#workaholic
You wake up.
Immediately, you check your phone.
The amount of things to do is unbearable,
But you have to get it done anyway.
Why?
You don't know.
You start doing the work by yourself,
No one there to help you yet.
As always.
You have to do everything alone.
Why?
You don't know.
You finish the work
And you feel empty.
You HAVE to do something, anything.
Why?
You don't know.
You're completely burnt out,
They ask you if you're okay.
You're not.
Why?
You don't know.
Jan 1, 2025
Jan 1, 2025 at 8:33 AM UTC
Colour-coded lists
with satisfying check marks
Tally for self-worth score
Free time is a dead wasteland
Work compulsion conquers all
Work is my saviour
Proof that I have use
Grateful for the gift
of structured daily toil
I don’t need a break
I am far too strong
I am made to stand
in any roaring storm
Endlessly on point
I cannot relax
Maybe I should take
a class in calming down
Another degree
Major in stillness
Minor in poems,
music, walks and gardens
What happens to me
While I do ‘leisure’?
What will I be worth
when I take time for me?
When days are rough at work, and heat is high
My self-esteem is carried by a role
To prove each working day that I am fine
And value comes from actions to assist
At frantic pace that slowly dents my soul
Beware when job and self strong-overlap
Identity is blank beyond my job
Then molehills swell to snowy mountain range
Allotments to sheep stations in my mind
And working day and night a sleeve-worn slog
Befogged in role, befuddled in self-worth
In muddled shame, obscured by guilt and fear
With added slow fatigue and hopelessness
And where do your needs end, and mine begin?
All rules of world and life become unclear
Learn to take time off
Negotiate with myself
New type of self-worth
Creative time, open field
Discovery nurtures all
Nov 23, 2024
Nov 23, 2024 at 1:26 AM UTC
With Goal in the mind
you focus your card,
Forgetting days nights
and working so hard,
What ever has come in
the target your way,
You have always strived
to keep it at bay.
Resources are albeit
but skimpy and low.
You Seldom get worry
and never you bow.
While eating and moving
or going for walk,
You put your attention
on measures you talk.
Virtues that you own
not common in mass,
Seldom are found and
tough to surpass.
Perhaps is the reason
why I have regard,
Your focus certainly
deserves this reward.
But often I doubt
your fire your zeal,
Queries comes to mind
this what I feel.
Is it your passion that
makes you work hard?
Or Else is pushing you
jumping the yard?
Since I have also seen
a victim a prey,
In forest jumps hard
when lion on way.
Just see if guilt,Fear ,
doubt and remorse?
are not controlling
your action of course?
Ajay Amitabh Suman
All Rights Reserved
Dec 11, 2021
Dec 11, 2021 at 9:46 PM UTC
Hi, you have reached the voicemail box of Syreena Phelps. I am either working, sleeping, or too depressed to answer the phone. Leave your name, number, and a reason for me to live, and I'll get back to you as soon as I am mentally able. Thanks!
Jan 28, 2021
Jan 28, 2021 at 2:48 PM UTC
Between judging the good and the dead,
I lose myself in the cacophony of lies, made my men,
Amid the hustling and jostling of interests, lies and deceit
I scream!
my voice is muffled by a black cloth,
which covered eyes of Themis, now unfurled, tied my voice,
So, none can hear, my cries,
I am a man, I have a spirit, my bliss cannot live in lies and deceit!
I lose myself, split of a second,
A place where I find solace for my heart,
Split second of servitude for God,
And that is enough! To lead me away from temptations!
I look at men in blood, fresh, for petty wealth, and I see God!
I look at black coats, standing for Good and evil for wealth, and I see God!
Who am I to judge?
I see and witness unfurling of time, and my mind rests at His foot!
For all is lights and shadow!
I am at peace, being a witness of His work.
Om Tat Sat!
© Saurya 7th Jan 21
Jan 7, 2021
Jan 7, 2021 at 1:47 AM UTC
I like being busy
There's no surprise in that,
It's the only way to survive and make the voices quiet that argue in my head.
I like being busy
It's the only way I've known,
To burry down those feelings
That keep on surfacing on their own.
I like being busy
I enjoy being burnt out
Because that's how I muffle the agony from the bleeding cut.
I don't want a moment of silence
Because that's when
The voices in my head are
The loudest.
They Mourne, they agonize, they miss,
They sympathize.
And then all I have is this burning feeling which is
The darkest.
Dec 20, 2018
Dec 20, 2018 at 3:15 PM UTC
Trapped inside her mind.
There are a million different doors.
All of them are locked.
None of them can fix her catastrophic thoughts.
Only she knew the extent of her limitations.
But she didn't want to disappoint, so she kept on doing more.
All these tasks pushed her past her breaking point.
Little did she know,
Kindness was the poison rooted deep inside in her mind.
All alone.
There she goes.
Watch her soul float away.
Now she no longer feels any pain.
Dec 2, 2018
Dec 2, 2018 at 10:37 PM UTC
That workaholic lady who's always on call,
keeping up with the market fall.
That newly married lady with chunky red bangles,
returning to her father's big castles.
That person who's scared to get lapse,
so stays active on the google maps.
That person who swings like a kid at the back door,
Or the one who perform calisthenics on an empty floor.
That next door girl with a red lipstick,
flicking her shinny hair & gossiping with her clique,
That dreamer gazing outside the window,
That overworked soul dozing on his elbow.
That 21st century kid,
listening to Eminem & playing video games.
Or That 90’s kid,
listening to Jenga Boys & playing outdoor games.
That banker with a big fat stomach,
filled with his beautiful wife’s love.
That lady who eats like a thief,
in her big fat bag hiding a beef.
