Amongst the sapphire roses
The stems dance along the dust
That spreads on winds of you

Morning came like the past
Beating down a mountain valley
Conjuring up a lovers rally
Could we dally upon subtle dreams?
A kiss planted inside the skin
No makeup could change its view
A façade I bid adue

A world where you are you

And I
Loving the plum blossoms
That formed upon your skin
Nature causing beauty to be natural
Not transformed into potions
Built by peoples emotions
For we learned to love the river
A purest source of freedom
That drifts along your rivers roots
That I bloomed to love

You became nature
And I learned how to photograph with my eyes

The recipe to comply - oh how the Ingrediants are Ever So Rare.
As my journey proceeds on- Ill prove to accumulate
More and More As I live on,
With the Simplicity of my personal reassurance  
I bid you adue - Good Luck On That search
For The Worlds Most Rare Ingredients

When words fail me, turn me towards the skies.
Teach me to shine like the stars in the night
Maybe someday soon I'll bid you adue
Until such a time I'll rattle your cages and spit on your muse
I'll kick and scream and fight for eternity
Until such a time that I ponder your immunity.
Against an unholy guard and a trusted advisor
My love will be poisoned like the black nights armor.

I spoke with the Lady today. She said you were coming back. I won't work with you. I refuse to spend my time pining over the likes of you. I don't wish to see you everyday. However, I will not be responsible for your lack of employment. The destruction of all you hold dear, yes. But your unemployment, is beneath me.

"You was told wrong. I have a new job. I like it where I'm at."

WERE. You WERE told wrong. Good God man. Learn proper English. You owe me. If money is not in My hand on the 24th, I'll collect your teeth as payment with that pink shiny bat I carry.

"I'll pay you. You're dark and ****** up. So little and pretty. A Manson Barbie. You need medication you know."

*******. I want what's mine. It's unadvisable to be late. I'll send her every picture, every text. I'll knock on your door during family ******* dinner. No one wants that ****.

"I said I'd pay you back. And blackmail doesn't look good on you. You're insane. Seek help."

I told you I was insane from jump.

"I didn't think you was serious. Have you tried ******?"

WERE!! I didnt think you WERE serious! Look, as much as I enjoy this ***** fit argument, I have important business to tend to. Your gold tooth will look good as a charm on my bracelet, though I prefer silver. Don't be late.

"You're one f-ed up lady. I love you, you know."

Apparently not enough. I can't love. Not you. Not anyone. I gotta go. Until the next explosive ******* bomb, I bid thee adue.....

"

I say this now, for I havst not time left.
Not this fair night, in this night air, you see.
Goodnight, my love, for now I must go work.
School work, for there is much of it left still.
Adue, my darling, I must resume this
And you, surely you must resume your night.

(Tís Shakespeare my dear; rest well my darling.)

- Jay M
February 24th, 2020

Tell me something new
So tired of your almost truths
You make me feel alone
When I'm right beside you
So I will stand outside my home
And wait for rain
So I won't be alone
You'll show up like a dream
But that's the only way I'll ever see
Unless it rains your never there
All alone with no one here
I wish on all the falling drops
I didn't need you
That this could stop
But still I stand and wait for rain
Because with rain you'll save the day
I want you here when the sun shines bright
But you're only near when it's put of sight
So I'll pray for rain
So I'll see you
And once again you'll do nothing new
You'll cover my head
With the jacket that smells like you
You'll hold my hand
Then bid adue
Until the next storm
I won't see you

By; Breannah Cross

Memories haunt me.
The painful things of the past.
Memories are a stand still.
In time moving so fast.

The death the tears.
You relive them all.
I need my mind wiped clear.
It into madness I'll fall.

I don't wish to look.
I don't want to see.
To look back and remember.
What all has happened to me.

So ill seal them away.
Deep into my mind.
Never again to be seen.
By the likes of mankind.

