This coup
A new nation
Loyal dedication
Its classification
‘Species procreation’
Prevents us from facing
A human cessation
selective mutation
Gestation
Creation

It may help explaining
The reasons
Behaving
But not the foundation
Or actions
We’re basing

A simplification
is “continuation”
A checkbox
left vacant
Fulfillment
We’re chasing

We sweat
Eyes are gazing
A slight
palpitation
In need of hydration
Complete excitation
Without
hesitation
Intense stimulation
Deep urges
Heart racing
Driven
By sensations

Unbounded fixation
Pelvic
Undulations
Clothing
Perforations
Time no longer wasting
This capitulation
a Sanctification
****** gyrations
Hint of *******

The bedroom
Safe haven
For what
we are craving
Once out
and displaying
It all had been taken
Before
Feeling vacant
Freed imagination
A resuscitation
Indulged depravation

A rhythm
we’re setting
The giving and getting
Destroying
the bedding
All else I’m forgetting
Entwined
with each other
Like entangled netting
Both
on the same trip
In a unified heading

Now comes
the summation
A true
Revelation
Final
culmination
Smash all expectations
Volcanic
eruption
That lasts the duration
Loud gasp
We unlock
Filled with gratification

Part I


the plateau. the truest of them all. coast line. night spells and even controlled by the dream of meeting again. the ribbon of darker than light in your crown. No region overlooked. Third picnic table to the drive at Half Moon Bay, meet me there, decant my speech there. the table by the restroom block. While the tide is in show me your oyster garden, 3:00p.m. at half-light here in the evilest torments that have been shed.---------------door locked.  The moors. Cow herds and lymph nodes, rancorous afternoon West light and bending roads, the cliffs, a sister, the need to jump. There is nothing as serious as this. There is nothing nor no one that could ever, or would ever on this side come between. Who needs sleep or jokes or snow or rivers or bombs or to turn or be a rat or a fly or ceiling fan or a gurney or a cadaver or piece of cloth or a bed spread or a couch or a game or the flint of a lighter or the bell of a dress; the bell of your dress, yes, perhaps. Having been crushed like orange cigarette light in a pool of Spanish tongues. I feel the heave, the pull; not a yawn but a wired, thread-like twist about my core. Up around the neck it makes the first cut, through the eyes out and into the nostrils down over the left arm, on the inside of the bicep, contorting my length, feigning sleep, and then cutting over my stomach, around and around multiples of times- pulled at the hips and under the groin, across each leg and in-between each nerve, capillary, artery, hair, dot, dimple, muscle, to the toes and in-between them. Wiry dream-like and nervous nightmarish, hellacious plateaus of leapers. Penguin heads and more penguin heads. Startling torment. The evilest of the vile mind. The dance of despair: if feet contorted and bound could move. The beach off Belmont. The hills and the reasons I stared. Caveat after caveat at the heads of letters, on the heads of crowns, and the wrists, and on the palms. Being pulled and signed, and moved away so greatly and so heavily at once in a moment, that even if it were a year or a set of many months it would always be a moment too taking away to be considered an expanse, and it would be too hellacious to be presumptuous. It could only be a shadow over my right shoulder as I write the letters over and again. One after another. Internally I ask if I would even grant a convo with Keats or Yeats or Plath or Hughes? Does mine come close? Does it matter the bellies reddish and cerise giving of pain? Does it have to have many names?


"This is the only Earth," I would say with the bouquet of lilies spread out on the table. Are lilies only for funerals, I would never make or risk or wish this metaphor, even play it like the drawn out notes of a melody unwritten and un-played: my black box and latched, corner of the room saxophone. Top-floor, end of the hall two-room never-ending story, I'm the left side of the bed Chicago and I see pink walls, bathrooms, the two masonite paintings, the Chanel books, the bookshelves, the white desk, the white dresser, you on the left side of the bed in such sentimental woe, **** carpet and tilted blinds, and still the moors and the whispering in the driver's seat in afternoon pasture. Sunset, sunrise, nighttime and bike room writing in other places, apartments, rooms where I inked out fingertips, blights, and moods; nothing ever being so bleak, so eerily woe-like or stoic. Nothing has ever made me so serious.

Put it on the rib, in a t-shirt. Make it a hand and guide it up a set of two skinny legs under a short-sheeted bed in small room and literary Belmont, address included. Trash cans set out morning and night, deck-readied cigarette smoking. Sliding glass door and kitchen fright. Low-lit living room white couch, kaleidoscope, and zoetrope. Spin me right round baby right round. I am my own revenge of toxic night. Attack the skin, the soul, the eyes, the mind, and the lids. The finger lids and their tips. Rot it out. Blearing wild and deafening blow after blow: left side of the bed the both of us, whilst stirs the intrepid hate and ousts each ******* tongue I can bellow and blow.

Last resort lake note in snow bank and my river speak and forest walk. Wrapped in blocks and boxes, Christmas packaging and giant over-sized red ribbons and bows. Shall I mention the bassinet, the stroller, the yard, several rings of gold and silver, several necklaces of black and thread? I draw dagger from box, jagged ended and paper-wrapped in white and amber: lit in candle light and black room shadow-kept and sleeping partisan unforgettable forever. Do I mention Hawaii, my mother dying, invisible ligatures and the unveiling of the sweat and horror? Villainous and frightening, the breath as a bleat or heart-beat and matchstick stirring slightly every friends' woe and tantrum of their spirit.

Lobster-legged, waiting, sifting through the sea shore at the sea line, the bright tyrannosaurs in mahogany, in maple, and in twine over throw rose meadow over-looks, honey-brimming and warehouse built terrariums in the underbelly of the ravine, twist and turn: road bending, hollowing, in and out and in and out, forever, the everlasting and too fastidious driving towards; and it's but what .2 miles? I sign my name but I'll never get out. I am mocked and musing at tortoise speed. Headless while improvising. Purring at any example of continue or extremity or coolness of mind, meddling, or temptation. I rock, bellowing. Talk, sending shivers up my spine. I'm cramped, and one thousand fore-words and after words that split like a million large chunks of spit, grime, and *****; **** and more ****. I might even be standing now. I could be a candle, in England, a kingdom, in Palo Alto, a rook in St. Petersburg. Mottled by giants or sleepless nights, I could be the Eiffel Tower or the Statue of Liberty, a heated marble flower or the figure dying to be carved out. I'm veering off highways, I'm belittling myself: this heathen of the unforgettable, the bog man and bow-tied vagrant of dross falsification and dross despair. I am at the sea shore, tide-righted and tongue-tide, bilingual, and multi-inhibited by sweat, spit, quaffs of sea salt, lake water, and the like. Rotten wergild ridden- stitched of a poor man's ringworm and his tattered top hat and knee-holed trousers. I'm at the sea shore, with the cucumbers dying, the rain coming in sideways, the drifts and the sandbars twisting and turning. I'm at the sea shore with the light house bruise-bending the sweet ships of victory out backwards into the backwaters of a mislead moonlight; guitars playing, beeps disappearing, pianos swept like black coffees on green walled night clubs, arenose and eroding, grainy and distraught, bleeding and well, just bleeding.






I'm at the sea shore, the coastline calling. I've got rocks in my pockets, ******* and two lines left in the letter. I’m at the sea shore, my mouth is a ghost. I've seen nothing but darkness. I'm at the seashore, second picnic table, bench facing the squat and gobble, the tin roof and riled weir near the roadside. .2 and I'm still here with my bouquet wading and waiting. I'm at the sea shore and there's nobody here. My inches are growing shorter by the second, cold, whet by the sunset, its moon men, their heavy claws and bi-laws overthrowing and throwing me out. The thorns stick. The tyrannosaurs scream. I'm at the sea shore, plateau, left bedside to write three more letters. Sign my name and there's nobody here.

I'm at the sea shore: here are my lips, my palms (both of them facing up), here are my legs (twine and all), my torso, and my head shooting sideways. I'm at the seashore and this is my grave, this is my purposeful calotype, my hide and go seek, my show and tell, my forever. .2 and forever and never ending. I was just one dream away come and keep me. I'm at the sea shore come and see me and seam me. I'm without nothing, the sky has drifted, the sea is leaving, my seat is a matchbox and I'm all wound up. The snow settling, the ice box and its glory taken for granted. I'm at the sea shore and there's nobody here. The room with its white sets of furniture, the lilies, the Chanel, the masonite paintings, the bed, your ribbon of darker on light, the throw rug **** carpet, pink walled sister's room, and the couch at the top of the stairs. I'm at the sea shore, my windows opened wide, my skin thrown with threat, rhinoceri, reddish bruises bent of cerise staled sunsets. I'm at the sea shore and there's nobody here. I'm at the plateau and there isn't a single ship. There are the rocks below and I'm counting. My caveats all implored and my goodbyes written. I'm in my bed and the sleep never set in. I'm name dropping God and there's nobody there. I'm in a chair with my hands on a keyboard, listening to Danish throb-rock, horse-riding into candle light on a wicked wedding of wild words and teary-eyed gazes and gazers. Bent by the rocking and the torment, the wild and the weird, the horror and everything horrifying. There is this shadow looking over my shoulder. I'm all alone but I feel like you're here.



