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"coherency" poems
Your eyes. I can't stop writing about them. I can't stop dreaming about them gleaming like sunlight beaming into the windows of my soul. And I've been meaning to tell you- Heighten the blinds. I can't stop fiending to be the reflection in your infliction The mirroring of eyes, my line of sight in your line of vision Our pupils don't just collide, they cause a collision And uh, The precision of your gaze fogs all coherency to a haze And it's seeming There's a thousand words teeming off the levees of my lips But you got me in a daze and the waves crash silent See inside I'm screaming They say the flames radiated from desire are the fires most violent And I feel your vibes like radiation; Hazardous to both mind and body. Detrimental to the soul. I believe in whole this is not an illusion They say the eyes never hide from the truth -and the truth never lies- See, I've already eyed your eyes I'm not convinced this is confusion I've come to the conclusion that If I confided in you, Could you agree it's a delusion You've been opening the window; You want to be Inside.
0
Dec 3, 2012
Dec 3, 2012 at 4:54 PM UTC
Insightful
I notice it, I notice it's flaws. I see its texture, I witness the shapes and metamorphic coherency's. It's all aligned in a wild pattern. Like walking in a catastrophic maze and never finding the ending. But to really observe profusely, the maze has its own pattern, agenda. Screaming to myself, aloud, I express myself grandiosely. It all makes perfect sense The missing piece is not missing, it never was, it was merely detaching. Detaching from all life forms itself, like a cell that does not belong to another. The maze was juxtaposed in its own creation. People were too simple to understand it. The jagged puzzle doesn't need another piece, it just needs a new formula, a new path, a new perspective, it needs to stay jagged in order to create more purposeful moments and inventions. Complexities reach a higher peak than ever before, if you try to straighten the puzzle and find a piece to fit in it, you destroying its true and only purpose. You cannot mold or fix something, you cannot sand it down. You just need to let it be. It's shapeless, it doesn't need a form, or a label. It just is what it is to be. And that is the secret. The contradiction needs to stay as the contradiction in order to invent the expedition.
0
Dec 13, 2021
Dec 13, 2021 at 3:34 PM UTC
The puzzle
Pertinaciously vituperative irrefragable determinism.  Inscrutable axis of spontaneities’ imaginative.  Perplexity’s prognosis to prospectus.  Elan vital’s preternatural perpetuity.  Cohesive coherency’s opaque opulence.  Space-time continuum’s natural induction expressed as identity.  Exponentially tangential imagination’s immaturity.  Entropy catalyst blonds.  Spaciotemporal telemetry tactician’s tellurian terrene.  Protractive analyses dimensional delineation.  Reflectively refractive positional empathy.  Prophylaxis protocol.  Objectified manifest's self inductive diminutive minutia iotas of interstitial edict.  Graspy greedy stingy frugal mingy minions.  Manumission’s indentured servant sail.
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Feb 5, 2016
Feb 5, 2016 at 12:52 AM UTC
Frabjously Vorpal
I'm sitting in a bar. A place where they all collect. They come together with smiling eyes and open hearts and sit, drink and just shoot the **** They are all noteworthy people, not a boring or reserved soul among the bunch. And they share stories of their highs, lows and purgatories. One of them, his name's Jimmy, tells the story he always tells when he's teetering between coherency and slop-talk. He tells of how he died. He hopped in his car one day, and boy did he love his cars. And that particular car, the one his heart stopped beating in, was his favorite. He sped down the road, his hair blowing in the wind and his hand beating the side of the door as he sang "Strangers in the Night" as it blasted through his radio speakers. He wasn't drunk, he never really was fond of drinking when he was still breathing (he says being dead is depressing and alcohol is the only thing that "assures" him). His car swerved sharply, it was raining, and he just couldn't control the hunk of metal. His head hit the windshield before he even knew what happened. Jimmy looked down at his Jack and Coke and smiled. His eyes, now drowning in salt water, glistened off the cheap fluorescent lights. He told me he never got to tell his mother he loved her. Never got to tell his girlfriend that he thought they were meant to be. Never got to show the world that the man hidden behind so many layers of insecurity and recklessness was a man that was going to span time, generations. And I look back at him, my mouth curling a little and told him that he might not have gotten to talk to his mother or his girlfriend... But he **** well made his mark. After all, he's in a bar filled with dozens of people with stories not unlike his own. And he's talking to me. Me, with my chest inflating and deflating as it filled and emptied itself of sugary oxygen. Me, with my eyes alive and blinking and shining with life. Me, who is alive. At least, I hope to God I am.
