#herion
I am amazed more
and more
how much the mind can be stuck
in slavery
to thoughts.
I am less afraid of people
who commit suicide.
Suffering is so intense.
It makes me think of how
low our minds can take us
down to where
we feel we
might drown.
No one, not one person
is to blame for
suicide.
There should be no anger,
no shame.
Be real in life.
Do not shelter shame
as if it is a friend,
a payback,
or a way of life.
Shame is as deep as
******
is the devil.
Deep in an inkwell
Black tar stuck in
the pits searching
for free skies
for air
the soul is not for sell.
And it can come to this.....
Dead Enders
Places we have been to
Places we compare to
Travel light-years
In circles around us
Overtime
Around and around we go
Spiraling through the
self-disparaging
Thoughts we hack ourselves into.
Until, Sense-less
Dead enders.
So, unthread,
Un thread,
Un thread.
Unwind
Before your prospects
Leave this space.
Around and around
we go
Transcenders
Looking out, looking up
and
Down
Sinking
Please me here
Take from there
Give to him always
Without a dare
Sunk and done
Dead end right here.
Dec 26, 2024
Dec 26, 2024 at 8:39 PM UTC
Frustration eating my insides never again will I feel you
Always accompanying me through everything always by my side
Thick and thin but now I’m to think to even let you in and if by chance you allow me that bliss
You **** back, my eyes close anticipating your hit but it never comes
Allowing myself to be consumed by the anger of the blow, lingering, never able to feel your pain
My adrenaline swells bring out the rage in me
Can’t confide in anyone because they could never understand and when they can fathom it goes ignored
My pain, anger, and rage makes them mad at me and only because I can’t obtain your beautiful pain; **** your excuses it’s not like you can just leave, it would only tear me apart
Whatever the debt I will pay even if it leaves everyone in pain
May 5, 2019
May 5, 2019 at 10:57 PM UTC
The ocean crashes; waves above shore
Its peace, beauty, excitement & freedom in one
Water foams with the angry thrusts
Generate a swirling tunnel
Pulling me into its wide open gullet
Now mystified at all its power and allure
Apr 2, 2019
Apr 2, 2019 at 3:20 PM UTC
mother spills lies from her wine stained lips; the ones that I used to kiss goodnight.
"I love you," she says, but she'll do it again.
she'll shatter my heart and walk upon the broken glass, ****** feet and wondering where she had deceived me; but she's only deceived herself by shooting up another time.
going to drug deals at only age five, I grew up too fast and there's a world of chaos inside my mind.
the pain lashes out on me like I've been hit on the skin with a rubber band.
my toes sink in the sand and I stare into the ocean of the disease, she's drowning in the water but she knows how to swim.
Sep 22, 2017
Sep 22, 2017 at 11:35 PM UTC
He is an addict
Pain on others he never sought to inflict
He was only looking for a way out
And this was just another bout
Of self hatred and doubt
He took the drugs to ease the pain
He took the durgs to ease the strain
He took the drugs to try to stay sane
In he's place I might have done the same
In the midst of all the carnage
You'll find him there spoon and rig
As he cooks it down
A slight quickened breath is the only sound
Eyes wide and bright with the thought of relief
With hurried thoughts of release
He thumps his arm to find the vein
It's the path straight to the brain
With that needle the monsters of the past are slain
But other monsters soon are made
They are just a diffrent shade
For the candle and the spoon
With the needle creates an awful hewn
The tracks are laid
No one can save
There is no way
So I just pray
I'll never turn my back to a friend
Even when his given in
Jun 3, 2016
Jun 3, 2016 at 11:55 AM UTC
Did you know
That life would end like this?
Did you know
You were killing yourself ever so slowly?
Did you know
We all knew your pain you couldn't even see?
Did you know
in the last moments of silence
the pain you'd leave
Did you know
you where going to die that night, as you slowly lost control
Did you ever see
your choices weren't killing just you, but also me?
Did you know,
you where a brother to me?
Did you know
as we lowered you into the ground that that night was the last you'd see?
Jul 8, 2015
Jul 8, 2015 at 2:07 PM UTC
My creativity has created this creation.
The outcome of my creation reflects only to the Creator.
The inner Narrator narrates a repetitive monologue.
Believe me, I've seen the films, and I've read that ******* blog.
Long logging of nights.
Internal.
External.
Fights.
Anger lasts.
I employed that past to take power away from fear.
Aware now of being here.
Consciousness.
Humbleness.
This doesn't come from admission.
Remission of a previous mission.
My dispositions constriction from speaking up.
**** that.
That cup.
That rig.
Spoon.
***
Drug.
Love is what I need.
Love is what I give.
Creating only a creation to love to live.
Apr 28, 2015
Apr 28, 2015 at 10:44 AM UTC