#much
there's a reason
goldilocks and the three bears
is just a fairy tale
finding a perfect medium
is less achievable
than human-like bears
at least for me
i've always been
too much
in every single way
i take up too much space
too much time
too much effort
too much energy
more than i was ever worth
and it makes me the villain
in my friend's lives
never the star
or even the lovable side character
but instead
the darkness creeping in
the conflict
the challenge to be overcome
my "too much"
becomes their character development
as they get cut
by my scattered shards
my sharp edges
but villains in fairy tales
don't usually end up being redeemed
do they?
they end up
cut open
or shoved in the oven
dead
defeated
and everyone is happier for it
May 25
May 25, 2026 at 11:29 PM UTC
Okay, having said all that, do you still wanna be with me?
'Cause like, I-I wanna be with you, like
Like maybe even forever
Holy **** okay, maybe not forever
I mean like I'm not saying not, forever
I-I actually have no idea what I'm saying
Are you mad at me?
'Cause it's cool if you are, right? Like, I don't care
But like if-if you are, then I'm gonna resent you
I-I'll forgive you
But I was just wondering like, okay, like, is this a sign?
Do I actually hate you?
I just wanted to be honest, right
Like, do you still love me?- my wife
Mar 12
Mar 12, 2026 at 10:18 PM UTC
Do you know the excitement I feel when I see your name?
When someone mentions you, it’s never the same.
When I do something that reminds me of you,
My heart starts racing before I even know what to do.
Even the thought of you passing my mind,
Leaves every calm I had behind.
You want to see what excitement can do?
My heart forgets how to beat normal when I think of you.
It runs so fast, it feels insane,
Just hearing your name does that again.
Mar 11
Mar 11, 2026 at 3:29 PM UTC
i dream of you still
and i still have your voice memorized
and scraped violently into my head
yes
it is all i have left
Feb 2
Feb 2, 2026 at 2:48 PM UTC
I used to shine without asking—
laughter spilling, voice unafraid,
the world wide open in my chest.
But somewhere between the echoes
and the rolled eyes,
I learned to lower my volume.
“Too loud.”
“Too much.”
Their words stuck like pins
in the fabric of who I was.
Now I smile on cue,
a quieter version—
scripted, softened, safe.
I miss the girl who filled a room.
I buried her under
the comfort of being tolerated.
And every time they call me better now,
I feel another spark go out—
and clap for my own disappearance.
Nov 10, 2025
Nov 10, 2025 at 9:32 PM UTC
I'm tired of worrying if
I'll eat my words one day,
say too much; love too
much
I would rather regret
what I said over what
I can no longer say
Aug 3, 2025
Aug 3, 2025 at 9:29 AM UTC
Too Much
Not Enough
Too Much
Not Enough
Too Much
Not Enough
Too Much
Not Enough
Time can haunt your head
Reminding you of death
Take control of you
If you allow it to
Too Much
Not Enough
Too Much
Not Enough
Too Much
Not Enough
Too Much
Not Enough
Timmmmmmmmmmme
(c) Debra Lea Ryan
04/01/2024
Jan 5, 2024
Jan 5, 2024 at 7:54 PM UTC
“**Few people know how to take a walk. The qualities are endurance, plain clothes, old shoes, an eye for nature, good humor, vast curiosity, good silence,
and nothing too much.**”
—Ralph Waldo Emerson
<>
A late-in-life walker, the words above resonate in my mind,
with a check, check, check, check and a voluble ding, reading
and nothing too much”
many a poem mine labored, birthed arrhythmically walking,
eyes see verses, verses fill the mouth, mind desperate as
the feet unceasingly trod round new corners, new visions,
Emerson’s words remind my well worn weary path daily renewed, a vocabulary child re-newborn, and how to keep all this forever,
until tomorrow, and nothing is everything all too much carried over
and nothing too much”
speaks to an openness in every orifice, be prepared scout-boy,
to adapt to nothing too much as hours earlier now recalled are ancient history, mind staggers at the minuscule differences tween yesterday and this exact moment in this exact place that has been reimagined, deserving of recording, notating, and my desperation struggle to
semi-successfully delineate, report, on all these
mini-magnificent miracles countenanced, overwhelms…
the brain furnaces/furnishes a thousand thoughts, a million worries,
slew of infinity-sized emotions like love of children, so it’s confusing to window-peeking strangers watching for the walking man with tears pockmarking his cheeks, unaware that his each stride is a story, a unique grace forward and too, backwards, history mine, reviewed, graded, and the comfortable shoes, the old sagging clothes well worn and beloved, fit like gloves, whispering in the good silence,
a lamb sacrifice to the
**good silence,
“human, your foibles and deeds, admixture of
blood inherited, a morality crafted by ancestors,
so the next step is
alway$*
and nothing too much” and everything…
Sat Dec10 2023
Shell Beach, Central Park, in my mind, and nothing is perfect
Dec 10, 2022
Dec 10, 2022 at 8:02 AM UTC
eyes speaks much ....
you will feel my love more...
more than i can say ...
more than my pen write...
just wait sweet angel mine...
wait our meeting soon ....
to look into each other's eyes...
to feel how much i love you ...
eyes speak much more ...
than words can say ...
yes sweetheart mine...
just wait to see my eyes...
and to realize it's words...
love you ...
and wishing you a wonderful sweet day ...
my sweet secret love ....
the most sweet secret i got ...
yours,...
hazem al....
