"Say, whus tha good wurd, Mista Mornin Bird?"
"Ahh, ya know just chillin here singin these here tunes waitin fah Mista Worm."
"Ahh dat Mista Worm - he alwayz be runnin late."
"True dat!”
”Yo! peep this...
Last night he took his ol girl out on a date."
''A date? Really? Mistah Worm?”
"Yup.
But it getz betta tho.
It wuz dare anniversary. Ol fool went to tha chapel an got married."
"MARRIED!!??"
"mmhmm."
"Where dey get married?"
"At dare special spot in tha apple orchard.
Mistah worm told me he and hiz girl are movin to the Big Apple.”
“Big Apple? Fah what?”
“He gunna work fah tha East New York Farms.  I guess hiz uncle Jim
got him in.”
“…Mista Worm…”

"Say, howz Mista Skunk doin?  He evah get clean?"
"I dont see much of him theez dayz.  Heard heez down on his luck. Evah since tha paper mill closed he aint been tha same.  Heez so stressed out he got mo white hairz than a polar bear.”
“Dammmnnn!!!”
”Sumone told me that heez a nasty lil ol drunk wit a funky attitude and a quick tempa!
No wunda hiz wife leftem.
My understandin iz he still outta work - rummigin through peoples junk - collectin cans, tryin to make a buck.
Itz a **** shame, aint it?"
"Uh huh."

"Howz Mista Rabbit?"
"Miiiista Rabbit! Oohh dat Mista Rabbit he dunn got himself a nasty habbit."
"Whys dat?"
"He be stealin outta Mizz Jonsens garden again.
Otha day Mizz Jonsen shooed him away chasin him down tha block wit a pair of ol rusty scissors in her hand."
"Scissors!!??"
"Yup. She told him next time he wont be so lucky wit out hiz foot."
"WHUT!!??  Whus dat suppose da mean?"
"I dunno.”
"Dat Mizz Jonsen gone crazy!!
She dunn lost her mind in her ol age.
She crazier than a ******* rat!
Man, when Mista Rabbit gunna learn?”
"I guess when he haz no foot."

"Say, you talk to Mista Squirrel at all?"
“Itz been sum time.”
“How wuz he doin?”
"Man, you know Mistah Squirrel.  He wuz all ova da place, or at least he wuz.  He alwayz be jumpin from one tree to tha next, alllllwayz tryin to get a nut or two.  Last I heard he got deported and now lives in anotha county.”
“Why iz dat?”
“He dunn got locked up fah breakin in a few too many attics. They finally caught him....Stoopid fool."
''****…”

"Nuff about tha neighbahood.  How you been?  Havent seen you inna while."
"Im still doin my thang, ya know.
Roamin from town ta town, chasin down tail."
"Yous still chillin in dem alleys too?"
"Fa sho!"
"Man, aint a **** thang changed wit chu.
Yous alwayz been a cool cat...”

Could it be my destiny to be lonely?
That thought alone alwayz fathoms
Though I make love to them like they’re my soul mates
I treat them like they do not matter
I give my love like cupid but my emotions I turn into an undertaker
I bury them.... afraid that it’ll one day be used against me so I rather play it safer

Could it be my destiny to be alone?
Roam the world lost like a nomad with no place of home
Just tell me you “love me” as I caress your neck with my lips
I steal her soul and feed off of her energy as our tongues twist
I know she’s lying, hell I want her to cuz I can’t afford it to be real
Because I rather have scars from the past than new wounds that have to heal

Could it be my destiny to be in a solitary state?
I write this as I lay here next to her, wish I could remember her name
And she probably doesn’t even remember mine
But it’s fine....
This is continuous, with a new woman in bed alwayz next to me
I’m crying out for help here but for tonight just love me even though you don’t love me because alone is my destiny

I swear I love her, I.... I swear I love her
but I don't understand why I wanna fuvk all the others
She heavy on my mind **** I’m alwayz thinkin of her
But I'm kissing on this stranger plus forgot to use a rubber

My actions is on my conscious,
thinkin my doings are nonsense
don’t know how she has a concept
of me being honest

I promise I'll never lie
but she sees the truth in my eyez
don't even know why I lie
but I do it all the time

The truth is alwayz clear
but the proof is never there
Her pain jus disappears
like magic and smoke & mirrors.... ****

**** I need her, ****.... **** I need her
I deceive her & she knows it **** I can't fuvkin believe her

Cuz she rather be with me than being all alone
But I swear she was doing good until I came along

Valerie's
misery
seems to be
lead from me
but she won't leave and that's a total mystery

Every morning I would hear the metal wheels grind against the rails as the garage door opened
Leave for school as you were under the hood staring at horse power repairing every engine that was broken

