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"admiringly" poems
You paint me in the wrong colours and hold your art up to my face, claiming it's a mirror. And you're deaf to my silent protests; you look admiringly at your work and tell me "I know you"- you don't. We walk together down the corridor and I don't know what you're seeing but it sure as hell isn't me. You smile, smug like a cat, thinking that you've got me. (You haven't). And you think you know what makes me tick but you're forever trying to wind me up with the wrong key, and wondering why sometimes (when you look, when you really look) the hour hand's pointing out thirteen.
0
Sep 25, 2014
Sep 25, 2014 at 5:55 PM UTC
Your Confident Assumptions (Are All Wrong)
Driving thru lots of Parked cars, many un- Aligned... Ask you? Askew... Wow. There oughta be A law or two to keep Those cars in lines. (Let's get Google to Drive our cars for us! They'd behave better, Until they became self- Aware, that is) Googo- Pocalpyse Navigating parking lots is Gambling against heavily Uneven odds, the House(s) Eventually winning by de Fault of small electronics Merry Christmas! Used To hear that from just about Every mouth and furry pair Of lips. Now, the ubiquitous "Happy Holidays" or as Seinfeld So brilliantly mocked, "Festivus for the Restofus" The mocking is now Knocking on our Cultural Door to Heck Driving past a Fitness Planet: the misspeled Word "Judgement" And the irony poking Me in the eye is that little "E" That SHOULD belong nestled Snugly in the deep middle of That word, but, strangly, isntt... And I'm doing what that sign Admiringly attempts to cajole: I'm judging. I'm judgEing. I do this, constantly, all My waking minutes: Not passing on judging, but Holding 4 aces and 1 joker... (Me) Hands clenched in rage as (Again) I steer obliquely thru parking Lots, doing the very same Crime I accuse everyone else Being guilty of... I scream... THERE IS NO 'e' IN JUDGEMENT!
0
Dec 24, 2013
Dec 24, 2013 at 8:55 AM UTC
Judge Mental
When will we.. stop admiringly distantly.. stop posting afar, its impossible to try and reach a star, But I can certainly shout to the star above conversate with it show it love. In my heart and mind sparkly hype find.. share my thoughts all in the blind. A traveler at heart is mine.... I quickly rhyme... yet truthful a blessed find.. I'll leave and stray away.. keep my attention far at bay... Good day...hope you like it.. my paper plane.. sent to a moonlit sky.. Registered.. S.A.M _shardays_Copy Righted notes.
0
Jun 16, 2023
Jun 16, 2023 at 5:30 PM UTC
At a Distance (sky)
I feel my pretty child well Simply because there is a child inside me ... I feel every moment of my childhood Simply because it's a real thing ... I am still connected with my childhood's days Greatly and wonderfully Simply because I do not want to forget them ... I remember all those wonderful games I enjoyed with my playmates over there ... My mind stores all my Childhood's greatly and admiringly ... I live in my childhood and My childhood lives in me ... It's difficult to forget my pretty child Simply because if someone does not have A pretty childhood(past),then One's present and future will not be As great as one's past ....
