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"involvement" poems
We prosper by our connectivity it permits us influence and involvement which invokes within us a feeling of usefulness a sense of purpose that allows us to believe, we are worthy of being beloved
0
Oct 29, 2014
Oct 29, 2014 at 9:54 AM UTC
Connected prosperity
In the question of reassurance. The single solemn response cannot always end with one that causes the most anxiety. The involvement of social media, random dm's, the arrangement of severed ties mended with one thing in mind. For these reasons insecurity deepens. Eventually things fall apart. It's not always about opening your mouth. There are other ways to be vocal. Silence becomes deafening. Defeating the purpose of awareness. Tempers quickly raise and often the things that aren't meant to be said come out. Echoing the loudest. Petty arguments, the excuses that lead us into the messages we're quick to hide. Despite how much time we've invested, the easiest thing to do is walk away. Anxiety becoming the fear that pushes us the furthest into ourselves. It's not always easy. Opening up, vocalizing a single woe that begins the journey of a thousand, if not more. If forced, we too begin to shut down and contemplate the single best thing. Being seen as selfish, self-centered. Quick burst that justifies wrongful intent with one that's right. It's all about support. Care & understanding. The saving grace that bonds the realization that either of us are perfect. That there are deeper issues at hand that seep far beyond.  the way we see ourselves, whether we are too big. Too small, the things we find often too late, said behind our back. outside of everything else do you truly understand the quality of reassurance. the equivalent to the moment everything seems to come crashing down. The times any slight movement brings us down the most. Equally we both seek the same. The response reflects the moment. To defy standard and move to something meaningful. At a point, the question deserves an answer. Going in one ear, quickly coming out the other. To vocalize seemingly in one direction unless the role is reversed
0
Jul 31, 2018
Jul 31, 2018 at 9:41 AM UTC
Situationship
In the question of reassurance. The single solemn response cannot always end with one that causes the most anxiety. The involvement of social media, random dm's, the arrangement of severed ties mended with one thing in mind. For these reasons insecurity deepens. Eventually things fall apart. It's not always about opening your mouth. There are other ways to be vocal. Silence becomes deafening. Defeating the purpose of awareness. Tempers quickly raise and often the things that aren't meant to be said come out. Echoing the loudest. Petty arguments, the excuses that lead us into the messages we're quick to hide. Despite how much time we've invested, the easiest thing to do is walk away. Anxiety becoming the fear that pushes us the furthest into ourselves. It's not always easy. Opening up, vocalizing a single woe that begins the journey of a thousand, if not more. If forced, we too begin to shut down and contemplate the single best thing. Being seen as selfish, self-centered. Quick burst that justifies wrongful intent with one that's right. It's all about support. Care & understanding. The saving grace that bonds the realization that either of us are perfect. That there are deeper issues at hand that seep far beyond.  the way we see ourselves, whether we are too big. Too small, the things we find often too late, said behind our back. outside of everything else do you truly understand the quality of reassurance. the equivalent to the moment everything seems to come crashing down. The times any slight movement brings us down the most. Equally we both seek the same. The response reflects the moment. To defy standard and move to something meaningful. At a point, the question deserves an answer. Going in one ear, quickly coming out the other. To vocalize seemingly in one direction unless the role is reversed
Continue reading...
37
Solvent and solution Kept assuaged for so long Treading in the selfishness of my subconscious state Of barely traceable memories, spurred on by the gravity of time spent At the briefest hint at past involvement Each leaf falls, eventually. Every pristine little well formed tended to. Each nurtured, cared for, parcel or idea. I can watch them for hours Watching them fall, one by one, for hours. When days start to bleed together, out of the corner of my eye, I can always see them, marking progression. Collecting in drifts, then, taken by the wind, then The rot sets in. I used to watch this. I used to find time. The roof cast me in its shadow, even standing along the banister that runs along the length Even as the final rays of sun start to vanish one at a time
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Apr 3, 2018
Apr 3, 2018 at 2:34 PM UTC
Wednesday
Suicidal tendencies, alleged attempt in 2011 (National Scholar-Athlete) Bipolar with psychotic features, meds necessary (President of student government) Anti-social features, deceptive, manipulative, lying. (Captain of varsity athletics) Qualifies as a pickup. Forfeits all rights. Police involvement if necessary. (President of an all-star rugby club) Extreme aggression. Any homicidal idealization should be taken seriously. (Trustee Scholarship to a renown private college) Narcotics abuse. Marijuana, LSD, Klonopin, ******* Alcohol, Painkillers (3.7 GPA) Masks and shields intentions. Deceptive with professionals. (Active volunteer) I advise that he be admitted to a hospital immediately (Participant in community) Drug abuse counseling, medication, extensive therapy necessary (Leader of peers) Diagnoses fly like a panhandlers love affairs Your inexact science is a disgrace to what I've created A philosophy based on your experience Ignoring the dynamic of the human condition ****** for feeling to much ****** for not feeling enough
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Nov 2, 2013
Nov 2, 2013 at 12:37 AM UTC
Alleged Dichotomy - Notes from a Doctor
You are an artifact, chiseled alabaster,        I am just molded plaster of Paris, You remain rich shiny white,       irrespective of seasonal changes, I need frequent  involvement of hands       that know their craft well, to be seen as an object of art, that barely survives,     but still brittle, would easily turn to dust. Men and women are different, inside out     I was told, I see it myself now and delighted! Over and over again I ask you to be aware of       the limitations that tie me down and forgive but you won't accept, go on with your life quietly        caring so much to keep my sinking heart buoyant.
