#mindgames
If I were the ghost
- would you choose to be friendly?
Maybe one day I'll wake up and be living
If I break the parts
like the puzzle pieces
from the end to the start
If I break the parts
would you rebuild them?
There's times when I lose the image
If I severed the ropes
like the ones holding boats
from over the edge of this ship
If I severed the ropes
which way would you jump?
Sometimes I run from myself instead
If I asked a question
like the few I've asked before
many metaphors for it all
If I asked the question
would you answer it?
And now, the answer could be too much
If I were the infestation
- would you choose to be friendly?
Dec 12, 2025
Dec 12, 2025 at 7:39 PM UTC
You told me you missed me,
but that was a lie,
because the only thing you missed,
was the ability to play with my mind.
Jul 26, 2025
Jul 26, 2025 at 12:57 PM UTC
Depression was gained
Brains were strained
As we enter the game,
We knew it couldn’t be the same
We were supposed to be anew
But we all knew
School is only a prison
Even though we listen
We have finally risen
Speaking about the feelings
Like the red roses
Blooming in the fields
Causing healings
School has been causing friction
So I use fiction,
To stop a restriction
So I wouldn’t let the tears glisten
As school ends,
I hope for a happier time
But I can get in line
As I’m not the only one
Who has been inflicted
And restricted
Jun 10, 2021
Jun 10, 2021 at 5:56 PM UTC
The thumb and middle finger of my left hand pinched the neck of a sandglass. The sand leaving the top bulb was almost translucent, and although the glass of the miniature instrument was thick for its size, I could almost feel the friction of each grain as they slide down. As the sand formed a growing pile at the base of the bottom bulb, my ears became numb, and began to ache. My ears felt like the inside of a cathedral, the walls of which were collapsing. I look down to my right hand and see I am holding a shovel. Why do I need a shovel? I thought to myself. Then I felt my knees give way to the heaviness that surrounded them. I was sinking in sand, a giant ocean of sand. This game I had never played before now, but I somehow knew the rules. Drop the sandglass in my left hand and whatever force held this ocean around me in place would fall and shatter. Drop the shovel and I’d have no way to dig myself out.
How does this dream end?
Feb 22, 2021
Feb 22, 2021 at 12:30 PM UTC
#
**Where will you be
twenty twenty
I've got news for
you aplenty**
Leave me alone let
me pilot my drone
let me fire my missiles
in a no fly zone
I don't need your permission
to release ammunition
You might as well leave if
you're looking for contrition
Rifle Rifle—wait for it wait for it
Trifle Trifle—everything's legit
Eyeful Eyeful—never can forget
Look out! I strike without warning
Splash! Try again tomorrow morning
**Liar Liar
tongues on fire
can't put out the
forest fire**
Leave me alone let
me pilot my drone
let me drop my ordnance
in a no fly zone
I don't need your permission
to release ammunition
Get in my crosshairs
You'll be headed to perdition
Rifle Rifle—wait for it wait for it
Trifle Trifle—everything's legit
Eyeful Eyeful—never can forget
Look out! I strike without warning
Splash! Try again tomorrow morning
Leave me alone let
me pilot my drone
let me fire my missiles
in a no fly zone
Here's the facts hard cold
if I may be so bold
if you really want to win
you'll have to wait till I get old
**One step forwards
two steps backwards
Once released you
can't take back words**
© 2020 Mark Toney. All rights reserved.
#
Jul 11, 2020
Jul 11, 2020 at 12:22 AM UTC
If it is all just an illusion
No objectivity exists
It’s all in our minds
Who says wrong or right is present?
Dec 12, 2019
Dec 12, 2019 at 1:08 PM UTC
The cold, cold day-
Seems to drag on,
With the sky still crying,
Nothing seems to move on.
I feel conflicted,
Everything inside,
Burns through and through,
Nothing left to reside.
its july.
