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"handed" poems
left my phone unlocked on the taxi’s back seat, won't be the last time called it a few times finally, the driver picked up he had a fare immediately after mine, and was now headed way downtown, and would call later when fate returned him nearer my office and so it came to pass, very shortly thereafter, we met on the street, he rolled down  the window and with the greatest smile of pleasure, as if he had won the lottery beaming, handed me my phone I had two $20's to cover any expense he might have incurred, neatly folded in my hand   and offered it right up, right away; but the driver repeatedly pushed my hand away as I insisted, saying: *"No sir, no no, not necessary! Allah sent me a fare that took me soon back close to you, so,   no loss of time did I suffer, so your offer is kindly unnecessary!"* to which I replied, *"exactly! Allah sent you to me so I could reward you!"* and with an equally, beaming smile I continued, *"our ride and meeting today, together was pre-ordained it was* Inshallah!" ^ something he could not dispute... or my knowledge thereof and it’s proper pronouncement, nor his amazement, to disguise!   we parted ways    each believing,    each receiving, a heavenly check plus, each, credited with a mitzvah^^ on our respective trip logs, our humanly divine balance sheets, kept by the single supreme taxi dispatcher
0
Jun 20, 2018
Jun 20, 2018 at 1:33 PM UTC
inshallah my cell phone
I feel strange. Half light-hearted, half heavy-handed. You know when you get a song stuck in your head and you can't get it out? I hate that. That's sort of what this feels like. I feel better. Less panicked, more confused. But a good confused. You know that feeling of warm water running down your back when washing your hair? I love that. That's sort of what this feels like. I feel great. And nothing. This is just what I needed. A warm bath and a quick nap.
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Dec 13, 2015
Dec 13, 2015 at 2:44 PM UTC
Strange
Bare-handed, I hand the combs. The man in white smiles, bare-handed, Our cheesecloth gauntlets neat and sweet, The throats of our wrists brave lilies. He and I Have a thousand clean cells between us, Eight combs of yellow cups, And the hive itself a teacup, White with pink flowers on it, With excessive love I enameled it Thinking 'Sweetness, sweetness.' Brood cells gray as the fossils of shells Terrify me, they seem so old. What am I buying, wormy mahogany? Is there any queen at all in it? If there is, she is old, Her wings torn shawls, her long body Rubbed of its plush ---- Poor and bare and unqueenly and even shameful. I stand in a column Of winged, unmiraculous women, Honey-drudgers. I am no drudge Though for years I have eaten dust And dried plates with my dense hair. And seen my strangeness evaporate, Blue dew from dangerous skin. Will they hate me, These women who only scurry, Whose news is the open cherry, the open clover? It is almost over. I am in control. Here is my honey-machine, It will work without thinking, Opening, in spring, like an industrious ****** To scour the creaming crests As the moon, for its ivory powders, scours the sea. A third person is watching. He has nothing to do with the bee-seller or with me. Now he is gone In eight great bounds, a great scapegoat. Here is his slipper, here is another, And here the square of white linen He wore instead of a hat. He was sweet, The sweat of his efforts a rain Tugging the world to fruit. The bees found him out, Molding onto his lips like lies, Complicating his features. They thought death was worth it, but I Have a self to recover, a queen. Is she dead, is she sleeping? Where has she been, With her lion-red body, her wings of glass? Now she is flying More terrible than she ever was, red Scar in the sky, red comet Over the engine that killed her ---- The mausoleum, the wax house.
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38k
Stings
Bare-handed, I hand the combs. The man in white smiles, bare-handed, Our cheesecloth gauntlets neat and sweet, The throats of our wrists brave lilies. He and I Have a thousand clean cells between us, Eight combs of yellow cups, And the hive itself a teacup, White with pink flowers on it, With excessive love I enameled it Thinking 'Sweetness, sweetness.' Brood cells gray as the fossils of shells Terrify me, they seem so old. What am I buying, wormy mahogany? Is there any queen at all in it? If there is, she is old, Her wings torn shawls, her long body Rubbed of its plush ---- Poor and bare and unqueenly and even shameful. I stand in a column Of winged, unmiraculous women, Honey-drudgers. I am no drudge Though for years I have eaten dust And dried plates with my dense hair. And seen my strangeness evaporate, Blue dew from dangerous skin. Will they hate me, These women who only scurry, Whose news is the open cherry, the open clover? It is almost over. I am in control. Here is my honey-machine, It will work without thinking, Opening, in spring, like an industrious ****** To scour the creaming crests As the moon, for its ivory powders, scours the sea. A third person is watching. He has nothing to do with the bee-seller or with me. Now he is gone In eight great bounds, a great scapegoat. Here is his slipper, here is another, And here the square of white linen He wore instead of a hat. He was sweet, The sweat of his efforts a rain Tugging the world to fruit. The bees found him out, Molding onto his lips like lies, Complicating his features. They thought death was worth it, but I Have a self to recover, a queen. Is she dead, is she sleeping? Where has she been, With her lion-red body, her wings of glass? Now she is flying More terrible than she ever was, red Scar in the sky, red comet Over the engine that killed her ---- The mausoleum, the wax house.
