Got my background *****
Never my fault, I've tried
Don't even blame my fate
Everyone littered constantly
Put my life under many sweats

Had to wake up and run
Never turning back, just trying
When hardwork pays off
To get that taste in every level
Cramps transformed to rewards

It's a risk to root down deep
Staying in that mode unshakeable
That's how I'm growing through
With all these dirts beneath me
Strengthen my stem and blossom
On the surface like a lotus

I don't need to breathe
I just need to sleep
I need you to stop getting so close to me
I'm a ticking time bomb
Ready to blow
One more second
And my world will explode

I'm Dreaming of death
No regrets
**** all these demons that are filling my head
They tempt me with rest
That final escape
And I'm waiting for the moment that
I finally cave

Lost in a moment
And I'm feeling alright
Maybe even thinking
I don't hate this life
But that light came so fast
And Now it's all passed
My darkness returns
Leaving nothing in its path

I'm Dreaming of death
No regrets
**** all these demons that are filling my head
They tempt me will rest
A final escape
And I'm waiting for the minute that
I finally cave

Ugh
God save my soul
I need a way out
I've been digging my grave
And This dirts coats my mouth
But I know you cant hear me
No I don't believe
Cause I control my own destiny

But I can't do it on my own

I'm Dreaming of death
No regrets
**** all these demons that are filling my head
They tempt me will rest
A final escape
And I'm waiting for the second that
I finally cave

Please, I know you can do it
No
Baby don't give in
I swear it'll change
Just try to make it
One more day

i hope every door that closes on you another one opens,
another opportunity shows,
another chance,
something to hold on,
something better that won't ever close.
i hope the white walls and ceilings you see,
are as clean as your intentions,
those dirts are just imperfections,
that makes up you
you deserve everything you gave away,
you deserve a love that shines everyday, and shows rainbows after the rain.
you deserve the best.
you don't have to be like them,
you don't have to walk, talk or dress like them,
be your own person,
be the one who differs from everyone, that wants to be like any other person.
most girls, are smart and strong and beautiful,
so are you,
the only thing that makes you ugly is the fact that you don't want to embrace you difference.
you are beautiful,
maybe not in the looks but what's important is in the soul.

Foe of several eras, why do ye love?
Dirt is ruinous to be here, near sky.
Get out, get out, O temptress, you’re no Dove.
You’re a scourge to the eye.

Is this useless?
Am I useless?
Are doubts the mark of wisdom?
As the wise sit and wait.
The greatest advice I heard,
For my family to lift my chin
For my shoulders to lift our backs,

Is that the ground has nothing for eyes.
With one last look around I noticed why,
This debris is interesting, but deprived.
Stories. From what is left behind.
The beginnings of my deductive empathy
Sound like the pauses in my discrepancy
And sure, these countless questions can lead to great things
But when should I release my reticence for my wings?
Another twinge in rhetoric,
A singe in my time's tick

I must look up from the path to see my own,
There is no use in musing at buried bone.
A miser of different dirts will become rich among rubble.
Not believing that anything is worth its trouble,
Is a mark of death, not wisdom.
I am sorry for not seeing this prison.

People are like dirt. They can either nourish you and help you grow as a person or they can stunt your growth and make you wilt and die

This poem is ridiculous
And you’re so predictable
Together you are
Ridiculously predictable

And you spin your hair
On your skinny little finger
I stop and stare
Let my scent linger

Eyes are a deep sea green
Attitude of a beauty queen
This feels right
It’s a perfect night

But you’re gay
Why are you gay?
You tell me you like men
Kissed a boy in your closet when you were ten
You liked playing with Barbies- but only Ken
I love everything about you
And I am not about to
Leave you alone

With your news paper
You count me out
Keep reading about that ***** shaper
Oh, you make me want to shout

What can I say?
You’re gay
You tell me you like men
Kissed a boy in your closet when you were ten
You liked playing with Barbies- but mostly Ken

Tight jeans and collared shirts
Stick up your nose at the dirts
Got your cappuccino and walk around
Crush your cigarette butts into the ground