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Jan 17, 2016
Jan 17, 2016 at 1:29 PM UTC
Placid feminine
Seventeen years ago America was shaken to the core. Since not too long after that We've been involved in a non-stop war. Homeland security Became an issue that since then Hoped to assure Americans That such attacks won't happen again. During the past seventeen years Many measures have been taken To make us safe; however, it's time For sleeping minds to reawaken. Lacking foresight, our president Has gone after the people who Have worked to make us safe. The man Doesn't seem to have a clue. Discrediting investigators, Removing them from key positions, And pulling security clearances Because of paranoid suspicions Will only make us vulnerable To future terrorist attacks. Watch how his Republican friends In Congress support him. Political hacks! The president also hates When investigators eye American involvement with The Russian mafia. We know why. It's hard to watch as the president-- With almost each careless endeavor-- Stupidly goes out of his way To make us more unsafe than ever. -by Bob B (9-11-18)
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Sep 11, 2018
Sep 11, 2018 at 12:26 PM UTC
9/11: 17th Anniversary
An ant is just an ant my son An impact it wont make But a million ants will move the world A conviction you won’t shake. An ant is still a living thing It eats, it breaths, it works It runs in an environment Where the hostile spider lurks. It works in regulation With a thousand brother ants To a strict cooperation That achieves communal stance. An intelligence is present, A timetable has been set This organized endeavor Makes it’s success an winning bet. An ant makes love, it rears it’s young It grooms it’s brother’s hide. And if enraged an ant will fight A foe a thousand times it’s size. It’s glittering antennae And it’s shiny compound eye It’s economy of movement And compulsion to deny Involvement with any cause Apart from that one sent By the Queen Ant’s regulations At the Ant God’s monument. I am moved with admiration For this tiny creatures heart, It’s commitment to community And resolve to set apart All individual aspiration And selfish action of it’s own. To gather condiments for nest and Queen Compelled forever more…to roam. Marshalg Mangere Bridge 17th May 2008
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Nov 28, 2009
Nov 28, 2009 at 11:53 AM UTC
Ant
*i hate to break it to you kid, i'm not mindful of narcissus' economics that's all oh so very modern...* but women are their own orbit, more chance to find a single mother than a single father... it's against nature to make the man without god, as it's against nature to make the woman with god... thus we have the tectonic plates making man with god, accepting or doubting, church or laboratory... and woman... an eroticism of jaw eaten faces... but a kiss to be a fingerprint likened to erasing the dangling of the bitten jaw... erased only once by the aphrodisiac of sirens' wail of aquatic opera so damnable that only one man heard it, while others scolded being in audience with beeswax... and by second chance, erased, indeed, but only by the suffragettes as the new nuns... as the new nuns dare comply to change, like every male become female and vice versa, and the popes disclose their continual loss of matrimony in their misogynistic involvement in ****** if i'm not the pope and do no encounter such practices, i'm not a pope at all! *only a ninth spoke as the necromancer, and of the nine spoke clearest, as it spoke, it dawned on me that sauron was invisible for the sword to strike, a gravity enveloping, a gravity envelope, rather than a skin of infinite diadem sharpenings, for nine rigs unto men, seven unto dwarfs, three unto elves, but none unto the orcs... strange.... ORC ARKHAN MORDOR ARRAC!*
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Feb 14, 2016
Feb 14, 2016 at 10:36 PM UTC
the famed aphrodisiac of sirens' wail / ORC ARKHAN MORDOR ARRAC!