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60
Children get handed things easily, and they learn that it's easier to throw away than to hold on and keep it. Adults are very different, they cherish things and would not objectify others since humans are not things. But right there, throwing you away like an object, the man who was no longer a child said; "I don't want you anymore"
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Sep 23, 2016
Sep 23, 2016 at 3:38 AM UTC
the art of possession
have you ever believed in something so blindly so genuinely that the moment you realize it isn't true, something inside you changes forever? i wanna tell you a story, see seldom do i ever go swimming in drinks deep enough to drown in but when i do i speak in tongues about things that none of my memories are allowed to talk about like that christmas at the isthmus where my girlfriend plucked a conch shell whiter than gods teeth out of the sand held it to her ear and stopped time that day she was a shade of blue the could've made the ocean sick see, she loved to play jokes when she held the sea shell to her ear she gasped, called my name and said "i want you to hear this" i said "yeah, right, everybody knows it's just the same old sea" she replied "no. not this one. this one is special. listen. theres music in this one" she handed me the shell like a promise she couldn't keep and i held it to my ear with all the potential of seeing shore after being stranded at sea for years only to hear a tired dirge of silence spill from its emptiness i guess she didn't know how desperately i wanted to hear it too because ever since something inside me snapped now sand pours out of every post card i open i hear seagulls in telephone static sometimes i have dreams where i bury my hands in every beach i've ever been on and exhume this graveyard of noise every time i try to sleep i spit up fishhooks and i guess i'm obsessed but maybe if i hold my ear to enough vacant things then i could have back the time stolen from me since it happened maybe they would get it if they knew what i wanted when i blow out birthday candles maybe they'll find me face down in a wishing well i watch eternal sunshine of the spotless mind every day pretending i can forget too because this sea sickness has followed me for years because yesterday i walked into a music shop and all the pianos broke but the only thing i can think to say is *do you know how bad a memory has to be that you fantasize about forgetting it?*
0
Dec 16, 2014
Dec 16, 2014 at 1:03 PM UTC
measure
have you ever believed in something so blindly so genuinely that the moment you realize it isn't true, something inside you changes forever? i wanna tell you a story, see seldom do i ever go swimming in drinks deep enough to drown in but when i do i speak in tongues about things that none of my memories are allowed to talk about like that christmas at the isthmus where my girlfriend plucked a conch shell whiter than gods teeth out of the sand held it to her ear and stopped time that day she was a shade of blue the could've made the ocean sick see, she loved to play jokes when she held the sea shell to her ear she gasped, called my name and said "i want you to hear this" i said "yeah, right, everybody knows it's just the same old sea" she replied "no. not this one. this one is special. listen. theres music in this one" she handed me the shell like a promise she couldn't keep and i held it to my ear with all the potential of seeing shore after being stranded at sea for years only to hear a tired dirge of silence spill from its emptiness i guess she didn't know how desperately i wanted to hear it too because ever since something inside me snapped now sand pours out of every post card i open i hear seagulls in telephone static sometimes i have dreams where i bury my hands in every beach i've ever been on and exhume this graveyard of noise every time i try to sleep i spit up fishhooks and i guess i'm obsessed but maybe if i hold my ear to enough vacant things then i could have back the time stolen from me since it happened maybe they would get it if they knew what i wanted when i blow out birthday candles maybe they'll find me face down in a wishing well i watch eternal sunshine of the spotless mind every day pretending i can forget too because this sea sickness has followed me for years because yesterday i walked into a music shop and all the pianos broke but the only thing i can think to say is *do you know how bad a memory has to be that you fantasize about forgetting it?*
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84
It's a **** shame.. These girls are so different yet they are the same.. A figment of imagination .. To draw a line in the divine pigment and foundation.. 2 Queens in the same race.. In the same race.. Can't get along because of the tone on their face... Whatever the case I wish you all could get first place.. Don't let the color of your skin have you unfit within... I wish I could undraw that a line with the pen.. Of self hate that they handed us.. We didn't wanna hate eachother they demanded us... These skin tones... They tore us apart from the field to the kitchen.. Enough of the ******** & ******* QUEENS PRAISE QUEENS!!!!! And that final.. Instead of making enemies.. Make yourself someone's idol... Don't let this world segregate a segregated being.. I'm dedicating this to you.. Every dark skinned & light skinned Queen... ONE LOVE...
