#mythoughts
I always took love as a prison.
Bars you don’t see,
rules you don’t question,
time you serve
without knowing the sentence.
I just didn’t think
I’d be in it alone.
Door’s open.
That’s the mad part.
No guard.
No lock.
No one stopping me leaving.
Still here.
Same spot.
Same thoughts pacing back and forth
like they’ve got nowhere else to go.
That’s how it works, ain't it?
Not chains,
just habits.
You get used to it.
Get used to the echo of your own voice
being the only thing answering back.
Get used to filling in silence
like it’s your job.
Get used to thinking
if something’s missing,
it must be you.
I’ve sat with that long enough
for it to sound normal.
Like...
Maybe I’m just… extra weight.
Not in a loud way.
Not something anyone says outright.
Just that feeling
you read between everything.
Late replies.
Short answers.
Energy that don’t quite match yours.
You clock it.
Start adjusting.
Say less.
Expect less.
Take up less space.
Like you’re trying to fit into something
that was never built with you in mind.
And when it still don’t sit right,
you blame yourself.
Of course you do.
Easier than admitting
some things just don’t line up.
But the thought creeps in anyway.
Quiet.
Maybe it’d be easier
if you weren’t here like this.
Not gone,
just… removed from the equation.
Like taking your name out of a group chat
that don’t really include you.
Everything carries on.
Cleaner.
Simpler.
That’s how it tries to sell it.
Not dramatic.
Just practical.
And I’ve sat with that too,
long enough to feel it settle,
long enough to almost agree.
That’s the dangerous bit.
How reasonable it can sound
when you’re tired.
But then I look around,
same room,
same air,
same version of me
that’s still here despite it.
And I realise,
this “prison” ain’t love.
It’s what I built around it.
All the overthinking,
the second-guessing,
the way I turn silence
into something personal.
Walls I kept reinforcing
thinking they were protecting me.
They weren’t.
Just kept me in.
And yeah,
it still feels like I’m doing time some days.
Still catch myself pacing.
Still hear those thoughts
trying to sound like facts.
But the door’s open.
Has been.
I just never trusted
that I was allowed to walk out.
Thought I had to earn it.
Thought I had to be lighter,
easier,
less of whatever I think I am.
But maybe,
maybe it was never about that.
Maybe I’m not a burden.
Maybe I just stayed too long
in places that made me feel like one.
That’s harder to admit.
But it’s closer to truth.
So I’m still here.
Not fixed.
Not free like that.
Just… aware now.
And that’s enough
to take one step closer
to the door.
May 2
May 2, 2026 at 6:27 AM UTC
It wasn't a bad day.
That’s the problem.
Nothing went wrong,
nothing went right either.
Just… one of those days
that stack on top of each other
until you stop telling them apart.
I got home,
same routine,
same silence waiting for me
like it always does.
Keys down.
Shoes off.
No one asking how it went.
No one to answer anyway.
I sit there for a bit
not doing anything,
just letting the room exist around me.
And it hits again.
Not loud.
Not dramatic.
Just that same thought
slipping in like it belongs,
what difference does it make if I’m here?
No reaction at first.
Just let it sit.
Because I’ve heard it before.
Different days.
Same voice.
And I start looking around,
nothing’s changed.
Same walls.
Same air.
Same version of me
that don’t quite land anywhere properly.
Like I exist…
but not in a way that shifts anything.
People say they care.
I hear it.
I do.
But it don’t always feel like it reaches me.
Like it stops just short
and I’m left filling in the rest myself.
And I try,
I try to make sense of it,
to not take things personally,
to not turn every silence
into something it might not be,
but I still do.
And that’s tiring.
The kind of tired
that don’t show on your face,
just sits behind everything.
Makes simple things feel heavy.
Makes you question
if you’re the common problem
in situations that keep repeating.
I’ve sat with that thought long enough
for it to feel familiar.
Like maybe I am just… difficult to hold onto.
Maybe I don’t land right with people.
