"camilla" poems
My phone clamped to my ear,
Listening to you think.
We were punning.
(We would combine categories like ‘The Royal Mail’ and ‘Sea Life’,
And come up with things like Octo-post and
Cod-espondence.)
That night it was ‘Crockery’ and ‘Celebrities’.
You thought of Plate Moss
And
Camilla Parker Bowl.
Sep 26, 2013
Sep 26, 2013 at 7:31 PM UTC
Victoria Falls
with all its mighty battering roar
was merely background noise
as I wondered what Camilla was thinking of me.
Machu Picchu from the sun-gate at dawn?
I was distracted by Helen,
and whether she'd keep in touch
when she returned to Britain.
Debbie eclipsed the solar eclipse -
The outback rolling into premature darkness
spectacular, sure
but nothing to what she was doing to my heart.
But you and I
feel the simple Scottish lawn
beneath our four feet
together, complete.
Sep 25, 2011
Sep 25, 2011 at 3:15 PM UTC
recently in a women's magazine
I read an article
about the Duchess of Cornwall
being most ungracious
toward Princess Mary of Denmark
*the Duchess can be a very catty *****
especially when Charles
is eyeing something of more appeal
but Camilla seems to have forgotten
her come hither days
when she was conducting
an affair with the Prince of Wales
under his wife's nose
the protocols in royal circles
have become less civil
and it is about time
she on her high horse
was more convivial
where the crown
and matters of state
are paramount
the Queen should avail
her son's missus
of a polite dismount
Mar 8, 2017
Mar 8, 2017 at 8:37 PM UTC
About time,
I've paid my dues I've crossed the line,
This moment I thought would never come,
Is in my grasp, the deed now done.
Don't get me wrong, I loved my Mum,
But all that passed would surely stun
Even a saint or the Lord above,
So tiring being an aimless dove.
Now I'm ready to take the world by storm,
Show them my worth, no longer act forlorn,
The wife I always wanted by my side,
I can finally get into my Kingly stride.
The Little ****** that remains,
Harry's willful character that pains,
I've summoned experts to hear what they might say
To finally obtain a sample of his mysterious DNA.
I'm not claiming he's not mine,
But as Americans would shout, ‘I wouldn't bet a dime’,
Thank goodness I've got my other boy,
A stand-up chap that brings me nothing but pure joy.
As to Camilla, my soulmate from the start,
From whom they never could tear me far apart,
She now stands by me as my Queen,
You saw me beam with joy like a lovestruck teen.
Don't get me wrong,
I'm painfully aware my reign may not be long,
But while I'm here, I plan to make my mark,
Understanding this job is no cakewalk in the park.
I've got the Aussies wanting to jump ship.
The Canadians on their own perennial trip,
The Scots plotting for a Clansman King,
And Parliament seeking me do next to nothing.
Yet I've got a plan,
Something that will surely stun,
Become a multimedia star,
And thus take them all across the bar.
I can jig, dance and sing,
Fly helicopters, do pretty much of anything,
Plant trees, help save our World
How can all of this be thought absurd.
Politicians just blow smoke,
Send their countries near flat broke,
I instead bring Billions in
Collecting smiles from wheresoever I have been.
That said let me enjoy my moment in the sun,
Reflecting on all that's been and done,
My resolve is firm, my duty clear,
My life's work is aimed at all, both far and near.
So rest easy, enjoy the ride,
Sailing smoothly on a flowing tide,
Over a thousand years in the making
My oath is one of giving and not taking.
May 8, 2023
May 8, 2023 at 11:31 AM UTC
As the police
arranged their shield
You stood upfront
and raised your fist.
Your demand
for humanitarian reforms
was answered by beatings
yet you resisted
and struggled
and clenched your fist
and waived your flag
as thousand marched across the streets.
Stones trailed behind you.
I'm glad you're not the type of woman
who burn a life
in the bar
in apathy.