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Jan 5, 2015
Jan 5, 2015 at 5:00 PM UTC
One Love
i have slept restlessly for  nights now, reliving the events that have conjured within the past 72 hours. i think to myself, how would anyone want to bring another into this world knowing the pain they will endure? yes. you will feel pain, indescribable, chest filling, body aching pain from your head to your toes. i wont try to paint a perfect picture of this world and let you down. hating me every moment for the things i never said. you will be beaten down by others, torn away from the connection you thought you had. you will sit in a coffee shop alone, biting your lip with anxiety, and he will call you in the dead of night pleading for you to keep him company once more. you will miss the way you looked at the world, with innocence and purity, reliving every moment of suffering and rewriting its pages. you will invest your heart in people, things that will only let you down. but sweet child this suffering that you feel will be soon over. it is how you overcome these situations of awkward confrontation and scandalous betrayal. because one day a bee will buzz past you and you will jump up and down like a child again, tugging on the end of your own dress, smiling. you will laugh once again because the perpetual love you feel from those who surround you with positive energy will fill the gaping hole of disappointment that the world has so willingly handed you. like i said, i will not paint a perfect picture for you, because every artist has their flaws, but they cover them oh so well. and you should never have to carry that kind of burden. love always, me
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Nov 29, 2016
Nov 29, 2016 at 8:07 PM UTC
to my future daughter
i have slept restlessly for  nights now, reliving the events that have conjured within the past 72 hours. i think to myself, how would anyone want to bring another into this world knowing the pain they will endure? yes. you will feel pain, indescribable, chest filling, body aching pain from your head to your toes. i wont try to paint a perfect picture of this world and let you down. hating me every moment for the things i never said. you will be beaten down by others, torn away from the connection you thought you had. you will sit in a coffee shop alone, biting your lip with anxiety, and he will call you in the dead of night pleading for you to keep him company once more. you will miss the way you looked at the world, with innocence and purity, reliving every moment of suffering and rewriting its pages. you will invest your heart in people, things that will only let you down. but sweet child this suffering that you feel will be soon over. it is how you overcome these situations of awkward confrontation and scandalous betrayal. because one day a bee will buzz past you and you will jump up and down like a child again, tugging on the end of your own dress, smiling. you will laugh once again because the perpetual love you feel from those who surround you with positive energy will fill the gaping hole of disappointment that the world has so willingly handed you. like i said, i will not paint a perfect picture for you, because every artist has their flaws, but they cover them oh so well. and you should never have to carry that kind of burden. love always, me
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3
I met a friend today His name was Death He smiled big with pure white teeth And minty fresh breath I asked him what he did for a living Staring blankly at me, batting his eyelashes He did the opposite of giving What did that mean? But the closer I got to Death The better I understood his scheme In his sharp black suit he won me over I felt an irresistible draw Like to a diamond in the rough, or a four leaf clover He convinced me of the beauty in the night That when the moon was hidden from view There was nothing better than the lack of light He led me from my lust for life Sang to me in my sleep Whispered sweet nothings and handed me the knife I tried to pull away from my newly found friend But his choke hold was so tight On him I started to depend The world could see me deteriorate into nothing He held me harder and closer With shortness of breath I stood huffing and puffing Enclosed in the lackluster of our friendship I became numb The emotions drifted with my vitality I tried to retrieve them but could only attain 1/5th of my former sum The more time you spend with a person The more you become like them I suppose I couldn't see the situation worsen Collar around my neck he leashed me like a dog I cared so deeply for him My haze filled mind ignored the dense fog I came to terms with my life long trap Death circled like a satellite around my position No matter where I went he found my place on the map Eventually I succame to this fate Despite his control Death, I could not hate I loved him too dearly to notice the signs I couldn't think clearly His presence was odious and it wasn't benign
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Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 11:25 PM UTC
Death
I met a friend today His name was Death He smiled big with pure white teeth And minty fresh breath I asked him what he did for a living Staring blankly at me, batting his eyelashes He did the opposite of giving What did that mean? But the closer I got to Death The better I understood his scheme In his sharp black suit he won me over I felt an irresistible draw Like to a diamond in the rough, or a four leaf clover He convinced me of the beauty in the night That when the moon was hidden from view There was nothing better than the lack of light He led me from my lust for life Sang to me in my sleep Whispered sweet nothings and handed me the knife I tried to pull away from my newly found friend But his choke hold was so tight On him I started to depend The world could see me deteriorate into nothing He held me harder and closer With shortness of breath I stood huffing and puffing Enclosed in the lackluster of our friendship I became numb The emotions drifted with my vitality I tried to retrieve them but could only attain 1/5th of my former sum The more time you spend with a person The more you become like them I suppose I couldn't see the situation worsen Collar around my neck he leashed me like a dog I cared so deeply for him My haze filled mind ignored the dense fog I came to terms with my life long trap Death circled like a satellite around my position No matter where I went he found my place on the map Eventually I succame to this fate Despite his control Death, I could not hate I loved him too dearly to notice the signs I couldn't think clearly His presence was odious and it wasn't benign
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43
You sat on the other end of the table Glistening, shining, and taunting me Rosy cheeks with spurts of Yellow and Green Silently teasing A juicy, little Apple. Hopefully no one would see me, no one would pay any attention As I grabbed the treat and the knife And began to dangerously peel. I knew I was doing it wrong My hands shaking while my cheeks began to flush Embarrassed by my ignorant inadequacy. Are you left-handed? she asked from my left. Humiliation filled the corners of my eyes, wet and distraught. No, I mumbled. My cheeks reflecting Mose's Red Sea. I was beginning to drown. Your thumb needs to move, You make me nervous, and she sounded nervous indeed. Put it down here. Help yourself control it. Guide it. Everyone was staring now, the whole table awed My ignorance showing, like a medallion at my chest My shameful Apple as pathetic proof. You're doing it wrong. Non così. Basta, faccio io. Let me do it. You're about to graduate, and you can't peel an apple. I began choking, drowning in tears of Humiliation. No, let her do it the small Voice on my left said. She is finding her way. Let me watch her. I finished peeling the Apple Suffocating my tears as I ate. You remind me of Daisy, she said soon after From The Great Gatsby. I choked and laughed, more ashamed than ever. I'm not sure that is a compliment. I could barely muster a mumble. She couldn't do anything by herself. She looked at me, gentle and forgiving. I think it is, she replied Wistful and Wise. Daisy was vital to the story, you know. And I believe that given the chance, she could have done anything that she wanted On her own.
