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#screamed
the world screamed at me as if that’s what normal people do. but I’m normal… in my own crooked, holy way. yes, I behave like a clown and when you ask me something, my head drifts up or down, my fingers wander behind my ear, and I whisper the answer like a shy prayer escaping a broken saint. I never stand in the center of wisdom I prefer its edges, where the winds of souls still carry secrets. leave me cracked, leave me luminous I was born from a delicious sin, a spark the angels couldn’t quite categorise. I’m not normal to you, and I don’t fit your mould. good. moulds are for statues, not for wanderers of the heart. I’m me unique… wild… unrepeatable. this is me.
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Dec 6, 2025
Dec 6, 2025 at 6:00 PM UTC
LOL
i cared too much about you to let you go i cried for hours i screamed your name until the ceiling cracked and fell on me i knelt in the shards of a roof and cut myself with them until grief ran in red rivulets it wasn’t fair, was it because it also wasn’t your fault it was mine too, there’s blame to share
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May 26, 2025
May 26, 2025 at 8:49 PM UTC
i screamed your name until the ceiling cracked
Shut up, I screamed to my mind only to realize I just woke it up.
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Jan 18, 2019
Jan 18, 2019 at 11:35 PM UTC
Woke
I wrote a poem for my biography to a special person about Adam, I thought you would like to read it. Blue Heart You were 18, so many years in front of you. It felt like a dark eternity, you didn’t want to go. I saw it in your sunken eyes. The vacant stare and sad dark eyes. I saw when you were sitting around the table prom night. So much going around but you were too calm too collected. too inside your mind for us. I knew that blank expression from experience All too well. You screamed for help silent and loud I reached for your hand but you f e   l    l You were poised and calm Broken but full of love. All I wanted to do was help you. you were standing still when the world went on and it did go on, it did, without you. When you were standing there at the edge I wondered about you, all in my head. We were short lived, a friendship that was fast. You came, changed me, then you left. it came and went in a flash. I knew when no one else could guess. you put it all on me, didn’t you. but I was not cross with you. Heartbroken, yes scared, yes alone, yes mad, no Your color was blue Blue heart, blue veins Blue is the color of our planet from far far away we wore it proud it was all for you, a blue solemn silence. and the world spun fast and all the people hurried fast, real fast and no one ever smiled. You weren’t all there, in that head of yours. dark and empty you were sad but you lived like you would die tomorrow tomorrow came too soon and it was up to you. it was always up to you. Meeting you was bitter you put me through stress, anxiety and heartache you put me through shame and shock All I wanted was you by my side, and you there was not. Meeting you was sweet you gave me smiles and laughs, good music and thoughts you gave me a feeling of friendship and care. All I wanted was you by my side, but you were not there. You were poised and calm, you rubbed off on me. I was hyped and excited you called me “ADHD” You drove an old red beater with water bottles everywhere, with **** in the glove compartment. but you didn’t care. Your drove with sunglasses and the FM radio loud. You drove in silence, thinking no doubt. You loved the sun but you would hike for the shade when we were together you took me away. I didn’t think, I didn’t have nerves. We talked about the world We talked about life You had a life you thought you didn’t deserve. Whoever planted that seed had some **** nerve you wrote like me but I wrote for myself you wrote for us when there’d be nothing else. I knew when no one else could guess. you put it all on me, didn’t you. but I was not mad. Heartbroken, yes scared, yes alone, yes mad, no When you were gone I read and I read i wanted to know exactly when you felt what you felt. You called me your jav friend you called me your angel You are up there watching over me I yelled and screamed I couldn’t breathe. I shut them out, I cursed at you. I hated you I cried for you I only see you in my head Dreaming once and a while of your smile, of your eyes but they are never dark they are never sad they are never empty The vacant stare is not there. your hair is a giant mess and I freeze that moment right there. You said you were alone you said it was a secret you asked me about my darkest and you told me all your secrets I have never been in that much peace knowing I kept you there It felt like moments when it was hours and you were gone too **** soon. tomorrow came too fast and it was up to you. it was always up to you. Now I wear a band on my wrist and pray for your peace that is all I have left, but you mean so much to me. I hope you are happy, I hope your journey has ended and you found what you wanted My heart was once broken but soon if all this is true it will be mended.
0
May 27, 2014
May 27, 2014 at 1:27 PM UTC
Blue Heart
I wrote a poem for my biography to a special person about Adam, I thought you would like to read it. Blue Heart You were 18, so many years in front of you. It felt like a dark eternity, you didn’t want to go. I saw it in your sunken eyes. The vacant stare and sad dark eyes. I saw when you were sitting around the table prom night. So much going around but you were too calm too collected. too inside your mind for us. I knew that blank expression from experience All too well. You screamed for help silent and loud I reached for your hand but you f e   l    l You were poised and calm Broken but full of love. All I wanted to do was help you. you were standing still when the world went on and it did go on, it did, without you. When you were standing there at the edge I wondered about you, all in my head. We were short lived, a friendship that was fast. You came, changed me, then you left. it came and went in a flash. I knew when no one else could guess. you put it all on me, didn’t you. but I was not cross with you. Heartbroken, yes scared, yes alone, yes mad, no Your color was blue Blue heart, blue veins Blue is the color of our planet from far far away we wore it proud it was all for you, a blue solemn silence. and the world spun fast and all the people hurried fast, real fast and no one ever smiled. You weren’t all there, in that head of yours. dark and empty you were sad but you lived like you would die tomorrow tomorrow came too soon and it was up to you. it was always up to you. Meeting you was bitter you put me through stress, anxiety and heartache you put me through shame and shock All I wanted was you by my side, and you there was not. Meeting you was sweet you gave me smiles and laughs, good music and thoughts you gave me a feeling of friendship and care. All I wanted was you by my side, but you were not there. You were poised and calm, you rubbed off on me. I was hyped and excited you called me “ADHD” You drove an old red beater with water bottles everywhere, with **** in the glove compartment. but you didn’t care. Your drove with sunglasses and the FM radio loud. You drove in silence, thinking no doubt. You loved the sun but you would hike for the shade when we were together you took me away. I didn’t think, I didn’t have nerves. We talked about the world We talked about life You had a life you thought you didn’t deserve. Whoever planted that seed had some **** nerve you wrote like me but I wrote for myself you wrote for us when there’d be nothing else. I knew when no one else could guess. you put it all on me, didn’t you. but I was not mad. Heartbroken, yes scared, yes alone, yes mad, no When you were gone I read and I read i wanted to know exactly when you felt what you felt. You called me your jav friend you called me your angel You are up there watching over me I yelled and screamed I couldn’t breathe. I shut them out, I cursed at you. I hated you I cried for you I only see you in my head Dreaming once and a while of your smile, of your eyes but they are never dark they are never sad they are never empty The vacant stare is not there. your hair is a giant mess and I freeze that moment right there. You said you were alone you said it was a secret you asked me about my darkest and you told me all your secrets I have never been in that much peace knowing I kept you there It felt like moments when it was hours and you were gone too **** soon. tomorrow came too fast and it was up to you. it was always up to you. Now I wear a band on my wrist and pray for your peace that is all I have left, but you mean so much to me. I hope you are happy, I hope your journey has ended and you found what you wanted My heart was once broken but soon if all this is true it will be mended.
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