*I unload your god in that laissez-faire way where the bandages mend and have no need to be placed, formidably, regret to admit the moonshine in my hair looking Gothic, but beautiful: sober the men’s breath as it falls, falls, falls not more mild than a snowstorm in its final lapse. Sat there to be dreamt. He put his hand to his beard, and I would have kissed if had I believed that he was not merely trying to haunt my body, the hair I kneaded into air. It flowers, and flowing these marzipan sands where God lays man next to his wife, she bears the peaches: juicy, ripened, but not to eat expecting us to swallow ourselves in turn, spin the bottle. I could not care less for the braces in his lips – or their fur, but gums beneath like peaches. **** it out until the pulps mirror, you have the skin of a four fruit, or an eighty, flames high as kites. But suffering for each flicker-knob and dating a girl who smokes cigarettes in bed, I know he could not support that, your god. Morning comes with a glare, now eating her hair the involvement of some odd raconteurs. I beat them and they beat my ******* for their heat – God is a cabin boy with genitals in his palms, said he would love the women as long as they are gone; if he does not see me, the flames, I cannot exist not more than falling falling falling hair.*
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Nov 6, 2012
Nov 6, 2012 at 11:07 AM UTC
a bald god
Substantial quadrants of hate Throughout these veins circulate Spiraling in frenzied states Adrift an ailing coma Infinite corruption clawed my corneas Birthing the erasure of euphoria Imprinting trademarks of memoria Leaving in wake vile aromas All confidence dissolved to solvents Due to definitive involvement Susceptible to gaunt installments Marring my skin with melanoma Mother Earth serves as a mime Humanity must be refined © 2012 (All rights reserved)
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Feb 4, 2012
Feb 4, 2012 at 1:23 AM UTC
Yesteryear
~for my father~ I. My neighbor Dave had a hose in his hand, standard garden, green, almost like a movie. His driveway was bright black the white rocks of our backyard meant something, standing so close. Always moving so fast toward another direction. The memory of the flowers at sunset, when I learned what the word “bloom” meant. It wasn’t real. We used the hose to freeze water over the rocks in the winter. This was our sliding, our skitting into older. That Christmas all I wanted was a bicycle. The house gave up no secrets. Closer and closer to Christmas, I found so many presents. I never found the bicycle. This was how to measure love I went to bed so angry that year, lost in thoughts of running to a world of backyard ice and bicycles. In the morning when I saw it, they confessed Dave’s involvement He had hidden the bicycle. Dave’s smile became something else after that. I learned to ride slowly, tumbled down a hill in blood and tears. My father carried me home and our bikes. I’ve never known how he did it. II. Years later and later still. I don’t know what happened to that bicycle. It was black fading easily. Even though I likely lost it in the first eviction, or maybe the second, the third. I don’t think I left it after the fire. Maybe I still dream of it. Later still. I stopped speaking to my father. It was both our faults. We both blamed someone else for three years. When I saw him again he was fatherly. Unusual. He wanted to make sure I was okay. He wanted to make sure I had everything I needed. I told him I needed food and a bicycle. We went out to get these together. He smiled. In the dreams, People come with whips in pickup trucks. They carry My childhood away like a so-frightened horse. In the dreams, this time, the bicycle was red. I don’t think of him when I ride it. I hardly think of him. This is how you measure love. Those were the dreams where we ride off childhood friends and I. We ride off to where it is red, blooming red.
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Oct 5, 2010
Oct 5, 2010 at 1:03 AM UTC
A Love Story in Two Bicycles
~for my father~ I. My neighbor Dave had a hose in his hand, standard garden, green, almost like a movie. His driveway was bright black the white rocks of our backyard meant something, standing so close. Always moving so fast toward another direction. The memory of the flowers at sunset, when I learned what the word “bloom” meant. It wasn’t real. We used the hose to freeze water over the rocks in the winter. This was our sliding, our skitting into older. That Christmas all I wanted was a bicycle. The house gave up no secrets. Closer and closer to Christmas, I found so many presents. I never found the bicycle. This was how to measure love I went to bed so angry that year, lost in thoughts of running to a world of backyard ice and bicycles. In the morning when I saw it, they confessed Dave’s involvement He had hidden the bicycle. Dave’s smile became something else after that. I learned to ride slowly, tumbled down a hill in blood and tears. My father carried me home and our bikes. I’ve never known how he did it. II. Years later and later still. I don’t know what happened to that bicycle. It was black fading easily. Even though I likely lost it in the first eviction, or maybe the second, the third. I don’t think I left it after the fire. Maybe I still dream of it. Later still. I stopped speaking to my father. It was both our faults. We both blamed someone else for three years. When I saw him again he was fatherly. Unusual. He wanted to make sure I was okay. He wanted to make sure I had everything I needed. I told him I needed food and a bicycle. We went out to get these together. He smiled. In the dreams, People come with whips in pickup trucks. They carry My childhood away like a so-frightened horse. In the dreams, this time, the bicycle was red. I don’t think of him when I ride it. I hardly think of him. This is how you measure love. Those were the dreams where we ride off childhood friends and I. We ride off to where it is red, blooming red.
