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#mm
Dawn breaks another cold day looms Off in the distance i hear dishes clank and old school cartoons The frost is crisp every things all white ,.......... That will change soon ,and it has Its nearly noon And i begin to contmplate upon the Spiritual journey im on And I suppose as the numbness grows discomforting My extremities become akward ,I'm having difficulties now still ascending There will never ,ever Even till the end of eternity Which coincidentally Is an incongruent term and quite possably The most contradictory oxymoronic statement Concerning time that shall transcend beyond eternity Wait I take it back Actually the statement made after that will be And speaking of incongruity If you dig enigmas  explain this In the absence of anything There lies a state of nothing do you follow me? Correct me if I'm wrong there cannot be kinematic In otherwords the change in position of an object with respect to its surroundings in a  given interval of time Whether time flows and we roll with it Or we flow through it I believe it is thee quintessential core of a three faceted  quantative illusion in alows reality to exist and not only  "be"  a   perpetuating matrix of quantum flux incorperating a ductile with minimal elasticity time space continum OK then if eternity or even time has no end then it could have never began Within this level of experience It would be, then not be, then be Then never not be Or existforeverolid state suspended animation in witch Everything existing never knowing Wouldn't that be something You could actually hear nothing Nothing could then exist Yet when nothing can be conceived or conceptual believed or deceived then nothing can decay so Essentially every thing existing all at once forever in  cognitive  self awarness ,or this mind based reality using only signals from external stimulus It limits us by only allowing lucidity agree with a time base frame of reference A sorta two way street black and white right or wrong And unfortunately for me this is how my functions in a hypothermal state I'm really still trecking   up this mountain well past the Snow line As I began to say there will never be a way to describe the emotions I'm incurring For lack of better terms its shear repubate mind stupiditry And a plethera or dumbly done things Plus I'm feeling guilty because I insulted the sun because she ran behind this mountain there went all the heat I know now and feeling responsible some how and yet on and on I wander pontificating on whats up in store  almost evening and now i can hear a mountain stream as it trickles  into a pitcuresque pond i walk to it ruhminateing in the fickilnesss I began this journey at first because my love no longer wanted me Not looking for reasons or meanings answers or anything I was on a quest to meet and expidite my own mortality Now hypothermal I'm seein the beauty in everything Freezing staring blankly In reflection I see a older me only inwardly I can't feel time having its way with me and a gentle lonely tear caresses my flushed cheek as if to comfort me and i ponder Watching the ripples that
0
Feb 21, 2020
Feb 21, 2020 at 6:25 AM UTC
Myeye
Dawn breaks another cold day looms Off in the distance i hear dishes clank and old school cartoons The frost is crisp every things all white ,.......... That will change soon ,and it has Its nearly noon And i begin to contmplate upon the Spiritual journey im on And I suppose as the numbness grows discomforting My extremities become akward ,I'm having difficulties now still ascending There will never ,ever Even till the end of eternity Which coincidentally Is an incongruent term and quite possably The most contradictory oxymoronic statement Concerning time that shall transcend beyond eternity Wait I take it back Actually the statement made after that will be And speaking of incongruity If you dig enigmas  explain this In the absence of anything There lies a state of nothing do you follow me? Correct me if I'm wrong there cannot be kinematic In otherwords the change in position of an object with respect to its surroundings in a  given interval of time Whether time flows and we roll with it Or we flow through it I believe it is thee quintessential core of a three faceted  quantative illusion in alows reality to exist and not only  "be"  a   perpetuating matrix of quantum flux incorperating a ductile with minimal elasticity time space continum OK then if eternity or even time has no end then it could have never began Within this level of experience It would be, then not be, then be Then never not be Or existforeverolid state suspended animation in witch Everything existing never knowing Wouldn't that be something You could actually hear nothing Nothing could then exist Yet when nothing can be conceived or conceptual believed or deceived then nothing can decay so Essentially every thing existing all at once forever in  cognitive  self awarness ,or this mind based reality using only signals from external stimulus It limits us by only allowing lucidity agree with a time base frame of reference A sorta two way street black and white right or wrong And unfortunately for me this is how my functions in a hypothermal state I'm really still trecking   up this mountain well past the Snow line As I began to say there will never be a way to describe