I reached for the stars,
And I think I may have reached too far.
The stars, they blistered and scorched my hands,
While I was just trying to understand
Of why in the first place I was there;
Up in space throwing a glare
at the moon.

The moon who shun a godly, divine light,
And at night
Who was so bright, white,
And elegant.
Space who was dark, and as dim as my soul:
The colour of ash and coal.
I was just trying to obtain a stupid goal
That I had.

And the moon was white, and the space was black.
The stars were gold and I had my back
Towards the earth.
But the gold stars and the white moon were not all that
When they brought down an evil wrath
On me.
So the sun, who I actually feared,
Cradled and held me near.
Rocked me from side to side and called me dear.
Circled the earth and formed a year
To teach me that looks can be deceiving,
Misleading,
And can lead to infinte internall bleeding.

I will strike
I will make it work
This is my stage
And I run this show
There's no two ways bout it
That I will touch the endless galaxies
Feel infinte, be embellished
Break the glass, and steal the crystals,
Mount the skys, and imprint eternity

Time is an illusion
Unveiling the deception
Of hate.
Hiding behind walls built by vanity.
Bricks of insecurities concealed broken hearts.
Shattered into a million pieces,
creating a puzzle that longs to be put back together again.
A wound heart becomes a cold petrified incarcerated soul.
Imprisoned by fears where love can't exist.
Love is infinite and fears give boundaries that reflect deception. Because it causes people to hide their true feelings.
True love has no limits.

empty hallways, forgotten voices
pictures hang, dusty and off balanced
cobwebs spread from door to mirror
a young rat scurries past the broken floor

his picture still hangs over the fireplace
a spider runs down his well-shaped nose
each brush stroke is thick and sculptured
the dust collects as sand dunes

the whole room seems mysterious
books of occult line the paint-chipped walls
the windows cracked the night air blows
dead trees peer down on slamming shutters

the old house creeks and cracks
howling doge are echos of past crickets sing songs of last dreams
this house, this ledgend infinte
captures one's mind as lonley and hideous
remembers it's myths fools false illusions
under the now dim light of the moon
spooks creep silent footsteps
his spirit surrounds the acre
truth and lies untested question
of how he lived alone from living

I found myself on your car with you, our bodies intertwined.
We'd gaze up at the infinte stars.
One was yours and one was mine.

Now I find myself on my bed alone,
My pillow soaked straight through.
I gaze alone now, on my infinite tears,
which all belong to you.

One can only get nearer the truth
One can never reach it
For words do not exist
Nor the mind capable of conceptualizing
An ultimate truth

The human thus forges on
To perfect his craft
Through
Literature

By finding the perfect abstract story
Finds a closer approximation of
The truth

it is in the language
of the stars
and the secrets
of the leafs
it is the smile
and laughter of children

it is a tear blooming
into an ocean
it is the lost sands
stranded on the shores
that time has forgotten
it is the infinte sorry
only eternity can hold

it is a blanket of forgiveness
warming the beds of sin
it is the lips
and the color
of a first kiss
it is the serenity
of a dying breath

it is the birth and life
and beauty of love
it is loves lust
and desires prayers

it is yesterday's tomorrow
and todays yesterdary
it is the here
and the now

it is the air in our lungs
and the song of our hearts
it is the blood and marrow
of our souls

poetry is in everything
and everything is poetry

poetry holds onto
what death takes away
so we will know
that no matter how long we live

life

is always
too short

so always remember
do not squander this gift away
this may be
your once in a lifetime life
this could be the only
heaven you walk through
the only hell you suffer in


poetry does not lie

so in no circumstance


ever


lie to poetry

poets however will lie
almost always
except for the ones who don't  
they always tell the truth
the devil cheats at dice
and every other game he plays
and even angels can decive
be careful in who you belive

always be kind
hug daily and often
love who you love
no matter the odds
or situation
or how ridiculous
or improbable
or illogical it may seem

break the rules
when you must
trust your gut
and belive in your heart

it may not work out in your favor
it may break you
and if it does
it will feel terribly unbearable
but you will get through it

eventually

it will not always seem fair
it will not always feel good
but in the end

love

is what will make it
look beautiful
when you take
your last look back
at the life
that no matter how long it was
will have been too short

emptiness floating on a soft breeze;
         gently sweeping the surface,
                   the world is ingested.

