#hateme
i am peeling back the lies one inch of tape at a time.
you call me a monster for the fire,
but you cry when i stop carrying the torch.
down the side of the plastic,
there was a map of who i loved-
a row of initials like small, sticky altars.
but the map is wrong now.
the geography has shifted under the weight
of the "forgiveness" you tried to sell me.
so i peeled you off.
it was easy.
masking tape isn't meant to be permanent;
it’s a temporary fix for things that are prone to breaking.
i’m used to the adhesive failing,
to the way the edges curl when the air gets too thin.
i’ve spent five years pretending a paper-thin bond
could hold the weight of a heavy, iron world,
but eventually, the stickiness just gives up.
and now you’re backstage,
the salt of your grief ruining the makeup,
sobbing between the scenes
as if i’ve stolen your oxygen
instead of just my own attention.
🎊 looks at me like i’ve kicked a puppy,
demanding that i sit down and explain the mess.
but we don't need to "talk"- that choice has been taken away.
you can't exile me to the sidewalk
and then expect me to open the door when you knock.
you don't get to burn the bridge
and then ask why i'm not standing on the other side
waiting to catch your ashes.
they want me to be the public enemy,
the shadow in the wings, the cold, iron shield—
but they still want me to keep their name
close enough to touch.
you want the right to hate me
and the right to be missed by me
at the exact same time.
but a villain doesn’t keep a guest list.
a monster doesn't curate a gallery of friends.
a ghost doesn't save a seat for those who buried it.
an arsonist doesn't save photos from the house you made her burn.
if i am the glitch, then i am clearing the screen.
if i am the alarm, then the room is empty.
if i am "better alone,"
then i don't need to carry your alphabet
into the next act.
dry your eyes.
you’re the star of the show, remember?
you have the crowd, the gold, and the tragedy.
you have EVERYTHING you wanted.
i just have the gray, sticky residue
where your name used to be.
and for the first time,
the plastic feels
clean.
Apr 18
Apr 18, 2026 at 8:52 PM UTC
let the salt from my tears pour into your wounds..............still bitter and fresh like the first truthful cut
Aug 9, 2019
Aug 9, 2019 at 12:05 AM UTC
BE HAPPY. HAPPINESS IS A CHOSE. THINKING HAPPY THOUGHTS HELPS YOU TO BE POSITIVE. positive. negative. pluses and minuses. bad and good. positive positiveness. smiling, joking, laughing. SMILE! BE YOURSELF. so if I like crying.. NO! STOP DON"T SAY THAT. wait what? BE POSITIVE! so being yourself isn't positive? NO NOT LIKE THAT! so like what? FIRST OF ALL SMILE. but smiling isn't my thing.. WE CAN"T BE FRIENDS. why? NEGATIVENESS ISN'T MY THING. so negatively positive. i like that!
Jan 12, 2018
Jan 12, 2018 at 3:16 PM UTC
Let me come to you in your sleep, solidified by the moons light.
Watch over you and sing you stars for you to keep.
Running hands gently on silk sheets.
Cold skin on my fire, burning embers of deceit as I am not your dream.
Let me love you to slumber, treasures and locked away, but lost without that key to your heart.
Let me break in and shatter everything.
Oct 5, 2017
Oct 5, 2017 at 11:37 AM UTC
What a mess I’ve made.
Young lady full of false fantasies.
The passenger seat warn away with distaste and distant memories.
Let me just cradle your cranium.
Tell you your everything then flock you for cheap.
Tears fall and voices raise, not letting the weeping willow sleep.
I don’t want time alone.
I need to feel your skin stretch on to my bones.
I want to be more about you, but I’m worried your everything will overshadow and I’ll be nothing more than a fool.
Oct 5, 2017
Oct 5, 2017 at 11:33 AM UTC
Can I, just one more time visit your bedroom window as an intoxicated Romeo.
I will perform my love verses that I have written on beer mats throughout the night.
Let me dance for you under the streetlights of hazelton drive.
So sorry for wearing white, did not mean to be stained with the blood of window pane knuckles.
