#neglected
I prayed to the god I don't believe in again
Please, I said
Just stop me from needing a friend
Help me believe or at least pretend
That being alone was the better end
That what I did, I did for them
But I had hoped they would see
and maybe not let me leave
tell me I was important to the family
but in the end they packed my bags for me
asked me for my key
got new locks and hid the door
so I couldn't come back anymore
Dec 29, 2025
Dec 29, 2025 at 1:24 PM UTC
I am the draft in the hallway,
the door that never shuts quite right.
You step inside,
but the warmth slips away—
I cannot hold it.
I paint the walls in vibrant hues,
yet when I turn,
the colors are already fading,
peeling into cracks
I can never seal.
I fill the rooms with furniture,
trying to make this place ours,
but I drape them in white sheets,
leaving them to gather dust.
You open the windows wide,
and I pull the curtains closed.
You knock at the door,
and I cannot always let you in.
And sometimes I fear
I’ve trapped us in this hollow place,
when you deserve a home
and not these half-lived walls
between here and nowhere.
I wonder if one day
you’ll walk these empty halls
and decide not to return
because I never learned
how to make a house a home.
Sep 20, 2025
Sep 20, 2025 at 7:53 PM UTC
The dormitory never sleeps.
Lights hum like insects,
shadows twitch across the floor,
and every night I remember,
this is not where I am visiting.
This is where I live.
This is where I am kept.
The other girls go home.
They vanish into weekends,
into kitchens filled with noises
and smell
and warmth.
They complain about parents,
about rules,
about being seen too much.
I would give anything
to be seen too much.
Instead, I return to my bed,
my small metal drawer of belongings,
my ceiling with its web of cracks.
It stares down at me every night,
silent,
unchanging,
a reminder that nothing waits
beyond these walls.
My parents are smoke now.
They pass through my thoughts like strangers.
Their voices are static,
distant,
sometimes I wonder
if they’ve already forgotten me.
Maybe I was too easy to let go.
Maybe I was never worth holding onto.
I don’t plan for the future.
The future is a locked door.
The future is another hallway
that leads back here.
I have stopped imagining anything else.
Sometimes, in the quietest hours,
a thought flickers,
a cruel kind of hope:
_one day I’ll grow wings._
But even as it comes,
I know it isn’t true.
Even birds fall.
Even birds are crushed beneath tires
on roads no one bothers to cross.
So I fold myself smaller each night,
make myself a shadow
so no one will notice how much I’m missing.
I practice the art of disappearing,
learning to dissolve into silence,
to be overlooked,
to vanish without the world
ever pausing to ask why.
And if I write it down,
it isn’t for saving.
It’s proof I was here,
that once there was a girl in this building
who waited,
and waited,
and was never collected.
Aug 24, 2025
Aug 24, 2025 at 7:41 AM UTC
I screamed in heavy rainfall,
hoped they would hear me.
Perhaps the thunder was too loud—
or maybe...
Their ears were filled with rainwater.
I wept in a silent room,
hoped they would wipe my tears.
Perhaps I didn’t weep loud enough—
or maybe...
They built walls where windows should have been.
Jul 31, 2025
Jul 31, 2025 at 8:05 AM UTC
They said, "Be mature, you're our only daughter,
We have expectations, don't drift any farther."
Not knowing how they crushed each hope she had,
And left her heart empty, forever sad.
They told her to act like a child, to play,
But when could she? She was forced to obey.
Left alone in a house that was dark and cold,
She grew strong, but her heart turned old.
They said, "You're tough, don't cry over pain,
These little scratches are nothing to explain."
Not seeing she'd grow, hurting deep inside,
Where pain was a secret, she could never hide.
She thought it was fine, that it was okay,
She still does it now, though it hurts every day.
Punished for things that she'd never done,
Now she repeats it when the day is done.
She was invincible, or so they believed,
But deep down, she was neglected, deceived.
Never loved, just a little girl.
Feb 24, 2025
Feb 24, 2025 at 9:42 AM UTC
"They said to be mature, you're the only daughter
we have expectations.
Not knowing how they killed every little expectations
from herself.
They said to act like a kid
but when?
when did she ever got a chance?
she was left alone, in a shady home
where she was grown as a backbone
of a family where she was never treated like a part of.
They said you're a tough kid
why cry? on these little scratches
Not knowing she would grow up hurting herself'
as it didn't matter, nor did it hurt.
She thought it was ok to do so
She still do.
She was punished for things she didn't even do
now she does the same in a quiet dark room.
She was invincible.
She was neglected.
She was never loved.
She was just a little girl.
