#unchanging
I was able to fool myself there for a little bit
The fraudulent thought was constant
However, my penmanship captured a consistent internal beratement
But every new piece is the same 'ol shiit
It just pours out different
Duplicate content no matter the faucet
But it's only ever water coming outta the spigot
Forming from the origin of a recurring script
With only a singular way to interpret
You're only going to get one thing from an unchanging mindset
Just gets reworded before print
"Maybe they won't notice it"
"If I rearrange it it'll at least look different"
But the retreating interest is evident
Leading to the realization that was destined to hit
"They've found my secret"
"This pony only has one trick"
Should have paid closer attention to it
I lie and say it's wit,
Which I know is bull shiit
Because I couldn't and wouldn't argue if you called it redundant
The absolute of my failure is pungent
On my best day I'm still repugnant
Any new muse goes out of its way to be absent
Mostly due to the subject,
That's me,
Becoming complacent
Setting anchor in what was my escapement
Befriending my replacement
I wouldn't suggest it
But I ate it
So now I gotta ingest it
©2024
May 18, 2024
May 18, 2024 at 1:42 PM UTC
from old unchanging darkly grasped
in story unfolding and the yet untold
but ear strays and heart schemes
the old unheard and story unchanging
Jun 28, 2022
Jun 28, 2022 at 11:25 PM UTC
How can I change for you?
I won't even change for me
I don't change for anyone
I'm unchanging
Apr 20, 2021
Apr 20, 2021 at 10:27 PM UTC
I see so clearly now
That I've had some time
Living in a separate realm
Somewhere I cannot find
Do not know where your mind is at
Only focus on one thing most of the day
Where do your thoughts go when you're well?
When you're high and your problems drift away?
I long to know where your heart goes
Often it runs somewhere far
It's there more than here with me
Some distant planet or star
To follow is my desire
Where my hands can reach
With not just physically
Aim to practice what I preach
The way you turn emotions off
Only a moment of dissent
Has me hiding so maybe you won't see
A thick yet transparent loosely guarded discontent
Cried many tears for you
Added up and washed my sight
Point of view began to change
Presently I realize that it wasn't right
The way life lived day-to-day
May not have noticed back then
Should have noticed a lot sooner
Of your flaws
It was easier to pretend
Well guess I should regret that now
A few years down the road I will
Hard to explain
Despite all the games
Do it all again for you still
You and I have something unique
Heart has never felt love this strong
Blind I may have been when we met
Still feel your arms are where I belong
To say I love is an understatement
Blame cupid
Making me fall
Maybe Aphrodite
Or St. Valentine
Has me heeding to your every call
Maybe it is the universe
Pushing us close with an invisible force
No cause for my attraction to you
Guess destiny is just running its course
Your behavior proves to be unchanging
Lose more you each day we make it through
More than 1/2 of your presence
Need to have all of you
Nov 16, 2020
Nov 16, 2020 at 5:59 PM UTC
Excerpts from the Journal of Dorian Gray
by Michael R. Burch
It was not so much dream, as error;
I lay and felt the creeping terror
of what I had become take hold . . .
The moon watched, silent, palest gold;
the picture by the mantle watched;
the clock upon the mantle talked,
in halting voice, of minute things . . .
Twelve strokes like lashes and their stings
scored anthems to my loneliness,
but I have dreamed of what is best,
and I have promised to be good . . .
Dismembered limbs in vats of wood,
foul acids, and a strangled cry!
I did not care, I watched him die . . .
Each lovely rose has thorns we miss;
they ***** our lips, should we once kiss
their mangled limbs, or think to clasp
their violent beauty. Dream, aghast,
the flower of my loveliness,
this ageless face (for who could guess?),
and I will kiss you when I rise . . .
The patterns of our lives comprise
strange portraits. Mine, I fear,
proved dear indeed . . . Adieu!
The knife’s for you.