envy, the one wholly pure remnant,
         is sacredly held by the breeze;
                   it becomes everything.

proceeded by greed of the empty,
            the worldy consumption is
                  everything as nothing.

existence is jealousy alive within a
            gust of melancholy winds,
                     sifting through the

infinte abyss of everything that is
            whole; the entity of true
                     whollyness residing

within the boundaries of all that
           is confined by emptiness:
                everything as nothing.



logic and analysis aren't existent.
        time rests in nowhere land.

                             envy is god.

*may the lord repent me for my sins?

"Who would you die for?"
Those words echoed across a sunny sky.
You stutter and fidget-
for a while.
Break the silence-
I smiled a fake grin and laugh.
"Just kidding!" Your expression turns pathetically relieved.
I love you too much to make you choose.
Do you know, though, that I,
would die for you?

My thoughts turn to a wrinkled, yellow poem.
"If only, if only, the woodpecker sighed-"
The world does not spin righted as before, does it?

What if everyone could be reborn again?
Would they chose the same fate?
Would they choose the same people who made them laugh-
so happily-
before?
A world filled with only happiness-
that is a fool's dream.

You once held my hand and said, "I'll stay until you find happiness."
But didn't you know?
The first time I felt true happiness was the moment I met you.
I swore to lock that memory in my chest,
selefishly binding you here.

How many times have I sinned?
When did I first ***** my hands with soot?

The beautiful mask I so carefully carved-
Has been so easily cracked by your gentle fingers.

No matter how much you want something for the future,
things set in stone will never change.

The pure vows we took-
has been ripped like spider silk by my hands alone.

The pure vows we stained-
are just more strings for me to puppeteer.

Those pure black vows have flown away in the infinte,
never
to
come
back.

Radar cannot detect this creature
Giant hulking form penetrates the outer layer
Uncertain blob appearing and disappearing
Here.                                                                      There


Then over here.                    


And there.
We don't know what were looking at. Beyond our four dimensional universe there lies all but infinte more dimensions.
No way.
No way to ever understand, comprehend, we compare to man. Gross.
Beauty and death all in strike. I couldn't see a ******* thing. It blinded my third eye. Beast, outer, pervaded being. Unsure intentions. I arouse at its conscience

There might be an infinte number of disparate stars and galaxies in this interminably cosmic universe,
but my sorrowful eyes will be transfixed on the most majestic star that outshines the twilight lit sky,
the pulchritudinous star that divines the derailed train of thoughts into constellations within my claustrophobic & restless mind.

the star....
that is you.

your mystery resembles that of
ancestors buried beaneth the living
endless tombs infused with secrets for
only the earth and life in its very self to know
and when in your arms, oh how I wish that I may die
as to know those hidden things that you carry
within your frail frame of humanity and
that beating heart that I immerse myself in
and feel as I did when I was only 4
I understand mediums of distance should be kept
between us, and I give respect to the energy
that needs the breathe there
we cannot suffocate that
we cannot abuse it
I feel you in every extreme
when next to you Im am on the edge
of a building ready to jump
into a infinte fall
I feel you like the love
a terrorist has for his cause
I love you like the mother
loving her sick child in her deepest
height and fear
this
this is how I love you
with every drop of intensity that
I can manifest within my stricken body
I long for you the way the earth
will long for the bee’s after they
banish from this world
I lay next to you like the pedal
opening agaisnt her leaf
and I fall into you the way the
dew falls off the stem an onto
the tombstone beneath it
and when you kiss me
and feed me the liquid of your body
I am the starving immigrant lost
in a foreign desert rescued after closing
his eyes and accepting that death shall come
but then I open my blistered eyes and you
are there
lets walk down streets heavy and engraved
with depth so that we can feel understanding
in what is around us
let us live in places that have lived
as long as we have, where love
such as ours endless, has bred€
the sky covers us with its thunder
and I lay wet and covered in us
my pupils expanding
in
wonder