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72
it faded like slavery but the screams will not. not this time not with this much involvement my body,  a strawberry strawberry,  begging for fondue slavery begging for an end involvement is too exhausting nor giving any relief,  so much energy spent slowly,  as if dripping time wasted wasted time, wasted life, dipped in a bitter fondue, unpleasant and messy dipping of bitter lips until the bitter end, *** empty,  needs washing, another exhausting task, requiring to much involvement, too much effort Effort is what i can't give, I'm bitter about that and angry. With too much resentment, just growing inside me. More messy baggage, another issue, as if I don't already have enough. So im bitter,  so what? What difference does it make? I'm to battered for repair, I'm to exhausted for any attempt at anything
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Jun 11, 2015
Jun 11, 2015 at 8:30 AM UTC
fade
12/27/2013 I cried in the shower. When nobody was around to see, except me - looking at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. But it was enough to make me cry harder, cry louder, cry softer, cry unseen and cry unheard. Cry out of sight and cry out of mind and cry without saying a single word. Cry for the fallen who can't get up. Cry for the tortured whose lives have been messed up. Cry for a family I've never heard of. Cry for the homeless and poor who just needed a little bit more love. Cry for my friend who recently contracted *** Cry for him, because I wish instead it had been me. I sat up in bed after midnight, writing a diary entry it read, "No happy greeting tonight." I laid down in the empty bathtub with the shower running, spraying hot water, only on to my side. The rest of me, freezing cold, exposed. I played a song in the background, called Wounded. There were three separate streams running down my face: water, shampoo, and are those Tears coming out of the shower faucet? It seemed like a perfect scene for a tragic movie. It definitely felt 'unreal' enough to be in one. I was spitting a lot. maybe because the bitterness of words trapped in my mouth contaminated my palate. He might have *** Highly Likely. and I always viewed him as invulnerable. We spoke on the phone and he pretended to be strong but I can sense feelings. I guessed it after all. Only we might know so far. Tomorrow he finds out. Don't worry about me. No ****** involvement - I'm not lucky enough to get a guy like that. I feel a fraction of his fear and pain though. I've been an idiot and a bad friend. So no happy greeting tonight diary. Please excuse my sorrow and don't take pity. No worries, I think those were just Tears coming out of the shower faucet. Like the single Tear I wake up with each morning ever since I heard he got it.
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Dec 27, 2013
Dec 27, 2013 at 12:48 PM UTC
Are those Tears coming out of the shower faucet?
12/27/2013 I cried in the shower. When nobody was around to see, except me - looking at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. But it was enough to make me cry harder, cry louder, cry softer, cry unseen and cry unheard. Cry out of sight and cry out of mind and cry without saying a single word. Cry for the fallen who can't get up. Cry for the tortured whose lives have been messed up. Cry for a family I've never heard of. Cry for the homeless and poor who just needed a little bit more love. Cry for my friend who recently contracted *** Cry for him, because I wish instead it had been me. I sat up in bed after midnight, writing a diary entry it read, "No happy greeting tonight." I laid down in the empty bathtub with the shower running, spraying hot water, only on to my side. The rest of me, freezing cold, exposed. I played a song in the background, called Wounded. There were three separate streams running down my face: water, shampoo, and are those Tears coming out of the shower faucet? It seemed like a perfect scene for a tragic movie. It definitely felt 'unreal' enough to be in one. I was spitting a lot. maybe because the bitterness of words trapped in my mouth contaminated my palate. He might have *** Highly Likely. and I always viewed him as invulnerable. We spoke on the phone and he pretended to be strong but I can sense feelings. I guessed it after all. Only we might know so far. Tomorrow he finds out. Don't worry about me. No ****** involvement - I'm not lucky enough to get a guy like that. I feel a fraction of his fear and pain though. I've been an idiot and a bad friend. So no happy greeting tonight diary. Please excuse my sorrow and don't take pity. No worries, I think those were just Tears coming out of the shower faucet. Like the single Tear I wake up with each morning ever since I heard he got it.
