PAG-ASA/ISKOLAR NG BAYANG DUKHA
Madilim na sulok,
Kung san nagdurugo ang mga palad habang rosaryo’y hawak
Gunita’y lumipad habang likod’y dumaranak
Naalala ko pa no'y si Inang ingat na ingat sa isang batang mataba,
Matabang pitakang puno ng libo-libong kwarta
Sahod nilang mag-asawa na sa akin lang ginagasta
Para sa tuition ko, para sa pagkain, pamasahe't libro
O inang minamahal ako nang labis
Kung ang buwaya pa kayang tumatangis
Di maantig sa iyo’t tumalilis?
Sa pagligo sa likod ay laging may langis
Langis ng niyog na kinayod ng ‘yong nginig at mapupula nang kamay
Kung sa gabi’y rinig na rinig ko ang iyong pusong lukso nang lukso
Sa ilalim ng kulambong dinusta na ng panahon
Di mo magawang umalis kung dapuan ako ng sipon
Mga lamok na dumadapo di ligtas sa kanyang paglilitis
Sa loob ng tahanan di makitaan itlog ng ipis

Ako ang pasakit ng aba ninyong buhay
Pakiusap, pilitin **** lumakad parin gamit ang 'yong saklay
Hintayin **** mabigyan rin kita ng magandang buhay
Kung pagiging matiwasay ay dahil sa pagkakawalay
Tila di narin kaya ng loob kong patpatin
Sa ideya lamang nito’y tiyak na lalagnatin
O inay! Patawad kung pagod nang tumaas-baba pa aking baga
O Lubid sa inaanay na dingding  na tinitingala
Sa halip ng makikinang at mala diyamanteng mga tala
Huwag mo akong paglawayin sa iyong panlilinlang
Di magagawang sakupin ng depresyon ang tino kong nawawala
Ni ihulog ako nang tuluyan sa mahabaging grasya
Dahil kung sa pag buhos ng kamalasan ay patakan ang huling pasensya
Sa baha na isang pagtaas na lamang ay lulunurin na
At saka lamang ako sa huli'y makakahinga

Isa na akong kawalan na nilagyan ng katawan
Saksakin man, wala na akong maramdaman
Walang kikirot na laman
Walang dugong dadaloy nang luhaan
Sundalong natuyot na ng labanan
Binalot na ng kahihiyan at pagtataka kung mayroon ba akong kakayahan?
Biningi na nga ako ng mga sigaw sa aking isipan

Mas dukha pa akong di makakita pa ng liwanag
Liwanag na sa Bilibid natitikaman miski mga nag-aagawan
May hangin ngunit ako lang ang nalulunod
May dagat at ako lang ang di makalangoy
Mas preso pa akong walang makain nang di hamak
Mata kong bagsak at pula na, tighiyawat na parang sunog at di na maapula
Kakapalan lang ang ipakita ang mukha sa labas
Dahil kailan ba ang mundo'y naging patas sa batas?
Batas ng pag-iral ng matibay na loob
Ito na ang mga taong noo'y tinawag kong ungas
Bumubuhay na ng pamilya't may pambili na ng bigas

Sa loob ng maliit na kwadro
Sapat ang isang upua't mesa at isang kabayo
Sabit pati ang yabang kong diploma sa taas ng orocan
Lukot na resumé sa aking harapan nagmuka nang basahan
Mas tanggap pa sa trabahong pamunas ng puwitan
Ngunit mas higit pa ba ang munting papel kung nasaan aking larawan?
Bakas ng ilang buwang puyat at thesis na pinaghirapan
Salamin ng ninakaw na kabataan, ng inuman at kasiyahan
Repleksyon ng mga desisyong sa nakaraa'y napagpasiyahan

Bakit ako tatanggap ng trabahong mababa pa sa aking kakayahan
Bakit call center lang ang aking babagsakan?
O maging alila sa mga sinliit rin nila ang pinag-aralan?
Piso lang ba  halaga ng lahat ng aking pagsisikap?
Ito ba ang direksyon ng matamis na buhay na sa huli'y inalat?
Madali pa pala ang unibersidad
May kalayaan, oo tao'y mga mulat
Marami umano  ang buhok ng oportunidad
Hatakin man ay nasa harap ang bagsak

Kahapon itlog at pancit canton,
Dala ni nanay noon pang huling dalaw sa aking kahon
Inakalang sa tren isa akong bagon
Sa bilis ng oras ay papadayon
Isang buwan nang matapos na ako
Inakalang ito na ang hudyat ng aking pag ahon
Totoong mundong ganito pala ang paghamak at paghamon
Interbyu sa opisinang may pagka-amoy baygon
Ugali sa trabaho’y ako raw ay patapon
Kaklase sa hayskul aking nakasalubong
Nagsimula sa wala, ngayo’y umuusbong
Eh ilang beses ba ‘yong umulit ng ikatlong taon?!
Di maatim ng sikmura sila'y yumayabong
Habang ako rito sa kumot ay nakatalukbong

Hawak ko ang kwintas na mistulang ahas sa aking leeg
Nawalang pag-asa ng bayang tinakasan
Sasablay ako hanggang sa huling sandali
Kagitingan at kagalingan ang aking pasan pasan
Taas ang kamao habang dama ang gasgas ng tali sa aking lalamunan
Hinding hindi ninyo ako magiging utusan

Ito na ang mga huling salita sa aking talaarawan
Sinimulan kong isulat nang matapakan bukana ng Diliman
Bitbit ang banig at walang pag-alinlangan sa kinabukasan
Tilapiang pinilit sumagupa sa tubig-alat
Hinayaang lamunin ng mga pating na nagkalat
Nag-iisang makakaalis sa aming bayan
Dukhang nakita ang yaman ng Kamaynilaan
Dustang panliliit ang aking naging kalaban
Gabi-gabing basa aking banig sa malamig na sahig
Paulit-ulit sa aking pandinig ang salitang isang kahig!
Sa huli'y ano bang idinayo ko sa pamantasan?
Oo! Oo! Kaaalaman at pag-ahon sa kahirapan
Sa agendang ito ako pala ay tumaliwas
Sa mumurahin ako’y umiwas
Anupa’t sa aking kabataan, naging mapangahas
Ginamit nang ginamit pag-iisip kong nawalan na ng lakas
Sumama sa lahat ng lakara’t laging nasa labas
Tinapos agad-agad mabalanse lang ang lahat
Gabi-gabing sunog kilay pati balat
Waldas dito waldas doon, yan lang ang katapat
Sa huli’y doon na nga natapos ang lahat

Singsing ng pangako sa kanya,
Sa pamantasang sinisinta
Sa kahirapan di niya ako makikita
Bayang yayapusin mala linta

Ako raw ang pag-asa, isang iskolar ng bayang nais maglingkod sa bayan
Oo, naghikaos ang pamilya makalusot lang
Taas ng pinag-aralan, kung sa ibang bayan, sahod lang ng bayaran?
Mamamatay akong may dangal at pagmamataas sa aking kinatatayuan
Tatalon sa bangko't idududyan sariling katawan
Inyo na ang thirteenth month pay ninyong tinamuran!
Patawad sa bayan kong di na mapaglilingkuran!
Paalam sa bayang di pa rin alam ang kahulugan ng kalayaan!

"Let us have love and more love, a love that melts all opposition, a love that conquers all foes, a love that sweeps away all barriers, a love that aboundeth in charity, large-heartedness, tolerance, and noble-striving, a love that triumphs over all obstacles, a boundless, resistless, sweeping love. Ah me!

Each one must be a sign of love, a sea of love, a centre of love, a sun of love, a star of love, a haven of love, a pearl of love, a palace of love, a mountain of love, a world of love, a universe of love.

Hast thou love? Then thy power is irresistible.

Hast thou sympathy? Then all the stars will sing thy praise!"

~ 'Abdu'l-Baha, Star of the West, VII:17, 19 January 1917, page 171

Reflection is an object just like an atom or a wall.
When this object reflects nothing, there is no object at all.
Nothing is so disgraceful for a writer, except to hearken to its call.
No life is there save by this word, a letter, or a number even.
Only appreciated when the song birds sleep.
During the day I replace it with something, so that I may reflect some object.
For "nothing" is as sleep except for one still awake at 5 AM.
Coked up you could say on dark chocolate, green tea, and nutmeg.
Spaces held together by cigarette puffs.
Waiting for sunrise for another day of the Baha'i Fast to begin.
Hollow is how I feel from concentrating on vipassana alone.
But what is peace if there is no knowledge?
"No knowledge, no peace," there I've said it.
Already missing the winter, though I dreaded it.
Or is it "Know knowledge, know peace," I play with it?
So here I hold the philosopher's stone.
In a month I'll question if I really did.
This thing, a thing it is, though it is a chameleon of sorts.
The trick is to never make small talk with myself.
Though at this a seasoned person would balk.
What is left but a heart beat and a nerve?
A silence that will soon be warmed.
Oh yes, at a new day I must restate what has proved the tests of time: what is consciousness?
I think what they really are asking is what gives humanity our level of abstraction.
Why it's been proven: our large brain compared to our body's size.
Why must consciousness be a surprise?
DNA that formed from the elements: is this a more abstract conclusion?
Or, should it be found in a vaccuum: where no one can socialize, so only one team of scientists can win the prize?
Is it in God, to which I say a Prophet has said we will never ever know.
Within reason, to know God, our DNA would have to further differentiate.
By this, I mean, these mutations is what we are after.
To evolve, could this be consciousness' answer?
Without sleep, no meat (for a year), what other memories could rhyme: deer?
Rabbits and squirrels, mosquitos and trees all sleep, but please: I'm on a numbered clock not a clock of the sun.
Remember when the Braves won?
Remember when the pool was no sport, but fun?
There I go in frivolous pastimes.
Insight, insight, insight, my superego clamps down.
Produce a pearl for Hello Poetry to muse.
Although sometimes these poems I think confuse.
Humanity's joy shut down by a virus.
But an introvert's paradise, what consolation.
To the news half of the ears surmise.
Why is the news about dollar signs?
Capitalism is the Holy Ghost of some.
Give all my money to the Church and Republicans.
Tell us "only Jesus" when only half your gospel you follow.
Tell me Jesus is love when you think hell is beneath.
What grief!
Have you ever heard of the sweet sparrow of Baha?
Calling all peoples leaves of one tree?
Saying every person is equal, no more righteous, nor exalted?
Setting the hearts of the followers of all religions on fire?
They all are One, we say.
You practice yours, I'll practice mine, but never say "hell" to one another, and you'll find:
a better Earth, hearts of heaven too.
A better neighborhood for me and you.
*
But I know some have searched the hearts of Baha, only to find we're "one wayers".
If you cannot find the mercy in us, we're happy for you to join another religion too.
Thanks for inquiring, and if Baha rings so true, but find it's not practiced right, then Baha has said truly no religion is right, no religion is true.

baha
bagyo
ulan
init

noong walang naniwala sayo
nandoon ako
sa tabi mo
at ngayon
na ramdam ang pait ng mundo
wag mo sanang kalimutan
ang mga paalalang binanggit noon sayo
at ako lamang ang naniwala sayo

1.
Noong unang panahon, pulos patag ang lupa
Maliban sa bundok na dalawa
Bundok Kalawitan sa Kanluran
At Bundok Amuyaw sa Silangan!
(Once upn a time, all of the earth were plains
Except for two mountains
Mt. Kalawitan on the West
And Mt. Amuyaw on the East!)