Jul 5, 2019
Jul 5, 2019 at 7:52 PM UTC
Pulling barbs from deep within your heart
Feel your soul be ripped apart
And all the miles of chain you swallowed
Must be thrown out
Screaming as they entered in
Your ears, your eyes, your mouth, your nose
burning down your skin
And the pain thickens in your head
Like blood pooling on the ground beneath the dead
Dripping down into your sight
Inkiness
as all the grime from past clouds of smoke are washed away
In a Tidal wave of grace
your ribs are bruised and crushed
In the Violence of Love
Ready to take the poison hidden in your bones
Dig Deep!
Let your old, iron stomach throw up
all the nails
whose place is in the wounds of Christ
Oct 20, 2018
Oct 20, 2018 at 10:06 PM UTC
i will cry
but tears will dry
and i will serve my time
Sep 27, 2018
Sep 27, 2018 at 10:32 PM UTC
My heart was shattered, but the tears keep flowing.
I’m crying because my delusion of who you were was shattered by the truth of who you are.
My trust is gone, and your promises mean nothing.
I don’t regret the past, I just regret the time spent wasted on you.
Everything beautiful always seems to slip away.
All I want to do right now is scream and let all my emotions flow out because inside it’s killing me.
You’re killing me.
Things may never be the same.
I’ll be broken, but only for a moment.
Cause it’s time to leave those feelings behind.
As I come to realize...
You’re not worth it.
Apr 3, 2018
Apr 3, 2018 at 11:35 PM UTC
Big Brother probably has me blackmailed,
for something I did in practically a past life,
never was one for playing the back field,
always more than kinda liked the spotlight,
plus I was comfortable it,
look how smooth I moved,
a fine guy a good man,
a bad boy but a cool dude,
not the type to stress you out,
or mess about and be rude to you,
nope no ma’am not him so how,
did they blackmail him oh well boo hoo,
can’t cry over spilt guilt,
can’t die over pet regrets,
you’ll survive that’s why they call it will,
not Smith’s kid but gifted yet no stress I’m set,
so let them watch me,
if anything they’re probably protecting me,
the New World Order has to have a face,
call me The Not So Anonymous Conglomerate of Everything,
stop freaking out everything’s fine,
and I can’t think of anything to do about it but type,
maybe make love do a few drugs,
then get back to the grind,
lost my mind,
tell me have you seen it,
it’s dark in here and there are cobwebs,
call me a cab I don’t have to be convinced I mean it,
Jesus,
Mary and Joseph,
I wouldn’t even believe I wrote this,
if I wasn’t the one that was there when He wrote this,
he as in me but anyways,
it doesn’t matter nothing does these days,
might flash a wave as we roll by on the freeway,
but other than that I don’t have much free time,
wanna know a not so abstract fact about Yours Truly,
sure why not let’s get to the plot of this movie,
I’m still living with my regrets,
can’t shake em like an ocean swim and I’m still wet,
this might not be a movie but it definitely feels like a movie set,
I guess,
all these screens I’m seeing these days has me confused,
I don’t know the real me nor do I know the real you,
I mean I thought I liked you but then I met YouTube,
and now well I just don’t have time hope I’m not being too rude,
it’s just these days I spend more time on computers than I do on you,
or with you,
and I’m sorry it seems it’s easier not to care,
go out this days and see Fifty Shades of Gray,
but not the shades that come with underwear,
the shades,
that come with disconnection,
as what used to be turn on tune in drop out,
begins getting spun in the opposite direction,
drop in turn out and turn off,
and this is the part,
where I don’t know if I should continue,
or if I should just stop,
so I stop,
don’t want to do anything I’d regret,
because I know They would love to blackmail me,
and they would’ve already if they had something to blackmail me with,
but they don’t having anything to use against me yet,
as I squint my eyes and focus on the TV set,
okay it’s not a TV it’s a computer but what’s the difference,
gosh this has been one heck of a ride are we there yet,
I give up let’s get going,
I’m ready to get off this ride,
leave this confused amusement park,
maybe go for a five day trek outside,
camp under countless stars,
lay on my back and gaze at the sky,
where I can be safe and at peace from the breath of the beast,
no screens nor cameras no intrusive spying prying eyes,
just myself with the Creator,
“Thank God I’m Alive!”,
then take another breath in and end with,
“Peace To All See You On The Other Side.”,
hi,
I too am in this experimental life,
please remind me of your name,
and enlighten me as to why we’re alive,
Big Brother probably has me blackmailed,
for somethings I possibly did in a past life,
never was one for playing the back field,
always more than kinda liked the spotlight…
∆ LaLux ∆
Free book available here: www.scribd.com/document/367036005/The-Sydney-Sessions-12-Steps
Feb 25, 2018
Feb 25, 2018 at 8:49 PM UTC
If you're going to be a child,
Then put me down.