Jul 9, 2021
Jul 9, 2021 at 3:32 AM UTC
I stand here
embarrassed
I gave you too much
Secrets that needed to be shared
that needed to see the Light
needed to be felt
needed to be seen
but now I stand here
raw, naked
embarrassed
the light is too harsh
the light
burns.
Apr 9, 2021
Apr 9, 2021 at 12:12 PM UTC
you live in the back of my mind, under my skin whether you like it or not. you left a lasting impression on me and many, many others.
could i be as well loved as you? as celebrated and cherished as you?
im not sure if i can hold the space for you much longer, but i wish that you would guarantee that it was where you rightfully belonged
you could belong to me, if you wanted so
tell me what you feel and let the rest fall into place. until we can find that closure, reveal the truth to me and you, i will feel like there is an empty hole shaped like you.
i want to hold you so close that we become one
touch the tenderest fragment of the memory of us
and remind me why i have held on for so, so long
is it the clarity that i see in your eyes? the stories we have shared about our families, and our pasts. what is it about us that makes me not able to remove you from my mind?
i would ctrl + alt + delete you if i could, but there is a spot in my bed, and in my head, where you reside, so peacefully, so lovingly.
it's where you say I love you. where you got on one knee and where i said, "I do." Fiction and fantasy, my love sign, my destiny. Can it be, the spot where we can be ourselves, away from expectations, and closer to best friends, to the listening that led to my - strange and everlasting fondness for your memory.
Hold me please and never let go. You fly above, and I walk below. Perhaps our pace is mismatched, therefore I must journey on in hope that you will be waiting at my destination. Just for me.
Dec 1, 2020
Dec 1, 2020 at 2:04 PM UTC
Too much, too little
I'm intelligent and kind
Two lies, two truths
When you bore me
I will leave you
Nov 11, 2020
Nov 11, 2020 at 8:09 PM UTC
i am stuck
to many people
too big too much too loud
a stray elbow, a well intended touch
too much
too MUCH
don't see me break down
don't touch me
don't hear me
don't feel me
don't feel
don't touch me don't touch me
don't touch dont touch DONT TOUCH ME
ITS TOO MUCH
Sep 19, 2020
Sep 19, 2020 at 1:14 AM UTC
<>
with time whittling my days down,
the plurality point of my days long since
surpassed, my poems to the wayside
fall as new generations seek the voices
that are nuanced to their ear, tastes,
I remain, for the more obvious, more now than ever,
forever for the poets who sign their emails to me with:
“I close with much gratitude”
spoke or unspoken,
you-see I-see your poetry nuggets in everything,
the extraordinary ordinaries!
that delight the weakening eyes, move the ****** muscles
upward and outward, those nuggets by that,
one can grasp
the nexus of existence in words few and singular, open/close,
and the filters that mark life as word worthy,
salutations of words like:
Gratitude
and all that matters is this simple, my friends, my children,
that I go down in days full of gratitude
for them, for them.
Sep 9, 2020
Sep 9, 2020 at 11:39 AM UTC
So much for them;
I'll forget them
So much for me;
I'll forget me
Apr 29, 2020
Apr 29, 2020 at 4:54 AM UTC
The rain can't be felt
The pain strangely dwells
Tonight in the meadow
I will be all alone and shrouded
Near the cloudiness on my window
Her beautiful curls fall down
When the red ribbons are pulled from the tips
The story is hanging from a thread
Like her shoes tipping from her toes
When we call it quits
Till I leave from the front door
Her heart is open
So is her world for a moment
Her body is not a wonderland
It's a weapon and I am not that strong
Apr 27, 2020
Apr 27, 2020 at 9:43 AM UTC
it hasn't even been a week,
still i miss you;
i cant stop thinking about
you
about how I ended things.
i'm sorry
i can't stop worrying,
you could my thoughts
i miss you
Apr 3, 2020
Apr 3, 2020 at 10:58 PM UTC
sorry, did i stutter too much?
i hope you don’t mind.
it’s just that i’m scared my heart will fall out of my guts
if i keep talking to you like this
because how do you say i love you without saying i love you?
“i miss you” is too general to be perceived as anything but platonic, isn’t it?
but “you matter to me” is too personal for my comfort,
and “you are my world” might just be too much
for the both of us
it’s not like i’m in love with you or anything,
i just think it’d be nice to feel your heart beating
against mine.
Mar 23, 2020
Mar 23, 2020 at 4:19 PM UTC
why do i
always start
to care
for people
i barely know
when they
probably don't
care about me
Mar 18, 2020
Mar 18, 2020 at 7:41 AM UTC
If I don’t cut the threads on my legs,
will gravity finally pull me down?
Am I doomed here to drown?
Mar 15, 2020
Mar 15, 2020 at 10:44 PM UTC