Maybe there’s something about me
that makes things fade.
And once that starts
your head don’t help.
It builds on it.
Stacks it up.
Turns a feeling
into something that sounds like fact.
And I sit there
with all of it in my head
and nowhere for it to go.
No distraction.
No noise.
Just me
and everything
I haven’t
worked out yet.
And for a second,
I don’t know what else to do with it.
Not fix it.
Not understand it.
Just… carry it.
And I realise,
I’ve been carrying it on my own
for longer than I admit.
That’s what gets to me.
Not even the sadness
just how quiet it all is.
How normal it feels
to sit in it
and not say anything.
And I don’t have some big answer.
No clean way to wrap it up.
Just this moment
where I’m sat here
with everything feeling heavier than it should,
and the only thing I can think to do is…
say something
I haven’t said properly in a while -
Saint Jude.
Patron of difficult cases,
of things almost despaired of, pray for me.
I am so hopeless and alone.
Please pray for me that God come to me in my hour of need,
and I receive consolation in all my tribulations and sufferings.
And that, I may bless God with
the elect for all eternity.
Amen.
May 2
May 2, 2026 at 4:13 PM UTC
Thoughts fumble for hours ,
the void slowly eating me whole.
It breaks down the courage to act,
then makes the unbearable stay longer.
A mind that talks to itself
about situations that never even happened ,
wounds that exist only in rehearsal.
The fear that haunts every late night,
a silent monster
that makes the impossible
feel terrifyingly real.
© Mission Gaire, 2026. All rights reserved.
Apr 4
Apr 4, 2026 at 12:36 PM UTC
My word doesn’t matter.
The problem is, I’m nobody.
I just watch this **** from the sidelines.
I don’t matter so neither do my words.
I sit back on a beach chair with my feet in the sand.
A lit cigarette,
and jerrycan full of gas.
Sunglasses on, watching it all go down.
Aug 3, 2025
Aug 3, 2025 at 8:12 PM UTC
If a pen could relay all my thoughts
All those tiny speckles and threads that get often lost
My eye would like to describe the tinest details
And my hand would want to draw all its artistic tales
If my heart could realy what it thinks
All those flutters, its strongest strings
My beats would tell those feelings,to share
And my touch would make the world watch and stare.
Apr 27, 2022
Apr 27, 2022 at 2:45 PM UTC
I have grown to be unknown
invisible like the dew
hiding behind buildings
and gliding through passages.
My charm is as un-noticed
as the workshop apprentice,
my words unheard, voice absurd
to the premeditated busy man
briskly moving through the crowd.
I myself collate my actions,
but for anyone to give a deeper glance
well I just leave that upto chance.
Dec 13, 2020
Dec 13, 2020 at 8:45 AM UTC
do the words I write effect anyone?
is my staring at my screen worth it?
would it matter if I was gone?
would I be intellectually unfit?
do you feel my words are relatable?
is my effort nothing?
is my content debatable?
do you think I'm fussing?
am I annoying?
or am I wrong?
am I writing poems enjoying?
is my complaint tedious and long?
do my words ever become your song?
was I wrong all along?
is this where I belong?
because the people here make me strong.
Dec 30, 2019
Dec 30, 2019 at 5:33 PM UTC
Moments of life,
Moments to explore,
Moments when I go crazy,
Moments when I need more.
Moments that are mine,
Moments that I do not own,
Moments that are heightened,
Through thoughts and no thoughts alone.
Moments penning poetry,
Moments by the sea,
Moments smelling flowers,
And the thorns pricking me.
Exquisite Joy
and Exquisite pain,
Moments with another,
feeling his grasp on my mane.
Moments where my thoughts are in knots,
Moments of release where I see just stars and dots.
And then sweet oblivion,
And floating gently above the tree,
Moments where I open my body and soul,
And am bound and totally free!
Jul 23, 2019
Jul 23, 2019 at 11:35 PM UTC
Right now I am happy...
I feel comfortable and I feel safe.