the emotions I'm incurring For lack of better terms its shear repubate mind stupiditry And a plethera or dumbly done things Plus I'm feeling guilty because I insulted the sun because she ran behind this mountain there went all the heat I know now and feeling responsible some how and yet on and on I wander pontificating on whats up in store  almost evening and now i can hear a mountain stream as it trickles  into a pitcuresque pond i walk to it ruhminateing in the fickilnesss I began this journey at first because my love no longer wanted me Not looking for reasons or meanings answers or anything I was on a quest to meet and expidite my own mortality Now hypothermal I'm seein the beauty in everything Freezing staring blankly In reflection I see a older me only inwardly I can't feel time having its way with me and a gentle lonely tear caresses my flushed cheek as if to comfort me and i ponder Watching the ripples that
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59
i wish the things you told me 15 feet up were as concrete as the streets below us your very existence is extraordinary to me you came into my life like a meteor beautiful from far away but also chaotic and damaging sometimes chaos can be beautiful too though the weight of your words is stronger than the gravity keeping my feet planted on this balcony’s ledge you dared me to leap and promised you would catch me when i land but you can’t catch us both can you i know you’re running away from the darkest parts of yourself i know you know the difference between right and wrong begging for freedom begging for releases i want so badly to believe the sighs and secrets of our past were as full of vibrancy and authenticity as the crowded city square i wish time could turn back suns like the pages of a ***** magazine i want so badly to replay the events of that night and question the transparency of your words our worlds collided and my heart flatlined when you kissed me i think i died that night and came back for you haha
0
Dec 9, 2019
Dec 9, 2019 at 9:51 PM UTC
these are the things that i wish i could say to you right now
i want to know your pain i want to know your name your face your touch is euphoric and i’m in deep with someone who might be emotionally unavailable and i guess i need to get over that somehow or figure it out or go to sleep enamored euphoric ecstasy passion fire when i met you i set fire to my past you struck a chord and i struck the match have you ever met someone and known that you needed them to be a part of your life and you wonder how you ever thought you knew passion or love or fear or pain but i’m scared i’m scared to lose that feeling that i didn’t know was possible to contain in me i’m ******* enamored and ******* depressed you’re exactly what i needed to walk into my life and i know i was that for you too unfortunately it seem you were not ready for me and i feel my heart pulsating with passion i don’t even need your touch i’m just lacking from your gaze but you’ve already walked out of the door i have literally never ******* felt like this before in my life i feel like i can’t breathe but it’s not oxygen that i need passion intellect euphoria respect admiration emptiness regret was this a mistake? i’m in pain that things are the way they are and i know you are in pain because of life and loss of love i can still taste you on my lips and feel your gaze imploring me and all i want to know is what is going on in your ******* head i could pour myself into your soul forever left brain right brain i hope i’m on your mind but oh my god does it even ******* matter??? was this all just an experience made to build me up and drag me down? i’m scared to think that love like that can just come into your life and then be gone the moment you walk out of the door. love like that passion like that honesty like that raw like that truth like that. i have never felt so much oneness with another soul. my thoughts are scattered across my bedroom and my insecurities are creeping through the cracks in the walls. was it the drugs? or was it us? at first i thought it was just the trip that was making you gravitate to me but then your mouth met mine and my heart exploded in my ******* chest. i refuse to believe that sensation was caused by anything other than you, but at the same time i’ll admit substance probably allowed us to make that connection. i just want you to be able to talk to me. i know you haven’t let your past go and i fear you aren’t really ready to. and that is okay. you’re on my mind. my feelings are hurt but not only from you you are an actual dream and all my nightmares animated i miss your touch i would risk it all for another chance weak in the knees and weak in the heart you’re a dream and i don’t want to ever wake up sleep here with me now and hold me in your arms tell me that it’s okay and that i’m crazy crazy for you crazy for me crazy for feeling this way i want to know your plans and how involved in them i am when you wake tomorrow will i be forgotten? your words reassure me but i’m poisoning myself stabbing myself in the back sabotaging myself we lost ourselves and i found the best parts of myself when i found you i have never felt so connected so gravitated towards another soul in my life and i feel NAIVE for letting myself get so headass so quickly very poetic colorful vibrant raw genuine