"affixation" poems
Beholden.
I am for a tainted past.
Years of scars.
Inwardly vast.
Recollected memories so brawn.
In my dreams.
They will never be gone.
At a time..
Feeling worthless...
Knowing now.
A test..
A test of hidden purpose.
Purpose that has given me preparation.
Inspiration.
Determination.
Motivation for a delightful future is now my affixation.
I am..
Beholden.
Dec 24, 2014
Dec 24, 2014 at 7:54 PM UTC
It starts with curiosity;
fascination,
admiration,
affixation.
Excitement and expectation.
Fondly falling for flutterings.
Paying too much attention to alterations.
Getting hung up on fluctuations.
It turns into frustration.
Feelings of inadequacy.
Indignation.
Self-abasement.
Fear and loathing.
Dread.
Followed by annoyance.
Re-evaluation.
Revulsion.
Remembering what's important.
It ends with indifference;
over it.
Free again,
thank goodness.
Dec 16, 2014
Dec 16, 2014 at 1:57 AM UTC
psycho-analyze-
I feel like I am dying
Affixation
I can not breathe!
Suffocating-
Drowning-
...breaths of air become fewer
And further apart.
No one even cares.
Denial---
Mismatched & misunderstood.
Stuck- trapped
Bound by my word.
Tears roll down her cheeks
as her knees hit the floor.
Paralyzed-
Fear and anger!
You're sitting to the right
Beside her
Yet it feels like
She's living with a stranger.
Misery loves to mingle---
Loves to be in your company.
To my dismay,
You obviously do not see
What one day will be---
something so foreseen, like that of a prophecy.
Fortune teller
Wanderer of the night...
Gypsy lady
Spawned from the original Wild Child
Who dedicated her bra... Stand up for what you
believe In.
Damn
Heathens.
How long must this drag out?
Time
is very precious.
Yes, I have acquired patience.
Refusing to bring an innocent soul into this-
Suspended animation and false fabrication
Of lies that are the foundation
In which your existence is created from.
So was mine. I will learn from
someone else's mistakes.
--to bring meaning for a foolish act once done.
Now it's justified.
The truth will set you free.
Why don't those words roll of my tongue,
as easily as the advice just was?
Now I am trapped
Now I am stuck in a rut.
Feels as if I have been punched in the gut. Sick to my stomach.
I'm signing off...
But not like that, not for like "forever."
Hey man, I think I'm getting better. Let's keep
that between, just you and me.
Nov 30, 2014
Nov 30, 2014 at 6:47 AM UTC
Cursed affixation
Taking in a drove of men
Who think they are above you
But somehow adore only you
And thinking maybe you’re in
On a joke that only you two know
Your wits supposedly matched
Your laughs the same horrible mocking tone
Your eyes faded in a facade
But the games are fun, aren’t they,
For an idiot like you?
Everyone hates the bully
Until you are one
And you feel the bitter tastes
Together
And you think you are a part of something
That somehow you two are stronger
Smarter
Better than before
But you’re both nothing but leaves
Destined to fall off and crumble
For the winds to drag you away.
These powerful pulls
To one another, and the filth
You both hide in
Triggers one to wonder how you can ever leave the cycle
Of the man who is a narcissist
Or the girl who thinks she is special
Because she is the only one he “respects”.
Take a walk
Break the false bond of strength
And realize that isn’t you
It doesn’t have to be you
Don’t make an addiction to
Addictive personalities
And let it soil the girl
Who wanted proper love
With a softer heart
Who sips quietly from life
On her own, safely;
She needn’t give another man
An ego trip
Because her fragile soul gives out
Too much love
And finds fascination in the grandiose self,
Something with a strong aura
But lacks true power,
Isn’t worth the degradation of yourself.
Love never hinges on something so broken.
Sep 16, 2018
Sep 16, 2018 at 11:14 AM UTC
why do i miss someone i never loved
all she ever was to me was a distraction
now it seems like she's more of an affixation
am i just jealous?
envious even?
she has a life
that i just want to be in
i could just chalk it up to lust
but then again she might think the same of me
May 18, 2017
May 18, 2017 at 6:52 PM UTC