#sensitivecontent
Why do I do this
Why do I do this to myself
I see you moving on it hurts
I want you back in my arms again
Even though you left me paralyzed
You see me as a friend
I see you as a life I'll never have
I try make amends
But you push them away
Leaving me in pain
I don't know why I try
I just think I'd rather die if I can't have you by my side
Lately I've been feeling all alone
cause you left me broken
Yea I still have my soul
But it doesn't replace your love
Why do this
Why do I do this to myself
May 27, 2020
May 27, 2020 at 5:01 PM UTC
How could you do this?
How could you do this?
Now I don't mean to come off like I'm obsessing about you
But I obsessively obsess about the things I've done
Remember back when I said I'm sorry?
Told you I felt like a drain
Told you I felt like I cause pain
Well now I'm back again
Let me apologize for apologizing
I don't really think before I say stuff
You probably gonna look at this like "this *****
But that's okay I don't really need your opinions, I'm growing up
But I need to know
What I do wrong?
Hey, hey, hey!
What I do wrong?
Ye I know I apologise alot
But that's just my thoughts
I know I can be kinda obsessive and possessive
I know I can be kinda emotional
I know loving me can be a struggle
I swear I'm getting better though
Got a therapist and I'm getting back on my meds
Maybe they can fix my head
Maybe they can get rid of the dread
Maybe they can explain why I want to be dead
This isn't a pity party
I'm just telling you what's going on inside of my head
Hey, hey, hey!
What I do wrong?
Remember back when you said you loved me
Said you weren't ready for a relationship
But you could own me
That made me feel kinda funny
Like I was just a little play toy
Like I was nothing more to you than a quick fix
I see you got a new sub
I still hope they'll be better than me
I still wish nothing but the best
But I gotta know
What I do wrong?
Hey, hey, hey!
What I do wrong?
Sometimes I wish you'd leave me alone
But then you message me and I just can't let go
See you feeling kinda depresso
Hit you up like "hey, what's wrong, can I help you?"
I guess that's just my deepest fear
That I can't save you
I think it comes from some previous life trauma
Think I'm afraid to loose
Cause I lost my mama
Not to death but to my self hatred
Hit her up like
Hey, hey, hey!
What I do wrong?
May 27, 2020
May 27, 2020 at 4:59 PM UTC
I don't know why I can't, seem to find happiness for myself
I've tried so hard to love
But I always push away
Afraid to get attached
It hurts deep inside, feels like I'm dyin'
But I mask my feelings
Pretend to be happy all the time
I'd give anything to be content
**** I hate this feeling
The dread inside
Drives me to suicide
And I don't wanna let you go
So the only way is to die
I'll dig my own grave tonight
Burry myself
Then I'll be free from the thoughts inside
May 27, 2020
May 27, 2020 at 4:58 PM UTC