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"hated" poems
good weather is like good women- it doesn't always happen and when it does it doesn't always last. man is more stable: if he's bad there's more chance he'll stay that way, or if he's good he might hang on, but a woman is changed by children age diet conversation *** the moon the absence or presence of sun or good times. a woman must be nursed into subsistence by love where a man can become stronger by being hated. I am drinking tonight in Spangler's Bar and I remember the cows I once painted in Art class and they looked good they looked better than anything in here. I am drinking in Spangler's Bar wondering which to love and which to hate, but the rules are gone: I love and hate only myself- they stand outside me like an orange dropped from the table and rolling away; it's what I've got to decide: **** myself or love myself? which is the treason? where's the information coming from? books...like broken glass: I wouldn't wipe my *** with 'em yet, it's getting darker, see? (we drink here and speak to each other and seem knowing.) buy the cow with the biggest **** buy the cow with the biggest **** present arms. the bartender slides me a beer it runs down the bar like an Olympic sprinter and the pair of pliers that is my hand stops it, lifts it, golden **** of dull temptation, I drink and stand there the weather bad for cows but my brush is ready to stroke up the green grass straw eye sadness takes me all over and I drink the beer straight down order a shot fast to give me the guts and the love to go on. from "poems written before jumping out of an 8 story window" - 1966
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Cows In Art Class
good weather is like good women- it doesn't always happen and when it does it doesn't always last. man is more stable: if he's bad there's more chance he'll stay that way, or if he's good he might hang on, but a woman is changed by children age diet conversation *** the moon the absence or presence of sun or good times. a woman must be nursed into subsistence by love where a man can become stronger by being hated. I am drinking tonight in Spangler's Bar and I remember the cows I once painted in Art class and they looked good they looked better than anything in here. I am drinking in Spangler's Bar wondering which to love and which to hate, but the rules are gone: I love and hate only myself- they stand outside me like an orange dropped from the table and rolling away; it's what I've got to decide: **** myself or love myself? which is the treason? where's the information coming from? books...like broken glass: I wouldn't wipe my *** with 'em yet, it's getting darker, see? (we drink here and speak to each other and seem knowing.) buy the cow with the biggest **** buy the cow with the biggest **** present arms. the bartender slides me a beer it runs down the bar like an Olympic sprinter and the pair of pliers that is my hand stops it, lifts it, golden **** of dull temptation, I drink and stand there the weather bad for cows but my brush is ready to stroke up the green grass straw eye sadness takes me all over and I drink the beer straight down order a shot fast to give me the guts and the love to go on. from "poems written before jumping out of an 8 story window" - 1966
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84
I  am facing yet another war, and I know you are too. So please know, This battle is worth fighting for you. I rather be loved by the outcasted, Then to be hated by the royalty. But I will always be a princess suited in metal armor. I promise to hold your hand and clense you of your wounds, I promise to always listen,  validate, and accept you no matter what weight, age, color, size, sexuality or diagnosis. I promise to always fight for your safe haven to become the world you live in. Even if you do not think you are worth it, I always will. Equality for all, Or equality for none.
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Mar 3, 2016
Mar 3, 2016 at 1:49 AM UTC
Last Note for the Fighters
Someone who means a great deal to me once said that you can’t find love. You can’t go searching for it, it finds you. It finds you out of nowhere and once it’s there you can’t ignore it. I thought that was a cute way of putting things and continued on with life, waiting for love to find me. But then I got impatient and tried to find it on my own, but it never happened. I was terrified of relationships for some unknown reason or past trauma, and I never found it. Until it found me. It steamrolled me completely out of nowhere and I didn’t see it coming. It was the worst and best thing that ever happened to me because it was beautiful to feel so deeply for someone and not feel any fear to let myself fall. For my best friend, someone I could spend hours talking to. Only you didn’t feel it too. Apparently you can ignore it, or maybe fate is sick and twisted and Cupid only hit me. So I love you. I love you and I can’t stop and it absolutely ***** because you don’t feel the same way for me. I know even if you did we’d never work out and yet if you sat me down and tried to convince me of all the reasons we would always be wrong for each other and never right, I wouldn’t be able to stop. Trust me, I wish I could. I wish I hated you instead, or just didn’t care at all. But I can’t stop. You could break my heart ten times over and I wouldn’t be able to stop. I don’t understand why but it’s just a fact. I’ll always wonder why I’m not good enough or if maybe you’ll ever change your mind. Maybe one day I’ll stop, finally get over it, but for now I’m stuck here never being able to get over you. I can’t move on, I can’t stop hurting, I can’t stop loving you. I don’t know that I’ll ever feel this way about someone again, or if I manage to get over you if I even want to, because I don’t ever want to be crushed like this again. Because I love you. And you don’t love me.
