me.
Now as I open my eyes,
I see that nothing is intentional,
and how love can seem so non-fictional.
Love really gets to some people,
But to me it seems 2 dimensional,
Like ones real and the other is unbelieviable,
Love can control what we have,
believe it or not its decieviable.
But as I stumble on this path,
I soon began to relize that its always pleadable.
A scar on the heart, a **** on love,
And how it can cross ones heart,
And leave a cruel and happy story of true art,
From people of true parts,
That soon come together,
In the mixed emotions of bad weather.

Down  by the water

Ive been here so many times broken hearts and many old wounds that never heal.
It's so hard to admit when you hate the person you are.
When catch that dream to relize its a nightmare by design.

Why cant I just break through it why cant I just get past the demons of dessire and cleanse
myself of the sin inwhich I seem to thrive?
Honestly suicide looks better by the second.

Im losing it yet still i linger like some sad prize fighter who's
taken one to many a blow.
I yern to destroy who ive become only to find who I could actully be.
Im a man who cant seem to think past vice.
A wornout joker who's fallen this time for good.
**** this nightmare please help  ive lost befor I even began.

Burn the memory till it scars my thought **** please stop this !
Im losing yet ive grown to jaded to care.

some can say hope is beutiful maybe it is in times of when hope is your last reason for taking that last breath, or of not jumping off that bridge,
maybe it is in thoose circumstances,
but when you you hope for oh so long,
hope becomes nothing but you believeing in some pathetic idea,
and maybe when you tell someone this pathetic idea they say
" that's so normal though! how can you  hope for that?"
that's when you  know you arn't right anymore. That somethings wrong with you.
when relizing that hope for you is something the average person thinks is normal, something the avergae person feels every day.
expierences everyday.
when you relize hope, is truly some pathetic overused idea of your.
Your hope has turned into something disgusting,
when you hope for a true smile, one that you don't have to fake ,
a true laugh just once,
that is what hope does to some people. ey are at the end of their to short rope and they hope.
but you can only hope for so long.
and after you are done hoping what is left?
faking everyday for the rest of your life to fulfil someone elses idea's expectations for you?
inwhich at this point death becomes so exotic and wonderful.
and after you first think that thought, of death being the true answer,
you don't care anymore or you just start caring about EVERYTHING and every point off of a one hundred kills you,
when every inisult from him starts tearing at your flesh,
when evert thought of yours isn't "good" starts to ich ever so much more, when every glance that isn't a good one makes you feel o so ******.
death really does become your most faverable topic then, and people wonder why you are the way you are.
stop wondering and simply look at their ****** expressions,
simply listen to what they say,
simply try for them.

I can't fly without feathers
So why are you putting me in tethers
I can't swim without fins
And still your sticking in the pins
And pulling off that little dolls limbs
Like right out of the fairytale grimms'

Your vicious as hell with that voodoo doll of twine
You made in my image so it would be mine
I constantly feel the shivers run down my spine

I don't understand why you keep me here entrapped
And leave all of our potential so untapped
Instead you think I must be kidnapped

It's trust that you're so desperately lacking
Wish you would just relize it's not me that's been slacking

If you read this you smell nice
TEN FACTS ABOUT YOU
1. You smell nice
2. You are a boy/girl
4. You like food
5. You didn't realize I skiped 3
6. Your looking back at 4 and 2
7. You are smiling
9. You keep reading even though you are wasting your time
10. you didn't reliz I skipped 8
11. Your looking back again
12. You are smiling
13. You didn't relize there wAs only supposed to be 10 facts

I see you and I think without you.....

I would die,

When I look into your eyes,

I think wow,increditible, she'll never be by my side,

Im starting to relize I don't want you to wake up beside anybody or nobody,

why not beside me?

I know you've been hurt in your own way,

But Let me make it up to you by dedicating my life to you ,

not just a couple of days,

You know I am in love with you,

but aren't you the right person,

Yes, I get confused and crazy too,

But "we are ment to be of one, not friends of two..."