0
Feb 6, 2015
Feb 6, 2015 at 7:55 AM UTC
In my childhood
My Night with Art Garfunkel some years back wrote a poem titled My Night with Paul Simon,^ so it seems that in time, this his companion’s piece would find me, reaching its own due date, the timing right, indeed, perceived, by the muses that this one, the poet who cannot sing, needs urgently another soft poet’s voice, to come to me at night, and so it came to pass last night a regaler, the teller of tales, both of us looking admiringly upon what was our youthful appearance that only we see in a vintage Murano mirror the where the why, no matter, just two NYC boys in their declining years reminiscing about growing up in Queens, telling tales with no need for exaggeration, too old for that, for old men lying is always sadder than sad and the truthful stories are not stories, but harmonies the voices are worn soft, the worse for wear, and the velveteen is two shaded where usage has reduced the weave, and sunlight has discolored but not discouraged the aging agents we exchange verses, the swapping of our ****** fluids, I do not share my prior pope paul adventure, a separate but now equalized recording he signs his new book for me, full of reminisce and new verses and I am thinking Art for art’s sake, or art for Art’s sake or both wistful higher and higher notes that can longer be reached of no consequence, for the body is the work and the work is from the body let’s take a selfie I ask, but a polite demurral hints of better a preference remembrance of things the way they were, in the past, but I snap a quick photo and it resides on a Facebook entry, unless the muses deleted it without telling me (which they do quite frequently, hoarding the best I made all for their elusives elfish selfish-selves)^^ Dec 5, 2017 10:20pm <•> ^ https://hellopoetry.com/poem/387251/my-night-with-paul-simon/ June 2013 ^^ https://hellopoetry.com/poem/747333/the-elusives/ June 2014
0
Jan 13, 2018
Jan 13, 2018 at 5:19 AM UTC
My Night with Art Garfunkel (a true story)
My Night with Art Garfunkel some years back wrote a poem titled My Night with Paul Simon,^ so it seems that in time, this his companion’s piece would find me, reaching its own due date, the timing right, indeed, perceived, by the muses that this one, the poet who cannot sing, needs urgently another soft poet’s voice, to come to me at night, and so it came to pass last night a regaler, the teller of tales, both of us looking admiringly upon what was our youthful appearance that only we see in a vintage Murano mirror the where the why, no matter, just two NYC boys in their declining years reminiscing about growing up in Queens, telling tales with no need for exaggeration, too old for that, for old men lying is always sadder than sad and the truthful stories are not stories, but harmonies the voices are worn soft, the worse for wear, and the velveteen is two shaded where usage has reduced the weave, and sunlight has discolored but not discouraged the aging agents we exchange verses, the swapping of our ****** fluids, I do not share my prior pope paul adventure, a separate but now equalized recording he signs his new book for me, full of reminisce and new verses and I am thinking Art for art’s sake, or art for Art’s sake or both wistful higher and higher notes that can longer be reached of no consequence, for the body is the work and the work is from the body let’s take a selfie I ask, but a polite demurral hints of better a preference remembrance of things the way they were, in the past, but I snap a quick photo and it resides on a Facebook entry, unless the muses deleted it without telling me (which they do quite frequently, hoarding the best I made all for their elusives elfish selfish-selves)^^ Dec 5, 2017 10:20pm <•> ^ https://hellopoetry.com/poem/387251/my-night-with-paul-simon/ June 2013 ^^ https://hellopoetry.com/poem/747333/the-elusives/ June 2014
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39
The planet it wobbles a lonely path On the background of distant stars So constant and locked into their relative places- They did seem so very happy. It leaves its solemn red footprint On the pitch black night The astronomer's eye is caught by a passer-by. Embarrassed at his distraction he turns back to his telescope And cannot see the faded mark it left behind Only the endless void And he raps his knuckles on the railing wondering what he had been looking for. And there is a glint of gold in the evening sky and blue smoke from a chimney-top And the sharp-dressed men and women in their black jackets Are too focused on the sidewalk Cracked, Beige-gray, It was recently cleaned for their viewing pleasure And it leads them to their cubicles and coffee-shops. And then their houses where they burn away the night in small silent hearths And awake again the next morning with each minute planned ahead Only to find out the schedule they had followed- and adhered to the entire day- Was not written for them or for anyone but just as another man's joke meant for nobody else to see The toil she felt in the armchair constructed, such a constant lock in place that she collapsed and they looked admiringly as she had worn herself out working hard at her job all day- And I looked at the map scrawled at my feet in a different man's handwriting "I'm lost," I said after a pause. "I do feel rather lost"
0
May 5, 2013
May 5, 2013 at 12:51 AM UTC
Stargazing
You, a prepossessing rhapsody beguiling in a sincere bursting my day with melody though you are in a silence It's such a pleasure to hold you, within an utter buoyancy with you, I am literally told not to rely on certainty You, a vivid exquisite I admiringly adore with such a solemnity.
