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Clenching my fist
And biting down on my teeth
Wont ease the pain..
Not even the tears i cry for everythought of regret
Wont ease the guilt and amount of regret
I hold within me
All those nights staying up late talking sinfully to you
As you would say things back
I didn't want to let you go but I'm glad I did
I'm glad she caught me...
And I'm glad it's over...
That it stopped
It was so long ago but
What Brandon said hit me...it dug deep into it all
Those sins I have committed... Guilt can't cover up.
And nothing ever will.
But knowing that I am forgiven by god,
Is the most born again fresh start feeling
And it's the most painful.
Because I don't deserve his love
Yet he shows it
And this sin I deserve to be burned for
Yet he took my pain and nailed it on the cross
So I don't have to drowned in regret...
The devil loves to pester me with guilt of it all
But I'm glad it's over
I'm glad it's stopped..
No matter how many times I get on my knees
No matter how many times I try to stop killing myself over it
It does not ease th pain
Lord forgive me
Leonard Akwo Aug 2013
My dear, do you want to know
why this stream shall never cease to flow
why this countenance shall know no smile
why in vain you realease torent of bile
for eternity shall my face tarry behind the sun
and ever shall be till this ugly scenario run
cut off from every string joint to my mind
to recall no more that gruesome day
Limbeh turned a cadavar awaiting decay
how my heart tremble while my tongue relates
the incident that turned an early widow late
the night before, cried a owl across at nightfall
grandpa beheld and discerned the mysterious call
tapped he my shoulder and opened his phangs
look beyond the pregnant night in labour pangs
waiting to birth a child as mysterious as the cry
Ekumbo! May i live not to witness that melancholic night(he sighed)
a thing unheard of in Aweh beyond countless centuries
worth plunging a kingdom into an endless misery
frightened, departed me with my ribs to my cradle to fall
holdin his words to await he upon whom the lot shall fall
so as the pregnant night did flipped
departed then this poor widow to her field
to gather bread for her fatherless kids
then in agony their lips they bit
as their eyes rained in torrent
and their sobs grew even fervent
when the fatal tiding was unleashed
a thing which feared hearts and andrenaline released
how she bent beneath a dry iroko gathering yam
in her distant and lonely farm
a branch uphigh cracked
turned she to see the source of the crack
behold a log fell on her skull
pouring out what was left of her brain- all
keeling rightward, she fell as her spirit transcended a plane beyond
a place so gray, so blund
now poor orphans, as poppies to be shared
departed they to various kins to be rared
and daily this dirge about her goes
as villagers their drum beat and lyre blow
forget not the story of the unfortunate widow
who for the door, took the window
and drank not from the spring of old age
nor for her maternal labour achieved a wage
A true life story a widow who died in such a pathetic way. The story of that incident shall ever be told through countless generations.
Ryan Jones Apr 2012
When the sunrise kisses the sky and meets the the vast canvas with fluorescent splashes of love I know it's you. When I watch the violets violently push their way through the soil searching for your light I feel as if I'm looking into a mirror. Every so often I arise from my midnight slumber and gaze upon the lifeless world and wait for the morning dew to dance against the leaves I, quietly ponder your journey, Jesus, The heart & tenderness of life who pours love over this sorrowful sphere of souls. I missed the days of your prestigious youth as you "born by a river in a lil' tent"- and we should have known then that "A change was gonna come". Before long you were walking the roads of jerusalem healing the sick, rasing the dead as beams of his fathers light fell upon his head. I missed the day John dipped his gracious head and his spirit fled into the immense depths cascading along towards the pure stream of inifinite life.  