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Mar 24, 2021
Mar 24, 2021 at 1:03 AM UTC
Monologue of Unrequited Love
Someone who means a great deal to me once said that you can’t find love. You can’t go searching for it, it finds you. It finds you out of nowhere and once it’s there you can’t ignore it. I thought that was a cute way of putting things and continued on with life, waiting for love to find me. But then I got impatient and tried to find it on my own, but it never happened. I was terrified of relationships for some unknown reason or past trauma, and I never found it. Until it found me. It steamrolled me completely out of nowhere and I didn’t see it coming. It was the worst and best thing that ever happened to me because it was beautiful to feel so deeply for someone and not feel any fear to let myself fall. For my best friend, someone I could spend hours talking to. Only you didn’t feel it too. Apparently you can ignore it, or maybe fate is sick and twisted and Cupid only hit me. So I love you. I love you and I can’t stop and it absolutely ***** because you don’t feel the same way for me. I know even if you did we’d never work out and yet if you sat me down and tried to convince me of all the reasons we would always be wrong for each other and never right, I wouldn’t be able to stop. Trust me, I wish I could. I wish I hated you instead, or just didn’t care at all. But I can’t stop. You could break my heart ten times over and I wouldn’t be able to stop. I don’t understand why but it’s just a fact. I’ll always wonder why I’m not good enough or if maybe you’ll ever change your mind. Maybe one day I’ll stop, finally get over it, but for now I’m stuck here never being able to get over you. I can’t move on, I can’t stop hurting, I can’t stop loving you. I don’t know that I’ll ever feel this way about someone again, or if I manage to get over you if I even want to, because I don’t ever want to be crushed like this again. Because I love you. And you don’t love me.
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9
I've always hated winter But the beauty of this snowfall Made me love this winter wonderland
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Nov 28, 2014
Nov 28, 2014 at 12:31 PM UTC
Snowflake Love
I started drinking coffee, not because I enjoyed the taste, or even the burst of energy it gave me late at night, but simply because you loved it. Always seen with that coffee stained smile. I hated it though. I had hated its bitter taste that no amount of sugar or cream could sweeten. I had hated the way it scorched my mouth and throat as I slowly gulped down the warm liquid. But I drank it. Every morning and night, tricking my mind into thinking I liked it. You soon moved on from my try-to-hard self, and left me all alone, with a coffee stained frown.
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Jul 6, 2018
Jul 6, 2018 at 12:59 PM UTC
Coffee mind
I broke up with McDonalds On Valentine's day People said she was no good for me I had to get away So I told her, It's not you, It's just a phase I'm going through But as we all know - Dumping fast food is not a pleasant thing to do. So I broke up with McDonalds, didn't see her for a while Was doing pretty well - there was the occasional drunk-dial When I walked up to the window And I slipped into the queue - But then I came back to my senses And realised the thing to do... Was to keep on walking Keep on walking Right past her Ignore the temptation To suckle On those golden arches Ignore those bed-like burgers And those oh-so-easy fries Divide our shared world up And sever all ties! Yes! I broke up with McDonalds and my life is better for it When my girlfriend serves up rabbit food I simply adore it I was scared of life alone with no kebab to walk me home But...       What I once spent on burgers...                                                      I now spend on...                                                                                  Haribo! Oh Haribo! Haribo!   You are a fruit tree in a sack And although it feels wrong to see you Behind my girlfriend's back She can not be hurt by wrongs she does not know! No - the new love of my life is Haribo, oh Haribo! But then one evening after work My girfriend came home early. Caught me curled up on the couch   Soaking up her girly   DVDs In front of me A bowl of Not nuts, nor seeds... But fizzy, yes fizzy, Cola bottles   That were   FIZZY! How could you do this? My girlfriend screamed at me. Cannot you see the damage that they do-eth to your teeth? (She'd been reading Shakespeare) No, my eyes are on my face, I can't see in my mouth. Right, she said, If you think I'm joking then I'm going to kick you out. So she kicked me out the flat and that was that she said. Not quite... I grabbed my stash of Haribo from underneath the bed. I told her all the things about her that I really hated And the moral is: Relationships with things that you can't eat are over-rated.