Keywords/Tags: Oscar Wilde, portrait, Dorian Gay, journal, ageless, face, youthful, unchanging, rose, thorns, ***** vat, acid, acids, dismembered limbs, violent beauty, knife
Apr 3, 2020
Apr 3, 2020 at 3:55 AM UTC
Trees turning late September
Leaves nosediving the ground
I know I should be changing too
Think as evening comes around
Fighting my shifting demons
Dropped to shaking knees
Autumn's knife struck my heart
Chill spreading like disease
With eyes shut in cold apprehension
Underneath a waning moon
Dreams
Sunshine
Disappear and are replaced
By fear of Winter coming soon
Wrapped tight in blanket of desperation
Colors switch to dull from bright
The nights steadily grow longer
See less and less clinging daylight
Making pathetic attempts
Lift myself off the floor
To transform like the weather
Wishing to not be the same anymore
But heart remains frozen solid
The months continue on
Seek a metamorphosis
Still meet resistance each dawn
Temperatures decrease little by little
Doubts and insecurity rise
Avoid facing the bitter wind
Everything in nature dies
Animals go into complete hiding
Have to admit I relate
Sleeping in to escape the world
A way I also hibernate
I try climbing towards my goals
Instead like seasons dizzily Fall down
Stripped barer than naked jagged branches
Forced beneath icy feelings to drown
Frost covers each surface
Departs as morning wakes
Dew remains as evidence
Like shavings after erased mistakes
Not long until snow layers earth
Buries all white touches
I couldn't bury flaws as well
Bad habits caught in my clutches
I stand rigid as an anchor
Though it might sound strange
Time ages all surroundings
Somehow I don't change
Mar 24, 2020
Mar 24, 2020 at 4:20 AM UTC
Beauty of the moon
Lady of the star filled night
Sunlight does display
Though its true form and splendor
By its phase remains unchanged
Apr 23, 2019
Apr 23, 2019 at 10:48 AM UTC
the days have been silent
the nights grown longer
the mornings are murk
the afternoon sears
as days are as dragging as nights
out the window the colors are dull
but in this room no color appears
and in these thoughts are cages
the rooms sound way better than
where am i now
my own consciousness hinders me
my own consciousness hinders me
Feb 12, 2019
Feb 12, 2019 at 1:43 PM UTC
The gentle spring breeze kisses the blades of grass
Streams humming like a whispering melody
Life blooming in all its mysteries and curiosities
It filled the meadows with a calming harmony
Standing on at a crossroads, I tread carefully,
A man past his prime, Indecision takes hold of me
The pain of youthful love burned out all my passion
Heading carefully to where I want my rest to be
On this hill here beside you I have longed to rest,
Under the warm rays of sunlight, with the sweet-smelling grass
Under the vast sheet of starlight, when night blankets the sky
Only beside you is where I want to forever stay
Memories of our youth come surging like a flood
When love burned bright and you give me life
When sorrow took the best of me, I grew hopeless
And when I needed you most, Death took you from my arms
Yearning for love, a passion that burns out the soul
I longed for one to come my youthful heart’s way
Etched in it an undeniable desire to fiercely fight
For a love that engulfs one’s heart like a wild flame
And there it was, a point where everything changes
When it came rushing in and crushed all my defenses
When hearts come in resonance with each other
Their melodies harmonizing like two spirits merging
Young hearts come together like buzzing bees
Looking for a love like there’s no tomorrow
Lit up with a sense of passion one rarely sees
Only to be consumed by inevitable grief and sorrow
Ah! Youthful love, it burns bright yet brief
When a heart is consumed, it is doomed to fall
For when it gives its all, it is surely to get less
And when it endures, it hollows out the most
Every heart has to endure a whirlwind of emotions
Fear will come to dread it and Hate will try to **** it
A gentle insanity comes rushing in, a craze-driven passion
In which one leaves reality to run and find a dwindling ideal
The troubles of a young heart are wide and vast
Its innocence unable to shield it from heartaches
And as winter approaches, it is also forced to choose
Lie still in the snow, or endure waiting for the next spring
A love that’s taken and tested to endure
A love that is fought for and is let to consume
A love like that, I still pray to hold within my grasp
And so for that love, I must endure with all my might
A soldier in this war, I fought for the comfort beside you
A lover in this struggle, I loved you much more than I can give
And when my lips touched yours, my words become silent
How you bewitched me with your beauty leaves me speechless
But Reality is a cruel master, a monstrous fate
When I felt like I could conquer the world,
When I felt that forever in your arms I stay
That is when he breaks me hardest, deepest.
Death is an all-consuming enigma
He came to take you away from me
Like a thief he came when least expected
When our flowering lives bloomed brightest
I am left to question all that had happened
Crying out to the heavens day and night
But the beauty you embodied had taken a new form
A form only Life can recreate once more.
You became the grass, you became the earth,
You became the gentle wind that comes in springtime,
The wind that kisses me with passion and gentle caress
When every time it whispers your voice is all I hear.
On this hill where your spirit resides
I long to be in your comfort again
Time has aged me, but not my love for you
Youth has passed me by, but not the feelings you left me with.
Wait for me beloved, my time has come,
Final breath draws near, Death follows behind me,
He who took you away now brings me closer to you
Stay steadfast beloved, today I’ll come to be with you.
Feb 7, 2019
Feb 7, 2019 at 12:12 AM UTC
Over the years
I know I've changed
But my memory swears
You remain the same
Aug 15, 2018
Aug 15, 2018 at 6:07 PM UTC
As my body lays frozen over
By the ice that continually cools me,
I gently float, soundlessly in the
Tower surrounded by icy waves.