0
Nov 20, 2015
Nov 20, 2015 at 9:09 AM UTC
You
I summoned the devil in all the coaxing dulcet tones of a lover to make a little trade. He appeared to reply in something sounding suspiciously like amusement that contrary to popular belief, he did not buy souls. Why, he wondered would he bother with such trivial humanities? so I plucked from my chest the thing in question that he might know there are not so many stars in the sky as neurons firing in my mind. and I showed him exquisite pain and deliriously beautiful sadness anger so searing I shook to contain it All the things a devil delights in cannot be felt so deeply as by a soul that has tasted misery again and again and lived to wish to tell the tale. He moaned in half-ecstasy tones thick with desire to name my price. I asked only for peace at last How cruel! he cried, not un-admiringly To make one long for something so desperately and name a price they cannot pay. For peace, he said Can only be found through one's own demons It comes from acceptance of one's self entirely; not absence. So I left, having wrung good advice from the devil himself.
0
Nov 15, 2015
Nov 15, 2015 at 10:11 PM UTC
I Guess No One Buys Damaged Goods After All
Once upon a millenium I  scrawled in awkward letters Straining for an undiscovered profundity Not so different From an upright creature Some ages past Who stroked upon An empty page With what he thought Were poignant truths And monumental metaphors Like uprights love to leave So as to titillate Their future discoverers While stretching unabashedly To be a candidate Future philosophers will doff With certain validation For unique truisms..... I am recorded here Wow, I said admiringly To myself In my true language Hey, dat's sump'm Eat ya heart out, Aris
0
Nov 10, 2010
Nov 10, 2010 at 6:39 AM UTC
I Am Recorded Here
My heart, Is a jigsaw puzzle composed of Pieces of souvenirs from wherever Life has taken me Sunny mounts of happiness, Dark troughs of gloom, Blind alleys of secret memories Punched out remains Of the parts that I gifted to Those special few Uneven buds added on To the surface, because some gave me Pieces of their hearts too Marks of where it was trodden on, Scars that show its Brave, healed face With pins of guilt and remorse Studding it in memory of how It also became the cause of others' pain That's my heart. Not so pretty, Not perfect, not pure, Yet it sits in my chest, beating away Patiently, as if entirely sure That any moment, its wait will end Of someone who'll admiringly Imbibe all of its stories, Ease away all the tense knots, View in awe all its glories And let its inadequacies depart, Completing them with closeness- Smoothening their unevenness- By merging with them, Heart to heart
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Apr 8, 2014
Apr 8, 2014 at 6:23 AM UTC
Heart to Heart
He has a smile that Mesmerizes, Carefully hiding The circles that form Beneath his eyes. He laughs like he Doesn't feel hollow inside But the sound never seems To come out quite right He lives Like the silver moon, In a midnight starlit sky. Faces stare admiringly Yet he always wonders why. He only sees the shadows Swimming before his face, Never the light that he emits, With unassuming grace. He longs for Constellations But I am just one fleck Of light amidst the darkness That wraps around his neck I feel his aching heart contract, Encased in ice and stone Oh, that I could be the warmth That he has seldom known.
0
Jul 4, 2016
Jul 4, 2016 at 2:53 AM UTC
Ice and Stone
I dream of you, gazing admiringly in my direction. I dream of you, hoping I will forever awake in your arms. I dream of you, smiling softly in your sleep. I dream of you and I, because in my dreams we live, in our own beautiful eternity...
0
Oct 28, 2014
Oct 28, 2014 at 10:46 PM UTC
I Dream of You.
