"realrawandaimple" poems
THE FOIL
He hurt me
The pain was bad
So bad it was excruciating and left me wanting to return him the favor
Even if it was at least a figment of all the pain he had caused this frail heart
So I started to scheme
I began to plot and I gave it a theme
A theme of revenge
I would reverse time, I planned
I would take him back to 1983
Where I happened at the Russian Vostok Station
I called subterfuge
Asking her to be my refuge
On this chivalry quest
I welcomed him back into my home
And did all that I had done when I had loved him
Only this time I did even more
With a burning desire his heart to freeze
This surely my pain would ease
I thought to myself
After all, that’s what he had done to mine
So I acted like all was fine
Better than it had ever been
I cooked him dinner
A three course every time
I never asked him for flowers or for a dime
I wasn't fazed when he stayed out too late
I just went about pretending to love him
And with such pretense came my fate
A fate once I came to understand I would love to hate
Days turned into weeks
And the weeks became months
It was just a game of revenge
Nothing was going to change my mind
I was a vulture, out to scavenge
Or so I presumed.
As time passed,
I didn’t have to make a conscious effort to pretend
I was slowly becoming all I was pretending to be
I gasped and fear gripped me at the realization
I was a creature of habit
Usain Bolt when it came to running in circles
Here I was back to where it all began
Back to doing that which had gotten this senseless heart broken
With every intent to please
The person whose carcass I had hoped on to feed
I was “She-lock”
I yearned for a pound of his flesh or maybe just a little more
But I had failed like I did the time before
I had become everything I was pretending to be
I had repeatedly caught myself sabotaging this mission
I waltz gleefully as I make his dinner
I find myself deserted by sleep on those nights he came home late from work
I had butterflies whenever I heard him call my name
I had lost once again
I, in desperate hope had fought another losing game
I had fallen, fallen not just so hard but this time I had fallen in too deep
How could I betray myself?
How could I let him defeat me once again?
I had fallen in love with him again
And sadly this time around, he was also stupidly in love with me.
All my plans have been trounced
I never planned to surrender but I have been shackled by the chains of love,
The only soft spot my heart has for his…
#roadtorecovery
#everythingipretendtobe
#realrawandaimple
#welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d
Oct 28, 2017
Oct 28, 2017 at 11:41 AM UTC
There is his cabana
I laid my head on his shoulder
He whispered something to me and it made me begin to wonder
Wonder why something suddenly didn't feel right
"Did you ever read "Anthills of the Savannah" he asked in his rich textured baritone voice
Jolting me outta my reverie with a tiny shudder
"Yes, but never really found it captivating"
I said
What's your take on the book I queried?
"I never really enjoyed it myself"
I knew he had a lot more he wanted to say to me cause art was always his window
I turned to catch his gaze and said "so spill"
"What?" He asked
"Oh please Harry! Miss me with the BS and tell me what's on your mind"
I only forgot his pet names when I needed to get something outta him
He heaved a sigh, certainly not one of relief
And looked away from me.
"What's wrong babe?" I asked trying hard to conceal my worry
"I'm sorry, this wasn't what I promised you when when we married"
"And I could never love another like I do you"
"What are you on about?" I asked my voice trembling barely above a whisper.
"She's carrying my baby...
I'm sorry but it happened just once and now she's carrying my baby"
"Who is she" I whimpered
Seeing as we never had a child of our own .
Everything inside of me came crumbling down
Minutes passed, the silence was too loud
Almost deafening
I tried to steady my breathing but my heart was beating so hard I feared it might break free from outta my chest.
"Harry Ese Williams! Who is she?"
This time around my voice betrayed me
And just when he was about to respond
My bestfriend walks in, our eyes locked and I knew he didn't even have to utter a word for me to know who it was he was talking about.
r3d
10:09
#roadtorecovery
#everythingipretendtobe
#realrawandaimple
#welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d
Oct 26, 2017
Oct 26, 2017 at 8:51 AM UTC
The Challenge (Day 7)
Woman,
No woe, no *****
Descendant of eve, made from man’s rib
Man of Sand, then the Creators breathe
Not the devil, not to perpetuate evil
Why do you sow discord among yours
When you have been empowered to sew hearts hate has rent with love?
Woman,
Feminine, feline
Made to create, bear fruits
Fruits that nourish
Not to poison another to perish
Woman,
When will you realise that when you tear down one of ours, we all fall down?
Woman,
You’re called;
Mother, Daughter,
Teacher, Lover, Healer, Partner
Not killer
Don’t ****** ’er
Not backstabber
Don’t Torment ‘er
Not Dementor
Don’t mock’er
Not naysayer
Don’t Hat’er
Woman,
When you sit among man and slay your sister with your tongue
Just before you let him see beneath your thong
Do you think he’d treat you as royalty when you can’t practice loyalty?
Remember just as he sat to spew venom about her
So would he with another about you.
Besides he sees you and your sister as same
This stupidity won’t change if you think you’re a saint and your sister is to blame..
Woman!
You are your sisters biggest problem
And with her lies your solution.
Nothing will work if you don’t agree to walk with her
Woman,
When you stand for one, you stand for all.
If it can happen to one, others can also take the fall.
Woman,
Stand firm so another will have the courage to stand tall.
r3d
311017
17:49
#roadtorecovery
#everythingipretendtobe
#realrawandaimple
#welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d
Oct 31, 2017
Oct 31, 2017 at 3:28 PM UTC
The Challenge (Day 6)
A gypsy she was
Constantly tipsy because
Her fantasies paused
The curse her realities had caused
****** Mary was Hersolutiongel before ***********
Devil’s cut her femgasm if she ever wanted to hit ******
Always numb
Until after a few shots of bourbon
Wild she’d turn
Haunting her preys with desire as from her touch, they burn
She leaves soon as she ****
Breathless, they lay long after she’s gone
The mystic menace she’s become
Some say, she once was Queen
Whose crown shone bright and her smile a beam
Until her king was slain by his twin
So his throne he would claim
Held down by her guards on his command
She must be his Queen was his demand
She spat on him and cursed his grave
A slap, she recieved across her face
taking her against her will to satisfy his rage
She writhed in pain
Her cries drowned in her drought of tears
He had cursed her with shame
Timid, she’d become imprisoned by fear
Months after uncontrollably she bled
So much her poker faced midwife admitted she was scared
The queen had lost her seed
With which went her appetite and sleep
One day the new king was found dead
His body missing a head
The kingdoms was filled with dread
And the queen panicked she might be silenced so she fled.
A gypsy she became
The haunted became the hunter
The best in the game
r3d
30/10/17
14:15
#roadtorecovery
#everythingipretendtobe
#realrawandaimple
#welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d
Oct 30, 2017
Oct 30, 2017 at 11:36 AM UTC