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"hauled" poems
the cockroach crouched against the tile while I was ******* and as I turned my head he hauled his **** into a crack. I got the can and sprayed and sprayed and sprayed and finally the roach came out and gave me a very ***** look. then he fell down into the bathtub and I watched him dying with a subtle pleasure because I paid rent and he didn't. I picked him up with some greenblue toilet paper and flushed him away. that's all there was to that, except around Hollywood and Western we have to keep doing it. they say some day that tribe is going to inherit the earth but we're going to make them wait a few months.
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cockroach
Reinaldo was the name they gave the great white elephant Who came to clear the jungles around Sao Paulo A clever notion that because Reinaldo was born in the jungle Any jungle would do just fine, Brazilian or Siamese made no difference Just as clever was the notion that because I was a black man, educated I would do just fine directing other black men to do work, English or Portuguese made no difference Was I truly so much a fool, twice over? Reinaldo occasionally was afflicted with slothfulness Some of the men thought it was from lack of **** and whip I was of a mind that it was due to lack of companionship It was costly enough to ship one giant beast across a great sea I left a wife, in Maryland, whom I never loved and who never loved me I admit before the plan was in motion I never considered that Reinaldo could have a family Sometimes, I wonder, did he have a wife who never loved him? Loneliness became a common theme in our new home away from home And Reinaldo and I became friends, at least I thought of him fondly As far as I could say, of all the men he responded best to me At times it seemed a load of lumber was hauled as a personal favor For the handler too soft to handle with fear and anger But as much as loneliness was a theme, so was change, and death The lifespan of an elephant compares to the lifespan of men Were this scheme of mine to have worked as desired I could have sent for a cow, and made Reinaldo a sire Soon it was revealed that slothfulness was a symptom of an elephant young, healthy and wise Who sensed not his own, but a friend's imminent demise Now I am left to wonder how Reinaldo will fare in a world stranger than I could have known His softest handler and only friend bedridden, waiting for my disease to take its final toll
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Jul 29, 2018
Jul 29, 2018 at 6:28 PM UTC
Reinaldo
Reinaldo was the name they gave the great white elephant Who came to clear the jungles around Sao Paulo A clever notion that because Reinaldo was born in the jungle Any jungle would do just fine, Brazilian or Siamese made no difference Just as clever was the notion that because I was a black man, educated I would do just fine directing other black men to do work, English or Portuguese made no difference Was I truly so much a fool, twice over? Reinaldo occasionally was afflicted with slothfulness Some of the men thought it was from lack of **** and whip I was of a mind that it was due to lack of companionship It was costly enough to ship one giant beast across a great sea I left a wife, in Maryland, whom I never loved and who never loved me I admit before the plan was in motion I never considered that Reinaldo could have a family Sometimes, I wonder, did he have a wife who never loved him? Loneliness became a common theme in our new home away from home And Reinaldo and I became friends, at least I thought of him fondly As far as I could say, of all the men he responded best to me At times it seemed a load of lumber was hauled as a personal favor For the handler too soft to handle with fear and anger But as much as loneliness was a theme, so was change, and death The lifespan of an elephant compares to the lifespan of men Were this scheme of mine to have worked as desired I could have sent for a cow, and made Reinaldo a sire Soon it was revealed that slothfulness was a symptom of an elephant young, healthy and wise Who sensed not his own, but a friend's imminent demise Now I am left to wonder how Reinaldo will fare in a world stranger than I could have known His softest handler and only friend bedridden, waiting for my disease to take its final toll
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27
Sleepmonger, deathmonger, with capsules in my palms each night, eight at a time from sweet pharmaceutical bottles I make arrangements for a pint-sized journey. I'm the queen of this condition. I'm an expert on making the trip and now they say I'm an addict. Now they ask why. WHY! Don't they know that I promised to die! I'm keeping in practice. I'm merely staying in shape. The pills are a mother, but better, every color and as good as sour ***** I'm on a diet from death. Yes, I admit it has gotten to be a bit of a habit- blows eight at a time, socked in the eye, hauled away by the pink, the orange, the green and the white goodnights. I'm becoming something of a chemical mixture. that's it! My supply of tablets has got to last for years and years. I like them more than I like me. It's a kind of marriage. It's a kind of war where I plant bombs inside of myself. Yes I try to **** myself in small amounts, an innocuous occupatin. Actually I'm hung up on it. But remember I don't make too much noise. And frankly no one has to lug me out and I don't stand there in my winding sheet. I'm a little buttercup in my yellow nightie eating my eight loaves in a row and in a certain order as in the laying on of hands or the black sacrament. It's a ceremony but like any other sport it's full of rules. It's like a musical tennis match where my mouth keeps catching the ball. Then I lie on; my altar elevated by the eight chemical kisses. What a lay me down this is with two pink, two orange, two green, two white goodnights. Fee-fi-fo-fum- Now I'm borrowed. Now I'm numb.