Hair pony-tailed, tight up against my head Almost as snug as us, supine in my bed I am long past drifted Dreams in and out sifted Covers covered, pretenses shed A chill brushed over me, sleepily Eyes flutter open and admiringly I gaze at you curled up next to me Heart filled so full, busting at its seam You are peacefully breathing, this is no dream Blankets shuffled to your side Undesiring to wake you, I quietly confide "Baby, I'm a little bit cold" Your eyes pop right open and you promptly fold Me up in the blankets, you hold me so tight I wish this is how I could spend every night
0
Apr 3, 2017
Apr 3, 2017 at 10:22 PM UTC
04/02/17
the type of love where i catch you staring at me. longingly. admiringly. the type of love i can feel, not only hear. the type of love where i look over at you. my eyes become fixated. locked. my heart becomes warm. full. the type of love where i look at you. and i love you. i simply. i love you. you meet my glance. with no words. you love me back. you love me back. you don’t even need to say.
0
Sep 26, 2018
Sep 26, 2018 at 6:33 PM UTC
i love you.
As pleasant chatter echoed from within the coffee shop I lurched backward at the kick of a scorching cappuccino to my lips, Clumsily sloshing a few spiteful drops onto the beechwood table. Reaching sheepishly towards the nearest napkin, My gaze fell inadvertently in the direction of a Comely young woman sitting alone at a nearby table, And I immediately became possessed by her presence. My hands reached for my backpack in animation, Fiddling with the zipper and unearthing a spiral notebook, Flipping anxiously to a blank page on which to draw. It became apparent that I discovered a muse. With her hair hanging loosely in caramel curls, The girl stared at her novel in placid fixation, Delicately perusing each word in hopes of Absorbing each ambiguous connotation. My pencil scampered fervently while she flipped a page, Dipped her little finger into her petite cup, Mingling the whipped cream and murky coffee, And sampled her caffeine creation with a succinct sip. Though I toiled with haste in fear that her attentive eyes might Wander and spot me in my mad state of artistic enchantment, I captured every angle and curvature of my subject in my notebook, Once finished, I could not help but be in awe of the masterpiece I’d created. After a hearty slurp of my now tamed cappuccino, I held my drawing up to compare it to my muse, But to my astonishment, she had disappeared. Dainty fingers tapped friskily on my shoulder. “Well done,” the girl quipped, analyzing my work admiringly, Then snatching the notebook from my quivering hands And replacing it with a crumpled napkin on which she Had scribbled down the digits of a telephone number. “See you this evening. Don’t be late!”
0
Jun 4, 2016
Jun 4, 2016 at 4:55 PM UTC
Caffeine Creations
As pleasant chatter echoed from within the coffee shop I lurched backward at the kick of a scorching cappuccino to my lips, Clumsily sloshing a few spiteful drops onto the beechwood table. Reaching sheepishly towards the nearest napkin, My gaze fell inadvertently in the direction of a Comely young woman sitting alone at a nearby table, And I immediately became possessed by her presence. My hands reached for my backpack in animation, Fiddling with the zipper and unearthing a spiral notebook, Flipping anxiously to a blank page on which to draw. It became apparent that I discovered a muse. With her hair hanging loosely in caramel curls, The girl stared at her novel in placid fixation, Delicately perusing each word in hopes of Absorbing each ambiguous connotation. My pencil scampered fervently while she flipped a page, Dipped her little finger into her petite cup, Mingling the whipped cream and murky coffee, And sampled her caffeine creation with a succinct sip. Though I toiled with haste in fear that her attentive eyes might Wander and spot me in my mad state of artistic enchantment, I captured every angle and curvature of my subject in my notebook, Once finished, I could not help but be in awe of the masterpiece I’d created. After a hearty slurp of my now tamed cappuccino, I held my drawing up to compare it to my muse, But to my astonishment, she had disappeared. Dainty fingers tapped friskily on my shoulder. “Well done,” the girl quipped, analyzing my work admiringly, Then snatching the notebook from my quivering hands And replacing it with a crumpled napkin on which she Had scribbled down the digits of a telephone number. “See you this evening. Don’t be late!”