cathartic who are you? and how did you creep past my walls? i crave your authentic self i want to actualize your wildest fantasy fulfill your every whim please just make me feel good again god **** it touch me quivering trembling buzzing sighing touching laughing crying you always ask if what you do or say will make me hate you but there’s not a **** thing you could do that would make that true i’m ******* buzzing over you are you thinking about me? pollinate me you’re on my god **** mind running circles i’m getting fit i am rambling a conscious stream of raw thoughts and emotion really missing that serotonin spike i hate myself for feeling things but i love the way it makes me feel it’s ******* tragic and dangerous getting off on my own pain playing the most dangerous of games i’m hanging on your every word i just wanna sleep in your arms tonight again
0
Nov 26, 2019
Nov 26, 2019 at 2:38 PM UTC
sept 23rd 12am-222am
i want to know your pain i want to know your name your face your touch is euphoric and i’m in deep with someone who might be emotionally unavailable and i guess i need to get over that somehow or figure it out or go to sleep enamored euphoric ecstasy passion fire when i met you i set fire to my past you struck a chord and i struck the match have you ever met someone and known that you needed them to be a part of your life and you wonder how you ever thought you knew passion or love or fear or pain but i’m scared i’m scared to lose that feeling that i didn’t know was possible to contain in me i’m ******* enamored and ******* depressed you’re exactly what i needed to walk into my life and i know i was that for you too unfortunately it seem you were not ready for me and i feel my heart pulsating with passion i don’t even need your touch i’m just lacking from your gaze but you’ve already walked out of the door i have literally never ******* felt like this before in my life i feel like i can’t breathe but it’s not oxygen that i need passion intellect euphoria respect admiration emptiness regret was this a mistake? i’m in pain that things are the way they are and i know you are in pain because of life and loss of love i can still taste you on my lips and feel your gaze imploring me and all i want to know is what is going on in your ******* head i could pour myself into your soul forever left brain right brain i hope i’m on your mind but oh my god does it even ******* matter??? was this all just an experience made to build me up and drag me down? i’m scared to think that love like that can just come into your life and then be gone the moment you walk out of the door. love like that passion like that honesty like that raw like that truth like that. i have never felt so much oneness with another soul. my thoughts are scattered across my bedroom and my insecurities are creeping through the cracks in the walls. was it the drugs? or was it us? at first i thought it was just the trip that was making you gravitate to me but then your mouth met mine and my heart exploded in my ******* chest. i refuse to believe that sensation was caused by anything other than you, but at the same time i’ll admit substance probably allowed us to make that connection. i just want you to be able to talk to me. i know you haven’t let your past go and i fear you aren’t really ready to. and that is okay. you’re on my mind. my feelings are hurt but not only from you you are an actual dream and all my nightmares animated i miss your touch i would risk it all for another chance weak in the knees and weak in the heart you’re a dream and i don’t want to ever wake up sleep here with me now and hold me in your arms tell me that it’s okay and that i’m crazy crazy for you crazy for me crazy for feeling this way i want to know your plans and how involved in them i am when you wake tomorrow will i be forgotten? your words reassure me but i’m poisoning myself stabbing myself in the back sabotaging myself we lost ourselves and i found the best parts of myself when i found you i have never felt so connected so gravitated towards another soul in my life and i feel NAIVE for letting myself get so headass so quickly very poetic colorful vibrant raw genuine cathartic who are you? and how did you creep past my walls? i crave your authentic self i want to actualize your wildest fantasy fulfill your every whim please just make me feel good again god **** it touch me quivering trembling buzzing sighing touching laughing crying you always ask if what you do or say will make me hate you but there’s not a **** thing you could do that would make that true i’m ******* buzzing over you are you thinking about me? pollinate me you’re on my god **** mind running circles i’m getting fit i am rambling a conscious stream of raw thoughts and emotion really missing that serotonin spike i hate myself for feeling things but i love the way it makes me feel it’s ******* tragic and dangerous getting off on my own pain playing the most dangerous of games i’m hanging on your every word i just wanna sleep in your arms tonight again
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104