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Jan 15, 2013
Jan 15, 2013 at 7:16 PM UTC
I Sit in Bars and Listen to Dead People Talk
I'm sitting in a bar. A place where they all collect. They come together with smiling eyes and open hearts and sit, drink and just shoot the **** They are all noteworthy people, not a boring or reserved soul among the bunch. And they share stories of their highs, lows and purgatories. One of them, his name's Jimmy, tells the story he always tells when he's teetering between coherency and slop-talk. He tells of how he died. He hopped in his car one day, and boy did he love his cars. And that particular car, the one his heart stopped beating in, was his favorite. He sped down the road, his hair blowing in the wind and his hand beating the side of the door as he sang "Strangers in the Night" as it blasted through his radio speakers. He wasn't drunk, he never really was fond of drinking when he was still breathing (he says being dead is depressing and alcohol is the only thing that "assures" him). His car swerved sharply, it was raining, and he just couldn't control the hunk of metal. His head hit the windshield before he even knew what happened. Jimmy looked down at his Jack and Coke and smiled. His eyes, now drowning in salt water, glistened off the cheap fluorescent lights. He told me he never got to tell his mother he loved her. Never got to tell his girlfriend that he thought they were meant to be. Never got to show the world that the man hidden behind so many layers of insecurity and recklessness was a man that was going to span time, generations. And I look back at him, my mouth curling a little and told him that he might not have gotten to talk to his mother or his girlfriend... But he **** well made his mark. After all, he's in a bar filled with dozens of people with stories not unlike his own. And he's talking to me. Me, with my chest inflating and deflating as it filled and emptied itself of sugary oxygen. Me, with my eyes alive and blinking and shining with life. Me, who is alive. At least, I hope to God I am.
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4
Rocking, rocking Back and forth like the conversation Muttered between plumes of Cigarette smoke. "They owe me twenty three hundred, The hotels and motels - Eight in all." He's said it about eight times. Eight in all. "And the surveillance systems In the rooms. The guy in the FBI lobby Was talking. Said things. Better have my money 'Cause it's messed up to Take a man's money like that." I nod, agree. It's all I can do. He's talked about some officer, The white female down at Cherry Street Mission. He talks about the white male And the black male How they pass out cigarettes And one's a mean son of a ***** Who kicks people while they're Trying to sleep. I wonder who else has kicked him While he's been down. He's checking the clock again, Doing the math - Takes about an hour to walk To get to the kitchens. Good to get there early to Get a bite to eat. "'Cause man, they owe me Twenty three hundred dollars For the hotels and motels - Eight in all." Nine times, now. "You get what I'm saying, though? Isn't it messed up?" Isn't everything? Let him *** another smoke, He's down on his luck Though the FBI's got nothing To do with it. I've seen glimpses of coherency Here and there. Mentioned a brother who Couldn't give a **** Mentioned working in a Restaurant once. But all the while he's rocking And losing himself again in His head and the imaginations Of ****** plots and FBI contracts. I wonder what his last name is. I wonder if he remembers what His last name is. "And the guy in the FBI lobby Said they'd scrap up an extra grand For the trouble. Just takes time. Don't you think that's messed up, though? Don't you think that's ****** up?" Do I ever.
0
Mar 15, 2015
Mar 15, 2015 at 1:00 PM UTC
Eight In All
Rocking, rocking Back and forth like the conversation Muttered between plumes of Cigarette smoke. "They owe me twenty three hundred, The hotels and motels - Eight in all." He's said it about eight times. Eight in all. "And the surveillance systems In the rooms. The guy in the FBI lobby Was talking. Said things. Better have my money 'Cause it's messed up to Take a man's money like that." I nod, agree. It's all I can do. He's talked about some officer, The white female down at Cherry Street Mission. He talks about the white male And the black male How they pass out cigarettes And one's a mean son of a ***** Who kicks people while they're Trying to sleep. I wonder who else has kicked him While he's been down. He's checking the clock again, Doing the math - Takes about an hour to walk To get to the kitchens. Good to get there early to Get a bite to eat. "'Cause man, they owe me Twenty three hundred dollars For the hotels and motels - Eight in all." Nine times, now. "You get what I'm saying, though? Isn't it messed up?" Isn't everything? Let him *** another smoke, He's down on his luck Though the FBI's got nothing To do with it. I've seen glimpses of coherency Here and there. Mentioned a brother who Couldn't give a **** Mentioned working in a Restaurant once. But all the while he's rocking And losing himself again in His head and the imaginations Of ****** plots and FBI contracts. I wonder what his last name is. I wonder if he remembers what His last name is. "And the guy in the FBI lobby Said they'd scrap up an extra grand For the trouble. Just takes time. Don't you think that's messed up, though? Don't you think that's ****** up?" Do I ever.
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67
Dream/wake dr e a m wake suddenly there's no difference stand in front of a mirror stare at your reflection until nothing means a thing repeat your name are you real? is this real or are you s l e e p ing sleeping? ocean waves of oblivion crash wash away coherency hollow chocolate bunny mechanical robot toy "big brother is watching" Big brother evil eyes of microscopes and lasers wrap barbed wire around your chest douse your eyes in chilli sauce in desperation to feel something or anything failed sadly you are awake.