2.
Ang kalikasan ay sagana
Ang mga tao ay payapa
(Nature was then bountiful
People were then peaceful)

3.
Ngunit dumating ang isang delubyo
Nagkandamatay ang lahat ng mga tao
(But a deluge arrived
All people died)

4.
Maliban sa magkapatid na dalawa
Sa bundok napadpad ang bawat isa
(Except for two siblings
Each of them landed on the mountains)

5.
Sa Amuyaw na kabundukan
Ang lalaki na si Wigan
(On Amuyaw mount
There was the man named Wigan)

6.
Sa Kalawitan na kabundukan
Ang babae na si Bugan
(On Kalawitan mount
There was the woman named Bugan)

7.
Nang humupa ang baha
Nagtagpo silang dalawa
(When the flood subsided
The two of them united)

8.
Subalit isang araw, nakadama si Bugan
Na may buhay sa kanyang sinapupunan
(Yet one day, Bugan felt something
In her womb, someone was living)

9.
Siya’y nagimbal sa natuklasan
Nagtangkang magpakamatay si Inang Bugan
(Upon her discovery, she was horrified
Mother Bugan tried to commit suicide)

10.
Sa dali-dali’y biglang nagpakita
Si Makanungan na bathala
(Soon, there suddenly appeared someone
He is a god named Makanungan)

11.
Kanyang pinigilan si Bugan
Dahil ganap niya itong nauunawaan
(He tried to stop Bugan
Because he could fully understand)

12.
Sila ay pinayagan ng diyos na magsama
Sapagkat sa mundo’y wala nang taong iba
(They were allowed to become a couple
Because in the world, there were no more people)

13.
Ang magkapatid na mag-asawa
Marami ang naging bunga
(The couple siblings
Got many offsprings)

14.
Apat na babae
(Four females)
At lima ay lalaki
(And five males)

15.
Sa kahuli-hulihan
Sila-sila rin ang nag-asawahan
(And soon after
They married one another)

16.
Subalit may natatangi sa kanila
Ang lalaking si Igon na walang asawa
(But there’s someone unique among them
He’s the man, Igon, who got no tandem)

17.
Isang araw, dumating ang ayaw ng lahat
Ito ang panahon ng tagsalat
(One day, there arrived something everyone didn’t like
The season of famine did strike)

18.
Kaya upang suyuin ang mga diyos
Ritwal ng pag-aalay kanilang idinaos
(So in order that the gods could be pleased
They rendered a ritual burnt offering of beasts)

19.
Nang sa alay kinapos na sila
Kanilang inihandog maliit na daga
(And when of sacrificial beasts they were out
They only offered just a small rat)

20.
Sa kabila ng lahat, walang paring tugon
Kaya isang krimen ang naging opsyon
(After all, there answered no voice
So it was crime that became the choice)

21.
Walang pakundangang kinitilan ng buhay
Kapatid na si Igon ang ipinang-alay
(They dared to **** their brother
It was Igon whom they did offer)

22.
At biglang nagpakita
Si Makanungan na bathala
(And suddenly, there appeared someone
It was the god, Makanungan)

23.
Lahat sila ay isinumpa
Iyon ang simula ng digmaan sa lupa!
He cursed everyone
That was the beginning of war in the land!)

-03/10/2012
(Dumarao)
*for Lit. Day 2012

Baha'u'llah is the Fire of Being kindled by the snow of
faith, whereas the Spirit is the eyewash of light
upon the prism of the heart.

Notice how Baha'u'llah's Fire of Being is lit in the
conscious mind and not the subconscious mind like the Spirit is.
The conscious mind is a mind without concern for
past or future. It knows no rank and holds no
station. It has no depth or height. It has no design and
holds no symbol.
It knows no support.
It is a mark of crimson. It holds no eloquent speaker, except the inspiration of the heart, and Baha'u'llah Himself.
It knows no plan except 'Abdu'l-Baha's Divine Plan, it has
no mortal guide except Shoghi Effendi's letters.
It carries out the devotion shown to it.
Devotion here is one thing done at a time, and cannot be
sustained except with great desire.
There is no room for impressing someone.
It hath no wisdom save what is stored in the heart.
It sees the world as a child, 100% hope.
Its energy is the ignorance of purity.
Its captain is the invoker of His Word.
It is stoked at the fire of responsibility.
It is drowned by the remembrance of aught except Him.

Paalam bayan kong sinilangan,
sintang katagalugan, lupain na sinakop
ng mga puting dayuhan; inalipin at binusabos
ng higit sa tatlong-daan na taon.

Kung hindi sana ako nakagapos
ay nasa larangan ako ngayon,
nakikipaglaban para sa iyong kalayaan;
subalit ako ay binihag ng mga taksil na kalahi,
kayumanggi ang kulay ng kanilang balat
subalit ugaling Kastila sila.

Alam ko na ito na ang aking wakas
dadalhin nila ako at si Procopio sa dako na di namin alam;
tanging diyos lang ang nakababatid sa aming sasapitin.
Sa punglo kaya o sa talim ng tabak kaming magkapatid ay masasawi?

Nalulumbay ako hindi dahil sa ako'y mauutas
kundi sa pag-aakala na masasawi ako sa kamay ng aking kalahi.
Kung dayuhan man lang sana ang sa akin ay papaslang mas matatanggap ko ito nang maluwag sa dibdib.

Paalam mahal kong Oryang,
Lakambini ng Katipunan,
ina ng aking anak at kabiyak ng aking dibdib.
Naiiyak ako sapagkat malungkot ang naging wakas ng ating pagsinta.

Kung magtagumpay ang himagsikan
at makamtan na ang layang inaasam
wag sana makalimutan ang mga nabuwal sa parang ng digma.

Kainin nawa ng lupa ang mga taksil sa bayan,
lunurin ng baha ang mga nakipagtulungan sa kaaway,
tamaan ng kidlat ang mga tampalasan na umibig sa dayuhan na mapang-alipin. Sumpain sila ng langit.

Nakapiring ang aking mga mata subalit nararamdaman ko na malapit na kami sa dako kong saan babasahin sa amin ni Komandante Lazaro Makapagal ang hatol ng konseho ng digma.

Payapa ang aking kalooban, walang pangamba.
Alam ko na ginawa ko ang nararapat, kailanman hindi ako nagtaksil gaya ng kanilang ipinaparatang.
Mabuhay ang Pilipinas, Mabuhay ang Rebolusyon.

Is mystery dependent on me thinking of mystery?
It is a safe bet.
For when what is central is knowledge, then I can only become aware of mystery if upon something new or unknown.
Thus, mystery is not knowledge, but the lack of it.
Mystery is ignorance.
Thus, my meditation is rather reflection on ignorance,
As if I'm trying to better describe ignorance, or find a way out of ignorance with only the experiential.
I think of mostly consciousness and the universe here, in terms of my and humanity's ignorance of them.
Not only am I limited by my own understanding but also the understanding of others, however much they are even more intelligent than me.
I see others working on problems that have proven to not solve the mystery, the mystery being ignorance.
The only thing that could solve it is omniscience.
Then it follows that what I'm really trying to solve is omniscience.
"Infinite cognition" as the Buddha put it.
Even if a person could have omniscience, it would be colored by how they can make sense of reality.
Knowledge would take the form of what is most familiar.
Thus, when wondering about a question as to what is pi, they may say about 3.14.
The answer conditioned on how people and the omniscient one would have the capacity to hear.
Maybe this seems more like intuition.
But omniscience would denote the person as a speaker, yet only allowable to speak as what was conducive for everyone's best.
This is how Baha'is look at Manifestations of God: only allowed to share a certain amount at a time.
Just as the Son said "I have many things to share with you, but you cannot hear them now".
Still their capacity would be limited to what they themselves were interested in.
For one who is marginalized and oppressed or even thronged by multitudes, often has no willingness to delve deeply into subject matter, it causing some to stray from a correct path.
Since fractal systems work strongest in more diverse settings, it would seem that the very thing that makes it strong also makes its capacity to hear weak.
Omniscience therefore, if given to only a few, has a limited range of effect.
But even this limited range would change the entire system.
As Baha'u'llah calls His followers "the leaven" and the Son calls His followers "the salt".
"Many are called but few are chosen" seems derogatory in a world where "ye are all the leaves of one tree".

World consciousness almost arose to love tonight, but the lover ensared it in his anger once again.
If I close my ears to them, will it go away?
If they close my ears to me, will I go away?
Strength in the diversity of parts.
Strength really meaning pain.
E Pluribus Unum.

Uy, gawa tayo ng tula
Kasi putang ina ng Maynila
Sa nayon ay dinadakila
Isang abot-kamay na tala

Kailan ka ba kakawala
Sa anino ng Maynila?
Umambon ay may baha
Selpon ay may kukuha

Walang pawis at luha
Walang ngiti ni tuwa
Kwartang pulos kaltas
Walang pambili ng bigas

Kapit kahit mapurol
Mga bundok ay gagawing burol
Nakakita ka na ba ng ulol?
Sa Maynila marami niyan,
buhol-buhol

Kung saan walang permanente
Maging sa suplay ng kuryente
Ang pamahalaan ang hinete
Tagasulsol naman ang gabinete

Kapatiran may kaputol
Basta't kumapit mala kuhol
May nakahihigit sa batas
Umangal ka at ika'y utas

Wala nang lunas
Wag ka nang lumuwas
Utang na loob kaibigan
Maawa ka sa iyong ksasadlakan

What can I say that I've broken the Baha'i Fast so that I won't be overly anxious on a busy day at the restaurant?
Using my arms and back to wash dishes.
Tactile placement of the feet around co-workers.
Remembering every detail needed for deliveries.
Baha'u'llah has exempted heavy labor from the Fast.
I couldn't do my work without constant water and a store of calories.
But what of smoking on work days?
What would God think?
The fact that I'm overly anxious at work without them has made me know how addicted I am.
So anxious as to question whether I should quit work.
"Don't do that to me again," my body tells itself, "last night was too much anxiety to simply be without smokes."
I suppose my soul will go to a tier of the afterlife where people are addicted to cigarettes.

0118

Hindi Ka lumipas —
Naalala ko noong nakaraang taon
Ilang araw buhat sa ngayong pagbibilang ko
Bago pa sumulyap ang mga pampakulay sa kalangitan
Para magtagisan sa pagbungad sa paunang ngayon.