Part II




I wake up in Panama. The axe there. Sleeping on the floors in the guest bedroom, the floor of the garden shed, the choir closet, the rut of dirt at the end of the flower bed; just a towel, grayish-blue, alone, lawnmower at my side, and sky blue setting all around. I was a family man. No I just taste bits of dirt watching a quiet and contrary feeling of cool limestone wrap over and about my arms and my legs. Lungs battered by snapping tongues, and ancient conversations; I think it was the Malaysian Express. Mom quieted. Sister quieted. Father wept. And is still weeping. Never have I heard such horrifying and un-kindly words.-----------------------It's going to take giant steel cavernous explorations of the nose, brain cell after brain cell quartered, giant ******* quaffs of alcohol, harboring false lanterns and even worse chemicals. Inhalations and more inhalations. I'm going to need to leap, flight, drop into bodies of waters from air planes and swallow capsules of psychotropics, sedatives beyond recalcitrance. I'm requiring shock treatments and shock values. Periodic elements and galvanized steel drums. Malevolence and more malevolence. Forest walks, and why am I still in Panama. I don't want to talk, to sleep, to dream, to play stale-mating games of chess, checkers, Monopoly, or anything Risk involving. I can't sleep, eat, treaty or retreat. I'm wickeded by temptations of grandeur and threats of anomaly, widening only in proverb and swept only by opposing endeavors. Horrified, enveloped, pictured and persuaded by the evilest of haunts, spirits, and match head weeping women. I can't even open my mouth without hearing voices anymore. The colors are beginning to be enormous and I still can't swim. I couldn't drown with my ears open if I kept my nose dry and my mouth full of a plane ticket and first class beanstalk to elysian fields. It's pervasive and I'm purveyed. It's unquantifiable. It's the epitomizing and the epitome. I have my epaulets set for turbulent battles though I still can't fend off night. Speak and I might remember. Hear and it's second rite. Sea attacks, oceans roaring, lakes swallowing me whole. Grand bodies of waters and faces and arms appendages, crowns and more crowns and more crowns and more crowns and more crowns and I'm still shaking, and I'm still just a button. And I still can't sleep. And I'm still waiting.

It is night. The moon ripening, peeling back his face. Writhing. Seamed by the beauty of the nocturne, his ways made by sun, sky, and stars. Rolled and rampant. Moved across the plateau of the air, and its even and coolly majestic wanton shades of twilight. It heads off mountains, is swept as the plains of beauty, their faces in wild and feral growths. Bent and bolded, indelible and facing off Roman Empires too gladly well in inked and whet tips of bolder hands to soothe them forth.-----------Here in their grand and grandiose furnaces of the heart, whipped tails and tall fables fettered and tarnished in gold’s and lime. Here with their mothers' doting. Here with their Jimi Hendrix and poor poetry and stand-up downtrodden wergild and retardation. I don't give a ****. I could weep for the ***** if they even had hair half as fine as my own. I am real now. Limited by nothing. Served by no worship or warship. My flotilla serves tostadas at full-price. So now we have a game going.-----------------------------------------------------------­------------------------  My cowlick is not Sinatra's and it certainly doesn't beat women. As a matter of factotum and of writ and bylaw. I'm running down words more quickly than the stanza's of Longfellow. I'm moving subtexts like Eliot. I'm rampant and gaining speed. Methamphetamine and five star meats. Alfalfa and pea tendrils. Loves and the lovers I fall over and apart on. Heroes and my fortune over told and ever telling. Moving in arc light and keeping a warm glow.

the fish line caves. the shimmy and the shake. Bluegrass music and big wafting bell tones. snakes and the river, hands on the heads, through the hair; I look straight at the Pacific. I hate plastic flowers, those inanimate stems and machine-processed flesh tones. Waltzing the state divide. I am hooked on the intrepid doom of startling ego. I let it rake into my spine. It's hooves are heavy and singe and bind like manacles all over me. My first, my last, my favorite lover. I'm stalemating in the bathtub. Harnessing Crystal Lite and making rose gardens out of CD inserts and leaf covers. I'm fascinated by magic and gods. Guns and hunters. Thieving and mold, and laundry, and stereotypes, and great stereos, and boom-boxes, and the hi-fi nightlife of Chicago, roasting on a pith and meaty flame, built like a horror story five feet tall and laced with ruggedness and small needles. My skin is a chromium orchid and the grizzly subtext of a Nick Cave tune. I've allowed myself to be over-amplified, to mistake in falsetto and vice versa. To writhe on the heavy metallic reverberations of an altercated palpitation. The heart is the lonely hunted. First the waterproof matchsticks, then the water, the bowie knife, crass grasses and hard-necked pitch-hitters and phony friends; for doing lunch in the park on a frozen pond, I play like I invented blonde and really none of my **** even smells like gold.--------------------- There are the tales of false worship. I heard a street vendor sell a story about Ovid that was worse than local politics. As far as intermittent and esoteric histories go I'm the king of the present, second stage act in the shadow of the sideshow. Tonight I'm greeting the characters with Vaseline. For their love of music and their love of philosophy. For their twilight choirs and their skinny women who wear black antler masks and PVC and polyurethane body suits standing in inner-city gardens chanting. For their chanting. The pacific. For the fish line caves. For the buzzing and the kazoos. For the alfalfa and the three fathers of blue, red, and yellow. For the state of the nation. But still mostly working for the state of equality, more than a room for one’s own.-------------------------------------------------------------­------"Rice milk for all of you." " Kensington and whittled spirits."
(Doppelganger enters stage left)MAN: Prism state, flash of the golden arc. Beastly flowers and teeming woodlands. Heir to the throes and heir to the throng.----------------------------------------------------------­--------------- The sheep meadow press in the house of affection. The terns on my hem or the hide in my beak; all across the steel girder and whipping ******* the windows facing out. The mystery gaze that seers the diplopic eye. Still its opening shunned. I put a cage over it and carry it like a child through Haight-Ashbury. At times I hint that I'm bored, but there is no letting of blood or rattle of hope. When you live with a risk you begin at times to identify with the routes. Above the regional converse, the two on two or the two on four. At times for reasons of sadness but usually its just exhaustion. At times before the come and go gets to you, but usually that is wrong and they get to you first. Lathering up in a small cerulean piece of sky at the end turnabout of a dirt road

There are fireworks
Everywhere.
Small & big reminders
Of everywhere we’ve been.
Above the rooftops, above our
Top lips, in tremendous fashion.
Spread far, your soul & mine.
I couldn’t imagine life
Without you.
Something out of the blue,
Loud & breathtaking.
How we’ve inspired each other
In quick rocket bursts.
If nothing else we’ve learned
That in a matter of minutes
It can all come to an end.
The way you kiss me &
The ethos of traveling souls
Finding a color to forever live in.
I’ve found a place, there are
Fireworks everywhere.
If nothing else, we’ve learned
That in a matter of minutes
it can all come to an end.
& when it does, I’ll race you
To the top & kiss you and
Every memory I have of you.
The cosmos of left over
Gunpowder & shredded paper
All combustible in our celebration.
With eyes closed,
& the sizzling palpitation of my heart.
Possibly the biggest reminder.
Whenever I see fireworks,
I think of you

one - i don't understand why saying "it's the 21st century" is somehow seen as a compensation for 20 centuries of our inhumanity, or a case of: only improvements reside in us - seems just as false to say - men can overcome angels, as stated by the first Christians... yeah, we can do miracles with technology and ultra-secular communication dynamics - discarding the existence of such beings resulted in hen parties with plastic wings and halos... what a great method to discard such being, and subsequently appropriate their features, if ever needed, but altogether unnecessary... two - that disrespecting heterosexuality aligned with the power of science has made it altogether a pointless endeavour in re-enacting the monogamous nature of swans: if we can breed the many perversions, ahem, deviations, we surely require en equal share of respect, before science undermines any deviations into an economic format of breeding pure heterosexual contingencies... three: who the hell said i was throwing anyone off a roof? i was just curious about the slack pressurising the alias big brother / grey matter dictator into teaching us language, then to later make us into a Koranic cyclops or having to sway one side, but not the other, teaching us vocabulary in school, but robbing us of a fluidity of language beyond school, in society... any rational man would say: just teach me the knuckle, the stone and the stick to express my manners... because, to be frank, i'm not into faking being civilised, just teach me to be a barbarian from the start, don't dangle the magic carrot in front of my eyes when it's a fake... teach me the barbarism you want to suppress later on in life: i'm not into being Dolly 2.3419, and an attache to a sheepdog for herding purposes to take it up the **** and shut up: because a member of Parliament did it to me aged 14; for example.

