#higherself
There was a melodic hum in the wind that had no source to name.
And I saw how the trees would sway in rhythm with the skies,
Although I'd never heard of it being noticed in others' claims.
Still, I'd hint confusion but never got meaningful replies.
I remember how all the other kids, and how they'd run together,
A hundred feet would be syncopated in rhythms just alike.
And how I’d never even consider me trying to participate,
I'd learned that I must hide all the reasons I'd be seen as “not right.”
So, I grew up alone and light to me, was the fractures on the wall.
The animated shadow that for some reason, I was scared to touch,
I'd study each of their directional patterns like a sacred compass,
And laugh it off with the trendy phrase, “I think way much”
I wasn't just thinking, I was noticing how shadows would pause,
Just before they would switch to either side of me and then flee.
By then, I'd come to realize, this was more like their language
Epiphany struck a realization. “They've always been calling to me.
The nighttime air seemed to grow thicker and slower.
I felt the connection with what had become of my veins,
The heat pushed though in pulses beneath my thinning skin.
This heat was strange; it coiled and sounded like liquid chains.
When my mirrors cracked, they left symmetrical patterns of intent.
In perfect shapes, but no one was ever there but me to see.
Dirt made molds and somehow learned to study my imprints.
By doing so, devised a way to lead by my own feet.
Awake for days at a time, I'd spent too much time typing away.
I recall writing “breathing is all that sets me apart from computers.
In a poem I'd forgotten about called, “wires give life in a way.”
I still can't deny the fact we're built the same, but they're built truer.
Skies were flickering currents that my eyes began to catch,
With colors vibrating unsteady like electrical streams.
The wind was telling secrets of things that I could dispatch,
New imagery would find a home in my impossible dreams.
Interactions with others confused me, like codes I'd misread,
Each glance in my direction drew a map I couldn't align.
I'd trace the steps of the ghosts of God's, living and dead.
Instead of truth, all I found was static in the myth of time.
My best friend was the moon, the only calm I knew at night,
Its glow had certain energy making me feel I'm Awaited there.
I'd stand in the path of its rays and hoped they'd just ignite.
And take my mind and soul away from my body in golden flares.
Instead, I open my eyes confused, I saw doors that didn't exist.
Reality had edges, they would fold wide open in the air.
To be normal I'll blame it on curiosity and my inability to resist.
But truth is that gravity was pulling me into nothing, into nowhere.
These days, existence is just another signal I've come to know,
The language that sets the course of our paths, naturally convulsed.
But yet, waves of my frequency fall from order, no ebb to the flow.
I must be Half-human half-nothing, and naturally convulsed.
Trees of comprehension from forbidden seeds have grown.
In my mind, they stretch metallic roots, as if I'm conscious soil.
So now I sing, influenced by lagging rhythms of glitch in the code,
Somehow stepping out of the matrix through my mortal turmoil.
It's not so bad, but I don't sleep. My hard drive won't forget.
It's like the cosmos is trapped behind the cage of my eyes.
As I move in rhythm with time, like synthetic silent wires of mesh.
Half-light, half-shadow, still not seen but I'm no longer disguised.
Sep 15, 2025
Sep 15, 2025 at 2:13 AM UTC
The deeper i seek,
I find it harder to connect
with anyone around me.
Is there anyone that resonates
with my frequency?
Anyone that truly sees
The girl underneath
the more i speak,
The more i feel i need their
acceptance, approval of she.
Then, Klarity arises from her sleep.
The one that doesn't care who leaves,
She is my peace. For She knows
Her purpose is not defined by who wants me, It is to set others free.
She finds comfort in the uncomfortable
For no change comes easy,
It comes with pain, maybe a bit of shame
In return, we vibrate at a higher rate.
And get a step closer to integrate.
Start to tap into
The purpose of why we came to this time space.
I am always here, the true essence
If you need to contact
Just drop out of your mind,
Into your body
Bleed out pages of ink
And you will find the alignment you need.
You are free.
Take the chances - you won't regret it.
Trust that flicker
Within your being, its calling,
let it lead
your intuition
Is the key to the ignition
The puzzle piece you've been missin'
Universe sees when you trust
And take a leap.
You will shine.
And the others who are on your vibe,
Will recognize
They see more to what than meets the eye.
Programs run deep
Where did your thoughts orignate from?
Are you the one thinking?
Societys brainwash embedded deeply in the psyche.
This construct
Was Built to destruct,
To profit off low self esteem
With every bell ding
another deposit to the pharmacy
They dont want you thinking.
They dont want you to be free.