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39
He puts it out there, the Schrödinger’s cat of invitations. Now, I’m irritated. “I TOLD you I don’t have time for.. involvement.” “But you have to eat - so eat with ME,” he shrugs. “You can build a friendship with someone and still have freedom.” His observation was casual, as though it were unrelated to anything between us. He seemed to have the intuition that I’d balk if pressed. “You’re subversive.” I said. “Why me? There are prettier girls, more agreeable, fun girls. I feel like I’m on the edge here,” I look around to indicate the room, the environment, the university. “And I can be a complete as-hole.” He looked a little offended, “You’re interesting, I like what I know about you and, yeah, we can all be as-holes - we’re in a pool of “A” types, in case you haven’t noticed.” “What do you KNOW about me?” I ask. “I’ve read some of your writings,” he looked thoughtful, “I may know a little about how you think, It’s unusual.. interesting.” I’m shocked and I squirm, “You looked me up?” “I looked you up.” he nodded, “to be sure you’re not an axe murderer.” “How much did you read?” I asked, wheedling, my inner-writer engaging. “Tell you at dinner - YOU name the date and time,” he smiled. “My idea of “dinner” is walking to a dining hall, picking up a bag of food, bringing it back here and taking ten minutes to eat it between chapters,” I warned. “I have a meal card,” he says, jiggling his student lanyard. “We’ll see.” I said. “Have you talked to anyone else about my writing?” “No,” he answered, “Why?” “Please don’t, I have to think about it.” I say. As far as I know, no one I know in RL has read me - it’s an odd feeling - like maybe he got ahold of my diary. I haven’t worried over the fact that someone I’m in physical proximity to could look me up. That all this stuff is actually out there. “Don’t think my misgivings can be cajoled away,” I say, “no more talking.” He chucked but we got back to studying.
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Nov 16, 2021
Nov 16, 2021 at 10:21 PM UTC
out there
He puts it out there, the Schrödinger’s cat of invitations. Now, I’m irritated. “I TOLD you I don’t have time for.. involvement.” “But you have to eat - so eat with ME,” he shrugs. “You can build a friendship with someone and still have freedom.” His observation was casual, as though it were unrelated to anything between us. He seemed to have the intuition that I’d balk if pressed. “You’re subversive.” I said. “Why me? There are prettier girls, more agreeable, fun girls. I feel like I’m on the edge here,” I look around to indicate the room, the environment, the university. “And I can be a complete as-hole.” He looked a little offended, “You’re interesting, I like what I know about you and, yeah, we can all be as-holes - we’re in a pool of “A” types, in case you haven’t noticed.” “What do you KNOW about me?” I ask. “I’ve read some of your writings,” he looked thoughtful, “I may know a little about how you think, It’s unusual.. interesting.” I’m shocked and I squirm, “You looked me up?” “I looked you up.” he nodded, “to be sure you’re not an axe murderer.” “How much did you read?” I asked, wheedling, my inner-writer engaging. “Tell you at dinner - YOU name the date and time,” he smiled. “My idea of “dinner” is walking to a dining hall, picking up a bag of food, bringing it back here and taking ten minutes to eat it between chapters,” I warned. “I have a meal card,” he says, jiggling his student lanyard. “We’ll see.” I said. “Have you talked to anyone else about my writing?” “No,” he answered, “Why?” “Please don’t, I have to think about it.” I say. As far as I know, no one I know in RL has read me - it’s an odd feeling - like maybe he got ahold of my diary. I haven’t worried over the fact that someone I’m in physical proximity to could look me up. That all this stuff is actually out there. “Don’t think my misgivings can be cajoled away,” I say, “no more talking.” He chucked but we got back to studying.
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18
DEAR JUSTICE,                        Every act that day                        revealed their involvement,                        in their regions, blood pools lay,                        as deep dug the predicament,                        death and displacement left all awry,                        cries of agony crawled, crumbling all.                        JUSTICE! They have drawn a blank today,                        branding them WAHESHIMIWA, the gall,                        visiting us with ‘aid’ and false word, here in the tent,                        where they just shove us in the recent,                        their dope remains in minds of the awakened,                        in those suits we see spooks  good at demolishing                        stretch your hand and dispense a mete from them                        for in you we reckon that they will pay.
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Nov 1, 2013
Nov 1, 2013 at 2:23 PM UTC
A Cry For Justice(Dedication to victims of post-election violence victims in Kenya)
Ordinary words in ordinary order Slouch across the page unnoticed Mundane metaphors and trite observations Destroy catch phrases with every old saw Memes are dragged behind overused hashtags Until they morph into yesterday’s news Dusty and bent and soiled on the edges Same ole rehash of the same ole crap Whitewashing the fence of involvement The old wive’s tales are alternative facts That dance to the tune of an illiterate piper In a boring routine choreographed by A sullen pre-teen who finds herself grounded. Wherever you’re going, You can’t get there from here. ljm
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Jul 2, 2017
Jul 2, 2017 at 8:44 AM UTC
PEDESTRIAN
It's quite odd how the average man will not commit to run With any issues challenging his personal smoking gun. With issues that confound in discomfort’s naked face Or adopt a stance of reticence when confronted here apace. Won’t lend a ready helping hand for fear of being held Accountable for consequence imagined or dispelled, Distrustful of the outcome in involvement’s disrepair Would much prefer retreat to accountability there. A quotient disappointment to the greater human race Are the spineless who refuse to look directly to my face. Marshalg 9 October 2013
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Oct 9, 2013
Oct 9, 2013 at 1:25 AM UTC
The Reticence...