subjectivity is doubled attacked, it's not the merely rationalist
approach of an objective side of things,
i could understand tiresome efforts
Chinese politics while walking
the tourist plot on the great wall -
in a society that's seismically acknowledging
social or whatever coherence,
i find it a bit of limbo of paraphrasing
trans - or trans-physics, or the active
way to usurp metaphysics, by deviating
from thought as an activity, and more
how words are sense datum co-ordinates
that are like dictators: because it just, feels,
funny, and, offensive. ***** vocabulary,
that's what i call it... after a while you concentrate
on what ****** you off, first the educational
autocracy teaches you a vocabulary,
then come the St. Thomas' terrorists with:
you need to revise your vocabulary...
like **** that'll happen, you don't own
language, i don't own language, you're
little fascist agenda to censor such awoke
the boy that was supposed to wake Barbarossa
from his slumber with the cry: crows! crows!
a cloud of crows! funny how the eagle is a
failed emblem for empires, and the crow isn't...
mind you, the English succeeded with
an empire half-and-half: a lion and a unicorn...
i'd guess as much with a monkey and
a centaur, or at least a Cerberus - something
mythical - well, sure, the Poles are attacked
in Britain... but ever hear about the Scot
being attacked in an English village?
a Scot was attacked just the other day,
because kilts were deemed offensive...
so trans-gender is good, meta-gender is:
had a wee t'ink 'bout it...
   robots start with the pronoun use: one...
royalty start with the pronoun use: we...
                 and in between we have paranoid
they and we... and insecure you and i -
or as e. e. cummings would have it:
    *i say no world
                 can hold a you
   shall see the not
             because
  and why but
                          (who        -
true, but as much of not is entanglement
              with knots - or ought to tries -
  to not or to knot and be -
                              Shakespeare also said:
  funny how i was born neo-liberal,
millennial tattooed - and fake-left...
   i hear the right is a tsunami of focus these days,
all the generation Z are buying into
obstructing gay-marriage, and are adamant
   on not abusing pronouns - hence the current
revival in grammar school education in England -
they don't drink, i.e.: taking psychopathic gambles,
they're prone to social-media overdoses
rather than succumbing to excess ecstasy and palpitation:
i had 190 "friends"... let's just call them vantage points...
   sheered that social media sheep: only 13 left...
but at least objectivity outright says:
       subjectivity is subhuman, science taught us
that subjectivity is the fire between two flint stones,
all in all necessary - but objectivity said:
             two flints! two flints! no fire!
what attacks subjectivity is not objectivity,
it's satire... to humanise everything: good or bad,
with a standard of humour... well... telling a sad
joke to later tell the same sad joke by satirising it...
punch in a face; because there are only so number of
things that are funny in life... the English language
doesn't seem to understand that even the odd chance
of black humour, will not lift the spirits of those,
who, quiet frankly, don't want to be humoured...
the only humour left is not to provision the public
with barbaric satire, sometimes empathy will do,
because it's emphatic humour,
   it's Godot's roundabout humour: the shared experience.
laughing for the sake of laughing is
             a cry from apathy's lost interest in
being pardonably dasein - laughing at all the truthful
autobiographic desecrate is apathy's last
chance to impress: but how foul it all sounds by then...
   the western version of buddhism suddenly feels like
  a taste of pears in november: not sour, not bitter...
just maggoty foul - yucky goo
                  of a plum-shaded rouse of the skin
tinged hue after contact with knuckle and knee.
  but they attacked a ******* Scot in an English village,
because of a kilt...
                                   he knows the strand of ganging up
in hyena numbers and then the celebratory drink
of compensating conscience - they'll sooner accept
     a trans-gender dunno'h than a hot-blooded
heap of tartan - ever ask the homosexuals what
they think of St. Thomas' gospel?
              i think: too much, too early, too innocently.
and if they tell you: speak differently!
they will, i'm ****** sure they will want to
control your grammar without any specialisation -
you'll wonder: summer in Syria?
                     because as racism goes,
they attack the difference, and the difference is only
skin deep, like they did with the Afros of Kentucky,
the Kentucky Afros will spring right back,
    because the abuse was only skin deep,
therefore their soul was enlarged, and they'll
play the blues, and the jazz, and rap, and break-dance...
but if the abuse goes to the depth of soul...
in that it's soul-deep...
                                and because it's white v. white...
it will ferment, and nothing positive will come from it...
no jazz, no blues... nothing of cultural importance...
   it will be haggled in the political market
to the point where both sides will find it utterly
unbearable: and then start to sheer their skins...
        you won't get anything from this soul-deep
attack... if the holocaust is what it felt like,
            then this is a minor post-holocaust episode,
a reminder...
                          and by god, i thank god
for the fact that the Picts are involved -
                                                            whe­re to now?
O Imperium Gladstone paraphrase?
                            it will be hard to beat the unicorn -
all empires donning the eagle duly fail -
centaur and a frog? maybe next time.

you are the aftertaste of coffee.
after the jumpstart,
the palpitation,
here you are,
sadly bittersweet.

you are the persisting vision
of a falling star.
its trail of light
remain before me
even after it’s long been gone.
i’ve tried to catch it
with my feeble hands,
only to grasp nothingness.

you are the aftermath
of an earthquake,
of which i found myself
at its epicenter.
even after rebuilding,
i found
that nothing is
as it was.

you are the tune
that keeps playing
over and over again
inside my head.
i’ve being lss-ing
over your memories,
singing a song
i’m not sure
if i’ll ever hear again.

you are an aftertaste,
a persisting vision,
an aftermath,
an lss
that i wrap around myself,
holding me together,
keeping me from falling apart.

for j.e.
*100314

Do ye hear the children weeping, O my brothers,
Ere the sorrow comes with years?
They are leaning their young heads against their mothers,
And that cannot stop their tears.
The young lambs are bleating in the meadows,
The young birds are chirping in the nest,
The young fawns are playing with the shadows,
The young flowers are blowing toward the west—
But the young, young children, O my brothers,
They are weeping bitterly!
They are weeping in the playtime of the others,
In the country of the free.

Do you question the young children in their sorrow,
Why their tears are falling so?
The old man may weep for his tomorrow,
Which is lost in Long Ago;
The old tree is leafless in the forest,
The old year is ending in the frost,
The old wound, if stricken, is the sorest,
The old hope is hardest to be lost:
But the young, young children, O my brothers,
Do you ask them why they stand
Weeping sore before the bosoms of their mothers,
In our happy Fatherland?

They look up with their pale and sunken faces,
And their looks are sad to see,
For the man’s hoary anguish draws and presses
Down the cheeks of infancy;
“Your old earth,” they say, “is very dreary;
Our young feet,” they say, “are very weak!
Few paces have we taken, yet are weary—
Our grave-rest is very far to seek.
Ask the aged why they weep, and not the children,
For the outside earth is cold,
And we young ones stand without, in our bewildering,
And the graves are for the old.”

“True,” say the children, “it may happen
That we die before our time.
Little Alice died last year—her grave is shapen
Like a snowball, in the rime.
We looked into the pit prepared to take her:
Was no room for any work in the close clay!
From the sleep wherein she lieth none will wake her,
Crying ‘Get up, little Alice! it is day.’
If you listen by that grave, in sun and shower,
With your ear down, little Alice never cries;
Could we see her face, be sure we should not know her,
For the smile has time for growing in her eyes:
And merry go her moments, lulled and stilled in
The shroud by the kirk-chime.
It is good when it happens,” say the children,
“That we die before our time.”

Alas, alas, the children! They are seeking
Death in life, as best to have;
They are binding up their hearts away from breaking,
With a cerement from the grave.
Go out, children, from the mine and from the city,
Sing out, children, as the little thrushes do;
Pluck your handfuls of the meadow-cowslips pretty,
Laugh aloud, to feel your fingers let them through!
But they answer, “Are your cowslips of the meadows
Like our weeds anear the mine?
Leave us quiet in the dark of the coal-shadows,
From your pleasures fair and fine!

“For oh,” say the children, “we are weary,
And we cannot run or leap;
If we cared for any meadows, it were merely
To drop down in them and sleep.
Our knees tremble sorely in the stooping,
We fall upon our faces, trying to go;
And, underneath our heavy eyelids drooping,
The reddest flower would look as pale as snow.
For, all day, we drag our burden tiring
Through the coal-dark, underground;
Or, all day, we drive the wheels of iron
In the factories, round and round.

“For all day the wheels are droning, turning;
Their wind comes in our faces,—
Till our hearts turn, our heads with pulses burning,
And the walls turn in their places:
Turns the sky in the high window blank and reeling,
Turns the long light that drops adown the wall,
Turn the black flies that crawl along the ceiling,—
All are turning, all the day, and we with all.
And all day, the iron wheels are droning,
And sometimes we could pray,
‘O ye wheels,’ (breaking out in a mad moaning)
‘Stop! be silent for today!’ ”

Ay, be silent! Let them hear each other breathing
For a moment, mouth to mouth!
Let them touch each other’s hands, in a fresh wreathing
Of their tender human youth!
Let them feel that this cold metallic motion
Is not all the life God fashions or reveals:
Let them prove their living souls against the notion
That they live in you, or under you, O wheels!
Still, all day, the iron wheels go onward,
Grinding life down from its mark;
And the children’s souls, which God is calling sunward,
Spin on blindly in the dark.

Now tell the poor young children, O my brothers,
To look up to Him and pray;
So the blessed One, who blesseth all the others,
Will bless them another day.
They answer, “Who is God that He should hear us,
While the rushing of the iron wheels is stirred?
When we sob aloud, the human creatures near us
Pass by, hearing not, or answer not a word.
And we hear not (for the wheels in their resounding)
Strangers speaking at the door:
Is it likely God, with angels singing round Him,
Hears our weeping any more?

“Two words, indeed, of praying we remember,
And at midnight’s hour of harm,
‘Our Father,’ looking upward in the chamber,
We say softly for a charm.
We know no other words except ‘Our Father,’
And we think that, in some pause of angels’ song,
God may pluck them with the silence sweet to gather,
And hold both within His right hand which is strong.
‘Our Father!’ If He heard us, He would surely
(For they call Him good and mild)
Answer, smiling down the steep world very purely,
‘Come and rest with me, my child.’

“But, no!” say the children, weeping faster,
“He is speechless as a stone:
And they tell us, of His image is the master
Who commands us to work on.
Go to!” say the children,—”up in heaven,
Dark, wheel-like, turning clouds are all we find.
Do not mock us; grief has made us unbelieving—
We look up for God, but tears have made us blind.”
Do you hear the children weeping and disproving,
O my brothers, what ye preach?
For God’s possible is taught by His world’s loving,
And the children doubt of each.

And well may the children weep before you!
They are weary ere they run;
They have never seen the sunshine, nor the glory
Which is brighter than the sun.
They know the grief of man, without its wisdom;
They sink in man’s despair, without its calm,—
Are slaves, without the liberty in Christdom,—
Are martyrs, by the pang without the palm,—
Are worn as if with age, yet unretrievingly
The harvest of its memories cannot reap,—
Are orphans of the earthly love and heavenly.
Let them weep! let them weep!