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Feb 20, 2011
Feb 20, 2011 at 2:52 PM UTC
McDonalds
I broke up with McDonalds On Valentine's day People said she was no good for me I had to get away So I told her, It's not you, It's just a phase I'm going through But as we all know - Dumping fast food is not a pleasant thing to do. So I broke up with McDonalds, didn't see her for a while Was doing pretty well - there was the occasional drunk-dial When I walked up to the window And I slipped into the queue - But then I came back to my senses And realised the thing to do... Was to keep on walking Keep on walking Right past her Ignore the temptation To suckle On those golden arches Ignore those bed-like burgers And those oh-so-easy fries Divide our shared world up And sever all ties! Yes! I broke up with McDonalds and my life is better for it When my girlfriend serves up rabbit food I simply adore it I was scared of life alone with no kebab to walk me home But...       What I once spent on burgers...                                                      I now spend on...                                                                                  Haribo! Oh Haribo! Haribo!   You are a fruit tree in a sack And although it feels wrong to see you Behind my girlfriend's back She can not be hurt by wrongs she does not know! No - the new love of my life is Haribo, oh Haribo! But then one evening after work My girfriend came home early. Caught me curled up on the couch   Soaking up her girly   DVDs In front of me A bowl of Not nuts, nor seeds... But fizzy, yes fizzy, Cola bottles   That were   FIZZY! How could you do this? My girlfriend screamed at me. Cannot you see the damage that they do-eth to your teeth? (She'd been reading Shakespeare) No, my eyes are on my face, I can't see in my mouth. Right, she said, If you think I'm joking then I'm going to kick you out. So she kicked me out the flat and that was that she said. Not quite... I grabbed my stash of Haribo from underneath the bed. I told her all the things about her that I really hated And the moral is: Relationships with things that you can't eat are over-rated.
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61
1227 My Triumph lasted till the Drums Had left the Dead alone And then I dropped my Victory And chastened stole along To where the finished Faces Conclusion turned on me And then I hated Glory And wished myself were They. What is to be is best descried When it has also been— Could Prospect taste of Retrospect The tyrannies of Men Were Tenderer—diviner The Transitive toward. A Bayonet’s contrition Is nothing to the Dead.
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My Triumph lasted till the Drums
My little friend is now gone My tragic life must go on; despite that His evil eyes and his cheeky smile still burn in my mind He no longer exists except For my memory of him And I rejoiced When I heard the news Still I can recall how I sobbed When he gave me his evil eye for the first time When he hurled glass and other projectiles at me when he was hungry When he spent hours upon hours pondering the fabric of society I hated him I wished For his death I was depressed It was like paint peeling off a wall It was like finding a dead leprechaun at the end of a rainbow I was expecting some sort of remorse when he left Funny how heartbreak works Now read this in reverse Because sometimes all you need Is a little change of perspective To truly understand someone
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Jul 18, 2018
Jul 18, 2018 at 12:28 PM UTC
My Little Friend
I was a caterpillar , before I became a butterfly . The pain I had to endure in order to transform into the beauty I am today . This is my tale . In the forest there was, My cocoon wrapped in the finest silk, With a power to live in a colorful world. To dream and conquer goals. A Vivacious soul spinning in the purest silk Growing and maturing as I spun. Wishing for freedom with my beautiful wings, Counting the days to be free and soar as a lively butterfly until You winded into my community Lured my queen and her uneven monarch. Tempted to sabotage my purity. For that you, Lured yourself into my vulernable cocoon with that trust, you decided to disrupt my process. How can one man ruin my nesting site? And I had faith in you , to be a figure I never had. I wanted. My heart ached for it. I needed it. To be loved . To be nurtured. To never be like those stray dogs looking for a home. This was the moment . Where.... Innocence stripped, heart captured. My Freedom gone. You were naive to comprehend On what you were doing... You would stab my cocoon with your sickening poison . Over and over you stabbed . Ruptured the veins of my innocence . To break my finest silk . Purity banished. Stabbing your poison was Making my cocoon useless , worthless , unwanted, colorless, I tried to run and I tried to scream but I was devoured by this poison It was the love I deserve. Couldn't escape , numb to the