Walking through the forest route
I use to pick up stones, pointy as well as smooth
Stacked them in an infinte jar of memories
With every stone, sharing stories

My precious were of different colours
But it all looked the same to others
For my dreams, the jar was a shrine
Every stone was a memory my heart coudnt confine

Throughout my everyday walk
I searched for that special rock
Pearl, ruby, topaz or emerald
But the one not meant to be hurled

Little did I know about moments passing by
It's after everything when gone, we cry
Images flashing and nostalgia striking
Stones from my jar began smiling

Every stone was a special one
Reminding memories of someone
Childhood, youth ,adulthood
My jar contained everything it could

Life is a regret of letting go of some stones
Tinier than the memory it owns
All I need is a pool of such stones to dive
To bring my dead forgotten dreams alive

In
The hours
When the lips of the rocks
Were gummed
The howling waters
Wore the garments of tranquility
And laid allay

We
Stood on the waters
Head truss
Like a petal and a sepal on a stalk
We spoke no words
Yet our minds
Understood the language of the heart
The burning flames within
And the sparkling urges

Then
I lurk through her breath
And stole her soul
Together our spirits went aloft
Over jaundiced shadows
High and higher to the clouds
Till it gulp us onto the universe

There
I tucked her arm onto mine
And walked her
Down the aisles and palaces
Of the planets
Jupiter was no more,but Johanna

Then
I sat her on the hallowed throne
And touched her hands with the smiles of the sun
With the candies of the moon
In her mouth
One,two,three,...
I counted the stars
As my parole of love

Infinte Parole
©Historian E.Lexano

i can tell you only one thing,
my sight searches for you,
like the dawn searching for the
orange hue of the waking sun.

i love you,
not just because you are the portrait
the muses dote on;
the brightest stars may,
shed their infinte radiance to you my dear;
but you to me, are my endless light,
a light that refreshes my ageing soul.
and you, my beloved, are seared into my heart;
like an oxbrand that tames a maverick.

if you do not love me,
do not befriend me.
for every moment that you stay on,
my love for you will,
like a flame on a candle that
continues to light on till i am no more,
and i will go on being drawn to you as a moth, being
drawn to its demise; the fiery light that proved false.

instead, my dear,
toss me into the deepest chasm
where the roaring tempests will wash away,
all my lingering thoughts of you.
until little by little, i shall stop remembering
that you were once, my yearning.
and once i forgot you my darling,
you will no longer be my haunt.

but before my impalpable longing,
for you, my sweet, turns to ashes,
let me tell you this;
yet, you were the hope, that led me to
nowhere, you were still, the hope that kept me on.
and after that, mon amie, i shall have stopped
loving you.

& I find myself staring at the moon
basking in her light
hoping she will give me guidance
praying she will help me fight

& I feel that God is in the rain
perhaps those drops are his tears
I see them fall to earth
then I know that he can hear

& I see the stars withall their gleam
they glow above without a care
showing me there is always light
there is always someone there

& I watch the clouds roll by
they block out all the bad
with every storm that passes through
it takes with it all the pain I had

& I know the sun burns hot
his heat would leave me asking
will your warmth always be around
now I know his fire is ever lasting

& as long as I have the moon
the clouds, the rain, the sun
the infinte sky of stars
then my life will never come undone

you have created a positive energy within me
that gives birth everytime you linger in my presence
my womb explodes with your static blue
leaving permanent goodsebumps whispering
the deepest tales of forbidden love

my cheek has found its warm home on your chest
listening to your heart beat
my ears have longed for the noise of your life
flickering beneath me like my ghosts that burn
when you place your hand so simply upon mine

you are water to my soul spreading like
glowing beams of light through my frail body,
sustaining and giving me the power to open my eyes from deadly sleep

drag my being into infinte space and I, because of you
can light the darkest edge of the universe
you have given me the power of 10,000 burning suns

