"nonfunctional" poems
I'm ruptured whole and am considered
inadequate
as my
amygdala slides through the trachea drops to my ventricles falls through the aorta plunges to my diaphragm hits the esophagus crashes to my phalanges. There is no hope.
May I hold something over your cranium?
May I remind you of your neuron imbalance? And yet
you sit and
watch as
my septum separates from the left atrium from the right ventricle from the bicuspid from the tricuspid from the pulmonary semi-lunar valve.
I love you. (Stupid cerebral cortex.)
I love you. (Imprudent Broca's area.)
I love you. (Hopeless frontal lobe.)
I love your nonfunctional mind and functional soul and
Well
this is all a metaphor for unrequited love.
Jun 1, 2014
Jun 1, 2014 at 9:41 AM UTC
What a ride this has been...
I'm exhausted and I know you are too.
I feel so drained and like I have made no difference whatsoever.
I want to get you out of the dark place you're in so bad.
It hurts to watch you sleep and have to wonder where you're at.
Baby come back to me, please, just come back.
Don't go to that place where I can't.
Don't leave baby she needs you here with her.
I'm just so tired.
I ache from the mental and physical stress.
My emotions are a huge mess.
I just want to fall into a deep slumber of peace.
I want to lay in your arms and feel safe again.
Why can't I just save you?!
Why can't I help you through all of this?
Why can't I be where you are?
I feel so nonfunctional.
I'm so tired.
I want things back the way they were.
I want the old you back.
It's like you're half alive but mostly dead.
Even in my dreams lately I can't reach you.
And the thought of losing you scares me so bad.
I have started this love thing with you.
What good is it going to do me if you're not here for it?
This is why I was so hesitant with my heart.
This is so tough and I don't know if I'm strong enough.
I didn't want to need you this much.
I didn't expect to miss your touch.
I have to get you through this.
I have to muster up all my strength and pull you out of this place.
Let me help you.
I can't watch you unravel in front of me like this.
It's like you're falling and I can't catch you.
You're barely hanging on and letting go with all your might.
When I fall you are there to pick me up so why can't I do the same for you?
I am just so confused.
Feels as if I'm spinning out of control.
I feel **** faced drunk.
I want to feel pain.
I want to hurt like you.
I want to understand the pain inside of you.
Feeling you inside me in my veins is the only cure for this ache.
You have become such a part of me and I a part of you.
When you hurt it hurts me too.
When you smile my soul lights up.
When you cry my heart weeps.
I don't know how this connection between us happened.
And words could never explain it well enough to matter.
So just come back to me where you belong.
Baby, please don't let me let you go.
Just come back into the light.
Because I am scared I can't save you
From this dark in your life.
May 19, 2014
May 19, 2014 at 2:23 PM UTC
Canavero says he can
Make of me a better man
It only will require, he said,
Smooth transposition of my head
Although success has not yet been
For those they've chopped beneath the chin
Yet in Japan it seems that that's
Not the case for a study with rats
And Doctor Canavero thinks,
That after I've met with my shrinks,
And signed the legal paper mess
My transplant'll be a big success
My head and neck?
Or just my head?
It'll be a cool trick
...If I'm not dead
Will I have a different voice?
Or will my larynx here be kept
Intact as skull is ferried forth
To donor body, where there slept...
A suicide victim in his prime
No damage done below the neck,
That pliant supple platform, I'm
Soon to inhabit...we have the tech!
For thirty some years I have been trapped
In this nonfunctional wreched form
And now a doctor, young and apt
Will attempt to weather the media storm
And try with all his godlike might
At giving me a second chance
And he believes that after the fight,
And long recovery, I'll jump and dance!
And if the plan fails miserably
And I just never ever wake
We still will have made history
I'll finally buy the farm and slake
The thirst I've had - to end it all
And leave this cursed,wretched plane
And nevermore will I forestall
For never shall I wake again!
Jan 19, 2017
Jan 19, 2017 at 7:27 AM UTC
The wind is getting in but not out. we know this because we see the curtain rise
we love our mismatched furniture
we love our scraggly hair
we love our couch with the cigarette burn in the second cushion from the right
and our ever constant stream of dishes that we wash ourselves to make our room mate smile
we love our valentine's day door hanger
we love our nonfunctional bicycle
we love our half eaten box of cookies
and our overfull incense burner
and making puns about our incense burner
we love our phonebook that we found by the door today
we love our friends
we are joyful his day
Aug 14, 2014
Aug 14, 2014 at 8:29 PM UTC
happy to nonfunctional
one eighty degrees
I go from blazing fire to
a mid-July freeze
my mind is doing fine but
my body isn't
living instability
this isn't pleasant
wearing a blindfold at the
edge of a great cliff
misstep, suddenly falling
I could use a lift
I start a day rock-solid
by the end crumbling
smiling and laughing but then
alone and trembling
Can you explain me to me?
Can you explain me to me?
Jul 24, 2015
Jul 24, 2015 at 3:09 PM UTC
quite secret
rather Moderate
so Golden-Rainbow
good, sorry, caring
sorry, caring, humane
positively ornamental
go we cosmetic, sorry, nice
rather lying ever so compassionate
all ornamental cosmetic, good, nice
compassionate! very Golden-Rainbow
positively Brave ever so ornamental
extremely secret extremely Moderate
cosmetic, good, nice, nonfunctional
cosmetic, decorative, sorry, caring
flying cosmetic, mendacious, privy
young lying Music lurching, gracefully
Bird cosmetic, esoteric, decorative, caring
lying Music, cosmetic secret, sorry tag
cosmetic, good, nice, nonfunctional Music
cosmetic, esoteric, mendacious, sorry never
mendacious, nonfunctional, benevolent lying!
cosmetic, good, nonfunctional, privy gonna
cosmetic, sorry, nice, nonfunctional could
cosmetic, good, mendacious, caring lying!
extremely gracious so gracious Brave!
positively secret so gracious secret!
very gracious all secret lying!
two that blue people man
us that deep quite in
it love fun take
if box that two
get are tail so
rock us for it
Brave us hot le
two le rock box
us red end
so man box
if red and
can all
Oct 24, 2019
Oct 24, 2019 at 2:59 AM UTC