pain For every poison injected, I began to Question God? Where was he ? when I shed out a tear of help. Where was he? when my cocoon was destroyed. Was I loved God? when I muffled help in your name. I hated myself , I stay in my cocoon afraid to see my future. I wasn't going to be a beautiful butterfly Battered Butterfly My life seemed to be colorless No one wants a battered butterfly My life.... It seemed it had ended when poison sunk onto my helpless body . No one wants a battered butterfly Imprisoned to these chains. Being poisoned every night by different Predators. Oh God.... Those predators ... Battered lifeless little butterfly Was I ever loved in my nesting site? But then again nobody loves a battered butterfly How can I reach to heaven when I was worthless. Believed I was a vile ***** Tricked into a poison of hell. Battered Ugly Butterfly ***** Little butterfly*. There was no light in tunnel There was no holes in my silk To escape this poisonous nest. Why? Because I believe nobody wants save a battered butterfly How can the man I trusted ruined me. I thought you could be the one to complete my lovely monarch . To complete the missing piece. But you continued to misuse me. To haunt me. To barricade my heart To own my soul But one thing I can truly say You never once won over me. You never imprinted my change. I endured your pain That was a sign of God To show me what strength I am capable of. That was the light that I found, You had no control to inflict pain anymore. Because I became impervious to your pain. I am a beautiful butterfly reigning over my monarch with no thought of you. That is my freedom
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May 4, 2015
May 4, 2015 at 2:25 AM UTC
Battered Butterfly
I was a caterpillar , before I became a butterfly . The pain I had to endure in order to transform into the beauty I am today . This is my tale . In the forest there was, My cocoon wrapped in the finest silk, With a power to live in a colorful world. To dream and conquer goals. A Vivacious soul spinning in the purest silk Growing and maturing as I spun. Wishing for freedom with my beautiful wings, Counting the days to be free and soar as a lively butterfly until You winded into my community Lured my queen and her uneven monarch. Tempted to sabotage my purity. For that you, Lured yourself into my vulernable cocoon with that trust, you decided to disrupt my process. How can one man ruin my nesting site? And I had faith in you , to be a figure I never had. I wanted. My heart ached for it. I needed it. To be loved . To be nurtured. To never be like those stray dogs looking for a home. This was the moment . Where.... Innocence stripped, heart captured. My Freedom gone. You were naive to comprehend On what you were doing... You would stab my cocoon with your sickening poison . Over and over you stabbed . Ruptured the veins of my innocence . To break my finest silk . Purity banished. Stabbing your poison was Making my cocoon useless , worthless , unwanted, colorless, I tried to run and I tried to scream but I was devoured by this poison It was the love I deserve. Couldn't escape , numb to the pain For every poison injected, I began to Question God? Where was he ? when I shed out a tear of help. Where was he? when my cocoon was destroyed. Was I loved God? when I muffled help in your name. I hated myself , I stay in my cocoon afraid to see my future. I wasn't going to be a beautiful butterfly Battered Butterfly My life seemed to be colorless No one wants a battered butterfly My life.... It seemed it had ended when poison sunk onto my helpless body . No one wants a battered butterfly Imprisoned to these chains. Being poisoned every night by different Predators. Oh God.... Those predators ... Battered lifeless little butterfly Was I ever loved in my nesting site? But then again nobody loves a battered butterfly How can I reach to heaven when I was worthless. Believed I was a vile ***** Tricked into a poison of hell. Battered Ugly Butterfly ***** Little butterfly*. There was no light in tunnel There was no holes in my silk To escape this poisonous nest. Why? Because I believe nobody wants save a battered butterfly How can the man I trusted ruined me. I thought you could be the one to complete my lovely monarch . To complete the missing piece. But you continued to misuse me. To haunt me. To barricade my heart To own my soul But one thing I can truly say You never once won over me. You never imprinted my change. I endured your pain That was a sign of God To show me what strength I am capable of. That was the light that I found, You had no control to inflict pain anymore. Because I became impervious to your pain. I am a beautiful butterfly reigning over my monarch with no thought of you. That is my freedom
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112
Maybe that's why I'm hated.
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Apr 28, 2014
Apr 28, 2014 at 3:35 PM UTC
I Guess I Have a Bad Personality?
