#lethargy
sunlight has washed itself out overnight
silent hours, keeping some to himself
now it's grey, like a flatlined beat
ignoring rushing white coats
while she sits planted
in the middle
of the hall
yawning
and then
I see my job:
to look beyond
what's dished up
be in the driver's seat
and make something
good from this day
and every day
Mar 30
Mar 30, 2026 at 8:12 PM UTC
lethargy seeps into my bones
weighing me down
laying in my bed
mindlessly scrolling on my phone
no energy to do anything else
my eyelids heavy start to droop
bundled in blankets
my cat asleep on my pillow
maybe I'll give in to the slumber cues
even though it's early
but sleep is calling my name
lethargy covering me in warmth
as my eyes flicker shut
and I doze off
into dreamland
Dec 23, 2025
Dec 23, 2025 at 8:24 PM UTC
( )
> where drifts the self?
frore strath
where stalkers
drip their sultry rest
and our shoulders
thaw
into
the moor of dumb ”Earth”;
> where do the ARROWS lead?
to the soft cortège of gut
slunk in eve’s
inferring weave;
often whit’s
threnode
where bre^th ignores its end
> what stirs now?
wearing the guise of lack
[...]
ego, and
a patch of moss in sombre ”snow”
lurching
beyond limbs,
beyond need
> when loosens time?
the night clasps
thin as the sigh of origin
and i
(and we)
one sunken, shallow leaf;
do not rise /
do not recall
> none beside?
only the dreary,
detailed fatigue
of being
unmade, unmade...
> ▍
Jul 18, 2025
Jul 18, 2025 at 5:00 PM UTC
what a noble endeavour
to always appear measured
to never loose you cool
I've been through it all
the turbulent sea
the loss and apathy
yet I still remain
not quite the same
not quite insane
but getting there
wherever that may be
across the same sea
I was never a strong swimmer
not what you'd call a winner
but who needs medals
or other precious metals
they will only weigh you down
how heavy is the crown
I abdicate my throne
would rather be alone
you may not think of me as clever
but noble is my endeavour
May 11, 2025
May 11, 2025 at 4:47 PM UTC
I fell asleep outside,
on Lisa’s windy, 50th floor terrace.
It was indulgent, sensual
and lethargic - it crushed.
I forgot the time.
The sunset was intense,
a violent shock of color,
like an existential smack in the face.
I felt a lot of joy.
I’m feeling optimistic.
We leave for New Haven tomorrow.
I believe in the future.
Leeza popped her head out of the glass doors,
she was wearing a small, pale, skin bikini,
“Wanna go to the (indoor basement) pool?”
I stretched like a cat, “Sure,” I purred.
.
.
a song for this:
Hit My Heart by BOY
Relax by Vacations
8.21.2pm
Aug 21, 2024
Aug 21, 2024 at 2:12 PM UTC
its these winter mornings
where any thought
of greeting
the dawning day
with warm thoughts
hopeful exuberance
and a positive outlook
will quickly be silenced
along with
the birdsong of
that overly optimistic alarm
that melody
so carefully selected
to ease consciousness
into a brightened state
of motivation
of joy
despised within seconds
immediately cut short
and resented for
its mindless persistence
the first excuse
a need for another
ten minutes
of warmth and comfort
to prepare
for the day
for life in general
perhaps
the second
a negotiated concession
that there was
no real reason
to get up
early anyway
finally
uncertain whether
in victory
or defeat
the alarm will be
cancelled completely
along with the rest
of the day
Dec 15, 2022
Dec 15, 2022 at 6:52 AM UTC
Buzz of a laughter
Feedback numb
Nothing no more
Just echoes in my ears
Blue sky looked on by
Macabre eyes
The visit passed the limit
She sliced off my
Heartfelt loneliness
Skeptical angels
With their cynical remarks
Trying to get me to feel
Something I don't know what
It is a chip of a bird
That I once quieted for
It is a word of a lover
Who must still love me so
But there is a churning in me
A swirling spiral of nothingness
I hear my time is up
Jul 6, 2020
Jul 6, 2020 at 6:24 AM UTC
Doors in my mind
A lethargic breeze
Shutting them closed
Your knocks
Interrupting my monologue
Of solitude
Please go away.
I can't, I can't.
"Stay."
Keep knocking down my words
Keep reminding me of my world
Keep making me want to
Go outside
and
Face you
Jul 3, 2020
Jul 3, 2020 at 1:24 AM UTC
sadness that sweeps the eyelids
into a lead-heavy lethargy,
an awake weariness that
flicks through every bad thought
and pulls me from sleep;
like heavy curtains being dragged
across the threshold of
my vision - where all conscious
thought is a bleeding burden.
i just lie here waiting;
waiting for what? i do not know.
all i know is that i
cannot sleep.