I am not a toy, much less yours.
So go on,
play games with someone else.
Nov 21, 2017
Nov 21, 2017 at 6:45 PM UTC
My friends and I - what irony!
When you see people come and go
then wonder when your turn will show.
Just sit and wait
like on a ticking bomb
with a delay.
My friends and I - such irony!
They play their rules and games
to see how long they'll get away.
The choise is yours
to say or stay!
Where lies your heart?
How much to take?
... until you break?
My friends and I - the irony!
Nov 8, 2017
Nov 8, 2017 at 8:39 AM UTC
Reflection:
This one I agree with you
Mind's playing games with you
Baseless plans to maneouvre you
Utterly nothing, know that too
Man:
Why do we all suffer heartbreak
Why always put our life at stake
Save drowning people by the lake
Why do we have the victim's take
Reflection:
Weird questions again and again
3-Butyl-5(3,4-Diethyl Pentyl) decane
Like this, they're driving me insane
Take a breath and please try again
Man:
Solution to the problems found
Sherlock just got astound
White eyes all browned
'Not natural to be bound'
Reflection:
Stupendous ideology just created
Mental efforts all appreciated
Sensitive topic well debated
A golden reward now awaited
"Topics like these dont really end
None of the two in reality apprehend"
Sep 25, 2017
Sep 25, 2017 at 1:15 PM UTC
Man: (to his reflection)
Advise me! Tell me! Help me!
Not sure what I'm doing to me
Want out of this prison, help me
Tremendous spiny walls held me
Reflection:
Responsible but not strict
Positives in time are a hit
Think of the negative as ****
No charges, you're free to sit
Man:
Scars over my face
Can't properly tie a lace
Habit's becoming this craze
Trying to fill in and embrace
Reflection:
The problems are virtual
Complaints all perpetual
Dear this is conceptual
Happenings are all eventual
Man:
Close to your perspective
But misery isn't elective
All minds aren't receptive
Not all efforts are effective
Sep 24, 2017
Sep 24, 2017 at 9:48 PM UTC
A complete state of well-being
Is something we all hope to achieve
Though my mind constantly questions
If it's nothing more than an idealistic belief
What is truly well
What definitively is not
How does one get better
When the mind intentionally forgot
Will I ever find what I'm searching for
Will I set my demons free
Can I allow my will to loosen its grip
Just enough to find inner peace
Somewhere there must be a blueprint
Stamped upon my soul
The mind and body connection
That can one day make me whole
For now, I ponder the questions
Cause answers I have none
Yet staying true to my intent
Of finishing the journey begun
Jul 24, 2017
Jul 24, 2017 at 3:47 PM UTC
The punitive silences,
the bad atmosphere they generate,
the mind-games they use to try to **** you in
are telltale signs of the toxic person.
It could be your in-laws, a parent, coworker, your boss or spouse,
a sibling, a roommate, boyfriend or girlfriend,
someone you want out of the house.
Toxic people want to make you miserable.
