#troubled
With the sun's rising
comes a renewed sense of hope
in man's troubled world
_____________
Apr 4
Apr 4, 2026 at 7:20 AM UTC
All the things i did in school
Alway made me look a fool
I no longer have the energy to go along
They try to teach you to believe
By always trying to deceive
Christ i got so tired of that song
So you head out on your own
Determined to make yourself a home
And surround yourself with people you hardly know
They’re just lonely for a friend
They won’t love you in the end
And pretty soon you find out this is so
The wolds is such a lonely place
The winds of change all in your face
The future a dark place beyond the dawn
Honey i’m comin home
But i’m not sure anymore where i come from
I'm not sure anymore where I come from
So I’m all alone tonight
creeks are rolling down my cheeks
And a heavy world of pain
Stacked up on my chest
Honey in a world without you
All i do is fall
I don’t think that i can do it
I don’t think that I can do it after all…
May 5, 2025
May 5, 2025 at 8:05 PM UTC
So, within the crowds of people and chaos,
It was your face that I vaguely remember.
I think it was in Winter or around December,
If I Recollect correctly, it was probably November.
You were walking through the Crowds, so tall and so lean,
A crafted work of art, so unreal as it might seem.
It was so noisy, that I was lost in my own thoughts.
The expression on your face, was worried and distraught.
I remember it like it was just yesterday
I was wondering if your are Okay?
you seemed to be troubled by something
you just went on your Merry Way!!
To this Day I remember,
how you made an expression on me.
I just wished I could have known what was wrong
You are nothing but a Faded memory
B.R.
Date: Unknown
Jan 7, 2025
Jan 7, 2025 at 9:40 PM UTC
The Garden
As the Parent stood looking out the window
At their beautiful young daughter playing in the garden with a friend
They could only marvel at what they saw, a Beauty so delightful, so vibrant and alive
Dancing about, so light of foot and with a laughter so carefree
So youthful and so radiant looking,
And when she smiled it was like she smiled with her whole being
From somewhere deep deep down inside her...
"O! Youth, wondrous youth and innocence", thought the Parent, "such a beautiful time and a beautiful sight to behold
Untouched by this world, all her skies, they were blue
A darling child facing out into a loving abundant Universe"
The Parent smiled and nodded their head
All was well yea! All was good in the Garden.
The Tree of Good and Evil
But then there came a day when the daughter approached their parent saying
"My friends they all have phones so they can keep in touch with one another, and they can play their favourite songs, I feel a bit left out, I'd love to have a phone too"
Now the Parent could never refuse their lovely daughter anything
So a few days later they presented her with a brand new sparkling phone (just as she had wished)
She was thrilled, this lovely new shiny thing in her hands, this wonderful new toy... plaything
"Now I'll be able to keep in touch with my friends and play my favourite songs" she enthused
But then the Parent introduced a note of caution, they said "You must be careful, there are dangers...dangers out there
They told her of some websites they knew calling them"healthy wholesome sites"
They warned "Stay on these sites, their good safe sites,
Don't stray!... Don't stray onto the Internet!!"
The daughter was a little perplexed by this, she wondered what 'dangers' were
This was something new to her innocent mind.
The Fall
Now the Parent had to go away for a few days on a business trip
When they returned they hastily dropped their bags in the hallway
And rushed again to the window, rushed to see the one they valued most in this world
The One they loved above all... their most precious daughter
What they saw though sent a cold chill through their heart
For there was a difference now, a noticeable change in her
No longer was she fleet of foot, now they detected a hesitancy in some of her movements
And her laughter too, had changed, now it came only in short bursts
Not the lovely rippling giggly carefree laughter of old
There was also a pensive air about her, something which hadn't been there before,
And for someone who used to like their time spent alone
Now she seemed to cling onto her friends more
As if now she was afraid they might leave her
As if now she was afraid of being left alone with herself.
The Parent grew worried watching her, so they went out into the garden
"Daughter!", they said, "Is there something wrong ?" Are you not well?"
The daughter's eyes were downcast, it was like she was almost ashamed to look them in the eye
She nervously fingered her phone in her pocket
And then she said something... something strange, not like her at all
She said "The Planet... the Planet is dying"
"What!", said the Parent, "who told you the planet was dying, who told you this ?"
She went on "And there's Bad men with terrible weapons, there's wars! diseases!! famines!!! "
"Who told you all this ?" again asked the Parent, "who told you ?"
The daughter took out her phone and looked at it rather guiltily
She said "One of my friends showed it to me on the Internet"
The Parent said "We warned you Love, we told you to stay away from the Internet
The Parent then bent down and looking their little daughter in the eyes they said
"Sweet darling child , don't be afraid ! You were made pure...pure and strong, invincible in the face of this world
You mustn't fill your mind full of these dark things
These dark black clouds that will only block, clog up your beautiful skies
Dim the radiance of your magical radiant life"
But the daughter she replied almost resignedly "I know now that before when I was happy I was just living in ignorance
I know now this is how people are meant to be... and to feel. I feel I've grown up now".