May 10, 2020
May 10, 2020 at 8:54 AM UTC
I’m only myself
When I’m depressed
Evaporating
Into nothingness
Out of this world
Just a cloud looking down
Exasperated
Lost in my own town
Apr 27, 2020
Apr 27, 2020 at 6:45 AM UTC
It's been a long day.
Not as a day that's been filled with worries, but as a day filled with fake smiles
plastered together in shallow swathes.
It's been a long, long day
Even if I feel like this, at least I'm fine
If I take a sip of coffee, the coffee's cold
If I reach out, will you embrace me?
To be honest, I'm not sure what I'm reaching for.
The day's cold and the coffee's gone, so I'll leave you with this
The shadow of a tree's leaves in the sunlight is warm and gold
full where it should be empty
and open as a healing wound
Apr 24, 2020
Apr 24, 2020 at 5:40 PM UTC
Man of greed and narrow thought whose power holds the lands.
By cash alone you compel us all to follow your commands.
And willingly for our own needs we see your world as true.
Bought blindness to dictate our days on a course that profits you.
We close our eyes to the carnage and the killing that you call right.
And we pray for something better than greed and a show of might.
In our hearts we know your motive and the wrongs that you do.
And hope that there is some way we will not need to follow you.
You do not pause to think that you could ever be in the wrong.
And through your reins of power you drag us right along.
I see the world rebelling as by fire nature strikes us back.
With those you opposed, in the news, telling of your foolish attack.
Fear of what you lose compels you to fight change at all cost.
And because we do no better we will all eventually be lost.
Many of us have forgotten the simple things that we were taught.
Such as trust, morality and right are things that can not be bought.
The world when it is sane will come to hate your very name.
But by lethargy and greed the next chosen, sure to be just the same.
Jan 7, 2020
Jan 7, 2020 at 4:41 AM UTC
I miss myself.
She was good, and kind, and
Purposeful.
She was not a train speeding along on a track,
Wind whistling by,
Eyes watering and half closed.
She walked alongside it,
Marveling at the cars
Passing by.
Now, she is reduced to
The lethargy that creeps into her veins
And ties her to the car.
Dec 20, 2019
Dec 20, 2019 at 4:12 PM UTC
Today,
I am a
cadaver-in-waiting.
Cold, stiff and
ashen, I am
ready for
autopsy and entropy.
Jul 29, 2019
Jul 29, 2019 at 11:04 AM UTC
I want to scream, I want to cry
This ache in my chest is so unbearable
I am so very not okay, and I just want to know why.
I was perfectly fine, not two days before
What was it that tipped the scales this time?
I just wish someone would notice
That I'm dying inside a little more every day
This ache that pulsates inside
It's driving me insane
It's not something I can ignore, it occupies my every thought
Why, oh why, was I made this way?
My stomach churns and I want to hide
At this point, feeling pain is better anyway
This emptiness is saddening and not okay
But I nonetheless rake my nails over my skin, hoping to feel anew.
You’ve left me, love.
There’s nothing left of us here.
I’ve felt this a long time coming, but still it hurts now that I know you’re nowhere near.
You’re never coming back.
Of this much, I’m aware.
I just wish you could have noticed
My awful descent into this despair.
Would you have stayed, if you’d noticed?
I doubt it, I swear
You seem to have lost your care
For this, I despair.
I wish someone would notice
I’m drowning, I’m dying
I can’t seem to breathe.
“Keep going!”—instead I wheeze
Soft thoughts drift across my diamond mind
Unable to escape, this time.
I suppose it’s best that no one will notice.
I’m the strong one, I can’t afford to despair.
No one will notice, this I swear.
They mustn’t be aware of how very broken I am.
I’m here for them! I will never let them know
Vulnerability isn’t an option for me
My broken heart, mind, body—this, they will never see.
(Would they even care?)
“She’ll get through it, she’s stronger than this”
“I doubt she wants help, she likes doing things on her own”
(In the end, I seriously doubt it.)
(After all, we’re all drowning down here.)
Jul 2, 2019
Jul 2, 2019 at 4:16 PM UTC
Frozen, completely still
White squares on the walls
You've seen a thousand times before
Innate, familiar, completely new
Emanated by blackness
Dusted over by disregard
The memories of garnered squares
Digested like a populous pit
Halting your pant
for an immense instant
Exhale.
Ignorance is the way to see them disguised
As white squares on the walls
You wish you could conveniently forget.