I feel grateful for my existence and I'm enjoying my life.
I feel a warmth envelop me a hundred times a day.
Reminding me I am alive and content and free.
Right now I am happy...
I am happy to be me.
I know I'm going the right way even though I'm not certain which way that may be.
I know this from my feelings deep down inside.
I've learned to understand me, for so long I have tried.
Right now I am happy...
It's been a journey and I've survived.
I learned the hard way, to be calm and still my pride.
I want others to learn sooner, that way they can enjoy life.
Because right now I'm happy, happy to be alive.
Feb 24, 2019
Feb 24, 2019 at 12:36 PM UTC
If you are a tree
I would love to be your Parchayi.
If you are a rock
I would love to be your standby.
If you are a rocket
I would love to be the satellite.
If you are a sea
I would love to be the saltiness.
If you are you
I would love to be your Beloved Wife.
May 12, 2018
May 12, 2018 at 6:06 AM UTC
Poetry for me, is a way to express my emotions, even without using big words like melancholy, or ecstatic. I prefer a simple, laid back approach to my situations, making it a more mindful, and understanding experience. I do use imagery, and symbols, but in a way a reader can understand, such as my current poems “Help me” and “Grey”. Help me is about my struggles with gender identity and sexuality, using the prison walls as a box i had put myself in, not letting myself express who I really am. In Grey, the eyes, the tears, and the clouds dancing is me letting go of my past mistakes, and indulging into unhealthy coping mechanisms. “The clouds swirling into some kind of scary dance” Is when I decided to try my first cigarette, the smoke swirling into the air like it’s dancing. The eyes are grey, mimicking a rain cloud, my eyes going from dark brown to dark grey. The tears are self explanatory, because in the poem I state “Mimicking rain”. I had written stories, and attempted poetry all my life, and writing is a simple way I express myself. Even if it’s a suicide note, to a story, It helps me feel better in the end. Just because I don’t wish to use fancy words in my poems does not mean I don’t know how to fit them in. I’ve studied and loved poetry all my life, and listened to songs that were originally poems. My poems have parts in which they rhyme, and don’t rhyme. It’s a way I help show my emotion, the non rhyming parts showing my aggression towards something. Poetry can have two different types of writing styles in it, and doesn’t just have to be rhyming, or non rhyming. As long as it has a rhythm, and conveys the ideas of what you’re trying to say, It’s fine. -Ashton
Mar 1, 2018
Mar 1, 2018 at 9:55 AM UTC
“And to his surprise, there were butterflies coming out of his mouth.”
--- --- --- ---
Quite literally, nothing is literal. Everything is a grain of salt in itself, and therefore no matter what we do or say or read or hear or exist, we all die of sodium poisoning. Is that a possible thing to do? Can we live, breathe, exist even if we ourselves are but a single grain of salt to be taken with other infinite grains of salt? Can a grain of salt itself die in general, let alone die of sodium poisoning?
Ah, sand, then? No, that can’t be any better. What about sugar? Absolutely not. What is everything, then, if not a grain of salt to be taken with another grain of salt, and another, and another?
An extended metaphor, maybe. How many grains of salt does it even take to create an extended metaphor, though? How does one measure such a strange volume? Would the measurements even be cubic? Volume? Area? What does an extended metaphor look like? A paragraph, I suppose, so that would be area. But how big would this paragraph be? Average? How big is the average paragraph, and how would anyone ever count the endless amount of paragraphs being written everywhere and everywhen? Further research is required.
I find myself wishing much more than I ever have, or ever should, that there existed any kind of salt-to-paragraphs conversion chart.
Aug 25, 2017
Aug 25, 2017 at 3:56 PM UTC
Knock knock
Who's there
Anxiety
Anxiety who
Anxiety that never left because it's always there no matter what
When you hear the word anxiety you think one of three things
1. Panic attacks
2. Nervous ticks, for example: nail biting, chewing on your shirt, st-st-stuttering, stumbling over, I mean, over words that are yours, I mean stumbling over your words, blushing, etc. etc. etc.