They look up with their pale and sunken faces,
And their look is dread to see,
For they mind you of their angels in high places,
With eyes turned on Deity;—
“How long,” they say, “how long, O cruel nation,
Will you stand, to move the world, on a child’s heart,—
Stifle down with a mailed heel its palpitation,
And tread onward to your throne amid the mart?
Our blood splashes upward, O gold-heaper,
And its purple shows your path!
But the child’s sob in the silence curses deeper
Than the strong man in his wrath.”

Usually
when I get any sort of late night feelings
and decide to write
the outcome, the product
is clean,
crisp,
but most importantly,
cold.
The feelings are typically harsh;
self hatred,
self loathing,
loneliness.

But tonight, oh God tonight,
the feelings are warm.
After a self performed heart palpitation
I have concluded that I'm at risk of a heart attack.  

Hours ago I met a girl.
Tall.
The first thing that struck me was how tall she was.
Almost as tall as me,
I didn't have to avert my eyes down to meet her own.
Which was refreshing.
The next thing that I noticed was her face.
More so, the beauty held within.
The beauty held above and below her eyes.
The freckles that dotted her cheeks,
her nose,
her forehead.

Although we did not exchange numbers, only names,
my heart rate sped up to an alarming speed
when I received a call.
Checking it quicker than I normally would have,
I **** near fell out of my chair to wrangle it from my pocket.
It was only a friend calling.
Asking if I had any dope
and if he could come over.
I said no and no and goodnight.

With my heart still beating fast
and my face comfortably warm
I lay down
and looked at the roof.
Usually
the white paint makes me sick
but this time I could only see the outline of her face.
I drew in her freckles with my fingers
and created a beautiful piece of art.
Only to have it fade from my mind.
Gasping, I reached for it.
I erased all thoughts and all memories other than those of her.
For the moment that it lasted I was at ease.
While it was not true meditation I reached enlightenment.
I felt peace.

And while it still resonates in my mind and heart,
I cannot seriously believe it will last.
I beg God to let it stay.
I ask God for this one thing,
I promise him I will do no more wrong,
I will not pick up my pipe tonight
or tomorrow
or ever again.
I promise to never taste alcohol again,
if only he will let this feeling last.
That's the least he can do.
The very least.

I lied to my friend.
I have plenty of dope,
for now,
as the feelings are already leaving.

You're so dangerous with your profane paraphernalia
Your pelvis postures pandering favor
The line of your stomach embossed by the fire is like a pasture for me
So paranoid with your pacifistic lust
As you proceed to please me with your posture so slightly
And I attempt to pursue oh so politely
You make me perk up like a peacock just with one peak
You're aware of every petty palpitation you can feel just under my sleeve
You play me like a piano, so plush with your lust politics
Pandering for a pardon of my ***** talk poignancy
I part you like Pluto from your orbits serene hum
I'll pleasure you, pleasure you until you're purple like a plum
A pastimes poetises to be written with pleasing lead
You plan every move like a predator in my bed
You're polarizing, plump, and pampered like a pageant doll
Pilfering every plausible pause with a pose of voice, your moan
Seizing the post with your post - modern pompous pouncing
Prompted like Pisces to postulate your prognosis
Lifting your posterior like the pun of a phaliccy
Pillaging me like a pandemic, a plague
Something to be paraded by paganistic plauds
Your pale skin is like playwear for sins
You're pinning me plastered with the play of your grin
Such a pretty motion picture to paint in the prison of your promise

Our wilier webs
woven with the distractions of self-absorption
can come to feel
cheated if we use them
only for halfhearted games of catch
and eventual release.
He’d overlooked that part.
Then there was an obligation to prey
who so willingly strayed upon the taffy
pull of his sweet and sticky strands.
The scrunch up of their wee faces
squeaked, “We deserve
to have our glued-down expectations
met with a most gruesome expertise.”
He’d just wanted to watch them
struggle a smidge,
at first.
It was a test if this muscle the scribes
ascribe as rightly plagued by pangs
was in him
perhaps despicably defective.
With each tripper-by trapped
the examinations grew
more tortuously complex,
and when none raised even
the slightest murmur of a palpitation,
he gave the web its dripped-dry due,
at last.
“The murderous truth will out,”
they say. It did, monstrously.
Now his bound but gagless masques
are always well-attended.

The heat intensifies with my lonesome tendencies, and
I fear palpitation from innocently brushing arms with a stranger.
But when I find myself in a stranger’s bed
(or a wineshop,
a car,
a park)
the thrill is missing.
I am a stereotype, a masochistic statistic. I am becoming the 20-something-sleeping-around-to-stave-off-boredom.
I am an archetype that’s been romanticized to death.
Save the romance, it’s greed and it’s hunger and it’s pure boredom.
These men become gold. Thread after thread
of secret affairs solidify into a piece of treasure,
Like 14 karat chain necklaces that get tangled
into an unfixable knot of links and claw clasps.
I carry it in my strut and that is exciting.
My walk is confidently direct at 3 in the morning.
In the summer, when the heat is outside and not in my bed, I am unsatisfied.
Yet when the promise of romance approaches, I allow myself to make poor decisions out of fear.
So I make a different poor decision to get me through the next hour.

R.J Calzonetti


Screaming cross the skyscraper’s windbreaker tapering

Aether vapour- trailblazing ****-sapien wafers

Of machinations psychotropic doppelgängers

Aristotle throttling menagerie’s philosophically hypnotic obelisks

Mind-boggling astronomical chronological esophagus

Antioxidants phosphorus catastrophic mitochondria

Beyond anaconda onomatopoeia

Of hallucinogenic Armageddon biblical umbilical cords

Swarming northern lights of aurora borealis

The chalice a battleground of Evangelion belladonna

Metalica candelabra swallowing the monochrome Hanukkah

Of a cold winter’s eldritch disintegration photosynthesis

Of innocent infinity stretching wretched beckoning requiem

The words that fall upon my page, are really just a shallow grave

Of the dawn of nighttime in my eyes, calm upon the twilight sun

Wrong is done draped on the blood moon wraiths

Skyscraped fields dusk a hollow thud below the dunes

That thumps the consumption of our fate, fumes to glow in darkness loom

Left blind in light of day you cannot see, the little pieces silver sheen

For blinding light may fade to grey, and I will never have my way

Nightfalls on another daybreak, dawning darkness, sundown on another day

Twilight plays with sparkling haze, the sky a wildfire made ablaze in patchwork scarecrows

Who etch rainbows black as a heart of coal, sold flatlining railroads

Gold wraithlike halos of stained-glass cathedrals unreal in the fever-dream of human beings

Bleeding Elysium from the seabed of dead worlds, gourds of incorporeal cornucopias

Born orchestra morsels of sorrowful oracles predicting crucifixion of ellipsis’ antithesis


(MC) Aurora


Absonant  as my pen writes the twilight, the red swallowed on horizon and bright

As through a sea of blood under my feet and shrinking mast of my mighty ship

A shadow I make on that red snow and peep into my heart’s hollow

It’s deep as much as my pen spake of grief.

I blinded in that last light and hurled like a beast dreading the songs of holy lies

That have just pained in bright and made me grieve.

They dragged me on my wings and deplumate  me as so fallen humans

They wrenched my limbs and rive my heart out and flinger me in air and I laid forever

On the stones that dank my blood.

I wait for the troth  of  demise but betrayed as it didn’t come to detract,

I laid when the horizon grinned red on my face and poured the last ale

And brutally drank the last sip of me.



R.J Calzonetti


People are sleeping under the blankets of a tranquil streetlamp

A sunflower in the damp bed of concrete

Soon they’ll be pushing up daisies

Underneath the foundation of what I stand for

Nip the bud of the flower pedalling the root of all evil like fallen leaves

Breeding paraplegic freedom from the pollen melancholic

Anarchistic polycrystalline shapeshifters drifting vilified

Buried alive like asphalt constellations crowning metallic gallows alcoholic in my solitude

See the clouds bury the ground in half a heaven’s heartbeat

Limbo’s limitless abyss the photosynthesis of the sepulchral diablo

Revenants of redemption dancing with death

Evanescent in its bioluminescent crescent moon spooning illuminated illustrations

Of Himalayan mayhem cremated avarice of ethereal onomatopoeia unravelling catacombs in God’s palindromes

Homeopathic saplings decapitated in the dismembered September wastelands defibrillator

Invigorating the nightshade white wraiths plane-walkers of Apocrypha documenting entropy

Pent up sentience avenging the endless demigods of discombobulated proclamations nocturne graceless, octaves eldritch, evangelic

Elegant elevators to flights of staircases where the air is fragrant with the fragments of stagnant stained glass asterisks

Written gospels to masquerade hostage to the faith the man misplaced the sacred hate, the passageways of apathy apostrophe

Apartheid of serpentine survivors carving smiles on the sidewalks

Farming diamonds and their detox

Arming giants like a phoenix

Carnal nihilists with their secrets

Stardust quiet as the bleachers

Start defiant still a reject

Art discipled to our freedom

Shattered hearts pick up the pieces

Jigsaw puzzles, smothered treasons

Sow the seeds and **** the reaper

Even legions rhyme and reason

Tattered flags without a penance

Good men do not go to heaven

Buy your burden at 7-11

Your exit is the only the next entrance

Resurrection prepubescent

Asymmetric biomechanics

Anguish to be reprimanded

Megalomaniac in our sabbath

Living life is just a sentence

Psalms of seance death’s senescence

Baptize vengeance lest it ventures into heaven

Ventriloquist omniscience of rhythmic equilibrium

Earthly hurricanes reemerging insurgent as the sugarcane purgatory

Primordials metamorphosis contorting rigour Mortis oracles horoscope cloaked in cloaca hallucinations

Induced irradiated amalgamated retaliatory incorporeal chlorophyll

Born from the sorcerers' spell, the cathedral of doubt

The only darkness is within oneself, light shed within a holy shell

Isolation is a lonely hell, scythes of moonlight blight of bells

Nightingales fail to halo word of mouth

Enveloped in the clouds cast shadows hex

But resurrection cannot hide from the eyes of death

Fresh as babies breath

Rank as the body festers effigies

Bless the Nephilim the questions beck

And call for some god to collect the rest

Is there any answer?

