#disdain
Late Spring has made us from her trees
With leaves and flowerlets and bees,
That cling to blue leaves with their claws.
I see some tulips, you - white rose.
I stole a kiss from warm late night,
You - from a tremulous midnight.
Across your street you look at stars,
That smile and whisper and delight...
Now you pass me, as you exhale,
Or cherry petals we e-mail
To friends in Sweden or Norway.
There is no way you'll make me say...
I slip a note under your door:
"This June your eyes dark green", there's more...
I think I lost my soul past May
(you make me say things I disdain).
6d ago
May 28, 2026 at 2:48 AM UTC
I was in my bed
feeling some dread
of not finding any friends.
I woke up, I slept again
and I felt the chain of my internal disdain.
Apr 27, 2025
Apr 27, 2025 at 7:37 PM UTC
in lonely disdain,
a pulsating bitterness;
utters a bad word.
Dec 10, 2024
Dec 10, 2024 at 8:27 AM UTC
What path in this warren of life,
made you go from affection
in everything you said,
to disdain in your nostalgic eyes?
The promises we uttered,
expecting to keep them for eternity and after;
now dissolved in the acid of your treachery.
Was it just me who had that intention
of never leaving until the end of time
or, were they merely just a game of your deceit?
The mirage of your trust and insistence
of partly carrying my burdens,
as I did for you,
now reduced to ashes
from which an ember lowly emits in its wake.
The very envisage of us being,
that would hush me too a deep repose
on sleepless nights;
now keeping me up until dawn.
Perhaps,
it was my fault
for expecting so much.
For assuming you were
the one friend I'd needed,
in this deep, hollow concept of living.
I suppose what I'm better off with
is a barren version
of the shallow expectations concerning
human existence.
Often times, I reckon,
what would be of us
if we hadn't strayed apart to divergent voyages.
It is as though,
due to the circumstances uncalled
or our fraying nexus of connection,
we just weren't meant to be.
Sep 18, 2024
Sep 18, 2024 at 10:54 AM UTC
Time heals, they say,
but have you ever noticed
how every word you breathe is a sharp, unrelenting sting?
How you choose to speak them anyway,
no matter the agony they bring?
Have you ever noticed
the way I pick at every bruised scab
on the depths of my frayed heart,
that I once allowed you to hold?
Maybe it was my fault,
how I needed you to stay,
even though all my efforts
were nothing but in vain.
And as the blue-painted skies
slowly start to turn grey,
I still can’t find it in me
to look at you with disdain.
Although you might prefer to give up
on everything and leave
than watch wet paint dry;
I’m the one who's left to grieve,
over every truth and lie.
Sep 14, 2024
Sep 14, 2024 at 3:59 AM UTC
if you talk
about it
they'll tell you
its just a case
of centring yourself
before
it builds up;
placing yourself
in the moment
and understanding
what cannot be changed
except
there is
no progression
no steady curve
it goes from
a carefully traced line
to a scratched
scrawling scribble
that tears
through leaf
after leaf
of paper
whether the message
is legible
or not
apparently
its simple;
in that split second
between empathy
and apathy
before the destruction
of everything
outweighs
the strength
of all
that has been
accomplished
i simply need
to breath deep
and
count
to
ten
i'm still waiting
to be told
what to do
when my count
reaches ten
and
i'm still
angry
Mar 9, 2022
Mar 9, 2022 at 10:09 AM UTC
soon we'll say goodbye
to winter's boreal order
of freezing disdain
Jul 25, 2021
Jul 25, 2021 at 7:24 PM UTC
My life has been a downward spiral
The path is full of disdain and misery
The motion makes me sick
The darkness makes me sicker
And I’m afraid I’m on my way to my own destruction
Dec 14, 2020
Dec 14, 2020 at 9:48 PM UTC
I dislike the person I am
And the thoughts inside my head
I dislike the child I am
And the tears that I have shed
I dislike the monster I am
Like the ones beneath my bed
I dislike the ghost I am
And the words I haven’t said
I dislike all that I am
And the blood I’ve always bled
Dec 14, 2020
Dec 14, 2020 at 1:04 AM UTC
Were I to dwell a day
in the den of my enemies.
What would we say
of the corpses they ******
and threw in the corner?
Their history torn to ribbons
and chained to the same toilets
from which they garner
their greatest thoughts and values.
How many burning crosses
would dawn their books?
How many hoods for the wash?