Small and insignificant... Inferior. Insecure and shameful... Clumsy. Weak and sad... Molested. Unremarkable and transparent... Mundane. Unlovable and ugly... Hated. Remedial and simple... Stupid. Angry and jealous... Loathsome. Lovesick and lonely... Desperate. Sick and Tired... Old. Unstable and self-destructive... Insane. Vulnerable and trusting... Suicidal. Hopes and dreams... Deteriorating. Smiling and Laughter... Remedy. Heidi Shavill 2008
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Jan 21, 2013
Jan 21, 2013 at 3:59 AM UTC
Pathetic
Love is the essence where roses live with thorns no one rejected no one hated and fragrance spreads everywhere
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Apr 5, 2015
Apr 5, 2015 at 11:32 AM UTC
THORNS WITH ROSES
Reunited Walking down a path, where no man should ever go, its dark, cold, damp and I'm moving very slow. Feeling the walls that are covered in slime, too many things happening at the same time. So much hidden deep down in my soul, not sure if I can escape this black hole. Things I've done can never be told, Sometimes life gets put on hold. If only these things, I could mention, it would relieve so much tension. So many things, I just can't say, if I did I'd be put so far away. I've reached the point of no return, next one who gets in my way, I'm gonna burn. Getting more angry by the minute, bought some guns in case I have to shoot. This giant duffle bag is getting quite heavy, I wish I still had my 57 Chevy. Back then life was great, Wife, kids, house, fence with a gate. Then one stormy night, a car went off the road, since that night my brain started to overload. Fell into a deep depression, lost my job, thanks to the recession. Lost my house, lost my car, all my dreams are now to far. Walked into the place, I used to work, hated my boss, he was such a **** Grabbed my guns and started to shoot, all the blood was staring to pollute. Shot as many as I possibly could, don't know why, just thought I should. Losing everything drove me insane, I'm not making excuses for my brain. Not long after there were hundreds of police, there was no offering of a sign of peace. They barged in and I resisted arrest, I was shot several times in the chest. I wanted to die, but always in style, all I could see was my families smile. Now we're back all reunited, I have never been more delighted. No one I shot that day ended up dying, just some blood and a lot of crying.
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Sep 17, 2013
Sep 17, 2013 at 12:14 PM UTC
Reunited
Reunited Walking down a path, where no man should ever go, its dark, cold, damp and I'm moving very slow. Feeling the walls that are covered in slime, too many things happening at the same time. So much hidden deep down in my soul, not sure if I can escape this black hole. Things I've done can never be told, Sometimes life gets put on hold. If only these things, I could mention, it would relieve so much tension. So many things, I just can't say, if I did I'd be put so far away. I've reached the point of no return, next one who gets in my way, I'm gonna burn. Getting more angry by the minute, bought some guns in case I have to shoot. This giant duffle bag is getting quite heavy, I wish I still had my 57 Chevy. Back then life was great, Wife, kids, house, fence with a gate. Then one stormy night, a car went off the road, since that night my brain started to overload. Fell into a deep depression, lost my job, thanks to the recession. Lost my house, lost my car, all my dreams are now to far. Walked into the place, I used to work, hated my boss, he was such a **** Grabbed my guns and started to shoot, all the blood was staring to pollute. Shot as many as I possibly could, don't know why, just thought I should. Losing everything drove me insane, I'm not making excuses for my brain. Not long after there were hundreds of police, there was no offering of a sign of peace. They barged in and I resisted arrest, I was shot several times in the chest. I wanted to die, but always in style, all I could see was my families smile. Now we're back all reunited, I have never been more delighted. No one I shot that day ended up dying, just some blood and a lot of crying.
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45
Birthed by altruism or selfishness, Motivated by personal gain Or the forfeiting of a nation; It's the betrayal of friends, Country, cause and trust. Cassius, Judas, Benedict Arnold, The traitor has many personas. Traitors are hated by those they prefer. (Tacitus) *I forgive those who ****** and steal, but a traitor, never.* (Zapata) *A nation cannot survive treason from within... He rots the soul of a nation... No wise man ever thought a traitor should be trusted.* (Cicero) Softness to traitors will destroy us all. (Robespierre) An open enemy, however criminal, is no traitor. (Spooner) To have a traitor as an ally is to have an enemy in waiting. (Carey) *It is the just decree of heaven that a traitor never sees his danger till his ruin is at hand.* (Metastasia) There are but two parties now... traitors and patriots. (U.S. Grant) *If I had one bullet and I was faced by both enemy and traitor, I would let the traitor have it.* (Codreanue) There is a special place in hell reserved for traitors. (J. Trudeau) *Every man must be for the U.S. or against it. There can be no neutrals... only patriots or traitors.* (S. Douglas) Et tu, POTUS. (F. Lynch)
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Jul 17, 2018
Jul 17, 2018 at 8:16 AM UTC
Traitor
Dandelions Hair was long and yellow like pale dandelions; Complimenting blue eyes, and white skin. I was drawn into such rare beauty, such new and unexplored mystery. New girl in town, a new taste of envy in the air. I befriended you; I wasn't so quick to judge. I studied you closely. I gained your friendship quickly. I came to know you, and the worst parts of you. You lied so beautifully; Manipulation to a fine perfection.   Still I followed you, opened my heart up and fell weak. You used me all up. Drained me out; Out of patience, out of friendship, out of love. Everybody hated you. They still hate you, and now I do too.