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The Addict
Sleepmonger, deathmonger, with capsules in my palms each night, eight at a time from sweet pharmaceutical bottles I make arrangements for a pint-sized journey. I'm the queen of this condition. I'm an expert on making the trip and now they say I'm an addict. Now they ask why. WHY! Don't they know that I promised to die! I'm keeping in practice. I'm merely staying in shape. The pills are a mother, but better, every color and as good as sour ***** I'm on a diet from death. Yes, I admit it has gotten to be a bit of a habit- blows eight at a time, socked in the eye, hauled away by the pink, the orange, the green and the white goodnights. I'm becoming something of a chemical mixture. that's it! My supply of tablets has got to last for years and years. I like them more than I like me. It's a kind of marriage. It's a kind of war where I plant bombs inside of myself. Yes I try to **** myself in small amounts, an innocuous occupatin. Actually I'm hung up on it. But remember I don't make too much noise. And frankly no one has to lug me out and I don't stand there in my winding sheet. I'm a little buttercup in my yellow nightie eating my eight loaves in a row and in a certain order as in the laying on of hands or the black sacrament. It's a ceremony but like any other sport it's full of rules. It's like a musical tennis match where my mouth keeps catching the ball. Then I lie on; my altar elevated by the eight chemical kisses. What a lay me down this is with two pink, two orange, two green, two white goodnights. Fee-fi-fo-fum- Now I'm borrowed. Now I'm numb.
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57
'Twas all so beautiful a sight, A long summers night; The sacred stars were burning bright about our mother moon. The wind filled the sails above the waves, that sped us through the sailors tales, and brought us to a deep lagoon. We cast our nets out far and wide, then watched them sink below the tide, which rattled out a tune for me and you. We hauled aboard the silver fish, to fill our bellies and our fists, then set off home with seagulls squawking tunes. The wooden boat now tied about the quay, its tattered sail and rusty cleat, gently tug and tug the rope upon the swell. come to sea! You know me well!!
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Feb 10, 2018
Feb 10, 2018 at 8:23 AM UTC
The little wooden boat
I. Neptune’s Theater A rock spins through the universal tumbler and its warm blue pools calcify as turquoise Neptune in his cloudy blue bath bath builds a lace castle with his fingertips Sculpts a submerged eden of crimson and emerald where painted parrots chat up cardinals butterfly and angel fry sway with wave pulse and foliated coral fingers beckon from arched windows. Neptune’s children are flat and bright, spined and notched free yet entangled in lace mesh ecosystem beneath an array of bioluminescent stars as a gangly pretender watches and blows bubbles. II. Sapien Siege The hot acidic hand of death grasps the mesh rends and tangles the ecosystem shattered reef’s loosed children scream beneath planet’s stars. Butterflies impaled cyanide-swooning damsels mesh-tangled angels hauled heavenward coral to potash, corpses to coal. The pretender to the throne blinks rubs blurry lenses, kicks plastic fins and moves on to the next show Unseeing and unaware of the luminous filament in his wake. Self-appointed divinity, deus ex machina. ******************************************************************************************* Ann says: All of the animal and human characters in this poem (except Neptune and The Pretender) are named after coral reef fish. Coral reefs, one of the most diverse ecosystems, are expected to be largely extinct within one human generation. Deus ex machina is Latin for “God from the machine.” Copyright 2013 by Ann Marcaida.
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Jan 23, 2013
Jan 23, 2013 at 3:43 PM UTC
Children of the Reef
Once it was garbage, refuse, trash. A jumble of foul-smelling detritus hauled to the curb And removed by sinewy men Contributing a harder day's work Than anyone else in the city. Our energy now removes its entropy. Sorted and classified into coloured bins, We add order to our rejected matter. Specialized trucks arrive to collect The date-synchronized bins Emptying them into functionally compatible mechanisms. Most desolate is the black box of paper and cardboard. Brochures and flyers, old magazines and letters. Annual reports and cereal boxes. Once these were enameled with crafted sentences, Painstakingly typed, edited and debated, On the monitors of copywriters. Now they are just millions of words printed on flattened fibre substrates, Jumbled into the bruised and scarred black box, Entering into the recycling stream. The nouns and adjectives, Prepositions and gerunds, All jumble together. Fragments of precisely-crafted sentences and paragraphs Are gradually broken, shredded and pulped. Incomplete thoughts, broken phrases Like those of a rejected stranger In an lonely, unknown country. Then words without context. Then just disparate letters Are all that remain. Their  M  ea  N inG G  r a Du all y is re mov e d .