Even growth can be a cancer

Lifeless corpses once were dancers

Devils waltz on top of canopies

Heaven’s hands have touched serenity

****** brands that crushed His enemies

Stained glass sanguine dismantled entropy

Calamity ran dry insanity dabbling in humanity

Unravelling the candy wrapper saplings of happiness

Pitch black irradiant dull edges sharpening archangels, darkness reincarnating

Blinding bioluminescent glistening abyssal rakshasa sarcophagus parting monarchies

Metamorphosis coruscating fornication immortalization Tartarean

Reverberating ****-sapien scintillating hurricanes palpitation circulating ricocheting oblivion

Shining crepuscular homunculus dully illustrious

Sunless avatars, mannequins of Abaddon stygian as fallen leaves on the breeze of Avalon Evangelion

Incarceration breeding Elysium’s jailors in the cathedral of double helixes

Bethlehem's’ new genesis of Lucifer’s crucifixion

Brighter than a fallen star

Mourning in the dark

Doppelganger apostles night stalkers of phosphorous

Pockmarked arcanum bloodstained in gravestone Salem

Where the braves’ halos dined on maelstroms alone

Heirs succeeding failures of the empty throne

Filled with nothings’ own

Brimming bound by Babylonian poems

Deus ex Machina's apocalypse coughing prophets of Samsara blossoming diabolic

Life is but a Holocaust

Death the moment God forgot

Breath the only psalm we sought

Kept within a hollow box

Shedding devils, angelic, lost

Finding metamorphosis


(MC) Aurora


A world often synonymous with beauty on the horizon,

Meet my eyes you mourned demon load the strength on thee.

Crestfallen light on your wrist burns down your girth

And you can plead, just plead your twilight sun.

Watch the dead sea swallow you in the salts of agony

And drown in the anguish, hundreds of angelic bloodsheds,

Press hold of the thumbprints on your throat, you can't roar.

Sore lugubrious melancholy aired atmosphere,

And downhearted souls dispirited dragons dragged along.

The sob grim hiding in a blue funk rusty smog choking wind,

The nyctophilliac animals howl long the cold-blooded love song

In your lungs and burn.

It's the twilight sun,

Just that twilight sun.

These Nights with lights, Lightened from cigarette filled clouds to rainstorms.
We are drowning our Inhibition to exhibitions, of a shallow madness.

Within a matter of clearance
Of transverse sunrays:
We call this morning
A day past,
A night ruled with dreams.
Flooded with traffic afflicted
Souls searching beneath empty vessels of libations
Only to unearth realizations from lost sensations.

Vagabonds patrolling streets
apparently policing their worries,
from failed inquiries of maternally adopted creeds.

Divided vision escalated arrhythmic palpitation
Deviation from a gradual calm away from calamity
Expel, Exhort-Excise, the deep-veil

A rising dawn, polluted skies reflected in these eyes,
I stare at this street lamp, flickering at-us-all.

some poems
long to be gardens
or more likely lakes

enclosed and safe
ideal for thinking
suitable for letting go

where even silence
is guarded precious
embracing yet

leaving time out
somehow a small
palpitation held

between hands

I hastily stepped out from bed to ponder over
It was bad dream and I started to find cover
It made me restless and compelled to wonder
I rubbed the eyes and regained composure however

It happens many times when you are seized with work
So many times you may trying to avoid or shirt
It does not relieve you from burden and chain of thoughts invade
The memory is fast recycling and not easily fades

It is human mind that works as super computer
It adjusts very fast and compels the situation to alter
It argues in favor and against in protective manner
It keeps hope alive and does not make chance thinner

Dreams are in fact a safe refuge or heaven
We are the king and also beautiful queen
The whole set up revolves around and make us proud
Your voice is heard clear and loud

It is replica of sound and healthy mind
We have enough space to find
We can have level field to play
It keeps you linked and do not push away

It is said that when person is gripped by fear
He may not be in position to think or shed tears
He will have no place to put his views
The dreams may provide him enough time to review

It is by product of active human psychology
Mind does not rest even if raised in bogey
It strikes back to find the reasonable solution
It will not rest until finds out with strong resolution

I think over endlessly over the state of mind
It some times cry and try to act very kind
If something wrong is done unintentionally
It will try to satisfy logic by reasons finally

It is right application at right moment
It does not disturb the normal movement
The ups and down may force to think
But the stable mind may not allow to sink

The unstable mind sometimes pushed person to brink
He may loose the power to balance and properly to think
It is progressive thoughts that come to the rescue
This is considered as positive step and may be had by only few

So the dreams are healthy sign of mental order
It takes active part and always ready at border
The slight palpitation may push it to strong action
It will be sound and positive reaction

It is always good to sleep without any tension
The mind may be occupied with lots of questions
Still it is wroth try to be worry free
It is nice idea for all of us to agree

Thunder, and Lightning decided to open up their relationship.
Invited me to join them in a Triad.

Thunder and lighting have this eternal connection,
Belong together
I love watching them dance

Perform for me impulsive without leashes
I worship the trust that requires
The loyalty, faith in each other
Flying wherever they want,
Loving loud and without boundary
Knowing this storm belongs to them.
Safety, Definition: that moment after every passionate lovers kiss.
We are worshiped as the same storm.

Now I have the oppurtunity to build intimate connections with thunder.
With lightning.

Thunder has this base drop palpitation
Our hearts twitch in time just to align
The feeling of her crushing my butterflies
With firm hands, a passionate kiss that lasts only seconds.

Lighting comes in these quick bursts
I never feel like I can look at him long enough
Bright, dangerous
Knows he could **** me in a second
If he only touched me
He will never touch me
Only dance
Never long enough
Keeps me craving more
Likes to give me that headrush
When he returns.

As for me,
I was content just worshiping them
Every second they weren't worshiped,
Wasted chances, lost time, missing puzzle peices.

I didn't expect an invitation
This chance to see them honestly
Two seperate beautiful creatures to worship
Instead of one savory storm to feel pulse through me as one dancer.
I'm just an awestruck boy staring at the sky
Lost in endless baby blue, warm off sunrays, or choosing my favorite freckles in the stars
More lovers to distract me when they are gone.

Trapped in the rabbit hole, forever a lifelong journey
To meet and greet the cards and paint the roses red.
Sipping tea from cups that look more like forks.
Where has the Hatter gone, along with his parter the Hare?
And what of Mr. Dormouse? He's gotta be in there.
The Queen of Hearts has faded away, like a palpitation.
The Cheshire cat has spent his nine, giggling in the dark.
Dare we speak of Tweedle-dum and Tweedle-dee?
They got a domestic partnership, and live forever as combs.
Then we come to the White Rabbit, who seemingly late
had to be eaten, and tasted rather great.
The most pleasing thing to my mind
Was that the flower bed, soft for chattering lilies and roses
Was now harder than fruitcake, severing their vocal chords.
Now they just stood there, silent and foreboding.
All the while, I was the hub of Wonderland.
That's what you get when an Amazon goes down the Rabbit hole.
(Inspired from Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass)

Landscape silhouettes
pirouetted off
pockmark lights in the dark;
the city shivers
in its myths and windy whispers,

Just a subtle rumble 'neath his humble feet,
heart aflutter, stuttering
palpitation structure sputtering; the lightless rain
glanced across the window brackets
of the moving train.

Silence yawned across his vapid eyes
like labored lullaby sans interlacing rhyme device -
Home, the beckoning, fulfillment's underlying premise
calling off at every stop
'til seats bowed under weight of emptiness.

Friendless in the long stretch
between conductor's breath,
fresh with mints and benevolence,
punching tickets
with a lonely sickness...

Ah, fitful sleep awaits us
past the sliding doors
and walk to familiar shores,
horizons bleak,
and nothing more.

Locomotive groans
pervade the embers of the gloam
and glitter bright,
against the clutching fingers
of this woeful night.

such is dreams of him
whispering in my thoughts

and...

this heart of mine quells,
awakening memories long
dormant

stirring...

undying love left lingering
upon upturned pout

swayed...

intoxicating thoughts stilled
in sensualities image, him

within...

those appreciative moments
of silk like fingers animated
at will

palpitation...

quicken breaths unleash;
seductive emotions, I capitulated
to his will

besotted...

memories forever immerged;
inked by hearts quill

© D A Baugh. All rights reserved

I am a creature of habit

I keep thinking wowohwowohwowohwowohwow how things CHANGE man things have changed SO much it's amazing it's incredible unbelievable overwhelming unfathomable unable to have ever predicted that here we would be hugging outside of the ADC no longer with forced smiles from clenching teeth and wicked, glassy marbles for eyes

Yet here I am still pick-pick-picking at the skin on the side of my thumb

Isn’t It Weird, I Mean Wired, I Think I Mean Weird Wait

Wait

Wait

Please

Don’tGo

Hold on, wait things haven’t changed at all, I’m thinking about the fall, thinking about the fall when the leaves were changing and so did we, permanently.  I think about the night we stayed up until the sun came up touching and talking and nearly dying one powder-filled capsule at a time.  I’m thinking about hallucinating black spiders crazy coming at me, grabbing me, surrounding me, consuming me until it seemed like there was nothing left of me at all

Except spiders, spidery veins, spidery ribs poking out from my spidery skin in every which direction with my spider tired eyes sinking into my spider tired mind

I’m thinking about another sleepless night, countless by then couldn’t remember the last time we really drifted off together into deep, peaceful rest.  We lay there at rock bottom which really turns out to be just another K hole but no amount of sticky sweet sugar will get you out.

