#fallingout
the water engulfs my body
I don't shake nor shiver, flinch or flee
I've come to embrace the cold caress
as it's the best that I'll get from you
Nov 17, 2025
Nov 17, 2025 at 8:26 PM UTC
your favourite colour
was blue.
maybe it still is,
i wouldn't know.
but whenever i see
that deep shade of blue,
that isn't too deep to be
navy and thoughts,
but also not
light enough to be
ashy and gentle,
i think of you.
this was your colour.
and i still
see you in it.
Jun 24, 2025
Jun 24, 2025 at 10:29 AM UTC
that moment
when you
found out
that you
fallen out of love
from the
love of your life ;(
May 26, 2021
May 26, 2021 at 11:16 AM UTC
he broke me more times than i can count,
more times than i'd like to say,
but i still blame myself.
i thought it was all my fault,
that i was a bad partner,
that i was the reason everything went wrong.
i think about him a lot.
i think about the scars he's left,
the few good memories there were of us,
that i loved him unconditionally,
his hugs, his touch, his lips, his hair
and the worst part is,
i miss it.
Nov 28, 2020
Nov 28, 2020 at 6:02 PM UTC
And I see our friendship
Go down the drain
The past three years
All swept away in one go
And I felt regret
That I left you this way
But I felt freedom
Freedom from the cage you put yourself into
And you may twitter away
How I had betrayed you
But you left me first
And I never spoke
Until today
Aug 24, 2019
Aug 24, 2019 at 8:41 AM UTC
so many strangers,
falling in love
with all the words
i’d written
for someone who has
already fallen
out of love with me;
honey, i wish
you’re a stranger
again.
Jun 26, 2019
Jun 26, 2019 at 8:44 AM UTC
i hope i kept an envelope of every being that you uttered
an envelope that i can return to, someday
and hope that most of them are still alive
an envelope filled with smiles, sunflowers, and high-pitched laughter
Jun 20, 2019
Jun 20, 2019 at 7:29 AM UTC
you stood there with sadness
braided to your locks,
and i was pretty used to making homes out of sadness,
and your eyes — they made me think
of both writing poems and running away;
i chose the former
and you chose to smile;
and smiling back felt like jumping
inside a book found in the bottom
of shared beer bottles,
and yet, we read it sober
with our fingers touching
when we’d turn to the next page
and darling, that was how we met.
and there we were gazing at the stars
wrapped in a sunset;
and we named them love
written for a wolf
trapped in a girl’s skin
and a girl dressed
in bleeding moonlights
and together,
we crashed into a fray, unworthy
of being written poems about.
and i loved you so f*cking much,
and even more so because
you couldn’t love yourself
and darling, kissing wasn’t
the most romantic thing we ever did —
it was running away from the world
and darling, that was how
we fell in love.
and running away
was our kind of poetry,
and running away got tiresome
after four books and a couple of heartaches.
and we ended.
abruptly.
like an anticlimactic poem
written by fading silhouettes
atop an abandoned building
as the rest of the world
caught fire and crashed down.
and there you were,
a piece of a debris
escaping my lips and sinking down,
like words in the middle
of a poem i could no longer write,
and i, a pronoun
you could no longer love.
and that was how
we became ashes
without dancing with the flames —
how we became a million pieces
of broken kisses
inside a poem made for two.
and that was how
we became strangers again, darling —
and that was how
i
lost
you.
Jun 13, 2019
Jun 13, 2019 at 9:26 AM UTC
we were at McDonald's
and you only ordered fries
there weren't any stars
that night
you held my hand
like you always did
after a meal
your fingers were as cold
as the midnight breeze
weird
you were always warm
whenever we touched
no matter how cold it was
it was strange
your skin somehow felt foreign
it was as if we were
doing this for the first time
you were staring at me
I didn't notice
I was on my phone
your eyes felt different
looked different
I used to describe them as
deep
captivating
oceans
I could drown in
forever
but now they're just
blue
dull
eyes
weird
you were smiling at me
I didn't notice
your smile felt different
I used to describe it as
breathtaking
beautiful
but now it's just
red lips and teeth
you were talking to me
I didn't notice
you were saying something
about a movie?
I wasn't listening
I used to love your stories
your voice used to breakthrough
my ears
straight to my heart
I used to describe it as
smooth
calming
soothing
but now it's just
noise
weird
you asked me what was wrong?
I didn't notice
I told you I was fine
we were at McDonalds
and you only ordered fries
there weren't any stars that night
you held my hand
and I held yours
god
help me tell her
I don't love her anymore
Feb 10, 2019
Feb 10, 2019 at 5:01 PM UTC
“I’m over it,”
I say through tears
Months pass bit by bit
Probably going to be years
My words betray me
I don’t say how I feel
Is this some ****** up daydream?
Is this even real?
“I’m over it,”
My heart’s not committed
My room is barely lit
Sobbing over words I submitted
If being melancholic
Was a sort of drink or mix
Then by God I’m an alcoholic
Bartender, show me your tricks
“I’m over it,”
I repeat in the mirror
I’m stuck in a pit
And you can’t make it clearer
You told me I would
Get over this cliff
Honestly I wish I could
But I keep wondering, “what if”
Jan 8, 2018
Jan 8, 2018 at 9:09 AM UTC
I've been holding back the tears
For years and trying to be strong
enough to hold this for so long.