Or 3. Being nervous
For those who think about the first option:
Panic attacks are included. So are mental breakdowns, hour long crying sessions, difficulty to breathe, and hearing your heartbeat every day and night 24/7.
For those who think about the second option:
Nervous ticks are always a part of it, no matter how small they are or how noticeable it is. And yes, we are trying to stop. But saying we need to stop won't help anything because we already know. Stop wasting your breath on facts we already know.
For people who think about the third option:
Yes and no. It is being nervous and yet, it's so much more.
It's saying I'm sorry when you don't need to but you feel like you should because you think you did something wrong.
It's scratching at spots that aren't itchy but you feel your insecurities crawling over your body like fire ants and it hurts so you scratch.
It's making problems out of thin air like a magician pulls a rabbit out of an empty hat. Except there's nothing magical about it. It's terrifying and it shapes the way you think and act and feel and walk and talk and breathe and are.
It's feeling like your friends aren't your friends because you think they talk bad about you behind your back like spies among a common enemy and the common enemy is you.
You don't like being the common enemy so you ask them if you're annoying and you ask them if you're a bad person and you ask them if you did something wrong and you say you're sorry in a blizzard of words and scrambled up sentences.
For example,
When I was in 5th grade I felt my best friends drifting away and I didn't know what to do because I'm scared of being alone. As the year went on, I had this nagging feeling at the back of my mind that they were talking about me behind my back and didn't like me at all. At the end of the year, I finally gathered enough courage to ask if they were. My friend was offended and said no. All summer it bugged me. It was like another stone added to my wall of insecurities built around me in the shape of the person I wanted to be. After summer, I frantically apologized and they looked at me like I was crazy. I still feel like a monster.
Anxiety is also feeling like a monster is under your bed. But when you check it's in your closet. Then, it's behind you. Then, it's beside you. And finally you realize, it's inside you. And in a horrifying second you realize that you can't run from it because how do you run away from your mind?
I am afraid of my mom, my dad, my siblings, my friends, my teachers, my girlfriend, my principal, my vice-principle, and everyone else in my life. That includes the stranger I walk by on the sidewalk on my way to my house.
I am afraid of letting them down. I am afraid of them hating me. I am afraid of losing them. I am afraid of them pitying me. I am afraid of needing their help. I am afraid of asking for help. I am afraid of them seeing me as weak. I am afraid of them sending me to get get help. I am afraid of them realizing that I am a monster.
I am a monster.
I feel like a monster.
That's anxiety.
Anxiety is feeling like a monster in human skin, trying to play out the part of a normal human being and failing miserably and awkwardly.
That's anxiety.
At least it is for me.
Mar 18, 2017
Mar 18, 2017 at 5:07 AM UTC
The way I oppose
What everyone say,
The day I realised
That everyone pray,
Not to the god
But with a heart fraud
To someone superior
At first prior,
Like everyone wanna gain
Without any drain
This is what a human is
Catch a fish
And win a wish,
You Might have seen any falling star
Not so far
And did a wish,
Can you say what it is?
You will say no
Thats what I know
This is an example
Of human mind sample,
People define predefined myths
But never try to catch undefined facts,
The reason I fear
Is that they will change never ever,
Sorry if I went offtractk or off your mind
Ignore those lines like a blind
That will be so kind.
Nov 19, 2016
Nov 19, 2016 at 8:01 AM UTC
A collection of my thoughts in 140 characters and less.
Will be updating more.