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Aug 2, 2013
Aug 2, 2013 at 10:26 AM UTC
Waste Disposal
He misses me still, but that's old news. He's missed me for so long now - he can do it in his sleep. He does it while he eats alone at his desk, while he runs for a train, while the rain is coming down in sheets. While a girl takes off her dress and he reaches for her, his hands hesitate a decimal. He turns off the light, and misses me. It grows inside his chest, like a bonsai tree - something natural but stunted. Snipped and pruned carefully, but not allowed to grow outside it's box. Not allowed to put down roots. He hauled it off, across the sea. Across China and the Middle East, he misses me. Half a world apart, in Amsterdam I walk with my eyes to the ground, all brown and grey. Thinking of the planes and trains that bore him away. This has become second nature for me. It's midnight in Tokyo, he sits at his desk in the light from the street thinking of trees, canals, red bricks, me and when we sleep, he and I both, it's with ghosts in the sheets.
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Oct 9, 2014
Oct 9, 2014 at 6:16 AM UTC
Separation
In the rectory garden on his evening walk Paced brisk Father Shawn. A cold day, a sodden one it was In black November. After a sliding rain Dew stood in chill sweat on each stalk, Each thorn; spiring from wet earth, a blue haze Hung caught in dark-webbed branches like a fabulous heron. Hauled sudden from solitude, Hair prickling on his head, Father Shawn perceived a ghost Shaping itself from that mist. 'How now,' Father Shawn crisply addressed the ghost Wavering there, gauze-edged, smelling of woodsmoke, 'What manner of business are you on? From your blue pallor, I'd say you inhabited the frozen waste Of hell, and not the fiery part. Yet to judge by that dazzled look, That noble mien, perhaps you've late quitted heaven?' In voice furred with frost, Ghost said to priest: 'Neither of those countries do I frequent: Earth is my haunt.' 'Come, come,' Father Shawn gave an impatient shrug, 'I don't ask you to spin some ridiculous fable Of gilded harps or gnawing fire: simply tell After your life's end, what just epilogue God ordained to follow up your days. Is it such trouble To satisfy the questions of a curious old fool?' 'In life, love gnawed my skin To this white bone; What love did then, love does now: Gnaws me through.' 'What love,' asked Father Shawn, 'but too great love Of flawed earth-flesh could cause this sorry pass? Some ****** condition you are in: Thinking never to have left the world, you grieve As though alive, shriveling in torment thus To atone as shade for sin that lured blind man.' 'The day of doom Is not yest come. Until that time A crock of dust is my dear hom.' 'Fond phantom,' cried shocked Father Shawn, 'Can there be such stubbornness-- A soul grown feverish, clutching its dead body-tree Like a last storm-crossed leaf? Best get you gone To judgment in a higher court of grace. Repent, depart, before God's trump-crack splits the sky.' From that pale mist Ghost swore to priest: 'There sits no higher court Than man's red heart.'
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Dialogue Between Ghost And Priest
In the rectory garden on his evening walk Paced brisk Father Shawn. A cold day, a sodden one it was In black November. After a sliding rain Dew stood in chill sweat on each stalk, Each thorn; spiring from wet earth, a blue haze Hung caught in dark-webbed branches like a fabulous heron. Hauled sudden from solitude, Hair prickling on his head, Father Shawn perceived a ghost Shaping itself from that mist. 'How now,' Father Shawn crisply addressed the ghost Wavering there, gauze-edged, smelling of woodsmoke, 'What manner of business are you on? From your blue pallor, I'd say you inhabited the frozen waste Of hell, and not the fiery part. Yet to judge by that dazzled look, That noble mien, perhaps you've late quitted heaven?' In voice furred with frost, Ghost said to priest: 'Neither of those countries do I frequent: Earth is my haunt.' 'Come, come,' Father Shawn gave an impatient shrug, 'I don't ask you to spin some ridiculous fable Of gilded harps or gnawing fire: simply tell After your life's end, what just epilogue God ordained to follow up your days. Is it such trouble To satisfy the questions of a curious old fool?' 'In life, love gnawed my skin To this white bone; What love did then, love does now: Gnaws me through.' 'What love,' asked Father Shawn, 'but too great love Of flawed earth-flesh could cause this sorry pass? Some ****** condition you are in: Thinking never to have left the world, you grieve As though alive, shriveling in torment thus To atone as shade for sin that lured blind man.' 'The day of doom Is not yest come. Until that time A crock of dust is my dear hom.' 'Fond phantom,' cried shocked Father Shawn, 'Can there be such stubbornness-- A soul grown feverish, clutching its dead body-tree Like a last storm-crossed leaf? Best get you gone To judgment in a higher court of grace. Repent, depart, before God's trump-crack splits the sky.' From that pale mist Ghost swore to priest: 'There sits no higher court Than man's red heart.'
