#onedayatatime
There are tough days
too much in the way days
heavy in the soul days
no feeling of control days
no clear thought days
no witty retort days
my body is a mess days
where do I confess days
******** in the mirror days
too much to consider days
what if I’d have done that days
where is all the fun at days
picking at the scab days
checking in to rehab days
the I’m no good to anyone days
someone should just shoot me days
there are
but they are days the same as all
and though they may come thick and fast
they fall
so stay x
Aug 12, 2021
Aug 12, 2021 at 8:57 AM UTC
I did it
I got in
And just like that
I can see my future again
May 6, 2020
May 6, 2020 at 1:26 PM UTC
"I'm too afraid to die but in too much pain to want to live.
So tell me, what do you do when you've given all you feel you have to give?
"Just live."
Feb 16, 2020
Feb 16, 2020 at 7:22 PM UTC
They're swinging left and swinging right.
They hide in the shadows just out of sight.
But how can I fight what I cannot see?
How can I stop them from breaking every piece of me?
If you're out there and feeling all alone,
you don't have to fight all on your own.
Because the more you ask for help, the more you take control.
And when you take control and feel it in your soul,
the doubts will start to disappear.
Doubts! The bullies of the mind.
Doubts! Leave no trace of them behind.
Now that you know how to fight back, it's time to put it to the test. Take it one step, one day at a time, and we'll figure out the rest.
Mar 23, 2019
Mar 23, 2019 at 6:55 PM UTC
I live every day in a self-inflicted wound
With self-destructive tendencies, my insides are festooned
I fill my lungs with nicotine to keep me calm
Adderal to keep me going as the day drags on
Alcohol to slow my breath and make me smile
Caffeinated beverages push me through each mile
Streaming television at all hours, night or day
To forcibly make vicious thoughts of self-loathing go away
Painkillers are administered every night for sleep
Behavioral modification so crazy thoughts won't make a peep
I drank, I smoked, consumed, and used
Altered, Changed, Rewired, Abused
Danced in the streets, a wistful fool
Clearly a vagabond, with pharmaceutical tools
Can't I stop?
Dance for us you idiot, give us delight
Why can't I stop?
Stand up like the stupid puppet you do each night
I'll stop!
Make merry like the fiend you are
...and it stopped
With the screeching brakes, horrible crash, and flipping of a car
Oh for a poor vagabond like me
My only drug now is the long road of recovery
Feb 19, 2020
Feb 19, 2020 at 8:05 AM UTC
Driving
Both of us said
nothing
We had to
leave the house
Stopping
I looked at him
and he at me
I smiled
he nodded
"She is not my Karen,"
he said,
"I lost her last May."
I pressed the gas
and the car moved
forward
So are we
Feb 3, 2020
Feb 3, 2020 at 2:44 AM UTC