i'm sitting across from you
black coffee in your hands (as usual)
sugared syrup (your words) in mine
a little small talk and catching up
we smile the same dogtoothed smile
it's like no time has passed
i've missed you
(we are avoiding the reason)
(we'll never see eye to eye on it anyway)
i've missed you too
we both feel the time that's passed
we finish our coffee (not too quickly)
you hug me and i hug you back
(i haven't hugged back in so long)
salt-sprinkled beard scrapes my head
i think too much time has passed
w.e.
Sep 19, 2023
Sep 19, 2023 at 7:02 PM UTC
the forgotten child is nearing the end of their adolescence.
these thoughts have swam inside them for a decade
rumbling, roaring, ramming against their barricade
it was not me that was forgotten, but the naïve child inside me
i've spent a decade reserving my right to tell the awaited rescuer
that the child and i prefer to stay at our safe haven.
i am a body of 22, but a mind of 12
naïve 12 turned pitiful, pessimistic 14 turned people-pleaser 17
turned naive 18 turned pitiful, pessimistic 20 turned
please just come back, why did you never come back
i'll never stop wondering why i had to create my own safe haven
i've spent a decade reserving my right to turn away my wrongdoer
it's silly of me to think that you returning makes you a rescuer
nature versus nurture, a baby bird kicked from the comfy nest
a decade-long vacation from being a parent, abandoned until i grew
the forgotten child is nearing the end of their adolescence.
Jun 30, 2021
Jun 30, 2021 at 1:05 AM UTC
She doesn't know
But I think I love her
And I think that I want her
To be mine
She doesn't know
But talking to her
Makes me smile like
I've just won the lottery
She doesn't know
But even writing this
I get a pang in my stomach
From a storm of butterflies
She doesn't know
But no one compares to her
She doesn't know
But everyone else does
May 31, 2015
May 31, 2015 at 7:14 PM UTC
Your words melted from the heat of your mouth
and dripped from your tongue.
The syllables sounded like gunshots firing from your lips
dropping against the ground with a metallic thud.
How many times have you performed this execution?
Deep down I knew you were a fox and I was a rabbit
but I never thought you would stop my heart in such a way.
My heart stuttered when you said my name
but now the mention of yours freezes me
like the cold that creeps into a lifeless body.
You always said you had no soul
but with every death you leave in your wake,
you collect yet another.
I remember begging you to stop speaking
to stop reloading your bullets.
But what's the point when you already planned
to leave me behind, struggling to breathe?
Nov 8, 2014
Nov 8, 2014 at 1:15 AM UTC
It's been really chilly lately,
as if the sun has ceased to give off heat.
If I were yours, it would be easy
to talk about holding you to share warmth.
And maybe it's worth noting that
my heart beats faster as I write this.
But as the leaves fall and flowers
begin to die off, I begin to
think I've been beat.
Because God knows she's
better than this bitter
autumn and girl.
So maybe it isn't worth mentioning
at all that your voice was the
highlight of my day.
In conclusion, all I've learned
in this frigid season is that my heart
warms too quickly to strangers.
Nov 8, 2014
Nov 8, 2014 at 1:10 AM UTC
7:14 PM //
Will you marry me?
7:38 PM //
Yes. Not today though, it would be dark by the time we got home.
2:30 PM //
Marry me
2:35 PM //
One day
6:50 PM //
Marry me
6:50 PM //
I can't today, but I will
2:14 PM //
Will you marry me
2:16 PM //
Yes. It's too hot today though
2:17 PM //
I got a bag of cheetos I've been trying to finish for like 3 days can we get married when I'm done with the bag
2:20 PM //
I guess we'll see
6:27 PM //
Will you marry me
6:28 PM //
I'm not dressed well enough but yes, eventually
6:29 PM //
I'd marry you in pajamas and you'd still be absolutely stunning
6:30 PM //
You're lovely
11:42 PM //
Lets get married
11:43 PM //
If you insist. It's kind of late though
11:43 PM //
It's daytime somewhere
tn
Aug 20, 2014
Aug 20, 2014 at 12:08 AM UTC
2:00 A.M //
I do this some nights
Wish for you to come back
When I feel lonely.
But I'm different now.
2:15 A.M. //
Why am I writing this
I just feel numb.
This is begging for you
To hurt me again.
2:38 A.M. //
**** you.
Jesus ******* Christ.
I hate you.
I'm glad you're gone.
3:00 A.M. //
Why did you leave?
Why did you say you'd stay?
You always leave.
This was the last time.
3:23 A.M. //
I don't remember your number.
I need someone right now.
But it feels like you died.
Are you okay?
3:24 A.M. //
It feels like you died.
But you're still here.
You still live in my head.
You're still ******* me up.
t.n.
Aug 6, 2014
Aug 6, 2014 at 3:27 AM UTC
"You shouldn't see me like this."
I frowned, wondering why.
Are you afraid I'll leave you?
If you are, you should know
That I love you.
When I think of you being happy,
I think of freckles
and butterflies.
And the way you smiled.
The way you made me feel.
Like a thunderstorm was inside me.
The warmth covering my skin,
and the air was a little heavier.
And I love you.
When I think of you being sad,
I think of the times I've ran to you
When I was hurt and crying.
And how you patiently help me
Until my tears are gone.
And I love you.
When I think of you being angry,
I think of you listening when I'm angry.
How you wait for me to calm down
And then we joke about my temper.
And I love you.
I love you.
I love every part of you.
Love doesn't stop.
Not in anger or sadness.
I love every single part of you.
And I'd love to see your every emotion.
t.n.
Aug 4, 2014
Aug 4, 2014 at 3:30 AM UTC
Now at 3:25 a.m.
All that matters to me
Is how your lips would feel
If they were slowly dancing with mine
How your skin would feel
If it were underneath my fingertips
And imagining the way your hands
Would curl around mine in the dark.
At 3:25 a.m. my mornings
Used to be dark and lonely
Cold and empty.
But this is what happens
When you fall in love
You trade in that loneliness
For a garden of daisies
Because if they like daisies, you like daisies.
And suddenly all that matters
Is watering that garden
And watching it grow
And praying a drought won't appear
Because at 3:25 a.m.
You're the entire world to me
And I don't want it any other way
t.n.
Jul 24, 2014
Jul 24, 2014 at 3:37 AM UTC
I never felt more alive than I did
That moment that you said
"I love you. I'm in love with you."
It was like electric currents
Shot clear through my vertebrae.
And I forgot to breathe for a moment.
And every day since then
At one
and two
and three
in the morning
I crave to hear it once more.
Because you've marked me.
You've etched yourself into my mind.
I told you, I made you promise
That you would stay
So you couldn't break my heart.
And you replied that
Breaking my heart would be
To throw your reason to wake up
Away.
And for that
I love you
Ever so much
More.
t.n.
Jul 19, 2014
Jul 19, 2014 at 7:24 AM UTC