Returned home and now you’re underneath a different car, your face blackened from the dirt, oil and debris
And at night sometimes I’d hold the flashlight for you, pointing the light at the wrong spots of the engine, I’d help to some degree

Rarely spoke but wrenches clanked, ratchets ticked, screws and bolts rattled and power tools revved
It’s the language that I never understood but it’s the language I know you’ve said

The garage doors would close, I’d smell the scent of Mary Jane coming from your room, swear the odor was limitless
Then I would hear the rifts and solos from the guitar strings that were plucked by your fingertips

Life as a grease monkey and a rockstar but you loved every second of it, you love everything you do
I wish one day I could find my own love and become something just like you

I see why my mother loves you

You called me your son though we’re not blood I swear I miss you in every way
You’ve alwayz told me to look out for my sister and to protect her everyday

Happy birthday

IM SO OVER PEOPLE LIKE… REAL ***** ****…. CAUSE KITS ALWAYZ SOMETHING FOR REAL….. LOST MY BESTFRIEND OVER SOME ****…..SO BOOO OVER SOME ****…..NOW I JUST DON’T GIVE A **** ANYMORE…. REAL N TRULY PEOPLE CAN DO THEM CAUSE IM OUT… END OF THE STORY…..

IM DONE CRYING OVER PEOPLE N FEELING BAD FOR ANYBODY SHIDDDD IM DOIN ME FOR LIFE… MA ALWAYS SAID DON’T EVER CRY OVER NO ***** OR NO ***** SO

FAMILY ALWAYZ MATTER

my back was unpressurized tonight about 3 hours ah, i was about
to type ago. What else, well
just interviewing
myself
about to ask me some questionz. Who is
that person alive somewhere longing to
unshackle themselves / yet keys are within
the thread that it weaves. Yes,
to life, beautifully strengthen one another,
live vicariously and hear it in the thunder.
Bail out of blunderz
ve
all daily wonder of something or another.
Watch
the rain
fall instinctively smoke
rises from desserted dust
laying scorched in the earth
as imaginary beliefs of solutions littering
pollution. Forgiveness the farthest away from our
mind, just strands of dna connected intertwined at
the roots, i am putting on my boot. Think of
correct statements to say that it will alwayz feel, stay
this way. Pause, oxygen circulatez, pattering rain on a roof sounds
like
footsteps marching
unfortunately in battle. The most unjust
cruel
   inhumane
self serving consumer
professional mind controlling false deitiez,
     this war of loss.

She don't live here no mo’
She left me lonely n cold
She took a part of my soul
The only part that I know
I look in the mirror, reflections unknown
Cuz I don't know who I am, hope I don't lose control
Drugs got me addicted
love has been evicted
From my heart that's been afflicted
Got my Chest feelin constricted
Ready to fight
Feelin hella defensive
but really I'm jus defenseless
Livin’ life jus like a misfit
Sinning to live, got wisdom to give
got these jewels that I drop jus listen to this:
Love will get you killed
blood will pour and spill
and thugz will mourn but still
The pain will resonate
the drugs and all these pills
will turn change into hate
And all the love you feel
will die and slowly fade
turn numb from all the crime
Somewhat like doing time
cuz ur trapped behind bars cuz love left, said goodbye
It's just a stranger
closely kept by danger
and this anger will alwayz linger
locked up in cages
unleashed in stages
random; cannot contain it
no one will understand it or feel how the pain is
so loves is gone
packed up, left me alone,
no one home
and I'm asking where did the love go?
and it shows cuz I ain't the same
tryna hide all the strain
Feelin trapped in my brain
smoke these blunts for the pain
it's kinda hard to maintain
cuz I'm supposed to be strong with no one else for the blame

want a new addiction, want to fall victim
explain to me: why do dem females have similar names?
i was blacklisted and then i got promoted

all my poems were burned by me
and i destroyed all my novels, dramas and stories
blog entries, essays and term paperz...

and every time i closed my eyes, i stopped existing
the creature of the night, ******* of da city
fundamental, livin' under mental conditionz
chanukka and christmaz, gimme me three minutez:

imma be, stay and i'll have claimed my spot in it
no matter where ya at, anthony and antwone,
italo-africanz, meet dem boyz, cry, run, but die
no room for da shy, da law of the chosen few

8000 family memberz, nationwide and global
and don't they dare to fukk around -- we alwayz local

I don’t know where to start.....

She has me baffled because I cannot believe she betrayed my trust
She forgot about us
For what? For lust?
Lust mistaken for love

Gained attention from a new source that causes a chain reaction of butterflies and smiles

Her old love has been forgotten
For her new love is exciting

Out with the old in with the new
Deception was formed and you knew...