Hindi Ka lumipas —
Halos itim na lamang ang kulay sa kalangitan
Na para bang ang pag-asa ay kinitil na ng sanlibutan
Na para bang ito’y nobelang pawang paghihintay na lamang
At nang subukang gapangin ng putik ang pangarap ngunit hindi —
Hindi Ka pa rin lumipas
At muli **** binigkas na Ikaw ang dahilan ng lahat
Na ang lahat ay walang kabuluhan
Kung ang Ikaw ay ibabaon sa limot at tatalikuran.

Hindi Ka lumipas —
Gaya ng mga butil ng luha sa aking mga mata
Na ang pagsusumamo ay tila araw-araw na pag-aakyat ng ligaw Sayo
Na maging ang umaga ay tila Simbang Gabi.

Hindi Ka lumipas —
Nang dungisan ng mundo ang mensaheng laan Mo
Ngunit sabi Mo’y tapos na ang lahat
Malambot pa sa bulak ang sumalo sa bawat pagkabagsak
Walang katulad ang Iyong mga yakap,
At heto ako — mas natutong sumandal sa nag-iisang Ikaw.

———

Hindi Ka lumipas —
Ilang beses **** hinayaang masaksihan ko ang pagsagwan nila sa agos
Ang paglipad sa ere na tanging Ikaw lamang  ang sumalo
Na para bang ito na ang huling mga katagang bibitiwan ko —
Ayoko na
Pero hindi —
Pagkat nagkakamali ang dilim sa paghasik ng kanyang sarili
Pagkat ang Liwanag ay panghabambuhay
At hindi tayo kakapusin sa oras
At hindi ito isang “sandali lang.”

Hindi Ka lumipas —
At ayokong palipasin ang kahit isang pintig ng sinasabi nilang “sandali lang naman”
Pagkat sa oras na ito’y hindi Ka lilipas —
At tanging ang pangalan Mo ang mangingibabaw
Sa susunod pang hihiranging mga araw
Kahit pa sabihin nilang nagbago na ang lahat.

Hindi Ka lilipas —
Kahit pa tabunan ng pangungutya ang Iyong kasulatan,
Tanging Ikaw ang magiging bukambibig.
Kahit pa hindi makakita ang mga bulag
Ay ipagdidiinan pa ring Ikaw ang magbubukas ng bawat paningin
At walang dilim na kayang sakupin ang Bayan Mo, Ama.

Hindi Ka lilipas —
At sa bawat pagtaas ng Bandila
Ay Ikaw ang mananatiling may tiyak na katuturan
Na ang mensahe Mo’y ipangangalandakan
Saanmang dako at sulok ng mga Islang hinati ngunit Iyong ipinag-isa.

Hindi Ka lilipas —
Tulad ng mga ulap tuwing ang ulan ay titila
Tulad ng tubig tuwing huhupa ang baha
Tulad ng ilaw at init ng kandilang inapula.

Hindi Ka lumilipas —
Gaya noon, hanggang sa huling hampas ng segundo sa huling pagyukod ng araw.
Maghari Ka —
Hanggang sa huling pagkurap na kasama Ka.

Handa na  ipagtanggol katumbas man itong sampung buhay
Ang halaga'y higit pa sa inipon na mga koral sa karagatan
Kung binastos kahit malinggit ay
kikibo ang nanahimik na balasik

Hinintay humulaw ang bagyo at si Dessa ay sumakay bago umuwi ng bahay
Lumusong sa baha sa baryo
at ginunam-gunam ang sandaling yaon

Kung may oras sa pag-aaral
gayun din sa paglilibang
Ngunit ang kunting kalayawan ay naging hadlang upang makatanggap
ng medalya ng karunungan

Hindi bakal at kawad ang pag-iisiip
para di matukso sa mga bisyo
Sa pagsusugal ay nalulong
Hindi mahilig sa anumang  pampalakasang laro
Napasama sa kapatiran

Dumating ang mga araw ang alingawngaw ay umabot sa ama
Nagpakalasing noong gabi bago naglabas ng mga hinaing
Mga salita niya'y matutulis, umuulos sa laman

Sa wakas! Nariyan na ang matagal Kong hinintay
Sa mahabang panahon, mailalabas ko na ang tinatago Kong lumbay
Dumating na ang bagay na aking pinaghandaan
At yun ay ang pagbuhos ng maganda at malakas na ulan
Oo Alam Kong ****** kung pakikinggan
Pero epektibong pampagaan ng bigat kong nararamdaman
Nakatutuwa kasing pagmasdan ang nag uunahang patak nito sa lupa
Animo'y naghaharuta't naghahabulang mga bata
Maganda rin ditong isabay ang pagpatak ng mga luha
Pagkat sa ilalim nito, walang makakakita
Masayang pakinggan ang musikang gawa ng ulan
Na nagbibigay sa puso ko ng konting kapayapaan.
Ng konting katahimikan.
Ngunit sa paglisan ng bagay na minsang nagbigay sayo ng saya,
Kaakibat din ang epektong sadyang nakapangangamba
Pagkat sa pagtatapos ng ulan ay may baha
Sa pag alis ng mahal mo nama'y mayroong mga luha
Kung paanong sa bagyo ang bahay ay nasisira
At sa paghampas ng hangin, ang mga puno'y nagwawala
Ganoon din ang puso mo, ngunit wala kang magawa
Pagkat siya ang bumitaw sa higpit ng iyong kapit
Siya ang umayaw sa pilit **** paglapit
Siya ang sumuko sa pagmamahal ng tapat
Samantalang ikaw handa pa ring patawarin ang lahat.
Katangahan.
Yan ang pinairal mo sa matagal na panahon
Yan pa rin ba hanggang ngayon?
Imulat mo ang iyong mata
Sa pagpapanggap nila,huwag kang padadala.

Anong silbi ng luha?
Kung papatak lang ito gaya ng ulan,
At gaya ng baha'y pagtatampisawan.

May iilang paslit sa Kalye ni Juan,
Nagbabangka-bangkaan
Paglaki nila'y dal'wa ang sinasagwanan.

Doon sa iskinitang panay basura ang laman,
Bisita nila'y araw-araw na kagutuman.
Iwinawagayway ang sarili,
Bentahan pala'y kanilang pagkakakilanlan.

Minsa'y nasaglit ako sa tindahan
Nang may matiyagang nakipag-usigan
Banta niya'y bubuwagin ang buhay
Ang latay ng bukas ay aangkinin nang ngayon
Titila rin daw ang buhos ng ulan,
Pang-lamang tiyan lang daw,
Bagkus dahas ang kikitil sa kasaganaan.

Ganoon na nga,
May mga nauudlot na kinabukasan
Pati istoryang panay nagtititigan.

Ngayon kasi'y
Pakalat-kalat na lang,
Iba na pati takbo ng isip,
Nakikilimos na lang
Baka may singkong duling man lang.

Sa sulating papel,
ilang letra ang nailimbag
para lantaran maipahayag na ang pagdarahop sa alpabeto ay ang masamang salagimsim na pasanin

Mapait ang sasapitin sa guhit ng palad
Makulimlim na hudyat ng kaharian
Sa malas na katalagahan
Ang pangawan na nag-alingayngay
Nagtitiis nang pagkahimay-himay

Mahabang kadena na nakakabit
Sa dantaon na nagnobena sa templo
Ang naisaulo lang sa gilid ay ang iba't-ibang kapintasan
na nagkadikit-dikit at nagtatanikala

Natumba sa kaskaho ang nanlambot na tuhod
Ito'y naging karanasan ng pilay
Ginamit ang tungkod ng katatagan
nang maayos na kumandirit sa daan

Karamdamang na di maibsan
Ang pagtitimpi ay sadyang kahinaan
Tila'y sakitin na sisiw nagtatampisaw sa baha na sa inahin nakahanap ng pagkalinga

naglalaro ang maliliit na alon
sa batuhan
kasabay ay paulit-ulit na pagtalbog
sa kalagitnaan
tinatangay ng mapagbirong hangin
hanggang sa ulap
lumilikha ng kislap at palakpak
naroon lang
ang unos
ang kinatatakutang delubyo
sigwa
pinagsamang ingay at katahimikan
magkatipan
bawat isa ay nagkakaisa
paikot
pabulusok
ang mababangis na luha
kanyang dinadala
kasunod ay payapang umaga

O to be prejudice between the visible
and invisible Baha'u'llah.
When moving out of nature becomes moving by the Will.
Therefore, divinity becomes a shuffling of
the attention away from all things, words, senses,
forms, and starts to receive instructions from
the personages that visit me.
She stared at me as if I was the sole
expression of her day,
tossed the blouse covering her beauty.
Her waist was perfect and made
mine perfect while sitting.
She caught sight of Baha'u'llah,
and her spirit dispersed.
Angels of Prophets parted ways,
by means of Names.
He unfolds a general saying
to tell me of His hidden power.
That woman, Rey, of the Force
looks at me with tears in her eyes.
Baha'u'llah always leaves me
to have no sign or description
of the divine.
He came and left, and though seen and felt, left no remaining
evidence
of His
Self.

Kathang-isip na nagsimula ng paglalakbay.
Bawat pahina ng buha'y hinubog ng sabay.
Ika'y anghel, bumababa, at sinagip
ang mundo kong pariwara
Ipangako na hindi ka mawawala

Lahat ng salitang binitawan
Na walang makikilalang sinoman
Na magbabago ng nilalaman
Ng aking puso at isipan

Pero andito na tayo
Hinarap ang mga bagyo
Lindol, baha, at delubyo
Andito pa rin tayo

Hawak, mahal...
Humawak ka't tayo'y maglalakbay
Hawak, mahal...
Patungo sa habambuhay

Pero andito na tayo
Hinarap ang mga bagyo
Lindol, baha, at delubyo
Andito pa rin tayo

Hawak, mahal...
Humawak ka't tayo'y maglalakbay
Hawak, mahal...
Patungo sa habambuhay

Hawak, mahal...
Humawak ka't tayo'y maglalakbay
Hawak, mahal...
Patungo sa habambuhay

"Someone at school was bullying me."
Well Baha'u'llah says that God loves the sighs of the oppressed more than anything else.
"Why?"
Because it means we are being kind and not trying to take an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.
Rather we forgive and suffer through oppression.
Thus, God will vindicate us either in this world or the next.
For Baha'u'llah also said that the paradise for the patient is the only paradise without limitation.
Thus, we sigh, we wait, we suffer.