Far below your rightful place you performed the great hymm of love, blowing peaceful choruses to your orchestra of twelve, with a simple stroke of the bow. Here, There & Everywhere people of all walks of life heard about this man spreading love and bliss but I guess it just wasn't enough, as he was betrayed by a kiss. And in the night this man was moaning, in the night the ground was groaning, in the night the price was paid, yet after the night the world would be saved. So the next morning he had awoken aware of what the judge had spoken, beaten with massive blood loss, his fate to die on the cross!... So he had to die for our sins as he dangled on the cross like hair does a bobby pin. And I can Imagine upon his last breath we were given our first, an eternal quench  of our thirst. And so he had to renounce his earthly home as his spirit fled to his heavenly throne. His death was for us, for our cycle of life to continue.Even nature is englufed into his plan, just like the silent trees cradle the songbird God cradles man. Jack Kerouac spoke to me one night;glowing, illuminated prose set from the tip of his ink glaring off of the ruffled, dusty beat book and he said Ryan... "Man loves in lilly's and lives in milk and in his milk he lives in creamy emptiness"- (yeah, I hear you jack)- So I ask when will man, like a young calf feeding from his mother, draw from your word which is filled with immense light and creamy fullfilment. And this word was put here to illuminate our souls so we can rise in boundless love from the prison of doubt to the freedom of love.. Is it too late... and when the Storms sing, and floods us all will we stand there and moan, frozen in spirit?...when we see him sounding the horizon with flames in his eyes will we give him holy redemtion?.. . When the sky cracks against the dismal night, and his hand  stretched out, like it always was from the beginning, will your heart finally become welcoming?... When the world begins to tremble will we do the same and make the mistake and feel we are dismissed from the betrayal of our own kiss. I feel like we are weighed down under a tomb of ignorance and have fallen from our mothers womb, punished by doubt, that gloomy bird that strikes us with his wings and pushes us further into dark sands of eternity. Now, I am not saying that I am completely free from the ignorance...for at times I've turned the blinds on his light, in fright that I was in the wrong place  as darkness shadowed my weary face. I felt like the vulture standing over a dead carcas, thinking, maybe this doesn't belong to me, maybe I shouldn't sink my teeth into his flesh. My life was vaguely lit like the winter moon, as fear traced my every move.  I let his love be ignored, At times I would throw him a kiss into a pale ray just to say this is me, I wonder if you hear me, do you see?, your child so caught up in a crippling fear of expression, sitting here listening to the tick and the tock two sounds so prevalent to a sheep out of flock, yet all the while waiting patiently like a boat at the dock sitting here waiting for you to realease my anchor and allow this ramblin' mind to tred along the rippling waters of your spirit. Bob Dylan -  prophet of captivating thought once said: "He not busy being born is busy dying"- oh yes, I hear you Dylan and that the conductor of our life drives a slow train and he's waiting for you to drop your luggage and only then can you hear his train-a -comin'. And since that morning after listening to the rain and melancholoy sounds of John Coltrane I realized that I must acknowledge him, pursue him, and come to a resolution that he truly is a perfect being our one and only love supreme. So, I lastly say to you, beautiful lost souls of undeveloped spirit- Love is the source of your being, so unlock the chains to your sunflower- gypsy - butterfly soul and spread your wings and fly. Set yourself free from the decaying flesh of man and woman who suffer your radiant thoughts, thoughts so deeply seeped into the lamb, yet ,slaughtered like the pig in the farm-green, cool, spring wind. Never mind the words of man rather the words of the lamb.
This is a poem I just recently completed. I wrote it in 2009 with the title " Jesus Christ Revisited"- I've been working on a poem called "Soul of Man" for the past two weeks and I happen to stumble across the first mentioned poem and I fused the old poem with the poem I've been working on, and out came an entirely new poem I call : "Eternal Lamb"- Give me your ears for a few minutes. Thank you.
betterdays Oct 2016
I enter the small town coffee shop
desperate for caffiene
                           and a moment's respite

