#restriction
God sinned when he gave me nerve endings at 9 years old
I've got a mind full of mold and lips that
when kissed
turn into solid gold
Don't listen to a word I say:
I'm okay I am alright I'm fine
Instead act on my ever-extending un-exiting untold
Do not pretend to know me
Just know
You're mine
May 23, 2022
May 23, 2022 at 8:52 PM UTC
she is filled with fire,
yet she fails to glow
that darkness cries out for a guiding light,
and still the fire shows no mercy
in all it's stubbornness,
it permits the absence of a burning flame
and that roaring glow inside of her,
it dies
and so too does her soul.
Feb 9, 2021
Feb 9, 2021 at 1:07 PM UTC
They tell you to be open-minded yet they narrowed what it means to have an open mind.
“Think outside the box,” they say, yet the outside is guarded.
Everything is a big puppet show.
We live, then we die!
In between, we go through so much agony
only to attain this perfect life; a perfect life that yet to exist.
We all play pretend.
Some people find love, some find wealth, some suffer terribly.
I just want to break that chain of a perfect life
I didn’t ask to be a part of this but I was dragged into it.
They claim free will,
but it’s never free will, they hold you down.
We let them define your happiness
perfectly orchestrated by a wheel of illusion.
Nov 2, 2020
Nov 2, 2020 at 10:58 AM UTC
Translated by Przemyslaw Musialowski 10/7/2019
O scarecrow, dressed elegantly
- in worn-out shoes, ragged old hat,
on which black crow sits in dignity
and stares off into this distance where forest sad
- you certainly dream about traveling
into these wheat fields, grasses adorned with flowers
that you could lose your scarecrow's soul
running happily towards the horizon...
But you stand here, alas, forever lost in thoughts,
unable to understand where the restriction comes from,
with your straw heart always split
between both powerlessness and want.
Funny thing, my dear scarecrow - to have
so much on your own and not to.
Przemyslaw Musialowski 10/01/2008
Oct 10, 2019
Oct 10, 2019 at 7:39 PM UTC
One day, he found a rose,
Of deepest velvet red,
He brought it home and nurtured it,
He laid it on his bed,
And every day he'd stroke,
And rub those petals so,
He'd smell the sweetest scent from it,
And hoped that it would grow,
But too transfixed in love,
And admiration matter,
He failed to give it what it craved,
Some sunlight and some water,
So, wilted it became,
And started to decay,
It lost its rosy velvet reds,
The edges turning grey,
His eye was off the ball,
Distracted he became,
He killed the thing that he loved most,
Trying to make it tame.........
Mar 3, 2019
Mar 3, 2019 at 7:01 PM UTC
I am often in awe of your wild mind,
Despite your defences, I can see you are kind,
I know you believe me to be fickle and blind,
But I see you, and the reason for the wall you hide behind.
There is wonder and beauty that light up your eyes,
Yet everyone falls in love with your careful disguise,
Pain finds its way through your laughs and lies,
And there is sorrow within the man, that like a child, cries.
You can turn all the frowns that you see to a smile,
And upon seeing you, my clouds are cleared for a while,
But who mends the hurt that caused your soul's exile?
And when will you turn to face your denial?
Your cheer does not mask the tragedy inside,
Altruism will not change what you're trying to hide,
Unreachable, unfathomable- two ideas within you, allied,
To win the battle over self and thus deem you fortified.
But this barricade will not defend against flame,
Nature is power and emotion is the same,
We are already on fire, to deny it is insane,
So feel what you will, break the shackles of shame.
Feb 13, 2019
Feb 13, 2019 at 10:31 AM UTC
The time has come
The bird must jump from the nest
it's wings fully capable
yet it still hits the ground
May 4, 2018
May 4, 2018 at 1:22 PM UTC
We're so caught up in the world's rituals
its saddening
We wake up every morning and groan about our jobs and lives yet we don't do anything to change it
We follow the double consciousness of social norms and self thoughts
We keep our true selves hidden
We present what's "acceptable"
We live two faced
Anything that is not considered normal is unorthodox and therefore denied
Anything that is not considered beneficial to the society should not be brought up at all
Anything that is change and not following conventional practices is heretical and sinful
We're too focused on whats normal
good
acceptable
perfect
However, should an immoral desire stem from this freedom we're all doomed
We should all expand the normal ground for all people
If not we should create haven for those considered abnormal
All talk and no action
Unacceptable
No matter where you go
remember one thing
"It is not society that determines people’s future. It is people who determine society’s future"
Mar 1, 2018
Mar 1, 2018 at 10:24 PM UTC
like a seedling
shaded from the sun,
overfed with minerals,
stuck in the small *** -
the child couldn't grow out of their comfort,
as they were strictly cared for within the boundaries,
unable to reach out for their dreams.
the seedling couldn't grow beautiful like it was supposed to
despite longing to be like so,
thus they grew wither everyday
with every say of 'nay'.
how was it to grow their roots if its never allowed to move out of the small ***
let the seedling grow,
for you never know how beautiful of a flower,
how great of a tree it would become into.
-e.i.
Feb 9, 2018
Feb 9, 2018 at 11:04 AM UTC
Fresh baked bread
Layered in death and vegetation
My insides burn with withdrawal
It's been almost 24 hours now
How much longer will it take?
To either cave in unwillingly
Or to die painfully slow?