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May 5, 2014
May 5, 2014 at 6:27 PM UTC
growing up Daisy
You sat on the other end of the table Glistening, shining, and taunting me Rosy cheeks with spurts of Yellow and Green Silently teasing A juicy, little Apple. Hopefully no one would see me, no one would pay any attention As I grabbed the treat and the knife And began to dangerously peel. I knew I was doing it wrong My hands shaking while my cheeks began to flush Embarrassed by my ignorant inadequacy. Are you left-handed? she asked from my left. Humiliation filled the corners of my eyes, wet and distraught. No, I mumbled. My cheeks reflecting Mose's Red Sea. I was beginning to drown. Your thumb needs to move, You make me nervous, and she sounded nervous indeed. Put it down here. Help yourself control it. Guide it. Everyone was staring now, the whole table awed My ignorance showing, like a medallion at my chest My shameful Apple as pathetic proof. You're doing it wrong. Non così. Basta, faccio io. Let me do it. You're about to graduate, and you can't peel an apple. I began choking, drowning in tears of Humiliation. No, let her do it the small Voice on my left said. She is finding her way. Let me watch her. I finished peeling the Apple Suffocating my tears as I ate. You remind me of Daisy, she said soon after From The Great Gatsby. I choked and laughed, more ashamed than ever. I'm not sure that is a compliment. I could barely muster a mumble. She couldn't do anything by herself. She looked at me, gentle and forgiving. I think it is, she replied Wistful and Wise. Daisy was vital to the story, you know. And I believe that given the chance, she could have done anything that she wanted On her own.
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42
Spring upon the rose and live on the flow— delve into the fragrance that goes full tilt on petals that never drift with the wind. Let it be—without form, without a visual show. Let’s not forget the truth: even in pitch-dark invisible moments, the Moon puts up a show. Believe it or not—around that sweet spot, the artistic paragon, Paradise, may be the next stop. The butterfly paradise slips out to fly, wafting into the enduring scent of a paint so bold. Lo—on its picturesque wings it holds every eye; where it reaches, no one knows. It’s on the other side of the pool— only Queen Fathima knows that sweet spot! Any pause is deadly, heavy-handed on that route. Death is no more; it’s unknown now. And time—ripe for beauteous sight—is on for good! If only one can hold their gaze, walking the secret alleyways of God! Oh, they flower in the fire, dip into the sea in a single drop of water, and pan out to another world within this world. This time, Moses resists not— his eyes peep beyond the burnt Mount Sinai, gazing through burnt kohl, across the shaded pollens of the Ultimate Burning Beauty! When it’s live in the true terra incognita, it could be beyond the paradise rainbow— the one show the true seekers sought the most. Before long, all the rest may fade into the kohl. Godsent, the most beautiful feminine paragon—Fathima— lifts the black screen off at once, casting her gaze from every never-blurred, myriad fractal pixel. All in all, even the never-known pi digits in toto soak into the one true description of reality's show! Be en route— it’s only the chosen eyes’ wonder-show, where the handsome swans of Paradise stand on their toes.
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Mar 21, 2019
Mar 21, 2019 at 11:17 AM UTC
The Butterfly Paradise On The Fly
Spring upon the rose and live on the flow— delve into the fragrance that goes full tilt on petals that never drift with the wind. Let it be—without form, without a visual show. Let’s not forget the truth: even in pitch-dark invisible moments, the Moon puts up a show. Believe it or not—around that sweet spot, the artistic paragon, Paradise, may be the next stop. The butterfly paradise slips out to fly, wafting into the enduring scent of a paint so bold. Lo—on its picturesque wings it holds every eye; where it reaches, no one knows. It’s on the other side of the pool— only Queen Fathima knows that sweet spot! Any pause is deadly, heavy-handed on that route. Death is no more; it’s unknown now. And time—ripe for beauteous sight—is on for good! If only one can hold their gaze, walking the secret alleyways of God! Oh, they flower in the fire, dip into the sea in a single drop of water, and pan out to another world within this world. This time, Moses resists not— his eyes peep beyond the burnt Mount Sinai, gazing through burnt kohl, across the shaded pollens of the Ultimate Burning Beauty! When it’s live in the true terra incognita, it could be beyond the paradise rainbow— the one show the true seekers sought the most. Before long, all the rest may fade into the kohl. Godsent, the most beautiful feminine paragon—Fathima— lifts the black screen off at once, casting her gaze from every never-blurred, myriad fractal pixel. All in all, even the never-known pi digits in toto soak into the one true description of reality's show! Be en route— it’s only the chosen eyes’ wonder-show, where the handsome swans of Paradise stand on their toes.
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41
I wonder if you’d want to know I named all of my demons after you and they haunt me in my sleep when I was 14 I fell asleep in April and dreamed of bones and I’m not sure I’ve really ever woken up since when I lost 5 pounds I never saw a difference when I lost 10 my mother said I was looking good when I lost 20 she told me to stop and handed me food and I became anemic when I lost 25 I stopped drinking anything because I felt water had calories when I lost 30 my mother held me on her lap and held my bones together for me when I lost 35 I started fainting every morning and the doctors could no longer easily find my blood pressure when I lost 40 people started to stare and food made me cry when I lost 45 it hurt to walk and to lay down it hurt to eat it hurt to breathe and I started throwing up my empty stomach the mind plays tricks on those that decide nourishment is not needed Eat.
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Apr 11, 2014
Apr 11, 2014 at 10:07 AM UTC
Anorexic Dream
The landlord rented his space. The landlord became suspicious. He received complaints from other tenants, Within a couple of weeks about loud music And laughter coming from her room. Banned from having friends in their home, People would arrive in a van nightly during the summer. The details of which emerged in the trial of insurance businessman, Who was accused of helping her, Without their knowledge. She accused the abuse after a plea. His mercy, Her punishment. ‘The past is still very much a reality’ she whimpered. Forced to watch for five months, The wolf spoke as she faced the hearing Without a translator. They are forbidden to speak. For her first 23 years, she was tortured. Anti-social behaviour is having more than two people in his head, Playing music so loud, That it can be heard, Outside of him. The only person to feel the same resigned. The landlord asked the hound to verify the affair. He handed two leather-bound volumes containing a map of the marks. It was on that day, The landlord took the decision to leave seriously. Once known, He made the claim and gave no hint as to the tenant’s identity. Up for a chance to win, We wish you safe travels.