--
Play the piano
As you let those hands
slide from one key to another
Let the raging emotions
Echo in the room
Until that final note subsides
--
Smile
Even though you're drowning
I'll save you
Reach out your hand
I'll be your lifeline
I'll be there
Dont worry
I wont let you go
Promise
---
Maybe if you tried
To love him
The way she did
Maybe he wouldn't
Be looking for someone
Better than you
---
Look into his eyes
You can see the beauty
Of the unknown
The longing he has
For something
He can never have
You will see--
Yourself
---
It's 1am
I'm still thinking about
What could have been
What I could have held
and What i could have done
For you to stay
Forever
---
Do not give me
flowers and chocolates
They cant suppress my desire
to hold you tight
and tell you
"you're mine"
while we lay under the stars
---
It's a special day
For you and I
As you get ready
For the ringing bells
Of the church
And I,
Get ready for my
First day at work
---
When I saw your name
I no longer felt the pain
I couldn't remember the happiness
I won't go back to the past
And I was sure
I was over you
---
People are like puppets
We can constantly deny it
But there are strings
Attached to our souls
Manipulating us to do what must be done
---
If I were given a chance
To turn back time
I won't change my past
Instead, I'll visit myself
Drop a note with the lottery's
Winning numbers
---
We're not friends
We're more than that
You're just too arrogant
To acknowledge that fact
Because of that,
You lost me in the sea
Of sorrow
---
My vision started to blur
When you told me
You wanted to leave
I never really enjoyed
Smoking and drinking
But it's all I could
Think about
---
Maybe you're right
We've grown too different
To understand each other
We've drifted apart
From the neutral ground
We used to call home
---
If you saw me in a different light
Would you take the risk
Of falling in love with me
Even though it probably
won't end right
Would you?
---
You're going to slip
Through my fingers
Like you always do
But today's different
I'm going to let you go
Without hesitation or regret
---
Aug 22, 2016
Aug 22, 2016 at 11:16 AM UTC
Sep 7, 2015
Sep 7, 2015 at 8:32 AM UTC
I drove down the 605 and lost track of time.
"I'm just one drug run away from death", I thought to myself
as I listened to country blues and wondered how I'll feel
when I'm ten years older.
I thought I wanted kids but maybe I was wrong
I'm not sure if I'm tired of being tired
or bored of being bored
or which would be worse.
The heater blasts hot air against my face
It's too hot so I turn it on cold
It's too cold.
It never feels right.
Sep 3, 2015
Sep 3, 2015 at 2:06 PM UTC
Many need to realize
that depression?
Isn't just sadness.
It isn't just feeling down.
I write this with some,
irritation.
There are people who throw
the word depression around
when they mean sadness
or having an off day.
I don't mean to sound so much
like a pompous ***
But depression is having off days
one right after the other
after the other
after the other.
It feels so painful
and empty
and hollow
and aching.
Aching not even for
a glimmer of happiness.
More aching to not feel
such emptiness.
If I exaggerate it's only
to further prove how far removed
depression is from
run of the mill sadness.
I'm not an authority
on what depression is
or how it affects everyone
or how it doesn't affect everyone.
I just know how mine feels.
I don't speak for all those
fighting the good fight
against depression.
I'm just speaking my mind
pointing out how so many
misunderstand, what I feel
is a simple concept to grasp.
Jul 20, 2015
Jul 20, 2015 at 2:33 AM UTC
This isn’t my life.
I’m just going through the motions until they get back.
Holding their place until they are done playing in mine.
One day we will trade back.
But for the time being, I’m stuck.
Being them.
May 27, 2015
May 27, 2015 at 1:42 PM UTC
If you ask me what it is love
What do you want me to tell you?
Do you want to know the way it feels or what it does to you?
For the way it feels, people can tell you things or you can read stories but
You can’t feel love till you feel it.
As for what it does to you,
This is no easy task.
It can envelope you and consume you,
It can elevate you or keep you on your knees,
It can empower you or destroy you,
It does many things to you,
I can’t even begin to explain what it has done to me.
But I’ll tell you what,
It’s worth it,
Whatever love I had or have,
I always have someone that loves me,
And when I’m in love, I fall in love.
Deep under into its sweet abyss,
Energy that just runs through your body and shakes your soul,
Something that makes you forget small things,
Such as the hate, sadness, pain and anger.
You grow into something that comes from nothing and is filled with this thing called love.