But there not all bad.
Some I still hold dear.
Should I seal them to.
Because of my fear.

No I shall not.
I know what to do.
Separate good from bad.
And bid the bad adue.

dear josh
noble in all your words
i hope one day
your prayers will be heard
but alas
there is no body on earth
that will ever mean as much
as your kind words
if we meet again
it should not be with someone else's skin
so i bid you adue
until the night comes to an end

untitled part 2
                              
                            

Late at  night while I lay in my bed. I feel your warmth on and around my head. The way you would hold me, just as I fell alseep. A kiss on my brow, lips and then cheek. A soft whisper in my ear as you bid me adue. And when I awake in the morrow I realize I must live another day without you. Sometimes it hard to breathe, and you know humans cant live without a heart. They say everyday is a new journey, yet I dont know where to start. I dont want a new journey, I just want you here with me. And things will be so much better now, then when they used to be. I wish my thought could float to you, so that you could hear them loud and clear. And all I want to say is "oh how I love you"and "I wish you where here." I hold you in my heart but like I said it really not there, your gone now And its in much need of repair. Cant really do much with out you crossing my mind but I cant stay in that place to long, I break down everytime. But sometimes I think and some days Im cry, and my mood changes and no one understand why. As I go about my day I sware I see you everywhere, but then I have to tell myself that you are no longer there... well..... no longer here. Passion onces shared yet drifted away, for you to love me is all I want today. Its all I want tonight and the day after. I only see you in my dreams so I wish this day would go faster. Now im home once again and I lay in my bed  waiting for the moment your warmth touches my head.

scarlet hood
run
I’m trailing behind you
hide and seek
lets play
I catch you every time you run away
run little red
the wolf is coming
falling through space
I taste the atmosphere
closing in
I reach out
caught you!
falling
fall
fading away
will they ever find us
good bye little one
adue
I will see you with god

we will go through a scenario that I think we can both agree is realistic, which i hope doesn't state anything you don't see as true, but if you do, feel free to contact our support team after the activity. as long as you feel it doesn't detract from the point of the exercise, please answer the prompt it sets up to answer before correcting specific instances.

Premise:
do you understand how sickening it feels,
when mourning is a familiar agony
when you can feel it approaching and understand exactly what you're about to go through
it never gets easier
do you empathise
do you sympathise
do you understand how much i needed to talk to you last night.
and how okay i was to leave it for you to sleep
just so i could spend time with your unconscious breathing
just so i could have something
to cushion me tonight
even less than i take most nights

Everything I thought you knew (tell me where i lost the plot here):
I let you know ive had a bad day, one i could never unpack in just five minutes. maybe i shouldnt have understated things, but i really didnt want to pressure you into a long call.
i had happily agreed to have a quick call even though it had been so much
because i desperately wanted to call you which i clearly expressed and you even mocked the nature of (proof of acknowledgement).
and suddenly, id rather hang up for good.
you find out I just lost someone very close to me and my mom, and I thought would clearly understand the past few minutes in perspective now.
you knew i had lost someone
you thought i was upset
you say sorry
you send me instagram post
you act like everything has been nbd this is a conversation light and playful enough to have a b-plot
i confirm that you upset me
you say sorry twice each time followed by explanations for you on the call, which i have a completely different issue i havent even opened yet because thats not what ive been talking to you about. i dont get how youre acting so casually after ive told you ive lost someone very close to me.
surely im misreading things
you say "ive been pretty stressed to so it wasnt a good time for a call ( dont pretend this and "i misunderstood" and "it was really a mistake believe me" arent deflections, i had acknowledged that i knew it was a mistake, but was appalled by your judgement subsequent, ESPECIALLY after we'd just had a fumble where you were told I was VERY SERIOUS when criticizing your inability to take accountability, deflecting is not taking accountability because accountability requires understanding and addressing the problem at hand, see later paragraph)
this blows me away because how are you using your stress levels right now as a deflection
looking ME dead in the eyes and saying that was the excuse for acting so inappropriately.
I could never imagine being so inconsiderate and emotionally brain dead as to not get this. The lana del ray song is playing at full volume.
I don't know how I could ever let someone go to sleep like that,
how i could end a conversation like that. but you need sleep. i understand.
i say, yea sure ill just go to sleep like this, clearly showing that this was something painful but necessary,
you act like i am on pause
you act like my pain is postponed
until we speak in the morning
you say, goodnight :)))
you didnt get it
you didnt get anything