Who-
pray-tell
does the washing?
The husks of flesh cut into pounds
festering on a shelf somewhere.
Once colored and cultured,
now decaying,
both in smell and in sight.
All by design.
At an oaken feasting table.
I see them eat the termites
as appetizers.
So many holes, it looks like dry split bone.
Some monstrous creature
that never had blood to spill.
From the corner of their slack jawed mouths
I see the wine swish
and drip
and drench.
They talk about Andrew Jackson
and the Civil War.
As I fight the urge
to light myself on fire.
Oct 28, 2020
Oct 28, 2020 at 11:28 PM UTC
Tonight
It comes down
The rain
The steel crisp blue rain
Puddles block my journey
The ground now laced in murky mud
One slip
And then that's it
Tonight
Pain comes down
DIsdain
Self induced rage pain
Lays me on life's gurney
To the hospital of broken souls
Mine's shattered
And that's it
Tonight
He comes down
The Blue Haired Monster
To revive pain for longer
I don't think I can keep swimming
Away
That's it
Tonight
Somebody loves me
The rain
The disdain
The Blue Monster's pain
They're all gone
No they're not
They'll always be there
But someday, they'll be smaller
And that's all she wrote
Dec 18, 2019
Dec 18, 2019 at 1:47 AM UTC
Perched before the mirror,
my eyes open to see
the greatest of loves there in front of me
With a smile, a chuckle,
a nod and a wink
I’m falling in love above my bathroom sink
My ocular captions
are fixed in a gaze
and neither denies
our lust-worthy ways
Never before
have I seen such a marvel
Brought almost to awe
yet I recant such sparkle
For my status is equal
or better than such
I say with full modesty
(as if I must)
The greatness exuded
Displayed on both sides
It is something that I
and the other can't hide
All of those who now know
and all those who shall see
will admire and greet us
down on bended knee
Consternation displayed
only to be outdone
by illustrious gestures
to this royal son
But enough of the rest,
there is just you and I
“All of those poor, poor people”,
we say with a sigh
They will truly not know
what it is to be us
When you don't have to worry
And don't have to fuss
This supremacy life
is a difficult one
My heart would feel pity,
(If I had one)
Instead it’s disgust,
disdain and the like
The fuel that's propelling me
forward with blithe
Still across from me now,
a reverent sight
Another near equal
and one who just might
be the only one worthy enough possibly
To stand here beside me for others to see
They think they all know
but know nothing they do
It's the jealousy had by them
for I and you
They’re like chlorophyllic plants
Dripping in so much envy
They try and they try;
They try to prevent me
From being the greatness
I know I can be
If just given a chance
Then perhaps they would see
But alas, in the end
it doesn't mean ****
What I care for is me
Only me
and that's it
Except my love for you
It's so deep can’t you see?
It is real
I can feel it
I truly believe
Only you I can trust
The one person who matters
The one I turn to
when life breaks and it shatters
All others are pawns
I can move on the board
Sacrificial pieces
for falling on swords
No dispute; I am king
Come stand here with me
It’s us versus them
And trust me they will see
It might not be today
It might not be tomorrow
But it will be soon
when they join me in sorrow
Make all of them pay
For what they’ve done to me
For the pain they’ve inflicted
Their fault, you will see
Anything that I do
Even though I will try
They keep holding me down
No idea; Don't know why
They are all out to get me
So plainly can see
But one thing you won't see
is not the last of me
Here, take my hand lover
and come with me now
We'll go out in the world
and together show how
Their pathetic existence
can benefit us
We may step on some ants
But there's no need to fuss
The hole that is empty
That is our damnation
Use things superficial
Instant gratification
It's a short-term "fix"
But will make-do for now
In our path, leave destruction
This much I will vow
Happiness, thoughtfulness
or concerned empathy
Some examples of words
unfamiliar to me
Therefore, no one can feel it
Must feel like I do
Only then I'm complete
Feeling I belong too
Feb 3, 2019
Feb 3, 2019 at 7:02 PM UTC
Hope for love,
but also expect pain.
Because life is real,
and not an imaginary lane.
Maybe that's the only way
to stay sane,
in a world filled with
hate and disdain.
©rajgomes
Jan 18, 2019
Jan 18, 2019 at 9:12 AM UTC
Life will sometimes feel uncanny,
Weird and void of understanding,
Life will sometimes let me tell,
Be loveless, and will hurt like hell.