‘Abá Cloak or mantle; a rough, coarse shirt.[1][2]
Ábádih
‘Abbás AR: عباس lion
‘Abdu’l-Bahá AR: عباس افندی Servant of Glory Title of ‘Abbás Effendi, the eldest son and successor of Bahá'u'lláh, meaning Servant of Bahá (Glory), i.e., Servant of Bahá'u'lláh. He preferred this title over others because it emphasized His servitude to Bahá'u'lláh.
‘Abdu’l-Hamid AR:  عبد الحميد servant of the All-Laudable
‘Abdu’l-Husayn AR:  عبد الحسين servant of Husayn
‘Abdu’lláh AR: عبد الله servant of God
Abhá AR: أبهى Most Glorious, All-Glorious A superlative form of the word Bahá’, "glory", or "glorious"; a form of the Greatest Name of God.
Abhá Beauty AR: جمال ابها A title of Bahá'u'lláh. See also Blessed Beauty.
Abhá Kingdom Most Glorious Kingdom The next stage of existence, or "the next world", i.e. the world of the afterlife.
Abjad system A numerological system, i.e. a system assigning a numerical value to letters, which creates a new layer of meaning in Scripture. For instance, the value of the word Bahá’ in the Abjad system is nine, lending that number a special significance.
Abu’l-Faḍl AR:  ابوالفضل father of virtue
‘Adasíyyih A village near the Jordan River where some early Baha'is lived, working as farmers at ‘Abdu’l-Bahá's request.
Adhan AR: أَذَان announcement[3] Also Azán. Muslim call to prayer.[2]
Ádhirbáyján FA: آذربایجان Also Azerbaijan. A region in northwestern Iran.[4]
Afnán AR: ﺍﻓﻨﺎﻥ twigs The maternal relatives of the Báb; used as a surname by their descendants.
Aghsán AR: ﺍﻏﺼﺎﻥ branches The male descendants of Bahá'u'lláh; has particular implications not only for the disposition of endowments but also for the succession of authority following the passing of Bahá’u’lláh and of his son ‘Abdu’l-Bahá.
A.H. After Hijirah. Date of Muḥammad’s migration from Mecca to Medina, and basis of Islamic chronology.[2]
‘Ahd
Aḥmad AR: أحمد to thank, to praise An Arabic given name from the same root as the name Muhammad.
Aḥsá’í AR: أحسائي from Ahsáʼ An Arabic demonym referring to a native of the Ahsáʼ region in eastern Saudi Arabia.
Ahváz FA: اهواز the Khuzi people A region in southwestern Iran.
‘Akká AR: عكّا A penal colony of the Ottoman Empire (now part of northern Israel) to which Bahá'u'lláh was banished by Sultan 'Abdu'l-'Aziz.
Akbar AR: اكبر great Great, or greater. See Alláh-u-Akbar, Ghusn-i-Akbar.[2]
‘Alá’ AR: علاء loftiness The nineteenth month of the Bahá’í calendar; the month of fasting.
Alí
Alláh-u-Abhá AR: الله أبهى God is Most Glorious A form of the Greatest Name of God. Commonly used as a greeting by Bahá'ís. Repeating Alláh-u-Abhá 95 times a day is a law binding on all Bahá'ís, as written by Bahá'u'lláh in the Kitáb-i-Aqdas.
Alláh-u-Akbar AR: ٱللَّٰهُ أَكْبَرُ God is Most Great
Alváh
Alváḥ-i-Saláṭín
Amatu'l-Bahá AR: امةالبهاء Maidservant of Glory Title of Rúhíyyih Khanum, the wife of Shoghi Effendi, meaning Maidservant of Bahá (Glory), i.e., Maidservant of Bahá'u'lláh.
Amín
Amír lord, prince, commander, governor[2] Also Ameer, Emir. The word originally signified a military commander, but very early came to be extended to anyone bearing rule.[5]
Amru’lláh
Anzalí
Áqá FA: آقا Sir, mister, master Also Aga, Agha. A dignitary or lord; used generally as a term of respect.[6] Title given by Bahá’u’lláh to ‘Abdu’l-Bahá (translated as "Master").[2]
Aqdas FA: اقدس‎ most holy Most Holy. Used in the title of the Kitáb-i-Aqdas.
‘Arabistán A former Arab Emirate that now forms part of the Iranian province of Khuzestan.
Aṣl-i-Kullu'l-Khayr AR: أﺻﻞ ﻛﻞ ﺍﻟﺨﻴﺮ words of wisdom A tablet of Bahá’u’lláh published in Tablets of Bahá’u’lláh.
Asmá’ AR: اسماء names The ninth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
‘Avájiq FA: آواجیق The westernmost city in Iran, located in the province of West Ádhirbáyján.
Ayádí
Áyah AR: آية verse, sign, miracle Also Ayat. A verse, esp. of the Qur'án.
Ayyám-i-Há AR:  ايام الهاء days of Há A period of four or five intercalary days in the Bahá’í calendar, celebrated by Bahá'ís as a Festival marked by charity, hospitality and rejoicing.
Azal
‘Aẓam AR: اعظم greatest[2] See Ghusn-i-‘Aẓam.
‘Aẓamat AR: عظمة grandeur The fourth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
‘Azíz
B
Term Source Meaning Definition
Báb, The AR: باب door, gate Title assumed by Mírzá ‘Alí-Muḥammad after the declaration of His Mission as the promised Qá'im (or Mihdí/Mahdi) in Shíráz in May 1844.[2] A Manifestation of God whose dispensation preceded that of Bahá'u'lláh, and who foretold His coming. Founder of the Bábí religion.
Bábí AR: بابی of the gate A follower of the Báb, or an adjective used in relating something or someone to the Bábí religion.
Bábí religion The religion established by the Báb.
Bábu'l-Báb AR: باب الباب gate of the gate Title of Mullá Ḥusayn-i-Bushru'i, the first person to profess belief in the Báb.
Baghdád AR: مدينة بغداد bestowed by God[7] Also Bagdad.[8] The capital city of Iraq, to which Bahá’u’lláh was exiled in 1853. He took up residence and lived there for the greater part of a decade. His House in the Karkh sector of the city is a site of pilgrimage, although it was destroyed in 2013; a garden in the city's Rusafa sector was the site of the events celebrated during Riḍván.
Bahá’ AR: أبهى glory, splendour The Greatest Name of God, meaning "glory", or "glorious". The first month of the Bahá’í calendar. Title by which Bahá’u’lláh (Mírzá Ḥusayn-‘Alí) is designated.[2]
Bahá’í AR: بهائی of glory A follower of Bahá'u'lláh, or an adjective used in relating something or someone to the Bahá’í Faith. It is important to note that "Bahá’í" is not a noun meaning the religion as a whole; i.e. "She is a member of the Bahá'í Faith" rather than "She is a member of Bahá'í".
Bahá’í Faith The religion established by Bahá'u'lláh.
Bahá'u'lláh AR: بهاء الله Glory of God The Founder of the Bahá'í Faith, the Manifestation of God for this age.
Bahíyyih Bahíyyih Khánum, “Greatest Holy Leaf” (born Fáṭimih Sulṭán, 1846–15 July 1932)
Bahjí AR: البهجة delight A site outside the city of ‘Akká where Bahá'u'lláh spent His final years, in the Mansion of Bahjí.
Bait al-Adl AR: بيت العدل House of Justice Also Baytu’l-’Adl. The House of Justice, an elected legislative institution ordained by Bahá'u'lláh.
Bait al-Adl al-Azam AR: بيت العدل الأعظم House of Justice Also Baytu’l-’Adl-i-A’ẓam. The Universal House of Justice, also referred to as the Supreme House of Justice, the elected institution that currently serves as the head of the Bahá'í Faith.
Balúchistán FA: بلوچستان Southwestern province of Pakistan
Bandar-‘Abbás FA: بندرعباس A port city and capital of Hurmúzgán Province on the southern Persian Gulf coast of Írán
Baqíyyatu’lláh Remnant of God Title applied both to the Báb and to Bahá’u’lláh.[2]
Bárfurúsh FA: بارفروش a town in Mázindarán, now known as Bábul (Babol)
Bayán AR: بیان‎ exposition, utterance, explanation Title given by the Báb to His Revelation, particularly to His Books, and especially to two of His major works: The Persian Bayán and the Arabic Bayán.[2]
Bayt AR: بيت house, building
Big Honorary title; lower title than Khán.[2]
Bírjand FA: بیرجند city in eastern Írán
Bishárát AR: ﺍﻟﻄﺮﺍﺯﺍﺕ good news, glad-tidings A tablet of Bahá’u’lláh published in Tablets of Bahá’u’lláh.
Bukhárá FA: بخارا city in Uzbekistan
Burújird FA: بروجرد Capital city of the province of Luristán, place of the governorship of Mírzá Buzurg
Búshihr FA: بوشهر Iranian city (once the primary port of Írán) and province on the Persian Gulf.
Búshrúyih FA: بشرويه a town in Khurásán, 55 km NE of Ṭabas and 70 km WSW of Tún. It is the birthplace of Mullá Ḥusayn, first disciple of the Báb.
C
Term Source Meaning Definition
Caravanserai FA: کاروانسرای caravan palace An inn for caravans, i.e. groups of traders, pilgrims or other travellers, engaged in long-distance travel.[2][9]
Chihár-Vádí FA: چهار وادی four valleys “Four Valleys” by Bahá’u’lláh. Addressed to Shaykh ‘Abdu’r-Raḥmán-i-Karkútí.
Chihríq FA: چهریق Fortress in Kurdish Ádhirbáyján, designated by the Báb as Jabal-i-Shadíd (the Grievous Mountain)
D
Term Source Meaning Definition
Dárúghih FA: داروغه high constable[2]
Darvísh FA: درویش seeking doors; beggar Also Dervish. A Muslim mystic, often a hermit or ascetic who wanders the land carrying a begging bowl (kashkúl). Equivalent to the Arabic faqír.[10]
Dawlih state, government[2] See Vakilu'd-Dawlih.
E
Term Source Meaning Definition
Effendi FA: افندي master A title of nobility.
F
Term Source Meaning Definition
Fárán Pers. small village in Ardistán
Farmán FA: فرمان order, command, royal decree[2] Also Firmán. An edict given by a sovereign, particularly for decrees, grants, passports, etc.[11]
Farrásh FA: فرش footman, lictor, attendant[2]
Farrásh-Báshí FA: فراش باشی The head farrásh.[2]
Fárs FA: فارس a southern province of Írán, from which the name Persia derives.
Farsakh FA: فرسخ Unit of measurement. Its length differs in different parts of the country according to the nature of the ground, the local interpretation of the term being the distance which a laden mule will walk in the hour, which varies from three to four miles. Arabicised from the old Persian “parsang,” and supposed to be derived from pieces of stone (sang) placed on the roadside.[2][12]
Fiḍál AR: فضال grace The fourth day of the week in the Bahá’í calendar, corresponding to Tuesday.
G
Term Source Meaning Definition
Ganjih FA: گنجه (Ganjeh) city (2nd largest) in Ádharbayján. It was named Elisabethpol in the Russian Empire period.
Ghuṣn-i-A‘ẓám FA: غصن اعظم Most Great or Greatest Branch, i.e. ‘Abdu’l-Bahá.
Ghuṣn-i-Akbar FA: غصن اکبر Greater Branch, i.e. Mírzá Muḥammad-‘Ali. Also The Chosen Branch, i.e. Shoghi Effendi.
Gílán FA: گیلان a northern province of Írán on the Caspian Sea.
H
Term Source Meaning Definition
Ḥadíth AR: حديث occurring, happening, taking place
Ḥájí AR: حاج Also Hajji, Hadji. A Muslim who has made the Hajj, i.e. pilgrimage.[2][13]
Ḥajj AR: حج setting out Also Hadj. The Muslim rite of pilgrimage to the holy city of Mecca.[13]
Hamadán FA: همدان Hamadán city in Írán, 144 km NE Kirmánsháh. Originally Ecbatana of the ancient Medes.
Ḥaydar-‘Alí AR: حيدر علي noted early Bahá’í, born into Shaykhí family of Iṣfahán. Known as the “Angel of Carmel”.
Haykal AR: هيكل temple; large building, edifice
Himmat-Ábád FA: همت اباد city in Raḍawí Khurásán Ústán Province, Írán
Howdah AR: هودج A litter carried by a camel, mule, horse, or elephant for travelling purposes.[2]
Ḥusayn AR: الحسين (diminutive form of Haṣan “Good”) Name of the third Imám, Ḥusayn.
Huvaydar village north of the city Ba‘qúba, which is 60 km NE of Baghdád
I
Term Source Meaning Definition
Ibráhím AR: إِبْرَاهِيْمُ A given name referring to Abraham, Patriarch of the people of Israel.
‘Idál AR: عدال justice The fifth day of the week in the Bahá’í calendar, corresponding to Wednesday.
Íl clan[2]
‘Ilm AR: علم knowledge The twelfth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Imám AR: إمام leader A Muslim religious leader; specifically, the title of the twelve shí’ah successors of Muḥammad.[2]
Imám-Jum’ih FA: امام جمعه Friday leader The leading imám in a town or city; chief of the mullás, who recites the Friday prayer for the sovereign.[2]
Imám-Zádih FA: امامزاده The tomb or shrine of an imám; or, a descendant of an imám.[2]
Iqán AR: الإيقان certitude being sure, knowing for certain; certitude. Also refers to the book, the Kitáb-i-Íqán.
Irán FA: ایران Írán, the kingdom of Persia proper. Derives from the name Aryán ("of the Iranians"), the self-identifier used by ancient Iranian peoples.
‘Iráq-i-‘Ajam FA: عراقِ عجم Persian ‘Iráq. ‘Iráq between the 11th to 19th centuries consisted of two neighbouring regions: Arabic Iraq (‘Iráq-i ‘Arab) and Persian Iraq (‘Iráq-i ‘Ajam). Arabic Iraq = ancient Babylonia (now central-southern Iraq), and Persian Iraq = ancient Media (now central-western Iran). The two regions were separated by the Zagros Mountains.
Iṣfahán FA: اصفهان Persian city 340 km south of Ṭihrán.
‘Ishqábád FA: عشق آباد Ashkhabad/Ashgabat; capital of Turkmenistan, known as the “City of Love”. A strong Bahá'í community developed there in the time of ‘Abdu’l-Bahá.
Ishráqát AR: ﺍﻻﺷﺮﺍﻗﺎﺕ radiance; radiation, eradiation, emanation; illumination A tablet of Bahá’u’lláh published in Tablets of Bahá’u’lláh.
Ishtihárd a village 69 km SE of Qazvín and 54 km SW of Karaj
Islám AR: الاسلام submission, resignation, reconciliation (to the will of God in every age)
Ismá‘ílíyyih AR: الإسماعيلية Isma’ilism (Ismá‘ílí sect)—branch of Shí‘a Islám that followed the Imám succession through the eldest son.
Istarábád FA: أستاراباد See Astarábád: “City of Mules”, on south eastern Caspian Sea border of Írán. Since 1937 called Gúrgán (Gorgán).
Istijlál AR: استجلال majesty The sixth day of the week in the Bahá’í calendar, corresponding to Thursday.
Istiqlál AR: استقلال independence The seventh day of the week in the Bahá’í calendar, corresponding to Friday.
‘Izzat AR: عزة might The tenth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
J
Term Source Meaning Definition
Jalál AR: جلال glory The second month of the Bahá’í calendar. Also the first day of the Bahá'í week, corresponding to Saturday.
Jamál AR: جمال beauty The third month of the Bahá’í calendar. Also the second day of the Bahá'í week, corresponding to Sunday.
Jamál-i-Mubárak FA: جمال مبارک “The Blessed Beauty” Title used by some Bahá’ís for Bahá’u’lláh.
Jásb FA: جاسب rural district, Markazí Province, Írán
Jubbih AR: جبيه Also Jubba. A cloth cloak or upper coat.[2][12]
K
Term Source Meaning Definition
Ka‘bih AR: كَعْبَة cube Also Kaaba, Ka'ba, Kaabeh. An ancient shrine at Mecca; the most holy shrine of Islam, located at the center of Islam's most important mosque, the Masjid al-Haram.[2][14]
Kad-Khudá FA: کدخدا Chief of a ward or parish in a town; headman of a village.[2]
Kalantar FA: کلانتر mayor[2]
Kalím FA: کلیم one who discourses[2]
Kalimát AR: كلمات words The eighth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Kalímát-i-Firdawsíyyih AR: ﺍﻟﻜﻠﻤﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻔﺮﺩﻭﺳﻴﺔ words of paradise A tablet of Bahá’u’lláh published in Tablets of Bahá’u’lláh.
Kamál AR: كمال perfection The ninth month of the Bahá’í calendar. Also the third day of the Bahá'í week, corresponding to Monday.
Karand FA: کارند A village about 100 km SE of Ṭihrán.
Karbilá AR: كربلاء Also Karbala, Kerbela. A ****’ite holy city in ‘Iráq where the Imám Ḥusayn was murdered and buried, and where His Shrine is located.[15]
Karbilá’í AR: کربلایی A Muslim who has performed the pilgrimage to Karbilá.