And I took your hand in mine and said man we can’t stay like this, I looked at the spider cracks in the ceiling that matched the creases in my shaking hands and realized we changed or died.  

And I chose life.  I bent my knees and pushed up as high as I could off of the cold blacklight-lit lumpy, stained mattress on the floor we laid on because there was no other way to go but UP.

I climbed and climbed and I felt crushed beneath depression and exhaustion that latched on to my back like long-forgotten heavy backpacks full of stones and I wasn’t exactly sure who they belonged to so I carried them with me.  

The demons in my eyes started to dissolve into puddles that leaked into my lungs so I coughed them out violently night after night for weeks that seemed to stretch into years.   When my eyes managed to flutter shut for a moment I was immediately propelled into night terrors that had me screaming, crying, begging for a different life, a different night, for someone, something please save me from myself

It’s weird that that someone ended up being me

SORT OF. SORT OF is me, because I still am my own worst enemy.  I’m fighting this never ending battle in myself with myself, and I think of all these things I changed but here I am HERE I AM AGAIN listening to those same sweet whispers from under my bed, those **** demons that tell me we can just do it for a little while just to be better for a little while to not feel tired lets get wired **** everything lets get high

I’ve grinded out the sharpness of my teeth, just like I’ve grinded out the sharpness of my words, and grinded out the sharpness of the dark contrast against the images of memories of artificial sunshine happiness in my mind, my dopamine pathways have been long hibernating but unlike predictable seasons I'm unsure of when exactly spring will come, or if the groundhog will forever fear its shadow, a demon that reminds it of speed monsters it could never overpower.  

I feel like each relapse is worse than the last, like I lose another piece of me, shave off another few years of my life one heart palpitation at a time, and each time it takes more and more to finally feel fine

But there’s so much to do and so little time, so many tears to cry and no one to care, and no matter how many friends I have how many coffees I drink how many hours I sleep there’s only one thing that really makes me feel like I’m so recklessly alive

A creature of habit, I mull these thoughts over and pick my thumbs raw.

I cannot wander away
From the eyes
The awe in them every time
We meet as if I amaze
Making me feel
Unattainable like a beautiful nun
Not to say I'm beautiful
But your breath tells me so
While the palpitation
Heard through your collarless shirt
Draws my cheek in
You hands arms body
Blanket over me
And pull me closer

My perception’s honest
as instantly you appear
in this forgotten memory
time’s not wasted on fear.

Embrace is still too early
yet to hug is far too late
for if time has taught me wisely
I know it will never wait.

Regrets seem obsolete
when I see your face
so many wasted hours
just to find this place.
Your eyes tired of worry
and your face lets wrinkles leave,
there’s no meaning to this chance
even now nothing to achieve.

Acceptance is too gentle
relief is far too strong
just somewhere in the middle
is right where we belong,
it's a welcome palpitation
that’s gone before you know,
seconds stand like hours
with not a thing to show.

A touch could spark a heartbeat,
bring life back to this soul
if I had one to begin with
you could definitely fill this hole.

But unconditional became conditional
too many echoes to excuse,
yet to judge you on that is past love
so old friend I must refuse,
the odds of meeting you here
were really a trillion to one,
it's funny you think something’s ended
to find it has only begun.

Thirty seconds to solve a riddle
this was never meant for you
I cant explain the feeling
but I know you feel it too,
left to smile together
still a million miles apart
sensing words I cant articulate
I know I wont allow to start.

A smile is all I offer
unsentimental in my grace
it's ok inside though
I always knew my place,
but that’s another lifetime
this one is simply on loan
time is yet my teacher
I‘m still a rolling stone.
In place of greater meaning
detached and self-assured
in the space of thirty seconds
I do believe that I am cured.

*Severed ties…

she breaths right down the middle.
swings low to the ache of percussion,
and palpitation.
.
she said I should have been a painter.
maybe she was right.

I hear the melody though it skips a beat each time an arrow strikes
A sweet tune your personality plays leaving me to feel so enticed
Sometimes you drain me but it's like my glass never runs out because you know how to refill
It's delicate tank that on average was a desolate wasteland with no will
Think of it as a car with a messed up engine that needs a push to start
Or one of those moments you're losing the race but you receive a golden mushroom in Mario Kart
The feeling you bring chips away at my icebox and melts its inner shell til you can see what it was protecting
The barren but hopeful ***** that destiny and love were always neglecting
I can't picture many days where my face didn't light up just because I got to be with you
I know I see you almost everyday but you're like my Pokémon, I always want to Pik-a-chu
To be honest you remind me of a nice adorable little poodle and I just want to take you home
But since you're a poodle and all dogs go to heaven it means I have an angel in my midst to change my tone
I get all bubbly inside and carefree just being around you on a daily
It's like a sigh of relief, an Hakuna Matata, the only thing that keeps me from going crazy
You're the spice that seasons my character the taste of life I've longed for
The only reason I keep this electricity flowing is because you showed up with an extension cord
Even if I wanted to I couldn't deny the emotions I've been picking up lately
I just hope I'm not the only one that feels this way because you're the most incredible young lady
That I've ever met and honestly if I had to man up and tell you the truth about what I say in my mind
Then I'd tell you I could care less whether I'm called a friend because I always think of you as my future wife in due time
The bond I feel goes deeper than any mere infatuation
It passes a barrier that leads to a deep heart palpitation
There's not a chance that I'd miss if it meant I could capture your essence but from a closer distance
In a heartbeat I'd give up a fortune if it meant I could join your resistance
Because I can't resist you it's like trying to separate Martin Luther King from his dream
Or like trying to rip apart your favorite shirt seem by seem
I know that I can't explain deeply how I truly feel
Simples words can't explain what actions can though I have a hard time trying to reveal
My emotions through my actions because my body can get a bit stiff at times
And once I'm able to each action will amount to more than just some cheap rhymes
You are a beautiful flower, a caring spirit with a delightful attitude
An intelligent individual, a dainty little ole lady who can never be devalued
I can care less what anyone has to say because beauty is in the eye of the beholder and I definitely see more than beauty both inside and out
I see things I can't explain though they drive me toward you, reel me in, have me toss and turning in excitement and salivating from my mouth
And don't worry about the pain you once felt that's a past I will never let you look back on as each day passes
It doesn't matter how you look or who you turn out to be, I love you with both your braces and your glasses ☺️
We can both get cozy, live lavishly and live with this neverending luxuriance
Me and you together, we can explore with each other and make this A Wondrous Experience

there's white ice in my ears
and I've tried to avoid this
pitter-patter palpitation for
so long, but it's here now

it's here now.

Wearing a drab dress, all white,
I see a girl child of about eight
seemingly lost, perhaps left alone to fight
her continuing wars with a callous world,
walking hurriedly all by herself along
a desolate street, that to me seems familiar
yes, it's in the part of the city, once I lived
which always was seen teeming with life
except perhaps in such mystery dreams.

Think of this, don't you in spirit live in many
different places, like hearts of lovers one cherishes
though now one hardly remembers, how
it happened and where it was or how many
different persona constitute, the 'You, you think are You'

Like a somnambulist she walks along  the tree lined street,
I was watching her through a  window set high,
as she passed a young palm laden with coconuts,
and then a strange feeling gripped me and said
"It must be she, standing in this cozy room's warmth
and isn't that I, taking faltering steps along the street,
where she has been never before and don't know
what  awaits her or any other beyond that corner"

Is she a refugee from somewhere, an orphan whom
the world has jettisoned, with nothing to look forward?
An improbable adventurer aged just eight, still
ready to stare a dark, overcast day, on it's face fearless?

I just flew out of the window and was astonished at that feat
and  the speed; who would think I could pull it off?
I flew following her as if fearing for my dear life,
as if she and I have a cryptic connection I forgot,somehow
Where is she?my heart in palpitation,I flow with the wind.