Love will sometimes feel so forceful,
Leaving you to face the cold,
In that time to be remorseful,
Is to really hate your soul.
Life will sometimes feel like falling,
To the endless pit that's calling,
All those who betrayed their wrath,
Downwards surely strays their path,
Love will sometimes be disgusting,
You will sacrifice your dream,
For someone who is neither lasting,
Nor are fully who they seem.
Life will sometimes feel unchanging,
And all the joy in it like fading,
But no matter where you turn,
Wrath should always brightly burn.
Jan 4, 2019
Jan 4, 2019 at 5:25 PM UTC
Plentiful visions of gloom and sorrow
will still lurk in the air tomorrow
and so will lurk the tearless cries
from a million dried eyes
Has it (the hope) been lost?
Was it never really there?
Will they smile when the lights go out?
Will they look up at the dark sky and shout?
The void in the dull night sky
may very well be filled and soon,
but the one in their hearts will remain
the new genesis? "Let there be disdain"!
Will the skies show them the way?
deliver them, across the waters so cold?
or will they give up too soon?
on the song from the moon!
Jan 2, 2019
Jan 2, 2019 at 10:16 AM UTC
I can’t find the words.
Sometimes it comes out in a jumble,
Other times,
It’s all so quiet.
Help me make sense of the words that seem to fall out of my mouth.
I just need a little help.
Oct 4, 2018
Oct 4, 2018 at 1:18 AM UTC
Y O U...
You
didn't
step
forward,
As I
e
n
d l
e s s
l
y Bled,
Why am I glad?
.
Aug 19, 2018
Aug 19, 2018 at 8:09 AM UTC
I can call upon myself
but it's just a shell
bones break surface
offering quilltips
for forging poems
with
_graduated cylinder-strained
diluted-air grade
not from concentrate_
ink
the mechanism's safe
as sealed secret tombs
are safe
an echo of disdain
for which I apologize
aquiver with paste-
like listenings
replicating histories
foreign and estranged
to taciturn gaze;
functional, but
glazed
shells function as people
but not as well
words wish but don't tell
what awaits ingrained
in bones broken
for blessing
__pop!__ but distressing
echoing, echoing
pain empathetically parsed
but cannot relate
it's too late
I'm walking
but not talking
I'm listening
but not communicating
I'm dead
but not yet down
entombed in my head;
all that might have been
still can, but
a refusal to bend
is found
in my own pen
I've built a prison for myself
Jun 17, 2018
Jun 17, 2018 at 2:16 PM UTC
Don’t stare,
but
don’t look away
as if we don’t exist or
will disappear.
Don’t judge.
“So glad that’s not me”
It could be.
Don’t assume
“drugs”…”lazy”
“offer a dollar
it’ll go for *****
You don’t know
Don’t presume to grasp
the reasons,
the whys the wherefores
don’t write us off
as useless,
worthless,
less…
If you can’t help,
don’t want to help,
are afraid to help,
don’t trust,
then
Just offer a smile,
A good wish or prayer
But acknowledge we exist,
we, too, are human.
We breathe, we feel,
We need…
trust and love,
Not disdain,
not even pity
if that is all you have
to give…
don’t…
Apr 28, 2018
Apr 28, 2018 at 9:49 AM UTC
Hate is a disgusting feeling
Booms of disdainful words sound in echos
Doors slamming shut
Breaking the bridge we kept for each other
Foul tongued beasts
Sniping sentiments laced in cruelty
A mind acting on resentment
A mouth acting on molten anger
However a heart with a lack of empathy
Strains to keep from cutting ties
Bonded so thoroughly
Woven so tight
That only a feeling strong enough could alter them
Let alone sever them
This feeling is hate
Mar 22, 2018
Mar 22, 2018 at 3:37 PM UTC
Tied by a rope to the image
Of familiar comforting predictable
Misery seeing not the truth you cling
Like a baby to the cold hateful mother
She drags you through cities and islands of
Solitude filling you up on hate like
Rotten breast milk
They say you're a hopeless case
Unfit for true greatness for you have
So little to give
I say you Fear life more than death
Too many chances to take
Too many disappointments to endure
For the fickle heart Lost and confused
Child full of love
Don't listen to it's song
It only aims to fill you with disdain
To embrace the hate in you
As one more comforting hateful failure
That proves it was right
All along
Jul 29, 2017
Jul 29, 2017 at 4:14 PM UTC