sitting in the dirt with my face turned up at the sky i am thinking of you i came to this place tonight to collect my thoughts but i am only thinking of you with eyes wide i open i came to the golden goddess         begging her take away my fears and apprehension i basked in her glory and warmth and let a single tear roll down my cheek and back into the earth but as she quietly crept behind the covers i am left with nothing more than my thoughts of you the night is dark and cold and full of terrors but i’m paralyzed by my feelings and held captive by my thoughts insects are eating away at my insecurities and flesh i want to know how to feel looking down on the city lights and up at the moon it makes me feel small i find myself thinking about your existence and how we both lived an entire lifetime before locking eyes at this moment i am compelled, turning to the moon for comfort i see her and i feel the intensity of your gaze you are coursing through my system like a drug like the blood that runs through my veins like the air i ******* need to keep breathing all i ask is that you be kind to me i try to understand the gravity of your existence and its separateness from my own and i am thinking of you
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Sep 24, 2019
Sep 24, 2019 at 10:45 PM UTC
ecstasy
You used to eat all the blue M&Ms in the package last. Now I eat all the blue ones first to convince myself I’m over you, Yet every time I do I only think of you.
0
Sep 21, 2018
Sep 21, 2018 at 8:13 PM UTC
m&ms
soft-serve and sunscreen, sandcastles old movies played on reruns via VCR top down, open highway lined with trees and sunshine how did these days pass me by so quick?
0
Sep 5, 2017
Sep 5, 2017 at 11:57 PM UTC
sand and stone
I always hated Sunday mornings So I cursed my retail job Doughnuts and coffee couldn’t make up For the sound of my alarm But that day it was different You came in with your sunglasses on Tattoos on your arm And that was what could have changed it all You said you’d pick me up at seven That I should bring my dancing shoes along I should’ve asked what you were on We walked into the restaurant It had a ballroom inside I must have stepped on your feet At least a hundred times Your hair smelled like citrus Your breath smelled of gin Your tattoos creeped up and around As we began to spin You showed up one Sunday evening It was just a couple months in Tears streaming down your face And I just let you in The story came out slowly Each chapter worse than the last I held you in my arms as I Tried to erase the past I wore a white dress one Sunday morning Flowers in my hair The Wedding March played overhead There was excitement in the air You held my hand and smiled With a chorus of “I do”s Now we’ve got nothing left to prove We made it all the way through I woke up early one Sunday morning To the baby crying next door I set my feet on the floor But you had gotten there before I found you in the rocking chair And she’s tugging on your hair And I fell in love again He died on a Sunday morning Sitting in a hospital bed I never thought it would end Our daughter was thirty seven I didn’t know what to do So I went and got a tattoo To remind me of you So I could fall in love again Even after it all ends I always hated Sunday mornings So I cursed my retail job Doughnuts and coffee couldn’t make up For the sound of my alarm But that day it was different You came in with your sunglasses on Tattoos on your arm But then you stopped and turned around And just like that It was gone
0
Aug 10, 2016
Aug 10, 2016 at 4:03 PM UTC
Sunday Mornings
I always hated Sunday mornings So I cursed my retail job Doughnuts and coffee couldn’t make up For the sound of my alarm But that day it was different You came in with your sunglasses on Tattoos on your arm And that was what could have changed it all You said you’d pick me up at seven That I should bring my dancing shoes along I should’ve asked what you were on We walked into the restaurant It had a ballroom inside I must have stepped on your feet At least a hundred times Your hair smelled like citrus Your breath smelled of gin Your tattoos creeped up and around As we began to spin You showed up one Sunday evening It was just a couple months in Tears streaming down your face And I just let you in The story came out slowly Each chapter worse than the last I held you in my arms as I Tried to erase the past I wore a white dress one Sunday morning Flowers in my hair The Wedding March played overhead There was excitement in the air You held my hand and smiled With a chorus of “I do”s Now we’ve got nothing left to prove We made it all the way through I woke up early one Sunday morning To the baby crying next door I set my feet on the floor But you had gotten there before I found you in the rocking chair And she’s tugging on your hair And I fell in love again He died on a Sunday morning Sitting in a hospital bed I never thought it would end Our daughter was thirty seven I didn’t know what to do So I went and got a tattoo To remind me of you So I could fall in love again Even after it all ends I always hated Sunday mornings So I cursed my retail job Doughnuts and coffee couldn’t make up For the sound of my alarm But that day it was different You came in with your sunglasses on Tattoos on your arm But then you stopped and turned around And just like that It was gone
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61
Hello stranger, Can I tell you something? Everyone's like a stranger to me. So; you know, it doesn't seem hard to open up to you. 'Cause all the people in my life are becoming strangers to me.