and I find it is to another era
I have come, hot and flustered

I look at the menu,
scratched in chalk on dusty board.
No artistic rendering  here
just a list of good honest food,
humble, but a smidgen dear

I order coffee, latte,
with cold milk on the side,
to which the large lady server
looks at me her head cocked to askew
and states, in a flat australian drawl,
that brings billabongs and jumbucks to mind...

Darl, I can make it tepid if ya wants,
or I cans put ya cold milk on the side
but I gotta charge ya extra..
for ya mouthful of chilled moo juice
smiling, lips thin and wide

I replied I'll still take the milk on the side
and one of those little peach cakes
if you don't mind.

She gave me a price and I complied,
thinking unto myself,
the moojuice, must originate
up on heaven's side and
cure all ills, ward off chills
and give only ....
joyous thoughts whilst one imbibes.

I sat at some old farm wifes table
worn down and grooved.
Come to town to shine in this caffiene shrine
rubbing my finger agin the edge
awaiting the latte and cold milk...
on the side....

Watching me from the prized corner table
three old dears.....
With stacked mahjong tiles, and swivelling ears

and on the floor crawling with gay abandon
two small children, in tandem,
they wandered amid the tables
on uneven floors the colour of slate,
deep dark wood, tongue  and groove...
that had seen to much walking, to much talking,
the tongues have slipped and the groove all but broken

As I await the cow to moo, the beans to grow
my heart slows a beat..I let go..
and see the joy, of a fella and a good cuppa,
two old friends caught up in a natter.
and the mahjong queens, realease the tiles
old friend and foes, in an a company of smiles

The cake comes, presented with due grace.
Two  pink half moons of light sponge
in a thin jelly and coconut case,
caught in a lover's kiss of delectable cream

and I understand now,
the cow is an angel,
a veritable dream,
to be loved and cosseted,
the moojuice... of moojuices
the mother of creams...

And now for caffiene...
well go figure...they know their beans

Refreshed and renewed I arise and I leave
but not before buying more moojuice
                                                      an­d moocream...
Genesis' May 2013
You left me alone.
to walk this path carrying your burden.
Why are you walking away?
was it something I've done?
will I be judged alone?
you never said sorry
will I ever feel the same?

REALEASE YOUR SCREAM

why should I endure this pain alone?
I now grieve for what could've been.
am I not good enough?
am I just a toy?
for your amusement?
enjoyment?


you left me alone.
to walk this path carrying your burden.
why are you running away?!
why don't you help me?!

am I  nothing?
am I just a body
for your delicate fingers to touch?
to burn your eyes across my skin?
to use me?

RELEASE YOUR SCREAM

why should I be silenced!
the guilt eats me alive
to my bones.
I am so ashamed.
WHAT HAVE I DONE!
I COULDVE STOPPED IT!
I COULDVE SAID NO!
but I didn't.
I am selfish
in it for my own pleasure.

RELEASE YOUR SCREAM

I feel the force of air rip through
my throat.
and the pain feels too good.
Understand this now.
I made a mistake.

I RELEASE THIS SCREAM
betterdays Feb 2015
SLAM down the words
like a slap of your hand
upon a wooden table

SPEAK the utterances
of your broken heart

SLAM  your anger into my face
with the fistful of furious syllables

SCREAM your defiance to the world indifferent
to the magnaminity
of your none to silent pain

SLAM down tequila shots
one, two, three,
redifing absplute clarity

SLAM  your body into
mine repeatedly
mistake realease for
ECSTASY...

SLAM  the door as you go
and leave, all the while preparing for the next girl the next show...

SLAM  me into a box, and
bury me,
my time is up, my words
are just crushed up dust....

SLAM the gates of heaven
in my face...done too much
bad to die with grace

SLAM DUNK my b'ball ****,
my whole life, just a dribbling farce

SLAM  me down to hell...
let me roast a good long time

SLAM...that now ends
this redonkulous rhyme...
Random word freeflow...
writing exercise.
SLAM..
just emma Aug 2019
I like to think of depression as a She.
She’s strong like a woman and once she has a hold of you, she stands her ground.
She’s not always there,
But when she arrives
She makes sure that you feel she’s there.
She makes you feel heavy,
It was like she never left.
She reminds me of a shadow,
Always following you,
Even in the dark - especially in the dark.
She makes you feel things,
She makes you think things,
Things that you never ever dreamed of.
But then sometimes she’s beautiful,
Gracing you with your tears.
Tears that realease all the dark you were holding onto in her shadow.
But sometimes the tears don’t stop,
Won’t stop,
And through blurred vision,
You take her hand
And follow her into the shadows.
Torin May 2016
What is it when your dying
That makes you feel so alive?
Synapses shorten
Moment lengthens
There is no time
Only right now as forever

Birth and death
It all begins and ends the same way
And you'll find that in your dreams

There is spirit
Inside of you
As a molecule
Find it
Breathe it in
Let the colors be more beautiful
This life be more meaningful
Die or be born
Dream

You burst into this place

Its always inside you
Just waiting for your realease

The central exhibit for the presence of the other in the human world
"People who would sacrifice their crispy onion rings in the name of health, deserve neither health or crispy onion rings"

-im pretty sure Ben Franklin said it
Ilya Molotov Mar 2017
nothing left this test is last
i try my best, to build my nest
i carry my own burdon
i sing my story loud and clear
i want these chains to dissapear
i practise faith, i hold my sword
the way to talk with holy word
i found a way to be myself
regardless of the pize and wealth
this who i am, a holy ghost
in your heart reflects the most
the passion of the running wolf
realease my soul to fly
over mountains to the sky
i found myself, when i lost you
goodbye my love i shall miss you
Kim Essary Oct 2018
Your presence is volcanic, your body glowing from the heat within.
As you come closer the seductive scent of your cologne intrigues my senses.
My eyes close to Invision your body with steam of your breath against my skin ,
Our bodies come together, I feel your insides roar.
Anticipating your next move as I lay beneath you, your steamy beads of hot lava flowing down your body on to mine..
The burning feel of pure satisfaction waiting to erupt,
Feeling the chills of pleasure cover my skin as my body bears it's sweet realease, like an eruption of the volcano as it prepared to unleash.
The hot lava throbs inside of me from your volcanic eruption and leaves us limp like the smouldering Ash that lay beneath us.
Jaiya Star Mar 2014
Now, you see,

It's about how you treat,
Yourself
And what you feed,
To your mind body as being.

