#heartach
You were my drug
You filled me with a beauty
That was never ending
So tell me was it worth it
When you drove me into insanity
Forgetting you is not hopeless
But to do so is pretty tragic
For losing you completely
Is what made my heart so dramatic
Aug 10, 2021
Aug 10, 2021 at 6:21 PM UTC
My soul is ill
But I'll not find a cure
It is infected and rotting
Of this I am sure.
It bleeds and aches
From this sickness you have brought
Corrupting my spirit
Twisting my every thought
Distorting my inner visions
And contaminating my sense of sanity
Totally destroying my faith
In love, life and humanity
You are the bringer of pain
The lord of heartache and dismay
And I’ve become your disciple
To your malevolence I now pray
Set my soul free
From your dark incantation
So I may find my way back
To the light and salvation
I have given you my all
And can’t bear another day
Of this beautiful chaos
And your sinful ways
Release me now
Take my last breath
So I can at last be free
Even if it’s through death
Maybe I will be reborn
Again to the light
And then I can rejoice
That I’ve finally won the fight!
May 3, 2019
May 3, 2019 at 2:49 PM UTC
That is my biggest weapon, I am completely outrageously, beautifully, terrifyingly mad.
How did I get here? I have un buttoned my chest and unfolded my lungs presenting them to you. Hoping maybe you would help me breathe easy. I’m so tired of having to fight all the time, for the things I want, and the things I don’t want. I’m so tired, sometime I cry when I wake up.
How could anyone ever love something as easy as me? Yes, I suppose I am easy, I believe everything I am told with hopeful eyes, I see everything covered in gold and hold anything as a treasure. I do not know if that makes me wealthier or not.
I wish I knew what making love felt like,
if anyone knows that at all. I keep dreaming that I see him again.
But in my dream when I held him we merged into one being,
and I wept or he wept but I left him there because I wanted something new,
Something that didn’t feel so beautifully harmful. But would you listen to me I'm lying.
I do not want simplicity,
I have never wanted simplicity ,
I will never be simplicity
please, please, please fall in love with me.
There will always be more to see, things to find and uncover and I will make you eternal, turn you into ink and paper, make your existence tangible. You believe you know the meaning of life for there is none, but I disagree. The only meaning is to take something incomplete and turn it into something worth its content.
I am humiliated, my insides flooding out of me,
melting from my inside out. Just like the night light I had on my bed side ad a child,
the one that started melting night after night with my parent’s fight after fight. I did not want to sleep anymore,
if I didn’t sleep it didn’t melt and we would never have left.
I do not sleep.
please do not humiliate me.
Do not sow my chest to your feet and drag me into you our bed sheet where you unbutton your chest and lay within someone else’s. Be careful, I am easy.
Easy enough to love anything but easy enough to destroy anything too. That is my biggest weapon, I am completely, outrageously, beautifully, terrifyingly mad.
mad mad mad mad mad and loving.
That is my biggest weapon, I am completely outrageously, beautifully, terrifyingly mad.
Jul 19, 2017
Jul 19, 2017 at 2:11 PM UTC
That moment when you realize that you hurt someone
That means more than life itself
And it cuts them in the heart
And they bleed due to what you said
And you know there is no forgiving yourself
And you slip back into your demon of the past
And harming yourself is the only thing you know
But when they find out
They hurt even more
They blame themself
But it wasnt their fault
And they cry over you
And something in you dies
You know you cant forgive yourself
They want you to be whole and pain free
But because of what you said you cant let go
Because you hurt the thing that means nore than life
Apr 27, 2017
Apr 27, 2017 at 1:23 PM UTC