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32
HER LIPS SPOKE OF WISDOME FED BY SCIENCE BOOKS AND HISTORY TEXT AND PHILOSOPHY OF ASSUMPTIONS CARRYING A STRICKING EYE FOR STUDENTS THAT WON'T SIT STILL SHE CLAIMS SHE LIKE'S IT QUIET DURING FREE TIME OF READING BUT I'M STARING DOWN AT TEEN MAGAZINS CAUSE MICHAEL JACKSON MAKES ME SHREEK IN MY SEAT AND I SAY NOTHING NOR READ NOTHING BUT                                 STARE                                 ADMIRINGLY AT HIS                                  PUZZLING FEATURES THEN HER VOICE RISES OVER MY HEAD LIKE FLYING BULLETS MISSING MY BRAIN AND EYE SOCKETS BUT SHE PLUNGED INTO MY EARS LIKE THUNDER BULT AND LIGHTNING AND MY SEAT WENT HOT WHEN SHE STARED DOWN AT ME HER WORDS CUDDLED UP AGAINTS MY IGNORANCE AS I FIGHT OFF THE BALANCE SHE NEVER OBTAINED TO                                  MAINTAINE                                  MY ATTENTION                                                                   ONLY FEAR MY HEART POUNDING !!!STARTLED!!! AT  HER RATTLE SNAKE INTENSIONS AND HER VENOMOUSE WORDS FELL UPON MY LOW IQ SHAMED AT MY ABILITY TO LEARN EVER SO SMALL AND SHE COULDN'T MANAGE TO STAND UP AGAINTS MY DIFFICULT APPLE BITTEN BY SO MANY BITTEN AT THE BIRTH AND EATEN BY THE BEAST OF STUDENTS WHO STAND EGO HIGH AGAINTS ME TURNING HEADS AT ME WITH A GLARE IN THEIR EYE THAT ONLY HORROR MOVIES COULD DEPICT SHE DECIDED TO FAVOR                               THE WIDTH                                 THE DISTANCE AND                       THE RISK OF HAVING ME HER STUDENT...  AT ALL... AND TELLS ME "YOU WILL NEVER WIN, BUT I WILL" ?????????? WHY MRS. ANDERSON... WHAT EVER DID YOU MEAN BY THAT 23 YRS AGO I WANNA KNOW???????? BUT I COULDN'T CONCENTRATE OR PAY YOU THE FAME BECAUSE YOU STAND UP THERE LIKE SOME PRESIDENT OFFERING NO LESS THAN A TOOL I CAN'T GET TO A HIGHER LEVEL LIKE THE OTHER KIDS FEELING LIKE A ROBOT STANDING IN LINE TO EAT STANDING IN LINE TO PLAY RAISE MY HAND LIKE A CONVICT TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AS IF THIS WERE THE MALICHA OR A **** OR NOZI OR HOW EVER YOU SPELL                               THE **** NAME CAUSE IT AIN'T ENGLISH YOUR RING TONE PHONIC VOICE RINGS IN MY EAR TO THIS DAY AND YOUR PIERCING DULL BLUE EYES IS ALL I NEVER WANT MY CHILD TO HAVE AFTER ME A TEACHER WHO THINKS SHE IS THERE JUST TO BEAT DOWN A CHILD                                         IN THIER MINDS. © S.T. Rebel of Eden
0
Sep 14, 2014
Sep 14, 2014 at 11:12 PM UTC
MRS. ANDERSON
HER LIPS SPOKE OF WISDOME FED BY SCIENCE BOOKS AND HISTORY TEXT AND PHILOSOPHY OF ASSUMPTIONS CARRYING A STRICKING EYE FOR STUDENTS THAT WON'T SIT STILL SHE CLAIMS SHE LIKE'S IT QUIET DURING FREE TIME OF READING BUT I'M STARING DOWN AT TEEN MAGAZINS CAUSE MICHAEL JACKSON MAKES ME SHREEK IN MY SEAT AND I SAY NOTHING NOR READ NOTHING BUT                                 STARE                                 ADMIRINGLY AT HIS                                  PUZZLING FEATURES THEN HER VOICE RISES OVER MY HEAD LIKE FLYING BULLETS MISSING