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Feb 24, 2013
Feb 24, 2013 at 6:27 AM UTC
8. Render Loyalty
Lady, your room is lousy with flowers. When you kick me out, that's what I'll remember, Me, sitting here bored as a loepard In your jungle of wine-bottle lamps, Velvet pillows the color of blood pudding And the white china flying fish from Italy. I forget you, hearing the cut flowers Sipping their liquids from assorted pots, Pitchers and Coronation goblets Like Monday drunkards. The milky berries Bow down, a local constellation, Toward their admirers in the tabletop: Mobs of eyeballs looking up. Are those petals of leaves you've paried with them --- Those green-striped ovals of silver tissue? The red geraniums I know. Friends, friends. They stink of armpits And the invovled maladies of autumn, Musky as a lovebed the morning after. My nostrils prickle with nostalgia. Henna hags:cloth of your cloth. They tow old water thick as fog. The roses in the Toby jug Gave up the ghost last night. High time. Their yellow corsets were ready to split. You snored, and I heard the petals unlatch, Tapping and ticking like nervous fingers. You should have junked them before they died. Daybreak discovered the bureau lid Littered with Chinese hands. Now I'm stared at By chrysanthemums the size Of Holofernes' head, dipped in the same Magenta as this fubsy sofa. In the mirror their doubles back them up. Listen: your tenant mice Are rattling the ******* packets. Fine flour Muffles their bird feet: they whistle for joy. And you doze on, nose to the wall. This mizzle fits me like a sad jacket. How did we make it up to your attic? You handed me gin in a glass bud vase. We slept like stones. Lady, what am I doing With a lung full of dust and a tongue of wood, Knee-deep in the cold swamped by flowers?
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14.7k
Leaving Early
Lady, your room is lousy with flowers. When you kick me out, that's what I'll remember, Me, sitting here bored as a loepard In your jungle of wine-bottle lamps, Velvet pillows the color of blood pudding And the white china flying fish from Italy. I forget you, hearing the cut flowers Sipping their liquids from assorted pots, Pitchers and Coronation goblets Like Monday drunkards. The milky berries Bow down, a local constellation, Toward their admirers in the tabletop: Mobs of eyeballs looking up. Are those petals of leaves you've paried with them --- Those green-striped ovals of silver tissue? The red geraniums I know. Friends, friends. They stink of armpits And the invovled maladies of autumn, Musky as a lovebed the morning after. My nostrils prickle with nostalgia. Henna hags:cloth of your cloth. They tow old water thick as fog. The roses in the Toby jug Gave up the ghost last night. High time. Their yellow corsets were ready to split. You snored, and I heard the petals unlatch, Tapping and ticking like nervous fingers. You should have junked them before they died. Daybreak discovered the bureau lid Littered with Chinese hands. Now I'm stared at By chrysanthemums the size Of Holofernes' head, dipped in the same Magenta as this fubsy sofa. In the mirror their doubles back them up. Listen: your tenant mice Are rattling the ******* packets. Fine flour Muffles their bird feet: they whistle for joy. And you doze on, nose to the wall. This mizzle fits me like a sad jacket. How did we make it up to your attic? You handed me gin in a glass bud vase. We slept like stones. Lady, what am I doing With a lung full of dust and a tongue of wood, Knee-deep in the cold swamped by flowers?
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44
I've loved many boys With different colored eyes But the way I remember them is By the shape of their hands The way their thumbs curved Or how their palms felt against my own The weight of them on my thighs Or how they ran through my hair The times they zipped up my dress And settled on my shoulders The moments when they grazed my own As they handed me my keys The motion of them as they spoke And the motionless of them when they were silent The smoothness of them in the beginning And the calluses after time had passed Sometimes, I forget the faces of these boys Or the way their voice sounded over the phone But I'll never forget the way it felt With their hands intertwined in my own
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Jun 23, 2018
Jun 23, 2018 at 11:45 PM UTC
Hands
See, you hear this word and shiver While some of us get problems of the liver yup! Exams are what I'm talking about The reason pupils start howling about Oh exams! What do we do with you As it approaches, students be like A reaction no one ever seen like In our dreams like a monster sneaks up Within our soul like Death creaps up Oh exams! What do we do with you That one night before exam burden Reminds me of the war of verdun Only if had books borrowed or lend All night were the eyes to suspend Oh exams! What do we do with you That, to be murdered day arrived Of peaceful sleep were we deprived When the exam hall were we to enter Shot a bullet shrapnel in the center Dead were we when we turned the paper Those questions turned us into vapor Students like us had two or three attempted Handed over those 2 sheets and left all exempted Oh exams! What do we do with you You're welcome, now to hell with you
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Sep 17, 2017
Sep 17, 2017 at 3:49 AM UTC
'Exams'
They call it BPD A illness that shapes me, Its the “I don’t fit in” disorder, The “Your the one who’s out of order.” Come to terms I now admit, How hard I felt each near hit. Always one with the conflict, feelings of A counterfeit. There turns A time of no cease, absence of light is unleashed, out of the blue from the inside, this empty form and crowded mind. A Diagnosis is in .. The cerebrums burnt, like third degree skin, Its now over sensitive to everything. The cause of the burns, Is internal fires, that incinerated mental wires. Did I change who I am, for A world i saw to be A sham, attempting to form A personality, Ill try them on to see what fits me. Not afraid to be on my own yet again, not all alone. To see the great in everyone until reminded that Im wrong. If everything is all black and white, Right or wrong, where do I look too belong, My solitary single handed fight, To search for release of this plight.