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Aug 27, 2013
Aug 27, 2013 at 2:25 AM UTC
Dandelions
Dear Ex-Best Friend, Remember all the times we spent together, everyday started with meeting before classes started because that was the only time we could talk until lunch, remember all the times we laughed so hard we cried? Do you remember all the times we had to hold one another in times of the need because we thought all we had was each other? Yeah.. Me too. We spent all the time in the world texting and calling each other. Things changed a little since I got a boyfriend, but I never replaced you. You always had a special place in my heart, and I think you always knew that. We drifted apart, like two boats at sea. You switched back to the school you came from, and it felt like my life had just sunk. Suddenly I was all alone in the hallways, Coming in to school was like hell, Seeing the spot we used to stand in, Occupied by another set of best friends, Or maybe two high school sweethearts- Making out like there's no one around. It was so lonely without you. You seemed happier where you were though, and at that time, that was all that mattered to me. I walked the hallways with a sad, sorrowful look. Teachers frequently asked if I was sick, or if I needed to lay down. Suddenly I was that one kid that everyone wanted to pick and beat on. (Again.) I was incredibly lonely at school, I couldn't even sit with anyone at lunch because I was so hated by so many people for reasons I didn't even know. Come upon my junior year I got a month and a half into the school year before I switched to the school that you went to. I was reunited with my best friend, Life seemed so good. I was with my boyfriend, and my bestfriend. It felt like nothing could stop me from gaining happiness. You began going through boyfriends, They would come, and they would go. I was put second to all of them. There were days I was so depressed I didn't function correctly, and all we would talk about is what you and your boyfriend did the previous night. I was so happy that you were happy, but I think I forgot the definition of "Happiness." Everyday was full of being ignored and having guys' push past me so they could hug you while I sat in the sideline just waiting there, tears filling in my eyes because I realized that I wasn't significant to my best friend any more. I couldn't help but wonder what I did wrong. I got tired of feeling this way, I grew up, and realized that highschool isn't meant for gaining the love and affection of people. I proceeded to end the friendship because it wasn't making me happy anymore. I understand that a true friend stays there through everything but in no way, shape, or form did I deserve to be kicked to the curb like a diseased puppy. It hurt, It hurt like a ***** But ultimately , I'm gonna be okay in the end. And I hope she ends up okay, too. But, just be okay without me.
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May 25, 2017
May 25, 2017 at 8:30 AM UTC
Dear Ex-Best Friend.
Dear Ex-Best Friend, Remember all the times we spent together, everyday started with meeting before classes started because that was the only time we could talk until lunch, remember all the times we laughed so hard we cried? Do you remember all the times we had to hold one another in times of the need because we thought all we had was each other? Yeah.. Me too. We spent all the time in the world texting and calling each other. Things changed a little since I got a boyfriend, but I never replaced you. You always had a special place in my heart, and I think you always knew that. We drifted apart, like two boats at sea. You switched back to the school you came from, and it felt like my life had just sunk. Suddenly I was all alone in the hallways, Coming in to school was like hell, Seeing the spot we used to stand in, Occupied by another set of best friends, Or maybe two high school sweethearts- Making out like there's no one around. It was so lonely without you. You seemed happier where you were though, and at that time, that was all that mattered to me. I walked the hallways with a sad, sorrowful look. Teachers frequently asked if I was sick, or if I needed to lay down. Suddenly I was that one kid that everyone wanted to pick and beat on. (Again.) I was incredibly lonely at school, I couldn't even sit with anyone at lunch because I was so hated by so many people for reasons I didn't even know. Come upon my junior year I got a month and a half into the school year before I switched to the school that you went to. I was reunited with my best friend, Life seemed so good. I was with my boyfriend, and my bestfriend. It felt like nothing could stop me from gaining happiness. You began going through boyfriends, They would come, and they would go. I was put second to all of them. There were days I was so depressed I didn't function correctly, and all we would talk about is what you and your boyfriend did the previous night. I was so happy that you were happy, but I think I forgot the definition of "Happiness." Everyday was full of being ignored and having guys' push past me so they could hug you while I sat in the sideline just waiting there, tears filling in my eyes because I realized that I wasn't significant to my best friend any more. I couldn't help but wonder what I did wrong. I got tired of feeling this way, I grew up, and realized that highschool isn't meant for gaining the love and affection of people. I proceeded to end the friendship because it wasn't making me happy anymore. I understand that a true friend stays there through everything but in no way, shape, or form did I deserve to be kicked to the curb like a diseased puppy. It hurt, It hurt like a ***** But ultimately , I'm gonna be okay in the end. And I hope she ends up okay, too. But, just be okay without me.