MY BRAIN AND EYE SOCKETS BUT SHE PLUNGED INTO MY EARS LIKE THUNDER BULT AND LIGHTNING AND MY SEAT WENT HOT WHEN SHE STARED DOWN AT ME HER WORDS CUDDLED UP AGAINTS MY IGNORANCE AS I FIGHT OFF THE BALANCE SHE NEVER OBTAINED TO                                  MAINTAINE                                  MY ATTENTION                                                                   ONLY FEAR MY HEART POUNDING !!!STARTLED!!! AT  HER RATTLE SNAKE INTENSIONS AND HER VENOMOUSE WORDS FELL UPON MY LOW IQ SHAMED AT MY ABILITY TO LEARN EVER SO SMALL AND SHE COULDN'T MANAGE TO STAND UP AGAINTS MY DIFFICULT APPLE BITTEN BY SO MANY BITTEN AT THE BIRTH AND EATEN BY THE BEAST OF STUDENTS WHO STAND EGO HIGH AGAINTS ME TURNING HEADS AT ME WITH A GLARE IN THEIR EYE THAT ONLY HORROR MOVIES COULD DEPICT SHE DECIDED TO FAVOR                               THE WIDTH                                 THE DISTANCE AND                       THE RISK OF HAVING ME HER STUDENT...  AT ALL... AND TELLS ME "YOU WILL NEVER WIN, BUT I WILL" ?????????? WHY MRS. ANDERSON... WHAT EVER DID YOU MEAN BY THAT 23 YRS AGO I WANNA KNOW???????? BUT I COULDN'T CONCENTRATE OR PAY YOU THE FAME BECAUSE YOU STAND UP THERE LIKE SOME PRESIDENT OFFERING NO LESS THAN A TOOL I CAN'T GET TO A HIGHER LEVEL LIKE THE OTHER KIDS FEELING LIKE A ROBOT STANDING IN LINE TO EAT STANDING IN LINE TO PLAY RAISE MY HAND LIKE A CONVICT TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AS IF THIS WERE THE MALICHA OR A **** OR NOZI OR HOW EVER YOU SPELL                               THE **** NAME CAUSE IT AIN'T ENGLISH YOUR RING TONE PHONIC VOICE RINGS IN MY EAR TO THIS DAY AND YOUR PIERCING DULL BLUE EYES IS ALL I NEVER WANT MY CHILD TO HAVE AFTER ME A TEACHER WHO THINKS SHE IS THERE JUST TO BEAT DOWN A CHILD                                         IN THIER MINDS. © S.T. Rebel of Eden
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94
The strands tangle and twist As if my finger, Is the center of a tiny universe Of interlocking twining twirling black With a simple twist and snap Are ripped, Star crossed lovers Every Romeo to his Juliet Are rip, rip, ri-torn apart The hair from the hair tie Yet, Like tentacles clinging on A stubborn slug, repulsive Yet in an obscure manner Admiringly persistent It continues to hold on Like a lizard regrows it’s tail Impossible, To truly chop off So too does the hair insist Upon an adamant refusal to separate As if hair and tie are one Interlocked In a ferocious battle... Or, Perhaps, a passionate embrace? Are they one? Whether it be so or not I decide not to bother Why, should I take up the mantle Of the evil stepmother, wicked witch, cruel king... You name it To separate the two, lovers or competitors They maybe Why insist, Upon what will never Come true, At least, In the case of any proper Disney fairy tale Is what I tell myself, throwing down the hair tie In favor of writing poetry about it
0
Feb 10, 2019
Feb 10, 2019 at 12:30 AM UTC
The hair, the tie, and Me
Devotedly loving, Admiringly honest, Deeply protective.