causing those problems that are only self involving involvement in your own resolve is in no way evolving evolution has it's own way of science problem solving solutions are few when new old thoughts keep revolving revolution is measured by a once around spinning spin the bottle, kiss your mom, no earth inverts are winning winners only win when herds of losers start thinning thin air will carry angry ghosts back to the beginning begin again to reach the end as the world keeps turning turn the page you always turn when the book starts burning burn it all down just as long as it ain't self concerning concern yourself with you and be the last man left yearning
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Sep 27, 2021
Sep 27, 2021 at 8:56 PM UTC
Last Man Left Yearning - Quantum Loop Poem - The most premium poetry form
The only role I ever land is "outcast tortured by the cruelty and pain of his past" I sure didn't choose this path, feels more as though I've been typecast, or maybe I am a ********* holding out for every last ounce of pain before I blast this trader living in my head for the last 30 years off my shoulders, through a window pane, then, just as fast, turn to the vast hole in my chest that once held my heart and press the cold steel to it with the mass of my dread firmly in my grasp, gun fire drowned out by echoing laughs, fulfilling a prophecy of my future while neglecting lessons from my past, the game of life feels less like a game of chance and more like a test that's harder to advance than all the rest and wouldn't you know it, I fell asleep in class and didn't pass, apparently I even tuned out the emergency broadcast. Went and amassed a losing record that'd be impressive if not for the direct contrast the win column presents and the enormous shadow my downfall casts. Harassed by the devil on each shoulder, I thought that maybe once I got older, if I could just stay on task and remain steadfast, I would be able to open a can of whoop a$$ and trespass the evil within this house of glass but alas I must telegraph my every move or they've seen a future telecast because they lambast each strike and I'm not sure I'll outlast these issues, I'm gassed, plus, problems have started showing up in mass from a much higher weight class, they must have bypassed the weigh in process but I've always known who the deck was stacked against, hence why I never win, I only survive and my methods would flabbergast most, the truth finds it's way to the surface and I find myself aghast, crying like I've been teargassed with no gas mask but I've surpassed the point where waterworks will bring forth empathy, gotta own my involvement in the crash, volunteer to take out my own trash and this time I'll throw my pain out with the bath water and be free at last...free at last, free at last, no thanks to god almighty I'll be free at last ©2021
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Jan 8, 2021
Jan 8, 2021 at 5:10 AM UTC
~•§•~ Typecast ~•§•~
The only role I ever land is "outcast tortured by the cruelty and pain of his past" I sure didn't choose this path, feels more as though I've been typecast, or maybe I am a ********* holding out for every last ounce of pain before I blast this trader living in my head for the last 30 years off my shoulders, through a window pane, then, just as fast, turn to the vast hole in my chest that once held my heart and press the cold steel to it with the mass of my dread firmly in my grasp, gun fire drowned out by echoing laughs, fulfilling a prophecy of my future while neglecting lessons from my past, the game of life feels less like a game of chance and more like a test that's harder to advance than all the rest and wouldn't you know it, I fell asleep in class and didn't pass, apparently I even tuned out the emergency broadcast. Went and amassed a losing record that'd be impressive if not for the direct contrast the win column presents and the enormous shadow my downfall casts. Harassed by the devil on each shoulder, I thought that maybe once I got older, if I could just stay on task and remain steadfast, I would be able to open a can of whoop a$$ and trespass the evil within this house of glass but alas I must telegraph my every move or they've seen a future telecast because they lambast each strike and I'm not sure I'll outlast these issues, I'm gassed, plus, problems have started showing up in mass from a much higher weight class, they must have bypassed the weigh in process but I've always known who the deck was stacked against, hence why I never win, I only survive and my methods would flabbergast most, the truth finds it's way to the surface and I find myself aghast, crying like I've been teargassed with no gas mask but I've surpassed the point where waterworks will bring forth empathy, gotta own my involvement in the crash, volunteer to take out my own trash and this time I'll throw my pain out with the bath water and be free at last...free at last, free at last, no thanks to god almighty I'll be free at last ©2021