Káshán FA: کاشان One of the oldest cities of Írán, located in north central Persia.[16]
Kawthar AR: ٱلكَوْثَر abundant, plentiful Name of a lake or river in Paradise that Muḥammad saw on his mystic night journey (Qur’án, surah 108).
Kázim AR: ٱلْكَاظِم “One who suppresses his passion or anger”. The title of the seventh Imám of the Shí‘ih.
Kirmán FA: کرمان capital city of Kirmán province, Írán
Kirmánsháh FA: کرمانشاه Province and city in western Írán.
Khán AR: خان caravanserai A roadside inn where travelers (caravaners) could rest and recover from their day's journey.[9]
Khán-i-'Avámid FA: خان آوامید The caravanserai in ‘Akká where Bahá'u'lláh used to receive guests, and later the site for a Bahá'í school.
Khanúm FA:  خانم lady, Madame, Mrs. An honorific title given to women of high social status.
Khurásán FA: خراسان sunrise; orient Province in the north-eastern part of Írán until 2004—replaced by North Khurásán, South Khurásán and Razavi (Raḍawí) Khurásán Provinces.
Khuy FA: خوی (Khoy) city in and the capital of Khoy County, West Azerbaijan Province, Írán
Kitáb AR: الكتاب book A book.
Kitáb-i-‘Ahd FA: کتاب عهدی Book of the Covenant Testament of Bahá’u’lláh, designated by Him as His “Most Great Tablet”
Kitáb-i-Aqdas FA: کتاب اقدس The Most Holy Book by Bahá’u’lláh, written in Arabic
Kitáb-i-Íqán FA: کتاب ایقان Book of Certitude by Bahá’u’lláh
Kull-i-Shay’ AR: كل شىء all things The 361-year supercycle of the Bahá’í calendar, which consists of 19 Váḥids.
Kurdistán FA: کوردستان Greater Kurdistan, a roughly defined geo-cultural historical region wherein the Kurdish people form a prominent majority population and Kurdish culture, languages and national identity have historically been based.
L
Term Source Meaning Definition
Láhíján FA: لاهیجان Caspian sea resort in and the capital of Láhíján County
Lár FA: لار city in province of Fárs
Lawḥ AR: ﻟﻮﺡ board, blackboard
Luristán FA: لرستان a province and an area in western Írán in the Zagros Mountains
M
Term Source Meaning Definition
Maḥbúbu’sh-Shuhadá’ AR­: محبوب الشهداء Beloved of Martyrs Mírzá Muḥammad-Ḥusayn. Brother of Mírzá Muḥammad-Ḥasan, both from Iṣfahán.
Maḥmúd AR: محمود praised, commendable, laudable, praiseworthy A common Arabic name; a form of the name Muḥammad.
Mákú FA: ماکو a city in the West Azerbaijan Province, Írán
Maláyir FA: ملایر city SSE of Ḥamdán, Írán
Maqám FA: مقام site, location
Marághih FA: مراغه city 75 km south of Tabriz, Ádhirbáyján
Marḥabá AR: مرحبا welcome, well done A customary expression of greeting or welcome.
Masá’il AR: مسائل questions The fifteenth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Mashhad FA: مشهد‎ place of assembly place where a martyr or hero died; religious shrine venerated by the people, especially the tomb of a saint
Mashíyyat AR: مشية will The eleventh month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Mashriqu’l-Adhkár AR: مشرق اﻻذكار Dawning-place of the praises, prayers, remembrances or mentions of God Title for a purpose-built Bahá’í House of Worship.
Mázindarán FA: مازندران A province in northern Írán, on the Caspian Sea. Ancient stronghold of the Parthian and Sassanian Empires, and the ancestral home of Bahá’u’lláh.
Merv FA: مرو‎ Also: Marv. Ancient city located on the Silk Road near the modern-day city of Mary, Turkmenistan.
Mihdí AR: ٱلْمَهْدِيّ‎ One who guides aright, the Guided One. A title of the Twelfth (expected) Imám or Qá’im. Mírzá Mihdí (“The Purest Branch”)
Mílán FA: میلان A village 23 km SW Tabríz, in Ádhirbáyján.
Mírzá FA: میرزا of noble lineage Derived from amírzádeh, meaning child of the Amír or child of the ruler. A term of respect which generally indicates a literate person. When used at the end of a name, it denotes a prince.[17]
Mishkín-Qalam FA: مشكین قلم One of the nineteen Apostles of Bahá'u'lláh, and famous calligrapher of 19th century Persia.
Mithqal AR: مثقال‎ Also Miskal. A unit of weight commonly used in Persia.[12]
Muḥammad AR: مُحَمَّد praised, commendable, laudable Also Mohammed. A common Arabic name, referring to the Prophet of Islam.
Muḥammarih Former name of Persian city Khurramshahr
Mujtahid AR: مُجْتَهِد‎ one who strives or one who exerts himself A mujtahid in contemporary Írán is now called an áyatu’lláh.
Mulk AR: ملك dominion The eighteenth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Mullá FA: ملا A member of the Muslim clergy.
Munírih FA: منیره luminous, radiant Munírih Khánum, wife of ‘Abdu’l-Bahá (mid 1848–28 April 1938)
Mustagháth AR: مستغث the one called upon for help Used as the name of God by the Báb.
N
Term Source Meaning Definition
Nabíl
Najaf
Najaf-Ábá­d FA: نجف‌آباد A city in Iran's Isfahan Province.
Náqiḍín opposers, violators Covenant-breakers.
Násiri'd-Dín FA: ناصرالدین شاه Protector/Defender of the Faith
Naw-Rúz FA: نوروز new day The new year of the Bahá’í calendar, falling on the day of the spring equinox, i.e. the day on which the sun enters the constellation of Aries as viewed from Tehran.
Nayríz FA: نی‌ریز‎ A city in Iran's Fars Province, southeast of Shíráz, and the site of a major struggle between Bábís and authorities under the Qajar dynasty.
Níshábúr FA: نیشابور A city in northeastern Iran's Razavi Khorasan province, and former capital of Khorasan Province.
Núr AR: نور light The fifth month of the Bahá’í calendar. Also
P
Term Source Meaning Definition
Pahlaví, Pahlawí belonging to a city; a citizen
Q
Term Source Meaning Definition
Qádí AR: قادی judge A civil, criminal, or ecclesiastical judge.[2]
Qádíyán AR: قادیان City in Punjab, India. The birthplace of Mirza Ghulam Ahmad, founder of the Ahmadiyya sect of Islam.
Qá’im FA: قائم He Who shall arise Title designating the Promised One of Islám.[2]
Qalyán FA: قالیان hookah A pipe for smoking through water.[2]
Qamṣar village 25 km south of Káshán, Írán
Qawl AR: قول speech The fourteenth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Qayyúm permanent, lasting, stable Superlative of Qá’im [the Báb], the Most Great One Who will arise [Bahá’u’lláh]
Qayyúmu'l-Asmá The Báb's commentary on the Qur'an's Surih of Joseph, characterized by Bahá'u'lláh as "the first, the greatest, and mightiest of all books" in the Bábí Dispensation.
Qazvín a city 140 km NW of Ṭihrán.
Qiblih AR: قبلة Also Qibla, Qiblah. The direction to which people turn in prayer; especially Mecca, the Qiblih of all Muslims.[2][18]
Qúchán city and capital of Qúchán County
Quddús The Most Holy
Qudrat AR: قدرة power The thirteenth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Qum holy city 130 km SSW of Ṭihrán, location of the Shrine of Ma’ṣúmih, the sister of Imám Riṣá, the eighth Imám
Qur’án AR: الۡقُرۡآنۡ recitation, reading, the word
Qurbán AR: قربان sacrifice[2]
Qurratu'l-ʿAyn A title of Táhirih, meaning Solace of the Eyes.
R
Term Source Meaning Definition
Rafsinján city and council in Kirmán province, Írán
Rahím merciful, compassionate one of the names (ar-Raḥím) of God
Raḥmán merciful, compassionate (God)
Raḥmat AR: رحمة mercy The sixth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Rasht city in province of Gílán
Rawḥání good, agreeable, clean and pure (place)
Riḍván AR: رضوان paradise The "King of Festivals" of the Bahá’í Faith, commemorating Bahá'u'lláh's 1863 declaration that He was a Manifestation of God, in the Garden of Ridván outside Baghdad. Also used literally in other contexts, to mean "paradise".
Rúḥu’lláh Spirit of God A designation Muslims use for Jesus. Son of Mírzá ‘Alí-Muḥammad-i-Varqá
S
Term Source Meaning Definition
Sabzivár F­A: سبزوار city in Khurásán Province
Sadratu’l-Muntahá AR: سِدْرَة ٱلْمُنْتَهَىٰ‎ Lote Tree of the Farthest Boundary Symbolically, the Lote tree in the Seventh Heaven; the utmost extremity, a boundary which no one can pass.
Ṣáḥibu’z-Zamán FA: صاحب زمان Lord of the Age One of the titles of the promised Qá’im.[2]
Sárí FA: ساری A town in eastern Mázindarán province. (GPB p. 40)
Sháh FA: شاه king, emperor, sovereign, monarch, prince A title given to the emperors and kings of Persia and other societies under Persian influence.
Sháhansháh FA: شاهنشاه‎ king of kings The full title of Persian emperors since the Achaemenid dynasty.
Shahíd AR: شهيد martyr Singular form.[2]
Shahmirzád FA: شهميرزاد‎ A town in the province of Semnan, 170 km east of Ṭihrán, Írán.
Sháhrúd FA: شاهرود a mighty river; name of a river Name of a crossroad city 330 km NE of Teheran. Also: a type of lute (musical instrument); the thickest cord of a musical instrument.
Sharaf AR: شرف honour The sixteenth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Shaykh AR: شیخ A learned man; generally used for elders, chiefs, professors, or heads of dervish orders.
Shaykhu’l-Islám AR: شيخ الإسلام Head of a religious court, appointed to every large city by the king or ruler.[2]
Shí’ih AR: شِيعَة‎ followers, i.e. of Ali Of or relating to Shia/****'ih Islam, the second largest branch of Islam.
Shíráz FA: شیراز‎ The capital of Fars province, Iran; birthplace of the Báb, and the site of His Declaration.
Shuhada AR: الشهداء martyrs Plural form.[2]
Shushtar
Simnán FA: سمنان‎ A province in northern Iran.
Sísán FA: سیسان Seysan, Sisan-e Qadim. A village in Eastern Ádhirbáyján province, Iran.
Sístán FA: سیستان‎ land of the Saka A historical and geographical region in eastern Iran and Southern Afghanistan; known in ancient times as Sakastan.
Síyáh-Chál FA: سیاه چال‎ black pit The dungeon south east of the palace of the Sháh and near the Sabzih-Maydán in Tehran in which Bahá'u'lláh was incarcerated for some months in 1852. It was originally built as a reservoir, storing water for the public baths nearby. In the Persian language, "Síyáh-chál" (Persian: سیاه چال, literally "black pit") is the common name for a dungeon.
Siyyid AR: سيد‎ A descendant of the Prophet Muhammad.[2]
Súfí AR: ٱلصُّوفِيَّة‎ one who wears wool Of, or relating to the mystical practice of Islam.
Sulaymán AR: سُليمان Solomon An Arabic given name referring to Solomon, King of Israel and son of King David.
Sulaymániyyih AR: السليمانية‎ A town in Kurdish Iraq. Bahá’u’lláh resided as a dervish in the mountains surrounding the town from 1854 to 1856.
Sulṭán AR: سلطان sovereignty The seventeenth month of the Bahá’í calendar.
Sulṭán-Ábád
Sulṭánu’sh-Shuhadá’ AR: سلطان الشهداء King of Martyrs A title given to Mírzá Muḥammad-Ḥasan of Isfahan.
Sunní AR: أهل السنة people of the sunnah, i.e. majority tradition Of or relating to Sunni Islam, the largest branch of Islam.
Súrih AR: سورة tablet, chapter Also: Surah, Súriy. A tablet, or letter. The chapters of the Qur'an are known as súrihs or surahs.[2]
Súriy-i-Ghuṣn AR: سورة الهيكل Tablet of the Branch Also: Súratu’l-Ghuṣn. A tablet of Bahá’u’lláh in which He confirms a high station for ‘Abdu’l-Bahá.
Súriy-i-Haykal AR: سورة الهيكل Tablet of the Temple Also: Súratu’l-Haykal. A tablet of Bahá’u’lláh published in Summons of the Lord of Hosts, which includes his messages addressed to five world leaders: Pope Pius IX, Napoleon III, Czar Alexander II, Queen Victoria, and Násiri'd-Dín Sháh.
Súriy-i-Mulúk AR: سورة الملوك Tablet of the Kings Also: Súratu’l-Mulúk. A tablet of Bahá’u’lláh published in Summons of the Lord of Hosts, addressed collectively to the monarchs of the East and the West.
Súriy-i-Ra'ís AR: سورة الرئيس Tablet of the Chief Also: Súratu’l-Ra'ís. A tablet of Bahá’u’lláh published in Summons of the Lord of Hosts, addressed to ‘Alí Páshá, the Ottoman Prime Minister.
T
Term Source Meaning Definition
Tabríz FA: تبریز flowing hot capital of Ádharbayján Province, Írán.
Ṭáhirih FA: طاهره‎ clean, pure; chaste, modest, virtuous The pure one
Tajallíyát AR: ﺍﻟﺘﺠﻠﻴﺎﺕ lustre, brightness, brilliancy, effulgence A tablet of Bahá’u’lláh published in Tablets of Bahá’u’lláh.
Tákur FA: تاكور village 40 km south of Núr and 47.5 km NE of Afjihin. It is Bahá’u’lláh’s ancestral home.
Ṭarázát AR: ﺍﻟﻄﺮﺍﺯﺍﺕ ornaments A royal robe, or rich dress ornamented with embroidery. Name of a tablet of Bahá’u’lláh published in Tablets of Bahá’u’lláh.
Tarbíyat FA: تربيت education, upbringing, teaching, instruction, pedagogy The name of a group of Bahá’í schools established in Ṭihrán around the turn of the 20th century.
Ṭashkand FA: تاشکند city of stones; place on a hill Tashkent, capital of Uzbekistan
Tawhid AR: توحيد‎ unification, union, combination, fusion Oneness of God, the most important article of faith in Islam.
Thurayyá AR: الثريا The Pleiades; a star cluster once seen and described by the Prophet Muhammad. Used as a female given name (Soraya).
Ṭihrán FA: تهران‎ a warm place; Tir's abode; bottom of the mountain Tehran/Teheran, capital of Írán, birthplace of Bahá’u’lláh.
Túman A sum of money equivalent to a dollar.[2][12]
U
Term Source Meaning Definition
‘Ulamá AR: أولاما knowers Also Ulema. Learned men of Islam, i.e. theologians, canon lawyers, professors, muftis, etc; a council of the learned, especially in a Muslim state.[19]
Urúmíyyih FA: ارومیه water town Also Urmia, Orumiyeh. City in West Ádharbáyján Province, Írán, located near the lake of the same name.[4]
Ustád FA: اوستاد master A master craftsman.
V
Term Source Meaning Definition
Vaḥíd FA: وحید alone, solitary Superlative form of ‘waḥada’, to be alone. Numerical value of 28.
Váḥid FA: واحد unity The 19-year cycle of the Bahá’í calendar.
Valí-‘Ahd FA: ولیعهد heir to the throne[2] A crown prince, or chosen successor.
Varqá FA: ورقا Dove
Vazír FA: وزیر burden-bearer, helper[20] Also Vizier, Vizir, Wazír. The chief minister and representative of the caliph, and later, of the head of state of the Persian and Ottoman Empires.[20]
W
Y
Term Source Meaning Definition
Yá ‘Alíyyu’l-‘Alá “O Thou the Exalted of the Exalted” or “O Thou the Exalted, the Most Exalted”. A form of the name of the Báb, used as an invocation.
Yá Alláhu'l-Mustagháth AR: يا الله المستغث “O God, He Who is invoked” or “O Thou God Who art invoked”
Yá Bahá’u’l-Abhá AR: يا بهاء الأبهى “O Glory of the All-Glorious” or “O Thou the Glory of the Most Glorious”. A form of the name of Bahá’u’lláh, used as an invocation.
Yaḥyá AR: يحيى John A common Arabic given name, referring to John the Baptist.
Yazd A province and city in central Írán, notable as the primary centre of the Persian Zoroastrian population.
Z
Term Source Meaning Definition
Zádih son of;[2] descendant of Also Zadeh, Zada. A common patronymic suffix.
Zanján Also Zenján.[21] City between Qazvín and Tabríz, home of Ḥujjat; site of a major battle in which Bábís were massacred.
Zaynu’l-Muqarrabín “the Ornament of the Near Ones” or “the Ornament of the favoured”