You look past imperfections and materialistic objects,
Into what’s actually real and pure,
The core of your being,
That which makes you shine and bright,
Once you’ve loved,
You learn that there’s a choice of how to live and react to situations,
Making mistakes is what will get you to love,
For that which is not normal,
Puts you in a space of multiple possibilities,
And opening your mind to the unknown,
You’ll learn love in ways you can’t imagine.
And in that you are different,
Not a different person, but in fact your true self.
When you are the person you are inside but able to live it outside,
Not that you don’t normally,
But you are your most complete self, when you’re comfortable in your own skin.
Doing the things that matter,
Rather than worrying about all the little things that prevent you from true potential.
Love pushes you forward from what you wanted into something unexpected.
And isn’t that beautiful.
I want to continue,
I know what I feel and can express my true self to you,
But you’ll have your own experience at it.
This is one piece of script in a book that has no ending till you die and not even then.
Find yourself in love,
And let it take over you,
Give in order to receive,
And don’t expect it back
So you lose no love,
And have no motive to love,
Instead love just to love,
Whole-heartedly.
Mar 10, 2015
Mar 10, 2015 at 3:07 AM UTC
Dear The Boy Who Is Wasting My Time and Emotion,
I can do so much better than you.
no you can't
You are hurting me, every time you speak to me, you break me a little more.
Get over it Princess. You deserve it. God, you're pathetic.
Stop texting me when you have a girlfriend
but you want him to, secretly
I am going to find someone someday who is so much better than you.
Someone who will treat me right instead of treating me like I'm his
Plan B. I'm going to find someone who doesn't drink and get high to
work out his problems when he can't even legally drive yet. That's not
called "being complicated and deep" as you seem to think, it's
called "being an alcoholic and a druggie". I'm going to find someone
who reads, who likes the same books I do and won't make fun of the
series I love that saved me from myself when I wanted to **** myself.
I'm going to find someone with a good heart, who CARES about me,
who will not be Broken but will be okay with me being Broken. Who
will fix me. Not someone who just wants an ego boost like you do.
**you will never find anyone like that. You will never do better than
him.**
You really aren't who you used to be
**So? You should take what you can get, stupid girl. No boy has ever
liked you, and no boy ever will. No boy has even called you pretty
besides him.**
You're bad for me.
**You are not worth anything better**
You say you are sorry and regret hurting me, but I don't believe you
believe him
I want to believe you. So badly
so then just believe him!
but I can't
**you stupid ugly worthless *****
And even if I did believe you, you don’t even like me. You haven’t
even spoken to me for a month. A MONTH you *******
**You’re not worth noticing or speaking to. Why would he care? Just
take it. Take how he treats you and deal with it. It’s what you deserve.
Get used to it, *****
Even if we talked for a while, for a long while and you managed to
deceive me enough into getting close with you again, then if you asked
me out and we went back down the path we were on before you
dropped me so easily, I could never trust you. You text me flirty texts
while you’re WITH HER! You HAVE a girlfriend and NO girl deserves
to be treated like that. No girl deserves to have an unfaithful boy who
is in her life, but is not committed to her when he claims he is.
**You deserve that.**
Not even me.
Yes you do.
So I don’t deserve to be treated the way you treat me. I get a mini heart
attack every time you text me and I’d like you out of my life.
**Don’t do that. You’ll regret it. You are so, so alone you stupid *****
What are you thinking?**
I can do better than you. I can find someone who likes me. Someone
who’s idea of a good time doesn’t involve ecstasy. Someone who
doesn’t need to be drunk to say something nice to me.
Oh please. You will never ever find anyone.
Please just stop now. I have bigger problems than a boy like you.
Your problems could be solved with a boy like him though!
I told you that you didn’t hurt me. I am lying. I’m not going to let you
keep hurting me however.
