#archive
My shoulders carry the weight,
of generations past,
the effort of those who struggled,
to provide the life I now possess.
My hands bear the calluses,
of those who labored,
to keep my brow free from heaviness.
And yet,
my feet refuse to move,
as I stand motionless,
overwhelmed,
by the blank page they have set before me,
my own struggle amplified,
by the silence of my own existence.
May 1
May 1, 2026 at 4:51 PM UTC
stheyre goingto find me
thosefeelingsi tried to leavebehing but theyy sswoulndt leave me.
theywalk beside me in thesunlgith sheileding their eyes
and in the darktheysmile stroking my hair
sayingyou;re n o t e n o u g h enunciating eachwordhisssssing
whispers
never ever ever enough youcould ne v e r be en o ugh
too much at the same timg like please picka ******* feeling
shes an oldfriend thistype oflonliness
i know her well
.
Jul 27, 2025
Jul 27, 2025 at 2:07 PM UTC
Standing on the coast of the oceans
Enjoying the breeze yet lonely
Young Joseph, pushed into the pit of single self
An ochestration of fear
The fear of betrayal and unfaithfulness
Wait did I
Call did I
Calling out for a help out there
Calling out with the voice of afability
Then I saw a light flashed in the pit
Searchlight it seemed and that was it
It was your love
Exactly what I need
Reminiscing the night you took my number
It was satisfaction that suddenly killed my hunger
I'll keep it a memory lasting much longer
You gave me a clothe of friendship in the cold wearther of loneliness
Oh my God am rescued
The days of loneliness seemed like of yore
Your smile like the rising sun brought a whole differnt light of mood
The joy of your presence is of beggars belief
While your absence like a broken bridge on the highway
My goals seem very very far then
But with your intelligence they seem like at an arm's length
Your voice, a courage to my down soul
And your assurance, the fuel to my weak bold
Accomplished dreams I see with you
And the awareness of your love keeps me going in the days of trouble
Your sadness like a dark cloud covers my joy
And your sorrow penetrates my tough soul
It wounds it
That saddens me
It makes me feel restless and helpless
For this, I will always make you happy
No matter what
Do remember
The relation is only a ship
The ship may sink before we get to the coast
But the love will always stay afloat
Jan 9, 2023
Jan 9, 2023 at 10:31 AM UTC
These hands
Written on by life
Will write
With only my words
This death I’ve died
A thousand times
Is mine alone
This skin
That stood out in fields
Alone
That has drowned in sees
Alone
That has scarred from
Words and glances
These veins
Pumping through
This life force
The blood that brought
The marrow to the bone
That brought a life
That was never mine
Into the fabric of this body
Into the struggle, the effort
The wisdom, the peace
The day I was launched off my feet
Sleep crawling
To side lines
That I might never leave
The debris
Has scattered into memories
Forgotten
Even by themselves
These lungs
Have whispered prayers
Bellowed poems
And swallowed pride
Choking on the ghost of death
One last time
These bones have set
In crooked ways
A skeleton
That’s lost
The art of support
Stiffened from
Bracing for impact
From the very day
That I decided
That if I can’t shine
I’ll slay
Support myself in every which way
Support this weight
That I’ve hoisted on my shoulders
These boulders
That I’ll stand up
These feet
Leaving no trace
But the distance between us,
Will go
Where no-one will find me
Will dance through ditches
Curve into corners
Coast out of questions
Throttle and choke
The fear
Jun 8, 2022
Jun 8, 2022 at 2:40 PM UTC
When you look up
to the darkness alone,
when you feel wind
tickle your bones
and when it whips frost
into your eyelashes,
when the wintry sun
makes ground glitter
with its nascent rays,
when you look at with love
each sculpted flake,
when a smile spreads
on your cold lips,
may you remember me.
Jan 31, 2019
Jan 31, 2019 at 12:59 AM UTC
Looking back
Images in the archive
Each of one
Has a story of every own
Memories to bliss
Appreciating each of it
Realizing how long
These all been
Smiles at every turn
Good old memories
To be in storage forever more
But, not in my archive
Some things must be let go
Press delete
On every unworthy things
You’ve realized lately
Jun 19, 2018
Jun 19, 2018 at 10:40 AM UTC
The way you comfort me when I'm sad.
The way you make me laugh at the simplest things.
The way you always say I love you at the right times.
The way your hand always finds mine.
The way you hold and hug me close.
The way you kiss me.
The way I wouldn't change a thing about you.
I love you for you.
Oct 11, 2017
Oct 11, 2017 at 2:45 PM UTC
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Nov 10, 2016
Nov 10, 2016 at 2:51 AM UTC
I'm tired of chasing,
Unwillingly hating
Everything and anything
That makes my mind all hazy
Maybe
If I understood things just a little
Better
Then maybe I'd be squeaky clean
From now till
Forever
But I love to hate, and hate born from society
That unfair mother-f_cker that destroyed the best of me
My own little sister
Whenever she needs comfort
Turns away from me and toward
Her supposed loving mother
Who harmed me with wicked lies
That made me die inside
And I cried
Determined into her past I pried
And I found something
I should've let go
But it's hard to release a part of your heart
When it's bound to you,
Y'know?
But I tried
It's a struggle to push through everyday
Memories and pictures that within my own mind
Sway
Amplified
By the natural instinct, desire to hide
To hide away someplace,
Give up and
Just
Die
But I gotta stay strong
Fight my urge to wrong
I at least owe that to a "happy family"
Those who wronged me
I see this with clarity
But it's the part of me that takes pride
In donating to charity
My split and splitting divisions
Mindset, shows
Insanity
But not the monster I hold
In the darkness he grows
Old
And even though I hold him
So close
He grows bold
And I try to make him obey
Doesn't do what he's told
This vicious beast of fangs and claws he
Loves to roar!
But control is necessary
Others better be wary
Of angering
The demon that can be
Me
So please, just leave me alone
Because I'm an archive that holds everything you ever
Did wrong
To me!
Jul 28, 2016
Jul 28, 2016 at 12:38 AM UTC
The usefulness of memory–
a password-protected entrance
into the excavation of a
life already lived. The cognition
of bones successfully used,
of gray cells compelled to race
in the laps of modern progress.
True stories of people aged
and edging off the earth,
and the rubbing away of surface
piles of resourceful, life-giving dirt–
a quick trade for cubed
live stacking in steel skies.
This is how my memories feel to me.
My banks of memory do not
easily hold all that successfully
instant recollection. Sometimes
only electrical storms fire up
any noteworthy activity in my
archived destiny. Then
come days could so easily
be erased.
Jul 30, 2015
Jul 30, 2015 at 12:03 AM UTC
The time invested with this person, i might want to spend the rest of my life with. I ask myself? The mistakes i have made in the past, will our relationship go down the funnel into the drain? Because god has made me who i am, will god let her see the ray of light that sits beneath my heart. Understanding acceptance and truth is the hardest thing, but will truth make our relationship or break it. When i think about telling her, will she ever want to touch me like she does now, will she ever want to kiss me, or will everything diminishes in the matter of seconds because of the way i lived in my past.
Jan 25, 2015
Jan 25, 2015 at 11:59 AM UTC