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50
Narcolepsy hard and heavy watch me fall asleep Lulled to bed in a cunning thread of the tangled web we weave I dream in pristine colors, windows of my mind anew No fingerprints or ***** looks or evidence of you I find comfort in forever wherever it may be I may have left my home but it will always stay with me The smell of all the smoke with the sound of all the rain On constant playback every second deep within my brain I found that time is all that matters and everything else faded I spent years and years learning how to forget everything I hated I've only gotten older and have nothing left to show Except a ringing alarm clock and blood on my pillow Narcolepsy hard and heavy watch me as I sleep Another pill, another high, another date to keep If I shall die before I wake, I hope that I'm with you Then it won't matter where I go, cause you will see me through
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Jan 23, 2016
Jan 23, 2016 at 12:20 PM UTC
Narcolepsy
I have a message For you haters You're the wreckage Your words like razors No longer shall I keel To your decimating attitude I have an intransigent zeal Of undeniable magnitude Your reign of terror Now a speck in the past Your puppet strings I sever Now free I feel, at last I dare you, I dare you Try to cut me down But be warned, I will strew Your face all over the ground No longer am i afraid. All the hated, it's time to stand All the haters, it's time to be repaid No more worries, just grains of sand The tides now change Deny them their satisfaction Their power has no range Haters, this is your termination
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Apr 23, 2014
Apr 23, 2014 at 8:03 AM UTC
Haters Termination
I had my first dream last night that you weren't in. not even a minor character, your ****** name wasn't even in the credits, let alone plastered across the sky in flashing lights like you want it to be. my first reality that you didn't belong in, and it was the most blissful peace that I can remember since we bathed in pools of cloud. I heard the first song that didn't make me think of you yesterday. the lyrics, for once, were just lyrics, not an embodiment of you and the things you do. guess what? it was coldplay. you always hated coldplay. this morning, I basked in the sun and didn't picture you coated in gold light beside me. I didn't look at the leaves adorning the trees and picture your face laughing beneath it. I didn't trace the plate lines of my palm and imagine the earthquake we used to create when yours collided with mine. I didn't eat new food that I wanted you to try and I didn't want to share the smallest details of my day with you. you may have won this poem, loverboy, but don't be too triumphant. your victory won't last long. it's the era of my new beginnings without you and I'm going to be just fine.
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Jun 10, 2018
Jun 10, 2018 at 8:04 AM UTC
the first poem not about you
This one goes to the real poets. To those who decide to carry the world on their own. To those who carry hell in their head and a graveyard of lost love stories in their heart To the brave ones who fight darkness with darkness. Tho those who the only answer they seek from a god is if there's eternal life for their loved ones, because they know there's no space for them in that paradise. To those who know that suffering is the most humane feeling there is. To those who loved and hated the wrong person. This goes to Lorca isolated, hiding in a closet in New York. To Unamuno craving to believe in something impossible. To Quiroga drinking the poison of his sorrow at a hospital. To Becquer and Espino for dying so young. To Neruda for cheating on himself so many times. To Machados' lost spirit. To Marquez and his melancholic ****** To Poe's tormented soul and his raven. To Shakespeare and his Juliet. To Dante and his story of woe. This goes for the only beings who can live with a hell inside of them, and still manage to write heavenly things for those in need to read. This one's for us.