That old man who can’t stand Bombay's winding turns.
That granny spotting & criticing every fashion trends.
That man who has Raju Rastogi’s concerns,
thinking & chanting for earns & returns.
Those kids who believe their job is to fill the voids in a battlefield,
in the still crowd surpassing like electrons into a magnetic field.
That lady sitting under cold seat like a glacial,
than standing with 7kgs in a crowded central,
& tryna stay sane listening to George Michael.
That geek who switchs from Linkedin to Arjun Reddy,
when the masses flee into the scenery.
That trader crunching numbers so rapidly,
when the stock prices go down hourly.
That person on the last seat,
diagressing from work & gazing around,
soaking in her pashmina, with a career newfound.
Jul 23, 2018
Jul 23, 2018 at 1:35 AM UTC
Tonight i'm so tired
That i let out a loooooonngg sigh
And let a tear fall
Sep 28, 2017
Sep 28, 2017 at 12:17 PM UTC
Sheets of white piling up on my desk
Red alerts with red flags flooding my mail
The little ping, ping, ping of incoming messages from various correspondents
Demanding my attention
"You should learn to say no; stop doing everything by yourself."
Once, my insides would clench and I'd feel like I'd been
Kicked in the shin whenever I see something that reminds me of you
But now, search as I might, I can no longer see your face
Even down memory lane, you've vanished as suddenly as you did in reality
Other events flow like running water, with the clarity of a clear lake
Yet when I try to recall the words you said
It was as if a mischievous kid decided to mess with the tap
On; off. On... off. On... off. On; off.
A buffering in my mind like chopped up notes of a song when a video wouldn't load properly
1991. 9893. 0306. 162. 0341. Numbers are all I remember.
How did
Your smile look like?
How did your voice
Sound like?
I stare at the excel sheet I've been populating
I stare at the values I've been entering
One after another, work requests come
One after another, the traces of you go
Apr 2, 2017
Apr 2, 2017 at 7:47 PM UTC
Harsh unyielding sunset, buries me against the page.
I won't be lazing on a couch, left to rot and waste away.
Wormy plush Berber carpet soft against the afternoon.
Debts are pile high and the company picnic is this June.
The pages are vellum paper covered in ancient Egyptian script.
I've loved you methodically ever since we met inside that crypt.
The dregs brings me solemn hope that one day we'll breakthrough.
Works calling in on Sunday for some overtime that's overdue.
Its a 5 past 4 the glass lays arrhythmic, shattered at my feet.
We found each other down beside the casket of the diseased.
Heartfelt words never came out of a mouth that were so pure.
How could you take me for interesting, in life I'm just a bore.
Down. I've already ruined the letter meant from me to you.
Life is not a fairy tale to broker marriage for us two.
Bloodletting's an aphrodisiac to keep me at the brink.
Why'd I write this silly thing when I spilled my drink.
Nov 23, 2016
Nov 23, 2016 at 2:55 AM UTC
I've never Skipped rocks
Nor made ripples in a pond
Never paid attention to the bees in the garden
Nor the ants marching in unison
Never stopped to smell the roses
Nor stick my toes in the sand
Never gazed at the sunrise
Never awed at the sunset
Nor have I ever been spellbound by the stars perfectly positioned in the heavens
Never went camping or pitched a tent
Never show my anger
But somehow I always vent
Now I look back in my haste
I wish to regain the time I've waste.
©La Vida Love
Oct 30, 2016
Oct 30, 2016 at 4:49 PM UTC
He; inexhaustible yet exhausting,
Ruthlessly efficient yet demanding,
Hard working yet withholding,
Barbed
Yet deemed necessary.
Protecting that which
Long ago was made sacred;
The heart, the hearth, the home,
None may touch that hallowed ground.
Defence was needed
Safety paramount
And then...
The years passed...
This ninja warrior endured
Defended
Sliced, hacked, diverted, whirled in endless pirouettes
Of engaged battles
Of mesmerising movement
Of unrelenting actions
Of no consequence
For the mighty goal of protecting
That
Which
Was now all but forgotten.
So effective was his defence
Of the thing called 'home'
That it was hidden from all view
Forgotten
Beneath his whirling dexterity of projects and activities.
The years passed...
And there was no home.
Never did the warrior stop to question his task
That old old command.
He simply obeyed
As a warrior should
And continue
Until his death
To protect the property of his master
The result
a hollow, busy, lonely life,
Punctuated by exhaustion
And the question....
"What's missing? "
But so complete was his defense
So skillful his guard
That none saw what lay beneath.
Too mesmerised by his motions to see that
He was but a distraction
A diversion
From the question which would strike such fear into his masters heart
"What will happen if I stop?"
Sep 2, 2015
Sep 2, 2015 at 1:43 PM UTC
She wins...
She always does
After a long busy stay
From missing her all day
I go home to her
And she's there, she's always there,
Patient, soothing and tender
Luring me to bed...
As I fight her charms,
Trying to stay up; workaholic impulse raging!
I win...
For a moment or so
Daring to focus
For a couple more hours
Desperate not to give in
At least not without a fight.
She peeks out from our bedroom
Sneaking up from behind,
As I snooze momentarily
But I can't win this fight, there's no use trying!
Accepting defeat, I embrace her
Letting her caress me
She entraps me all night
I'm lost, against my will
I know I'll wake up guilty,
Wishing I could send her away
But I'm stuck with her for life
And she takes so much of my time
Time I could use for work
But no, she won't let go; not when I always yield!
And no, she's not my wife
She's not even my girlfriend
Not some girl from across the street
Just a nobody, named Sleep!
© Raphael Uzor
Mar 8, 2014
Mar 8, 2014 at 9:26 PM UTC