"A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z"

A- anhin ang pag-ibig mo kung mag-isa ka nalang lumalaban?
B- initiwan na niya ang pangako ng walang hanggan.
C- are, meron ba siya nito? Pinaramdam ba niya ito sa'yo?
D- arating sa puntong makakamoveon ka rin.
E- wan ko sa'yo ba't ka pa nagpapakatanga.
F- unny, dahil sa sense of humor niya nahulog ka.
G- inawa mo na ang lahat pero hindi pa rin sapat.
H- inigit na niya ng tuluyan ang pagmamahal na itinarak niya sa puso mo kaya masyadong masakit ang nadarama mo.
I- iwan ka man ng lahat sa mundo, subalit ang Panginoon ay laging nariyan para sa'yo.
J- ust cry. Dapat **** ilabas yan at huwag kimkimin.
K- ahit anong mangyari may nagmamahal sa'yo; pamilya mo at si Lord.
L- ahat ng sakit at hapdi na iyong natatamasa ay may hangganan.
M- aging matatag kang harapin ang pagsubok ng pag-ibig.
N- aisin **** huwag tangayin sa baha na gawa ng iyong emosyon. Lumaban ka.\
O- nly you. Wag kang maniwala. Hindi ka nag-iisa.
P- atunayan mo na hindi siya kawalan. Na kaya mo kahit wala siya sa tabi mo.
Q- ueen, ikaw raw kasi ang reyna ng mundo niya pero salawahan siya. May Emperatress pa palang nauna na mas mataas pa sa'yo at mas mahalaga.
R- espeto, kung meron siya nito, seryoso siya sa iyo.
S- a tingin mo minahal ka talaga niya?
T- iwala lang, wag umasa.
U- nawain mo sana na pag pumasok ka sa isang relasyon hindi ka naglalaro lamang. Unawain mo na sa pagmamahal hindi puro ligaya lamang.
V- ase, yan ang turing niya sa iyo. Nilagyan ka lang ng bulaklak pero hindi pinapalitan ng tubig hanggang sa nalanta ka sa puso niya, in short sa simula ka lang niya minahal pero kalaunan wala na siyang pakialam.
W- ag ka nang magpakatanga next time. Wag paulit-ulit kasi pag nasaktan ka nakakasawa na rin minsan pakinggan ang salitang "ayoko na" pero ang totoo, tanga ka pa rin sa susunod na pag-ibig mo.
X- ylophone. Parang paulit-ulit na pinatugtog ang puso mo at pinupokpok kaya masyadong masakit para sa'yo at paulit-ulit **** mararamdaman ang tugtog ng hapdi at kirot na dulot ng pag-ibig.
Y- ung pangako niya sa'yo balang araw tatawanan mo na lang.
Z- ipper your heart kapag nakamove on ka na. Muli itong magbubukas sa taong... muling mananamasa at mananakit sa puso mo este magmamahal pala sa'yo hanggang sa iyong pagtanda.
Now you know your ABC
Let's play words
And sing with me.