It's freeing when you realize,
The impact
Of what you are eating,
Infact
It even effects your thinking,
Feelings and actions.

So step back and
Re-*****
Re-evaluate
Re-construct
The type of chow you ate,
And
The way you eat through the day,
One meal at a time.

Seek the way,
The peak
Of focus and power
To teach
Others to encounter
Balance,
Hour to hour
Minute to minute
Be in it to win it
And limit
The shwag,
Becuase it will drag
You down in vats
Of brown
feces.

It's time to be the smart species we are,
And start to realease these
Greasy habits,
And find the heart
And peace of mind
In this peice of mine.

Now you see.
AC Jan 2014
To the boy who broke me;
I cannot bring myself to forget
The way you cupped my face
Only to tell me
I could never be happy again
I cannot bring myself to forgive
The countless hours
Of your fingers searching me
Of your hands restricting me
Your words choking me
I cannot bring myself to accept
That this wasn't my fault
That I can choose to leave it behind
That I can start over
I cannot bring myself to put away
The memories of threats
Of fingernails digging into ribs
Of dark circled eyes from
Quiet and secret tears
I cannot bring myself to realease the pain
Of the boy that broke me
Mikayla Golden Mar 2015
I LOVE THE WAY
THE WAY YOU GRAB MY SOUL
THE WAY YOU RIP IT OUT OF ME WITH A SINGLE SWIPE
GIVING ME PAIN YOU DON'T NOTICE
GIVING ME PAIN UNINTENTIONALLY PAIN

THE LOVE WE SHARED
IT IS NOW BROKEN
BROKEN AND SHATTERED
NEVER TO BE FIXED
NEVER TO BE PUT BACK TOGETHER

YOU LOVEDTHE IDEA OF ME
I LOVED THE EXISTENCE OF YOU
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
WHAT TO DO WITHOUT YOU

THE STARS ABOVE
THE STARS THAT GLITTER
THE STARS THAT SHINE IN YOUR EYES
THEY HAVE BROUGHT ME PAIN
UNDENIABLE PAIN
PAIN THAT I CAN REALEASE

THE STARS IN YOUR EYES
THEY GLITTER AN D SHINE
THEY SHINE BRIGHT AT ME
BRIGHTER THAN THE SUN
THEY CARRY LOVE
THEY BRING ME PEACE
WITHOUT YOU I'D BE BROKEN

WHAT HAVE I DONE TO BE BUILT UP
BUT THEN BE TORN DOWN AGAIN WITHOUT WORNING

I LOOK AAWAY
WHISPERING THE WORDS NEVER SPOKEN
THE WORDS IW WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO SAY
I LOVE YOU
Michael Parish Nov 2015
I am stealing but I realease
All  silence in your cries

The loundness with out voice
mans a womens and his transgendered child

Our bonfire is a flooded river!

We tried to quit
and paid dearly
for free love.

Lived under the sea with our lungs
died to live and woke to sleep
away towards the outward inward reversal.  

Until we realized you and I came together in the middle. We parted and fused our metal.  Made islands come together easier then a boat ride.
Akira Chinen May 2016
My heart never so open
To breaking
My soul never so ready
For the taking
I am hoplessly fallen
Given to madness
Sickly in love
Dreaming
Dreaming dreams
In my every breath
In and out
Another dream
Of you
I keep falling
As I've fallen
Through time
And logic
Only madness
Crashing through
The floor
And earth
No stopping
My descent
Fallen to these dreams
Begging for realease
Break my soul
And take my heart
My life
My love
My inspiration
All yours
For the talking
tears roll down you face  when emotions start
helping you control the feelings in your heart
rolling down your face they dont make sound
just a stream of tears falling all  around

helping you realease emotions that you feel
with your broken heart tears will help you deal
and as the time goes by and all the tears have gone
you can start again with life carry on

— The End —