I feel that anything is possible, strangely enough
and for the first time I have placed a pressure
upon myself to become more of another human
full of hope and acceptence, you move me

there is a eager passion waging war inside of
my arms to fight any army to bring you near me
let me protect you. let me be the one to bring
you more sincerity if it be possible
can you be filled with more love
I want us to build our home with the seeds
we have found in each others secluded gardens

while I write the lines that make us beautiful
and you sing them with your trembeling voice

Nothing but this exists.
Nothing but you,
Nothing but me,
Nothing but this nothingness.

I am the infinte,
the almighty.
I am everything and nothing,

I am the void in your soul,
the mystery in your ear,
that call of night and darkness
in the hallow sweat of fear.

I’m a wreck,
a ship on edens shore.
I am here,
there,
and one day I will be no more.

I am dissatisfaction and I am pounding at your door.
But do not answer or acknowledge me.
I am too busy
waging little wars against my battered skin.
I am that itch that stings in the crook of your back,
the place you cannot reach.
Let me freeze or let me burn,
but do not come out here with me.
I need
to be
alone.

What infinte pleasure I live in.
Finding joy and delight in my ever twist and turn.
The impurity of the world delights me.
Death and torture have begun to tease me.
Like ******* to a growing child.

What sweet ecstasy the macabre expounds to me.
It seems all I want in the world are tools to make my life harder.
It's to easy to come by happiness in this state.
I was made for this world.
Sent by god to enjoy the evilest of her spoils.

I am a gift to all that is disgusting on earth.
Like a tree I clean the air of agony.
This is done by stuffing my face with it.
Ooh how beautiful blood trully is.
But your to busy feeling joy to admire this.

I pitty the stupidity of the emotionally and mentally sane.
I wonder what lies they were told that make them feel whole.
Do they not see the fire beneath their feet.
Do they not feel the heat burn through their souls.
Or am I blessed with a sadness that helps me feel true emotions.

I am a parasite that spreads disease.
However I spread it only to those in need of me.
I engrave my skin with all my sins.
Then whisper sweet nothings to a dead tree.
Often I spread ink filled with my dreams all over screens.
Oh what a creep I seem to be.

You dream of love.
I dream of lust.
Yet I am called a foul.
In truth only one of these lies from the world we live in can come true.
But you carry on pining for the wrong one.

You still have dreams.
But somehow hate the idea of a neverending sleep.
What a fool you are to wish you can be better.
When you can always wish not to be.
How can you fear the wrath of a deity that won't even let you be.

Do you really live when you fear death.
Or do you breathe bubbles of oxygen in your watery web of lies.
Continuing to tell yourself untruths in order to feel alive.
It's sad how trully depressed you are don't you think.
You won't feel this truth for it's a mirror you refuse to see your ****** through.

I wonder how vulnerable you feel knowing I know to much about you.
You'll probably look me in the eyes and hold back tears.
Even if you do I know and enjoy the thought that I have violated you.
You are putty in my hands.
All because I know you beg for a better person to notice you.

But they won't.
Infact they never do.
You are nothing and everyday you try to forget.
But your inferiority is my truth so I own it.
You are are ugly beyond compare.
So ugly that you cry unprovoked for hours and hours wishing your life would end.

Empty hallways, forgotten voices
pictures hang, dusty and off balanced
cobwebs spread from door to mirror
a young rat scurries past the broken floor

His portrait still hangs over the fireplace
a spider runs down his well-shaped nose
each brush stroke is thick and sculptured
dust collects on it as sand dunes

The windows cracked,the night air blows
dead trees peer down at slamming shutters
howling dogs are echos past
his spriits surround the acre

This house, this legend infinte
remembers it's myths fool false illusion
truths and lies untested questions
of how he lived alone from living

I stare upon the stars,
In awe of their gleaming wonder;
And they back at me from their
distant but eloquent vantage point.