Nov 26, 2024
Nov 26, 2024 at 1:19 PM UTC
When I speak
Nobody hears my voice
But when I scream
I am a monster
'cause I created a noise
Sep 14, 2022
Sep 14, 2022 at 12:52 AM UTC
These roaming thoughts
Keep crashing in my head
Forcing me to remember
How lonely it felt
To be with you
How you pushed me aside
To love on another.
I asked,
Wondered,
Begged
For a future with you.
But it seems that I’m not worthy
Of such hope.
My loneliness will consume
My fleeting happiness
I will always feel neglected
Sep 12, 2022
Sep 12, 2022 at 10:41 PM UTC
You hide the truth.
Everything you say to me
feels like glue.
I get stuck in it
and don't know what to do...
I always end up finding out the truth,
just not from you.
Jul 21, 2021
Jul 21, 2021 at 8:26 AM UTC
the forgotten child is nearing the end of their adolescence.
these thoughts have swam inside them for a decade
rumbling, roaring, ramming against their barricade
it was not me that was forgotten, but the naïve child inside me
i've spent a decade reserving my right to tell the awaited rescuer
that the child and i prefer to stay at our safe haven.
i am a body of 22, but a mind of 12
naïve 12 turned pitiful, pessimistic 14 turned people-pleaser 17
turned naive 18 turned pitiful, pessimistic 20 turned
please just come back, why did you never come back
i'll never stop wondering why i had to create my own safe haven
i've spent a decade reserving my right to turn away my wrongdoer
it's silly of me to think that you returning makes you a rescuer
nature versus nurture, a baby bird kicked from the comfy nest
a decade-long vacation from being a parent, abandoned until i grew
the forgotten child is nearing the end of their adolescence.
Jun 30, 2021
Jun 30, 2021 at 1:05 AM UTC
A cold abrasion
Numbing as quickly
As the words outpouring
Making raw a mind
Knowing no different
Than to accept
And try to live with
The disappointment
Of oneself.
Havoc raining as a wave
Twice as tall
Allowing no escape
But to watch
As the trauma unfolds
And the words
Spoken out of hate
Branded on my brain
As a reminder
Of being unworthy.
A blank canvas
Unknowing
To the wide staring eyes
Bruised beneath
The blank canvas veil
That is the shell
Of skin,
More alien on this body
The more photo albums
A mind fills with memories.
Could I really be
The monster
Of which
She speaks?
Deleting
Is the only option
To escape the toil
Of counting fingers
And reading
Truths and falsehoods
To conclude
Innocence or guilt
In my adolescence.
Silence is a grave
That one finds comfort in
When these walls
Are so used to ringing ears
From the storm
That only lasts seconds
But lingers
In the gilded silence
As the mind speaks
Above the bloodflow
When all one can do
Is plug ears
With fingertips
In order to live with oneself
Retaliation lies beneath
The bleeding
Now only visible
If friends are let close
To see
As the heart
Tears threads
That have been sewn
To restrict emotion
Loosening the seal
On the demon cradled within
A furnace
Are thrown the old photo albums
But in turn are the recents
As a block in the mind
Has been created
To forget
Because nothing is worth remembering
During a childhood
Of only knowing
The names
And the fear
Of what you are,
And after such a block has been made
Remembrance
Is no longer
A thread
Sewn in
To allow an escape.
Feb 26, 2021
Feb 26, 2021 at 9:44 PM UTC
I listen to the endless cries of cats at night
Lonely and helpless,
Abandoned and forgotten
Living in a narrow, deserted alleyway.
I’ve left cans of food for them,
But that’s not what they want
They want love
To feel protected and sheltered
By the sheer warmth of compassion
Some may want to be reunited with their mothers
Or from their owners’.
No matter how many times these poor animals were left out in the cold
Or met with the scorching rays of the sun
We’ve neglected them to the point where
Anything better than what they have right now will suffice.
The next time I hear their cries
I can’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of guilt
Part of me wants to take every one of them out of their miserable lives
But some of these cats had lives
Some of us overlooked that
Walked right pass a cat that belonged to someone who didn’t want them anymore
Threw them out like the piles of trash
In the alleyway.
Feb 4, 2021
Feb 4, 2021 at 7:47 PM UTC
All I ever get is your ashes:
The macaroni dinner you burned,
The last part of your jokes,
The short end of your smokes,
And the last ones will be in your urn.