Get your books for class
Tap your boyfriend’s ***
God, you’re so predictable

Not one for sunshine, she preferred the shade. Understandable. Arizona can be a real ***** if you know what I mean. Even the cactuses are dried stiff and developed sun-callouses. She was tired of drinking sand in her water, sand in her air, lungs grity like dentist tooth paste. She was also blind, never saw the yellow of the sun but knew of the light, its brightness its harsh ways. She was aware of the prickly green cactuses, the rattle snakes with their innards cooking during lunch time. This woman wanted to live with trees now. Desert had been a past time to dream about during her youth, she heard of the bitter dirts and dry airs and miles of flat land broken by large mounds of mountain (that she never saw but trusted existed). Her nephew was a grown *** man, coming over every now and again to keep her some company while her company slowly reduced her hours, told her to lay off working, her bones were getting brittle, would snap, a hip would pop, and really the way she stared without seeing into their eyes was just a little unnerving. She hated her job. Hated her nephew, who even without seeing his face could tell he was a large, sweaty pastey guy who constantly wiped his face with a towel. She wasn't sad or unpleasant, just real, honest with herself and others in ways people couldn't quite appreciate just yet, not yet. Not until one day they realize all isn't peachy and fine, and that everything is insane, and then they realize the insanity is what makes everything worth living for anyway. She could see this. With no sight, she could see and she would smile, then frown because she could feel the curiousity of onlookers trying to figure her out. People weren't for figuring out, they were for watching and moving along as if nothing had ever happend. And in this way, she moved.

flick, inhale, bubble, exhale.
clean my ******* carpet, i've let this go on long enough.
might as well clean the whole place, no one else will.
able bodied, but the joke's on them. the dirts on me, last week is in the ashtray.
flick, inhale. ******* clogged.
i got hasty again; i hate it when i do that ****. go through pages in books i read like i didn't write.
******* **** i write like someone's ever going to read.
the cup's half full of a whole year of nothing. the cup's dry.
i'm dry, high and dry. and to what extent?
flick, inhale, choke.
go back in.
there's black **** all over my keyboard.
that smell is back all over me, on the ends of my jacket sleeves.
i learned in anatomy what exactly it is.
i can't help but realize that i'm  a ******* specimen, taking articulate notes on intricacies i cannot even fathom about myself. i've never felt so blunderously powerful.
flick, bubble, inhale.  

i touch your hips to make sure you still exist. and to what extent? every extent, every branch, swing. left or right, you're right. stung just once, not me.
i drift away like it's an allergy, like it's some type of disease.
choke.
i never did clean my sheets. not since her, but after her, i lit it up like wildfire.
i repeat history, but i keep it clean. it's no one's fault these kinds of things are inherited.
like father, like daughter.
no, you cannot expect the morphine to help, if you don't want it to help.
**** it. flick, inhale, exhale.
**** it, if no body is looking. because you can't feel it if somebody's waiting, you wait to please.
**** it, twelve steps ahead is only twelve steps farther from the very place you want to be back at.
**** it. nothing will ever stay clean in this **** house, the dirt will always come back.
the proof is in the way he walks, that he is your son.
there is nothing to do but be patient.
fli-flick, inhale,




exhale.

The truth hurts
As bad as dirts
Better respect it's spurt
Stimulating like a glance in that mini skirt
generating images of hands in my shirt
Better be told with smile like a flirt
Than withholding enslaved in a chert

I met someone
we had some fun
then we were done

he made me so happy I couldn’t write
he made me so happy I didn’t bite
he made me so hopeful I thought we might...

I met this man
whose daddy hand
could burn my sand

we stole each other’s shirts
kissed each other where it hurts
planted flowers in these dirts

repainted stained and tainted glass
gave each other words to pass
decided not to pay for class
alas...

sand falls through spaces
between fingers’ interlaces
wind blows it in our faces

we shared some time
body soul and mind
there is no rewind

I said things I didn’t mean
Across the darkness like a screen
Pages burned and turned the scene

I woke up so early to work
Sometimes I don't even see my kids before going to work due to I might be late for work
Working early and going home late
My kids are right when they called me uncle instead of dad
That's madness in the highest order
I don't have time for my family but only for that man who hated me with passion
Yet I work for the growth and development of his company
That's madness

Working for someone who does not value nor care about my professional growth
Working for the man who always deduct my money whenever I attend class for my personal and professional growth which will also help his company
Yet I still work for this man
That's madness
There are many other companies out there
Yet I can't leave this monster am working for
That's madness

But yet I still have to do the job
Because I needed the job for money
I was called all sorts of name yet I responded yes sir accepting all the insult just for the sake of money
I give my best to the man who will never want me to be my own boss