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May 26, 2019
May 26, 2019 at 4:29 PM UTC
Borderline Personality Disorder
I'd like to tell you a story It begins in 1492 When dear old Christopher Columbus Sailed the ocean blue He landed on what he thought To be the country of India He stumbled upon a group of people Who appeared to be indigenous Because these native people Happened to be where he thought he was He called them all "Indians" && somehow that name stuck They welcomed his group with open arms Even offered them their feast Unaware that deep inside They were but wolves, dressed as sheep Columbus && his crew Soon ravaged the land They took what they saw Then they took full command Of the people they found On the land where they landed They felt they should rule So they stepped in, heavy handed They murdered the people Who had taken them in Set fire to their villages While the victims watched with their kin Flash forward to the future It's now 2016 It's been over 500 years Since the overtaking by the regime Future settlers decided To let the survivors live on They designated them small areas Of what had not yet been robbed These Native Americans, Generally keep to themselves They get by living off their land But now they need your help The Sioux of Standing Rock Are being horribly mistreated The state of North Dakota Is poisoning them without reason A pipeline has been built That runs through this Native territory When Bismarck residents didn't want it It was rerouted, how discriminatory People from all over the country Are seeming to agree They are making the commute To protest peacefully In defense of an oppressed people Who only want to live But the government is stepping in Even blowing off some limbs "Let them die, they're not like us" the message the administration is sending It seems that after all this time The battle is never-ending What exactly does it take For people to see eye-to-eye? In the end we're all just human   We kiss, we laugh, we cry So if you have a heart at all If you know that this is wrong Please join the Sioux in their mission By coming together, we can be strong
0
Dec 2, 2016
Dec 2, 2016 at 11:30 PM UTC
History's Repeating
I'd like to tell you a story It begins in 1492 When dear old Christopher Columbus Sailed the ocean blue He landed on what he thought To be the country of India He stumbled upon a group of people Who appeared to be indigenous Because these native people Happened to be where he thought he was He called them all "Indians" && somehow that name stuck They welcomed his group with open arms Even offered them their feast Unaware that deep inside They were but wolves, dressed as sheep Columbus && his crew Soon ravaged the land They took what they saw Then they took full command Of the people they found On the land where they landed They felt they should rule So they stepped in, heavy handed They murdered the people Who had taken them in Set fire to their villages While the victims watched with their kin Flash forward to the future It's now 2016 It's been over 500 years Since the overtaking by the regime Future settlers decided To let the survivors live on They designated them small areas Of what had not yet been robbed These Native Americans, Generally keep to themselves They get by living off their land But now they need your help The Sioux of Standing Rock Are being horribly mistreated The state of North Dakota Is poisoning them without reason A pipeline has been built That runs through this Native territory When Bismarck residents didn't want it It was rerouted, how discriminatory People from all over the country Are seeming to agree They are making the commute To protest peacefully In defense of an oppressed people Who only want to live But the government is stepping in Even blowing off some limbs "Let them die, they're not like us" the message the administration is sending It seems that after all this time The battle is never-ending What exactly does it take For people to see eye-to-eye? In the end we're all just human   We kiss, we laugh, we cry So if you have a heart at all If you know that this is wrong Please join the Sioux in their mission By coming together, we can be strong
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68
The King of Victory It was a Sunday not quite like any other. The time was near that Jesus would be handed over to the rulers of this world and be subject to them so that he might save many. On their way into the city of Jerusalem, Jesus sends two of his disciples ahead to bring him a donkey to ride in on and to say that the master has need of it. Jesus rides into the city on the back of a donkey and all around him celebrate and rejoice singing praise and giving glory. They lay their cloaks and palm branches which represent victory on the road ahead of Jesus for him to walk on. It truly is a joyous day in the city of David. No one there seems to have any idea that in one short week this parade of celebration would be no longer and many of these very same people would be parading him through these very same streets condemning him and calling for his death. Jesus your life came full circle. Before you came into this world you entered Bethlehem outside of Jerusalem riding on the back of a donkey in your mother’s womb. A week before your death you would humble yourself once more and come ride into Jerusalem on the back of a donkey. A humble beast of burden, an animal that carries a heavy load and serves. You bore the weight of the cross and the weight of all of our sins and you served us faithfully even when we were not faithful to you. We are so much like the crowds that gathered on Palm Sunday; rejoicing, singing your praise and giving you glory one moment and the next moment we are also the ones who are calling for your death, mocking you and jeering. Still, you look upon us with endless love and mercy. You forgive us, you redeem us, and you call us quietly to return to you once again. You would suffer and die so that on the third day, we might finally see that no power on earth or hell or anything above can separate us from your love, and showing us once and for all you are the King of Victory! AMEN!