**But the pain is so addictive. Let him keep hurting you. It makes you
feel like maybe you’re worth something, if you have his approval. If he
tells you you’re pretty, it makes you wonder for a second if the mirror
is wrong. You will never be convinced, but it makes you wonder, for
just a split second. It hurts, but it’s a lovely split second. Listen to me!**
I’m NOT YOUR F!CKING CONSILATION PRIZE okay?
**Yeah. You’re right about that, at least. What kind of ******
consolation prize would you be? Who would want you? You’re not a consolation prize to him, you’re just a another girl for when he’s bored. That’s all you deserve to be. Take it, worthless. You’re ugly. Take what you can get.**
Usually, this is where I’d say: I’m sorry. Goodbye. But I am not sorry
and I’ve apologized to you far too many times so far and I shouldn’t
have. I had nothing to be sorry about.
**You always have something to be sorry about. Apologize that he has
to look at you and your ugly face. That you exist. That you are wasting
space on his phone with your picture and your contact and your texts.
Apologize for being so difficult and annoying and desperate and
pathetic and self-centered and self-deprecating and say you’re sorry
that you ever offended him by being so pompous as to believe for even
just half a second (or half a summer, as it were) that you could be
worthy of his interest. Because you are worth nothing. You are not
enough. You are inferior. You are a failure. A waste.**
So goodbye.
-Ember.
**You’ll regret it later. You will never find a boy as good as him. Ever.
You will never even find another guy. You don’t deserve him, let alone
anyone else. It was a fluke that he ever ended up with the misfortune
of knowing you. You will never do better than him.**
Yes I will.
**No you won’t, you stupid ugly worthless *****
Yes. I will.
Jan 27, 2015
Jan 27, 2015 at 12:11 AM UTC
I once asked you "What is love?"
You said a feeling like no other
When you would risk your life
Give everything for someone
I know I've felt it before
If only for a brief moment
Because love is but a flash
A moment, a day, a lifetime
It's there so fast
Gone even faster
And what's left for you
But a broken heart
Jan 3, 2015
Jan 3, 2015 at 12:34 AM UTC
it doesn't matter it's fine he is worth nothing to me I can let him go I wish I had just shut up no I don't miss him God I miss him no I miss the idea of him he was nothing special I am never going to learn why am I so overdramatic and pathetic I get stupid after midnight I hate life no I don't I just hate myself yeah that's fair enough I don't know what's wrong with me why did I text him during one of my broken moments there is something wrong with me I hate everything but mostly myself and him but I don't hate him no I really DO hate him I loathe him why did I waste my time I am a pathetic loser why I am I doing this to myself I can't escape my own head I hate everything why do I keep saying that I am getting sick of hating everything why does he have to exist I should ****** him with a chainsaw oh yes I would enjoy that oh wait that's illegal okay why am I spending so much time on it I should really be doing work right now I am really stupid okay I have accomplished nothing today I am just an option for him I am just another pathetic little ego boost I hope he dies alone I hope he is okay he is not okay I am not okay I am not okay I am not okay omfg what if wrong with me why do I have to be this dumb he is damaged from the divorce of his parents so he is being a ******* and acting out, maybe that's it maybe he will change NO. don't think like that he will not change ever don't expect him to why do you like him anyway I don't like him I don't like him well I kind of do I don't know what I'm thinking I can't breathe he would never give me a second look and I don't want him to except I want him to so I can break him but he won't I am worthless.
Dec 18, 2014
Dec 18, 2014 at 11:38 AM UTC
To those who protest on why they should say the word *****
Unfollow me
To those whose heart does not mourn over an innocent life of POC
Unfollow me
To those who yell "go back to Africa"
Unfollow me
if you cannot comprehend that your ancestors where not here first
To those who fail to understand their white privilege
Unfollow me
To those who scream out "what about black on black crime"
Unfollow me
If you're blind to the multiple genocide your people create and label as "war"
To those who simply choose to ignore this injustice
Unfollow me for no action at all is the greatest injustice of all
Nov 25, 2014
Nov 25, 2014 at 3:55 AM UTC