If am told am mad will I argue it? No
If am told am insane of course the person is right about me
Worked under him for five years and no promotion and salary increment
Yet am still working with him

Madness is not when you run naked in the streets and started picking dirts on the floor
I said to my self
Am mad
And I know now
Which means is a step to solving my madness
I have to leave this monster
I have to leave this blood ******* vampire
I have to leave this man without human feelings

That was the solution to my madness

What's yours?

distant thoughts and torn up places
ridiculed hearts and demolished faces
depicted as love but all i feel is hate
if you surround yourself with flowers
you do not truly appreciate
the darkness in my mind
pitch black in every corner
my knowledge is a light
but this light is for me
only i can see
you try to get in
youre trying to win
a competition of mental instability
comparing yourself to the dirts fertility
you are not a flower
you are not a maze
you are a scared little girl
trapped in a haze
you think being sad is a trend?
well i'll tell you what, my friend
this depressions gonna trap you
and it will never end

You play and drenched in dirts
And you know how it hurts
It is enemy's art
But HIS grace fixed your heart

You taste a new life
No more grief  
Free from strife
Vindicated to be HIS wife

The enemy still lingers
Chasing you away from your SAVIOR
Still wanting you to put in danger
Don't get wrapped by his finger!

At your heart he still knocks
Say goodbye and turn back
Don't give him kisses
Cling to LORD's promises

When I almost reached home, I took some water from the ocean. It is as blue as the morning sky.
I passed the market, and bought
you a cup. It is as brownish as the earth I used to plough.
Then I put my best clothes, made of old rags. Sewed by my old lady.
And i walked over the plants, picked a blooming daffodil.
I did not have it wrapped, nor any ribbon to cover it up.
I ran to your garden, faster andfaster till I caught my breath.
I saw you standing there, in your garden of Eden, with a man holding your white hand.
He got roses. Red and white and pink and blue.
He got a sparkling bottle and a beautifully crafted wooden basket.
I just stood there, watching you. Watching him. Watching me.
I poured the blue water to the ground. Left the cup above the earth and the dirts.
Ripped my clothes into pieces of rags.
And i ran, as fast as the wind.
Heading to the ocean.

Mark the ink that you want to write
Feelings,intention to your soul body and mind
Its the thing that we want to express
Write everything that we want
No limitations
Spread the words
Ignore the dirts
Just focus on what you want 
Our spirit
Lives through
Living and floating
Like we're on top of the orange pluffy clouds
Moon were covered by the sun when its daytime
The sun that enlightens us to wake up every morning
We are the living soul
Scattered all over the World
Mind make us stress and depress to think of everything
Why don't we put them aside?
And enjoy for a little while
You don't need to force yourself
Just like everyone
Writing Is what we want
Cause every poet has their message to convey.

rags of cloud top the wind
a dirt of wind turns your face,
arranged,
a pace of cloud dirts your face
the top of wind rags your pace;
the lines, now, for you

your face a pace of rain
the wind a race of dirt

The stars came down from the sky on a happy evening
They were children for a night and played with madness and abundance
They danced the somber evening out in the ghost grass as it coveted all dirts.
Forgetting for so many moments, wreathed in the now
They'd  been burning with power, changing the fate of forever
And existence.
Songs of so much destiny were played out by their weary hearts.
And for a while they were not alone, foreseeing futures untold and impossible yet
Right in front of their eyes
Rescinded to the heavens forgetting naught
They burn as childrens glee in innumerable skies
Never to be lost.
Until the ghost grass sees the light of many days past.
And the stars come down once again
To dance in the vision of tomorrows wake
Until drawn back into nothingness

I've worn out my usefulness
yet again.
I ran my mouth until it became uninteresting.
And brought the world around me together
Its has become a cycle of forgetting what I forgot to let go
Deep inside all I want is love and understanding
I need to learn to do this for myself.
How can I expect to achieve that which works against my obvious self.
Everyone else sees it
why can't I.
My heart becomes a shallow grave stuffed with the bodies of memories I've blocked out
And only ever told two
My eyes became full of many dirts and
Salt
My life is a room filled with happy people who know my deepest darkness
And watch me cry myself to death while I drink.
The wind outside is cruel and unforgiving.
Speaking to me through the little voice in my head.
With faces innumerable falling in love with each other
Laughing
as I run away
Yet again.