0
Oct 31, 2018
Oct 31, 2018 at 6:46 PM UTC
DAD
Lisa, a fellow freshman who lives in our neighbor suite, is a breathtaking beauty from New York - the kind of beauty that toppled ancient Greek empires - a sun-like beacon to the male *** Anna (one of my four suitemates) gasped and said, “The gods walk among us.” The first time we saw her at orientation. If Lisa lays in one of the hammocks in the quad to study - in minutes there’ll be 10 guys doing athletic male things like throwing footballs and foot juggling fobs - anything olympian and roughly physical to show off and draw her interest. Late one afternoon, Anna and I were studying and watching such a scene from a second floor patio garden. Sunny, (another of my suitemates) just returning from class, took in the scene. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. “Are you smelling roses?” Anna observed. “Better than roses,” Sunny said. Looking down at the preening guys. “They’re gorgeous,” she sighed, “Why can’t I have just ONE?” “They’re already entranced.” Anna said, peering over her sunglasses. “Awwww!” Sunny purred, “Look at the pretty one in the orange shorts.” “Too late, I said, “she’s already culled him out from the herd.” It was true, Lisa was slowly leading him away from the pack, spellbound. “She’ll probably eat him.” I said. “How does she DO that?” Anna asked admiringly. “I don’t think she even tries - it’s probably pheromonal.” Sunny said ruefully. Our envy isn’t raw enough to curdle into dislike - we agree that she doesn’t seem to TRY to be the center of attention - we just wonder where she finds the time for it all.
0
Oct 13, 2021
Oct 13, 2021 at 8:18 AM UTC
Lisa
Lisa, a fellow freshman who lives in our neighbor suite, is a breathtaking beauty from New York - the kind of beauty that toppled ancient Greek empires - a sun-like beacon to the male *** Anna (one of my four suitemates) gasped and said, “The gods walk among us.” The first time we saw her at orientation. If Lisa lays in one of the hammocks in the quad to study - in minutes there’ll be 10 guys doing athletic male things like throwing footballs and foot juggling fobs - anything olympian and roughly physical to show off and draw her interest. Late one afternoon, Anna and I were studying and watching such a scene from a second floor patio garden. Sunny, (another of my suitemates) just returning from class, took in the scene. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. “Are you smelling roses?” Anna observed. “Better than roses,” Sunny said. Looking down at the preening guys. “They’re gorgeous,” she sighed, “Why can’t I have just ONE?” “They’re already entranced.” Anna said, peering over her sunglasses. “Awwww!” Sunny purred, “Look at the pretty one in the orange shorts.” “Too late, I said, “she’s already culled him out from the herd.” It was true, Lisa was slowly leading him away from the pack, spellbound. “She’ll probably eat him.” I said. “How does she DO that?” Anna asked admiringly. “I don’t think she even tries - it’s probably pheromonal.” Sunny said ruefully. Our envy isn’t raw enough to curdle into dislike - we agree that she doesn’t seem to TRY to be the center of attention - we just wonder where she finds the time for it all.
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13
the type of love where i catch you staring at me. longingly. admiringly. the type of love i can feel, not only hear. 
the type of love where i look over at you. my eyes become fixated. locked. my heart becomes warm. full. the type of love where i look at you. and i love you. i simply. i love you. 
you meet my glance. with no words. you love me back. you love me back. you don’t even need to say.
0
Nov 23, 2016
Nov 23, 2016 at 3:22 AM UTC
this is our love.