"چاند ایک نئے انداز میں گنگنائے گا۔"
"Chaand ek naye andaaz mein gungunaega."

"اہ، خوبصورت چھوٹا سا حسین تل، آسمان کا ایک ٹکڑا کھولے گا۔"
"Ah, khoobsurat chhota sa haseen til, aasman ka ek tukda khole ga."

"کل کے دروازے پر، رات کے پرسکون سائے میں۔"
"Kal ke darwaze par, raat ke pursukoon saaye mein."

"کان نیچے رکھتے ہوئے، ستاروں کی گلیاں بھی جھکتی ہیں۔"
"Kaan neeche rakhte hue, sitaron ki galiyan bhi jhukti hain."

"سمندر بھی اونچی قافیوں کی لہریں بہا دیتا ہے۔"
"Samandar bhi oonchi qafiyon ki lehren baha deta hai."

"تب ہی پردہ دار روحانی رات ایک بار اپنی کاجل سیاہ، پراسرار آنکھ کھولتی ہے!"
"Tab hi pardah daar rohani raat ek baar apni kajal siyah, purasrar aankh kholti hai!"

کل کے دروازے پر رات کے گہرائیوں میں
"Kal ke darwaze par raat ke gehraaiyon mein"

walang bago
sa naimbak na lumot
sa butas na alulod
tiyak ang emosyon
mata'y napupusyaw
pipikit saglit
lalamunin ng tugtog
ang bagyo
tahimik sa gitna
nakamamatay sa paligid
at hindi mo iyon batid

walang bahid
ng luha
walang pantay
ang kulay o paa
sa pagkabalisa
magkapatong
ang binti sa ginaw

walang tunog
ang hudyat
hindi mulat
ang bantay
walang tabing
sa hangin
walang pader
sa habagat
o bundok sa baha

walang ulila
o buhos na tila
inipong ragasa
pagtitimpi

lumot
na naimbak
lumikha ng buhay
ulan

Like coffee in the morning
I grew used to you somehow
It started bitter and without warning
  it is ending that way now

Like Gene Kelly or Sinatra
You have Marlon Brando class
Went to pop music from the opera
Now I cant stop thinking about ***

Like two stings out of tune
We always seem to clash
Bring your beauty to the room
Where the music doesn't match

Art is ever changing: lke w/e idc
People rearranging: Thrz no bEutY Ne wer3
(Jaha baha LOL
They prolly tlk like diz N h3L7 )

"A" crowned my head with a crown like
twigs while "A" was seated on the Throne.
Notice how Baha'u'llah reverberates that it is a different
throne, yet in essence the same One.
Fire like a rainbow.
Notice how a Prophet would gulp when another Prophet is
"mentioned".
Notice how a Prophet does not need to "believe" in else
except God.
"C" is same.
If I am a Prophet without a voice from God, please
don't let me speak.
All the Prophets have transparent beauty like
"C".
Above the City of Immortality is the Valley of
the Manifestations.  Where the Sun of Reality
is home and all the denizens are refreshed
and find God again from whence they have
left.  Nothing but God lies above this Valley
and the Presence of the Beloved is aglow
....in every limb.
The Presence is enlivening and heavy
in vitality.
"I hate you, I love, I hate that I love you",
echoes to hearts not attune to the Transcendent One.
The Presence has a unique energy that allows
Them to change the universe of lower natures.
All stresses dissipate away.
Those Eyes that see all of me.
Energy as if from another world,
as if always awakening from bed.
It is sitting in the Manifestation's Tent.
It is feeling Their skin become mine own skin.
Light so warm that it is cool.
Names have no place here,
only Spirit - the Transcendent.
I forget myself and
instead caught up in "A".
The fullness of the Manifestations will soon, soon
manifest in all of us.
24 karat Golden DNA.

ala-singko ng umaga. nakakabingi ang katahimikan ng pagsikat ng araw. walang tigil ang pagtakbo ng oras at tulad ng araw, nagsimula nanaman ang pangkaraniwang siklo ng buhay. patungo sa sintang paaralan na ang bawat yapak ay parang timbang ng daigdig na nakalubog sa aking mga balikat. hindi kayang buhatin kahit pa ng buong mundo sapagkat ako'y nag-iisa sa paglalakbay patungong españa.

sa bawat sulok ng maynila at mga kwento sa mga kalsadang ito, may mga paalala ng mga biyaheng hindi pa nararating at mga pangarap na patuloy hinahanap. sa kanto ng españa't lacson, sa kabila ng paghahanap at pag-asa, hindi natagpuan ang isa't isa. sa magkabilang sulok ng noval at dapitan, ang iyong mga imahe ay tila mga alaala na nakaukit sa pinakaloob ng aking isipan, kumakatok nang palaging handang buksan ang pintuan. bawat hakbang ko ay may kabigha-bighani **** presensya, subalit ang hinahanap kong pagtatagpo ay patuloy na umiwas sa akin, nag-iwan ng hinagpis at naglakbay nang walang direksyon.

"manong para po" ang aking bulong sa jeepney drayber na parang tinik na dumadaloy sa aking lalamunan, humihila at humihila sa mga alaala na tila mga bagyong dumaraan sa aking isipan. bawat sinag ng araw, bawat hagupit ng hampas ng hangin, ay parang himagsik ng damdamin na hindi ko maitago.

sa bawat kanto paikot ng españa, naroon ang mga multo ng ating nakaraan. mga anino ng mga alaala na hindi ko matakasan at sa bawat pagtatanong mo kung may pag-asa pa ba, ang bawat sagot ko ay tila mga punyal na tumatagos sa aking kalooban, nagsasabing wala nang dahilan para muling mangarap.ayaw ko nang lumakad sa landas ng nakaraan, na puno ng  mga bakas na minsan tayo'y nagtahup na patuloy na bumabalik at sumisira sa isipan.

at sa wakas, narito na ako sa dulo ng aking paglalakbay, ngunit ang landas na tinahak ay tila isang malawak na dagat, hindi alintana kung gaano karaming bagyo at baha ang dinaanan. at kung tatanungin mo ako kung pu-puwede pa ba, ang hihilingin ko sa iyo ay mga barya papalayo sa'yo. ayaw ko nang malunod sa unang daan na puno ng kahapon at mga alaalang tila multong ayaw umahon.

at sa bawat paghakbang ko patungo sa hinaharap, ang iyong alaala ay parang banta na nagbubulag-bulagan sa akin tuwing naglalakbay ako. nakakapangilabot. mahal pa rin kita. mahal pa rin pala kita.

hindi na kasingpait ng dati.
pero mahal, masakit pa.

Alam kong umpisa na ng tag-init dyan.
O baka lingid sa kaalaman ko'y
sa susunod na linggo pa o kalaunan.
Ngunit kung paano ang tag-init dyan
o gaano kainit ay hindi ko alam.
Paano ang tag-init dyan sa inyo?
Gaano ka-init ang mainit dyan sa bahay mo?
Sana'y naaarawan ka ng sapat at tama,
sana'y palaging malusog ka at masaya.

Alam mo bang tag-ulan na rito ng Hunyo?
O maaaring para sayo ay patak pa lang,
o marahil mga mumunting tulo.
Ngunit kung gaano kaginaw
o paano ang tag-ulan ay hindi mo alam.
Gaano kaginaw, gaya ba ng taas ng baha?
Paano ang patak ng ulan, tulad ba ng luha?
Sana'y bagyuhin at tangayin ang mga mali,
sana'y mawala na ang alaalang gipit.

Alam kong tag-init na pag Hunyo sa inyo.
Ngunit alam mo ba talaga kung gaano ka-init
kung ikaw sana'y narito sa silid ko?
Alam mo ba ang tunay na tag-init,
gayong di mo pa nararanasan sa bisig ko?
Hindi mo malalaman kung gaano kainit ang mainit
hangga't ika'y wala sa tabi ko.
Ang tunay na tag-init ay nasa aking piling.