0
Apr 2, 2015
Apr 2, 2015 at 9:07 AM UTC
The King of Victory Meditation
The King of Victory It was a Sunday not quite like any other. The time was near that Jesus would be handed over to the rulers of this world and be subject to them so that he might save many. On their way into the city of Jerusalem, Jesus sends two of his disciples ahead to bring him a donkey to ride in on and to say that the master has need of it. Jesus rides into the city on the back of a donkey and all around him celebrate and rejoice singing praise and giving glory. They lay their cloaks and palm branches which represent victory on the road ahead of Jesus for him to walk on. It truly is a joyous day in the city of David. No one there seems to have any idea that in one short week this parade of celebration would be no longer and many of these very same people would be parading him through these very same streets condemning him and calling for his death. Jesus your life came full circle. Before you came into this world you entered Bethlehem outside of Jerusalem riding on the back of a donkey in your mother’s womb. A week before your death you would humble yourself once more and come ride into Jerusalem on the back of a donkey. A humble beast of burden, an animal that carries a heavy load and serves. You bore the weight of the cross and the weight of all of our sins and you served us faithfully even when we were not faithful to you. We are so much like the crowds that gathered on Palm Sunday; rejoicing, singing your praise and giving you glory one moment and the next moment we are also the ones who are calling for your death, mocking you and jeering. Still, you look upon us with endless love and mercy. You forgive us, you redeem us, and you call us quietly to return to you once again. You would suffer and die so that on the third day, we might finally see that no power on earth or hell or anything above can separate us from your love, and showing us once and for all you are the King of Victory! AMEN!
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3
The times here, mind clear removed fear, mind fully-aware they can’t calculate my circumference they try-angle-hate to encompass i’m too persistent consistently consistent my philosophy brilliant they’re mindfully malignant plots thicken and spots pigment perfect gentlemen, acting indecent handed them knowledge, didn't keep it then peep game, telling secrets I’m sure they’re getting seasick its been written, still going off the top the deep-end, the stuck on the plot
0
Dec 5, 2014
Dec 5, 2014 at 10:19 PM UTC
Rap verses freestyle
Welcome back to your hometown Nothing much has changed since you we're last around Time never seemed to make its rounds To visit the streets of your hometown You've been away from this place for years Never skipped a beat nor shed a lick of tears So why do you find yourself back here Thought that when you left, you made it clear You swore you would never come back again A promise you made way back then You had your why's you knew your when's Your old hometown was no way to live As you step back onto Main street You ain't felt this sidewalk since the 70's You find yourself not surprised to see The reason then you had to leave On the front porch of your old house You reach for the door before you chicken out That's when it is you figure out Why in the first place you left your hometown You turn your back and turn away To confront your demons another day Where you're less scared or more brave In what it is you have to say So here it is another round Of one handed goodbyes to your hometown If you ever had your well deserved doubts You're no longer welcome in your hometown
0
Sep 5, 2014
Sep 5, 2014 at 7:39 AM UTC
Your Hometown
There's nothing quite like having your memory erased the best thing that'll ever happen the best thing you'll ever taste are the drugs sliding down your throat to splash in the stomach acid pumping chemicals through your veins The synapses in my brain are full of dopamine and my serotonin levels are off the charts On the outside I stand tall like a steel soldier but on the inside I'm crumpled up with a paper heart How do I tell my mom I'm on, walk in while she makes her art, day before her birthday What words would I even spit how could I say I just downed a bottle of codine, she'd disown me So I stumble up stairs to my old bed, pictures of my graduation burn my head, but it's imagination the room swirls but I'm station...ary Started off with a bet, kids dared me When your fifteen you don't see the bad side, the glazed eyes rolled back drifting, all you feel is the lifting and the bass pumping, through your chest blasting off real life stress, you can't tell you're a mess Rolling, feeling like the best But now I can't sleep unless I'm on and then I don't dream. It's time to start taking steps instead of X, I'll do reps at the gym I'm done giving in, I done living in fog, done being gone. Yesterday me and Tony were on the go driving slow, on the hunt for blow picked up, lined up, he handed me the dollar bill rolled up and I could feel my brain screaming, yes, my veins aching, yes, my hands reaching for the dollar but then... I said no.