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Mar 29, 2013
Mar 29, 2013 at 12:39 AM UTC
Dream Weaver
In youth It came as a flood Almost senseless with the rush of expression Pouring from my hand; It could not keep pace with the ceaseless deluge from my mind Half-formed coherency No thought paid to the rules of Grammar, Spelling, Paragraphs Just a wrenching of the soul that demanded ink. Years later, studies of Shakespeare, Wordsworth, Tennyson A mind full of words that are not my own, I am Senseless with the inability to break this learned dam. Now nothing comes out right. My mind, it burns and burns and burns But nothing ever takes aflame.
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Sep 24, 2013
Sep 24, 2013 at 9:55 PM UTC
Unlearning
Words of deep love and longing Are lost on me, today. I've no whimsy to feed my prose, No form of coherency in my head. I'll write for the sake of writing. Rustling trees swelled with song birds Are mere echoes of a life outside To me. I feel like I'm suspended in zero gravity - My face tingles, My head is sluggish Like a hangover without the nausea. We've got potholes in our hearts And the construction's lasted for months So we just fill them all with sand and Call it a day. Integrated into a system That's forgotten the welfare Of the human soul. There's a trickle of sunlight And it's getting warmer. Summer's blossoming and I can't stand it. The beautiful solace of winter Melts away with my silence, While summer months boil blood And chaos chokes the air. These words I write are read Aloud in tremulous whispers - The only proof that they're real. Recited every night When I lay my head down And wonder about the difference Between what is evil And what is just a misled notion Of Righteousness. And everything else in between.
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Jul 2, 2015
Jul 2, 2015 at 10:45 AM UTC
Early Morning Musings
**the depths beyond light   of dark primordial fears ensnared in a trap of   winding dangerous paths     'tween passion and fire, horizons like ink clouded seas   of menacing madness and     drunkenness' sanity midst     psychobabble's inquisitions rushing rampant to devour   an overgrown hypothesis     of imagination's luxuriance    and anesthetics' coherency, taming perpetual motion    of  windswept emotions lingering in shadows of   moonbows after resolute   mind bending storms of    teeming reigns &      elusive transcendence   amid skillfully evasive grapples        beyond liberated rationality**
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Jun 6, 2015
Jun 6, 2015 at 9:29 AM UTC
Grappling with liberated rationality
Meaningless pushed and pulled through arbitrary dimensions Emulating differences in the same, the Fatal Contradiction Redefining the sane! Recombined fused with idle spinning. Forging the distorted lie, these lines in between with apparent coherency and ingenious discrepancies blurring the boundaries of this new systematic hell! Put in perspective these inconsequential banalities and childish banter all but shape the future reiterating the errors of yesterday Skewed Conceptualized Vizualized Realized Quantized ... Denied! how long was it before i fell? does it even matter? when even these parallel thoughts repel...
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Mar 14, 2013
Mar 14, 2013 at 7:39 AM UTC
Parallel Thought Repulsion
No matter what I do it happens again. I start to think of a starfish, and his eyes come to mind. Who is he? I don't really know, most of the time he has brown eyes. But it seems to be whoever I happen to fancy at that time. And its not as if that is seldom, because I seem to find beauty in almost everyone I am around. But with this, how am I supposed to let him come to me, when even though I am not looking I see potential. They are all so beautiful. his hair his writing his literacy his coherency his incarnation into his body And the thing that makes me pause? makes me wonder? space distance understanding intent origin All things that must be considered... Are you up for the task? Up for the unbending intent and the unwavering eyes. Most of us know what love feels like, at least the physical/emotional level, but can you tell me what it looks like, and what it does? Can you tell me something I don't already know. Not a fact but a truth? Can you show me that you're Him, without even trying, without it being the goal? This is what I want. I want the world, I want Him, to be with Her, and for us to be the vessels of that love. Can you give me eternity, without thinking it impossible? Can you look into my eyes, and I into yours, and both see the trauma and the lies, but to also see the truth that lies behind? And can we battle the demons inside, to find that truth, to know that truth. Will you destroy hordes of demons with me, and stand victorious by my side? Will you push off from shore towards battle, and fight the very gods to find me once more? Will you travel to the beginning of Thyme to find each and every form that love had ever taken? Will you love me, in every form that I take that is Her? Will you embrace every form that He has taken, and see yourself for the portal of divinity that you are? Will you travel to the end of the Earth, just to find a letter that says: Keep Looking
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Jul 14, 2013
Jul 14, 2013 at 11:49 PM UTC
How Far Will You Go?