Que devant les coquins l'honnête homme soupire ;
Que l'histoire soit laide et plate ; que l'empire
Boîte avec Talleyrand ou louche avec Parieu ;
Qu'un tour d'escroc bien fait ait nom grâce de Dieu ;
Que le pape en massue ait changé sa houlette ;
Qu'on voie au Champ de Mars piaffer sous l'épaulette
Le Meurtre général, le Vol aide de camp ;
Que hors de l'Elysée un prince débusquant,
Qu'un flibustier quittant l'île de la Tortue,
Assassine, extermine, égorge, pille et tue ;
Que les bonzes chrétiens, cognant sur leur tam-tam
Hurlent devant Soufflard : Attollite portam !
Que pour claqueurs le crime ait cent journaux infâmes,
Ceux qu'à la maison d'or, sur les genoux des femmes,
Griffonnent les Romieux, le verre en main, et ceux
Que saint-Ignace inspire à des gredins crasseux ;
Qu'en ces vils tribunaux, où le regard se heurte
De Moreau de la Seine à Moreau de la Meurthe,
La justice ait reçu d'horribles horions ;
Que, sur un lit de camp, par des centurions
La loi soit violée et râle à l'agonie ;
Que cet être choisi, créé par Dieu génie,
L'homme, adore à genoux le loup fait empereur ;
Qu'en un éclat de rire abrégé par l'horreur,
Tout ce que nous voyons aujourd'hui se résume ;
Qu'Hautpoul vende son sabre et Cucheval sa plume ;
Que tous les grands bandits, en petit copiés,
Revivent ; qu'on emplisse un sénat de plats-pieds
Dont la servilité négresse et mamelouque
Eût révolté Mahmoud et lasserait Soulouque ;
Que l'or soit le seul culte, et qu'en ce temps vénal,
Coffre-fort étant Dieu, Gousset soit cardinal ;
Que la vieille Thémis ne soit plus qu'une gouine
Baisant Mandrin dans l'antre où Mongis baragouine ;
Que Montalembert bave accoudé sur l'autel ;
Que Veuillot sur Sibour crève sa poche au fiel ;
Qu'on voie aux bals de cour s'étaler des guenipes
Qui le long des trottoirs traînaient hier leurs nippes,
Beautés de lansquenet avec un profil grec ;
Que Haynau dans Brescia soit pire que Lautrec ;
Que partout, des Sept-Tours aux colonnes d'Hercule,
Napoléon, le poing sur la hanche, recule,
Car l'aigle est vieux, Essling grisonne, Marengo
À la goutte, Austerlitz est pris d'un lombago ;
Que le czar russe ait peur tout autant que le nôtre ;
Que l'ours noir et l'ours blanc tremblent l'un devant l'autre ;
Qu'avec son grand panache et sur son grand cheval
Rayonne Saint-Arnaud, ci-devant Florival,
Fort dans la pantomime et les combats à l'hache ;
Que Sodome se montre et que Paris se cache ;
Qu'Escobar et Houdin vendent le même onguent ;
Que grâce à tous ces gueux qu'on touche avec le gant,
Tout dorés au dehors, au dedans noirs de lèpres,
Courant les bals, courant les jeux, allant à vêpres,
Grâce à ces bateleurs mêlés aux scélérats,
La Saint-Barthélemy s'achève en mardi gras ;
Ô nature profonde et calme, que t'importe !
Nature, Isis voilée assise à notre porte,
Impénétrable aïeule aux regards attendris,
Vieille comme Cybèle et fraîche comme Iris,
Ce qu'on fait ici-bas s'en va devant ta face ;
À ton rayonnement toute laideur s'efface ;
Tu ne t'informes pas quel drôle ou quel tyran
Est fait premier chanoine à Saint-Jean-de-Latran ;
Décembre, les soldats ivres, les lois faussées,
Les cadavres mêlés aux bouteilles cassées,
Ne te font rien ; tu suis ton flux et ton reflux.
Quand l'homme des faubourgs s'endort et ne sait plus
Bourrer dans un fusil des balles de calibre ;
Quand le peuple français n'est plus le peuple libre ;
Quand mon esprit, fidèle au but qu'il se fixa,
Sur cette léthargie applique un vers moxa,
Toi, tu rêves ; souvent du fond des geôles sombres,
Sort, comme d'un enfer, le murmure des ombres
Que Baroche et Rouher gardent sous les barreaux,
Car ce tas de laquais est un tas de bourreaux ;
Etant les cœurs de boue, ils sont les cœurs de roche ;
Ma strophe alors se dresse, et, pour cingler Baroche,
Se taille un fouet sanglant dans Rouher écorché ;
Toi, tu ne t'émeus point ; flot sans cesse épanché,
La vie indifférente emplit toujours tes urnes ;
Tu laisses s'élever des attentats nocturnes,
Des crimes, des fureurs, de Rome mise en croix,
De Paris mis aux fers, des guets-apens des rois,
Des pièges, des serments, des toiles d'araignées,
L'orageuse clameur des âmes indignées ;
Dans ce calme où toujours tu te réfugias,
Tu laisses le fumier croupir chez Augias,
Et renaître un passé dont nous nous affranchîmes,
Et le sang rajeunir les abus cacochymes,
La France en deuil jeter son suprême soupir,
Les prostitutions chanter, et se tapir
Les lâches dans leurs trous, la taupe en ses cachettes,
Et gronder les lions, et rugir les poètes !
Ce n'est pas ton affaire à toi de t'irriter.
Tu verrais, sans frémir et sans te révolter,
Sur tes fleurs, sous tes pins, tes ifs et tes érables,
Errer le plus coquin de tous ces misérables.
Quand Troplong, le matin, ouvre un œil chassieux,
Vénus, splendeur sereine éblouissant les cieux,
Vénus, qui devrait fuir courroucée et hagarde,
N'a pas l'air de savoir que Troplong la regarde !
Tu laisserais cueillir une rose à Dupin !
Tandis que, de velours recouvrant le sapin,
L'escarpe couronné que l'Europe surveille,
Trône et guette, et qu'il a, lui parlant à l'oreille,
D'un côté Loyola, de l'autre Trestaillon,
Ton doigt au blé dans l'ombre entrouvre le sillon.
Pendant que l'horreur sort des sénats, des conclaves,
Que les États-Unis ont des marchés d'esclaves
Comme en eut Rome avant que Jésus-Christ passât,
Que l'américain libre à l'africain forçat
Met un bât, et qu'on vend des hommes pour des piastres,
Toi, tu gonfles la mer, tu fais lever les astres,
Tu courbes l'arc-en-ciel, tu remplis les buissons
D'essaims, l'air de parfums et les nids de chansons,
Tu fais dans le bois vert la toilette des roses,
Et tu fais concourir, **** des hommes moroses,
Pour des prix inconnus par les anges cueillis,
La candeur de la vierge et la blancheur du lys.
Et quand, tordant ses mains devant les turpitudes,
Le penseur douloureux fuit dans tes solitudes,
Tu lui dis : Viens ! c'est moi ! moi que rien ne corrompt !
Je t'aime ! et tu répands dans l'ombre, sur son front
Où de l'artère ardente il sent battre les ondes,
L'âcre fraîcheur de l'herbe et des feuilles profondes !
Par moments, à te voir, parmi les trahisons,
Mener paisiblement tes mois et tes saisons,
À te voir impassible et froide, quoi qu'on fasse,
Pour qui ne creuse point plus bas que la surface,
Tu sembles bien glacée, et l'on s'étonne un peu.
Quand les proscrits, martyrs du peuple, élus de Dieu,
Stoïques, dans la mort se couchent sans se plaindre,
Tu n'as l'air de songer qu'à dorer et qu'à peindre
L'aile du scarabée errant sur leurs tombeaux.
Les rois font les gibets, toi, tu fais les corbeaux.
Tu mets le même ciel sur le juste et l'injuste.
Occupée à la mouche, à la pierre, à l'arbuste,
Aux mouvements confus du vil monde animal,
Tu parais ignorer le bien comme le mal ;
Tu laisses l'homme en proie à sa misère aiguë.
Que t'importe Socrate ! et tu fais la ciguë.
Tu créas le besoin, l'instinct et l'appétit ;
Le fort mange le faible et le grand le petit,
L'ours déjeune du rat, l'autour de la colombe,
Qu'importe ! allez, naissez, fourmillez pour la tombe,
Multitudes ! vivez, tuez, faites l'amour,
Croissez ! le pré verdit, la nuit succède au jour,
L'âne brait, le cheval hennit, le taureau beugle.
Ô figure terrible, on te croirait aveugle !
Le bon et le mauvais se mêlent sous tes pas.
Dans cet immense oubli, tu ne vois même pas
Ces deux géants lointains penchés sur ton abîme,
Satan, père du mal, Caïn, père du crime !

Erreur ! erreur ! erreur ! ô géante aux cent yeux,
Tu fais un grand labeur, saint et mystérieux !
Oh ! qu'un autre que moi te blasphème, ô nature
Tandis que notre chaîne étreint notre ceinture,
Et que l'obscurité s'étend de toutes parts,
Les principes cachés, les éléments épars,
Le fleuve, le volcan à la bouche écarlate,
Le gaz qui se condense et l'air qui se dilate,
Les fluides, l'éther, le germe sourd et lent,
Sont autant d'ouvriers dans l'ombre travaillant ;
Ouvriers sans sommeil, sans fatigue, sans nombre.
Tu viens dans cette nuit, libératrice sombre !
Tout travaille, l'aimant, le bitume, le fer,
Le charbon ; pour changer en éden notre enfer,
Les forces à ta voix sortent du fond des gouffres.

Tu murmures tout bas : - Race d'Adam qui souffres,
Hommes, forçats pensants au vieux monde attachés,
Chacune de mes lois vous délivre. Cherchez ! -
Et chaque jour surgit une clarté nouvelle,
Et le penseur épie et le hasard révèle ;
Toujours le vent sema, le calcul récolta.
Ici Fulton, ici Galvani, là Volta,
Sur tes secrets profonds que chaque instant nous livre,
Rêvent ; l'homme ébloui déchiffre enfin ton livre.