Especially if you're a decent sort, they hone in on you like a heat-seeking missile.
They spew their negativity and blame it on you.
They lie constantly, or twist the facts to suit their changing needs of the moment
and they never apologize (so don't expect an apology, ever).
With a toxic person there is no reciprocity.
They sprinkle their toxic dust on you. It makes them feel better.
Their ulterior goal is to demean you, to make you feel smaller.
They project their worst tendencies onto you,
find fault with you for traits you don't possess---
a shadow of the **** that lurks inside them.
They try to dictate the emotional atmosphere
through their attitude or twisted mood.
They drain you of your energy, bring you down,
They'll always find a reason why your good news isn't great news.
Their agenda is to cut you down to their size,
to manipulate and control
to **** you over while they play the injured party.
Confront the bully. Speak up to the manipulator, the trickster, the backstabber.
but beyond a certain point
there is no point in arguing with them.
Don't try to change the toxic person. You can't.
You'd have better luck changing an orangutan into **** sapiens.
Only a shrink could change them, and then only if they hit rock-bottom.
Don't try to justify yourself. It's a waste of time which would only draw you deeper into their net.
Set boundaries to keep their negativity in check.
Stop trying to please them.
Let that toxic somebody in your life know you're onto them
and they can't get away with it anymore.
Don't fall into their trap, don't get caught up in their life-dramas
or try to get them out of trouble. Don't let them instill guilt in you.
But try not to take their toxicity personally.
Remember, it's them, not you. You are not to blame
though they desperately want you to feel you've done something wrong.
If necessary (and if possible), delete the toxic person from your life and move on.
Know when enough is enough.
Saying good riddance doesn't necessarily mean you hate them, it means
your own well-being comes first.
Immunize yourself. Preserve your inner strength.
Set your own rules.
And, when possible, just walk away.
Jul 11, 2017
Jul 11, 2017 at 2:23 AM UTC
This is the last line of the poem.
You got there
But you don't get it
You really do need help.
Because this poem rhymes.
You just missed it.
Go back, check.
You still don’t understand?
Well, you’re delusional.
You really do need help.
It rhymes. It’s a Sonnet. Sonnets rhyme
You are not all there, trust me
It’s in iambic pentameter.
If just because you don’t get it you try to make me the villain,
It would be so hurtful since I’m helping,
You really do need help. Let me help you,
You think you know better than me...I’m the poem
You must be insanely arrogant or just psychotic
To think you know better than me
You aren’t even reading me. We already established that
You. Aren’t. Reading. This. Poem. It’s about butterflies
You really need help.
As the first line of the poem says,
“Why would I lie?”
Apr 27, 2017
Apr 27, 2017 at 6:28 PM UTC
Manic:
synonyms: mad, insane, deranged, demented, maniacal, lunatic, wild, crazed, demonic, hysterical, raving, unhinged, unbalanced etc;
Depressive:
causing feelings of hopelessness, despondency, and dejection.
Manic
******* pairs of strangers every weekend, because them thinking you're desirable cures the hollowness for a minute or two
Depressive
Letting a man tie you to a bed and rip the skin off your shoulder with his teeth because you deserve to hurt
Manic
Getting higher than you've ever been so you can have an excuse to scream
Depressive
Crying at night and pretending its loneliness that's ******* you up
Manic
Driving a car you stole from your sister, even though you don't have a license or a clue where you're headed
Depressive
Drinking tequila during class so you can prove to yourself that you really are a badass
Manic
Dressing like a ********** and letting random men get you in their cars
Depressive
Punching a wall so hard your knuckle breaks
Manic
Calling yourself hot **** while you sob over the sink and then laugh at the world's beauty
Depressive
****
Manic
****
Mar 31, 2017
Mar 31, 2017 at 1:04 PM UTC
I'm a sinner
my pleasure derived
from torturing those
that are barely alive
Mar 22, 2017
Mar 22, 2017 at 6:49 PM UTC