Try to smile and understand
every situation just not to disturb
and cause any trouble to anyone.
And then that night I burst into tears
for I cannot hold it anymore,
and then he asked worriedly..
"Why are you crying?"
I keep on crying and crying,
heavily, I barely breath, then all I can say is,
"I don't know if you do understand me"
My tone sounds begging
for him to finally understand me,
the pain he unconsciously putting on me
And then he answered,
"Babe, I do understand you,
I just don't know what to do"
Now I don't know which
hurts me more,
The thought of he does not
actually understand the pain
that I am going through,
Or the fact that he knows
about it but doesn't care that much
that left him nothing to do
Jul 16, 2018
Jul 16, 2018 at 5:44 AM UTC
Do you think it might be time
To search deep inside of yourself
For the truth?
Haven't those promises
That always turn out to be
Bitter fool's gold
Caused enough damage?
I settled for silver
And I've settled for less
From you however
I expected nothing but diamonds
That's what you get when
You place your bet on shining lies
Better fit for a ring
Than a companion
Tomorrow you say
Will be the day we start new
This time there won't be another call
Ringing through your ears
Tomorrow is another promise
For the collection
Apr 10, 2018
Apr 10, 2018 at 10:30 PM UTC
long time friend, don't lie
I can see you
your sincerest hour
when you come with tail between legs
there is pretext
lie about lies, stop stop
it don't matter
ascend disconnection
the whothewhatthewherethewhenthewhythe or the howthe
give no pooh-bah
Mar 7, 2018
Mar 7, 2018 at 6:45 AM UTC
I sigh again, but it is as
Though you have become
Immune to the
Sounds of my discomfort
Indifferent to the tears
That soak my pillow
Late at night
Sliding effortlessly
Down the ridges and planes
Of my face
Draped in a thousand shades
Of sorrow
The shadows dancing
on my hollow cheeks.
Sunken and demure.
Your eyes stare in my direction
But my motions don't catch your eye
You prefer to ponder,
mesmerised,
by the faintest
Movement outside the window
Your brown eyes wide
And bathed in sunlight
The colour of honey
So distinct,
But lacking its sweetness
Follow the hustle and bustle
Of the Parisian streets,
As your hand lifts,
ever so slowly, from
resting on my shoulder,
Onto the ledge.
You've made up your mind.
~ZA
Feb 18, 2017
Feb 18, 2017 at 2:05 AM UTC
I'll be where I belong someday.
Purple sky, red and green lights,
And the California sun rising up when I
Need the light the most.
I go through another falling out every **** year.
No primary and no old people I can go to.
Too many mutual idiots who adopt the ones I love and kick me out of the picture.
I'll take the photo
But I'm not the one who deletes it.
My heart and brain are my memory card filled with all the drama-less days of these **** cliques.
I can only make myself move on but
I cannot make you never exist again.
I get we move on but I don't know why I'm picked last.
It's either new people or other's who pretend they know and accept the real me.
It's just never how it used to be.
That's why I'm going to be in California getting away
From New Englanders who know me now.
Just let me grow first.
I suggest
You do
The same.
Nov 7, 2015
Nov 7, 2015 at 12:44 AM UTC
Go through hell once, try to let go and forget.
The others come in, and there's the upset.
I'll be the bigger person, that job is done.
When it comes to getting praised and credit,
there is none.
Never knowing our right place.
You don't even have to say it to my face.
We are smart enough to find out what is said about me and everyone else there is no doubt.
But as the days go on,
and more is discussed as we say it and talk,
we forget who and what the problem is really about.
I walk this place alone, no problem there.
But you putting this weight on my shoulders creates you into being unfair.
There is no blame.
I feel no shame.
Since I said what I needed and did what I had to do,
and I handled with such maturity, discipline, strength and even,
I did everything and was very sane.
I won the game.
However, even if you are still very ****** off and horrified at what I did and if you don't agree, you have no reason to.
But I will be civil on you.
But for now on, let my decisions be up to me.
Where I go shall be seen in my eyes .
Perhaps my independence
will represent what you heard from the other side.
They were lies.
False criticisms, endless battles, force, and belief in no point of view but our own.
I may have frustration, anger, and obsessive talk,
but I have kindness to loan.
I have the right to lift off and release this pushing weight.
It's about the problem
not a persons annoying trait.
We all learned from this falling out,
even though I never received my apology.
I am over this and I didn't lose anything.
I can still breathe.
You learned so much from me.
Now, I understand everything, but I am not sorry.
I have words put in my mouth.
I have depression in my body and my head.
It's time for you to understand
the words that I said.
Now thank you for noticing
how I struggled with this weight on my shoulders.
Very heavy indeed.
I felt this weight that you all put on me went in and through my muscles and it effected me mentally.
It's now your turn to feel it.
And take in and accept your doing in this falling out that occurred.
You cannot let it push you down,
and you cannot let it make you trip.
So now,
you feel the pain I dealt with.
And even though I forgive without any sorrow,
I see now,
that you get it. I am right indeed, and you know
why I did it.
Jun 3, 2014
Jun 3, 2014 at 11:28 PM UTC