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2
I have this fear Of Spiders Of webs Of entanglement. In threads of Commitment to an everyday lack of Excitement, Enchantment, Involvement Of Spiders. Unpredictable Lurking near their diamond spun circles Of melifluous entrapment I would not want to escape Consumption Being wrapped in silky smooth lies Promoting penetration of my self respect The addiction causing venom to spread Already pumping Adrenaline Endorphine rush I have this fear of losing myself In this
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Mar 3, 2013
Mar 3, 2013 at 7:00 AM UTC
Arachnophobia
To sit upon this wooden chair Before this plain white wall, May seem, to you, to be quite odd To me it does enthrall. I take in all the vacant space And let my eyes caress The symmetry and peacefulness …And I really must confess, The nothingness before me Draws me in, in such a way As I wrap myself in plain, white wall … my mind begins to play From that tiny smudge of blue emerge Kaleidescopes of clay Which carouse across the vacant space In a most artistic way, In small concentric circles In a patterned, frenzied style They fill the background with mosaic Of a gold and reddish tile, With rooster tails of livid green And dancing through the scene, A spangled hand of aqua blue Paints off a sequined theme., Some dancing naked maidens Cavort pinkly in the pool And a flight of silver satyrs Scamper in and act the fool. The roaring sound of raindrops, The rush of welling tears, There’s the thrill of my involvement …and then “Ping” It disappears! My plain white wall’s in front of me, I’m sitting on that stool. I sneak a peak, to check and see, If someone’s being cruel. My sister caught me out one day, She roared with earthy glee And pointed her fat finger That girl made fun of me. It’s really a small price to pay To be a strange oddball. I’d rather suffer this than leave To watch ANOTHER wall. I sit upon this wooden chair Before this plain white wall, May seem, to you, to be quite odd To me it does enthrall….. Marshalg Mangere Bridge 24 January 2008
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Oct 20, 2009
Oct 20, 2009 at 8:43 PM UTC
My Plain White Wall
To sit upon this wooden chair Before this plain white wall, May seem, to you, to be quite odd To me it does enthrall. I take in all the vacant space And let my eyes caress The symmetry and peacefulness …And I really must confess, The nothingness before me Draws me in, in such a way As I wrap myself in plain, white wall … my mind begins to play From that tiny smudge of blue emerge Kaleidescopes of clay Which carouse across the vacant space In a most artistic way, In small concentric circles In a patterned, frenzied style They fill the background with mosaic Of a gold and reddish tile, With rooster tails of livid green And dancing through the scene, A spangled hand of aqua blue Paints off a sequined theme., Some dancing naked maidens Cavort pinkly in the pool And a flight of silver satyrs Scamper in and act the fool. The roaring sound of raindrops, The rush of welling tears, There’s the thrill of my involvement …and then “Ping” It disappears! My plain white wall’s in front of me, I’m sitting on that stool. I sneak a peak, to check and see, If someone’s being cruel. My sister caught me out one day, She roared with earthy glee And pointed her fat finger That girl made fun of me. It’s really a small price to pay To be a strange oddball. I’d rather suffer this than leave To watch ANOTHER wall. I sit upon this wooden chair Before this plain white wall, May seem, to you, to be quite odd To me it does enthrall….. Marshalg Mangere Bridge 24 January 2008
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I sit before you a shadow of my former self, where once I would have reflected all that is you, Now I absorb your freely beamed energy, hoping to feel the way I did before so long ago My strength is my inner wisdom, not the outer shell; although still handsome some would say A depth of character resonates from “those eyes” dark black/brown still smouldering, still alive, knowing The delights of the body still wanting, occasionally satisfied, the mind plays tricks, for a while young again Ambition becomes survival; action becomes interest and discussion, finally knowledge and experience A struggle for acceptance or a path cut into my psyche through the ignorance of youth and inexperience or Was it the innocence of not knowing and the eagerness of an open mind with a thirst for facts and the truth. The incomprehension of reality continues to acceptance “I am older now” my life thus far an adventure, Limited by health and financial restriction, inventiveness rules the day, a shared belief a shared involvement.