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50
Running amok black bellies of hail-clouds divest their hard cargo on near-ready harvest and thunder claps in spiteful applause. Scudding sails of racing white galleons arrive to the rescue and change weather's position as quiet breaches gale's disorder. Setting the sun throws magenta feathers across dark horizon and to settle the issue parades jade tints as the landscape transforms. Waiting small boats plod homewards in fish-laden formation while wives run to stoke hot-kettled fires of ready bath water. Lighting a pathway half-moon winks as heavier catches in hauled nets silver the harbour and men start night's final performance. Sating hunger with coming and going sow-and-reap women know the meaning of sharing male labour in scaling and salting chores. Fisher-folks' world begins and ends with the vagaries and quirks of weather.
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Jul 18, 2016
Jul 18, 2016 at 9:32 AM UTC
Begins and Ends.
All winter the fire devoured everything -- tear-stained elegies, old letters, diaries, dead flowers. When April finally arrived, I opened the woodstove one last time and shoveled the remains of those long cold nights into a bucket, ash rising through shafts of sunlight, as swirling in bright, angelic eddies. I shoveled out the charred end of an oak log, black and pointed like a pencil; half-burnt pages sacrificed in the making of poems; old, square handmade nails liberated from weathered planks split for kindling. I buried my hands in the bucket, found the nails, lifted them, the phoenix of my right hand shielded with soot and tar, my left hand shrouded in soft white ash -- nails in both fists like forged lightning. I smeared black lines on my face, drew crosses on my chest with the nails, raised my arms and stomped my feet, dancing in honor of spring and rebirth, dancing in honor of winter and death. I hauled the heavy bucket to the garden, spread ashes over the ground, asked the earth to be good. I gave the earth everything that pulled me through the lonely winter -- oak trees, barns, poems. I picked up my shovel and turned hard, gray dirt, the blade splitting winter from spring. With *** and rake, I cultivated soil, tilling row after row, the earth now loose and black. Tearing seed packets with my teeth, I sowed spinach with my right hand, planted petunias with my left. Lifting clumps of dirt, I crumbled them in my fists, loving each dark letter that fell from my fingers. And when I carried my empty bucket to the lake for water, a few last ashes rose into spring-morning air, ash drifting over fields dew-covered and lightly dusted green.
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Sacrifices
All winter the fire devoured everything -- tear-stained elegies, old letters, diaries, dead flowers. When April finally arrived, I opened the woodstove one last time and shoveled the remains of those long cold nights into a bucket, ash rising through shafts of sunlight, as swirling in bright, angelic eddies. I shoveled out the charred end of an oak log, black and pointed like a pencil; half-burnt pages sacrificed in the making of poems; old, square handmade nails liberated from weathered planks split for kindling. I buried my hands in the bucket, found the nails, lifted them, the phoenix of my right hand shielded with soot and tar, my left hand shrouded in soft white ash -- nails in both fists like forged lightning. I smeared black lines on my face, drew crosses on my chest with the nails, raised my arms and stomped my feet, dancing in honor of spring and rebirth, dancing in honor of winter and death. I hauled the heavy bucket to the garden, spread ashes over the ground, asked the earth to be good. I gave the earth everything that pulled me through the lonely winter -- oak trees, barns, poems. I picked up my shovel and turned hard, gray dirt, the blade splitting winter from spring. With *** and rake, I cultivated soil, tilling row after row, the earth now loose and black. Tearing seed packets with my teeth, I sowed spinach with my right hand, planted petunias with my left. Lifting clumps of dirt, I crumbled them in my fists, loving each dark letter that fell from my fingers. And when I carried my empty bucket to the lake for water, a few last ashes rose into spring-morning air, ash drifting over fields dew-covered and lightly dusted green.
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52
Fishermen at Ballyshannon Netted an infant last night Along with the salmon. An illegitimate spawning, A small one thrown back To the waters. But I'm sure As she stood in the shallows Ducking him tenderly Till the frozen knobs of her wrists Were dead as the gravel, He was a minnow with hooks Tearing her open. She waded in under The sign of the cross. He was hauled in with the fish. Now limbo will be A cold glitter of souls Through some far briny zone. Even Christ's palms, unhealed, Smart and cannot fish there.
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5.6k
Limbo
it’s confusing to me and maybe this is where the grooming, psychological abusing comes from. i’m used and discarded, tossed into the recycling bin until i’m reused again. and again. every time making me a little weaker than the time before. a little less able to refuse. a little easier to bend, to break. the lack of permanency in the place i long for, the place in which i never got to stay for long, only to be hauled away and returned upon further notice.