Can you tell me what Im supposed to think of you?

We talk enough to know eachother well,

But im afriad that our friendship, something I want to be more, is getting stell,

My poems, yes your right thier all about you,

Even the ones you asked about , the sad ones yes, I felt like my love was draining out of you,

I just can't tell if what I am feeling is what you're feeling,

When I think the way of, Hate and sorrow,

It clouds me with all sorts of fears,

But when Im around you all these bad things disappear,

I feel this connection between us,


This love, my fantasies, and trust,


We are young,but when Im with you I feel the willpower of a man,

That will fight til' last man standing,and I will be the first and last to stand,

What do you feel when your talking to me?

When you were going through the painful days,

You tried to hide it,but you already knew what I can see,

But I want you to know that my love will never fade,

You may have felt like it was the end of the world,

Let me be the one you dreamed of the prefect one,

becasue when the end of the world comes? It's just going to be me and you girl.

I want to explain more but let me explain these feelings while I have a chance with you,

I'm hoping that if you understand that someday we'll say "I do,"

Because can't no one be true to you like I do,

Your love is drowning,sinking,

And Im serching looking,

and even through these kinda bad times,

Im going to always, see you....and think....

What would I do with out you ?

The walking dead in the land of the living
Soulless eyes and hearts unforgiving
They seek to destroy
******* out your joy
Shatter your skull
Make your mind dull
Rip out your heart
That's just the start
Dead set eyes
You'll never relize
Till it's to late
Your heart they ate
Breathing remains
Nothing else the same
Now hollow of feeling
Soul was sent reeling
Some don't know
Out of them life flowed
We're all missing parts
Mostly the heart
Also gray matter
Out of mouths spatter
Growing in number
Pillage and plunder
All must be feed
Living in the land of the dead..

The walking dead in the land of the living
Soulless eyes and hearts unforgiving

They seek to destroy
******* out your joy
Shatter your skull
Make your mind dull

Rip out your heart
That's just the start
Dead set eyes
You'll never relize
Till it's to late 
Your heart they ate

Breathing remains
Nothing else the same
Now hollow of feeling
Soul was sent reeling

Some don't know
Out of them life flowed
We're all missing parts
Mostly the heart
Also gray matter
Obscenities spatter

Growing in number
Pillage and plunder
All must be fed
Living in the land of the dead..

©Pauline Morris

I look up to the sky
As my heart takes flight
Being with you just feels right

One look into your grey eyes
With your hand in mine
I don't want to think about goodbyes
I image were capable of stopping time

As the sun sets on another day with you
I sit here
Gazing at the now bright stars not sure what to do
I relize i have but one fear
And that's losing you

I image your like my own glowing star
I may not always be able to see you
But I know your never that far

I've given you my heart, and i know you wont break it
You mean more to me than I can really show
In my world a flame you have lit
Take my hand and don't let go
You may not realize yet, it may take a bit
But I love you more than you'll ever know

I sit here quietly
As the sun rises again, orange, pink and blue
I wonder idly
What to do with so many thoughts about you

With eternal sentiment i sent you a note. "Dear lover, you have my soul." Yet as i sit waiting for response, i relize i wrote the wrong girl.

Did you forget that i Claimed it.... That once i did name it.... Took a picture and framed it... Now that is dead you can blaim it .... So your heart over here... that I took out of there....I wasn't tryin to give it back.... "I love you" was supose to be fact... But know I see your eyes.... and there tell me it was lies... All of the kisses and hugs.... the laughs and the loves....were just a simple way to get what you want....took what i had and now you want to be blunt...With all the layers of hate i still have your heart....and now that your gone you relize your still missing your most important part...not your arm not your leg...not you chest or your head...not your lips or your knees...nor you lungs that can breathe... but your falling apart...cuz you dont have your heart... Yeah you got wat you want...the correct texted and the font...but the page is not ready to read...because your still missing what you need...see i hold the ink...as your all out of sync...You cant find the smile...you havent seen in a while...cuz its still in my name...the one you dont claim...I know that you need it...and that your still looking for it....its just a shame that you forgot that i have it...