Yiska wants to slit wrists to shove handfuls of pills down her throat leap from the ledge of the ward window bang her head against the door frame until her head bleeds I am not shocked I have an underlining admiration of her dedication to death of some sort don't suppose you have a razor blade? she asks no they don't allow those in here I say we have to use the well used electric one she walks across from window to the door of the locked ward I walk beside her I'd mouth pills if I could get any she says locked up I add she pauses I could try hang myself from the pipe in the bog like you did she says but all cords or belts are now confiscated once in here and the nurses watch you like hawks some look like hawks she says I notice her anxiety it sits in her like a possession like a demon has taken over her don't the pills they give work? no she says walking again twice you tried that she says hanging in bogs what is the thing about bog hanging? I don't know the solitude of the place no one there with you I was just lucky that old boy noticed and called the nurse lucky? Yiska says well that time else I wouldn't be here talking to you or the second time attempt she says we stop by the window and stare out at the snow on the fields and trees kind of pure isn't it I say unlike me she mutters it's cold out there fancy getting out and lying in a ditch and wait to die of cold she shivers her pale blue nightgown moves her unslippered feet look innocent as children there's always ECT I say she looks at me didn't work just a fecking headache afterwards she says me too I say she peers at the snow I read somewhere of German soldiers freezing to death in Russia during WW2 some standing up solid she says almost admiringly but I’m locked in here not out there she puts her forehead on the window pane I can smell her perfume musky but out of place and a haunted look on her young pale face.
0
Aug 7, 2014
Aug 7, 2014 at 2:23 AM UTC
YISKA AND SNOW AND ME.
Yiska wants to slit wrists to shove handfuls of pills down her throat leap from the ledge of the ward window bang her head against the door frame until her head bleeds I am not shocked I have an underlining admiration of her dedication to death of some sort don't suppose you have a razor blade? she asks no they don't allow those in here I say we have to use the well used electric one she walks across from window to the door of the locked ward I walk beside her I'd mouth pills if I could get any she says locked up I add she pauses I could try hang myself from the pipe in the bog like you did she says but all cords or belts are now confiscated once in here and the nurses watch you like hawks some look like hawks she says I notice her anxiety it sits in her like a possession like a demon has taken over her don't the pills they give work? no she says walking again twice you tried that she says hanging in bogs what is the thing about bog hanging? I don't know the solitude of the place no one there with you I was just lucky that old boy noticed and called the nurse lucky? Yiska says well that time else I wouldn't be here talking to you or the second time attempt she says we stop by the window and stare out at the snow on the fields and trees kind of pure isn't it I say unlike me she mutters it's cold out there fancy getting out and lying in a ditch and wait to die of cold she shivers her pale blue nightgown moves her unslippered feet look innocent as children there's always ECT I say she looks at me didn't work just a fecking headache afterwards she says me too I say she peers at the snow I read somewhere of German soldiers freezing to death in Russia during WW2 some standing up solid she says almost admiringly but I’m locked in here not out there she puts her forehead on the window pane I can smell her perfume musky but out of place and a haunted look on her young pale face.
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113
A friend made me remember a serious fact That I'm usually bringing up the suffering of the past I really needed this advice to wake me up After I suffocated myself and ******* me up I was hating myself for no reason I actually did to me such betrayal and treason The happiness left me since years ago Stupid me I thought I just need to grow But after time my dreams began to blow Hearing an advice, such as take it slow I couldn't bear my curiosity to know What fate and destiny may show I realized the truth at a late time After I lost many dear people and my life's prime I was living every day the same way trying to achieve fame Hoping to hear people call admiringly my silly name But I'm glad I'm still at the mercy of my god Since I can reconcile with myself and make my family proud Even if the critics of people become very loud I will be patient and work my way even in a huge crowd
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Feb 26, 2018
Feb 26, 2018 at 7:54 AM UTC
My repentance
Lizzy, my dearest love story My first love full of endless symphony You and I shared a unique chemistry A jewelry that spaerkled beautifully You were, loving you was my sweetest melody Your smile melted every sorrow uniquely Admiringly, even through adversity Your love brought sufficiency My dearest mummy Sadly, the illness grew alarmingly And the future became seemingly Thinner and vanished with an obituary It's been five years since you passed on At first it was hard to move on But with God I managed to stand strong With a woman of my own Who's been there all along I've never felt alone Except when I visit my former home Lizzy, I miss thee Truthfully, I love you endlessly And I miss you dearly Yours truly Your son Chris, you're missed daily
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Feb 8, 2019
Feb 8, 2019 at 1:59 AM UTC
Lizzy