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Mar 31, 2022
Mar 31, 2022 at 7:00 AM UTC
sadistic tendencies
Beat-Up Old Car Vastly under-appreciated possession In dull blue, a MK1, no less, with original rust Inside lingering scents of Exchange and Mart top-notes of WD-40 and miscellaneous mix tapes A car like this gets into your life in lumpy knuckle-barking unsubtle ways, stays there in subtle ones That long drive back to Yorkshire in the quintessential exemplar Clutch cable snaps. ****** and Crap. Hardly helpful but can be accommodated with enough thought rough though it is on starter motor and nerves whenever anticipatory powers inadequate and we are forced to a complete red-light stop Brakes dodgier, exhaust noisier than ideal or legal Gender-ambiguous elderly tyres flirt outrageously with slick tarmac Showing their canvas underwear and male-pattern baldness Keeping this unstable, unsafe, unreliable ultimately essential lump of metal moving and on the road is a fine art Engaging, fluid and intense art; The Clash and The Specials Costello and The Cure in support A distraction then getting hauled over by plod somewhere near Bury St. Edmunds Thatcher's boys. Tax? MoT? Insurance? ID? No real interest shown Any passengers in the back? Clearly no.  Pickets?   Pickets? What? Please open the boot sir... Oh. On your way lad. Drive carefully I was, officer, I was More than you will ever know
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Feb 17, 2016
Feb 17, 2016 at 9:52 AM UTC
Memories of The Miners' Strike
Since time unknown I wanted a mutt No Lego, No Hershey , would make me stop A golden lab, only, could break the rut Which i could feed and sit atop. Mother worried for the allergies and the fleas, the constant bark, dirt and spit. I swore to keep him up in trees and silent like a lonely pit. We got a pup and named it Edison, he did not explicitly, discover electric light. All he had was poo and medicine No wonder his tummy was never right. Every time a **** he let away With each paw he dug to dig. At midnight as others lay He ate on like a pig. One night a robber, dull and round, hauled himself across the yard; And then onto some furry ground, where the cur lay, his fat splayed, somehow, somewhat, on guard. A brawl ensued, boy, there was blood! the thief bit him and he bit back. Now, i have two graves in the mud, of Edison and of Jack.
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Aug 23, 2014
Aug 23, 2014 at 11:45 PM UTC
Edison
Cold stoles the coast in geisha voiles of pawned Atlantic mourning, where The plangent skirl of larids carry through the vast exquisite plains of February emptiness. Aloft on coronal ruin, she flew in free form falling, between the spheres she grew in brightness, and by her stroke, the moping shale, appeared , as if transformed. She blessed the face of stained glass saints hung loud on hallowed walls, From a palisade of glinting brinks, she hauled deserted chapels into parishes of lambent wake their majesties , reborn.
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Mar 18, 2017
Mar 18, 2017 at 3:47 AM UTC
Awen
If there was a truck that hauled nothing but good luck in the back of its bed or maybe a tractor that carried happenstance in it’s bucket or a van which passengered devine kismet… I’d give them all a call and have them load and drive and haul it all to you - and dump nothing but good luck and fortune on you. All **** day.
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Jun 26, 2010
Jun 26, 2010 at 3:38 PM UTC
Good Luck Dump Truck
In my dream, drilling into the marrow of my entire bone, my real dream, I'm walking up and down Beacon Hill searching for a street sign -- namely MERCY STREET. Not there. I try the Back Bay. Not there. Not there. And yet I know the number. 45 Mercy Street. I know the stained-glass window of the foyer, the three flights of the house with its parquet floors. I know the furniture and mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, the servants. I know the cupboard of Spode the boat of ice, solid silver, where the butter sits in neat squares like strange giant's teeth on the big mahogany table. I know it well. Not there. Where did you go? 45 Mercy Street, with great-grandmother kneeling in her whale-bone corset and praying gently but fiercely to the wash basin, at five A.M. at noon dozing in her wiggy rocker, grandfather taking a nap in the pantry, grandmother pushing the bell for the downstairs maid, and Nana rocking Mother with an oversized flower on her forehead to cover the curl of when she was good and when she was... And where she was begat and in a generation the third she will beget, me, with the stranger's seed blooming into the flower called Horrid. I walk in a yellow dress and a white pocketbook stuffed with cigarettes, enough pills, my wallet, my keys, and being twenty-eight, or is it forty-five? I walk. I walk. I hold matches at street signs for it is dark, as dark as the leathery dead and I have lost my green Ford, my house in the suburbs, two little kids ****** up like pollen by the bee in me and a husband who has wiped off his eyes in order not to see my inside out and I am walking and looking and this is no dream just my oily life where the people are alibis and the street is unfindable for an entire lifetime. Pull the shades down -- I don't care! Bolt the door, mercy, erase the number, rip down the street sign, what can it matter, what can it matter to this cheapskate who wants to own the past that went out on a dead ship and left me only with paper? Not there. I open my pocketbook, as women do, and fish swim back and forth between the dollars and the lipstick. I pick them out, one by one and throw them at the street signs, and shoot my pocketbook into the Charles River. Next I pull the dream off and slam into the cement wall of the clumsy calendar I live in, my life, and its hauled up notebooks.