I yearned for your affection but you ignored my calls
You burned my obsession and you added to my flaws

I’m afraid to love again cause you loved me when I was nothing and I guess I couldn’t
take it
So how will I love again if I feel these girls alwayz fake it....

Our love was sacred, a bond everlasting
But everything has an end and our love never lasted
It died it’s in a casket
Our fires exntinguished and the pain surpasses
the joy that was conceived and received
But I was deceived into this make belief

This so called fairy tale....
Ended up to be my very hell
Left me weary, frail
Trapped in a deadly cell.
Remebering our existence very well....

I’m cursed, I’m hexed
With words and stress
My nerves are wrecked
It’s absurd and yes.....

I still love you, **** I can’t help it
Your smile lingers in my mind and I can’t accept it
That it’s gone and I took it for granted and lost it
Your smile makes me smile, ironic, cuz the pain you caused it

Exhausted........

.
1. When you fall in love, make sure it's with
somebody who treats you exactly how you
deserve to be treated.
.
2. Love somebody who wants to know everything
about you, from your favourite colour to your
childhood memories how you managed to survive
all those years.
.
3. Love somebody who can make you laugh, who
kisses your forehead and who notices all your
flaws but choses to see past them.
.
4. Love somebody who listens to whatever is on
your mind,who protects you and alwayz reminds
you how blessed they are to have found you.
.
5. Love somebody who you can't stay mad at for
more than an hour because you miss speaking to
them, who knows every freckle on your face,
every stretch mark on your thighs, every scar and
every tear.
.
6. Love somebody who you can plan your future
with,and most importantly love somebody who is
God fearing.
.
7. And lastly dont forget to make them feel loved
in return .
.
*If you agree with those 7 reasons i have listed above, Share to your friends.

Missing you terribly
maybe you were right
I alwayz told you to fight
Useless, Im taking flight
See you soon enough
this life is doom
as i sit here wallowing
in this dark room
reminding me of you
*** the pain
show me rain
nothing more to give
call me insane
im really tired
ive suffered soo long
please forgive me
right or wrong...
... Kelcee All

I have dreams of chaotic things, visions of blood and gore
Can’t seem to get this madness outside of my mind, afraid to close my eyes anymore.
The carnage that is produced from my imagination is somewhat related to my reality; because I’m living in hell.
The evils that men do motivates me to alwayz do the right thing well.
I’m supposed to be a protector, I run towards the chaos while others are fleein’
But who is supposed to help me with my demons?
I see ghost when I’m awake and monsters in this caged cell called my thoughts.
Even my day dreams aren’t safe to endure.
Paranoia has left me sick without a cough.
Insomnia seems to be the cure.
I have nightmares......
I wake up,
I’m shook up,
I look up,
I say “****!”
Drenched in cold sweat as I reach for my loaded arm for safety, my point forty five
The death I’ve seen comes back in my dreams at night........
It’s morning, time to shake it off because I have a duty to uphold to others....
Protect them from their nightmares

The soul is a piece of many but the soul is special im not one but two with my girlfriend we are one but two we can make anything possible we will go from laughing to fighting to crying then back to laughing we are one we will make our souls one or two in our hardest times today we are one yesterday we were two the soul is not one but two people you dont have a soul unless you find your special one the special one is forever you may think you found the one but not when they break your heart your soul is linked with him or her she is alwayz will be treated well if the special is befor her eyes I dont have one but two souls.

somewhat focused... yet alwayZ wrong... Climbing the walls...  Singing a song... Feel me reach... Wrists tightly bound... Tired of spinning round and round... The faster the spin ... The longer the daze... Hold out your hand... Head out of sand... suffering without breath... Begging to understand... If left alone... Future unknown... Help to bury... The demons that reside...
... Kelcee All

somewhat focused... yet alwayZ wrong... Climbing the walls...  Singing a song... Feel me reach... Wrists tightly bound... Tired of spinning round and round...  Hold out your hand... Head out of sand... suffering without breath... Begging to understand... If left alone... Future unknown... Help to bury... The demons i own...
... Kelcee All

