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#postpartumdepression
I find it hard to look upon the face of my sleeping child. All I see are all the ways I wasn’t what she needed today. Even now, with a sleeping face, I see peace, her innocence. As though not wandering in a world where not even I can protect her. What hell, for the Mother too afraid to look upon the face of her sleeping babe.
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Nov 24, 2018
Nov 24, 2018 at 10:42 PM UTC
Little Dreamer
Sweet soft powdery scent, Your warm tiny body held in my little hand, And our cord still pumping, I gaze at you and hear the name "Celine" whispered from the corners of my head. I can sometimes still feel you in my hand if I position just right. Your blanket no longer smells of that sweet powdery scent but I press it to my chest evermore. My tears burn of violet essence as they roll onto your blanket. The cry I wish I heard haunts me more than anything. The most delicate flower I have ever seen has been diminished into ash and put in this small heart shaped container. Although beautiful nothing compares to a flower still connected to mother earth basking in the sun and swaying in a light breeze. In a field of wild flowers you stand out and I can still smell your sweet soft powdery scent. Your skin as soft as flower petals, Your nose as small as a delicate leaf, And the cord no longer pumping similar to a flower being plucked from the ground. As I know too well a flower once picked will soon meet its demise. But you are the most beautiful flower, and I will never forget the scent of you, The feel of you, Nor can you ever be replaced. Finding the most perfect flower is impossible and I did.
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Mar 9
Mar 9, 2026 at 7:05 AM UTC
Violet