No matter what I do it happens again. I start to think of a starfish, and his eyes come to mind. Who is he? I don't really know, most of the time he has brown eyes. But it seems to be whoever I happen to fancy at that time. And its not as if that is seldom, because I seem to find beauty in almost everyone I am around. But with this, how am I supposed to let him come to me, when even though I am not looking I see potential. They are all so beautiful. his hair his writing his literacy his coherency his incarnation into his body And the thing that makes me pause? makes me wonder? space distance understanding intent origin All things that must be considered... Are you up for the task? Up for the unbending intent and the unwavering eyes. Most of us know what love feels like, at least the physical/emotional level, but can you tell me what it looks like, and what it does? Can you tell me something I don't already know. Not a fact but a truth? Can you show me that you're Him, without even trying, without it being the goal? This is what I want. I want the world, I want Him, to be with Her, and for us to be the vessels of that love. Can you give me eternity, without thinking it impossible? Can you look into my eyes, and I into yours, and both see the trauma and the lies, but to also see the truth that lies behind? And can we battle the demons inside, to find that truth, to know that truth. Will you destroy hordes of demons with me, and stand victorious by my side? Will you push off from shore towards battle, and fight the very gods to find me once more? Will you travel to the beginning of Thyme to find each and every form that love had ever taken? Will you love me, in every form that I take that is Her? Will you embrace every form that He has taken, and see yourself for the portal of divinity that you are? Will you travel to the end of the Earth, just to find a letter that says: Keep Looking
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74
I told Halie she was beautiful today And she smiled and said “You’re handsome.”. I could tell immediately that there had been miscommunication. I returned that smile as if I could ever hope to mirror the beauty of hers’ and changed the subject but honestly, she was missing the point. ‘Handsome’ refers to features that are aesthetically pleasing whereas ‘beautiful’… ‘Beautiful’. It’s a word I try to avoid defining because I don’t think I know enough but just talking to her… Putting our foreheads together instead of our lips, I feel like I could write a bible about what that words means. I see more than anyone has seen of her yet. Sadly, herself included. I love you like a blind man, Hail Where it isn’t your body that keeps you in my mind, It is everything you are to me. You are the symbol of innocence, even after all this time I still find myself searching for words to say that could do you justice. Now I wrote a poem for Amy because of her looks. I wrote a poem for Megan because of the pain she caused me. I never wrote you a poem, Hail. Maybe I was afraid my words would fail To describe in detail the way your fingertips strike my nerves as flint strikes steel and throws sparks into my heart. I want to let words fall out of the front of my face and land at your feet as if they would have any semblance of coherency. When we’re touching, I can’t make words. I can’t rush to my first line of defense against the outside world because I don’t want to be defended from you. People hear my brazen declarations of love and I know They’re thinking exactly what I’m thinking. ‘In the grand scheme of my life, our relationship is the blink of an eye’. But if I can make you one promise and if I could only make you one, this would be it. I’m going to remember you, girl. Life is the tide that washes over the sand castles we've built together in this sandbox we call an adolescence, but I promise you that I will always remember the times I laid my heart bare for you to see how much I care. I promise upon this fluttering pulse I’ll always be Your something else.
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Jun 14, 2014
Jun 14, 2014 at 4:53 PM UTC
Your Something Else
I told Halie she was beautiful today And she smiled and said “You’re handsome.”. I could tell immediately that there had been miscommunication. I returned that smile as if I could ever hope to mirror the beauty of hers’ and changed the subject but honestly, she was missing the point. ‘Handsome’ refers to features that are aesthetically pleasing whereas ‘beautiful’… ‘Beautiful’. It’s a word I try to avoid defining because I don’t think I know enough but just talking to her… Putting our foreheads together instead of our lips, I feel like I could write a bible about what that words means. I see more than anyone has seen of her yet. Sadly, herself included. I love you like a blind man, Hail Where it isn’t your body that keeps you in my mind, It is everything you are to me. You are the symbol of innocence, even after all this time I still find myself searching for words to say that could do you justice. Now I wrote a poem for Amy because of her looks. I wrote a poem for Megan because of the pain she caused me. I never wrote you a poem, Hail. Maybe I was afraid my words would fail To describe in detail the way your fingertips strike my nerves as flint strikes steel and throws sparks into my heart. I want to let words fall out of the front of my face and land at your feet as if they would have any semblance of coherency. When we’re touching, I can’t make words. I can’t rush to my first line of defense against the outside world because I don’t want to be defended from you. People hear my brazen declarations of love and I know They’re thinking exactly what I’m thinking. ‘In the grand scheme of my life, our relationship is the blink of an eye’. But if I can make you one promise and if I could only make you one, this would be it. I’m going to remember you, girl. Life is the tide that washes over the sand castles we've built together in this sandbox we call an adolescence, but I promise you that I will always remember the times I laid my heart bare for you to see how much I care. I promise upon this fluttering pulse I’ll always be Your something else.
