#thanksdad
You used to be my best friend,
now its like i never existed.
I used to be your best friend
now its like you never existed.
Thanks for the help dad
i try not to be mad
but knowing you choose
drugs, Burglary
living on the streets
Over a relationship with me.
makes me wonder
why I'm not good enough..
You don't even have to give that up.
Just wish you'd call and say what's up.
Do you sleep peacefully?
Is there any guilt or remorse
when you think of me?
do you even realize
what you did to me
when the personal creator
who birthed me
Tragically departed the earth early
only two weeks after turning 18.
You were nowhere to been seen
searching for your teen.
Her heart
she let open bleed
at that fateful scene.
But if you're wondering,
I'm alive and occupied,
attempting to mend
These shattered dreams of mine
I don't despise.
But I do wonder why
I was a sweet young girl
taking on a new lonely world.
You'd be proud to know,
i conquered it great
with no supports
and did what it takes
to adapt and outlast.
Forced to mature too fast
i forgive as a daughter,
but as a father
i can never understand
abandonment as your plan
thus forfeiting
being a man.
Grieving you,
but your not dead
Your lost in your head.
Eighteen -
supposed to be
when my life started..
But everything i loved,
departed.
Grieving a mother
Wondering
what happened to my father
Its not fair to me,
nor to the men i meet,
that i want them to fill the emptiness
that you could easily complete.
I run when I feel love.
I'm terrified to open up.
For they may take it and run
I will do me.
You do you.
Once i fully make peace with the truth
I can be the me
that was free
and full of life
before you disrupted my upbringing
------
Now I'm 28.
I've processed the pain
And I'm done playing
the waiting game.
I no longer wish for you to care.
To be there.
I accept what is here.
Ive had many nights
Where I wasn't alright
Flashbacks arrive
The little girl
wonders why.
But, I did something different this time
As I seen her in my brain
I allowed the pain.
Drop out of my mind
And into my body.
Experienced fully.
Hyperventilating,
body convulsing
Hardly breathing
I finally let my body feel
the pain I felt was real.
I never allowed it.
So I never healed.
The inner child,
She had to die
So I can mature
And start to raise
my standards high.
1/3/26
Jul 16, 2025
Jul 16, 2025 at 4:00 PM UTC
He sent his Son,
his Word,
A gift from above,
His message is Love.
Thank you dear Father,
Thank you dear Mother,
Blessing all people,
Our sisters and brothers.
The Word that heals All.
I took his yoke
it's easy,
He is the Way, the Truth, the Life,
Healing the pain,
let go of all strife.
.
Nov 16, 2020
Nov 16, 2020 at 3:15 PM UTC
// Not really a poem, just sharing my experience, I guess //
I really don't know,
How my dad found out about my poems,
Maybe he went through my files
and read most of the collections...
Going through my stuff is
something he has never done before,
but on reading my poems,
He said to me,
' *To many broken-heart poems,
saying the same thing,
about the same person,
How long do you plan to
be this way, lost and messed up??* '
and I said to him,
' Dad you wouldn't understand '
Well he left me with that,
and he went to office and I to school,
but later in the evening,
he held out a box,
It contained a watch,
The brand name was Fastrack,
and the tagline went as, Move-On!...
I made a poker face
and told him,
' *I see what you did there dad...
your puns are more killer than my poems...* '
and he told me,
' *Your poems are pieces of ****
you are still young* '
And I said again,
' *You wouldn't understand, Dad...
Don't call them pieces of **** '
and then he interrupted me,
saying ' When I was your age....
and I won't tell what happened next,
just that with that classic line,
came in more puns...
but in the end, he told me -
" *You are not the only one who has gone through all this **** "
and with an expression I would call rather weird,
he exclaimed...,
" *Her lips tasted of wine,
and soft hazel were her eyes...* "
but I interrupted him in between,
and went shouting,
" Mom, Mom!!!.... "
and he behind me,
screaming,
" Wait, You Hypocrite !! "
Jul 29, 2015
Jul 29, 2015 at 6:41 AM UTC