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Nov 25, 2012
Nov 25, 2012 at 6:55 PM UTC
Broken, but not destroyed!
it's not a memorisable lullaby, i don't want to write poetry that requires memorisation by school children; perhaps a riddle, perhaps a jigsaw, perhaps an awakening after the words dig in from their arrangement into your own usage, distinguished. these days, someone on a social strata of being absolved might require a concerned dis-involvement from nouns, and thus juggle the pronouns, over-use pronouns to remain politically accurate and sound, for to replace nouns with pronouns would bleach people, entrapped in the constant affirmative of something they once owned but were dispossessed of, they do that, they stress the usage of pronouns by a relief a diet of noun usage, so that a Pakistani dare not use the associations of the noun that might decipher his skin as cinnamon in writing, unless it be pronoun inclusive and noun exclusive, so as modern society teaches: become pronoun users with a few distinguishing nouns congregating, don't learn carboxylic, don't learn onomatopoeia... keep up with the bleak egoism that states: not so much self-interest, but over-pronoun-use and a lack of nouns, or if used, reduced to quizzes of crosswords with antonyms and synonyms pronounced; he who confesses to censoring noun usage will control the pronoun category by usurping noun usage freely with a censored usage that will only provoke counter-nouns / slang / encoding / the need for surveillance.
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Feb 9, 2016
Feb 9, 2016 at 1:02 PM UTC
diplomatic anonymity
the blatant frustrations of live feed editing. enter the tablet, joystick free, one touch games, quiet interesting that it’s so hard to get a gaming addiction with such games as candy crush soda, family farm, bubble witch 2... you will not see an adrenaline tornado on these platitudes, no movie like involvement, no plot... just time contraints, money constraints, the adequate reflection of life: hey mort! when you coming? hey forthnight debility cheque! when you coming? (i too thought tetris originated in japan, but it was actually of soviet design! so in conclusion: games designed to be as reflected by someone doing a crossword - i'm crap at those, being bilingual is obstructive - i'm in constant translation mode looking for picturesque synonymity - or doing sūdoku - which i'm not too bad at.) a bit like that jesus debacle, so gott insisted on giving proof of his existence to a baby... bad move... the kid grew up in a bubble and thought he could do anything... elijah just said to the priests: but if your god doesn’t exist, what’s the point of having you? later he repented on mt. sinai where god was but a whisper... like the whisper of the dream of what rome was at first: a republic. i believe in republicanism, i don’t believe in that shamble that’s known as democracy, and is currently the biggest export from america... exported to usurp other nation’s republicanism - the elders of afghanistan will never be modern family mr. jason wordsmith and mr. jack wordsmith, raising an adopted / surrogate mother’s kid... not in a million years... nor will revised buddhism in western europe ever be original shinto of japan... not in a million years... we’re not a monochromatic people. back to jesus: there’s not one shred of christianity in jurisprudence (philosophy of law / etymology: prudence of having a jury) - but when you’re faced with an enemy who’s a lawyer, and has connections... and you’re a poor idiot who was forced into a paranoid schizophrenia simulation for 7 years... you don’t set out to attack and get compensation like that woman schopenhauer pushed down the stairs... you set out to prove god - and subsequently leave the ******* in his own waiting line for karma - i hardly think there will be an oliver twit in him to ask for some more.
0
Dec 6, 2015
Dec 6, 2015 at 2:20 PM UTC
gaming addiction
the blatant frustrations of live feed editing. enter the tablet, joystick free, one touch games, quiet interesting that it’s so hard to get a gaming addiction with such games as candy crush soda, family farm, bubble witch 2... you will not see an adrenaline tornado on these platitudes, no movie like involvement, no plot... just time contraints, money constraints, the adequate reflection of life: hey mort! when you coming? hey forthnight debility cheque! when you coming? (i too thought tetris originated in japan, but it was actually of soviet design! so in conclusion: games designed to be as reflected by someone doing a crossword - i'm crap at those, being bilingual is obstructive - i'm in constant translation mode looking for picturesque synonymity - or doing sūdoku - which i'm not too bad at.) a bit like that jesus debacle, so gott insisted on giving proof of his existence to a baby... bad move... the kid grew up in a bubble and thought he could do anything... elijah just said to the priests: but if your god doesn’t exist, what’s the point of having you? later he repented on mt. sinai where god was but a whisper... like the whisper of the dream of what rome was at first: a republic. i believe in republicanism, i don’t believe in that shamble that’s known as democracy, and is currently the biggest export from america... exported to usurp other nation’s republicanism - the elders of afghanistan will never be modern family mr. jason wordsmith and mr. jack wordsmith, raising an adopted / surrogate mother’s kid... not in a million years... nor will revised buddhism in western europe ever be original shinto of japan... not in a million years... we’re not a monochromatic people. back to jesus: there’s not one shred of christianity in jurisprudence (philosophy of law / etymology: prudence of having a jury) - but when you’re faced with an enemy who’s a lawyer, and has connections... and you’re a poor idiot who was forced into a paranoid schizophrenia simulation for 7 years... you don’t set out to attack and get compensation like that woman schopenhauer pushed down the stairs... you set out to prove god - and subsequently leave the ******* in his own waiting line for karma - i hardly think there will be an oliver twit in him to ask for some more.
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