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3.6k
45 Mercy Street
In my dream, drilling into the marrow of my entire bone, my real dream, I'm walking up and down Beacon Hill searching for a street sign -- namely MERCY STREET. Not there. I try the Back Bay. Not there. Not there. And yet I know the number. 45 Mercy Street. I know the stained-glass window of the foyer, the three flights of the house with its parquet floors. I know the furniture and mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, the servants. I know the cupboard of Spode the boat of ice, solid silver, where the butter sits in neat squares like strange giant's teeth on the big mahogany table. I know it well. Not there. Where did you go? 45 Mercy Street, with great-grandmother kneeling in her whale-bone corset and praying gently but fiercely to the wash basin, at five A.M. at noon dozing in her wiggy rocker, grandfather taking a nap in the pantry, grandmother pushing the bell for the downstairs maid, and Nana rocking Mother with an oversized flower on her forehead to cover the curl of when she was good and when she was... And where she was begat and in a generation the third she will beget, me, with the stranger's seed blooming into the flower called Horrid. I walk in a yellow dress and a white pocketbook stuffed with cigarettes, enough pills, my wallet, my keys, and being twenty-eight, or is it forty-five? I walk. I walk. I hold matches at street signs for it is dark, as dark as the leathery dead and I have lost my green Ford, my house in the suburbs, two little kids ****** up like pollen by the bee in me and a husband who has wiped off his eyes in order not to see my inside out and I am walking and looking and this is no dream just my oily life where the people are alibis and the street is unfindable for an entire lifetime. Pull the shades down -- I don't care! Bolt the door, mercy, erase the number, rip down the street sign, what can it matter, what can it matter to this cheapskate who wants to own the past that went out on a dead ship and left me only with paper? Not there. I open my pocketbook, as women do, and fish swim back and forth between the dollars and the lipstick. I pick them out, one by one and throw them at the street signs, and shoot my pocketbook into the Charles River. Next I pull the dream off and slam into the cement wall of the clumsy calendar I live in, my life, and its hauled up notebooks.
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95
I launched her with my small remaining band and, putting out to sea, we set the main on that lone ship and said farewell to land. Far to starboard rose the coast of Spain, astern was Sardi, Islas at our bow, and soon we saw Morocco port abeam. Though I and comrades now were old and slow, we hauled till nightfall for the narrow sound where Hercules had shown what not to do, by setting marks for men to stay behind. At dawn the starboard lookout made Seville, and at the straits stood Ceuta t'other hand. 'Brothers,' I shouted, 'who have had the will to come through danger, and have reached the west! our time awake is brief from now until the senses die, and so I say we test the sun's own motion and do not forego the worlds beyond, unknown and peopleless. Think of the roots from which you sprang, and show that you are human: not unconscious brutes but made to follow virtue and to know.'
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3.6k
Ulysses' Last Voyage
this gravitational pull on my emotions is so strong that nothing can escape it. this blackhole is driving me insane. how can i find the light when all i see is darkness? this anxiety builds up an emotional pain. a battle between trying to escape and being hauled deeper. this plunge of happiness is driving me insane. how did i even get here in the first place? can somebody please ******* explain? infinitely i fall into the depths of depression. this hopeless feeling is driving me insane. for the first time in a long time i catch a glimpse of a familiar face. for a split second i finally feel sane. as i ask for help, i hear a murmur, “you’re here because of me.” this accumulation of agony inevitably drove me insane. all i did was care for you. how could you ever be so inhumane? -S.L.