0
Nov 7, 2012
Nov 7, 2012 at 1:19 AM UTC
Memory Loss
The first suicide hit like a bullet BANG One of us dead, and at his own hand The tension in the hallways filed into the ears of all those who walked through its thick silence It was a struggle to move through the heavy weight of a quiet hallway People cried, whether they knew him or not Teachers made promises, “It’s worth it,” he said “I swear to you, it’s worth it.” A moment of silence for the boy who is no longer living, Whose hidden pain was known by none Whose family will never be the same Whose future which once was mystery, is nothing but imaginary The second suicide hit like a rock THUNK The hallways rang with growing confusion, At every turn, each whisper faded into the next in a mirage of sadness But mostly confusion Letters were handed out, but there was no time for more tears and speeches They had postponed the moment of silence for the girl who is no longer living, Whose hidden pain was known by none Whose family will never be the same Whose future which once was mystery, is nothing but imaginary The third suicide did not hit SWOOSH It was not silent anymore There was laughing and talking, as the excitement of yesterday’s football victory buzzed throughout noisy hallways The letters were passed out late and no one read them Teachers continued with their lesson plans Students continued with their joke making and picture taking Because people don’t have to keep caring after strike three There was no moment of silence for the boy who is no longer living Whose hidden pain was known by none Whose family will never be the same Whose future which once was mystery, is nothing but imaginary This is our dystopia
0
May 8, 2014
May 8, 2014 at 12:40 AM UTC
This is Our Dystopia
The first suicide hit like a bullet BANG One of us dead, and at his own hand The tension in the hallways filed into the ears of all those who walked through its thick silence It was a struggle to move through the heavy weight of a quiet hallway People cried, whether they knew him or not Teachers made promises, “It’s worth it,” he said “I swear to you, it’s worth it.” A moment of silence for the boy who is no longer living, Whose hidden pain was known by none Whose family will never be the same Whose future which once was mystery, is nothing but imaginary The second suicide hit like a rock THUNK The hallways rang with growing confusion, At every turn, each whisper faded into the next in a mirage of sadness But mostly confusion Letters were handed out, but there was no time for more tears and speeches They had postponed the moment of silence for the girl who is no longer living, Whose hidden pain was known by none Whose family will never be the same Whose future which once was mystery, is nothing but imaginary The third suicide did not hit SWOOSH It was not silent anymore There was laughing and talking, as the excitement of yesterday’s football victory buzzed throughout noisy hallways The letters were passed out late and no one read them Teachers continued with their lesson plans Students continued with their joke making and picture taking Because people don’t have to keep caring after strike three There was no moment of silence for the boy who is no longer living Whose hidden pain was known by none Whose family will never be the same Whose future which once was mystery, is nothing but imaginary This is our dystopia
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38
my subject, mrs. ((brown?)) for this speech is going to be: obesity. ish. you see I remember the article you handed out to us, loos-leafed, fresh-pressed, a dry white piece that told, in simplest terms, the most inarguable & bland facts about !healthy eating & !weight loss! but mrs ((whatever)), I want to tell n and the entire ******* crisp class, that obesity is a load of steaming **** from someone who’s really fucki ng sick (you know how much better it stinks then) that obesity was made to be glorified, I don’t tell you this— I ****** jiggle it to you, grab my santa clause puch and shove it at you-- tick tock we wait for the clock to tell us what s to come, except it makes us guess --see this: a mid-age woman, mother, fat & previously fat, goes in for stabbing pain in the chest, or chronic diarrhea, seeing stars & no energy left. ((this happens)) the doctor says, well let’s weigh you n see if you’ve lost the weight I told you to lose before remember Sharol now Sharol..,,,, sweety….. you weigh 55.62 lbs over the state-set “healthy limit”k, so we’re just gonna give u these diet pills & I promise they work,. all nach-yer-awl u see, none of that waterweight ******** [! excuse my language] and in about 3 months you’ll lose half that overweight, and I promise the starsll go away and you’ll feel right tip top okay now that’ll be $60 & come bac k in a month to tell me how much you’ve lost okay haha but that’s alrightright? she was unhealthy & doctors make you healthy only her brain cancer maybe, or like, colon cancer or literally anything other obesity kills her in about 3 months bc the **** doctor would only pretend that she cared what was wrong with Sharol, sweety…,,, im sharol and so are you and so is your uncle & so is your mother, probably because most of us are “obese” & the only cure for obesity is the cure for the term “obesity” you see
0
May 3, 2016
May 3, 2016 at 3:50 PM UTC
Obesity
my subject, mrs. ((brown?)) for this speech is going to be: obesity. ish. you see I remember the article you handed out to us, loos-leafed, fresh-pressed, a dry white piece that told, in simplest terms, the most inarguable & bland facts about !healthy eating & !weight loss! but mrs ((whatever)), I want to tell n and the entire ******* crisp class, that obesity is a load of steaming **** from someone who’s really fucki ng sick (you know how much better it stinks then) that obesity was made to be glorified, I don’t tell you this— I ****** jiggle it to you, grab my santa clause puch and shove it at you-- tick tock we wait for the clock to tell us what s to come, except it makes us guess --see this: a mid-age woman, mother, fat & previously fat, goes in for stabbing pain in the chest, or chronic diarrhea, seeing stars & no energy left. ((this happens)) the doctor says, well let’s weigh you n see if you’ve lost the weight I told you to lose before remember Sharol now Sharol..,,,, sweety….. you weigh 55.62 lbs over the state-set “healthy limit”k, so we’re just gonna give u these diet pills & I promise they work,. all nach-yer-awl u see, none of that waterweight ******** [! excuse my language] and in about 3 months you’ll lose half that overweight, and I promise the starsll go away and you’ll feel right tip top okay now that’ll be $60 & come bac k in a month to tell me how much you’ve lost okay haha but that’s alrightright? she was unhealthy & doctors make you healthy only her brain cancer maybe, or like, colon cancer or literally anything other obesity kills her in about 3 months bc the **** doctor would only pretend that she cared what was wrong with Sharol, sweety…,,, im sharol and so are you and so is your uncle & so is your mother, probably because most of us are “obese” & the only cure for obesity is the cure for the term “obesity” you see
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74
it was me who destroyed carthage of the ancient worlds in 1300bc. the way i destroyed carthage was this. my mother was a persian queen and carthage wanted persia destroyed. my mother did not want her husband killed so she sent me, her eldest child, to the war. i told them that if they looked into my right eye they would think it was very beautiful but if they then looked into my left eye, which was my most beautiful eye, for i was left-handed, even as most creative people are even back then, they would notice it was even more beautiful. i then said if i wanted to be a little kind to them they would want to be very very kind to me. they liked me and tried to show me their great kindness but the truth was that they had been so unkind to their children with bad magics involving rings that they died instantly. that is how i destroyed carthage.
0
Jan 3, 2020
Jan 3, 2020 at 11:57 AM UTC
the destruction of carthage