As she turned and went back to her playmates the Parent thought sadly
"Now she'll have to decide, to look within, to find herself again...to regain her old self...her old smile
Or else, more dangerously... she'll have to wander...to seek outside".
Dec 12, 2023
Dec 12, 2023 at 4:51 PM UTC
Y'know the way music Bands like to look cool and dark and mysterious
on their album covers
Well I had an idea for an album cover for an
imaginary music group/band
It'd be set in a toilet factory (of all places)
So there'd be all these toilets fresh off the
production line
And the lead singer would be sitting on one toilet at the front with a grumpy
frustrated look on his face
As if he was really constipated (now it'd be all done quite decorously i.e.
they wouldn't have their pants down)
Beside him sitting on another toilet would be another Band member with a
big broad grin on his face as if he'd just done a nice healthy ****
Behind them would be another Band member standing up looking down into
one of the toilets as if he's just seen something weird
And lastly there'd be another Band member and he'd have one of his legs and
foot actually stuck in one of the toilet bowls of one of the toilets.
It'd be a debut album named after the Band itself
And the Band's name would be
"The Undecided"
Mar 31, 2023
Mar 31, 2023 at 5:58 PM UTC
I was caged with darkness
Anger was my only friend
My enemies were the ones who couldn't tolerate my friend
There was no good me
There was only the impatient, aggressive and troubled me.
I hated many with passion
and expected good things to come my way
I was lost
Feb 4, 2022
Feb 4, 2022 at 12:55 AM UTC
When worries surround
me like a pack of wolves,
O Poetry!
I turn to you like
a smoker turns to a cigar,
Like a drunkard sips
the last bottle savoring slowly
escaping the misery of day-to-day life,
I come to you dressed like a
passenger
to travel far away evading
my present life.
Oct 21, 2021
Oct 21, 2021 at 7:44 PM UTC
You're troubled, I know
You have a tough time opening up
There's a lot of trauma you suppress
I wanted to fix you though
I wanted to give you the world
I wanted to be the reason you could see things in a different light
But you ran away
You ended things before we could've grown together
You ended things before there could have been an "us"
You removed me from your private story
You don't talk to me anymore
And I hate it
I know you have no one to talk to about your problems
I know the people in your life don't understand you or care
But I do, and I always will
Jan 20, 2021
Jan 20, 2021 at 9:53 PM UTC
I exaggerate everything.
The pain under my eyes.
The strain in my muscles.
Every time, it’s a unit darker and heavier.
There’s a relief; a moment of ecstasy,
In over describing things.
I feel real.
A bubble of air sits in my veins.
It stings.
It burns in the gaps.
How do I honour it?
I try.
Every time.
With a unit darker and heavier.
Nov 4, 2020
Nov 4, 2020 at 3:35 AM UTC
the pulsating rhythm feels dead
it moves and yet it stops
it dances and yet it cries
it sways and yet it breaks
the maroon skies and sunflowers
the one that i always dreamed of
how can i reach you?
how can i be with you?
the yellow seems bright to me
i am with you but i realized i don't want you
my heart feels so far when i'm with you
my dream is far when we are together
i just want to be free here
i want to chase you, badly and endlessly
even if it pains me a lot
even if you reject me
i want to be there
i want to see the sunset with sunflowers at my sight
i want to feel the euphoria in my eyes
even if it is a deadly sight
if you are not for me
remove the thought of you in my existence
please leave if we will not meet each other
because i always want you, even at the ends.
Oct 21, 2020
Oct 21, 2020 at 5:57 AM UTC
Mama, this is your black sheep
In this life that you have given me
There is sadness and misery
I can hear you whispering prayers for me
But I can also see you very clearly
Deeply regretting giving birth to me
Mother, this is your wayward baby
I’m sorry that you can’t understand me
The state of my hair or the clothes I wear
The fact that I’m never really there
“Always living life without care” you said
But I swear I’m better off elsewhere
Birth giver, this is your son of a gun
Your boyfriend has always made me feel
Unwelcome and emotionally numb
I left home so you don’t have to sleep alone
But since then my heart has turned to stone
And my mommy issues are starting to show
Jun 18, 2020
Jun 18, 2020 at 1:50 PM UTC
___________________
another mourning morning, usual signs of warning,
wanted to wash away the distress signs of no sleep,
turned on the tap, out came only troubled waters,
my only friend, the voice from the mirror, pretending
to be coming from me, speaking: Oh Lord, Oh Lord!
