#compulsions
Each morning, I feel this pull
Hello Poetry beckons a click, a sign in
Should I read? I nag at myself
Should I post?
“You have nothing to post!”
Oh dear, feelings of dependence
Tugs of compulsion
Addiction screams in my ear
I opt to let readers know what I’m thinking
Yes, Hello Poetry is compelling
Apr 29
Apr 29, 2026 at 10:04 AM UTC
Hard to clean your mind when you're so scared of showering
Not enough soap in the world to rid the thoughts that are overpowering
Feb 3
Feb 3, 2026 at 10:40 PM UTC
the sign speaks to you
in your mind
but you know
it is silent.
take a fifth one
feel the rough material
scratch against the skin
of your hands
take a sixth one
and be free
take a seventh one
and break the cycle
May 21, 2025
May 21, 2025 at 1:58 PM UTC
gotta be god or play god
i wanna have control
something something perfect body
something something perfect soul schrodinger's stranger
behind my door
he's here until i prove that
he never was at all
there's leeches in my skin
i can ******* feel it
gotta check myself again
just to believe it
perfection is holy
and symmetry is perfect
never, ever stop
even though it isn't worth it
Sep 10, 2024
Sep 10, 2024 at 6:07 AM UTC
do you fear fear
a nail biter? a bedwetter?
or are there other compulsions
you cling to
step out, from the stale shade of the dark
that consumed you
no longer does it
feel the warmth that the sun casts down
sometimes, it's all one can do to beat the blues
this road of life is rocky
and it sees us all stumble
you chart your course
stick to it
as a blade meeting grindstone
water's introduction to limestone
Feb 22, 2021
Feb 22, 2021 at 12:09 PM UTC
My calculated steps
Echo against marble floor,
Endless series of fours
A failing attempt to tame.
Burning in my eyes,
Shifting curtains,
Repeatedly,
The knot tightens.
Jun 10, 2020
Jun 10, 2020 at 9:23 PM UTC
I'll thrice kiss
your wrist. It's
the only way
I can know
that you'll be
okay. I promise
it will help.
Kiss Kiss Kiss,
Kiss your wrist.
Dec 21, 2019
Dec 21, 2019 at 9:00 PM UTC
Kissing my wrist.
1. 2. 3
times. I should
be good for
a few hours.
Then repeat again.
Stumb- stumbling stumble
over ov ov
stumbling over over
over over over
stumbling ov over
my over my
words. Every time
I try to
speak to you.
Kiss, 2, 3.
Now I won't
accidentally hurt you.
Picking at my
skin, pinching, frowning.
Cutting each and
every bite into
a perfect cube.
A PERFECT cube.
Into the car.
Kiss, kiss, kiss.
Now I won't
be in another
car accident. But!
Don't forget, don't
forget. Do it
again to be
sure. You have
to or else
you'll get hurt.
Hurt your family.
Hurt someone else's
family. Break apart
a whole life.
I can count
every single calorie
I have eaten
today without even
looking at the
label. I can
taste and tell
you which artificial
sugar is in
my energy drink.
But! I only
drink the ones
with guarana extract.
It's all natural,
so at least
kinda better, right?
FREEZE! Here comes
a new thought.
What if I
suddenly ran out
into traffic, got
hit by a car,
and traumatized someone.
Or, consider, if
I went to
a theme park,
and just jumped
out in front
of a roller
coaster, horribly traumatizing
a whole train
of children. A
huge explosion of
blood and brains.
Don't do it,
don't do it,
Don't do it,
don't, don't, don't
It's a thought.
It doesn't control
you. It doesn't.
Let it go.
Kiss kiss kiss.
Kiss, 2, 3.
Kissing my wrist.
Dec 21, 2019
Dec 21, 2019 at 1:45 PM UTC
i was at work this evening
sweeping back and forth
back and forth
and back and forth
...12 times
mind plagued with compulsions,
ocd, anxieties
i hear the whispers
muttered by those who think
that u were the one
who did this to me
wow, u really drove me mad,
drove me crazy!
but back to the scene at hand
i hear the opening notes
of that band
i know and that song
that became so comfortable and
oh so familiar
...zz top, sharp dressed man
i’m taken into a trance
this image of you smiling on this couch
oh so deceiving,
yet so inviting
i give in and sneak a glance
of you
playing your own one man air band
drums and guitar
with you’re long hair flying everywhere
like a crown around your head
...before those toxins turned your hair
as thin and frail as you
there’s a tug at my heart
and it hurts a little
what’s this feeling?
i haven’t felt this towards you in a while
but it comes by sometimes
hand in hand with that deceiving smile
for a fleeting moment
...i miss u?
before i remember
what lay behind
that venomous grin
then i’m angry
for once not at you
but at myself
i hate you!
i hate you
i’m supposed to hate you
right?
i didn’t know what to feel
before i felt that familiar sensation
a heavy weight in my chest as
my heart rate speeds up
and i have to pull myself back
into reality
quick! before i lose control
thoughts spiraling around me
focus on something else
anything else!
anxieties, ocd, compulsions
maybe it’ll ease the weight on my chest
i grip the broom in my small, sweating, trembling hands
and begin to sweep
back and forth
back and forth
and back and forth
...24 times this time
1/22/2019
Feb 21, 2019
Feb 21, 2019 at 2:38 PM UTC
Have you ever eaten so much
you got queasy or worse
found the porcelain god in your clutch
cursed yourself as dumb and perverse?
It’s really no joking matter to me
as now I picture myself there
pitifully low on bended knee
in need of an earnest prayer:
Lord, may I never again return
nor forget this impulse that brings me low
lead me to a more worthy food and learn
to shout to my ***** craving: Whoa!
Dec 19, 2018
Dec 19, 2018 at 12:48 PM UTC
went inside the hourglass to pull apart
the flakes of sand and what was found
inside had passed since the time
needed was just spent.
walked along the acrobats
and models so of course right now
there comes a gap to have to get across.
a rope swing can only break when it’s
tugged too hard // cut by the stars
the veins down my arms have traveled
too far
but,
with a good shelter,
nothing seems so bad.
Jul 9, 2017
Jul 9, 2017 at 5:13 PM UTC
i'm collecting the times i wake up
already feeling my knees buckle
from the shame, the nerves, the stares.
i'm hoarding the clocks that i've stared at
throughout my adolescence
when the nights were long and my blood looked redder.
i'm keeping the tickets i used to escape
the rumble and the jumble inside the house
back then when the walls were thin and my skin was thinner.
i'm checking the numbers, the drawers, the walls
again and again and again
just to see if anything is about to break again.
Mar 3, 2017
Mar 3, 2017 at 3:53 AM UTC
We've both got a million bad habits we don't tell anyone.
Not sleeping is one.
The nightmares that keep us from sleeping is another one.
When we're not holding hands, you snap your fingers.
I snap my fingers.
You rip those nasty skin next to your nails with your teeth.
I chew on my knuckles.
You put your hands between your thighs.
I use my fingers to tap on stuff.
When I'm frustrated, I hurt myself.
I punch the wall.
I punch myself.
You bite your lip.
I bite my lip.
We bite our lips until we bleed.
Maybe one day we can calm our lips down the same way we calm down our hands.
Jan 12, 2016
Jan 12, 2016 at 7:47 AM UTC