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46
I have scratched out my journey across a mountain of pages and each and every time I’ve filed away a book, I’ve mourned the trees, compassion is not something I lack. I have been thankful that they took each and every step with me and as each notebook closes I retreat to my back yard to plant another seed. I’m happy to give back. The million litres of ink that have been bleed beneath my fingers and have spread to stain my hands as my life raced across the pages has not been spilled in vain if one day the moldy old box is opened and the dust is blown from the covers and a futuristic version of me delights in the find, and hears beyond the echo of the scratching of tortuous proportions to see a life that was fun filled pain. So much chatter, most of it doesn’t matter, little tidbits float along on a swollen creek that has never actually seen much rain. Tiny little letters run across a barren land and accidentally collide into one another because they have no coherency while all the Big words sit in their gilded towers and watch, and wait, drinking the finest Port they can find while mocking the chaos below with ridicule and disdain. Little bits and pieces have been scattered to the wind... Thrown into the air, as an offering of peace, to the ancient scourge that is the birds. I guess this would probably make much more sense if I could only just find the right words…. Jan 9 (two thousand and something)
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Mar 15, 2014
Mar 15, 2014 at 5:05 AM UTC
Finding the Words
To the crushing of bones when you implode; my stubborn skull was no match for the concrete. I flew face first- now I am ground into dirt, or the dirt is ground into me wherever I’m bleeding. I can’t clean these wounds sober. this girl? you won't know her. my jaw is popping- is there any chance of that stopping soon? The moon is closing in on the sun, threatening to collide and I've grown wearing of hiding in the night. I'd just like some medical attention. My knees, my knees... I forgot to mention they're all ****** I don't have the money to call off for a few days. can I sleep on my face? my pain is evidence of my shame- these wounds just my physical disgrace. I'll regain coherency at a quarter till three with a swollen, puffy face and vinegar in my veins. just add it to the list of blundering strains maybe some time in the future I’ll be able to worry about it again. it never ends. my new lamp, shattered my clean sheets dirtied and tattered. my left ear is buzzing- everything has gone fuzzy and my head is numb and throbbing. maybe I’ll sleep well tonight, and my nightmares will find me without any fight left in my dried out bones and pseudo studio home. c.m. draft/original: 8.5.14 posted: 1.7.15 revision/edit: 1.8.15
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Jan 7, 2015
Jan 7, 2015 at 10:06 PM UTC
Post Haste
Speed on the Mirror highway Lanes and lines One after no where On and off-ramp Stuck in traffic Lucid acid Flaccid masses Classes filled With stupid ***** Crooked cops And ******* crashes Head-on collision Illusive vision Elusive division Intrusive mission Through a tube And up your nose **** who knows Where nowhere goes How to get there, Why I'm going, What I'm doing, Who'll be there. I have no plan, Nothing is written In stone. I'll Figure something out. Of sight and in My mind. I'm coming Short of coherency. Free Writing poetry never works In my favor. I'm just drifting Away into the End of the dark sideline. Through a tube, spiraling, Stumbling mumbling, Blundering blindly and Mindfully striding Across infinite tiles Endless, black and white, Checkerboards. I am the Grey area.
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Dec 3, 2009
Dec 3, 2009 at 1:21 PM UTC
Equinoxious
He brought her along, only wanting to get laid. She introduced herself as awkward, 'though first impressions rarely amount to truth. I watched him flirt with her; and watched her try to pull away. But, it's Friday. Gotta get ****** up. What else is there to do in life? She drank more, he drank more: "Nah, guys, I'm totally cool to drive." He slurred as he spun donuts to impress the tipsy woman. His hands inched to her thighs. His eyes seized her ******* who needs to see the road? We made it to the birthday, a standard college party. She and I sat across one another at the table. She smiled and started small talk: "Oh, I love Vonnegut, have you read Sirens of Titan?" We kept drinking as he went out to pick up more ***** "Of course I play video games, they got me through high school." He took longer than he intended but neither of us complained. "Isn't chemistry only the language of biology?" Time passed quickly, or slowly, either way it's dead and buried. She started to stumble, huddled closer to me, tried to move from him when he returned. She lost coherency, she looked at me, muddied; did she have something to say? Had she asked, she would have received, but silence heralds silence and unvoiced wants remain unfulfilled. He knew she was loosing interest, that, of course, I'd gotten in the way. He pulled me aside: "It's time for you to leave. I just want to get laid and you're ******* it all up." He drove us both home, hand grasping her thigh, but she didn't notice; she was barely alive. I suppose this is how it goes: some nights you make friends that you never see again.