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Nov 14, 2015
Nov 14, 2015 at 7:33 PM UTC
This One Is For Us
Way back when I was younger I was mistaken as a dude They asked all sorts of questions That slowly grew more rude "Why don't you wear makeup? Or dress in something nice?" "If you ever want to get a guy Why won't you just take our advice?" When I began in high school I had just begun to change I had bought myself some cheap makeup And clothes that just felt strange Still, it wasn't enough though The insults continued to come "Ugly. Lazy. Undesirable" It all began to make me glum By the beginning of junior year I had fully given in Dresses replaced all of my jeans And makeup covered all my skin It was then, the insults changed And people began to glare Said I "cared too much about my looks" And my "head must be full of air" I still always got straight A's The way I talked was still the same But though I knew that they were wrong Their comments made me feel lame When senior year had rolled around I was lonely as could be People "liked" what I'd become But I felt no one liked me for me I'd never been on a single date Because all the guys were crude So it was only a small amount of time Before I was labeled as a ***** When I finally started college I expected something more But people took one look at me And labeled me a ***** I had not been sleeping around I still hadn't even been on a date Everyone just made assumptions And looked at me with hate The part that was most ironic Was that after all these years Of changing to be whatever they said I was still hated by all my peers I didn't want to dress like this I didn't want to just conform But there is only so much a person can take Before they need to fit the "norm" Society is what destroyed me They are the reason I am this way I changed to be what people wanted Now I understand: I'll never see that day I don't know who I am now Though everyone else thinks that they do Now please just take one piece of advice It's so important to just stay you You are perfect just as you are So continue to stay strong Remember no matter what they tell you What society says is wrong
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Apr 24, 2015
Apr 24, 2015 at 3:26 PM UTC
Identity
Way back when I was younger I was mistaken as a dude They asked all sorts of questions That slowly grew more rude "Why don't you wear makeup? Or dress in something nice?" "If you ever want to get a guy Why won't you just take our advice?" When I began in high school I had just begun to change I had bought myself some cheap makeup And clothes that just felt strange Still, it wasn't enough though The insults continued to come "Ugly. Lazy. Undesirable" It all began to make me glum By the beginning of junior year I had fully given in Dresses replaced all of my jeans And makeup covered all my skin It was then, the insults changed And people began to glare Said I "cared too much about my looks" And my "head must be full of air" I still always got straight A's The way I talked was still the same But though I knew that they were wrong Their comments made me feel lame When senior year had rolled around I was lonely as could be People "liked" what I'd become But I felt no one liked me for me I'd never been on a single date Because all the guys were crude So it was only a small amount of time Before I was labeled as a ***** When I finally started college I expected something more But people took one look at me And labeled me a ***** I had not been sleeping around I still hadn't even been on a date Everyone just made assumptions And looked at me with hate The part that was most ironic Was that after all these years Of changing to be whatever they said I was still hated by all my peers I didn't want to dress like this I didn't want to just conform But there is only so much a person can take Before they need to fit the "norm" Society is what destroyed me They are the reason I am this way I changed to be what people wanted Now I understand: I'll never see that day I don't know who I am now Though everyone else thinks that they do Now please just take one piece of advice It's so important to just stay you You are perfect just as you are So continue to stay strong Remember no matter what they tell you What society says is wrong
Continue reading...
64
To give life you must take life, and as our grief falls flat and hollow upon the billion-blooded sea I pass upon serious inward-breaking shoals rimmed with white-legged, white-bellied rotting creatures lengthily dead and rioting against surrounding scenes. Dear child, I only did to you what the sparrow did to you; I am old when it is fashionable to be young; I cry when it is fashionable to laugh. I hated you when it would have taken less courage to love.
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15.2k
As The Sparrow
Five A.M. I wake up gasping Crying, Shaking nightmares You I was talking to you For the first time in a while nightmares That wasn't so bad But then you told me You hated me nightmares No, no. I couldn't take that I woke up sobbing nightmares Five thirty A.M. Writing this down So maybe, I won't have more nightmares?
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Nov 3, 2014
Nov 3, 2014 at 5:35 AM UTC
Nightmare
Paperworks and all the lessons Sharpened my mind to behold more and more of that useless knowledge We would probably never use. Tests are bad enough. Marks at the corner teach us nothing but jealousy. The adults compare and judge as much as they want to And screamed and shouted cried and muttered. Exams are anything but better. You got stuck in a room Imprisoned by the tension. Suffocated by the hot headed determination to strive for the stars. Inhumanly high. This isn't hollywood movies Nothing like the literature essays 'how do we create tension' the subjects hold your fate but you did once told yourself 'I have no life' So what are we doing here? Wasting our days on something so terribly useless. Insignificant lectures when we know Accountants hated maths. Doctors hated biology. but they are who they are because of good results. They will realize no teachers like marking stupid homework. They hate the red crosses And so do we. Exams doesn't teach us how to be a good person. how to cope with beasty bullies.. how to survive on our own. It doesn't show any real talents nor your low (high) IQ It's just a pain in the **** You have to deal with before you became wrinkled, grey fuzzy and old.
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Jul 31, 2014
Jul 31, 2014 at 4:41 PM UTC
What About Exams?