*is there no surcease for me, somewhere, can I find,
little bites, small plates, pieces of peace, the kind
of kindness that eases, repairs the dividers of mind,
the country stone fences that been growing wilder,
when, troubled child of 10, window breaking, beyond
youthful mischievousness, evil streaked, so deemed*
Give me a boat, give me a bridge, give me a road, a home,
one of those things poets, songwriters about, wax lyrical,
Oh Lord, give me time, 45 seconds, even two or three,
Being strong, being confident, am I not entitled to that,
a boat, sturdy mast, cause sailing from storm to storm,
just glimpsing dry land, is that too much, a pale beyond?
love, nah, a bridge too far, not even on the menu, not blinded,
I am off key, not well enough, between the peaks between,
*I am out of sync, bubbling discombobulated, a **** besided, behind,
lend me a finger, not even a hand, a kernel, not even a cob,
a string, forget a rope, a washcloth to bathe and dry,*
lay me down, lay me down, to live, even just not dying.
Jun 16, 2020
Jun 16, 2020 at 1:08 PM UTC
Dragging herself out of bed
She stared at the damp grass ;
stared at the dew that seems to hold
unto the leaf of grudges.
Sipping in the freshness of the day,
a normal day for some ;
a lifetime darkness for her.
She who locks anxiety in her tiny chest,
kept piling up the bricks,
and created a wall of nausea.
She met her demons on a quiet suburb,
wanting them to stay -
for she was high on negativity.
Jun 6, 2020
Jun 6, 2020 at 8:58 AM UTC
there’s a lot of things
drifting in my mind,
and the right words to justify them
I can’t seem to find.
there's a lot of questions
with answers I have yet to seek,
I see choices around
but troubled to pick.
then there's this heart and mind
which quarrels every time,
now lost in thoughts
I'm torn in which to side.
Apr 9, 2020
Apr 9, 2020 at 11:27 AM UTC
Do I love them?
Or do I need validation for my poor choices.
Loving seems so hard
when love doesn't seem to come to you first
engulf those mirrored possibilities of who comes first.
Can I get to the finish line when I'm stuck at the start.
Apr 8, 2020
Apr 8, 2020 at 11:29 PM UTC
You know you can tell me,
all the troubles you encounter,
when the voices getting louder.
You know you can tell me,
when the wind is ripping on your sails,
and you just need to exhale.
You know you can tell me,
all you ever need,
so you can proceed.
Dec 14, 2019
Dec 14, 2019 at 10:08 AM UTC
I’ve Got A Guilty Heart and a Texas Troubled mind
looks as if I’ve won the losing lovers lottery twice,
had me the bonus number, now my silver buckle,
getting an overdue shine-up, my heads getting full
of regret and wondering, so my Daddy’s Stetson 6.75 size
nowadays, fit real tighter over my piled-up cowgirl braids
got excuses plenty, none worth sharing, none,
that’ll change nothing, two hearts continental drifting,
and with all the lyrics I write, got not a one about
how we let each other get away, the jukebox playing
Dixie Chicks “Cowboy Take Me Away”
think I’ll cover it in my next set, he will be sad down in Brownsville,
me, be traveling-singing in a dive bar up near Amarillo, no body
will be sad for me, no cowbodys posting no videos, no telling then,
but I’ll chance it, he will never know, cause I don’t want to
make him swollen sadder than he be already
somebody says god made country songs so sad so the world
could knowing-nod, been there, done that, in case company
might make you feel better, but it don’t till I right the wrong,
till I write the lyric that won’t explain much, but me, taking
the rightful blame, living with a guilty heart & troubled heart
me, way up north, but not so far away, still in Texas that’s for sure,
for the heart has a range finder that knows the GPS of where he be,
and the exact distance between us...
—-
“*I've got a guilty heart
And a troubled mind
No matter where I go
You're never far behind
I'd like to think
That you've forgiven me
But forgiveness ain't enough
To wash my conscience clean”*
lyric from “Not Cause I Wanted To” by Al Anderson / Bonnie Bishop
Nov 2, 2019
Nov 2, 2019 at 4:51 PM UTC
This is all there is to me
Boredom, disappointment and debris
This is all I am about
Rudeness, deafness and bad snout
This is all I can provide
A few thousand grave warnings to mind
This I can assure you of
In a week you'll have enough
Sep 10, 2019
Sep 10, 2019 at 7:02 PM UTC
Why are you so sad, dear?
What burdens tug on your heart?
Draw tears from your kind eyes...
Why are you aching?
I can feel it in my soul
You’re not well, my love
Come here
I’ll hold you for a bit
Wrap you in a warm embrace
Feel the consistency of my heart
Feel the strength in my arms
Let me carry it all for a stretch
You don’t have to do it all alone
Though I know you can, my warrior
But I can't watch you do this
Destroy yourself
Slowly, subtly
I've noticed
And it makes me very afraid
Despite what you believe, darling
You are really quite lovely
Your presence a treasure
You are exquisite
Sweetheart, just rest for a bit
Can you do that for me?
Sit with me
Tell me everything on your mind
Release every tear you've been hiding
I'll just listen
I'll just be here with you
Until you're alright
Jul 19, 2019
Jul 19, 2019 at 7:54 PM UTC