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Jan 19, 2013
Jan 19, 2013 at 10:40 AM UTC
Last Friday of Break
He brought her along, only wanting to get laid. She introduced herself as awkward, 'though first impressions rarely amount to truth. I watched him flirt with her; and watched her try to pull away. But, it's Friday. Gotta get ****** up. What else is there to do in life? She drank more, he drank more: "Nah, guys, I'm totally cool to drive." He slurred as he spun donuts to impress the tipsy woman. His hands inched to her thighs. His eyes seized her ******* who needs to see the road? We made it to the birthday, a standard college party. She and I sat across one another at the table. She smiled and started small talk: "Oh, I love Vonnegut, have you read Sirens of Titan?" We kept drinking as he went out to pick up more ***** "Of course I play video games, they got me through high school." He took longer than he intended but neither of us complained. "Isn't chemistry only the language of biology?" Time passed quickly, or slowly, either way it's dead and buried. She started to stumble, huddled closer to me, tried to move from him when he returned. She lost coherency, she looked at me, muddied; did she have something to say? Had she asked, she would have received, but silence heralds silence and unvoiced wants remain unfulfilled. He knew she was loosing interest, that, of course, I'd gotten in the way. He pulled me aside: "It's time for you to leave. I just want to get laid and you're ******* it all up." He drove us both home, hand grasping her thigh, but she didn't notice; she was barely alive. I suppose this is how it goes: some nights you make friends that you never see again.
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60
*it would be easiest to switch the lights off and bemuse whether there's a light-bulb in the room.* but of course psychoanalysis originated in the upper tiers of society, where people found dreams unappealing unless interpreted by third party associates of psychiatry and put into nice and neat boxes of theory... of such people we know as perhaps neither butchers or surgeons, who's only obstructions in life were but dreams, and dreams in themselves also obstructive because of lack of coherency and soluble meaning, perhaps even not sexually potent enough; only now the backlash of digging into the unconscious greedily like dwarfs mining for precious jewels, to have merely woken a flip side of all that theorising that came from the 19th century, you hear so much of the balrog that slay durin vi, this bane of durin: oh it walks among us, it does indeed - with a cartesian duality whip of medicinal splinters etched into an almost dark ages account of knowledge: to have us treat mentality and physicality of a negation of ease as equally paired to be chiral - indeed politicians speak of mental health and physical ailments as distinct - but gentler the thought pressing down on the cranium than an elephant in stilettos likewise - but why so? for all this previous theorising ambitions in a safe environment of natural hallucinogenic encounters of sleep - safe there the egoistic scalpel of this branch of medicine of a straitjacket - safe there indeed, and perhaps even more with a placebo effect acceptable; but by god! this scalpel wants to censor thinking, even thought that extend into our ontological bereavement of being but mortal - even if suicide is a problem, the more methodological such thinking becomes the more ineffective it becomes, and for some strange reason, thoughts of suicide (when trained) have this strange way of prolonging mortality, the carpe diem of reasoning, after all, all things possess the concern for two things that interchange, and in that interchange the + can become a -, or as i say... take to committing yourself to a gruesome end... hara-kiri (seppuku), and you won't.
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Jan 11, 2016
Jan 11, 2016 at 9:02 AM UTC
the misty mountain dirge
*it would be easiest to switch the lights off and bemuse whether there's a light-bulb in the room.* but of course psychoanalysis originated in the upper tiers of society, where people found dreams unappealing unless interpreted by third party associates of psychiatry and put into nice and neat boxes of theory... of such people we know as perhaps neither butchers or surgeons, who's only obstructions in life were but dreams, and dreams in themselves also obstructive because of lack of coherency and soluble meaning, perhaps even not sexually potent enough; only now the backlash of digging into the unconscious greedily like dwarfs mining for precious jewels, to have merely woken a flip side of all that theorising that came from the 19th century, you hear so much of the balrog that slay durin vi, this bane of durin: oh it walks among us, it does indeed - with a cartesian duality whip of medicinal splinters etched into an almost dark ages account of knowledge: to have us treat mentality and physicality of a negation of ease as equally paired to be chiral - indeed politicians speak of mental health and physical ailments as distinct - but gentler the thought pressing down on the cranium than an elephant in stilettos likewise - but why so? for all this previous theorising ambitions in a safe environment of natural hallucinogenic encounters of sleep - safe there the egoistic scalpel of this branch of medicine of a straitjacket - safe there indeed, and perhaps even more with a placebo effect acceptable; but by god! this scalpel wants to censor thinking, even thought that extend into our ontological bereavement of being but mortal - even if suicide is a problem, the more methodological such thinking becomes the more ineffective it becomes, and for some strange reason, thoughts of suicide (when trained) have this strange way of prolonging mortality, the carpe diem of reasoning, after all, all things possess the concern for two things that interchange, and in that interchange the + can become a -, or as i say... take to committing yourself to a gruesome end... hara-kiri (seppuku), and you won't.