0
Jul 27, 2016
Jul 27, 2016 at 11:22 AM UTC
Hello Stranger
Hurts, all over.. Notice me, **** it. Call me her name, it hurts. It was the name you had for her, It was the name you called her. PLEASE I BEG YOU DON'T. It destroys me, It tears me apart. It rips me into pieces and now I've ruined your mood.... I'm sorry if I'm sensitive, I'll change, I'll shut up PLEASE, Just please don't replace me. Not now not ever. But you've already started haven't you? I'm just there, but you've got videos to keep you happy. I'm here uhm excuse me, you've got games to keep you busy. Hi? Hello? Bye? Now, you notice me. I HURT A LOT, I CRY A LOT But you know what? I keep silent because all the pain is worth you... So am I worth it too?
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Jul 21, 2016
Jul 21, 2016 at 11:29 AM UTC
**** IT
..I'm in love you ..I miss you ..I care for you ..I adore you ..I can't stand seeing you with others ..I get hurt too ..I don't want you to leave me too. .. I love you
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Jul 4, 2016
Jul 4, 2016 at 8:12 AM UTC
The truth is..
She may be just a friend But she is something I cannot compete with. And it doesn't feel good.
0
Jun 29, 2016
Jun 29, 2016 at 12:44 PM UTC
Her
This is it. This is really it. Something I am sure of, Something I cannot resist. For so long I was blinded, For so long I did not see, A special someone, Someone who is really important to me. I can't explain my feelings for you, A feeling that I have never felt before, A feeling that is stronger than before, A feeling of love for you. I won't waste this chance, A chance for a lifetime with you. Everything I would risk for you, For you have risked your heart too. I love you
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Jan 23, 2016
Jan 23, 2016 at 9:40 PM UTC
This is it
I escape. A new world, a new name, a forgotten past, Kissed by the wind and her fingers on my back, I travel to solitude. Whispers of the storm, cloud my mind, and swirl my thoughts, and leave me blind, until I am still. I capture stars in my eyes as they dance in their abyss. I know they are bound beauties that tease my heart with twinkling eyelashes, I stare at the abyss in regret and it cries, I could almost fall in her gaze. “The Last”, I decide, The time for bottles and lamps and the creatures that live within them is past, My future is not with stars, My tears form, I feel the loving embrace of the wind She knows my heart, yet is silent. “Thank you”, escapes the tongue..
0
Dec 29, 2014
Dec 29, 2014 at 1:37 AM UTC
The Last
I wonder what it'd be like to be in his bed For his bed to be, our bed For us to be partners And to stand side by side, hand in hand Facing the world as it comes I just wonder what that'd be like sometimes
0
Nov 18, 2014
Nov 18, 2014 at 4:26 PM UTC
I Wonder
I'm in love with a man A man years older than me A man who is married A man who has kids A man who is also my Master A man who is also my teacher A man who is above all else my best friend I'm a horrible person because I'm in love with this man I'm a terrified girl because I'm in love with this man I'm a lucky woman because I'm in love with this man I'm a better person because I love this man I've heard what they've said "They'll never make it" "She's an awful woman" "She's an idiot" I wish I didn't love him because it'd be easier for him But I do, and he loves me And when I hear his voice I know that it'll be okay no matter what happens
0
Nov 15, 2014
Nov 15, 2014 at 8:23 AM UTC
Untitled