so much for view counts...
when... you find... more pleasure...
sieving 2 tonnes of soil...
than... writing your abysmal best...
for some...
competition...
with... wait... who's in charge?
of the poetryfoundation.org?
well... old news...
willard bunn III...
    henry bienen... "resigned"...
oh now i'll be watching...
gone with the wind...
like some ******* secret a-class
*****... like some: ******...
like... requiem for a dream...
             like caligula in the face:
malcolm mcdowell...
i never liked: gone with the wind...
more a ben-hur fan...
barbara! oh... barbra: streisand! oosh!
and effect...
i'll be watching gone with
the wind till the wind don't take me
but lazy thames: might...
**** it... gone with the wind
marathon... one movie x 4...
will probably equal...
the whole harry potter and twilight saga...
well i don't think it's funny...
given... Hattie McDaniel...
nigh-eerie-***** was an uncle tom
after all... h'along...
didn't work 'ard anough!
cots the cradle and cotton the *******
spinning "oops"...
                    about time to stop caring...
i cared once...
bash up: prop'ah punk limbo...
   and the youth can read
the same trash elsewhere
on brick walls and their grafitti hierogylphics..
not mine...
oh sure... well... the movie film critics
were always...
not-circumcised ******...
hard to match up to a pleasing
palette of the aesthetically pleasing: prunes:
last sauced... for the edible...
   coz danzig and world war two
vil alwayz be like: whatz-everz...
             cotton picked: no coal mine: mined...
the slam dunk!
leave that to the slavs:
the albino nigh: oh gee...
no carry bone-ant-and-bean-pop do...
  paid for nothing:
kamikaze!

trying to write
trying to smile
trying to push through distracted by memories
Just Me & You...

It seems I've fallen prey to it again...
Recognized patterns of
behaviors, signs, actions
YES...  RED FLAGS!!!
Yet still blinded by HIM..

This kind of Love,
without a doubt,
Is what I imagined it to be like...
with My Soul Mate
Or so I thought...

Fun, exciting, spontanious, kind, humble, and romantic
Extremely intelligent,  plethra of music-
he loved playing DJ
Music brought us together, the lyrics are poems

My life is poetry...
Some dark some sad some happy some strange and some that just don't make any sense... cuz it's my life!!!

We talked and danced many a night and other times we both wrote poetry

We met at work and quickly became best of friends
We made a deal to work out together
He would train me
NO complaining or missing days
Otherwise that would be the end of us working out together

After six months
I reached my goal which made myself esteem Skyrocket since I was very depressed before all this

While doing laundry at my home walking up and down the stairs I used to mumble to myself "is this really my life, is this it"

We were happy hanging out, working together, etc.  (still just friends)
we started writing bikes, going on walks, and writing poetry

After six months
I reached my goal which made my self-esteem skyrocket, since I was very depressed before all this

We were happy hanging out, working together, etc.  (still just friends)
we started writing bikes, going on walks, eating healthy and writing poetry

partners for about a 1 1/2 yrs (only friends, that's all)
which made me feel safe but it also attracted me to him as well...

As is, all good things must come to an end
but this time,
it crashed into us
OR So I Thought...

Just as we were falling in love, only together a few months
He suddenly moved across country to  care of his mother

we stayed together
visited back and forth across country
for almost 4 of the longest years of my life

long-distance lonliness was taking its toll
I started a Blog called 'IMNOPENBOOK'
It posted song videos with lyrics...
As the songs played, I wrote poetry...
about my feelings...
Good, Bad, Ugly, Scary, Death, Hatred, Loss, Betrayal, Pain, Suffering, Grief, Regret, etc.
LIFE..

Over 2,400 poems just poured out
it was the emotional outlet needed to cope during a very difficult, emotionally dark period in my life...

Four years later back together, rented an apartment, got jobs, etc.
It was like we were in the honeymoon phase, just starting out our lives-what we've been waiting for all this time..
Things were going well
And we were happy for a long while...
Until We Weren't...

The time spent apart changed both of us tremendously...
By this time, were both  drinking heavily and using drugs pretty Often...
Some of us more than others...
Quite More!!!

We were not connecting, not coping with our own realities, self medicating just to get through the day

This is when the harsh truth began to show it's evil hand...

Two Alcoholic/Drug Addicts... emotionally/physically abusive, nasty, violent drinkers that led to domestic violence, police, arrests, court dates, restraining orders, jail cells, overdoses, hospitalizations, stealing, lying, manipulation, betrayal, loss, and in the end...
DEATH!!!

Out of the darkness
came sadness, shame, guilt, bravery, strength, and hope...

New Beginnings, lessons learned, mended fences, restored relationships, forgiveness of self and others

I cannot shake how I still feel such intense love and lust for HIM...
thinking dreaming missing him almost every single day
No regrets...

HE was the love of my life, a love-hate kinda relationship
When he was GOOD,
HE was very very GOOD...
When he was BAD,
HE was horrid...

'The Good outweighed the Bad'
Thats how I Justified it

If I had to do it all over again... theres NO doubt in my mind ...
I would change nothing

Those were some of the best years of my life with the man I love...
Always will love...
Alwayz in my Heart...
See you in my Dreams...

... Kelcee All