Alam mo nang tag-ulan na rito ng Hunyo.
Ngunit kung malalaman mo nga kung gaano kaginaw,
tulad siguro ng paghagkan sa bloke ng yelo.
Alam mo ba ang tunay na tag-ulan,
tila mga patak ng luha kung mawawala ako.
Malalaman mo kung gaano kaginaw ang maginaw
kung mawawala ako sa buhay mo.
Ang tunay na tag-ulan ay ang aking kawalan.

Melting under this Plastic World,
Mickey Mouse is a rat that ate the poison,
I feel this wave coming over me,
riding the tide like I'm Poseidon,

totally sick of this circus like Icarus,
flying dangerously close to The Sun,
I'm high in a high rise on syd in Sydney,
like Midas my God what have we done,

it's as if,
everything we touches turns to gold,
invested in,
IOTA last week this week it's up 10 fold,

BitCoin hit 15k,
here we go we're on our way,
bought in out of fear of getting left out,
like a cat in the rain,

feeling like a cannibal animal,
every dog has it's day,
working to the bone like a bog,
& we all want our $ at the end of the day,

when the work’s done,
everyone's gonna wanna get paid,
feeling mixed up in the middle,
half way between a master & a slave,

what a mess we’ve made,
& I’m not blaming any particular one,
I’m just saying collectively,
this feels like the eulogy of,

a civilization that's time has come,
& is almost done,
& yeah we might lose it all,
but at least we had some fun,

& oh what fun we’ve had,
but who'll be left to clean up this mess,
because all the cool kids have gone,
& you're the only one left,

like the morning after the party,
sunrises are never the same as sunsets,
had some fun times last night,
but this morning you're such a wreck,

sometimes only at crunch time do you find,
our failures disguised as accomplishments,

now who’s left behind to pay enough mind,
to clean up our post bliss mess,
not snotty nosed spoiled rotten rich kids,
who got gassed up on daddy’s cash,
they're crashed out at their pad now,
but we both knew they wouldn't last,

passed out on dad's couch,
can always tell the future from the past,

everyone’s,
acting like an ***,
jockeying in position,
for some corporate kick backs,

but if or when you get them,
they come along with a guilty conscience,
then tell me what good is that,
seems all these facts are just nonsense,

I mean really what good is this,
what good are all these words,
I guess these words are only worth,
whatever a words worth is really worth,

which at this point,
feels worth about as much as dirt,
but at least it's that good dirt,
that Mount Agung before it bursts,
that fertile volcanic soil,
that Mother Love from Mother Earth,

sure,

you might think you’ve got it figured out,
or at least you thought you did,
& now you see what’s coming now,
& the mess we’ve made of all this ****t,

the drama we did with no apologies,
no apologies nor compliments,
no honor for the Honor Rollers,
nor for our awkward accomplishments,

and all I want to know,
is where the Hell honest went,
'cause all these dollars & all this power,
at the end of the day amounts to zip,

zero,
no heroes,
& as it turns out,
all of our idols are weirdos,

how's we go,
from Einsteins to Weinsteins,
from talking out our feelings,
to just replying with “I'm fine.”,

from Greek Gods to Mickey Mouse,
from Orwell's Animal Farm to Animal House,
from Mozart's 'Requiem Lacrimosa',
to Baha Men's 'Who Let The Dogs Out',

how'd we get from then,
to where we are now,

& you only want to talk about the weather,
or anything else that doesn't matter,
instead of what's really on your mind,
& how it's all almost over,

talking about what's for lunch,
while the world floods & burns,
not trying to be too negative,
just trying to help you learn,

because I know you think I'm cool,
but really I feel hot as Hell,
is it just me or is it hot in here,
is it just me or does nothing feel real,

like a Barbie girl in a Barbie world,
all dolled up & wrapped in plastic,
like I'm at at Disneyland on acid,
only about an hour & a half in,
& already I'm having a bad trip,
stuck on a boat on a fake mountain,
it's a joke that they call it magic,
trying to slow as everything goes faster,

but I'm not at Disneyland,
I'm just in a high-rise on syd in Sydney,
looking at the man in the mirror like MJ,
thinking I don't know that man who is he?

MMelting under this Plastic World,
Mickey Mouse is a rat that ate the poison,
I feel this wave coming over me,
riding the tide like I'm Poseidon,
totally sick of this circus like Icarus,
flying dangerously close to The Sun,
I'm high in a high rise on syd in Sydney,
like Midas my God what have we done.

∆ LaLux ∆

from The Sydney Sessions
available for FREE worldwide 12/12/17

There was once a famous painter who, to express his love for a woman, cut his own ear off and sent it to her. We all know the story. Even I, a pretty eccentric and extreme person myself, thinks that's way too extreme. but hey, nothing says I Love You like a ****** chunk of cartage stuffed in an envelope right?

A couple days ago you told me to do something that scares the **** out of me, at least once everyday. No, I didn't cut my ear off or anything like that. lol. but that night I sat and thought about things that frighten me but to no avail. I wouldn't say I'm fearless, but I'm a person who enjoys taking risks and prides himself on surviving the most horrific experiences. There aren't many things in this world that rattle me. I'm not superstitious, I have no interest in what others think about me, and pain is only temporary. Well, Physical pain. Pain of a more emotional variety can last. Years even. An intangible, constricting weight of question. A couple thousand needles of "What if?". A potent venom of repeating "I wish". The things that spread your eyelids apart in the middle of the night. When you tell your body "No." When you squeeze your pillow and mumble to your own thoughts "No, don't you dare wander to that place." When you plead with yourself to forget.

Nights like this are the reason why I find it hard to write you, the nights where I don't sleep, can't sleep until I write you and even though most times I don't send the messages, (Or they get sent to you accidently baha) I'm gonna send this one to you. Because it scares the **** out of me.

Starting is the hardest part. It's been probably forty five minutes since I've started the occasional ritual of tossing my bed covers aside and pacing around my room tenderly as if I'm scanning the ground for the words I need, as if I could just pick them right up and hand them to you. However, I always find nothing. I skip every other step on the way down to the computer and sit gingerly in my lame floral chair, watching my cursor blink against your empty message box. It speaks to me. "Blink type something ****** Blink." After a few minutes of typing and erasing and typing and erasing I thought "This is stupid." Then I remembered the story about the painter. It made me think. People have always done stupid things for love. Sure, I'd be embarrassed and vulnerable and possibly even having you meet me with a spine shattering "sigh", "This is getting old." or even have "What is the ****** point?" hammering my morning thoughts. But Hey, At least I'm not mutilating myself.

Well. I tend to beat around the bush a lot, but at this rate I'm just stepping on the twigs. Dancing on the torn leaves and such. I'll stop. I have some things I want to tell you.

I won't let my guilt stop me from saying what I want to say this time as I've done many times in the the past. I think that's what holds me back, the guilt? Whatever.. I mean you're over it, I should be too. I know you're over me too, but that won't stop me either. Des, I miss you. I miss your voice. The medicine in your laugh, the discipline in your scowl. The way that we'd talk all through the night till one of us unked it. The several stones that would plop in my stomach when I would get a text from 'Desire Deslonchamps', Your french *** name (It's so **** btw) I miss the armada of butterflies roosting on my ribs whenever you'd tell me you adored me. I miss our conversations, you have always reached higher than anyone else I have ever talked to intellectually and I mean that quite literally. it baffles me how no matter who else I was with, they were never good enough. That I was always comparing them to you, and thinking "Des wouldn't have said that." or "Des would have loved this more." No one is as funny or talkative or as tender or as wild as you. I would stuff every single one of those girls in a shredder just for even 5 minutes with you.

I look through your pictures all the time, I feel like a teenager sifting dreamily through a magazine looking at some chiseled, oiled up celebrity that doesn't even know she exists. I read everything you post, I worry when you seem sad, I laugh when you laugh. Everytime Facebook tells me you've uploaded and new picture I always go look and end up sighing like a ***** maiden. Excuse the metaphor but it's true. haha.

A couple days ago, when you were telling me about your ex, for a second I kind of thought you were talking about me... and I got so excited, I really thought that you still felt for me and that maybe I hadn't completely lost it and that you weren't jaded or whatever, but when you showed me what you actually did write him, and everything and... ugghh, I just felt so stupid. Sososososo stupid. I don't know why... and I know you still really like him and everything, but I just want to let you know that the level of emotion and personal attention I have for you is strong and consistent. I'm not saying that no one will ever feel for you as strongly as I do, But I'm saying that it'd be pretty **** hard to top it. I just want to let you know that this will never go away. I have tried everything short of a lobotomy but I can't ever, and will never forget about you. I know how foolish it is, but there is no way I could ever help it. Humanity help me, it's literally impossible to knock, like that crazy romance **** You see in movies. It's unreal.

Desiree I think about you more than I think about Sableyes and Adoring fans and Acid trips and soft melodies. All of the things I daydream about. Whenever I daydream, I always add on the wishful thought of someday sharing whatever I'm dreaming about with you, or just sharing me with you. I laugh hysterically in my head at the thought of ever being what I once was to you again, a laugh developed by my pride to stifle my cries and soak up my tears before they ever surface. No, I'm not sad all the time, just when the thinking reaches a fever pitch. Sad isn't the word, more like frustrated. You know me better than anyone on this planet, seriously, You know that I have problems communicating my feelings properly. Most of the thinking is me trying to put words together for you. Though I usually don't come up with anything until I actually do write you, There's always been one thing that I've wanted to tell you that I could never form an appropriate form for and even saying it now would do it an injustice because I can't make these words jump off of the screen and wrap it's arms securely around waist, or whisper quietly in your ear or emulate the disparity of them properly, it's all I got. This xenomorphic phrase.

Physical pain may be temporary, but I'm still too much of a ***** to cut off my own ear, So these words, They're all I have left. The only thing that I can give to you with every bit of a human heart and genuine honesty I have...

Desiree Deslongchamps,

I love you.

There are people I miss.
I miss their touch and the physicality of it all.

However, now I have a profound peace
Of the presence of Baha’u’llah.
The Spirit of patience, of wisdom.
It pervades my heart
And I say to myself:
“How long will you sulk over your ex?”

I have less than I did when we were together:
In the physical.
However, I have more spirit in my heart now.
I’m stronger for putting up with your weakness,
Your vanity.

However, I see I have the same vain imaginations in me.
Will I ever fall for a spiritual person
Without needing her to be able to fulfill my chemical desires?

I want to throw away the possibility for another relationship
And cling to the idea of singleness.
But it is the incessant inclination to create offspring and secure love
That drives me crazy still.

Who will I meet?
I don’t want to desire another woman if my search will end without promise.
But I continue in my folly.

Alas, day by day my desire pulses
And it is still greeted with empty dreams.

I’m packed full with opposite dispositions
Subtle ones.

I progress towards the Maker
One dark bedroom at a time.