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49
"It's not an operation unless its going to be optional" said the elderly *** chap. Not thinking to rational today, (thoughts in a head) "-for what is a compliment if its given in haste." (responsive only to ones self) "I'm not gonna be there always, only some of time and most of the time is gonna be now." (invoking nothing but in a thought) So it was in-coherency to modern day currency. Perfect in flaw, dried in brown rice while being sentenced to a decorative cork topped glass jar.
0
Apr 19, 2015
Apr 19, 2015 at 4:01 PM UTC
nuevo 2
I can feel myself shutting down Again And I hate it I want to speak But I can't seem to wrangle my thoughts into coherency My words are Lodged Caught Stuck In the depths of my throat My feelings have Overloaded Jammed themselves Into the crevices of my brain With no plans of making an appearance Please Make it stop Crack me open Guide me Help me
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Mar 4, 2014
Mar 4, 2014 at 11:20 PM UTC
Help
It was hard Straining to hear your words Trying to keep a conversation, not just a monologue Trying to fill that sterile, silent room With life and sound and joy It was hard Seeing your strong hands Always creating, building, giving Growing inescapably weaker Noticing the windows of coherency Moments of quips and quirks Growing inescapably shorter It was a lot harder Waking up and with a breath of bitter melancholy relief Finding 5 missed calls
0
Jun 24, 2018
Jun 24, 2018 at 8:26 AM UTC
Grandfather
Sitting in the dark Eyes closed not sleep Resting the body Expanding the mind Bring forth the drums Slow everything down Crush down emotions The dreams that might Any legends of the mind Tune up the mind Focus out the body Ignore it's whines Feel the blood slow Turn off its feelings Let breathing flow Ears pick the smallest Another distraction Tone it down Relax each muscle Spin coherency away Focus on the pounding Rhythmic, stone on leather Heartbeats pound, thump War drums of bringing And the taking of life Breath, set it's tempo Draw that tarot card See, read the choice Picked by the drum Of swords, a nine Still closed, sleep not close Bring me fire, bring fight Give me anything, but this See inside, see so far Drift not, stay on track See the ace, fill your cups Seek wine, lose your mind Twist that thought Thunder drums Lightning fast Hear it's crack Break the sky Split my world Falling with drums Twinkling bits of star No need to question Blood pumps the beat Violent, just beneath Calm meditation No movement betrays Look to her A queen, regal In her cups Then turn away Apologize, haute glare Let it fall, let it drift No need to fight Carry not for death Let it out, set free Close off emotions Seek plenty, find peace Find the rhythm seek pace Don't let sword or cups Wreck logic or spread Bind damage to pain Let darkness fall Hear the symphony Drift in silence Float out slow Kiss you in sleep
0
Sep 3, 2014
Sep 3, 2014 at 9:08 PM UTC
Symphony of Darkness
She hasn’t left her room for three days. She hasn’t left her house in two weeks. She hasn’t gone into town in a month before that. She hadn’t been rationing her food supply on purpose but it’s what ended up happening anyway. She’s laying on the floor, now. She’s been laying on the floor and staring at the ceiling for hours. She knows that the ceiling is a muted, toneless, comforting beige but all she can focus on is the creeping gray shadows that feel like a physical barrier between herself and the rest of the world. She knows that these shadows are only really in her head, but four nights ago the angle of the sun coming through her curtains had been just right and all she could focus on was an oppressive mass of shadow that froze her in her tracks and locked her inside her own mind as it crawled nearer and nearer. That horrifying moment had only been that, a moment, but now that she’s locked away she doesn’t even have the energy to start looking for the key. She’s been lying on the floor staring at her not-gray ceiling for hours. She has no idea what day it is because every time her mind starts to right itself into something resembling coherency there is another shudder of uncertainty and the physical shadows in her mind slither over her more tightly and she is left again a shell of herself, dead, glassy eyes staring, seeing nothing and the ceiling, both at once. However, if there is one thing she can focus on longer than anything else, it is the shadows. The ones that wriggle in the corners of her periphery and make up her cage. Even if her mind can’t pull itself together enough to name the days, she can at least count how many times the shadows were at their weakest and instead of reaching towards the silhouette of her body, she can at least count the three times where she felt the light pressure of warmth on her skin. It lasted a little while, she remembers, vaguely, but it was never long before the briefest change in the shadows illuminated their own movement again. Again, if coherency was anywhere near possible she might question how her strict one-way mind can connect that this means that days have passed, but for now she just waits in numb agony for nothing and everything in her mind to make sense. She has no idea if she is awake or asleep and really, doesn’t care.