Careless with their lives
They slog in infested slimy waters
In rubber shoes covered in holes
Merging bodies with all the inhabitants of the world beneath their feet
They trudge on

They’re deceptive
Picking up dirts to throw it back in
In those times they’re not seen
Or so they believe

They’ve reduced themselves
To the dirt they feed themselves
And they care not
Their pores clogged with infested slimy waters

Exhibiting animalistic behaviors
They’ve now become barbarians
“Buy us water”,
They cry together.
He who is living a deceptive life
Trudging around in the slimy waters
A place no one has sent them

They feed themselves with those slimy hands?
It’s no wonder their mate died
I stamp my feet in anger!
Arrrrrrrg!
Do they not see the danger?

I do not feel pity for them
Their state of being
Though perplexing it seems
They chose this.
Their families I weep for
Bodies coated with infested slimy waters
They go home.

Could I have seen them,
I’d tell you
in words—tunes—or hues.
but there’s more an eye can do

an eye can want.

cobblestones—
wooden benches
Skeleton trees, and pretty profiles
Sometimes, crimson skies
or crimson dirts— liquids even.
—she touches all she wants

          she wants all—
glimmering,
       teasing, deceiving—
Black boots on cement old
—yellowed pages sewed together.
  she wants all.

an eye can breathe.
And that was where they came
in caravans.
—inhale

perhaps snow-covered grass
   Or cracked desks
Perhaps trees laden with beings or
just—nothing.

Could I have heard them,
I’d tell you
in clinking bangles— carved ice— or weeping flutes
Could I have—
—could I.

they walked in— nay
flew. Nay, swam.
nay—
Could I have fathomed—

Carried torches, I think.
they marched deep into my caverns
—carried mirrors they.

what of the paw-prints engraved in mud
Crumpled letters
    lying naked in puddles— nay.
my caverns bore silk smoke over velvet nights.
dark—
and dreary and dying
and dead—

but they marched still
And their torches hissed.
Sapphire boots on sooty rugs—
     They marched.
They sang—nay.
painted— nay, moulded a
world out of cinders—
Nay.
Could I have touched, I'd know—

on every turn and every crease
They placed a mirror pure  
    as an infant’s tear
—or maybe a sharpened gem
who would dare to know—

In every dungeon and every hall
Their stares flickered like neon serpents
—nay.
Sun-licked butterflies, nay.
halos above mountains chaste—nay—
Could I have felt—

But one
—exhale
and they were no more.
Went into the rain perhaps,
or past moonlight
    maybe in pine trees under the sea
Could I have tracked them down—

but there’s more an eye can do
An eye can want.
light—
Between the dawn,
    between the darts
Children in smiling yards
light—
   inside coal,
Inside a broken sword—

She touches all she wants
   —she wants all.
and a ray falls on the mirror
and the mirror tosses it to the next
  and next, to the next—
Sun knits a web inside me.
beams and glitter—

Like a child’s song
or a kitten’s roar
—a war cry
Could I laugh like a spear
or mould the starlight into words
I’d tell you—

but the rays marched on
into me
   swift like kites
warm like— like iron.
nay—a mother’s hug
Nay,
beating drums
—or an armour’s clatter, nay.
Could I have known—

But there’s life in piercing screams
—And I was burning
But is it not a privilege
to watch the world wither
from the very roots of the flames?
to be their very mother—

when your wings melt
and towards the ground you
wilt
but you’re flying still—

A bond only of other's dreams..
A connection to be envied..
In your presence alone, I could thrive..
Flourish.
Flourish in bounties..
Bounties of smiles..
Bounties of joys..
Bounties of laughs..

Content.
My soul is content.
At peace in your company..
At peace in catastrophe..
At peace in nothing..
A nothing with you..
I am nothing, if just me..
How could I ever be..
If not with you..

You see..
You are me..
I feel you in me..
We are one another.
Disembodied in separation..
That's why all the pain..
That's why so much strain..
On this bond.
But what better bond?, God says..
Than a bond invincible by human force..
Invincible by earthly force..
Invincible by all this force..

But what better bond?
A bond not of stone..
A bond not of brick..
A bond not of metal..
A bond blessed by our God..
The God.
Thank you God.
An invincible God.

We are two of one piece made in the Heavens to be join again on the dirts of this earth.
So my love..
Don't fret..
Don't frown..
Smile.
Be delighted.
For we are richer than Wall Street.
For nothing green could price our gem.