If I had not forgotten my cash
I'd have given in to my survival drives
I'm happy I forgot it
Because I can't stomach the idea of food
Let alone choke down something so revolting
Only because it pulls me further away from death
Instead I flood my veins with nicotine
Desperately trying to curb these cravings
My legs threaten to give out
With each step I take
Even now, scratching this among global fem notes
Dissociated entirely from class
My hands won't stop shaking
Is it nerves?
Or physical deterioration?
Or the panic lying under the surface?
Deafening screams ricochet through my mind
As I try to drown these feelings
But they won't disappear
I've dropped significant weight
And I don't want it back
I don't feel the need to lose more
But still it falls away
And eventually leaves nothing but skin and bones
Fueled by electrifying anxiety
Nov 17, 2017
Nov 17, 2017 at 3:14 AM UTC
Calibrating circles behind the eyes,
Making me twitch;
Startled. Surprised.
Like deer in the woods with antlers intertwined, your embrace consuming me.
Restriction.
Roots.
Vines.
Erroneous mutterings heard in the dark
The vibrations tingling the shallow hole in my heart.
Sep 11, 2017
Sep 11, 2017 at 4:37 PM UTC
They think I'm not eating
That must explain why
They keep trying to feed me.
I think they feel
My more pronounced hip bones
When leaning in to hug me.
Close up they may notice
How my clothes hang much looser now.
Do my arms look less filled in?
Have my cheeks began to cave?
Probably not.
Don't worry about me.
I'll be fine.
My stomach feels better now,
Although it's begun to burn more often,
But I don't care.
Because the closer I get to dying
The more I feel alive
Sep 5, 2017
Sep 5, 2017 at 2:53 AM UTC
"What do you fear?"
"The thought of never fearing"
"That doesn't make any sense though"
"Allow me to explain:"
Fear itself is an immense power
One that prevents us from rising, gives us bounds
Without it, Man would fall into chaos
And in the spree of delirious glee, he would get lost
If Man had no fear, he wouldn't care for rules
Only then would the smart ones be called fools
Be content with what you've got, don't try to take
What isn't yours, a potentially fatal mistake
Man is jealous of those who have
What he doesn't and this'll just make him mad
Without any fear, he'd challenge someone
And pretty soon the world would be bursting, full of guns
Rifles raised and triggers pulled
Blood spatters and bodies mauled
But without any restriction, Government or rules
Fear would disappear and guns would be our tools
So be thankful you have capacity to fear
Because without it you'd draw the world quite near
The end of its life, so forever and again
Be grateful the fear isn't in your hand but your brain
Sep 7, 2016
Sep 7, 2016 at 1:21 AM UTC
Longing to express it
Not to suffer and suppress it
But you tell me I can't
you tell me it's easier
You tell me it helps
I tell you it kills me.
Regreting my expectance
Receiving no acceptance
And you tell me I can't
you can't stand to hear it
I can't hold it in
I can't turn off my emotion
Decaying so painfully slow
Dead and so horribly alone
You tell me I can't
You say you need a break
That's it's better if you do
And I can't stay awake
Already lost in my asleep
Burried so far in the deep
And you tell me I can't
makes everything worse
Tearing me apart
How do u think this helps!
Maybe it will benefit you
You think it will benefit me too
You tell me I can't tho!
And I'm lost in this storm
Of endless torture
Forever so numb
In the end when you come back
I'll be the same and not on track
Because you tell me I cant..
I've held it in for so long
It's killed me so slowly
Nothing but dust
May 24, 2016
May 24, 2016 at 11:31 AM UTC
We can't let the flames spread
or else we'll burn this place.
Sep 18, 2015
Sep 18, 2015 at 9:47 AM UTC
To my darling angel, my heart goes to you,
I love being with you all the god **** time,
You have many nicknames but forever you're my boo,
Loving you my dear, should never be a crime.
Jun 12, 2015
Jun 12, 2015 at 7:41 PM UTC
I so badly want to say it back.
It's on the tip of my tongue but
Memories from before seal my mouth.
They press my lips together to prevent the words from escaping,
Forming a kiss.
Your eyes lock onto my mouth and I know
You won't give in until you taste
The sourness-
Though you mistake it for sweet.
Despite my silence I have said it.
I cannot seem to prevent myself.
I go in for another kiss.
This time I don't need the memories to move
My lips.
There. I said it.
Are you happy?
May 30, 2015
May 30, 2015 at 2:43 PM UTC
Say goodbye to freedom from restriction
Say hello to these walls, Cause we're boxed in
Hear the voices inside
As they're screamin'
Put your own needs aside
It's time we begin
You've been waiting for miracles
He's been wishing on stars
She's been dreaming of rainbows
I've been counting these scars
If everyone gave up
We would go just as far
Stopping now could be easy
Moving forward is hard
So stay in your corner
Locked inside you're own head
Keep on waiting,
Keep on wishing,
Keep on dreaming,
Until you're dead.
Feb 13, 2015
Feb 13, 2015 at 10:35 PM UTC
I don't like labels.
Labels mean restrictions.
*Oh, you want to do that?
No no, you can't!*
Labels mean expectations and
Expectations means disappointment.
Labels mean something has to be
Ought to be
Like this
& not like that.
We'd constantly be thinking if what we were doing
Was what we should be doing.
I like labels.
Labels mean structure,
And structure means order.
If everything was in its place-
Exactly as it ought to be-
We'd be okay.
We wouldn't have to worry about crossing over the lines
That the world has drawn up against us.
We'd know what to expect
And what to feel.
Jun 30, 2014
Jun 30, 2014 at 11:10 PM UTC