0
May 2, 2019
May 2, 2019 at 2:57 PM UTC
Preface
She hasn’t left her room for three days. She hasn’t left her house in two weeks. She hasn’t gone into town in a month before that. She hadn’t been rationing her food supply on purpose but it’s what ended up happening anyway. She’s laying on the floor, now. She’s been laying on the floor and staring at the ceiling for hours. She knows that the ceiling is a muted, toneless, comforting beige but all she can focus on is the creeping gray shadows that feel like a physical barrier between herself and the rest of the world. She knows that these shadows are only really in her head, but four nights ago the angle of the sun coming through her curtains had been just right and all she could focus on was an oppressive mass of shadow that froze her in her tracks and locked her inside her own mind as it crawled nearer and nearer. That horrifying moment had only been that, a moment, but now that she’s locked away she doesn’t even have the energy to start looking for the key. She’s been lying on the floor staring at her not-gray ceiling for hours. She has no idea what day it is because every time her mind starts to right itself into something resembling coherency there is another shudder of uncertainty and the physical shadows in her mind slither over her more tightly and she is left again a shell of herself, dead, glassy eyes staring, seeing nothing and the ceiling, both at once. However, if there is one thing she can focus on longer than anything else, it is the shadows. The ones that wriggle in the corners of her periphery and make up her cage. Even if her mind can’t pull itself together enough to name the days, she can at least count how many times the shadows were at their weakest and instead of reaching towards the silhouette of her body, she can at least count the three times where she felt the light pressure of warmth on her skin. It lasted a little while, she remembers, vaguely, but it was never long before the briefest change in the shadows illuminated their own movement again. Again, if coherency was anywhere near possible she might question how her strict one-way mind can connect that this means that days have passed, but for now she just waits in numb agony for nothing and everything in her mind to make sense. She has no idea if she is awake or asleep and really, doesn’t care.
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6
It don't mean nothin' until we make it up, lean in to me, we think we have ra tov wisdom understanding with science, we can hold this thought, we can think this thing though we see ghosts roughly speaking gh aha silent though through ghost thoughts ghuking unholy common thoughts, be spoken letters letting us just think, ritually, just right, the spin and the coherency, being on point, this point, perceptual me happening in ever after you before me were in ever after ever before at this point, right here, prior to the ritual pending, the core correction essential for me, loosing as some part of me wishes to be ready to be read and held as true, self evident, pre- sent from beauty and truth, to prove us both here body and soul, all the people think they know, but, really, the word of life, in truth, divides soul from spirit, the form between us tonight, the distance sensed the thought let live in lines I find tying me in one mind both hands in flux… dancing letters, keys to this letting next experience inside, to know my measure, mete for me, she who balances he who wished to pray, letters let us take and receive, in truth, our daily bread, and essential other formal additions to daily bread alone, water, with fire power, rain and lightning, and ozone smell, or "petrichor," ichor of stones, groundust wetted with gigantic drops, drumming on a tin roof. ------------------- Look, man, this is what I do. Two hand writing machine interface taking my worth to the scale we need for trade, my best, my easy peacock cry for help, look into my  eyes, see we no longer wished for what we have, so we have it. Yes, for now. the time gone riverwise, flows past into tomorrow, when I go to the rest and relaxing place introspecting expecting lost knacks patience perfect. just in time, not for ever.
0
Jul 29, 2025
Jul 29, 2025 at 9:32 PM UTC
Sowing expectations and fertile hope
It don't mean nothin' until we make it up, lean in to me, we think we have ra tov wisdom understanding with science, we can hold this thought, we can think this thing though we see ghosts roughly speaking gh aha silent though through ghost thoughts ghuking unholy common thoughts, be spoken letters letting us just think, ritually, just right, the spin and the coherency, being on point, this point, perceptual me happening in ever after you before me were in ever after ever before at this point, right here, prior to the ritual pending, the core correction essential for me, loosing as some part of me wishes to be ready to be read and held as true, self evident, pre- sent from beauty and truth, to prove us both here body and soul, all the people think they know, but, really, the word of life, in truth, divides soul from spirit, the form between us tonight, the distance sensed the thought let live in lines I find tying me in one mind both hands in flux… dancing letters, keys to this letting next experience inside, to know my measure, mete for me, she who balances he who wished to pray, letters let us take and receive, in truth, our daily bread, and essential other formal additions to daily bread alone, water, with fire power, rain and lightning, and ozone smell, or "petrichor," ichor of stones, groundust wetted with gigantic drops, drumming on a tin roof. ------------------- Look, man, this is what I do. Two hand writing machine interface taking my worth to the scale we need for trade, my best, my easy peacock cry for help, look into my  eyes, see we no longer wished for what we have, so we have it. Yes, for now. the time gone riverwise, flows past into tomorrow, when I go to the rest and relaxing place introspecting expecting lost knacks patience perfect. just in time, not for ever.
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63
A thousand story's in my head, Twisting, tangling, Unexpected bend, Words flying onto paper, Fingers frantically catching up, Brain sorting into semi coherency, Characters mingling, blending, creating, Sorting into many words, Describing an image in its whole, Catching fragments, Sewing a patchwork quilt of words, Write on!
0
Jan 15, 2016
Jan 15, 2016 at 10:18 AM UTC
Writer