Apr 7, 2013
Apr 7, 2013 at 12:42 PM UTC
Pay attention everyone said Lilliput
I have an important announcement
We're going to have a wonderful picnic
For our family on Thursday , poppits only
The groans were heard all over the palace
Are we riding there , asked Horsey Anne
No we jolly well are not
And you scrum half Zara , are not either
We're motorcading it , without staff
Another really loud royal moan
We are each taking everything we need
And that includes you ex pork of York
'OOHH NNOO' she gurgly grunted
Less of that , and NO toe suckers allowed
Nor arrive in a kiddies helicopter either
And you Wills missus more clothing
You make my blue blood run cold
Next Thursday then , you picnickers
What have you brought asked Lilliput
Silver knives and forks hoarsed Anne
Paper plates grunted Flossy Fergie
Plastic cups , whimpered Wills missus
Lav paper for tissues, gidded up Zara
Big tablecloth bellowed Camilla
Have none of you brought food said Lilliput
'NO' they all mardily whinnied
None of us even thought about it
And you mumsy H.R.H. what have you brought
'NOBODY questions me , you pipsqueaks
LET'S ALL GO HOME NOW !
May 26, 2015
May 26, 2015 at 2:53 AM UTC
We’re walking through magnetic fields.
We approach the stop sign yield.
How lovely someone’s name
“WC Field”
Bondman what a con man.
Going West “May I May West” I’m a fan.
What names do we like the best?
Rosetta, she keeps smiles and
gets wet-a his eyes tell her
he’s in the sunset to get her
Someone to bond “At-Last”
The different era desperate housewife.
One is Rosetta meets one of her friends
Violet-ta what drama Ra Rata
Frank Sinatra says well that’s life.
Holding two names eyes of a magnet
in one hand.Powerful love garnet
God’s name expressed love command
So sacred in a new land.
Rosetta please get your friend.
He addresses her as a poinsettia.
Garlands Of Judy extend.
The poinsettia his finger points
until Emma visits hum?
What is she up too?
She is quite the dilemma give her the evil eye.
The violin sounds Heather lilac meets Violet-ta.
Beatles play with “Sweet Loretta.”
Sipping Camilla Cafe I want to hold your hand.
She marries her best man best-spilled the margarita.
How’s Rebecca organically has grown to Omega?
Movie star suspenseful Marx Garbo so Groucho.
What a pain Mr. Panetta eating his
words Mucho gracias
Shark -fin soup Chinese delicacy.
He bite’s the bruschetta his ballot Presidency.
How he expressed A secret Emma the Emmy
Got caught in a big Dilemma with Remy
The wrong ***** of a vendetta
Smell the coffee wake up you betta or else?
That computer mouse true or false.
Billy Joel stranger met his counterfeiter
Going Uptown girl sings on his piano expressed A
comment to kiss her.
But you’re a stranger?
Rumors with leaks of plumber’s Raven birds.
Don’t flood my words.
A perfect rose how he gave it to Rosetta.
We need more names what about Tatiana.
I saw her dancing at the “Copacabana Wella.”
A-Men that’s how I met Rosetta.
Jun 28, 2018
Jun 28, 2018 at 12:27 PM UTC
The sun now shines brightly
All my work now behind me
As I travel with an anticipation
All my Sunrise days are free
As a chorus of harmonic misfits
All gather and collect
In a field full of love
As all my friends old and new
Join me in their golden thread
As we sparkle as we tread
I met a gentle Irish girl
who's eye's held me softly
While she tentatively listened
To the music play
Before she retired that day
From a distant different
World far far away
I saw her hold her flute
Cherishing it so sweetly
As she poured her love
So very deeply
How I loved the way
She held her flute
The sky a glowing orange
In the dead of that night
What an amazing sight
As the stars rattled and clattered
The heavens a pin ball machine
But why when I see all of this
Dos my heart say I MISS
As I look back and see
The way the Irish girl
Held her flute
This is just Ritz glitz , razzmatazz
A superficial and chemical reaction
If I could only let her know
How much I saw you
The way you held your flute
May you be blessed
And the heavens with you
With every caution you took
For I , saw you !
As I cried with every pill I took
As I danced and cried
And danced and cried
For I took your love
And like a fine china
I smashed it to pieces
And ground it into
Pills , pills , pills
Give me more pills
Because who gives a ****
when you are on this ****
And who the *****
Camilla anyway
The gladness that I do now cling
Is that she could not follow me
As she is a bright butterfly
That dances and play
Soaked in the light of day
And I am the dull moth
Lost in her darkness
Attracted to the artificial light
That burns through my soul
As I am all burning up
And it is so **** hot
yeah mate yeah mate
I do not regret
As the world I live
Is full of friends and wonder
But i can still carry regrets
And careful of artificial light
Because I would
Love to know her flute
For she understood
I could tell
The way she held her flute
Jun 6, 2014
Jun 6, 2014 at 6:04 PM UTC
Will and Kate,
Take my advice,
To give your new girl
A lovely life.