Sep 7, 2017
Sep 7, 2017 at 8:28 PM UTC
I still don’t know why we broke up really. You ended things so abruptly. And the only explanation you could give me was "it wasn't a good time for me to be in a relationship, and that it's not you its me..” Cliche... But .... just like that you were gone, leaving me wondering where you were for days, worrying, not knowing if you were okay.... I have no idea what you’re doing with your life or why you felt the need to cut me out of it, after thinking about it I immediately began dwelling on what I did wrong, what I could have done differently. I thought that by doing this I was being productive, like I could change what happened. But I can’t. And what happened isn’t my fault. And maybe you tried to tell me that, but no one could have made me think different...I couldn’t believe things were over, not that quickly. I have no idea if any of the things you said to me during our relationship were true. I really hope they were, but with the way you cut me out so quickly, it’s hard for me to believe you loved and cared about me the way you said you did. You gave up on us too easily. I wish you had tried a little harder and I wish that you felt I was worth it, because I know I am.. I wish we had a fight or one of us did something to cause the break up, but the fact that it was so sudden left me feeling completely blindsided. You told me you loved me and that you didn’t want to lose me. And then you vanished. It’s just kind of surreal..... I'm still angry and frustrated... You pretty much left me with a million unanswered questions.. or too long I have apologized to people about who I am, because I’ve always been convinced that it’s always my fault. But not anymore, not this time, I’m not going to apologize to you. Yes, I am insecure and am always trying to figure out what everyone thinks of me. I can be immature and will always be a little girl at heart. I have a constant need to feel loved and appreciated; I have overactive tear ducts, and a tendency to be too clingy. But sometimes when you love something, you just want to be surrounded by it. I overreact about things too much and tend to get a temper when I’m mad. I’m selfish, stubborn, and defensive but I mean well. I’m small and stubby and I don’t like small talk..... And I still want too, really, I still want to hate you, but... I can't. I still like you, as much as I've tried to deny the feelings, they are still there....But I wouldn't want to be put in the position of potentially getting hurt like that again, so I've moved on and I'm doing me... I still wish the best for you, and hope you get what you want out of life.
Until next time...
The one that still loves you.
Jun 16, 2016
Jun 16, 2016 at 3:29 AM UTC
Everybody wanna hate me
And be me
In the same sentence
Im grimy no need for repentance
They say im too controversial
**** the media
I stay underground f the commercial
Ya born with nothing
Ya die with nothing
So why would I
Try hug the flames in the sky
Searchin' for light
Putting up a fight in the blight
Light my blunts to open my cells
Destined for jail earth is hell
Cant get a break from a job
So 9 to 5 switch to robs
At night i conjure my darkest identity
Me myself I triple darkness regardless
How many form come
I got many algorithm one by one
Step by step page by page
Im in a rage
on the verge of slayin'
Witha 12 guage
MUASSEnBERG **** what ya heard?
ignore the singining birds
They get hot shots for coming to my spots
And **** cops
They deserve to get drop
Slayin' the innocent people
How is thr land of free
But believe youll wake up soon
In this 21 century
Ill be. Exposin' there secrecy
So go ahead and hate me
***** but??????
Histories a lie
I seen imagines
Of Caesar
pretendin- to be Son of Man
Understand
They deify humans
Nothin' but carnal minded
Individual
This world is precisely
Satirical
Im caught in the diabolical imperial
How i survive is a miracle
Gave up childhood became a miracle
Spinnin' cob webs
Over my enemies and my ashes be
Tokes from **** smoke
Guns is tote
Just incase of an altercation
And you'll be at deaths administration
Beat the case with no hesitation
Im bringing chaos to every nation
Hope them ******* hear me
Clear me out
By the time they find me
Ill be out
Like Snowden spreaadin' luv
With Russia
Dont come to me cuz ill crush ya
Know the 48 laws to power
as i devour your flesh
With gun powder
Try to escape the reign
Only to entice more pain
To ya brain
Since the game done changed
Fools still aint rearranged
The pieces to the puzzle
I found i was stolen
From centuries ago and where do i go
From here i hear the heavens tryna
Give me a sign
Light coverin' the dark spark
For the spliff
Im the edge of th3 cliff
Soon to crossover throwover
Government entity
But nobody will see what i see
I got envisions of my
Enemies in casket im drastic
Graphic
With the designs i illustrate
And if you hate ?
That means you ******* cant relate
But you...
Jul 28, 2015
Jul 28, 2015 at 6:39 PM UTC
Love me
or
hate me
because
it's none of
my business
and my business
is to love you
unconditionally
and
I'm doing it
perfectly
Jan 11, 2015
Jan 11, 2015 at 1:33 PM UTC
I just hope you know
I love you
as much
as you hate me.
Oct 12, 2014
Oct 12, 2014 at 4:17 PM UTC