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Nov 3, 2014
Nov 3, 2014 at 10:37 PM UTC
The Sanity of a Blackhole
When, like a running grave, time tracks you down, Your calm and cuddled is a scythe of hairs, Love in her gear is slowly through the house, Up naked stairs, a turtle in a hearse, Hauled to the dome, Comes, like a scissors stalking, tailor age, Deliver me who timid in my tribe, Of love am barer than Cadaver's trap Robbed of the foxy tongue, his footed tape Of the bone inch Deliver me, my masters, head and heart, Heart of Cadaver's candle waxes thin, When blood, spade-handed, and the logic time Drive children up like bruises to the thumb, From maid and head, For, sunday faced, with dusters in my glove, Chaste and the chaser, man with the cockshut eye, I, that time's jacket or the coat of ice May fail to fasten with a ****** o In the straight grave, Stride through Cadaver's country in my force, My pickbrain masters morsing on the stone Despair of blood faith in the maiden's slime, Halt among eunuchs, and the nitric stain On fork and face. Time is a foolish fancy, time and fool. No, no, you lover skull, descending hammer Descends, my masters, on the entered honour. You hero skull, Cadaver in the hangar Tells the stick, 'fail.' Joy is no knocking nation, sir and madam, The cancer's fashion, or the summer feather Lit on the cuddled tree, the cross of fever, Not city tar and subway bored to foster Man through macadam. I dump the waxlights in your tower dome. Joy is the knock of dust, Cadaver's shoot Of bud of Adam through his boxy shift, Love's twilit nation and the skull of state, Sir, is your doom. Everything ends, the tower ending and, (Have with the house of wind), the leaning scene, Ball of the foot depending from the sun, (Give, summer, over), the cemented skin, The actions' end. All, men my madmen, the unwholesome wind With whistler's cough contages, time on track Shapes in a cinder death; love for his trick, Happy Cadaver's hunger as you take The kissproof world.
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3.4k
When, Like A Running Grave
When, like a running grave, time tracks you down, Your calm and cuddled is a scythe of hairs, Love in her gear is slowly through the house, Up naked stairs, a turtle in a hearse, Hauled to the dome, Comes, like a scissors stalking, tailor age, Deliver me who timid in my tribe, Of love am barer than Cadaver's trap Robbed of the foxy tongue, his footed tape Of the bone inch Deliver me, my masters, head and heart, Heart of Cadaver's candle waxes thin, When blood, spade-handed, and the logic time Drive children up like bruises to the thumb, From maid and head, For, sunday faced, with dusters in my glove, Chaste and the chaser, man with the cockshut eye, I, that time's jacket or the coat of ice May fail to fasten with a ****** o In the straight grave, Stride through Cadaver's country in my force, My pickbrain masters morsing on the stone Despair of blood faith in the maiden's slime, Halt among eunuchs, and the nitric stain On fork and face. Time is a foolish fancy, time and fool. No, no, you lover skull, descending hammer Descends, my masters, on the entered honour. You hero skull, Cadaver in the hangar Tells the stick, 'fail.' Joy is no knocking nation, sir and madam, The cancer's fashion, or the summer feather Lit on the cuddled tree, the cross of fever, Not city tar and subway bored to foster Man through macadam. I dump the waxlights in your tower dome. Joy is the knock of dust, Cadaver's shoot Of bud of Adam through his boxy shift, Love's twilit nation and the skull of state, Sir, is your doom. Everything ends, the tower ending and, (Have with the house of wind), the leaning scene, Ball of the foot depending from the sun, (Give, summer, over), the cemented skin, The actions' end. All, men my madmen, the unwholesome wind With whistler's cough contages, time on track Shapes in a cinder death; love for his trick, Happy Cadaver's hunger as you take The kissproof world.
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50
Fay stood next to Baruch in the Square have a ride if you like on my new blue scooter he had said so she did with one foot placed firm on the scooter the other pushed away the hard ground moving on the scooter hands gripping the rubber handle bars and she sensed air in her face and hair moving fast Baruch left behind her in the Square he thinking how happy now she was moving on over ground other kids shouting out faster Fay and she did as if all pent up fears had gone bang and had then disappeared get off that Jew's scooter her father shouted out and she turned and the fears all returned she got off the scooter handed it to Baruch all joy gone happiness had dissolved her father gripped her hand hauled her off looking back at Baruch hatefully but Baruch merely smiled his contempt his green eyes or hazel as some said shooting off those arrows pretendingly in the **** of Fay's strict catholic father but to Fay he blew to her from his palm the unseen pink kisses of concern then she'd gone up the stairs to her fate a lecture against Jews murderers of Jesus he will say or worst still punishment a beating to enforce his strict will.
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Dec 31, 2013
Dec 31, 2013 at 3:01 AM UTC
HIS STRICT WILL.