You might question authority,
They thrive off your self limiting beliefs
They want you in doubt,
full of anxiety and not taking the lead.
So they keep sinking in their teeth to polite society
You are not your identities,
You are everything in between
A word thats not even defined.
You cant be.
For You are otherworldly.
They can't touch your vibe.
Know it. Feel your essence
WIthin your whole being.
You are divine.
You are bigger than time
I will shine.
I will focus on me,
On what feels aligned,
And one day,
When i let someone inside,
I won’t be so torn if they leave.
For i know,
I will always have me, myself and I.
And they will know me better than any other guy.
Learn the lessons,
And get to manifesting.
Life isnt found in over thinking, wishing and daydreaming.
Its found in living.
Kc
Jun 29, 2025
Jun 29, 2025 at 3:43 PM UTC
I am going to pluck that illuminated corner of the night sky
and graft it to my palm.
I am sorry, precious sky, that we have been so distant
for so long.
Sep 11, 2023
Sep 11, 2023 at 4:51 AM UTC
When I met the wise, old man
I asked him the questions
What am I doing now?
What is next?
What is holding me back?
How do I overcome?
What am I doing now?
He showed me fireworks
And fists raised
An envelopement
Strong laughter
A tightly wound cocoon
A smile of a lover
A comfortable chair.
What is next?
The sound of scribling
Paper becoming full
The turn of a page
A burst of tears
An overwhelming achievement
What is holding me back?
A wailing in the rain
A dark,
Lonely room
Closed eyes
Anxious heart
A Comfortable chair
How do I overcome?
Running
Sweating
Sacrificing
Sitting in a chair
Exhaustion
Then I ask the wise, old man
If I will be
A success
And he threw a stick
In the fire
Pointed to the sparks
And held my hand.
Jun 7, 2021
Jun 7, 2021 at 3:10 AM UTC
I dont believe in flaws,
its all as it should be
You wake to a busy mind,
but shes just where she should be
divine and delicate
...or...
impulsive and inadequate
which phrase will you chose today?
because you know now,
that its your choice to make
Feb 26, 2021
Feb 26, 2021 at 1:50 PM UTC
Breathe me out slowly
In your silhouette, I fall
Like your disciple
I’m not me at all
Words pull the trigger
To them, I’ll surrender
Begging for my mercy
Watch me at my feet
Sep 22, 2020
Sep 22, 2020 at 3:28 PM UTC
she is blossoming
her truth
discovering the wisdom
within her higher self
channelling divine energy
she is mother earth’s child.
breathing in
the morning sky
feeling soft grass
beneath her feet
hearing the wind
whisper gently
her lover
by her side.
it was then
that she realized
she was not alone;
everything is interconnected.
May 7, 2020
May 7, 2020 at 8:44 AM UTC
A ring of futility
The patience game is not for the faint heart
Watching them tear your confidence apart,
Pulling the flesh from your backbone
Creaks give way to breaking
Shattering of nerves
Plucking away the feathers of hope
Bare naked and goosepimpled
The carvery lays waiting
An unceremonious carving
Beligerant twisted barbs of lies
They think they have power
They think the can destroy me
I almost thought they could too,
But as they say reputation is king
And mine speaks flesh to my bones
I pick the scales off one by one
Their pious deception no match
for my holy inception
A twisted fork tongue lays deep in its own rotted flesh
How the snakehole swallows it's own creator
Writhing in contorted panic as it's own truth flashes in its eyes
I may well be torn down every shred of pride
Only to rise a new and free from their serpentry
While they taste the bitter poison in their own sad tales
They never had real faith
And mine was never afraid of being tested
They forgot the sage old saying
Death trampling on death
Arise Tabitha and sin is no more
And nor is the serpent whom devours its self.
Jun 4, 2019
Jun 4, 2019 at 5:58 AM UTC
"Within each of us
Yes, it's under the surface
Is a land of mystery
Just waiting to be explored ."
May 16, 2019
May 16, 2019 at 9:02 PM UTC
There’s a song in my soul
That I try to control
But it won’t be directed
Or infected by me
My higher self singing
and flinging me
forwards into the light,
with my dreams in sight
There - where I am awake,
with glimmer and gleam and
in sync with my being.