Apr 8, 2019
Apr 8, 2019 at 9:51 PM UTC
I hate days like these.
My limbs are lead and I can’t seem to make a sound
I don’t want to move
But I have no “real” excuse.
My head is heavy and I struggle to stay awake
This is the risk I have to take.
I need to get up, I have to move,
The ground is so much more comfortable than I would have possibly understood.
I hate days like these, but
I must keep going, though I can’t describe my desire to stop
They will never understand these negativities floating in my head.
Tears gather at my eyelids, unshed sadness overpowered by lethargy
I cannot move, and I don’t think I want to even if I could
I hate days like these, I swear
Music blares all around me as I struggle to feel something else
Trying to recall a happy memory that isn’t tainted by you.
Nothing is okay, nothing is as it seems
I smile and hide behind this mask
(Let’s face it, they’d never understand)
Pretend to be happy when inside I’m close to breaking
I can’t give in, I must power through
I don’t know if I can, but I must try.
I hate days like these.
My body is heavy and I wish I could die
But even that would take effort that I don’t have
I feel like a statue, rusted and unable to feel
I don’t know if I can make it
My body betrays me, showing a glimpse into my deadened mind
I want to ask for help, but know none will come
Sympathy is not the same.
I hate days like these. They come without my control.
I cannot predict them, I cannot prepare
They come out of nowhere
I feel nothing,
I feel pain
Physical pain and emotional emptiness
This is not what I wanted to do with my day
I hate days like these.
I have so many plans I need to do, so much I want to experience
Why does this happen at the worst of times?
Why couldn’t it happen in the solitude of a Saturday, when I have nothing to do and no worries to plague me?
Anxiety courses through my mind, but my body won’t respond
My brain screams at me, unable to control its vessel
I’m not in the drivers seat
This is my dilemma, dead and horribly alive all at once.
Apr 4, 2019
Apr 4, 2019 at 12:32 PM UTC
They say she has it bad,
Taking down the boundaries
She never really had,
Yes, it’s all a bit lethargic,
following what was said,
Trailing eyes and messages
and the overwhelming dread.
Let it down slowly,
It’s a phrase she has heard,
And maybe they’d realize her turn for the worse,
Lethargy, it’s an eight letter word,
But it rules the innards and the outer,
It’s just something she’s learned.
Feb 28, 2019
Feb 28, 2019 at 12:16 AM UTC
Over the years, my stomach became
the grave of a thousand butterflies.
My ribcage filled with moths
craving the tiniest amount of light
they could possibly find in the dark.
So they are poking holes on my flesh
by feeding on my nerves, skin and veins.
And I let them do it.
Deep down I know they won’t stop
until I become one of them.
And deep down, I don’t mind.
Feb 27, 2019
Feb 27, 2019 at 4:00 PM UTC
Play me a melody
that I may slumber.
Not to count sheep,
more like to feed
on the carcass of
decaying dreams.
For in the lethargy that consumes
me knows no awakening.
For the sheep no longer jump
a cloud they are atop
the earth decaying in the nightmares
of life's living
apprehension.
Feb 12, 2019
Feb 12, 2019 at 5:47 PM UTC
I woke up this morning in
an America I did not recognize
So many years of just drifting,
certain of her elasticity
her ability to shake off
the parasites and naysayers
Now I see a buffoon where
lesser buffoons have capered
Why do I imagine that under
that bleached wave, are the
numbers 666?
Wake up all you who have
slept beside me, drifting
in the false safety that is not
We must dust off our shoes
and march again, doggedly
and without reservation.
We must demand justice and change...
peacefully and forcefully.
For this nation is one person
who stands up and says - "Enough!"
My wheelchair and your legs
must gather others and refuse
to be silent - evermore.
Nov 5, 2018
Nov 5, 2018 at 5:09 PM UTC
in a mud pit.
around my ankles, saddled,
slowly advancing.
Moving is a lot of effort.
tired, I just want to lie yet
and let me sink.
low,
low,
low.
more into this swamp.
my body becomes numb.
extreme pressures,
now around my ribs
suppress breathing attempts.
this mist fills my brain and,
I cannot even whisper...
Oct 1, 2018
Oct 1, 2018 at 7:31 PM UTC
Sometimes the emptiness is the heaviest
The world feels numb
Like my connection to the world has long been disconnected
Like fingertips sanded away
Nerves sleeping
The only taste in my mouth is of the food eaten yesterday.
I live in a land of suspension
Swimming between worlds that don’t want me
Stuck as a nomad
a child of purgatory
Aug 25, 2018
Aug 25, 2018 at 11:41 PM UTC