Choose a moniker
That'll be a thrilla,
Elizabeth, Victoria,
Diana as the middle,
Those are fine,
But not Camilla.
May 3, 2015
May 3, 2015 at 8:21 AM UTC
A composition plays softly
I listen
A caressing sense so cooling
Feeling deeply
A velvety mistress
Appeared
Lovely
As a ingenuous tigress
Tender like a lamb
Grazing in green pasture
A woman so committed
To love suddenly
Emergence in a blink
Abundance is she
Our moment in time
In a vision her beauty fades
As I open my eyes
She is no more
Sep 7, 2009
Sep 7, 2009 at 11:22 PM UTC
Amperage of connections fallen out and lost
No carnival party to revive.
Ashore astronomical beholders vision,
A needle through the rich man's eye!!!!
Camilla scents,
Canopied distinguished in canistered tents.......
Century carols confine the interstate mind!!!
Circulation is impatient wherein clots block chloroform vine's....
Wed-lock intensifiers waiteth to be fed,
Trapped,
Packed,
Chained to their beds....
Hath thou lost thyself yet???
Jul 4, 2015
Jul 4, 2015 at 11:59 AM UTC
I like Charlie;
Charlie talks to trees.
never understood though why;
he ventured,
'tween Camilla's,
knees.
guess you "had to be there."
when,
ying became his yang,
Diana wasn't looking
then.
Camilla's legs went TWANG.
Yeah,, I like Charlie;
Charlie talks to trees.
and he's a fully paid up member
of the lumpen bourgeoisie.
God bless Charlie.
Feb 27, 2011
Feb 27, 2011 at 9:16 AM UTC
They married in the merry month of May
at Windsor Castle - Hey Noney Ney!
So, Meghan and Prince Harry
decided not to tarry.
Now a baby’s on the way.
next Spring - they say..
The Queen’s amused
The Duke’s bemused
Prince Charles enthused:
saying to Duchess Camilla,
“A Jolly Good Show! Oh Joy!”
Said she: “A girl or boy?”
Said HRH "Don't tease.
One or the other -
no transgender if you please,
nor talk of Succession
to threaten my Accession.”
TOBIAS
Oct 16, 2018
Oct 16, 2018 at 4:32 AM UTC
The real garter
a vicarious slaughter
the royal flush never bought it
Dodi craoked on it
while Camilla caught it.
Apr 12, 2023
Apr 12, 2023 at 3:07 PM UTC
A
sword
for the sworn
A
palace
for the queen
A
bride
for the estate
A
head
above his fireplace
A
stone henge
of cobbled grace.
May 9, 2023
May 9, 2023 at 2:14 PM UTC
As she looked down
and blushed
to my comment,
she shyly looked up to me
and said,
"My friends did warn me
that you were a
silver tongued devil."
And as our eyes met,
for an instant,
I believed it.
But something
extraordinarily
occured-
I fell for her.
Apr 14, 2015
Apr 14, 2015 at 5:29 PM UTC
It smells so sweet
Just like a treat
Of cinnamon and vanilla
Gingerbread and camilla
Oranges and pine
Walnuts and lime
And don't forget the thyme
There's a bit of mint
Inside a pint
Rosemary, sage and lavender
Combined in a suspender
And just a breeze
Of anise
Some cloves and nutmeg
And last but not least
Of course, chocolate!
Feb 14, 2020
Feb 14, 2020 at 6:17 PM UTC
Camilla owes her crown to Diana.
If Diana had been a traditional royal Spouse
She’d have turned a blind eye to Charles’s betrayal
And just enjoyed the perks of Queenhood.
But - alas - she loved that perfidious son-of-a-monarch
And couldn’t abide being only his *******
Had not she stormed away from that Sovereign Throne
Madam Parker Bowles would have had to remain
The grasping and greedy, outstandingly common
***** that she was and will ever remain.
And Charles could have then joined in the very long line
Filled with unfaithful Kings and their cheated-on queens.
LJM
May 6, 2023
May 6, 2023 at 12:57 PM UTC