Dans le fond des forêts votre image me suit. RACINE There is a panther stalks me down: One day I'll have my death of him; His greed has set the woods aflame, He prowls more lordly than the sun. Most soft, most suavely glides that step, Advancing always at my back; From gaunt hemlock, rooks croak havoc: The hunt is on, and sprung the trap. Flayed by thorns I trek the rocks, Haggard through the hot white noon. Along red network of his veins What fires run, what craving wakes? Insatiate, he ransacks the land Condemned by our ancestral fault, Crying: blood, let blood be spilt; Meat must glut his mouth's raw wound. Keen the rending teeth and sweet The singeing fury of his fur; His kisses parch, each paw's a briar, Doom consummates that appetite. In the wake of this fierce cat, Kindled like torches for his joy, Charred and ravened women lie, Become his starving body's bait. Now hills hatch menace, spawning shade; Midnight cloaks the sultry grove; The black marauder, hauled by love On fluent haunches, keeps my speed. Behind snarled thickets of my eyes Lurks the lithe one; in dreams' ambush Bright those claws that mar the flesh And hungry, hungry, those taut thighs. His ardor snares me, lights the trees, And I run flaring in my skin; What lull, what cool can lap me in When burns and brands that yellow gaze? I hurl my heart to halt his pace, To quench his thirst I squander blook; He eats, and still his need seeks food, Compels a total sacrifice. His voice waylays me, spells a trance, The gutted forest falls to ash; Appalled by secret want, I rush From such assault of radiance. Entering the tower of my fears, I shut my doors on that dark guilt, I bolt the door, each door I bolt. Blood quickens, gonging in my ears: The panther's tread is on the stairs, Coming up and up the stairs.
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Pursuit
Dans le fond des forêts votre image me suit. RACINE There is a panther stalks me down: One day I'll have my death of him; His greed has set the woods aflame, He prowls more lordly than the sun. Most soft, most suavely glides that step, Advancing always at my back; From gaunt hemlock, rooks croak havoc: The hunt is on, and sprung the trap. Flayed by thorns I trek the rocks, Haggard through the hot white noon. Along red network of his veins What fires run, what craving wakes? Insatiate, he ransacks the land Condemned by our ancestral fault, Crying: blood, let blood be spilt; Meat must glut his mouth's raw wound. Keen the rending teeth and sweet The singeing fury of his fur; His kisses parch, each paw's a briar, Doom consummates that appetite. In the wake of this fierce cat, Kindled like torches for his joy, Charred and ravened women lie, Become his starving body's bait. Now hills hatch menace, spawning shade; Midnight cloaks the sultry grove; The black marauder, hauled by love On fluent haunches, keeps my speed. Behind snarled thickets of my eyes Lurks the lithe one; in dreams' ambush Bright those claws that mar the flesh And hungry, hungry, those taut thighs. His ardor snares me, lights the trees, And I run flaring in my skin; What lull, what cool can lap me in When burns and brands that yellow gaze? I hurl my heart to halt his pace, To quench his thirst I squander blook; He eats, and still his need seeks food, Compels a total sacrifice. His voice waylays me, spells a trance, The gutted forest falls to ash; Appalled by secret want, I rush From such assault of radiance. Entering the tower of my fears, I shut my doors on that dark guilt, I bolt the door, each door I bolt. Blood quickens, gonging in my ears: The panther's tread is on the stairs, Coming up and up the stairs.
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52
Her name is Chang Champoo, translated as ‘Elephant Pink.’ Met on the street in tourist Thailand. 9 years old. 6 months pregnant. A beggar in an urban landscape. Hungry, grabbing sugar cane from my fingers. Desperate for food. Destined for an early grave. “Where are you from?” A question to her mahout, in Thai hauled from fragments of memory. “The border.” Seemingly obtuse but not really. Only one nearby. Burma. Elephants, born in captivity, used in logging, now unemployed. Teak forests of old but a distant memory. Did I only fuel her belly buying over-priced sugar cane? Or did I also fuel rampant exploitation of disadvantaged animals? Not everything in life Is black and white. Sometimes it is grey, This night it was Pink. How could I refuse her sustenance when confronted by those mournful pachyderm eyes. The question lingers…
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Jan 11, 2011
Jan 11, 2011 at 1:55 AM UTC
Elephant Pink
*This is a tribute to the man who believed in me and told me, "Fly. Spread your injured wings. I wanna see you F##king soar!"* I've woke up everyday dreading life as it ignored me seeing the different views and points I realized living is scary. I've thought of giving up not once, but twice or more sounds like it but I never gave in to the sleep I was promised I fought it like I was crazy. I thought I'd get high for once and stay at home relaxing sleeping through the pills I entered the world of virtual living. But that wasn't enough to rid me of Earth the core hauled me back into reality. My mind ceased to think and my thoughts, they turned into veggies. But thank you, sir, for the fuel I'm ready to go for once in a lifetime now I surely know where to go from here, the direction to face no matter the consequence that lies in place I've learned to follow the calling of my heart ignoring the cries of the world when I depart. The journey is the struggle between two realities finding what to bring, what to leave behind, that is my identity. The puzzles that fit will find their way to fill in the road that isn't my escape but rather to help me along the journey to Destiny. But just like Cinderella's shoe if it don't fit, it's not for me. This is my world now.
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Sep 26, 2014
Sep 26, 2014 at 9:38 PM UTC
Travel Far and Wide