Everything is flat,
Yet my heart insists to beat.
I tried to speak again today,
So my mind stopped me.
I set out to be seen again,
and found no one looking.
I write words of no meaning,
to describe what’s in my head.
Broken mirrors all around me,
Reflecting all I feel.
I tried to find myself today,
To only find I’m dead.
Jan 8, 2019
Jan 8, 2019 at 10:01 PM UTC
Awoke to find I’m too much today.
My sides too soft
My steps too loud.
Less space around, too much within
Voices thought dead resurrected today,
Voices thought gone come back to speak
To remind me that I am too much again.
Jan 8, 2019
Jan 8, 2019 at 4:58 PM UTC
I could hear it tapping at my door.
I knew why it came here,
I knew who it was looking for.
Its presence was heavy,
My memories devoured me,
I saw the one who tapped at my door.
wanting what it took,
now looking for more,
I was the one it came here for.
Darkness returned me
It found what it came for
Then it left, shutting my door.
My head felt heavy
My darkness got loud.
I felt so alone.
I felt all I’m not right now.
I could leave through that door
To a world of no more
thoughts became darker
How long have I been staring at this door?
I feel it lurking at my door.
I hear it tapping.
Tap
Tap
Tapping on my ******* door.
Dec 22, 2018
Dec 22, 2018 at 11:18 AM UTC
Creeeeeaaaakk..
I always hated the sound that door made.
Whether you closed it fast or slow, the sound of the creak was always the same.
A signal, warning you not to proceed.
But you weren’t scared, you’ve done this many times before, to where you can’t remember,
and the hand holding yours, is a hand you’ve held before.
And the cement steps that led to the darkness,
felt warm and so welcoming.
It felt a little bit like coming home.
That’s all I remember.
It is here I woke up
The silence awoke me,
My feet were wet and cold,
my hand no longer recognized the hand that I hold.
As if it felt that moment I realized I’m in danger,
The hand would disappear, and I was left alone.
I was frozen.
I started to scream but nothing came out.
I shook from my fear and dashed towards the stairs, as if in danger.
I always expected something to pull me back.
The door felt so far.
Dec 11, 2018
Dec 11, 2018 at 11:43 PM UTC
The Witch of Estelle
Found her her vision.
for the Witch of Estelle found her His vision.
His vision of found
In this world for His sound.
For the Witch of Estelle, found her His Vision.
On 13th September
A fires quaint ember
Spoke what’s not spoken,
yet membered.
A mind for He sought,
with furnace for thought,
wisdom and secrets,
crafts and of demons.
All left unspoken,
yet remembered.
Nov 27, 2018
Nov 27, 2018 at 10:11 PM UTC
I find it hard to look upon the face of my sleeping child.
All I see are all the ways I wasn’t what she needed today.
Even now, with a sleeping face,
I see peace, her innocence.
As though not wandering in a world
where not even I can protect her.
What hell, for the Mother too afraid
to look upon the face of her sleeping babe.
Nov 24, 2018
Nov 24, 2018 at 10:42 PM UTC
They say it’s a curse, disguised as a gift.
An agreement She made with the Devil.
She danced with His darkness, and prayed for departure.
So feet, He had brought,
A treat, so She thought,
She was ready,
no surrender.
A gift’s what He gave Her,
A gift, not an offer.
For this gift bore
“conditions”.
She must suffer all thoughts,
His prisoner of dark,
Given words She must remember!
So He gave Her his pen.
Darkness, returned Her.
With a gift She could bleed,
no surrender.
Yet as He returned Her,
His ‘Secrets’, He gave Her.
The warmth of His breath
still lingers...
She summons His Darkness,
She plays with The Highest.
When Dark is too Dark
She surrenders.
For that’s how She became,
such beauty, yet ugly,
That’s how He bestowed Her-
“Royal Poetess”
Oct 29, 2018
Oct 29, 2018 at 12:49 AM UTC
What is it?
Comfort from stories you sought comfort before?
Eyes untouched by your demons?
Visions of becoming the best version of yourself?
Hungry ears devouring your stories?
Confusing calm for plain and boring.
Seeking dysfunction.
Problems created existing outside you,
hoping it gets loud enough.
Drowning out what’s within you.
Your soul doesn’t knock anymore?
This void that fed something
Replaced by hunger.
I’m homesick..
I miss you.
Willing misinterpretation of disappointment. Crafted intentions of abandonment.
Disguising what’s yours to retain integrity. You’ve always had your way out plotted. Hiding from the one you showed your duality,
I’ve always known you.
And this is just something you do repeatedly.
Aug 19, 2018
Aug 19, 2018 at 1:55 AM UTC
Give me your vision
I crafted within you.
I’ll pick up my pen
Your dreams I’ll pursue.
If bloods what you seek
I’ll open my arms.
Is flesh what you want?
**** it, do harm.
**** me Crowley.
Make me moan.
For you see, I worship thee.
Burn me Crowley.
Burn me.
Give me my vision,
You crafted within me.
Deliver me Crowley
I’ll make it my mission.
Aug 18, 2018
Aug 18, 2018 at 3:43 PM UTC
It sneaks up on you when you least expect it.
You start shivering from within.
You forget,
it’s too overwhelming.
You took a wrong turn,
now your lost.
Can’t say they didn’t warn you.
The fear is consuming,
as you become still.
For stillness is required to allow you to see.
To see the edge of eternity.
You creep to the edge,
each time a bit closer,
and you shake with that fear,
as you’re ravished with terror.
Stay calm and remember,
for the hole has no memories
of times you felt better.
The hole is a savior from painful nostalgia,
pulling you closer.
A reminder that your only getting further.
The hole contains silence,
that which can’t be broken.
The hole contains nothing,
nothing at all.
The hole does not hurt,
the hole does not care.
The hole grows wider every time you peek,
each time more seducing.
Because the day’s become harder,
and the nights just feel longer,
and the hole offers solace
for the tired and the weak.
The hole leaves impressions
It takes some of you.
For no one can peek into eternity,
for the hole takes your piece
and only grows larger
So here we are.
I’m almost gone.
The hole is now whispering
for me to come home
As it consumes
my body starts shaking.
And with my last breath
I whisper
“Nevermore, my sweet Lanore.
Nevermore.”
Aug 17, 2018
Aug 17, 2018 at 12:13 AM UTC