D'heure en heure on découvre un peu plus d'horizon
Comme un coup de bélier au mur d'une prison,
Du genre humain qui fouille et qui creuse et qui sonde,
Chaque tâtonnement fait tressaillir le monde.
L'***** des nations s'accomplit. Passions,
Intérêts, mœurs et lois, les révolutions
Par qui le cœur humain germe et change de formes,
Paris, Londres, New-York, les continents énormes,
Ont pour lien un fil qui tremble au fond des mers.
Une force inconnue, empruntée aux éclairs,
Mêle au courant des flots le courant des idées.
La science, gonflant ses ondes débordées,
Submerge trône et sceptre, idole et potentat.
Tout va, pense, se meut, s'accroît. L'aérostat
Passe, et du haut des cieux ensemence les hommes.
Chanaan apparaît ; le voilà, nous y sommes !
L'amour succède aux pleurs et l'eau vive à la mort,
Et la bouche qui chante à la bouche qui mord.
La science, pareille aux antiques pontifes,
Attelle aux chars tonnants d'effrayants hippogriffes
Le feu souffle aux naseaux de la bête d'airain.
Le globe esclave cède à l'esprit souverain.
Partout où la terreur régnait, où marchait l'homme,
Triste et plus accablé que la bête de somme,
Traînant ses fers sanglants que l'erreur a forgés,
Partout où les carcans sortaient des préjugés,
Partout où les césars, posant le pied sur l'âme,
Etouffaient la clarté, la pensée et la flamme,
Partout où le mal sombre, étendant son réseau,
Faisait ramper le ver, tu fais naître l'oiseau !
Par degrés, lentement, on voit sous ton haleine
La liberté sortir de l'herbe de la plaine,
Des pierres du chemin, des branches des forêts,
Rayonner, convertir la science en décrets,
Du vieil univers mort briser la carapace,
Emplir le feu qui luit, l'eau qui bout, l'air qui passe,
Gronder dans le tonnerre, errer dans les torrents,
Vivre ! et tu rends le monde impossible aux tyrans !
La matière, aujourd'hui vivante, jadis morte,
Hier écrasait l'homme et maintenant l'emporte.

Le bien germe à toute heure et la joie en tout lieu.
Oh ! sois fière en ton cœur, toi qui, sous l'œil de Dieu,
Nous prodigues les dons que ton mystère épanche,
Toi qui regardes, comme une mère se penche
Pour voir naître l'enfant que son ventre a porté,
De ton flanc éternel sortir l'humanité !

Vie ! idée ! avenir bouillonnant dans les têtes !
Le progrès, reliant entre elles ses conquêtes,
Gagne un point après l'autre, et court contagieux.
De cet obscur amas de faits prodigieux
Qu'aucun regard n'embrasse et qu'aucun mot ne nomme,
Tu nais plus frissonnant que l'aigle, esprit de l'homme,
Refaisant mœurs, cités, codes, religion.
Le passé n'est que l'oeuf d'où tu sors, Légion !

Ô nature ! c'est là ta genèse sublime.
Oh ! l'éblouissement nous prend sur cette cime !
Le monde, réclamant l'essor que Dieu lui doit,
Vibre, et dès à présent, grave, attentif, le doigt
Sur la bouche, incliné sur les choses futures,
Sur la création et sur les créatures,
Une vague lueur dans son œil éclatant,
Le voyant, le savant, le philosophe entend
Dans l'avenir, déjà vivant sous ses prunelles,
La palpitation de ces millions d'ailes !

Jersey, le 23 mai 1853.

The boundaries were broken,
The lines that were crossed now left behind only lies.
This city had now shown its true color.
It’s a reminder to the depths of human misery.
I remember a scene where the smiles were sincere.
The silence that would come so surly through the safety of sleep,
Was replaced by the screams of a stranger.
A stranger who would find no solace from the icy shores.
In a world which wishes to wash away all malicious intent,
The stranger only wanted to find his own way.

Through a wilderness of wasted opportunities.
He sees beyond the surrounding walls,
Straight into the invisible summits of imagination.
Where no power can control or corrupt.
Even in a time before memory,
There was only misery.
The sun now seeps through the silver evening skies;
The foolishness of all stranded lovers
Betrayed again by meaningless ties
Stormed forth with the palpitation of the relentless sea.
Alone in his abandonment.
But Blind enough to see.
Forgotten by all hearts.
Swallowed by a pointless eternity.
Branded with the fiery red passion of a thousand burning suns.

The stranger stretched his hands towards the moon’s reflection.
Lashing out in despair
Another charade, and another man at a loss for words
He clung to his hopes, to his sanity.
It was a necessary evil
His sightless faucets of sorrow were constant proof
To his humanity
To his sincerity
The epitome of pure empathy
Every action, every circumstance,
Forged by bad intentions
Let every star still tell the tale
The distant hearts will forever burn his name
Even as the sky-tears burst upon the breathless world
Cleansing the sepultures of every broken promise
All sense of permanence will be plunged into absence
Under the scrutiny of such a sun, there is no shelter
There can only be enough hope to escape a black tomorrow.

Growing destuction from creation
Forgoing the art of appreciation
Not watching, no participation
Ignoring my own emancipation

Pulling the plug on my own demise
Ignoring the painful distant cries
Oh, how the world yearns for lies
Its honesty they will despise

Calling out for vallidation
Alienating my own nation
Walking without trepidation
Not questioning this amputation

Cutting all familiar ties
Hiding from my soul that flies
Only till the time it dies
Oh, how i would open my cold eyes

Building peace with agitation
Waiting for my cancelation
Wishing none would feel abrasion
Leaving most with palpitation

i stare at these
pages
with my glassy
dead
eyes
no connection
no palpitation
nothing that brings my heart
back to life
almost two years
and the pain is so deep
under the surface
like the memories...
i can hardly
bid them
rise

maybe this is good
and maybe i would think it was
if i could feel something
anything

My Living Nightmare

I would play my father’s favorite sonata on my family’s grand piano
While he stood watching over me-Every morning to the late afternoon.
Voices inside of mind were commanding and
As a threatening black cloud became a curtain closing before my eyes,
I yearned to retreat to that hidden world of my own.

Although the tune I played was somewhat soothing,
Firecrackers were exploding inside of my mind-
My father was the taskmaster
Vociferating his own domineering commands –
He was the devil’s advocate and the slave driver ruling my life.

Inside of my mind were deeply rooted fears
Pain stabbing my heart with every palpitation
I can still hear those voices screaming that nobody else could fathom
Piercing my brain as would shards of broken glass-
As I can still see spiders crawling across the ceiling above me.

This is my state of mind that has rudely taken over my life
As if I were driving, losing control of the steering wheel and crashing-
Schizophrenia is the name that was given to define this turmoil that contains me
As I still have memories of lying unresponsive in a hospital seclusion room
In desperation hoping to somehow appease my troubled soul.

Memories and flashbacks plague me every day and night-
As I am playing the same sonata on the grand piano of my dreams
I lost my father twenty two years ago
His absence has brought me some relief from that never ending trepidation
But I still ask myself “what is this lurid demise that has stricken me truly all about?”

I believe that demons possessed my spirit before the day I was born-
My father believed my state of mind was merely about lassitude and misbehaving-
So I would play for him that same sonata on the grand piano he so often yearned to hear-
But I still cannot comprehend what went wrong on that journey towards my birth-
Whether I look backward in time or move forward- I guess I never will.

Claudia Krizay

Pour que je t'aime, ô mon poète,
Ne fais pas fuir par trop d'ardeur
Mon amour, colombe inquiète,
Au ciel rose de la pudeur.

L'oiseau qui marche dans l'allée
S'effraye et part au moindre bruit ;
Ma passion est chose ailée
Et s'envole quand on la suit.

Muet comme l'Hermès de marbre,
Sous la charmille pose-toi ;
Tu verras bientôt de son arbre
L'oiseau descendre sans effroi.

Tes tempes sentiront près d'elles,
Avec des souffles de fraîcheur,
Une palpitation d'ailes
Dans un tourbillon de blancheur,

Et la colombe apprivoisée
Sur ton épaule s'abattra,
Et son bec à pointe rosée
De ton baiser s'enivrera.

A beauty so great, was it destiny or fate?
How the sun lays upon thou bossom of thy face, that glows glorious like the kingdom behind Heavens gate.

Your smile that run for miles in my mind during contemplation, your voice so soft, when spoken give my heart palpitation. So nervous when I get near, cant help but smile, like a soldier in the face of fear, I happily welcome these feelings, without a tear.

Roses that very from color, but your a rose beyond colors, the luminescence of your eyes and smile, glow,because of your untouched beauty has progressed beyond others.Your a simple women, smart, intelligent, intellectual beauty inner and outer, like Iv'e said before your a rose, but who's love peddles and leafs has grown strong and shown, blossomed to be prone, by love that you own.

My eyes lay upon the sight of perfection, my eyes upon you, is the sight beyond ascension.Above beyond and infinity, let me caress your neck, and taste the lips of serenity and longevity.

By: Emmanuel jv Hernandez
2-27-12

Engineers know
to build in redundancies
when lives depend
not necessarily exact replicas of the primary unit
but systems whose secondary function
is to carry the load when a primary system
fails.
          The principle applies
to all organisms and the inanimate
objects designed to support them.
But the sun
and the rock
that is earth
need no redundancies.
Burning, cooling
one
of each, they disintegrate
without feeling
for the mantle or the planets.

Some individuals
may, it turns out, be irreplaceable.
There is not always another girl singer
this one is the only one for us
at this time, while we're alive
in this place with the random weather.
The one singer, leader
the one who interprets God's words
when she is assassinated, terminated, released
we are not released, velocity
registers a mandatory, momentarily momentous
palpitation that is gone
unlike Shakespeare
so far. She
was not the sun.
But she was found
to be irreplaceable, unique
her song.

without words coming out my mouth

without sounds for you to hear.

its still beating fast,

slow,

palpitation you call it

it skips a beat,

then back together again.

can we be the ones who’ve fallen for the spaces?



can we really wait? what for?

are we actually waiting for something thats actually there?

it doesnt matter,

“nothing matters” you say

i feel it,

you feel it,

its all that matters.

near or far

real or fake

i feel you


12:55 am friday february 17, 2012