They gaze from the perspective of true infinity;
And I from the tiny piece of the infinte my consciousness allows.

If we listened for long enough,
With the correct volume of concentration;
Perhaps we would grasp a slice of the knowledge
Needed to calm our ever frantic minds.
Grab hold of some greater truth;
A truth so great and so true
It would grant us genuine happiness.
The kind of happiness only someone in their twenties can believe exists.
Real freedom from the constraints of the mind.

What is required for this assignment however,
Is impossible to obtain.
There is a restriction on this biological blob of atoms we call the body;
A restriction placed upon it from the moment it was spawned.

This restriction is Time.

From a ripple to the roar,
Of desires and desperations,
Hopes and aspirations.
With songs unsung, memories unseen,
Moves undanced, sights unblinked.
They riddle through a riling heart,
Languishing the clod of infinte memories,
Leaving behind a trail in oxblood,
On lanes of the suffering they imprint,
Never-failing pillars,
A Niagara of ambition,
Struggling and chasing,
The ring road of passion.

In this passage of arms,
The wants and these cries,
Shall put up a fight,
The first of its kind.
Moving every mountain,
Warming stiff snow,
Freezing the unforgiving fire,
Chocking the unmoving souls.
With a focus down unshaking roads,
They shall create a nexus,
With the nimbus, the whole universe,
To provoke the storms,
The thunder and the tides,
To hold their arms, to stay on their side,
In this endless unfailing ride.

With the mantra of victory,
And horse-like sight,
They come marching to lead you,
Down this one one life.
But in this march of time,
Through the years that crawl by,
Every road that you take,
Clinging onto dreams you've always dreamt,
Shall engulf a mist--
Some cocainic smoke,
That sting your eyes as they behold,
Your graceless retreat,
From closing doors.
Those million desires,
From burning heartaches,
Shall freeze and founder,
Fall and break.

Only leaves of paper,
Made by a dry-eyed stranger,
Doping human wants--
Most passionate minds.
Rendering them coarse and dud,
Cloudy and undone.
These leaves, they decide it all.
Your breaths, your wants,
The heartbeats, your wish grants---
The forest,
The ones who have most,
Shall foreshadow,
They can foretell,
The end of the roads they choose to take.
And those who have fragments,
A passive flow,
They know not where this journey,
Will allow them to go.
And yet they fight!
They give up their all!
But alas!
In this clientele of cliche,
Will breathe a cradle--
Will live the neverness of the niche,
That bears, where blooms,
From a dying ripple, to the fading roar,
Of desires and desperations,
Hopes and aspirations.
That will not live,
Oh! They die so slow...
As the pillars fall,
The Niagara runs cold.

G A S P!!!!!!!! I was breathing..  I looked around in darkness.. I felt no ground below me..  It was then I heard someone singing in the shadows..  With ever note and tone There was a light that was starting to get brighter and brighter..  Every note and tone was to be understood now as it truly was.. What they were was emotions..  Music is what emotions sound like..  Its what kept me alive in this infinte shadow.. Whomever sang to me was gone now..  The music was in my mind and soul now.. All I needed was just a memory of song.. The rest is easy now..  I create light with music and later an entire galaxy..  The center is where it all began.. From someone singing in the shadows to me.. Someone who was not lost in darkness.. Someone I think is darkness.. The darkness itself sang to me..

The universe,
In it's infinte glory,
Boils down to timing.

In the hazelnut swirls of her eye's
the secrets of the cosmos danced
and in the shadows
and curves of her lips
was the infinte truths of love
and in the song of her heart
I was to be forever lost
to wander with madness
as I fall
for the beauty
within her tattooed soul

sometimes,
I feel incomplete.

sometimes,
I need to be
                     here.

sometimes,
I wish I
                    could turn back
                                            to the days
                          
            I felt
                                                                                                                 *infinte