The landscape that I always look out to
Is unchanging and lifeless,
Sounds in the distance seldom
Resounding around my heart motionless.
I kick at stagnant air,
Almost as if something was there,
The tunes playing in my head
Enough for my heart and mind to share.
As my frozen body moves,
I continue to gaze out towards the landscape.
Not because the landscape is motionless,
But now, because my heart and mind
Have melded into the tunes
Playing in my head.
Jul 18, 2018
Jul 18, 2018 at 9:21 AM UTC
Drifting away by the stream of thoughts,
A painful wind brushes through my skin,
Gathering pieces of time while still clinging on,
But I can't save them from spilling and vanishing,
Ah, phantoms.
I can't move, my motions are restricted by my cut off conscious,
My mind is empty, there is no thought, no judgement,
But I can't leave you here, even if I become as mindful as a little rock,
Perhaps it has been decided, under the clouds that this should have been so all along, but even then, with my never changing life I can at least keep shining for you,
After overcoming even time and space, may my gaze though fraught with the most terrible sins, lead you on to happiness,
But it seems like your brilliant smile just now turned to ash,
As then spilled but vanished just like the time we spent together.
In the end I couldn't save us from drifting apart,
Was it because I couldn't see into your heart?
~ Umi
May 16, 2018
May 16, 2018 at 10:48 AM UTC
Unwavering I stand before the onslaught of decay;
A gust of wind will wear me thin;
and the downpour of rain will leave streaks across my cheek;
But I am unchanged;
I dare not make a move, for if I take a step I'll crumble and fall;
But today I am myself and shall not change until I turn to dust;
I am a man set in stone;
Silent and motionless;
Apr 15, 2018
Apr 15, 2018 at 1:35 AM UTC
did you use your
credit card today?
does your card
have a chip?
in the time it takes
your card to process
i have ample time
to look out the window
i look out the window
a lot and i'm sick
of looking out the window
and if every time i
looked out the window
i wrote just one line of text
pretty soon i'd have a novel
i'd better do something
because i'm sick
of looking out
that same old window
Oct 3, 2017
Oct 3, 2017 at 5:06 PM UTC
~~¤~~
You are every word I put
In this jar of lines that I keep for so long
Like every breath that I breathe
And every single beat of my heart
You are the wish of forever
The moment I stare up to the sky
And wait for a shooting star
Or just look at those stellar bodies
Find the most radiant of them all
And uncover your eyes in it
Like staring at me soulfully
I hear your whispers in the wind
And even in the drops of water
Like the rain that washes my spirit
Or the sound of the waves
That always echo on the walls of my soul
Like those children playing
At the back of my mind
You never leave me in my dreams
Your touch always comfort me
With those words I need to carry on
You are my song
Your words, my melody
You are my song
My love forever
~~¤~~
Dec 13, 2015
Dec 13, 2015 at 8:16 PM UTC
Climate will change, yes
Weather is never the same;
But His love remains.
Jan 12, 2015
Jan 12, 2015 at 5:56 PM UTC
I've written a thousand rhymes
to tell you how much you mean
to me.
I've scribbled a hundred pieces
of my weary heart on the pages
of my diary.
I've missed a lot of moments
and chances to fall in love with
reality.
I've often tried to stop and let go,
I didn't know I would feel this
empty.
If this is so wrong for me to say,
I'd even speak more and
clearly.
If loving you would seem to the world the worst nightmare,
I'd do everything to sleep for
a century.
These are all that I'd love to do
if only I hadn't wasted
so much time.
But to hold on to these things,
even as a dream,
would be such a pathetic
crime.
Dec 25, 2014
Dec 25, 2014 at 9:10 AM UTC
You do know
that I will grow
and evolve
without you?
Do you know
that you’ll stay behind
and be all alone
as you’ve always done?
Nov 22, 2014
Nov 22, 2014 at 5:34 PM UTC
How about distribution,
Another ******* poem To and About "love," and aspirational ***
Lip metaphor:
A thick paperback flipped through both covers in a momentary fluttering; I love that sharp sound.
Can we break the law a little?
The one that we made without words, and no acknowledgement was needed.
-So we'll only break a few,
The one that keeps our lips apart; our individual pages each being read one sentence at a time, maybe passed around the party to obtain a variety of opinion for the same smooth structures.
So needy for an affirmation, you, all of you, all of us.
All of Our ******* lovepoems and lovers. Misery a lot-
Don't pretend you arent enjoying it, you masochists, writers.
About ***
Take them off, just take them all off-leave no room to guess, I will not dare aspire toward my fiction.
Or else leave them on, and sit here, and lay here, lie here, sleep here, wake here, leave here unviolated by my hands-but keep yourself dressed.
Oct 14, 2014
Oct 14, 2014 at 12:34 AM UTC