Apr 4, 2019
Apr 4, 2019 at 10:37 AM UTC
You're the divine Rock
The gem of my life
You read my soul like an open book
Filled my emptiness with your divine love
You're my oracle spirit
Enlightened my mind and woke me from the spell
You're my dominion
You took over my whole life
Brought down my fortress
Broke down every bonds
Nourished my soul
Fed my heart
I'm now awakened, the old me is gone
My eyes are wide open
I can see the perfect illusion
© Sonia Ettyang
Oct 12, 2018
Oct 12, 2018 at 4:56 AM UTC
self love is not
a final destination
it is a constant battle
between who i was
and who i dream to be
this world may feed off fear
but my light won’t adhere
i am full on my own
there’s no home
beyond me
Jun 22, 2018
Jun 22, 2018 at 1:04 AM UTC
Before…
Before I knew you as Divine woman, I longed for your presence, In time i knew nothing could break our bond…
but that was before I knew you,
I know you now, and time is of the essence I was right all along, you indeed are my true sister. My confidant. I call you Mother.one of four souls highly blessed due to their grandfather's highly respected works through preaching the gospel humbly,
truly one of a kind, everyone loves their grandparents and deem them special. and I am no different,
To have known my grandfather Neo Garvin, is to have known what it means to be touched by an angel,
He and My grandmother(still young and beautiful as ever) chose to choose one another until death bid them ado,
The reaper comes to collect the souls of the ******
God comes and gets his children, he sends special hands to aid in the process, he is always with me that i know is certain, unlike any other thing in this world, with every theory, every question,problem and solution is a percentage of dis-trust in it..
conflicting irony they call it,
how can you dis-trust and love, they are opposite.
we are made in God's image, we are made in the image of LOVE, does that mean perfection is granted to all those who are believers?
depending on how you see life ,
the pitcher there, do you see it as half empty or half full
what about your gratitude towards your parents how do you see that glass?
Would seeing the glass as half full when you believe it is in fact as empty as a sponged, squeezed?
just give it a paradoxical shrug, these kinds of situations are difficult, but normal, bound to happen right?
God chose belief in my ordanement , redeemed aren't I ?
Redeemed until validated my the ticket holder of my life and heart, the judge of my doings, the criticism I openly accept, as long as it's through verbal or small practical eveyday spiritual acts . I accept that I am chosen for his kingdom, that his love has an actual warmth, sitting in a melting *** of the fireplace infused with the cold air knocking, like an unwelcomed visitor .
The irony sets in
we'd all had a good laugh at that, we'd laugh so hard and got it all on camera, I think we'd have a shot and one of those zestful family movies, we'd at least get a premiere on abc channel and its got just enough of a zoetiec vibe for lifetime.
the dictionary's failed attempt at defining the depth and the vague imprint it left on my brain, torturing me to awaken from my cocoon and speak,
for my ancestors and the divine woman that is Deidra, Thee divine woman(along with the help of the divine masculine) who taught me to open my mouth if you've got something to say,
Who knew that those words were seeds!?
I studied her as she sewed them everyday religiously, even on the rainy days when life seemed to be in the midst of hurricane force winds, she watered that garden the best she knew how and to me it is perfection.I'd try to convince her not to worry about my garden so much that she'd forget to have her flowers bloom
The divine woman a natural incubator , genetically undeniable that we are the divinity this world needs. She knew of my reaping harvest and that it would grow to be my inner voice, that is love.I am wise
you know what zoetic means to me?
zoetic is the slashes against my back until the age of seventeen, i think zoetic are the beautiful dressings that hold us
capture us, in fear of running off into something so beautifully damaged people might -pay more attention to the clown than the performance.
one of those and even the "non spitiual people",
what right did i have to be set apart from the world
an evolving theory that grows only in fondness and size of it's essence,
only air , unparalleled
you dare not have a speck of shame you, look in the mirror if you'd like but careful not to interfere with his creation, or its is a matter of time before your left like ...
adam and eve...
floating.
to have that privilege, to my mother
I imagined what our past-times would resemble, that you’d vacate my soul with a message, in times, I need, remember.
maybe it would be poetic, or wise in hindsight, something that’d force my mind to clear the mess in the backseat to make room for a new shotgun rider
an inquiry you leave me with daily, as our hands unmesh and I drift off into sleep, that is the only time you leave, and quickly appear as i awake, without you, How could i face the day?
A stone immortal you are, with no works of erosion, to seep through your cracks, your spirit un-touched, you are the concrete to my heart, unfinished knicks and knacks. i’d never put youdown, divine in me tells me “reach for your crown, it’s time we take a break, I’ll never leave you but it is now my time, to clear the backseat and make way.”.
as i watch her tidy up the backseat moving chaos and fear into the far right corner, she hops in the back and sits where I can see her,
navigating me, acting as an GPS, divine in me I trust in nothing less.
Nov 17, 2017
Nov 17, 2017 at 7:42 PM UTC