you didnt even listen to me when i told you you werent getting it.
why cant you just respect my emotions
why cant you trust my anger
that it cannot be extinguished with "it was a mistake"
why do you not hear me in pain understanding you caused it and feel no compassion
you feel guilt, sure, you dont like to hurt me of course
but no, oh tov im so sorry -> for your loss
(besides one you followed up with a frowny face and an instagram post which i think we both want ignore right now)
no, oh gosh tov, this is a rough night, im so sorry to leave you like this but i have to sleep.
no im sorry to cut off your explanation of the intense feelings i can see you're going through right now, but Tov I do really have to sleep
you say, But I am sorry (I was insensitive (on the call))
I say ok, goodnight
you say can we agree to carry on this exact discussion tomorrow? as if you've placed my feelings on hold
you say, Love you, goodnight :)) as if you've placed my feelings on hold

lets go over that one more time
Love you, goodnight :)))
you did not empathise with me once tonight
after what ive been through lately, i know what its like to be having a stressful time,
i offered to call you just to hear your story about what went wrong today because i know when ***** rough you offer to hear them out, at least thats what i do no matter how sick tired and mourning
i offered you more support for your stressful day
than you did compassion when i told you
i lost someone very close to me today
sorry
maybe it was my fault
that you thought that was a bigger deal

I just don't understand what was different today.
why we couldn't call while you got ready for bed.
I knew i got to my laptop really late tonight though so i thought not to complain.

and then i got cut off mid statement, so you could bid me adue,
bonne nuit! mon cheri! i love you! goodnight! :)))

i hope you slept well last night
i didnt
i dont understand how you couldnt even offer sympathy on that
not even a crumb

what possible reason this time,
do you have to not take accountability. dont mistake my hopelessness for insult, i beg you prove me wrong, i wish you could explain this away, i just dont know how likely that is.

how many times in one night can you avoid facing what you did and owning up to it. do you not feel shame for the disrespect i had to feel as i listened to you ignore my very serious requests you stop joking about my mom. do you not understand how mad i have to be to hang up after wanting to call so bad. do you not understand it is not appropriate to send instagram jokes and smiley faces when i am shouting extreme hurt at you.

i think you do understand
somewhere
but you hope its not like that
because that would be easier,
and so you choose to walk on the maybe its not a problem path
on the side of the path of least resistence,
to avoid. hope dumb
i dont do it like that. i cannot forget so easily.
every fallacy drives me crazy
when i act against logic my skin crawls.
and dont tell me im being illogical.
dont attempt to tell me im irrational
you can have a rational explanation but this is a rational understanding

god i hope you're just really stupid but i know you're not
we know you avoid apologizing intentionally, weather you want to or not may be up for debate but it serves you to play dumb

dont you dare play dumb.

i cannot speak to someone who pretends to be so ignorant as to have missed even half of this
so either admit to playing dumb or admit to being dumb
because no one, sick, tired, or mourning, would say
Love you, goodnight :))) after understanding what was going on.
and nobody but a man, even sick, tired, or mourning could miss that

so please, show me how blind i am. save this quickly
because life is a nightmare right now
because you will care for me to the ends of the earth
until it requires you own up to a simple blunder! an easy fix!
a quick one before the eternal worm
i dont want to be going through this right now
im sure you dont either
sorry for making you read a novel
can we please make up now