Dec 7, 2020
Dec 7, 2020 at 9:18 PM UTC
ℜ𝔬𝔩𝔩𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔞𝔯𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔡 𝔦𝔫 𝔱𝔥𝔢
𝔖𝔱𝔦𝔠𝔨𝔦𝔫𝔢𝔰𝔰 𝔱𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔣𝔬𝔯𝔪𝔰
𝔄 𝔤𝔢𝔩𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔫𝔬𝔲𝔰 𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔟
𝔒𝔫 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔟𝔬𝔱𝔱𝔬𝔪 𝔰𝔥𝔢𝔩𝔣
𝔒𝔣 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔣𝔯𝔦𝔡𝔤𝔢
ℑ𝔰 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔴𝔦𝔫𝔢 𝔴𝔢 𝔰𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔢 𝔴𝔢'𝔡 𝔡𝔯𝔦𝔫𝔨
𝔈𝔳𝔢𝔯𝔶 𝔴𝔢𝔢𝔨𝔢𝔫𝔡 𝔰𝔦𝔫𝔠𝔢 𝔉𝔢𝔟𝔯𝔲𝔞𝔯𝔶
ℭ𝔶𝔫𝔦𝔠𝔞𝔩𝔩𝔶 𝔞𝔴𝔞𝔦𝔱𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔠𝔬𝔫𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔭𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫
May 8, 2017
May 8, 2017 at 12:30 AM UTC
To sing to a void of silence, eating away at the sound I make,
Hoping something reacts and makes a sound.
I realized the pattern before me.
A sea of silence
A space of eyes
Alone, in this place
Singing my heart aloud...
But then i begin to wonder;
why?
When it's only me in the end.
Am I crazy to continue to share my emotions with the eyes
Although they don't provide me the company I desire
Am I singing to feel sane
Or is it because I'm starting to feel tired
Cold, descending into the abyss of depravity
I'm not really okay
I just want to be held
But once again
It's only me...singing alone
In a deep silence of eyes
Forever trapped in a pattern that won't decay
Sep 18, 2020
Sep 18, 2020 at 8:43 AM UTC
Alone on a chilly night in September
Lost emotions still vividly remember
Sands of time erase happier days
Wondering why so little good stays
When I don't hear from you I stress
Inner storm only tamed by your caress
The weather lately has taken a turn
For the cold my heart holds will always return
Where my footprints fade and yours begin
Moments eternity seems suspended in
With another call straight to voicemail goes
Saltwater teardrops I fight like foes
At war with my own weakness and doubt
Puzzles and riddles I can't figure out
Shadows overtake our souls with shame
Empty and vacant
Demons steal our names
When you disappear I am left neglected
To forgive you comes easier than expected
The tide pulls you out and washes back ashore
Each time I wonder what you even leave me for?
Sep 15, 2020
Sep 15, 2020 at 9:13 PM UTC
fireflies
wild flowers
growing in the rough
let them grow
where they go
thriving sure enough
Jun 1, 2020
Jun 1, 2020 at 2:41 PM UTC
You wonder
Where you stand in his life
You wonder what he wants
Baby girl
You think he wants to love you
But don't be foolish
For all he want
Is to **** you
Look at you
You're irresistible
You think he wants you for you
But he clearly just wants to use you
It's quarantine
Everyone is insane from the lack of ***
You were naive to think he wanted you
He doesn't even care about you
He pretend to
Just so he could get in your pants
Just remember
No guy in this world will want you
All of them just wants to **** you
May 23, 2020
May 23, 2020 at 12:53 PM UTC
You want to survive, you want to fight
you need to prove that you can get through the night
but after so many years of being a scapegoat
you realize that no matter what,
you're still stuck on the same boat
All you wanna do is tell them what they did wrong
yet they just keep singing their ignorance song
you don't even care if you become successful and rich
as long as you find a wonderful wife, and have beautiful kids
Yet after all this time you realize you're on your own
left behind, heartbroken, with an enormous l̶o̶a̶n̶ debt..
you can keep on moving, keep on running
but even so the problems will always be coming
Still you gotta keep on fighting, even after so long
because the good things comes only to those who stay strong
for after all this time, after all this pain
you gotta prove that you can do it, and that it wasn't all in vain
Apr 28, 2020
Apr 28, 2020 at 9:50 AM UTC
I wish I were to be a book,
Left to be unopened.
Nobody reads books anymore.
May the dust blanket me
I'll try to not let it hinder me.
For I know what wonderful words lie underneath.
Because nobody reads books anymore,
It's just me.
Apr 7, 2020
Apr 7, 2020 at 1:38 PM UTC
If feeling lonely
Lost, neglected, hurt, or sad
Things will get better
Feb 19, 2020
Feb 19, 2020 at 6:53 AM UTC