#notagain
My heart beating frantically
As I lay down in my bed
Never thought that I would still feel this way again
And I wanted to feel those toxics
flowing freely and burning me insides
And to hamper the pain
I am feeling right now
Rather than to feel those growing gap
between us over and over again.
Dec 21, 2017
Dec 21, 2017 at 7:08 AM UTC
What are you doing here
Why are you in my head
You left long ago
Our connection should be dead
I was over it
All gone
I was better
Letter by letter
Recollecting my thoughts
Rebuilding my mind
What are you doing here
I eradicated your presence
Scrubbed my mind
Cleansed of you
A clearer view
Why are you back again
Why are you in my head
May 9, 2017
May 9, 2017 at 9:57 AM UTC
I rarely talk to you
I try not to think about you
But when we’re in the same room
My eyes unwillingly
Drift to you
Then my thoughts
And once again I mentally hit myself
Saying
That can not happen again
May 9, 2016
May 9, 2016 at 11:11 AM UTC
Excited like a kid at Xmas
Hands sweaty in anticipation
Then you appeared
From nervous reck to comfort
With only a lingering hug
We spoke like we speak everyday
Not like the 2 years it has actually been
I gather the courage and hold your hand
Then I kiss you like I used to
Suddenly it all ends abruptly, with me waking up
Jan 24, 2016
Jan 24, 2016 at 5:06 PM UTC
Purple thoughts of sprinting mind
Beautiful, loving, a shade of pink
Wandering, stressing out too much
The thoughts blotting my mind like a permanent ink
I want to say it to him
But I don't know how to think
Of something to spread smile across that face from grim
I don't know how to speak out my heart
I don't know if I do then would we be apart
Or closer than I never thought?
I want to burst out those words
In a simple manner
But simple seems more difficult
Difficult which makes me less saner.
So soon I would
Flush out those feelings
Into a void
A
N
D
I
WOULD
FEEL
LONELY
TO
BE
ALIVE,
Bury the thoughts and revive my sadness
Like I did it yesterday.
Apr 24, 2015
Apr 24, 2015 at 11:51 AM UTC
I may not post poetry all
The time, but when I do
it's from the heart and I stop my fall
I hope I make you feel the same too
I will not live forever
this fact I have accepted
but my words do not endever
my fears aren't of death but loss protected
My faith is not questioned
My trust is un-shooken
pain I have sustained is not treated
the wounds gape and are unforgiven
In pain I seek salvation
But I dare not ask for I fear
not of death but to find a solution
the solution to depression and Find
THE CURE
Dec 16, 2014
Dec 16, 2014 at 11:41 AM UTC
I feel like a *****
I say a lot of really unforgivably cruel things
To myself
All day
Everyday
It's been years since I have spent a day
Not muttering insults at myself
But they are all true.
I can't decide if truth or kindness should win when it comes to hurting myself emotionally.
Nov 23, 2014
Nov 23, 2014 at 2:37 PM UTC
1
Falling
2
Help me
3
I can't control this
4
No one can hear me
5
I should let go
6
Falling
7
Not worth it
8
Drowning
9
Breathing
10
Still Living
Aug 1, 2014
Aug 1, 2014 at 6:07 PM UTC