You're gonna tell me
you miss me
and when I don't answer, hope
I didn't get the message
I didn't check my phone
anything, anything but the truth.

You're gonna tell me
you miss me
and when I don't answer, maybe
understand why, but more likely
wonder what's happening
after all, we worked out our problems
right?

You're gonna tell me
you miss me
and when I don't answer, know
(even though you won't relize)
exactly how I felt every single time
I tried to tell you
I love(d) you.
Remember?

As I slowly take a jagged breath, I realize I can't stand it anymore. I plung into the depths to only find despair, but when I find the bottom there is a tunnle so deep, so wide, that you feel like a mouse.I enter with as much confidence as a lion, but only half way through do I realize I have no confidence of a lion but only a mere kitten, who was just born.I continue to walk but don't know why.When I get to the end I realize it has only just began.Beyond the tunnle is the same cliff I just plungged off but then I relize it is to steep to be. When I reach to the top I find a stranger dressed in white. Behind him are two others dressed in cream and my family that has passed away. I ask where am I but he jst smiles.Why does he jst stand there and smile.Finnally he says you've been through alot but now you can relax here in pardise or you can go home and stay for awhile longer. I say I wish to go home but to return later.He says ok I will send you back. When I wake im in the hospital.I ask what happened they only say a wreck and that the ones i love are waiting for me.I just smile and they come in.

Her father walks up the stairs with a new ******* his arm and yells, "Georgia, get me and this young lady something to drink!" Georgia grabs her walking stick and fumbles her way to the kitchen.  She feels her way to the refrigerator, and opens it. She sticks her hand inside and pulls out the cold cans, with plastic over the rim. She uses her cane and feels her way into the living room where he father usually is. She holds out the can as her father takes one. “WHAT IS THIS? YOU KNOW I DONT DRINK LIGHT BEER! CANT YOU READ!?”  She cries and stares at him with pleading eyes. She replies, “No.” He throws the beer back at her and she falls and starts trying to get her stuff together. The girl with her dad laughs. “Can I try?”
Her dad looks at her face and start chuckling. Georgia picks up her stuff and starts to leave. “No no no, stay here and play a game with us.” He takes the loose change from his pocket and starts throwing them at Georgia. He gives some to his new girl and she joins in. Georgia lays on the floor and cries as the quarters bruise her side. On the stairs her friend Garry is video taping.

After about 3 minuets of them laughing, drinking and throwing Georiga’s dad said, “ Sweetie its getting late Georiga should ger her rest she has school tomorrow.”
“Your no fun.” she replied, her words mended like Emma’s.
Emma. Georiga was wondering what her friends where hearing, what they where doing, as they hid in her room. She wondered if they would still be her friend, or if they would tell the police, or would they realize what messed up piece of trash she is and treat her like they relize she should be treated.

You are Born for a reason
in a set time and place,
Yet you sit their thinking..
Why am I in this place?..

You have a past an future
An you live in the present,
That only you can change
You cant go an exchange..


You cant see yourself in
every word people say
Dont be discouraged
Were theirs a will theirs a way..

Dedicate yourself an youll find yourself
Your one of a kind, Irreplaceable..


Your never gonna know if you never try
Dont listen to the critic's they all lie..

You have to have determination
That your goals your only location,
In trying theirs no limitation
To get to your destination


You came along way from where you began, look at you now...
You survived all this..

The past made you stronger
Prepaired for situations,
What dosent **** you
Makes you stronger..

Your equipted with your secret weapon
Effectively trained for when life has its strains..

Build a foundation for you
An encourage nations..
Overcome your douts
Just eliminate them..

Your better then you think
You dont just take.up space
You help in so many ways..
But dont relize all the ways..

You are loved by more then just me
You know.you are not weak..

Get a change.of mind
A grasp of real.life..
Become the better you
An do the best you can do.